Nonviolent Communication or NVC. This is a widely used approach to communication that has many benefits. And it plays a key role in companies and people.
How to generate connection, empathy and compassion between people. This involves the way of knowing how to speak and listen. And its results are quite aggregating and expressive.
So, understand now what Nonviolent Communication (or NVC) is, how it works, practical examples and how to apply it the right way! Do you want to receive tips and information to set up your own business. So subscribe to this channel and stay on top of everything you need to know to open your own company.
To try to make this matter clear to you, we will address the following points: 1. WHAT IS NON-VIOLENT COMMUNICATION (NVC) 2. HOW IT WORKS 3.
PRACTICAL EXAMPLES 4. HOW TO APPLY IT IN 7 PRACTICAL TIPS So, let's go ! 1.
WHAT IS NONVIOLENT COMMUNICATION (NVC) Developed by psychologist Marshal Rosenberg, nonviolent communication was inspired by the actions of great leaders. Like Gandhi and Martin Luther King, for example. Briefly, it is about verbal communication skills (whether written or spoken) and non-verbal (such as facial or body expressions, gestures, images, among others).
And this helps in the way each person expresses themselves and listens to others. In this way, our responses are no longer automatic and repetitive. Then they become conscious and based on the perceptions and interpretations of the moment.
All done by observation of behaviors and factors that influence each person. In addition, nonviolent communication works through active, deep listening. In order to seek and bring more attention and respect.
Thus, not only avoid friction, but also generate connection, compassion and empathy. And that's why NVC is also known as Empathic Communication. 2.
HOW IT WORKS Basically, nonviolent communication is based on 4 pillars: observation, feeling, needs and request. OBSERVATION The first step is to observe and focus on the facts. However, without judging or creating value judgment.
Understand what is really going on for each situation. Always acting positively. In other words, ask yourself what you are saying or doing that is aggregating or enriching (or not) for you.
For example, imagine that a person is constantly arriving late for work. Instead of approaching it like, “You're always late. ”, you can approach it in a non-judgmental and non-generalizing manner.
Like: “I noticed you were late for our last three daily meetings. Are you all right or is there anything I can help with? ” Notice what a more subtle and understandable way is to get the message across and resolve a situation peacefully?
FEELING The second pillar is to understand the feelings behind the observations made. Which we explain now in the previous pillar. So, name the feeling, that is, what you are feeling.
Like joy, anger, sadness, fear, hurt, anyway. Thus, it is necessary to know how to differentiate what one feels versus what one thinks or interprets. Literally, replacing the feeling of “what I think” with “how I really feel”.
In the example of the meeting we talked about earlier, we can cite something like: “When you are late, without warning, other people end up hurting themselves. Or even worrying about you. ” As a result, it is possible to create mutual respect, connection.
NEEDS Once you've identified and understood the feelings, now it's time to recognize the needs that are attached to them. What need was or was not met for you to feel this way? By doing this, it will be possible to make them meet.
And identifying them will go a long way towards having a clear and honest personal analysis. In other words, when someone consciously expresses their needs, the chances of them being met greatly increase. In the example of being late to meetings, when the person is late, deep down, you may be looking for the need for respect.
That is, by arriving late, that person provoked a feeling that, deep down, you felt disrespected. Therefore, your need is to feel respected and valued. REQUEST Asking for something is much more valued than ordering.
In this way, express your needs clearly, tangibly and objectively. Always on request. That way, the other person will be able to understand everything right.
In other words, what do you need to make your life better? In the meeting example, instead of saying, “Don't be late! ”, try something like, “I'd like to ask you to be on time for the meetings, okay?
”. Also, confirm that the other person really understands what is being asked. And try to use empathy to make the message understood and respected lightly.
So, in a nutshell, the 4 pillars of Non-Violent Communication (NVC) works as follows: First, observe and understand the context you are in. Always non-judgmental. In this way, identify the attitudes or gestures that you like or don't like in this situation.
Then understand the feeling you are having. Whether happiness, anger, heartache, sadness, fear, anyway. Then identify the need behind each feeling.
Finally, state your request clearly. Always remembering not to send. And yes, ask.
3. PRACTICAL EXAMPLES To make the example of the meeting we talk about here more direct and clear, we can summarize it as follows: “I noticed that you were late for our last three daily meetings. Are you all right or is there anything I can help with?
(Note). When you are late, without warning, other people end up hurting themselves. Or even worrying about you.
(feeling) This can end up leaving people feeling disrespected. (needs) Therefore, I would like to ask you to arrive at the scheduled times of the meetings, ok? ”.
(request) Another practical example can be made in a situation that happens in people's homes. Like at a family lunch: “Dad, when I see you talking about football over Saturday lunch, I see you seem angry and elated at times. (Note) This worries me a little bit because I'm sad that I can't talk about football in a lighthearted way.
(feeling) So I can't talk about something I like with a person I like better. (necessity). So I would like to understand what you think about it so we can talk in a light and fun way.
What do you think of us trying to do this? (request) These were just some practical and summarized examples of how to work with Non-Violent Communication. Just to try to illustrate more for you.
Did you notice how light, peaceful and conciliatory she is? Thus, communication avoids friction and is much more conducive to generating respect, connection and empathy. 4.
HOW TO APPLY IT IN 7 PRACTICAL TIPS 1. LISTEN MORE Avoid talking too much and try to listen more to what others have to say. Always without prejudice or judgment.
Be open-minded in these moments and pay close attention to what is being said and addressed. Be welcoming and make sure other people are comfortable with you. This will give people confidence that they are being heard.
And that your opinions matter. 2. FOCUS ON THE SOLUTION Encourage everyone to think about the solution instead of focusing on the problems.
Discussing the problem in an excessive way is something that can lead to nothing. Maybe just stress. Therefore, focusing on the solution will make everyone go where it really matters.
And so, resolve the issues that need to be resolved and move on. In this way, it will be possible to get out of possible frustrations and discouragement. Thus, they will be motivated to solve what they need.
3. DON'T ALWAYS USE THE SAME ARGUMENT Using the same argument over and over again leads to a no-nonsense discussion. And that generates exhaustion and discouragement.
In this case, explore creativity and look for other ways to approach the subject. At the same time, be flexible to assimilate opinions that are contrary to your own. And try to find new ways to try to explain your views.
4. KNOW HOW TO GET AROUND A “NO” Instead of fighting or getting upset when you receive a “no”, try to understand the real reason for having received that “no”. Investigate the reasons for this denial.
And work valid arguments to make that “no” have a chance of turning into a “yes”. 5. BE CONCISE The longer you go into your speech or explanations, the more likely people are to lose attention or get distracted by other things.
Therefore, be concise and be objective when speaking, expressing yourself or explaining a certain subject. 6. PRACTICE EMPATHY As we talked about here, empathy is something nonviolent communication seeks all the time.
And it is key to the success of any kind of communication. So put yourself in the shoes of the people you are communicating with to understand their points of view. In this way, you will be able to understand the emotions and feelings of the others involved.
Thus, you will be able to better monitor and manage your personal and professional communication. 7. STUDY WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR COMMUNICATION AS A WHOLE Always try to study ways to improve your communication.
This is critical to being able to further improve and practice your nonviolent communication. And here, we are going to leave 2 practical and straight to the point tips. The first is reading the book “Nonviolent Communication: Techniques to Improve Personal and Professional Relationships”, written by Marshall Rosenberg himself, who developed nonviolent communication.
It is practically the practical and didactic manual that presents and shows this methodology in a very simple way to be understood and practiced. It really is a very worthwhile read. If you want to know more about this book, you can click here or on the link we leave in the description.
And the other tip is to watch our video on How to Improve Communication, which shows simple and practical tips for you to be able to express yourself and be understood by everyone. This will definitely add a lot to your Nonviolent Communication. So, if you want to watch it, just click on this button up here or on the link we leave in the description.
Did you see how simple Nonviolent Communication is to apply? At the same time, it is very powerful and is capable of bringing great results. Both personal and professional, believe me!
And just to recap what we talked about here: 1. WHAT IS NON-VIOLENT COMMUNICATION (NVC) 2. HOW IT WORKS 3.
PRACTICAL EXAMPLES 4. HOW TO APPLY IT IN 7 PRACTICAL TIPS We hope you enjoyed it! And if you want to know more about how to set up and manage your own business, visit our YouTube channel, we have several videos on this subject, ok?
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