how to emotionally DETACH | master detachment in dating, manifestation and life

it is time for you to enter your unbothered girl era because when I tell you the second okay the second that you stop stressing about oh but this person and that person in that situation or what's the outcome going to be of that or what if I don't get this or what about that mistake I made a year ago or what does that person think about me now once you let all of that go all the good desires will finally come to you because every time you question but what if but how do I do

this or I can't do this without them you are in a state of lack and Desperation and that is literally repellent to the universe which prevents all of the manifestations which were already on their way to you from coming to you and that is why this video is all about how you master Detachment this is an actual thing okay there is an actual secret to getting all the good Desires in life and it comes from the spiritual law of detachment and of course we're gonna break this down into all aspects when it comes to yourself

manifesting your goals dating relationships situation ships other people's opinions you name it at credit Club in this video and before we get into it don't forget that I have a podcast on Spotify so that now you can listen to all of my YouTube content on the go and I have a jewelry brand which is launching very very soon in the next few days please go follow it on Instagram because all of the earrings I wear in my videos are my own brand you guys have been asking me for so long and I can finally reveal

it so make sure you follow so you don't miss out on the launch chapter one The laws of Detachment explained see a lot of people get it twisted because Detachment is actually very simple if you are able to attach in the first place then you are equally as able to detach Detachment is the art of experiencing our feelings without letting them control us it's when you stop taking things personally you start looking at things objectively and you no longer get entangled in other people or situations and the easiest way to understand this is through the

six principles of the Law of Detachment here we go one allow others to be who they are stop trying to change people fix them or Force connections that clearly are not there to allow yourself to be authentic this practice will finally allow you to detach from the opinions that others have of you three do not force situations and this will solidify your new mindset that you are good and complete and content on your own your life is perfect because you actively create it and you don't need any one or thing to come and save you

from it four uncertainty is reality into is time to accept that you can't control the outcome to every single situation things end the events we plan might not follow suit people don't act in the way that we expected them to but that's okay and that is completely normal five know that everything happens for a reason no matter how much it hurts in the moment or even a year down the line it still happens within your favor every lost friendship opportunity person or event is still working within your favor this is really about detaching from the

temporary sad moments by realizing that Solutions will always emerge for you and finally six embrace it embrace the mistakes embrace the loss the pain the uncertainty the negative spectrum of emotions you go through the bad days because that's what life is all about and instead of victimizing yourself and always thinking why is this happening to me which is attachment to expectations you detach by instead saying what is this trying to teach me because you know that the universe will The World God whatever you believe in is working within your favor you are no longer taking

things personally because now it's not about life attacking you or you have such a hard life or you're someone lucky no because things always work out in your favor so if something bad happens you know that is a lesson that needs to be learned from this and this is gonna help me move on to the next phase of my life and help me grow into the person that I'm meant to be and flourish and I'm so grateful for that so I'm not going to beat myself up about it so many people ask but is Detachment

healthy how do you still have a strong connection with people when is the right time for it how do you find buyers in being detached girl so many people have so many different misconceptions about what being detached is and I'm here to debunk all of them for example yeah but how do I become detached in a positive way and not turn cold or happy with a person's feelings or not feel guilty for being detached why are you feeling guilty for being detached it's not a bad thing it's not about turning cold it's not about being

negative and it's not about not having strong connections with other people who has been teaching you all of these things Detachment is very healthy in all aspects not only just for you but for everybody else involved and this is why love love without attachment is the purest kind of love because when you understand that you're bond with another person could end at any given moment and that they could betray you and break your heart at any given moment but you still decide to take the jump and open your heart to them and care for them

and invest your time and energy into your relationship with them knowing that you might not get anything in return because they are fully in their right to turn around and leave you and you are fully in your right to turn around and leave them when they are no longer serving you or aligning with you but you still stay in the moment because you value that energy and their character that much that is love like wow just wow you are fully aware and okay with the fact that they could hurt you but you still stay but

on the other hand Society has normalized this version of Love which values attachment and has normalized it to be super romantic the whole oh but I can't live without you and nobody else compares to you and you're irreplaceable and I could never be without you nobody could compare to you you are my other half no none of that is true an attachment comes around a piece of need and Desperation so why do we get attached in the first place let's dive into that for a second we don't get attached to people to form a strong

emotional connection with them because you can do that when you're detached we get attached to people because we are using them to fulfill one of our emotional needs that we have not taught ourselves to do yet maybe this is because we were abandoned or hurt and there's a hole in our heart or just a piece of us missing and we are now using other people to come in and save us and fix that wound for us we attach to other people and use them as our new safe place whereas people who are detached and have

done the inner work and healing simply don't need to attach because they have learned to become their own safe place and this is why you need to start going against everyone else's belief that attachment in love is normal and cute because it most definitely is not and truthfully I could say to all of the loved ones in my life my family my friends whoever I'm dating I could say I am okay without you I could leave you and create a great life for myself I could find new people who maybe I could align with even

better that's because I Know Myself and I know what I need to have a great life and it most definitely is in other people and even though I have all of that knowledge that even if I left you I could heal and be fully content I still choose to stay here and be with you why because it's out of want not need you can be deeply involved with someone love them with your whole heart care for them devote your time and energy into them and still be detached and a lot of people don't know that

the key is that you can be deeply involved but not entangled everyone thinks it's mean or cold or coming from a place of like resentment or deep hurt or trauma when really Detachment in its Essence is literally only letting go of any emotions or thoughts that create suffering for me for example oh my God what if they leave me oh my God what am I gonna do without them what if they cheat on me what about the mistake come on two years ago what have I found that cast no no when those thoughts come in

they're gonna come in they're normal and I'm gonna allow them to pass through without spending so much time dwelling on them and allowing them to Define who I am and what my reality is so for example if I have just started dating somebody sure I care about you and I'm gonna show up to the dates I'm gonna plan nice things first and all of that but am I worried about what your opinion is of me or whether you like me or what I can do to impress you more no I am detached I'm fine because

even if you don't like me even if I am giving off a bad impression that's cool then leave because you know why I'm gonna be fine when that day comes that's all it is but in the process in the present where we are now I'm still giving you all of my time love and energy AKA it is always the right time to be detached and Detachment is the perfect balance in life and right here I just want to give a quick mention to if you are scared of being judged for being detached then you better

cut that person off right away because I hope by everything I've said so far in this video you understand being detached is a good healthy loving thing that you were also doing for everybody else in your life and if somebody is trying to make you feel bad about doing that that is not a good person to have in your life in fact they might be Overly Attached dependent and needy and then feel offended as a result that you are not equally trying to get into with them when in reality all you're doing is trying to

protect your peace and if they don't respect that or think that that's honorable bye bye Detachment is simply being cautious of what you're pouring your energy into it is not being cold it is you being responsible over your heart first of all don't beat yourself up for falling back into Old patterns it's only natural when you're making a big change in your life for now please give yourself a pat on the back for wanting to make the change in the first place and level up your life you go girl but my main step for practicing

Detachment and staying consistent with it is one to start a new goal or hobby because in this you become so passionate and so involved in something that in that stage you can start testing yourself and your limit for example testing yourself to make sure that that new goal or work or whatever doesn't start defining your worth and you're still detached from it while you're also still enjoying it and I actually think generally helps with this a lot to see the origin of where your irrational thoughts are coming from for example some people think owning material

things will Define their success or that having good grades defines their intelligence and it's limiting beliefs that those which makes us live in a lack mindset and constantly be attached to external things and once you actually journal and understand the origin of your attachment you can then set limits in those particular activities to start practicing Detachment instead so for me I was very overly attached to other people relationships and friendships so I started solidating and spending a lot of time on my own so that I could signal to my brain that I was perfectly content

in my life and that other people had no control or significant hold over me another example is recently I've grown very overly attached to my daily work and my career so me setting limits is I have a habit tracker on my phone and I make sure I have balance in my life so I'm not attaching and committing all of my time and energy into work because that's not healthy so the first hour of my day is spent exercising in the gym that is a non-negotiable within my habit tracker I have a few things to tick

off every day that are non-work tasks like eating a healthy meal like journaling even like calling a friend like I have to take that off and that's me being disciplined taking control back over my own life and knowing where my triggers are which is me being attached to my work and then setting limits in place to avoid me falling into that trap so that in the process I am practicing Detachment so before we move into chapter two here are some Detachment affirmations I have everything I need in this moment What's meant to be will always

find a way my desires are always seeking me out so it's safe for me to let them go and Trust the process I am okay with whichever way the situation goes because everything always happens in my best interest I am aware of my feelings without letting them control me I am not strict on my idea of how everything should be other people and myself can flow freely and I let go of all expectations I focus on my own energy and my own life I choose to be free from the good and bad opinions of others

and finally I release the need to judge or criticize chapter 2 detached while dating easy all you have to do is give dry responses when you're texting leave before you get left never let them see you her always acting different know that you can never trust anyone and all always mentally prepare yourself for the worst case scenario every single day girl that is the most toxic advice ever and that's what everybody thinks it means to be detached when dating and let me tell you that is so far from the truth please do not follow any

of that advice the following advice I'm about to give applies to dating situationships relationships marriages breakups hooking up romanticizing someone you name it it applies to anything under the dating umbrella so the rule for this chapter is Letting Go you are stuck in an energy of a lack scarcity and fear and this is a low vibrational energy which repels anything you are chasing after therefore you need to let go of chasing in order to actually attract what you want and what you deserve you need to reach a mindset where you genuinely don't care if somebody's

taking a while to text you back or they're being distant or they're not giving you enough attention and the mindset has helped me get to this place is the following a person is only ever asked to experience and we should be grateful for the limited amount of time we get with them we are not entitled to their love time care affection or them being with us us forever so I only focus on enjoying the experience with them rather than worrying about the outcome of what it will be because I know I like this person so

I'm so grateful to have the blessing of being able to experience that energy in the present moment because I don't know how long I'll have it for and that's okay because everything in life is temporary and in the process of having that mindset I'm detaching myself from the thought processes of oh my God we're going to be boyfriend and girlfriend oh my God we're going to be together forever and all of this worrying about where it's gonna go we only ever have ourselves and this is why I stress self-love and solo dating so much because

that way when things don't work out we are happy to come back home to ourselves Nothing in life is ours but ourselves eventually we lose everything but we were meant to experience it anyway to get the lesson that it came with so that we could grow into the people that we were always meant to be Detachment AKA being okay with the loss is the realest type of love because that shows that you're not with someone for your own gain and advantage to heal your own wounds and then there are other people all who just cannot

detach from situationships people who have ghosted them cheated on them they're always checking their ex's Instagram stories obsessing over their Crush can you hear yourself like actually can you hear yourself because when did it become so normalized to commit so much time to obsessing over other people I get it you like them and they liked you too and you probably shared really nice memories together and they probably make you feel some type of way that you've never felt for anybody else ever before but this is still not okay and not normal like if you were

genuinely curious and you were asking me how do I stop obsessing over them how do I stop wanting to check their Instagram stories all the time you just stop I hate to be that guy okay and I know I give a lot of magic formulas to everything but when it comes to this there is no magic formula except to have some self-control because if you've learned anything so far from everything I've taught you on Detachment in this video it's that the only thing we can control is ourselves and you must relinquish your need to control

everything else okay you can't control whether they're gonna text you back whether they like you back whether they're treating you by or you can control role is your action in this scenario so if you are sick of wanting to constantly check their Instagram stories you are now going to practice discipline and put limits in place for yourself to help you start the process of you detaching I.E block them if you have a finsta account to try and stalk people or stalk your ex delete that you are literally allowing yourself to get entangled in this person

and continue this obsessive attachment I've taught you what Detachment is I've taught you the principles of the law you know what it is you now have to show up for yourself and admit I know what the right decision is but I am in denial because I'm attached and I clearly don't want to let go please be honest with yourself I think another hugely important principle when it comes to dating and staying detached is not falling in love with the idea of someone stop fixating on people it's not normal the only person you should be obsessed

with is yourself whether you're in love with the idea of someone and their potential because you've just started to get to know them or you could be in love with the idea of someone long after they've exited your life and you're still romanticizing an ex or a situationship first of all still thinking about people long after is not a sign of how deep your love was with them or how much you cared about them the only thing that's a sign of is that you are not okay on your own and you need to fix up

with that because a lot of the time we romanticize and we build up this version of somebody in our head because it makes us feel better about ourselves and it creates this idea of someone that's going to come and save us but that is not true and that is another form of you being in denial and just to push this belief further into your head I want to say love doesn't hurt love doesn't portray us okay we shouldn't try and quit finding love it's the attachment is what hurts us and breaks our heart our attachment

to the idea of what that situation should have been is what hurts us when you let go of that and you practice Detachment and you still fall in love with people and you have deep and meaningful connections with them but you simply do not prioritize trying to figure out what this situation is supposed to be and instead you freely flow alongside it and all of your attention is in the present moment rather than the past or the future there will be significantly less hurt and lastly I want to finish this chapter off with talking about

why guys detach easier than women a lot of people have this belief but it's actually not true now a lot of people might answer this by saying guys can detach much more easily than women because women are more emotional men act more on logic which yes technically is true but it's also still false because men aren't detaching men or just pros at suppressing their feelings acting like they're okay when they are very much not okay women will cry out they'll feel their feelings okay they'll act like a hot mess right now but then six months

down the line they'll be fine they'll be healed they would have moved on men suppress their feelings over and over and over and that's why they randomly come back into your life three years down the line because they never heal they never do the inner work okay they put on this Detachment front but men don't know how to do that for the most part so let's not look at them to be examples for us and I also want to use this as an opportunity to say don't see Detachment as I need to bury my feelings

down and be cold like I said at the beginning of the video it's still giving people your heart and still communicating things and expressing your emotions that is okay and that is allowed it's putting in the habits and putting in the practice of letting go of control to every outcome chapter three the importance of Detachment when manifesting I spoke about this briefly in my lucky girl syndrome video and there was some confusion around it and I'm here to clear all of that up now one of the things I said is that visualization is a very

powerful tool in manifesting your dream life for example every night before you fall asleep and you're on your pillow and you're closing your eyes literally just imagine every single night this is who I'm gonna be what I'm gonna look like I'm going to dress what my work life is going to be like my weekends my family all of that right but a lot of people thought about how do I do that and also be detached that means I'm thinking about it all the time I'm obsessing right no because you can vision board your dream life

you can write down your goals you can work towards them every day you can imagine them every night before you go to sleep and you can still be detached because you are not worrying about but how is it going to become a reality how am I going to make it happen but what if this what if that I don't have these tools this isn't realistic but am I actually going to get that get rid of all of those questions you were too attached to it you can think about it all the time and work towards

your goals and still be detached because you are releasing all of that control putting it out into the universe and knowing all of your desires are going to come to you because they seek you out just as much as you seek them out the Detachment rule for this chapter is making room you are giving the universe space to work in your favor and bring all of your desires to you you are surrendering your plans to the higher power knowing that things always work out for you another amazing way to manage the person I've been doing

this for years is by journaling you can either buy a play notebook and script out your manifestations or you could actually buy a guided manifestation Journal this is the one that I've been using recently okay look how gorgeous this is the quality though and the pages inside literally guides you week by week with practical exercises to allow you to manifest it's called manifest by purses who has kindly sponsored this video there'll be more information in the description for you guys to check out um I've literally just been using this for the last week or so

my favorite thing about this journal is that every page is so detailed and offers you something different and it's structured week by week and you know you have your inner check-ins which I've done you have your mental health check-in which is so useful alongside trying to manifest and I actually discovered a lot of useful manifestation techniques through this journal which I'd never even heard of before so it's very helpful in actually manifesting my desires and this is what I mean you can put in the time and effort to journal consistently in order to manifest your

desires and do all of these useful exercises while still knowing you are detached because you you know I'm gonna put in five minutes every night to do some journaling go to sleep and no now that I've done that exercise I deserve my desires they're going to come to me I don't have to worry about how it's going to come to fruition and it's just so practical and easy and it's literally every manifesting method you need all in one book and finally chapter four emotional Detachment in every other scenario in your life whether it's family friends

strangers the opinions of others detaching from your past your future you name it the rule to detach from this is all about awareness it's knowing you're not distancing yourself from people you are simply freeing your energy from being drained by obsessing about that outcome you are no longer in a desperate state of mind so let's start with detaching from our past and our future a lot of us are heavily attached to our past especially the mistakes we've made beating ourselves up for things we've done wrong in the past many of us are so haunted by

previous versions of ourselves I know for me I was for so long in fact I would regularly view myself as the version of of myself from six years ago even though I'm not that vision of myself anymore just because I had so much trauma around it and I was literally constantly envisioning my past life rather than living in the present moment and there are a few ways I got past this number one read the book The Power of Now this is the number one resource you need to learn about how to detach and stay in

the present moment if you go to the description my Amazon is linked in there and it will be my book recommendations list honestly it's a best-selling book for a reason number two every single day when I wake up I act like it's the first day of my life meaning when I wake up I say to myself if this was the first day of my life with all of the things I've learned the wisdom I have the people I have in my life my achievements even my belongings what would I act like who would I be

how much confidence would I have right so much more but because when you don't think like that and when you are harboring all of these past negative memories from your past it weighs you down and it lowers your confidence and that's where a lot of your self-doubt comes from as well and here's the thing that helped me the most and a lot of people don't realize it the past is not real it doesn't exist the only thing that life is is a collection of present moments and that is it we literally only ever had the

present tomorrow which is the future right now when I'm experiencing it that is the present I will never be able to actually experience the future or go back and change things in the past and by constantly reminding myself of that I was finally able to kind of make my peace with it and realize all I have is this present moment this one second this second is gonna pass so quickly what is everything I can do to make this the best second the best minute the best hour and by realizing that time is so fleeting why

would I waste the few present moments that I have because life is so short by being concerned about a time that no longer exists and I'm never gonna get access to ever again another very important principle of this is staying grounded don't let your ego take control when it comes to oh but I need to be at a certain place in the future and if I'm not then I'm not a good person I'm not successful or that's not going to Define my worth in the way I want it to similarly looking at the past and

thinking oh my God I can't believe I did that that was so cringe and like scolding your past self the past version of you doesn't deserve that the past version of you no matter what they did they were acting on their level of awareness they had at that moment in time and also everything they did back then got you to where you are now so in fact you should be thanking them for all of their failure strengths and weaknesses and finally Detachment when it comes to other people their opinions of us that are proof lovers

let's talk about parents for instance of course all we ever want to do is get our parents approval and make them proud of us but that can be very problematic in the long run so how do we detach from that when we've literally been raised to chase that approval and my answer to this is to finally put worth and value to yourself and attach to your own sense of approval and validation every single rule law principle that I've mentioned on Detachment applies to this section of the video and dealing with other people as well so

all I'm gonna say for this final part of the video is you are so concerned with other people's opinions of you and you were always trying to chase others approval of you because once again you are looking for emotional fulfillment outside of yourself until you do the work work and you come back home to yourself and you give yourself that love and approval you are constantly going to be in a state of chasing it from other people because you were so attached to external circumstances you need to start attaching to yourself in order to become

detached from everything and everyone else for example you don't like what I'm doing that's fine because I'm attached to myself in the way that no matter what anybody else says I sat down and I've had the conversation with myself I have scripted and journaled my goals and who I want to become and where I want to go in life that I am so fully aware of who I am that nobody can shake that all of the disapproval in the world could not shake that because I know myself too much I'm too comfortable with myself I

love myself too much I also know to never take anything personally a lot of the times our parents try to push us onto a certain path of success or certain things to do because they're acting on their own ego and I am very aware of that just as if my friend was disapproving of me or a stranger didn't get what I was up to that's fine no one's ever going to fully understand me so why why would I attach to that opinion of me because it's invalid it's irrelevant to my life no one in this

life can determine my Worth or what I should do other than myself because I am the only person on this planet that actually 100 knows myself everybody else's opinions and approval is just a combination of their own projections Trauma Life Lessons and mindset that's got nothing to do with me so why would I ever listen to it and that mindset right there reminding myself of that every day is detachments and that brings us to the end of this video I hope you guys enjoyed it if you did make sure you like and leave a comment

down below and don't forget to join our Discord server it will be linked in the description there's actually a channel on there where you can talk to me directly and send me any video requests you have so make sure you join it and also connect with so many other like-minded women we have the most positive vibes on that Discord and also don't forget to follow sajana Studio on Instagram because my brand is launching very soon and I don't want you guys to miss out that's all for now I'll see you guys in the next video

thank you so much for watching I appreciate you bye