Free Masterclass On Flirting Secrets Women WISH You Knew!

[Music] most men flirt all wrong and it is genuinely killing your chances of connecting with amazing women but if you master some simple flirting techniques you are instantly going to stand out now today's video is actually more like a free mini course for you on flirting and I promise by the end of this video you're going to know exactly how to flirt naturally confidently no awkwardness no cringe because one of the things I'm also going to be sharing with you in today's video is how to recover when flirting goes a little sideways and that's honestly

what separates men that are great at flirting from men that are really not so great at it because as soon as you run into a little bit of a shift in energy or awkwardness it's like you totally view it as a failure and you give up and that's when you can be left on a date with this like weird awkward feeling because you didn't know how to recover so you're going to want to stay tuned because not only am I going to teach you what is flirting why it works and how you can do it

and some Advanced flirting techniques but I'm also going to share with you how to just naturally recover when flirting doesn't land perfectly now whether you are older and dating after a divorce and you're recognizing maybe I need to shake up my communication skills and have a little fun with women or you're brand new to dating literally just dating your first couple of dates your first time and you're thinking I need some material to experiment with this video is going to cover all of that for you now before I dive into this free course on flirting

uh I am Kimberly Hill I am a dating and relationship coach for men I'm been doing this for many years now and it is my mission to support good-hearted men get into deeply loving relationships and have fun while doing it and that is my dog Denny sitting in the sun down below here now firstly what the heck is flirting well flirting is a very playful engaging style of communication that ultimately has one goal to build attraction it is about creating genuine tension and excitement in a conversation and flirting is not by the way being overly

sexual and it is not not about trying too hard it is ultimately all about having Fu n it's about having fun when you have fun with women they feel connection to you and having fun and being able to flirt successfully is going to be a huge sign of social intelligence and a woman is just going to naturally feel more comfortable and confident with you when you feel like you can take the lead in conversation and make the conversation in enjoyable for her now some common flirting misconceptions that let's just clear the air with first is

that flirting means you have to be super confident no it doesn't you don't need to be super super confident flirting can be subtle and it can be very lighthearted okay flirting is just about words it's not just about words it's another common misconception you don't have to be a wizard in terms of everything you think of saying all the time your body language and tone of voice are just as important if not more important and that's 80% of our communication is through our body language now another misconception about flirting is that if she your date

the woman you're with doesn't respond immediately you failed that is not true flirting is about creating a dynamic it is not about instant results so get that thought out of your head because if you are expecting instant results you are not going to have the experience you want to have flirting is about creating a dynamic and an EB and a flow and a tone and a spirit over a period of time you don't just say one flirty thing once and then everything just magically works out for you okay so I wanted to just get those

misconceptions out of the way so that we can dive into the key elements of flirting now four kind of key elements of flirting I want you guys to think about or even just take notes and write these things down because it will help your retention today number one playfulness okay number one is playfulness keeping things lighthearted do not take yourself too seriously you take yourself too seriously you suck all the fun out of it and flirting is all about fun so playfulness is one of the key elements secondly confidence in terms of speaking clearly using

strong eye contact and owning your words there's a very big difference between saying something and saying something and owning what you say and we'll share some examples later in this video third element is body language if you're going to have fun in conversation you can't be just totally closed off to the world and like presenting an energy of awkwardness and insecurity body language is so important guys so you need to stand tall you're going to lean in slightly when you're talking you'll smile you'll mirror her energy and if you don't know what mirroring is go

watch my first video I did on flirting I don't even know what was like over a year ago and I talk about mirroring in that video this is even more specific content from that flirting video that did quite well on YouTube now the fourth key element here is the teasing the banter okay not everybody is naturally good at this but you're going to be able to practice flirting because you're also going to learn how to recover from when things go a little sideways now this is what creates that playful back and forth Dynamic which is

hugely important to create fun because fun is something that is shared between two people on a date right you can't just be having fun all on your own or she's having fun all on her own this is a shared experience so the fourth element is going to include the teasing and the banter now good versus bad flirting guys good flirting includes the smiling right the leaning in slightly and the super playful tone so tone is really important guys and you're not very good at delivering a tone that changes from like I'm telling you something really

serious to I'm telling you something quite humorous then literally go into the mirror and practice changing your tone around this is going to serve you really well on date it's going to serve you really well in business and friendships is really practicing what's called your delivery so good flirting has good delivery here's an example so guys do you always steal the best seats in the cafe or just today like there's this tone of light-heartedness and a bit of cheekiness coming out bad flirting is monotone and really has a lack of energy and and just kind

of focuses on generic questions like the weather is really nice today so what do you do right there's so much seriousness and like it's so Blas and this is something that a little bit of practice in the mirror will help you refine what say one question and then try saying it in two different types of tonality so you could ask that first question I asked you so tell me do you owe steal the best seat in the cafe and I want you to say that line in the mirror and practice different uh fluctuations in your

Tong is your intonation right tell me do you always steal the best seat in the cafe tell me do you always steal the best seat in the cafe tell me do you always steal the best seat in the cafe these land so drastically differently so make sure you're aware of how you sound now maybe you even want to just practice recording your own voice and listening to it back to get a sense of what is your delivery like right good flirting versus not so good flirting has a real different tone more so than even the

words you choose to say so guys if you have any comments about maybe awkward flirting experiences that you've had drop them in the comments and share with everyone so we can all just have a fun laugh light-heartedness about how this stuff doesn't always work or land perfectly for everybody now what I want to talk about about is the right way to flirt I'm going to break it down for you into some techniques you can even think about and conceive of because there are different ways to flirt here so if you have that pen and paper

guys you're going to want to write this down now the first technique is What's called the playful opener which is just starting a conversation with something really fun and unexpected the playful opener is about starting a conversation with something fun and unexpected okay so I'm going to share some example lines here you look like you have a secret Talent spill it like if I was just on a date with a really cute guy and uh I wanted to be flirty with him I'd be like yeah there's something there's something about you spill it spill the

beans what's your secret what's your story tell me who you really are and it's my tone and playfulness that is probably even more important than what I am saying okay you look like you have a secret Talent spill it you definitely seem like a trouble but the good kind or you might say something like you have such a mischievous smile what are you hiding see even slowing down the words and being playful with the words makes flirting so much more fun be honest though guys are you always this charming with everybody or am I just

special think about how you were delivering these messages because you guys can literally Google a list of flirty things to say but doesn't mean you're going to be good at flirting because what you probably need to be practicing is the playful spirit behind your delivery this is something that you can't just learn from a video you need to actually go deliberately practice you kind look like you have such a secret talents spill it right so your tone your intonation play with the speed of how you speak because usually slow is a little more deliberate and

confident and intriguing and mysterious so slow your words down this is the playful opener now there's also the push and the pull technique now this is teasing a girl while showing interest okay teasing girl while showing interest now teasing is something that exists on a scale which is why shortly after we're going to talk about how to recover if mess up here but you need to learn to experiment right so an example line of how you can tease while showing interest it's like well you are pretty cool but I am still deciding if we can

even be friends now if you said that in a serious tone she's going to mistake it for something serious and perhaps even be offended by it you're kind of cool but I don't even know if we should be friends yet it's like what the f no you're kind of cool but I'm still deciding if we can be friends there's a cheekiness behind it that means your words are being delivered with the air of flirtation and playfulness versus the seriousness this makes a huge difference here guys and where a lot of guys kind of get into

trouble is you lean too serious and a woman misinterprets it and goes like guy is kind of an ass right so you don't want to be misinterpreted practice your tone I really like your Vibe but let's see if you can keep up it's the competitive playful spirit which kind of draws people in a fun light-hearted competition right how though well I was going to buy you a drink but I need to make sure that you have fully earned it first and you know some women aren't going to like this one and some are going to

see this as an invitation into being playful right well you might be my new favorite person but got a Rubber Arm or I'm easily swayed so remember this is the push pull technique this is teasing a woman while showing interest okay now everybody has a different Tolerance on teasing and playfulness which is why you want to experiment and one of the kind of rules of thumb I want you guys to think about is when it comes to teasing women when it's INF flirtation don't tease a woman about something she can't change about herself put put

this as a rule don't change a woman don't tease a woman about something she can't change about herself like her face or her body or her family or whatever it might be you go and tease these things there's nothing she can do about it and it usually ends up Landing as an insult but you want to tease her about something that can be changed like how she's showing up on the date or or you might tease her about whether you're not sure about her yet this is a really different kind of teasing than being you're

kind of cool but I don't really like your face like you know what I mean like some people just can't think of the content here so really just you know rule of thumb is to never tease somebody about something they can't change about themselves because that's just usually an insult versus lightly teasing so again back to the examples here of the push pull technique is you know you might be the absolute one for me I'm still undecided it's like a little bit of push a little bit of pull she's not really sure where she stands

but she knows that you are interested now there's also escalation and light touch which is all about subtle touches on her body that reinforce the attraction now examples here guys are when you are joking and teasing with her you might just lightly tap her arm when you are are both laughing together this is a really safe form of touch when you're already in a shared positive Mutual experience such as Laughing together or you might just do a playful high five followed by holding on to her hand for just that extra second it's like that lingered

extra one not too long just that one extra second of touch or you might even just notice that she has like a piece of lint on her jacket on her sleeve and you just notice it and you kind of just brush it off her while you're smiling it's encouraging touch but there's a purpose to it and it's like you're kind of grooming and taking care of her right or you just lightly touch her back as you guide her through a crowded area such as a restaurant or a bar or even a gym if you guys

are having a workout date together so these are appropriate ways to include the escalation and light Touch without it being a vertly sexual or Force because sometimes guys are like okay I know that I need to touch her at some point on the date so like out of the blue you touch her and usually women are going well that's strange why are you doing that I'm feeling uncomfortable so it's important that the escalation and light touch has a purpose and an intent and is happening in a positive shared experience so think about that when you're

both laughing when you're both on your way to sit down somewhere it's appropriate to touch her versus when you are across from each other at the dinner table and you're part way through hearing her tell a story and you just randomly touch her leg there's appropriate times to include escalation and light touches and so a rule of thumb here is during a shared positive experience or um experimental or experiential as in you're both doing something together right you're guiding her which is why you see the movie scenes of the guy teaching the girl how to

golf and now he's appropriately touching her because he's showing her how to hold the club and so there's a shared positive experience that is leading to why you are touching each other in the first place okay so try some of those today uh and comment how it works and how it lands now I promise to get to the flirting recovery section so what can you do if you actually mess up a little bit now common ways that we mess up when we're flirting is that we are coming off a little too strong or a little

too forced right or we are trying a little bit too hard to be funny so I had a client that would kind of go sarcastic joke after sarcastic joke after flirting after flirting after flirting and what happened was there was no real EB and flow between the teasing and the flirtation and the actual building of genuine connection so remember flirting is not something you do consistently or constantly through the whole date with a woman it's something that happens here and there to create fun and playfulness in the conversation so try um to make sure you're

not trying too hard to be funny or fous all the time and then another common flirting mistake guys is over complicating the interaction okay so how can you recover well sometimes the best way to recover is just by acknowledging that you've gone in a bad Direction it's a light-hearted acknowledgement so an example thing that you could say here is like you notice that you said a comment or you teased her or you were trying to flirt and didn't really land or you got a little bit of that radio silence you got like a kind of

somewhat offended look from her then just Apologize by saying something like yeah I totally know that joke didn't land or hit like a lead balloon let's just pretend that never happened right it's just this light-hearted recovery so being good at flirting and building connection with women means you're also quick on your feet to recover when things aren't going so well now the difference here is that sometimes people go like oh no I I messed up one time and one mess up means the whole thing is ruined that's that's not the case when you buy a

pack of blueberries from the grocery store and one of them is rotten you throw it out and then you wash the rest and keep moving on right this is the same thing in flirting and in conversation one little tiny hiccup or mess up doesn't mean the entire dat or interaction is blown or over you just need to get better at recovering and that means you can say and acknowledge oh yeah sorry that didn't land super well let's just pretend that never happened or yep that was probably my worst attempt at being funny can we please

rewind let's just you know tell me something fun about yourself so these are recovery lines guys that acknowledge that maybe things didn't land so perfectly but you're still okay with figuring out how to deviate and move on from it okay you can also practice doing a smooth transition so if a joke or a light teeth genuinely Falls flat then it's okay to like you don't need to try and figure out how to recover and fix it in the moment you can actually just shift the conversation to something more engaging so you might have teased her

or said something that didn't land really well and you go well yeah anyway so what's something you're really into these days and you just transition to another topic so that you're not sitting in the awkward of something that didn't land super well okay now let's talk a little bit about some Advanced flirting techniques so once you've got some of those other techniques down you've been you began practicing those on your dates you're working on your tone and delivery in the mirror which is a huge thing then some of the advanced flirting techniques are holding deep

eye contact now that's that's a trick right and what happens is when you notice somebody and you have a bit of that sexual chemistry and sexual tension you tend to hold eye contact for just a little bit longer now obviously what's really important is when you break that eye contact you do it with a smirk or a little smile and that's what creates Intrigue so it's like you're kind of like lost in that days and then they might catch you and you're like you smirk and you look away it's the smirk that allows them it's

almost like the smirk is saying yeah you caught me looking at you because you're gorgeous and beautiful and I'm attracted to you versus if you don't smirk and you get caught in that eye contact and then you just look away it's like what the heck were you doing like what was your intention there so the little smile or the little smirk inserts the playfulness into the deep eye contact now a lot of people just will tell you hold deep eye contact and then you might go do that and be like wellow I feel really murderous

out here because I'm looking and then I'm like trying not to be caught looking the advanced fting technique is that you are looking that you are caught looking and that you're confident that you're caught and so you smirk before you look away and it's the smirk that says yeah you caught me but how could you not you're so gorgeous right so that's a bit more an advanced flirting technique now there's also the inside joke hack which is a little more of an advanced flirting technique which is is finding small details about your date and turning

them into a running joke so here's something super common right they like Taylor Swift music or she likes pineapple on her Pizza which I do but maybe you think that's disgusting and so what you do is you turn that little small detail into a running joke and you might say like oh man like if you like pineapple and pizza like I don't know if I can trust you now obviously it really has nothing to do with deep trust but you're being playful because you might notice a difference in your preferences or like oh wow so

you're a Swifty fan hey well I don't know I don't know if we're going to get along anymore again the tone in delivery is so important because you say that seriously she's going to take offense and then you're going to have to recover from that so the inside joke hat is something I do all the time it's something I would do even with friends that are where you want to be flirty and have some fun you run with these little small details um and you know you turn them into running jokes you might even reference

it a few times in your evening where you're like I don't know you know pineapple and pizza yeah just I'm still I'm still recovering from that breach and Trust right so you're having some fun with it now another Advanced Techniques guys is called the playful challenges okay they're challenging somebody so sometimes it's fun to have a little competitive Spirit on a date nothing obviously too serious like we're debating who's better because someone makes more money than the other person no no like you might just have this playful challenge of like all right let's settle this

what is the actual Superior breakfast food because I am fully undecided is it pancakes or waffles or is it Pop-Tarts or scrambled eggs and in fact this is something that my partner and I did on our very first date before I knew it was called a playful challenge which was settling how to make the perfect gin and tonic okay it was like is it with lime is it with lemon is it with ice is it without ice is it with Fever Tree Tonic or whatever other tonic and it was a playful competition over what is

the best cocktail and it's not a serious competition it's not something that's really going to create a deal breaker or non-negotiable it's something fun to debate and be playful with even if you actually agree with how she makes a drink or the superior breakfast food you can still have a little fun by disagreeing even if that's not how you truly feel that's just called H bringing in the spirit of playfulness and flirtation into your conversation so if I had to guess you are either a karaoke Champion or you never sing at all which one is

it what is this playful spirit that we're just drawing out of somebody okay so this is how to flirt guys I've shared some techniques with you how to recover when it doesn't go well and really one of the most important takeaways is to focus on the delivery focus on whether it is feeling playful whether you're really present in the moment and remember that flirting is something you dabble in here and there in your conversation you do not need to focus on trying to flirt the entire time with a woman because then she's going to not

take you very seriously so here is your end of video end of mini course challenge which one of these techniques do you like and go try using it in the next 24 hours and then come back to this video and let me know how it went and whether or not you also needed to figure out how to recover from this okay this is how to flirt guys I hope you really enjoyed this video this ultimately this mini course on flirting drop your comments below share it with the world so we can all become better flirters

and become more playful in our conversations whether you're dating after a divorce and need to just inject some fun and playfulness into your conversation or you're watching this because you're not even sure how to talk on a first date and these are some helpful tips for you guys to up your flirting game while still focusing on having fun and genuine interaction and connections with women thanks very much see you guys all next week ciao