it makes I think it's probably good for us to break up but I just love you so much I listened to Agony a couple more times in it it seemed to help today's the first day and I'm going on a walk I couldn't get out of bed for like 40 minutes because I was I just need someone to like talk to I don't feel that great I mean I don't know I don't know if it's the breakup that's making me this way or because of how Reliant I was and just socializing with my [Music] girlfriend
I did promise her that I wasn't going to text her until at least 6 months I told her I would only text her if I was ready and I was like moved on and I don't know if that'll be the case so I hang out with some friends and got Korean barbecue which [Music] helped it is day five um today was the first day that I didn't like cry immediately after getting up which is nice I went to the gym I feel good it's officially been 1 week since the breakup yesterday I was this close
to texting her it's day eight I feel kind of like today today is day nine I think still feel pretty shitty I just feel so stupid I feel like I lost something or someone in my life that was absolutely special to me I kept waking up in the middle of the night um and then immediately thinking about ex thinking that there's no way that she's actually gone all right so today's day 13 I forgot to film something yesterday um but I think that's a good thing I would have been happy with her I don't know
we would have been happy together I tried to call someone right now um my friend but she's in class and I really almost wanted to like text her today which I know is so bad I just I love her so much I really I really hope we can make something work out I didn't do yesterday I was hanging out with friends and then most of the day I was hanging out with friends he was literally perfect tomorrow's Thanksgiving I'm going to miss her so much on Thanksgiving I literally I I don't understand how it's only
been 23 days I I I committed the dreaded action of texting her I adore you the sound of your [Music] skin I've been kind of a little bit more accepting of the potential fact that we're not going to get back together and that you know I think though I'm kind of realizing that like at this point there's nothing I could do about at least I know now that if we were ever ever get back [Music] together that I would fight for the relationship like till the day I die I know that for a [Music] fact
and it's good it's good to have learned this you know I just wish I just wish I'd learned it when I still had the chance to to be there for her when she needed me listening to Island Song from Adventure Time and that sh on me in my feelings today was a really good day um but I think I am approaching the the acceptance phase for sure not feeling good today at all thinking about her the whole time and I wasn't able to be like present [Music] today I just I just miss her you know
I just miss her a lot um it's now been officially actly 2 months since we broke up 2024 off to a shitty ass [Music] start yeah [Music] yeah my last check in I think I've been [Music] doing what are we doing Francis stuck in the middle of the ocean there's only one way out the sun anything to say to the viewers I'm the best oh okay it went [Music] up but I've been like seriously debating like just taking a break from school cuz I was about to start up [Music] school my shoes are pretty money
it's definitely tolerable it's getting considerably worse welcome to drg uh in conquer here's the kilter super cool stuff you should check it out over here watch The Crying in the raain to uh Tech it it is Valentine's Day it sucks I wish I had my baby with me I miss her a lot I'm listening to the CU Lab podcast episode on [Applause] depression [Music] I around my can't stop thinking of you I want so [Music] nice now what's up Gamers it's your boy gamer got 8 I haven't done one of these check-in videos in a
long time I would say I mean I'm feeling a lot better compared to like you know 1 month two months in on it and that I am hoping I want let my can't stoping 4 and 1 half months or so um since I broke up with my girlfriend and I still miss her and we were together for 3 years and so it makes sense I feel the way I feel yeah do it faster faster faster faster [Music] [Music] we said deuces to the job I mean the manager pretty much knew that but feel a little
bit bad CU my communication could have been better my date just took me to her lab she's like in another room right now dude that's so good [Music] but it's officially been basically 6 months since uh my girlfriend and I broke up and I'm in godamn it Mexico okay I'm in godamn it Mexico I mean I've processed so much at this point thankfully I mean I still very much miss her I was 100% this is the worst breakup I'd ever gone through um but I learned so much from the relationship it was really nice relationship
and I wouldn't I could never ever regret the time that I spent with her and I definitely think that just because of the sheer intensity of the breakup and how much it affected me emotionally I think I'm kind of developing like an understanding that like hey like I'm okay on my own things will be all right as much as I do like having relationships and stuff fostering healthy relationships is important and is something I value I think it's just like I think this this period of time has made me develop a stronger sense of security
and now I'm more prepared than ever for the next thing I think towards the end of this documentation process I started recording way less and less in terms of like check-ins and stuff um but I think it only makes sense because I started to process emotions and I think when I started this process I was still kind of unpacking everything and really really going through it emotionally things are much better I'm working on myself I'm climbing a ton I'm in the best shape of My Life um which I think is really good I think it
did it did definitely prompt me the Break Up to focus on myself and understand the importance of caring for yourself just generally learning how to become a better person and I think in a lot of ways that's one of the best things that can come out of a breakup is kind of like how do I essentially turn myself into a better partner in for the future um and how do I become a better person in the so uh it was definitely a rough 6 months but I learned a lot from it um and we're still
processing we're still growing so yeah see what the future holds a hole of light through the Big Top tent up high here before and after me shineing down on me tell me if I could send up my heart to you so when I die which I must do Could It Shine Down here with you it's my love is mine all I love my my nothing in the world belongs to me but my
