Welcome to our diplomatic reception in today's exercise we're going to pretend that we are ambassadors at a diplomatic reception this is a useful exercise for you to learn about because you may be for example at a wedding or you may be at some sort of a reception held by your bosses and so these are some interesting rules to U be aware of so as I mentioned a few General uh rules follow but obviously the forms of address between ambassadors or important people can vary greatly from culture to culture we did a diplomatic handshaking uh exercise
and discussion when we first met each other and got together where we all um learned to shake hands and I wanted you to practice shaking hands over the week so if you meet an ambassador then you address them as Mr or Ambassador I always just stick with ambassador uh so if you're going to meet a president you keep saying president and the first lady Nancy Reagan and then Prince Charles you would keep saying um Prince by and then that's old picture of Lady Diana so she was Lady you never call them by their first name
although we all know their first names every country is treated in the same way uniformly so you are always being observed as an ambassador and you have to know that whatever you say um it can is representative of our country so you can't express your own personal views you have to always say our country's uh views and so um that's very very important the forms of address can vary from culture to culture so it's important to ask your advisers and locals a few about the rules you know do you bow and so on um you
should always rely on courtesy titles until requested to do so otherwise so you know if president Trump finally says to you well call me Donald well then you get to call him Donald um you should always address them as Ambassador in the public eye even if you're friends so I would you know let's say I was an ambassador then you keep referring to me although you can write to me and and talk to me as Erica but in front of others you should always address me as Ambassador or in real life you should address me
as Prof in front of others those that are below the rank of Ambassador might have different titles it depends on whether you know their marital status I just say Miz um no matter what in English the accepted formal response to any introduction is to to say well how how do you do not how are you doing or hey you say hello how are you and then or it's so nice to meet you and so on so you need to learn the different phrases that countries have upon arriving at your posting uh so honor is recognized
by the name spoken first so this can be complicated but when you're in a group you look around you think well first of all who's female the oldest female is introduced first even before the president then you go to the males and you go start with the oldest male who is the highest in rank okay and then you proceed to the junior uh males so all the females are introduced starting with the most senior female or the oldest female and then all of the males from the highest rank to the lowest rank practice if you
can with others because when you are paralyzed at a reception and you're introducing people to each other you need to do this very quickly to make introductions more pleasant it can be useful to say something about each other so I mean I often will say Simpson um yeah my name is Erica Simpson my last name is like Simpson like the show or like OJ Simpson I used to say that but now I say like the show and then or um we'll say something like cold hands warm heart because my hands tend to be cold so
when you come into a room um men are supposed to stand up when being introduced to a woman and in some countries a man will kiss a married woman's hand not an unmarried woman's hand so don't roll your eyes when he does this it's very popular amongst Russian and French diplomats to do this or they may air kiss you if they've met you before women should rise when being introduced to other women I always just rise out of respect my rule is always to rise never shake hands from a sitting position reaching with your hand
above your head so here you can see some Japanese diplomats bowing see how they're the more senior ranked one has his head a little higher and then the junior ones have their heads lower and then these two are equal uh and here they are shaking hands so you have to check what the expression might be okay let's say you're meeting someone um and they can't remember all of the names so I might suggest something like saying some way mention your name so think about it before you say it so hello good evening my name I'm
Erica Simpson we met recently at the ambassador's home I'm pleased to see you again and then they will introduce thems again so you just start from the assumption that they will not remember your name titles ecclesiastical traditional titles ecclesiastical means a religious like bishop or ad Minister um they can vary among countries so they vary even between the Canada and the United States so it's very appropriate to begin your emails and SN snail letters with titles Dear honorable Senator uh or dear Senator dear Member of Parliament Dear honorable Member of Parliament so practice saying it
so it rolls off your lips you know I've introduced ambassadors so many times I have no trouble saying this is Ambassador Douglas Ro this is Ambassador Marius grinus uh now if I had to do the British ones I'm less familiar with that um but the the British have Lords we don't have Lords and they also Knight the queen Knights um people um as well so a knight is a title so as I mention I just say Miz and then a young man under the age of 18 is a master this is uh in New Zealand
and Australia as well and a young woman is a Miss okay how should you address uh ambassadors there's a lot of discussion but I always even if they're retired call them ambassadors so that's the long-standing practice is you continue to use that title even if they've changed and I mean some people like uh a friend of my uh uh Chris Chris what's his last name I forgotten Gees this is bad anyway he's been the ambassador to seven different countries so you know you just say Ambassador and don't even bother saying this is the ambassador to
China or something David morrone is the ambassador to China oh I've got to remember Chris's last name so my policy is to keep calling them Ambassador in public and U in private you can call him Doug or some or Marius here but um you also um you should introduce them by their full name so may I introduce you to The Honorable Member of Parliament Paul duer so Paul duer died um just today he was only 56 years old he was a member of parliament before uh the 2015 election and but it is customary to still
call him honorable The Honorable Paul derer the business card is important and um it it it will include your name and your rank so right now we're pretending to be ambassadors but you could have a business card that has your name and then it says uh be Bachelor's of Arts candidate or let's say you're a candidate in nursing or Kinesiology or something like that then you could put your title here and then all of your contact numbers I suggest keeping a permanent address maybe with your parents um that's your permanent address and your city and
town and then if you have all these cell phone numbers and Gmail accounts and so on stick them all in there so here it's your your name not with a prefects at all not doctor or anything just your name and then all of your uh titles afterwards similarly for for here James Smith and it's not mil there's no military rank there okay when you exchange uh business cards note how the other person's presenting their business card and then follow as they do it so if they present it to you with two hands like this then
you should also present yours with two hands and then amongst Asian cultures they tend to spend quite a long time looking at your business card their business cards can sometimes be a little bit more detailed on the back and the front but I've seen business cards in Braille I've seen all sorts of business cards paper business cards so don't exchange them when you're at a formal dinner but exchange them at the end of your conversation pass it all onto them across the table so you use business cards when you meet someone for the first time
or when you're calling on someone leaving a message but you don't go to a reception and just hand them out to everyone um business cards are used for for um uh creating invitation lists later so make sure that you have one um so it's a good way to exchange information a classy way now to understand host cultures there can be many uh cultural blunders and so there is usually an a grace period where you can make many mistakes while you absorb the nuances of a new culture but you also have to really learn about who
to Vite whom to Vite and how formal or informal an event will be so there's also custom on reciprocity giving of gifts and so on here finally are some dressing guidelines to clarify a little bit the differences between formal and Casual way wear s and day and evening wear so there's always um exceptions so this here picture is of formal Black Tie where if you are entitled to do so you can wear your medals and your military ranks and um your knighthoods and so on and formal wear might be at the New York Metropolitan Opera
at the theater and for formal formal uh evenings black TI is generally not worn this in the daytime but white tie is very formal um I've never actually been to anything that is white tie at all I'm not even sure what tails are anymore but certainly you would as a female wear a floor length not a shorter uh ball room G gown if you don't know what to wear then just call the hosts and ask them what you should be wearing and they might advise you you know you can say should I wear a business
suit um here I think uh well he they're all wearing business suits and so on um and then the men here are wearing um ties black shoes different colored socks and so on female hot Tire can vary more um it might be um what's called a knee length cocktail dress or here more floor length Ballroom gowns um that's the president of France with his wife and then the president of the United States with his wife so high heel shoes or your formal National dress and so on should you wear gloves uh if you meet the
queen you probably are going to be advised to wear gloves so here you are you're meeting not the queen here but um this is the uh Prince Harry's new wife and um notice the men are wearing top hats and ties and then the women are wearing hats uh so gloves are optional hats are optional but um you know certainly it is very complicated
