Hi how are you feeling how is it to live in your body you feel tired and worry a lot don't deny it I know you do but why do you think you are put on this planet to suffer 90% of the time and only have a few good moments here and there that doesn't seem right does it the truth is that you can be at peace Almost 100% of the time have high energy and live a relaxed life the question is why don't you there are two daily habits that can ruin your life they are
clinging and resisting if those words sound abstract think of them as liking and disliking they seem harmless at first but they are at the source of all of your sufferings let me explain how here is what clinging looks like imagine a butterfly landing on your arm it's beautiful and you enjoy the way it feels it's amazing to watch this delicate creature so close but then it flies away the butterfly is gone but you cling to that feeling it left behind now you want more butterflies this is clinging now let's look at resisting imagine you see
a big hairy spider under your table it terrifies you maybe you freeze up or run away and from that moment on you avoid anything that even slightly resembles a spider the image of that spider that sense of fear stays stuck in your mind now anytime you encounter anything that looks like a spider you will avoid it this is resisting look butterflies and spiders are just theoretical examples but you have hundreds of similar experiences that run your life for example a certain kind of car a certain type of house or a particular girlfriend or boyfriend are
your butterflies they made you feel good once and now you chase them everywhere you also have spiders that you work hard to avoid for instance maybe a certain type of teacher embarrassed you in class and now you dislike anyone who just looks like that teacher or you had a bad argument with the close friend that ended badly now you resist any form of Confrontation even when something bothers you you stay silent just like these examples you have hundreds of butterflies and spiders and they run your life this sounds absurd but here's what you did unconsciously
you said to yourself I like butterflies but I don't like spiders so here is how the world in front of me needs to be so that I feel good you decided how everyone and everything around you should be from the weather to your son's grades to how your wife should dress to what kind of car you should drive now when life shows up in ways you dislike you you think the solution is to prevent it from coming that way again and when something nice comes along you think the solution is to make it come again
you are saying that for me to feel good life needs to come this way but not that way so you collected a bunch of garbage from your past and built a system don't get offended most of it is really garbage because a big portion of your system is built out of resentments and bad memories and it is this system that runs your life you're not seeing life clearly as it happens you're looking at it through foggy lenses imagine you're watching the news on TV and when the news is finished you turn it off but a
Frozen picture stays on the screen next time you come back to watch a movie you still see the picture from the news covering half of your screen you hear the dialogue and see parts of the action but everything is distorted by that lingering image from the news that's what happens when you resist and cling every experience has energy anytime you cling or resist they get stuck and the system gets bigger and harder to manage you stop experiencing life as it is and start demanding how life should be I hope this Rings The Alarm bells for
you because life has nothing to do with you you have no control over it to put this into perspective take a look at this small dot in the image this is Earth photographed by the Voyager One telescope Earth is a tiny Rock spinning in an endless void when you see this vastness does it make sense to demand that the Universe align with your preferences you're here to experience life and let go not to cling to one thing and push away another this is why life feels like a struggle imagine standing in the wind with two
boards in your hands you push one against the wind and grip the other tightly so it doesn't blow away this is this is what clinging and resisting look like and it's exhausting clinging and resisting are at the root of all your suffering if you analyze your worries you'll notice two things you either worry that you will not get what you want butterflies or you worry that you'll get what you don't want spiders if clinging and resisting cause suffering then what's the solution surrender surrender isn't giving up being passive or letting others step over you it's
about experiencing each moment fully then letting it go good or bad Pleasant or unpleasant imagine standing in that wind again but this time you're not holding on to anything you let the wind flow around and through you you realize how easy it is to be in the wind it's the same in life when you let go of clinging and resisting you free up the energy spent on managing your mental system suddenly life no longer feels like a struggle you're not exhausted from hard work you're exhausted from maintaining this system now you're probably wondering how do
I Surrender how do I find more peace and energy in my daily life here are eight practical tips by the way I don't want these tips to sound like I am some spiritually awakened person giving you advice I'm probably struggling as much if not more than you are I discovered these tips to help myself and I hope they help you too Number One release past resentments and anger some of you watching will say what are you talking about I can't Just Surrender and let go you don't know what my childhood was like my dad used
to beat my mom every day so I feel justified in expressing my anger look I'm truly sorry if you had to go through that but let's look at it honestly holding on to anger no matter how Justified is like carrying garbage with you every time you express it you are polluting your own environment if you want to let it out so badly okay go ahead do it and see what happens it will create a chain reaction that will end up hurting you and the people you love the most by the way suppressing those emotions doesn't
work either it's like putting a lid on a Boiling Pot it's going to explode and fighting it that's like playing tug of war against the 10 strongest men on Earth I don't care what technique you use you're not going to win instead the moment those emotions rise say to yourself okay here's my old friend coming up again stay present and relax your neck shoulders chest and legs let it come up without reacting shoving it down or taking it out on others when you allow them to flow without attaching to them they'll start to release naturally
believe me your body wants to release them your body wants to clean itself it consumes so much energy to carry them around you just need to allow it which emotion should you let go of first whichever comes up first the second it surfaces relax and let it go it won't be comfortable I know it was stored with pain it will be released with pain if it comes up 100 times a day Let It Go 100 times welcome the discomfort rather than pushing it away breathe deeply and relax into it allow it to pass through still
not convinced let me ask you this this if something was 100% cost to you and 0% benefit would you still keep it that's what holding on to past resentments does it's 100% cost 0% benefit number two don't let new frustrations get in it takes 1 second to get in but 20 years to get out relax and let go as soon as they rise let it pass through without touching for example you've got a last minute change in plans and frustration is bubbling up recognize it as soon as it hits you it's okay to feel frustrated
but you don't need to hold on to it you have the habit of collecting bad experiences some people collect coins but you collect bad experiences and store them in your body let me ask you this if you went outside now and collected the most disgusting and SM smelly things and brought them to your house what would happen well it's obvious you would never do such a thing so why are you storing those experiences in your body you didn't know you were doing this but now you do so stop it number three handling daily frustrations you're
in a store and you're running late the line isn't moving and frustration is bubbling up you can feel it you're getting upset notice that frustration instead of reacting acknowledge how you feel relax your shoulders hands chest and legs say to yourself this is my chance to practice patience think of it as a mini exercise in surrendering to what you can't control it's amazing how quickly frustration can turn into calm when you let go number four stop controlling things when things don't go as planned there's often an urge to control or manipulate notice that urge accept
that you can't control everything remind yourself that things won't always align with your preferences trust that things will work out even if not exactly as you planned number five be patient with family members feel like you need your family to do things a certain way to feel at peace remind yourself they're on their own path just like you are relax the tension around your heart and chest appreciate them as they are even if they're not fitting into your expectations number six illusion of achieving material things let go of thinking that once you reach a certain
position or once you graduate or get that job you will finally start feeling peace it will never happen 5 years ago you said you would feel happy today if only you achieved certain goals today you have them today you're living the life that was a dream 5 years ago do you feel at peace now probably not it won't be much different in the next 5 years number seven don't take things personally most people unconsciously think that life is giving them a hard time on purpose or life could give them more but it doesn't give it
of course nobody says this out loud but when you listen to their words you can sense it for example they say things like why do these bad things happen to me all the time why doesn't life leave me alone I'm the good guy and I do all those good things but I get nothing in return life is just that life it is flowing and has nothing to do with you so stop personalizing things number eight training the animal you are not an animal but you live in an animal body you have to train it to
obey you the simplest way is meditation look I honestly hate meditation I have more interesting things to do I also hate brushing my teeth exercising and taking showers but guess what we must do them if it helps see meditation as taking a shower to clean the inner body 10 minutes in the morning and night is enough if 10 minutes feels too much then simply be conscious while doing small daily activities for example while washing your hands in the morning stay aware smell the soap feel the water's touch on your hands and face feel the softness
of the towel this one simple practice each day can be more powerful than taking the best course on spirituality and wellbeing and remember getting good at surrendering doesn't mean life will stop giving you problems you'll still have problems probably even bigger ones but what will change is your reaction to those problems and that's a huge evolutionary shift this alone can eliminate 95% of your suffering you will also unleash a huge amount of energy that was once used to manage your system you'll start to enjoy life and feel peaceful even in tough times before we wrap
up I want to mention that the insights in this video aren't mine they belong to Michael Singer one of my favorite spiritual authors I read his book and took his course and I felt compelled to share some of what I learned with you if you're interested the book is titled the untethered soul and the course is living from a place of surrender I'll leave links in the description thanks for watching
