BF lied about getting a vasectomy and tried to force me to have his baby I got an AB RTI on he threatened to end me hello everyone I F34 have been in a relationship with Finn m47 for a little over a year I live on my own and he lives on his own but occasionally I spend the night at his place Finn is handsome fit funny and charitable his kindness was what caught my attention he was just a very thoughtful and kind man and I love that about him I have struggles with PTSD so I
don't feel comfortable with intimacy until I feel safe and trust that person Finn said he understood and didn't press it we didn't start getting intimate until 2 months in but I was pretty drunk so I was upset the next morning and he comforted me he didn't get angry or blame me at all after that we had a healthy sex life I was adamant he wear protection every time once while we were in the middle of playtime he asked if he could take the condom off I said no and he said that it wasn't feeling good
to him and he is unable to climax with one on I said no again afterwards he didn't cuddle or hold me like he always did and said nothing to me I got up to get a water and ask if he needed anything and leaned over to kiss his cheek he shoted away from my kiss and muttered oh now you care about me I asked him what that was about and he told me he bends over backwards to make me happy but he didn't get to feel good because I won't let him not wear a condom
I told him I'm very worried about pregnancy I live in a place where abortions are extremely difficult he said I am on birth control so what's the issue I said that's not 100% and he knew it I grabbed him a water and told him that if he got a as sectomy we could talk they are reversible and accessible I just cannot get pregnant we didn't discuss it it again and he even apologized for being a jerk the very next morning and took me to the spa I apologized for ruining the night and he said it
was all right and we kind of moved on everything was great and around the six-month Mark he said he thinks we are getting serious and that he considers me his partner and asked about the condoms again I reminded him of my requirement for that and he said he had to think about it about 2 months ago he had a work trip that lasted a week and a half and when he returned he was all over me at the time I was going through a difficult depression I suffer from depression and sometimes it gets really bad
he seemed annoyed and made a remark that I am punishing him for missing and loving me so much and he held my face and started kissing me again after the back and forth for a few more minutes I just gave up and we had sex in the middle of it he asked if he could take off the condom and I said no but he said he had the vasectomy he was so excited to get me in bed he had forgotten to tell me I stupidly said well all right then after that he would forget the
condemns altogether until my cycle was off at first I figured it was stress change in diet a billion other possible reasons but this nagging feeling came over me and I got tested pregnant he found me crying on his bathroom floor and asked what was wrong so I told him and he smiled and laughed like really that's amazing baby and left me there and he went whooping through the other room when he came back he was rattling off so much info he had a dream about this and now it's happening so it must be a sign
my brain finally caught up and I asked about the vasectomy and he said it's not 100% right like condoms and pills I was puzzled as the only goalie we took out of the equation was condoms he said it was a miracle and I told him absolutely not I explained that my best friend lives in a different state and I will be going to visit and also benefit from the reproductive health clinics there he went silent he asked me if I really hated him that much and I didn't understand I said I never want to be
pregnant and that he knew this about me that hasn't changed he became extremely angry with me saying I wouldn't dare murder his child and that if I loved him I would never threaten that again he explained that he will take care of us he makes plenty of money and don't I treat you like a queen so all he is asking is that I have the baby I said I needed to go and started packing to go home and he followed me repainting things like you won't though right you won't murder my baby and stuff like
that he kept asking where I was going and I said home I was too tired and emotional right now and I want to go home he stepped in the doorway and said no and we need to talk about this I started to get upset as he was blocking me and I felt trapped I asked him to move and he said no I asked him again I want to go home and he said no again he said you are not leaving what part of that don't you get I started crying and grabbed my phone and backed
away from him telling him to stay away from me Finn looked really sad and said I could be serious he would never hurt me and ask me to stop crying I demanded he let me leave and he did he has since been calling and texting me begging me to talk to him he says I really hurt him by pretending to be scared of him as I know he would never hurt me he said he treats me like a goddess and I played the helpless victim card and that things like that can ruin a man's life
he then said that I wasn't thinking straight and is your brain lying to you again when I have a PTSD or depressive episode I sometimes say my brain is lying to me again to make it seem less heavy at topic he has a very Community facing job and I remember the look on his face when I backed away I don't want to ruin his life or our relationship in the moment my emotions were so high that I just reacted but I wasn't pretending I sat in my car for God knows how long shaking before I
could drive home I've been ignoring his reaching out but I feel like a coward aah comments aalami he literally lied about getting a vasectomy and got you pregnant after you had explicitly set boundaries oop on as she lied about birth control to her boyfriend oop I am on the patch never lied about that update one so I made an appointment and got the abortion it was honestly such a horrible experience but my bestie was with me and the whole staff were so kind and supportive so I grateful thank you to those who encouraged me to
get it done it was awful but pregnancy and being trapped with him would have been much worse Finn texted Wednesday and apologized and said he said things he didn't mean and to please answer my phone as I've been ignoring him when he called again my bestie recorded it all before I could finish hello he went on a long bit about how amazing I am how much he loves me what a great mother he knows I will be and he will marry me immediately if that's a concern of mine when I finally got to talk I
said that I am no longer pregnant and I never want to be and that I was clear about this from the beginning he asked if it was miscarriage and then said because I know you wouldn't willingly murder our child right say right it's a miscarriage I got quiet and he said that it's okay miscarriages are not the female's fault and that we can just try again I said again we weren't trying to begin with I was on BC and he had the vasectomy and you all guessed it he laughed and said he lied about the
vasectomy so I would give up on condemns that he long decided I was perfect and he loved me and wanted me to be the mother of his kids my best friend spoke up and said it was recorded and to leave me alone or she will post it on social media and he started screaming at us he then sounded like he was crying and said I was a witch for this that I am a hateful murderer and that I broke his heart he went on to say if I tried to slander him to remember actions have
consequences he then broke up with me and said he will check back with me in a few days when I'm actually alone and we will talk in person to see if I have come to my senses he wants us to go to church together Sunday which is now today and set a time to pick me up I said no but I do have a ring Cam and sure enough he showed up at my door I watched him note my car was not there and at my front door on camera he texted me asking if I
was sleeping around on him and if I let the other man ride you like a wild horse without a condom and if so he gets a hall pass he said to come home immediately as we need to come to an understanding about relationship ASAP I return home tomorrow and don't know what to do edit one anyone who wants to shame my abortion I have zero regrets and actually will advocate for them from now on but I will happily mock you in the comments thanks actually you reminded me how little an opinion means to me if
it's coming from a disrespectful and or bigoted place at least I get to laugh through this nightmare edit to I won't be going home alone any longer bestie is coming with me and I have a friend in the city I live with my spare key and he is now in my home watching it for me edit three since I've been asked in the comments this really blew up so sorry if I don't reply to you all I am in a safe location with two male friends who know the whole story and we are looking into
options I don't want to do anything Hasty a guy friend is at my home and thus far it's been quiet I will make an update when I know more edit 4 no I will not harm myself the way some of you have messaged me for those calling themselves pro-life you sure want me to take my own not very pro-life at all and since we're on the topic I don't want to get pregnant because I was told by my doctors that I have a high chance of passing away even before making it to term the child
also has a high rate of mortality during the pregnancy essentially we would both kick the bucket before delivery I am ineligible for tubules or hysterectomy where I live until I turn 40 at plaw especially with my insurance and I would never be able to afford the out-of pocket fee the places even still require a husband's signature as a policy I would be open to adopting if I ever found the right person and were settled and ready comments aquanus this isn't about you getting an abortion this is about your ex not respecting you enough to attempt
baby trapping you into a long-term relationship and or marriage he doesn't respect you or your choices he lied to you about having a vasectomy he's gaslighting you and trying to control you you need to bring that recording to the police ASAP and file for a restraining order because your ex won't stop until he's faced with the consequences of his actions remain Vigilant stay safe oop thank you and to everyone who's been telling me this I am starting to feel less like I am crazy and more like I need to take action and protect myself from
this guy I think I trusted him so much I would have happily married him he said he didn't want kids when we met this is all a lot but it's helping me understand more and more that I being played Sand Bar Lakers everyone saying get a lawyer ASAP but she might not even be able to afford one op is there anyone who can go home with you I truly have your safe keep us posted and not because this is interesting but because there are those of us who genuinely are concerned and Care oop I can't
afford one I work in the Arts and just would never be able to swing the costs I'm seeing online my bestie is returning home with me and I have a friend at home who is house sitting now mysterious uncore Ben 4354 isn't the thing he did called reproductive violence can he be charged with rape for this if it's possible you should definitely go to police and press charges against him he's such an [ __ ] oop this has been brought up but it's the first I've heard of such a thing so bestie and I are
checking every state has its own rulle so we will see mine is not pro choice friendly professional Zone 168 the part about him wanting you to go to church with him disturbs me what kind of church is it do you think that he's being egged on by fellow church members please consider going to stay with a friend for a while and then maybe with a family member or another friend after that this dude sounds scary AF No Lie oop he goes to a mega church with a coffee shop in it but only on holidays I
told him I did not want to participate and only went with him because he begged for Easter it was bigger than a '90s shopping mall with a shop and everything update to I actually forgot about my post so I apologize I didn't even realize so many of you messaged me to check in or offer kind words A lot happened in a short time but I will try to make it brief Finn came to my home again but I was not home on my ring Kim I saw him have a total fit He was cursing me
out calling me on the phone and when he got my voicemail he muttered I'm going to [ __ ] kll her over and over again and said it super loud once before walking off I've been getting a lot of hate mail texts and the like calling me a murderer my Facebook was flooded with these messages as well and most of the profiles were people who went to Finn's church so I sent him a text that either the harassment stops or I will post the recordings of him all of them the call his threats the texts
his voicemails all of it he replied I have been patient in my love for you but you are being a brat and went on to say that I need to come to my senses and meet with him because he will no longer spoil me and discipline needs to be introduced to our relationship because actions have consequences as for the rest I will skip over a bit for the sake of brevity my bestie said that I should go to the police and we did but nothing concrete has come of it yet something I lowkey expected honestly
it's a small little city outside a bigger more populated one and the small town Vibes can run deep in certain circles many of the people go to to the church Finn is at and that includes a lot of the police department it came to a head last week when I sent some of the recordings to his parents who are on staff at the local mega church in the area his mom responded and asked to meet with me so I went with my bestie to a public spot in the city when she met with me she
was incredibly apologetic and said that his position at the church is terminated the staff will meet about this and decide on the full measure of consequences as his church family she told me that she herself had an abortion before Finn was born and her decision to do so came hugely from the fact that the father was manipulative and abusive and she was not ready to be a mother even if she had a reliable and loving partner and co-parent she went on to meet Finn's father and married him and had her children she told me that
she isn't sure if I had an abortion or miscarriage but either way I should not be harassed by Christians claiming to be pro-life I can't explain to you the relief those words gave me considering the vile that was messaged to me Finn's sister reached out to me via text to share that she does not condone what her brother has been doing and to reach out if I needed anything Finn later was arrested for assault I came to find out but I don't know who he assaulted or why just that he was taken into custody and
as he put me down as his partner I was called to pick him up as he had been released the running assumption is that kept him to sober up before releasing him I didn't I have since been looking for a new place to live as he knows my address and has come by more than a couple times I am staying with two of my best friends away from my town and my home is more or less storage for my things until I find a place to move all things considered I I'm actually really happy my
friends threw me a yeus that fetus party and decorated the place with the troll comments from my last post they made a pinata with scrapped paper with his texts and that of his church Pals and instead of candy it had condoms small bottle of lube and paper that was my last surprise they pulled together a nice siiz donation to reproductive health clinic near my city and they pledged hours to volunteer we are taking a summer trip together to have a hot girl summer kickoff and have many things planned the two male friends I am staying
with check on my house for me and saw Finn there once and made it clear under no uncertain terms that I was protected and that if he tries to make more trouble that actions have consequences I have it recorded on my ring Cam and it was glorious Finn sent me a text telling me that I am a cruel which that ruined his life and broke his heart all because he loved me but to not trouble myself with acting scared of him more because he is leaving the state soon for a new job anyway he did
end the message with I have do and always will love you and perhaps one day your cold heart will melt and you can find within it your buried love for me like bro take the sugar out of your Kool-Aid because I ain't drinking it anymore not to say everything is sunshine and Roses I I've been in a lot of therapy and finding that I overlooked a lot of red flags and have to unlearn a lot of people pleasing behaviors to become a more confident and true version of myself plus my friends don't really fully believe
he is leaving town so I'm still staying with them for the time being I love them a lot but it's like having four older siblings fussing about like mother hands I cannot wait to have my new place thanks to you all for the kindness and support I think this is my last update on the matter as I don't intend on wasting any more time than I have to on that abusive price of garbage remember you know yourself best and can love yourself best life is too short not to make the right choices for yourself your
well-being and your happiness because you matter comments aquinus I'm glad your ex's mother and sister are on your side and I'm glad you have friends who are looking out for you in your safety I know you don't want to but keep all of the disgusting messages your ex sends you because now that he's been charged with assault the next time you file a police report against him they'll have no choice but to take it seriously meanwhile continue your healing process and I hope you'll have peace soon I'm glad you're safe update 3 all up great
so I moved I took a pay cut and moved to Austin I can say that now free of worry because Finn well he's in prison for murder I know I know a disjointed rendition of what happened Finn got drunk out of his mind at a local bar then [ __ ] talked to retired Marine because the Marine spoke about his wife's abortion they fought Finn got his ass kicked Marine left and a regular gave Finn [ __ ] for getting his ass kicked so Finn fought him he threw the guy into a wall and it
gets worse from there the guy was fine for a few days but passed away due to his injuries all those who say my posts are fake and rage bait and [ __ ] well welcome to the weirdest [ __ ] part because this I can see why this makes you think that I had since gotten a new job in ATX and was moving when I heard Finn's father asked me to testify to his character and to say my abortion caused this I obviously didn't I moved with only the essentials and had a wonderful summer traveling
with friends I just got back last week and I'm now unpacking my new home unrelated but Austin is a fun freaking City when I got back and logged PN I saw a lot of you were con ered about my safety so I wanted to update I'm totally okay already have few friends and I'm going to adopt possibly the cutest little senior Yorkie I am literally in the waiting room where they will bring him out after he gets all his exit medical out of the way I am also in the virtual queue for an adult Rottweiler
and it sounds like I might get her so I may have her by the time the work week begins anyway I wanted to say thanks to everyone who was supportive and also I admit rub my happiness in the face of the trolls who wished me misery I am Petty Sumi ciao comments lost uncore a ising _ 232 new and happy Beginnings cheers oop it's exciting and the people here are so sweet for the first time in a long time I am really looking forward optimistically
