Wife's Divorced Friends Convinced Her to Run a Fake Affair "Prank" on Me to "Test" Me and Make Me...

wife's divorced friends convinced her to run a fake affair prank on me to test me and make me more attentive, but it backfired spectacularly on them when I chose to file for divorce instead. So, my wife Sarah and I have been married for 8 years, and things have been good. Not perfect, but good.

We both work full-time jobs, and we've got our routines and our weekend plans and date nights, maybe once a month, when we're not too tired from work, and I thought we were doing fine. Maybe not like honeymoon phase fine, but normal married couple fine where you're comfortable with each other and don't need to be all over each other every second of the day. But apparently Sarah's been talking to her divorced friends about our marriage and they've been filling her head with all this garbage about how I'm not attentive enough and not romantic enough and how she needs to make me fight for her or some ridiculous nonsense like that.

And I'm finding all this out after the fact, which makes it even worse because while I'm going through literal hell, thinking my wife is cheating on me, she's planning this whole elaborate scheme with her bitter friends who can't stand that someone else might actually have a decent marriage. It started about 6 weeks ago when Sarah began acting different, like really different. She was suddenly working late all the time and coming home with this guilty look on her face, but also kind of excited and secretive.

And when I'd ask her about her day, she'd get all vague and change the subject. and she started dressing nicer for work and taking longer getting ready in the morning and putting on perfume when she never used to wear perfume to work before. At first, I thought maybe she was planning a surprise for me or something because our anniversary is coming up in a few months.

But then she started getting texts at weird hours and she'd grab her phone real quick when it buzzed and turn it face down. And when I asked who was texting her so late, she'd say it was just work stuff or her sister, but she'd get all flustered and defensive about it. Then there was the night she came home at almost midnight and said she'd been out with the girls, but she smelled like men's cologne and her lipstick was smudged.

And when I asked her about it, she said she must have hugged someone goodbye, but she couldn't look me in the eye when she said it. And I'm not an idiot. I know what it looks like when someone's been kissing someone else.

I started paying more attention after that, and the signs just kept piling up. She was taking phone calls in the other room and hanging up quick when I walked in. She was doing laundry more often and being weird about it, like she didn't want me to see certain clothes.

She was showering as soon as she got home from work, which she never used to do. And she kept mentioning this new guy at her office named Jake, and how funny he was and how he'd helped her with some project. The Jake thing really got to me because she'd bring him up in conversation, but then catch herself and change the subject.

And when I asked her more about him, she'd get all weird and say he was just a coworker, but she'd already told me too much about him for him to be just some random coworker. Like she'd mentioned that he drives a motorcycle and that he's recently divorced and that he's really into rock climbing and all these personal details that you don't usually know about random co-workers. I tried talking to her about how distant she'd been acting.

And she just brushed me off and said I was being paranoid and that she was just stressed about work and tired and needed some space. But the more space I gave her, the worse it got and the more obvious it became that something was going on. And I'm not the type of person to just stick my head in the sand and pretend everything's fine when it's clearly not.

The breaking point was 2 weeks ago when she said she was going to dinner with her sister. But then I saw her sister at the grocery store and when I mentioned that Sarah was supposed to be with her, her sister got this confused look and said she hadn't made any plans with Sarah. And that's when I knew for sure that she was lying to me and probably meeting up with this Jake guy.

I confronted her when she got home that night and asked her point blank if she was having an affair. And she got all upset and started crying and saying how could I think that about her and that she loved me and would never cheat on me. But she still couldn't explain where she'd actually been or why she'd lied about being with her sister.

And when someone can't give you a straight answer about something that simple, you know they're hiding something big. I didn't sleep at all that night, and I kept thinking about all the signs and all the lies and how she'd been treating me like an idiot for weeks. And I realized that I couldn't keep living like this, wondering every day if my wife was being faithful to me or not.

And I decided that I needed to either find out the truth or end things because this limbo was killing me. So, I started planning to hire a private investigator because I needed proof before I did anything drastic. I didn't hire one.

And I was researching divorce lawyers online just to know my options. And I was honestly preparing myself for the worst case scenario where I'd have to start my whole life over because my wife had been cheating on me with some motorcycle riding rock climber from her office. But then last Tuesday, everything changed and I found out the truth, but in the worst possible way.

Sarah's friend Lisa called me completely drunk and rambling about how proud she was of Sarah for finally taking their advice and making me jealous and how it was working so well because I was finally paying attention to Sarah again. And I had no idea what she was talking about. So I asked her to explain and that's when the whole thing came out.

Apparently Sarah and her divorced friends Lisa and Monica and Jennifer had been planning this whole fake affair thing for months as a way to make me more attentive and romantic. and they'd convinced Sarah that the best way to get a man to appreciate what he has is to make him think he might lose it, which is the most twisted logic I've ever heard in my life. Lisa told me that they'd even helped Sarah come up with all the details about Jake, who apparently is a real coworker, but Sarah's never even had a conversation with him beyond basic work stuff.

And they'd been coaching her on how to act suspicious and secretive to make me think she was cheating. And they thought it was hilarious that their plan was working so well and that I was finally acting like a jealous husband who was fighting for his wife. I hung up on Lisa and just sat there for like an hour trying to process what I just heard and I went through every emotion you can imagine.

First, I was relieved because she wasn't actually cheating. Then I was confused because why would someone do this to their spouse? Then I got angrier than I've ever been in my entire life because I realized that my wife had been torturing me for weeks on purpose.

When Sarah got home that night, I told her that Lisa had called and spilled everything. And I watched her face go white. And then she started crying and apologizing and saying it had just been a silly joke and that she never meant for it to go so far and that she was going to tell me the truth soon anyway.

But I was so angry I could barely speak and I told her that pretending to cheat on your husband isn't a joke, it's emotional abuse. She kept trying to explain how her friends had convinced her that our marriage was getting stale and that I was taking her for granted and that she just wanted me to show her more attention and appreciation. And she said that the plan had worked because I had been more affectionate and attentive over the past few weeks, which made me even angrier because she was right.

I had been trying harder because I thought I was losing her. I told her that what she'd done was sick and manipulative and that instead of just talking to me about feeling unappreciated, she'd chosen to make me think she was having an affair and watch me suffer for weeks and that I'd lost sleep and lost weight and been miserable every single day thinking that my marriage was falling apart. And she just kept saying she was sorry and that she'd made a mistake.

But here's the thing, and this is what everyone keeps not understanding when I try to explain this to them. It wasn't just a mistake or a bad joke. It was a calculated campaign to mess with my head and my emotions.

And it worked exactly like they planned it to work. Which means Sarah sat there every day watching me be suspicious and worried and jealous. And she knew exactly why I was feeling that way because she was causing it on purpose.

The more I thought about it, the angrier I got because I realized that every time I'd tried to talk to her about how distant she was being, she'd made me feel like I was being paranoid and insecure. And every time I'd asked her about working late or getting mysterious texts, she'd acted like I was being controlling and jealous. when the whole time she knew that her behavior was designed to make me feel exactly that way.

And the worst part is that her friends thought this was funny. They thought it was entertaining to watch me suffer and doubt myself and my marriage. And they were probably talking about me behind my back and laughing about how gullible I was and how well their stupid plan was working.

And Sarah was part of all of this. She was actively participating in making me the butt of their joke. I told Sarah that I needed some time to think, but in reality, I knew I couldn't spend another second in that house.

I spent the next hour blindly throwing my clothes and other personal stuff into bags and boxes. Not knowing how long I'd be gone, I dropped most of it at a nearby storage facility before taking just enough to get by over to my brother's house. While I was there, I couldn't stop thinking about what this meant for our marriage and whether I could ever trust her again.

Because if she could lie to my face for weeks and watch me suffer and think it was justified because her friends told her to do it, then what else might she be capable of? My brother and my parents and even some of my friends think I'm overreacting and that I should forgive her because she wasn't actually cheating and she was just trying to get my attention. But they don't understand what it felt like to live through those weeks thinking that my wife was betraying me and that my marriage was a lie.

And they don't understand that the emotional damage from thinking someone you love is cheating on you is the same. Whether they're actually cheating or just pretending to cheat. I kept imagining her with this Jake guy and wondering what I'd done wrong and how long it had been going on and whether she'd ever really loved me or if she'd just been settling for me until someone better came along.

And I was planning how I'd divide up our stuff and where I'd live and how I'd tell people that my marriage had failed. And all of that mental and emotional torture was completely unnecessary and caused by someone who claims to love me. Thankfully, the only simple part of the logistics was the house since we only rent the apartment and the lease has always been in her name, which meant I was definitely the one who had to leave.

After 4 days at my brother's house, I'd made up my mind. And I went to see a divorce lawyer. And when I told him the whole story, he said he'd never heard anything quite like it, but that emotional abuse and manipulation were definitely grounds for divorce, and that what Sarah had done showed a fundamental lack of respect for me and for our marriage.

I went home and told Sarah that I'd filed for divorce, and she completely lost it, and started screaming and crying and begging me not to leave her, and saying that she'd do anything to make it up to me, and that she'd never listen to her friends again, and that she'd learned her lesson. But I told her that the lesson she should have learned was not to torture your spouse for entertainment. And that's a lesson that adults shouldn't need to learn.

She called her parents and my parents and started this whole campaign to get everyone to convince me to change my mind. And she kept saying that divorce was too extreme and that we should go to counseling and work through this, but I don't want to work through this because I don't want to be married to someone who thinks it's acceptable to emotionally manipulate me and then act like I'm the one being unreasonable when I don't appreciate it. Her friends Lisa and Monica actually had the nerve to call me and tell me I was being too sensitive and that it was just a harmless prank and that Sarah had learned her lesson and wouldn't do anything like this again.

And I told them that if they thought what they'd done was harmless, then they were even more messed up than I'd thought and that they'd probably destroyed my marriage for their own entertainment because they couldn't stand seeing someone else happy when their own relationships had failed. Lisa got really defensive and said that Sarah had been complaining about me not being romantic enough and not paying enough attention to her and that they were just trying to help her get what she needed from her marriage. And I said that if Sarah had problems with our marriage, then she should have talked to me about them instead of conspiring with her bitter friends to play mind games with me.

The thing that really gets me is that Sarah still doesn't seem to understand why what she did was so wrong. She keeps focusing on the fact that she didn't actually cheat and that it was all fake. like that makes it better somehow, but she doesn't seem to grasp that the emotional impact on me was exactly the same as if she had been cheating, and that doing it on purpose actually makes it a bit worse, not better.

I've been staying at my brother's house for 2 weeks now, and Sarah texts me constantly begging me to come home and talk things through. And she sent me this long email about how she realizes she made a mistake, and how she wants to go to marriage counseling and rebuild our trust. But I don't think trust is something that can be rebuilt after something like this because how do I know she won't decide to test me again the next time her friends give her bad advice?

Everyone keeps asking me if I really want to throw away 8 years of marriage over this one incident. But it's not one incident. It's weeks of calculated deception and manipulation.

And it's the realization that my wife thinks so little of me that she'd put me through emotional hell just to see if she could make me jump through hoops for her attention. The divorce papers were served yesterday and Sarah called me sobbing and begging me to reconsider. and she said that she'd cut contact with Lisa and Monica and Jennifer and that she'd do whatever it takes to earn back my trust.

But I told her that the problem isn't her friends. The problem is that she thought what they were suggesting was a good idea in the first place. I know some people think I'm being too harsh and that I should give her another chance.

But I keep thinking about those weeks when I couldn't eat or sleep properly because I was so worried about losing her. And I keep thinking about how she watched me go through that and knew exactly why it was happening and let it continue anyway. And I just can't get past that.

Maybe if she'd come clean after a few days and told me it was all fake, I could have forgiven her. But she let it go on for weeks and she was prepared to let it go on even longer. If Lisa hadn't gotten drunk and spilled the secret and it tells me everything I need to know about what kind of person she really is.

So that's where things stand right now. I'm getting divorced and everyone thinks I'm crazy for leaving my wife over a harmless prank, but I know that what she did wasn't harmless and it wasn't a prank. It was a betrayal of everything that marriage is supposed to be about.

And I'm not going to spend the rest of my life wondering what other tests she might decide to put me through. Ida for divorcing my wife over this because everyone keeps making me feel like I'm the one being unreasonable here. Update one.

Holy crap. I didn't expect this to blow up like it did and I've been reading through all the comments and messages and I have to say that it's been both validating and overwhelming to see so many people who understand why this was such a big deal to me. A lot of people have been asking for more details about what exactly Sarah did during those weeks and how her friends were involved.

So, I'll try to fill in some of the gaps because honestly, writing it all out the first time was kind of therapeutic and helped me process everything that happened. So, Sarah's friend group consists of Lisa, who got divorced 2 years ago after her husband cheated on her with his secretary, Monica, who's been divorced twice and is currently dating some guy she met on a dating app who she complains about constantly, and Jennifer, who separated from her husband last year, and the divorce just got finalized a few months ago. and they meet up every Thursday night for what they call wine night, but what's really just a session where they sit around complaining about men and relationships.

I used to think it was harmless and actually encouraged Sarah to go because she seemed to enjoy it and I figured everyone needs friends and hobbies, but now I realize that these women have been poisoning her against me for months, telling her that I'm too comfortable in our marriage and that I don't appreciate her and that she needs to shake things up to remind me what I could lose. The specific things Sarah did during those six weeks were even worse than I mentioned in my original post. like she started working out more and buying new clothes.

And when I complimented her, she'd act all mysterious and say she was just trying to feel better about herself, which made me think she was trying to look good for someone else. She also started being really critical of me in ways she'd never been before, like commenting on how I dressed for work or suggesting that I needed to get a better haircut or asking why I never planned surprise dates anymore. And at the time, I thought she was just going through some kind of midlife thing, but now I know she was following a script that her friends had given her to make me feel insecure and inadequate.

The phone calls and texts were all fake, too. Lisa and Monica would text her at random times and call her in the evenings so she could act all secretive and guilty. And they'd even research this Jake guy at her office so they could give her realistic details to drop into conversations.

Like they looked him up on social media and found out about his motorcycle and his hobbies. So Sarah would have authentic seeming information to share. But here's the part that really gets me.

Sarah told me that they'd made a whole timeline for this thing. like they'd planned for it to go on for two or three months and they had different phases mapped out where Sarah would gradually escalate the suspicious behavior to make me more and more jealous and desperate to win her back. Phase one was just being distant and secretive.

Phase two was the fake texts and calls and working late. Phase three was supposed to be her actually going out and staying out late and coming home with obvious signs that she'd been with someone else. And phase four was going to be her disappearing for entire nights and letting me think she was having full-blown affairs.

Thank god Lisa got drunk and ruined their plan before they got to phases three and four because I honestly don't know how I would have handled thinking that Sarah was spending nights with another man. I was already barely hanging on just from the stuff she did in phases one and two. Sarah also admitted that they'd been taking pictures and videos of her during this whole thing, like documenting how upset and worried I was getting and how their plan was working.

And they thought it was hilarious that I'd started bringing her flowers and planning date nights because I was trying so hard to save our marriage. That might be the most messed up part of all of this, that they were literally documenting my pain and treating it like entertainment. And Sarah was not only okay with this, but actively participating in it by reporting back to them about how I was reacting to each new lie she told me.

A lot of people in the comments asked if Sarah seemed to enjoy what she was doing or if she seemed conflicted about it. And honestly, looking back, I think she was getting off on the power and control aspect of it. Like, she seemed energized and excited during those weeks in a way that I hadn't seen in years.

And I thought it was because she was falling in love with someone else. But now I think it was because she was enjoying the manipulation. She'd come home from work with this secretive smile and she'd watch me try to figure out what was different about her.

And when I'd ask questions, she'd give me just enough information to keep me guessing, but not enough to actually ease my worries. And there were definitely times when I caught her looking almost amused by how anxious and confused I was. I also found out that her friends had been giving her advice on how to gaslight me.

Like when I confronted her about lying about being with her sister, they'd coached her to turn it around on me and make me feel guilty for not trusting her and for being paranoid and controlling, which is exactly what she did. And when I tried to talk to her about how distant she'd been acting, they told her to make me feel like I was being needy and clingy and that I needed to give her space, which again is exactly what she said to me. So this whole thing was like a coordinated psychological attack designed to make me doubt my own perceptions and feel like I was the problem.

The more details I learn about what they actually did, the angrier I get and the more sure I am that I made the right decision by filing for divorce. Because this wasn't some innocent prank that got out of hand. This was a deliberate campaign to emotionally abuse me for their entertainment.

Sarah has been leaving me voicemails every day begging me to reconsider and promising that she'll never speak to those friends again and that she'll do whatever it takes to make this right. But the damage is done and I don't think there's any coming back from something like this. I've also been getting calls from her parents and even her sister asking me to give Sarah another chance and saying that she's learned her lesson and that everyone makes mistakes.

But this wasn't a mistake. This was a choice that she made every single day for 6 weeks. And she had multiple opportunities to stop it and tell me the truth, but she chose to keep it going.

Her sister actually said that I was being cruel by refusing to even talk to Sarah about working things out. And I told her that what's cruel is watching your spouse suffer and worry and doubt themselves while you know exactly why they're suffering and you're causing it on purpose. The divorce is moving forward and I'm honestly feeling more at peace with my decision every day.

Especially as I learn more about how planned and calculated this whole thing was because I realize now that the woman I thought I married doesn't actually exist. And the real Sarah is someone who thinks it's acceptable to torture the person she claims to love for entertainment. Some people have asked if I'm worried that I'm making a mistake and that I'll regret this later.

But honestly, I feel like I'm finally seeing clearly for the first time in weeks. And what I see is that I deserve better than someone who would do something like this to me. Update two.

Things have gotten even more insane since my last update, and I honestly don't know whether to laugh or scream at this point. But I wanted to give everyone an update because there have been some new developments that make this whole situation even more ridiculous than it already was. So Sarah apparently decided that since begging and crying wasn't working, she needed to try a different approach.

And she's now claiming that the whole fake affair thing was actually my fault because I wasn't paying enough attention to her and she felt neglected and unappreciated in our marriage. She sent me this long text message yesterday explaining how she'd been dropping hints for months about wanting more romance and attention and how I'd been ignoring all her signals. So, she felt like she had no choice but to do something drastic to get through to me.

And she actually used the phrase, "You forced me to fake an affair," which is possibly the most insane thing I've ever heard in my life. According to her new version of events, this wasn't a prank at all. It was a legitimate attempt to communicate her needs to me after I'd failed to pick up on her more subtle attempts.

and she seems to genuinely believe that what she did was justified because I hadn't been meeting her emotional needs. I showed this text to my lawyer and he just shook his head and said he's never seen someone dig themselves into a deeper hole so effectively because now instead of just admitting she made a mistake and asking for forgiveness, she's actually trying to justify what she did and blame me for driving her to it. But wait, it gets worse because apparently Sarah has been talking to some of her other friends and co-workers about our situation.

and she's been telling people that I'm divorcing her because she tried to spice up our marriage and that I'm being unreasonably jealous and controlling by not appreciating her efforts to make our relationship more exciting. I found this out because my friend Dave works at the same company as Sarah and he pulled me aside yesterday to ask me what the hell was going on because people at Sarah's office are apparently talking about how I'm filing for divorce over some harmless flirting and jealousy games and they think I'm completely overreacting. Dave knows me well enough to know that this didn't sound right.

So, he asked me for the real story. And when I told him what actually happened, he was completely shocked and said that Sarah had been describing it as just some playful teasing to make me more attentive, not a psychological manipulation campaign. So, now I'm dealing with the fact that Sarah is actively rewriting history and making me look like the bad guy to anyone who will listen.

And I'm sure her divorced friends are backing up her version of events because they were the ones who came up with this stupid plan in the first place. I decided I needed to protect myself from this narrative. she's creating.

So, I actually saved all the voicemails she left me right after I found out the truth where she was crying and apologizing and admitting that it was all fake and that she'd made a terrible mistake because I have a feeling I'm going to need proof of what actually happened when she tries to make me look like the villain. Speaking of her friends, Lisa apparently sobered up and realized that she'd blown up their whole scheme. So, she called me to try to do damage control and convince me that what they did wasn't really that bad and that I should give Sarah another chance.

But instead of helping her case, she just made it worse by revealing even more details about how planned and deliberate this whole thing was. She told me that they'd actually been planning this for 3 months before they started implementing it, and that they'd researched different ways to make men jealous and possessive and had chosen the fake affair approach because they thought it would be the most effective way to get me to step up my game as a husband. She also mentioned that they'd been documenting the whole thing in a group chat, sharing updates about how I was reacting and celebrating each time their plan worked to make me more anxious or attentive.

and she said they'd been calling it Project Wakeup Call, which makes me sick to think about. But here's the part that really made my blood boil. Lisa said that they'd actually been disappointed that it took me so long to confront Sarah about the affair because they thought I'd get jealous and possessive much sooner.

And they were starting to think that maybe I just didn't care enough about Sarah to fight for her. So, not only did they torture me for 6 weeks, they were actually critiquing my performance as a worried husband and wondering if I was going to react strongly enough to make their experiment worthwhile, like I was some kind of lab rat that wasn't performing up to their expectations. Lisa also told me that Monica had suggested they should push things even further and have Sarah actually go on a fake date with some guy just to see how far they could push me before I snapped.

But thankfully, they decided that was too risky because they were afraid I might actually hire a private investigator or do something else that would expose their plan. The fact that they even considered escalating it that far shows me that these women have absolutely no boundaries or sense of decency, and they would have kept pushing until they completely destroyed my mental health if they hadn't been stopped by their own stupidity. I also found out that Sarah's parents knew something was going on because she'd asked them for advice about how to make me more romantic and attentive, but she told them she was just planning some surprises and wanted to shake up our routine.

So, they had no idea she was actually planning to fake an affair. When her parents found out the truth after I filed for divorce, they were apparently horrified and told Sarah that what she'd done was completely unacceptable. But, they're still trying to convince me to give her another chance because they don't want to see their daughter's marriage end over this.

Her dad actually called me yesterday and said that he understood why I was angry, but that Sarah had learned her lesson and that divorce seemed like an extreme reaction. And I told him that what his daughter did was extreme and that my reaction was proportionate to the damage she'd caused. I also told him that if someone other than Sarah had done this to me, like if a stranger had spent 6 weeks making me think my wife was cheating just for their own entertainment, he would probably want me to press charges.

And the fact that it was his daughter who did it doesn't make it any less harmful or twisted. He didn't really have an answer for that. And I think he's starting to understand that this isn't just some marital spat that can be fixed with counseling and apologies.

The divorce proceedings are moving along and my lawyer says we should be able to get this wrapped up fairly quickly since we don't have kids and our finances aren't too complicated. And honestly, I just want it to be over so I can start rebuilding my life without having to deal with Sarah's attempts to manipulate the narrative. I'm also planning to move to a different part of town once the divorce is final because I don't want to run into Sarah or her friends at the grocery store or the gym or anywhere else.

And I figure a fresh start in a new neighborhood will help me put this whole nightmare behind me. Some people have asked if I miss Sarah or if I'm having second thoughts about the divorce. And honestly, I miss the person I thought she was.

But I don't miss the person she actually turned out to be. And I'm actually feeling relieved that I found out what she was capable of before we had kids or bought a house together or made any other major commitments. I keep thinking about what would have happened if Lisa hadn't gotten drunk and spilled the secret and how long Sarah would have been willing to let me suffer thinking she was cheating on me.

And I realized that the woman I thought I married would never have been able to watch me go through that kind of pain without telling me the truth. But the real Sarah watched me lose weight and lose sleep and walk around in a constant state of anxiety and worry. And not only did she not feel bad about it, she was actively enjoying it and reporting back to her friends about how well their plan was working.

That's not someone I want to be married to. And that's not someone I can ever trust again. And I'm done feeling guilty about protecting myself from someone who clearly doesn't have my best interests at heart.

Update three. I thought I was done updating the situation, but something happened yesterday that was so unbelievable that I had to share it because I literally could not make this stuff up if I tried. And it's like Sarah and her friends are determined to prove that they're even worse people than I originally thought.

So, the divorce has been proceeding normally and were supposed to finalize everything next week. And I thought the drama was mostly over except for Sarah's occasional attempts to contact me and beg me to reconsider, but apparently her friends decided they needed to make one last attempt to fix the situation they created. Monica called me yesterday afternoon and said she wanted to meet up to talk about Sarah and how we could work things out.

And against my better judgment, I agreed to meet her for coffee because I was curious about what she could possibly have to say that would change anything. So, we met at this coffee shop and Monica started off by apologizing for her role in the whole fake affair thing and saying that she realized now that it had been a mistake and that they'd gone too far. And I thought maybe she was actually going to take some responsibility for what they'd done.

But then she said that she had a confession to make and that she needed to tell me something that might change how I felt about divorcing Sarah. And she looked all serious and dramatic like she was about to reveal some big secret that would make everything make sense. What she told me next was so ridiculous that I actually started laughing because Monica claimed that the real reason they'd come up with the fake affair plan was because Sarah had confided in them that she suspected I was cheating on her and they thought that making me jealous would either prove that I was faithful or expose my own affair.

According to Monica's new story, Sarah had been worried for months that I was having an affair because I'd been working late sometimes and I'd changed my phone password and I'd been going to the gym more regularly. And she'd asked her friends for advice on how to find out if her suspicions were correct. Monica said that they'd suggested the fake affair plan as a way to test my loyalty because if I was cheating, then I wouldn't care if Sarah seemed to be cheating, too.

But if I was faithful, then I'd get jealous and fight for our marriage, which would prove that I still loved her and wasn't stepping out on her. I just stared at her for a minute because this was such obvious nonsense that I couldn't believe she expected me to buy it. And then I asked her why Sarah had never mentioned being suspicious of me during any of our conversations about the divorce and why she'd never brought up these concerns when she was apologizing and begging me to take her back.

Monica got all flustered and said that Sarah was embarrassed about being suspicious and didn't want to accuse me of cheating without proof. So, she'd kept her concerns to herself and just asked her friends for advice on how to handle the situation. But here's the thing.

I know this is complete [ __ ] because Sarah had no reason to be suspicious of me. I've never cheated on anyone in my life and I've never even been tempted to cheat. And the things Monica mentioned as red flags are just normal life stuff that any married person would recognize as completely innocent.

I work late sometimes because I have deadlines and projects that require extra hours. I changed my phone password because I got a new phone and needed a more secure password for work apps. And I started going to the gym more because my doctor told me I needed to get more exercise after my last physical.

None of these things would make a normal person suspicious of cheating. And Sarah never acted like she was worried about any of this stuff. She never asked me about working late or about my phone or made any comments about the gym.

So, I know Monica is just making this up to try to justify what they did. I told Monica that her story didn't make any sense and that it sounded like she was trying to rewrite history to make Sarah look like the victim instead of the perpetrator. And she got defensive and said that I was being unreasonable and that Sarah really had been worried about our marriage.

Then she said that even if Sarah's suspicions were wrong, the fake affair plan had actually worked because it had made me more attentive and romantic, and that our marriage might have been stronger than ever if I hadn't overreacted and filed for divorce. I told her that our marriage would have been stronger if Sarah had just talked to me about whatever concerns she had instead of conspiring with her bitter friends to psychologically torture me, and that the fact that she thought lying and manipulation were better options than honest communication told me everything I needed to know about her and her friends. I stood up to leave and told Monica to lose my number and to tell her friends and my ex-wife to do the same.

I said the only person I wanted to hear from was my lawyer and that their attempts to manipulate me further were only solidifying my decision. I walked out of the coffee shop, leaving her sitting there with her jaw practically on the floor. I got in my car and just drove for a while trying to wrap my head around the sheer audacity of their latest lie.

They had gone from it was a harmless prank to you forced her to do it and now to we were actually testing your loyalty. It was like watching a masterclass in deflection and gaslighting. And honestly, it was almost impressive in its depravity.

They were so committed to their narrative that they would invent entirely new realities to avoid taking a single shred of responsibility. I'm done being the butt of their joke. The punchline is that I'm finally free.

Update 4. So, it's finally done. After 8 months of the most ridiculous, dragged out nonsense you could possibly imagine, the divorce is final.

8 months. And I swear every single day of it, Sarah or one of her genius friends found a new way to make me question my sanity. But I'm on the other side of it now.

And honestly, I'm just numb. The last time I updated you, Monica had tried to feed me that absolute garbage about how they were testing my loyalty. And I thought that was the peak of their insanity.

But I was wrong. Oh, so wrong. For the next few months, Sarah's strategy shifted to this weird mix of playing the victim and then sending these formal, emotionless emails through her lawyer, like she wasn't the same person who was leaving me sobbing voicemails.

just a few weeks earlier. One minute, she's telling mutual friends how I abandoned her at her lowest point. The next, her lawyer is sending a demand for a goddamn fondue pot we got as a wedding gift.

Her parents kept trying to mediate, which was really just them asking me to forgive and forget because marriage is hard. And I had to tell her dad straight up, marriage is hard, yes, but what your daughter did wasn't marriage. It was a sick game and I'm not playing anymore.

I think that finally got through to him because they backed off after that. And get this, for the final mediation session, Sarah brought Jennifer with her for emotional support. Jennifer, one of the architects of Project Wakeup Call, she just sat there with this smug look on her face like she was some kind of relationship expert, and I just looked at my lawyer and told him I wasn't going to say a single word while that woman was in the room.

The mediator had to ask her to leave. And Sarah acted like I just committed the worst crime imaginable by not wanting one of the people who helped orchestrate my psychological torture to watch me divide up some of our assets. You can't make this stuff up.

The day the papers were officially finalized was weird. I got the email from my lawyer and that was it. I'm still at my brother's place, though.

I'm looking for my own apartment now. I needed the time to just decompress and not be in the house we shared. I know I did the right thing.

I don't have a single doubt about that, but it's still hard to accept that this is my life now. Divorced at 36 because my wife and her friends thought emotional abuse would be a fun way to spice up our marriage. It's still the most insane thing I've ever been through, and I'm just glad it's finally over.