Do you feel anxious but you don't know why? Anxiety is often caused by micro habits that we don't even notice, but they build up over time. So let's troubleshoot.
Today we're going to explore seven common reasons why someone might feel anxious without realizing the cause. These are the things that I would explore with a client in the second session or thereabouts. So if you want, you can print off the worksheet that I'm using and fill it out right now along with the video.
The link's in the description. And as we go through the questions, if you find yourself answering more than four from any one category with a yes, then that's a sign to explore that category and to try the skills and free resources that I'll share in the worksheet. But first, a disclaimer.
Though I wish I could get to know each of you, I am not your therapist, and this is not a formal assessment. It's just a chance to explore your anxiety. So let's jump in.
Is it worry? Do you worry about things a lot? Do you have a hard time relaxing?
When you lie down to sleep, does your mind race? When something good might happen, do you imagine everything that might go wrong? Do you worry about the past too much?
Do you overthink and overanalyze situations? Do you feel uncomfortable if you don't keep your mind busy with social media, the news, or other activities? Okay.
So that was seven questions. If you answered yes to more than four of them, that might be a sign that worry is underlying your anxiety. So worry is a habit.
It's a mental behavior that we engage in. When we worry we bring to mind thoughts of danger which trigger a stress response in our body. Worry is one of the most common causes of general anxiety disorder.
But if you tell someone like, "Stop worrying," that literally does not work. So what does work instead? In the download I will give you links to four skills you can use.
Okay. But now let's explore six more categories that cause anxiety. So category number two: is it your body?
Do you feel tight, tense, or jittery? Do you frequently have an upset stomach or headaches? Do you get sick frequently?
Do you struggle to eat healthily or get enough sleep? Do you grind your teeth at night? Do you have back pain or muscle tension?
Do you get less than 30 minutes of physical movement each day? Do you drink too much caffeine or eat too much sugar? Do you use drugs, alcohol, or nicotine?
Okay. So stress is the physical part of anxiety. It's the nervous system activation of the fight-or-flight response.
What's cool is that we can treat anxiety from both directions, the cognitive aspect and the physical aspect. Taking care of our body with proper sleep, exercise, and nutrition can decrease anxiety more effectively than medication. And good nutrition has been shown to decrease our risk of anxiety by 30 to 40%.
I teach these skills and the harder part, which is how to implement them, in my course Change Your Brain. But I also have free videos that you can watch. They're linked In the worksheet.
Let's keep going. Number three: is it overwhelm? Does your calendar feel extra full?
Are you busy all the time? Do you rush from one activity to the next? Do you feel like you can't take breaks, relax, or do self-care?
Do you find it hard to say no to people? Do you take on too many commitments? Do you feel disorganized, rushed, or constantly late?
Are you overly stressed about money, work, or other responsibilities? So anxiety is essentially a fear response, and when we have too many things going on at once our body and our brain perceive this as a threat. Multitasking, crowded calendars, and too many commitments trigger our ancient survival responses into thinking that we are going to starve or something.
So if we want to manage our anxiety we have to create a sustainable approach to productivity. Okay. Number four: is it avoidance?
Do you constantly avoid situations or problems? Avoidance fuels the anxiety cycle. And I go into a lot of detail in my anxiety course.
But our brain is super good at creating these sneaky ways to avoid. So let's explore. So here's some forms of avoidance.
Do you try to control everything? Do you distract yourself with TV, social media, drama, humor, or daydreaming? Do you blame others or get angry a lot?
Do you procrastinate? Do you overindulge in pleasure seeking, like food, shopping, sex, or drugs? Do you isolate yourself or withdraw from social situations?
Do you intellectualize instead of feeling your emotions? Do you overwork or find ways to keep busy? Are you an adrenaline junkie, or do you seek excitement through impulsive behaviors?
Do you use coping skills like mindfulness, breath work, relaxation, positive thinking, or over sleeping in order to avoid your feelings? Now, if you're confused about the last one, I have like 10 videos on it. But here's the litmus test: if you're using coping skills to try not to feel anxious, that's avoidance.
If you're using coping skills to help you get better at having feelings so that you can live a valued, purposeful life, that's healthy. Okay. Moving on.
Number five: is it trauma or unresolved emotional issues? Here's the test: do you have memories of the past that you try not to think about? Are you jumpy or constantly scanning for threats?
That's hypervigilance. Do you have a history of abuse or neglect, even if you think it's not that bad? Do you come from a dysfunctional family?
So that could include observing violence, substance abuse, incarceration, being emotionally abused or neglected, or just simply not getting your physical needs met. Do you get emotionally triggered or suddenly overreact to people or situations without really knowing why? Do you suppress emotions rather than addressing them?
Avoidance is one of the big markers for PTSD. Are there specific people, situations, or places that you avoid because they remind you of past trauma? Okay.
Oh, one more: do you experience flashbacks, nightmares, or intrusive thoughts related to past events? So trauma does two things. First, it can physically change our brain and our nervous system to make us more sensitive to stress.
And second, triggers and memories of trauma can make us more anxious in the present moment. But there are practical skills you can learn to work through it. And, as always, the links are in the worksheet.
Okay. Now, let's check your thinking patterns to see if your thoughts are lying to you. So number six: we're going to check for perfectionism and self-judgment.
Do you beat yourself up? Do you feel like you're never good enough? Do you compare yourself to others?
Do you frequently feel guilty or ashamed? Do you have unrealistically high standards? Do you feel worthless if you're not keeping busy or helping others or being productive all the time?
Are you afraid that other people are constantly judging you? Like do you worry about what other people think about you all the time? Okay.
That's number six. Number seven: here's another thought pattern that frequently fuels anxiety. And people might not notice they're doing it.
It's called catastrophizing. So do you expect the worst to happen? Do you try not to get your hopes up so they don't get crushed?
Do you visualize every possible bad outcome? If a few bad things happen in your day is the whole day ruined? If you failed at something once do you expect that you will always fail?
Do you often think, "Why try? If I can't do it perfectly, it's not worth it? " Do you think that others are out to get you or that the game is rigged or that success is just not possible for someone like you?
These are signs of catastrophizing. Thinking patterns like perfectionism and catastrophizing can trick our mind into thinking that we're in danger when we're not. And this can make people feel anxious without knowing why.
Because when we believe what we think we don't we don't really notice that our thoughts are fueling our anxiety. And you can learn to change how you think, and that can directly decrease anxiety. Okay.
So those are the seven categories I might explore if someone is anxious and they don't know why. I think it's normal for a lot of people to have a yes here and there and in a few categories, but if you've got like majority yeses in one category, that might be a good place to start exploring. In the downloadable worksheet I've linked four to five skills you can learn to improve in each area.
And these are free skills, like free YouTube videos you can access. You could also download my simple habit tracker and work on one of these skills for a month, and then when you feel like you've got the hang of it you can pick another skill the next month to build on that. Now, you might be asking, "But what if I add a ton of yeses in multiple categories?
" Yeah. That's okay. I I I get that.
I see that. I sometimes am that, right? I would say just start with one area that seems either the easiest to work on or the most pressing area.
So for me, I love to exercise. When my stress starts building up, getting back into exercise is going to be my first area to work on because it's easy for me. But also it's likely to help me feel better pretty quickly.
But when my calendar is too full, when I'm committed to too many things, that really stresses me out, so that's a more pressing issue. So because that adds so much to my stress, that would be my second area to work on. So what's important is that you pick the low-hanging fruit.
You start with small changes that are going to make a big difference. And it really will start to add up over time. I mean, like this is how your anxiety built up.
It was in tiny little habits that you didn't notice. So this is how we're going to replace it, with calm and order by just making one small change at a time. In working with my own clients I've seen that these tiny habits can add up over time to help you feel more calm and centered and in control of your life.
Okay. I hope that was helpful. And again, links are in the description.
Thank you so much for watching, and take care.
