It's never too late | Dilys Price OBE | TEDxCardiff

Translator: Tanya Cushman Reviewer: Peter van de Ven Thank you for that. Now then, I came on dancing because it will give me courage and also because my favorite thing in the world is dancing in the sky. Now, my title, as you know, is going to be "It's Never Too Late.

" Now, my name is Dilys. I'm 84 years of age - 85 next month. (Applause) And I am here to tell you it's never too late.

Life could still be fun and challenging and can have a purpose. Now then, at the age of 81, I became the Guinness Book of Records oldest woman skydiver in the world. (Applause) I've done 1,136 skydives.

And this is that moment - what I remember so well, which I still do - when it's terrifying in a wonderful, beautiful way, and you're waiting for the engine to stall. You're looking at the lights; you're looking at the red, and then it changes to green. They pull the door up, you look out, you say "high-five" to everyone, and you go.

And that is beautiful. And I'm now feeling that same sense of beauty because I'm talking to you, and you're listening to me, and we are in it together. So, I like to skydive.

That skydive. (Applause) It's the ultimate sense of freedom. It's wonderful.

It is my passion, and I'm still doing it. I mean, two years ago, I broke my ankle in three places doing a skydive - doing a skydive for television, actually. So I was out of action for a year, or more than that, doing quite extensive physiotherapy.

But just before Christmas, having done 1,135, I did my 1,136th skydive. So, I'm back in the air, waiting now for this to be finished, and next week I'll be going up there. Now, skydiving - this is what I love to do.

It is dancing in the air. It's my speciality. It's really doing barrel rolls.

It's doing back flips; it's doing forward flips. It's doing stand ups; it's doing sit downs. And, you know, it's like driving a very, very fast car - it's very radical.

When, in the old days - because I've been doing this since I was 54 - you would train - (Laughter) I'm a late starter. In the old days, when I was actually doing competitions - I was doing competitions in freestyle - I would practice in the swimming pool, which is not very good, because it's sluggish and slow. Now they go to the air shuttle - which I've also been in, but now I'm too old to be actually competing - and so it's very, very fast.

You only have to do a little turn with your hands, and you're spinning. But it is a joy. It is absolutely wonderful, and I love my life.

Love my life. But it wasn't always like that. At 54 years old, I was like a chicken with my head cut off.

I had a stressful job, a responsible job. I was a single parent. I was 54, thinking life is going to end pretty soon.

Not yet, but I did think then. I didn't have a lover. I was alone, and I was working hard.

And I was full of fear and stress. And fear and stress are the killers. And in the 21st century, that is a real danger for us because if you become fearful and stressed, you start to disconnect - disconnect with yourself, disconnect with others and disconnect with life; you feel as if you're sleepwalking.

When that happens, it probably happens to all of us at some time, that's a danger sign. Do something about it. It will lead to breakdown; it will lead to physical illness; it will lead to unhappiness.

And I was aware that I was in the state of disconnect. And I thought, "I've got to do something about it. I've got to find a passion.

I've got to find a reason which is beyond work, beyond responsibility. " And I started to look stones over; I started to turn stones over. And you know, even the act of looking and searching and recognizing that I needed to do something about it was the beginning of healing for me.

So, I knew I had to find a passion. Long story, but I did read Goethe, who said at one point - and this is a paraphrase, he'd say it much more beautifully - but really filling your life with beauty. And he said for five minutes a day, look at something beautiful, listen to something beautiful, think of something beautiful.

And I thought, "I'm so stressed, I can't go to a music class, I can't do meditation. " But, perhaps, for five minutes a day, I can manage to do this. So either in the morning before I got up or in a chair at the end of the day, I began to do that: I would breathe deeply - and that was part of it, breathing deeply which leads to relaxation.

I began to think about a beautiful sunset, and I was in an ugly house with an ugly view, and I thought about a lovely pink sunset going off into the fleecy clouds. I thought about a beautiful baby's head. You know how babies have these lovely heads that you want to hold?

I thought about that. And then I would sing - and thank goodness I lived on my own because I've got no voice - but I would sing, "My love is like a red, red rose. " I did that for six months, and one day, I thought, "I'm happy!

" And you know what? I was skydiving. (Laughter) Now, no one could have been more terrified of skydiving than me, originally.

And the way it happened was this, that my students - because I lectured in a college and I taught dance - my students had a charity for disabled children, taking them to the Special Olympics, taking them on different trips, and we had done a carboot sale, a run and a concert - we were running out of money. And I said, "What you need to do is a skydive. " Now, no one could have been more scared than me, but if they were going to do it, I was going to do it.

And there actually was another thread to this. I was 54 years old, and my beautiful, lovely, gentle, talented mother had committed suicide when she was 54. So 54 was always going to be a difficult year for me.

And you know, in a way, what I was doing then - although I was doing it for charity, doing it for another group - I was actually challenging myself to face death, and it was a grieving, and it was another healing. So it really helped me get into enjoying life in a wonderful way. And I had a fantastic time.

I had tents in America, which I used to buy at Walmart and then throw away on the last day. And I'd eat peanut sandwiches and nuts, and that's about all I had. Later on, I managed to get an old trailer, and I lived in that - a wonderful time.

Here we are, in the air, with different people - it was such a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful time. But . .

. I see I faced my fear and found my purpose. And made a difference, because that was only the beginning.

I'd found a passion. But if you have a passion, you begin to overflow with energy, you begin to overflow with love, you have a different view. When you're stressed and unhappy, you become negative about other people.

You become judgmental; things begin to go wrong. Now, because I was so happy and I'd found my passion, I was overflowing with energy and love. So it happened that I eventually started another charity.

And at that time, I was 65 years of age, I'd retired - but I'll tell you about that time in a minute - because I'm enjoying life and I'm skydiving. Now then, I had lots of adventures and misadventures. I mean, I jumped out of airplanes, but I don't know how many times I fell out of an airplane.

I would land - once in a marsh. Once I landed in a rape field that was so tall that I lost my way. I landed in the road with traffic coming along, I dislocated the sign that led to the dropzone - they weren't very pleased about that.

I once stopped all the traffic in an airdrome by sailing graciously and happily across all the runways. (Laughter) I was quite happy, but when I got down to the ground, woah! I have actually been banned twice.

(Laughter) And it wasn't that time - they forgave me of that one. So I could tell you so many things. I mean, I've jumped out of a Hercules into the Wadi Rum desert on my 65th birthday, the first civilians ever to do that, as guests of the King of Jordan.

I've landed on two parachutes - which you shouldn't do. I've had to reserve ride and landed in a desert, trying to miss the cacti, and just managing to miss it, and then finding, when I got back to the dropzone, that one of the team, the German team, was spread-eagled, having all these little pins taken out of him when he'd landed on a cacti. So I was quite pleased that I was better than him - I'd managed not to.

Very quickly, I will talk, perhaps, about one I did in Arizona - lovely place to jump because the weather's always wonderful - you start at 8 in the morning, finish at 8 at night, and you just skydive. Now, I was doing a jump - and your altimeter is your lifeline. I looked at my altimeter; it's about 4,000 feet - plenty of time - I thought it's time to pull my ripcord and let my parachute come out.

But when I did that, there were lots of twists in it. Now, that's alright, because you can kick out of the twists, that's okay, but I went kicking out of the twists, and then ground was getting a bit closer, and the light was getting a bit brighter, and I still hadn't kicked out of all of them. So I realized I better do something else about it.

So I thought, "Now, I've got to release my parachute, so my reserve comes out" - that's a technique we can use - and you know, the week before, I'd read about a woman my age - I was 64 then - who had actually had the same accident, and hadn't managed to deploy her parachute, and she went in. So there I was pulling away, knowing that I was getting lower and lower. And the amazing thing is this - it has changed my life - I actually didn't feel fear.

The ground was coming up, the light was getting brighter, and I thought to myself, "I've been through this door again. " And it didn't matter, it wasn't afraid, it was alright, it was quite alright, but my survival for life, my instinct for life was more, and I gave an almighty pull, and a little yellow handkerchief opened up above my head - because the reserves are much smaller than the main ones - and within seconds it seemed, I landed on the rubble of the cotton field, and I was safe, and I felt that my knees were knocking a little bit, and I didn't go back again until the next day, when they managed to put a plastic sheath around the lines, because you could see the scorch marks where they'd been so tightly twisted. Okay, so now then, let's just move on a little bit because .

. . that little girl in a striped top is me - fearful, shivering, afraid.

Now, my father was a wonderful man. He was quite a frail man, but he would climb through a three-story building so that he could tar it because he couldn't afford to do anything else. And he would always say to me, "Don't be afraid, Dilys.

" He taught me to ride a bike; he taught me to climb trees; he taught me not to be afraid of bullies. And he would say to me, "Dilys, if you fall off your bike, get back on and do wheelies. " And I've always lived with that.

And even now, if something goes wrong or I get scared or afraid or depressed, and I think, "Get on my bike, Dilys, and do wheelies. " And it always works. He taught me courage.

My mother, my lovely mother, taught me about beauty. But both of them taught me about compassion, because they had given their lives to work in a Christian commune. And in that commune, they looked after children who were without parents, because it was the time of the war and there were missionaries' children who were separated from their parents.

And we had Jewish children who were refugees from Nazi Germany. And I still remember now their lovely faces, standing there, with great big labels pinned to them. And these lovely, lovingly packed trunks full of beautiful clothes that their parents had put for them.

And many of them never saw their parents again. In fact, that little girl, Christina, she was a missionaries' child, and her parents were killed in a coup, and she never saw them again. So, I had such love from my parents for me, but also they showed me about love.

So I suppose it was no surprise that I actually want the playing field to be more equal for everyone, that I really emphasize with those who've drawn the shortest straw in life. And so, I used to teach dance to my students, to adults, to children, but also to children with special needs. And I devised a program which really made connection, because the most disabled children and adults are isolated from the good things of life.

I'd like to have taken them on a skydive, but I realized that probably was not going to pass the health and safety. So the next best thing was a program which is music and movement and color - it's a multisensory program - and it was for these beautiful people, beautiful, beautiful people I gained so much from, in terms of courage and love and friendship. And having found that this program worked, I thought we've got to find a beautiful place for our friends, not the back of a kitchen lift in a drafty old sportscenter smelling of gym shoes, which it used to be in the old days - it's a lot better now - but a beautiful place where they can feel they are one with us.

And, amazingly, we ended up in the Wales Millennium Centre. Okay, the Wales Millennium Centre - going from nothing, going from my kitchen table with no money at all, to nearly half a million turnover, a thousand people - because we've licensed the program - take part in this program every week, and it goes from strength to strength. We do it throughout Wales, we do it in Scotland; we've got to go to the world.

And I will tell you a little bit more about this lovely young girl. Now, this lovely young girl, her name is Luna, and when she came to us, the social worker said she needs to come to us to give her parents a break. The parents had adopted her; they were just unbelievable.

Now, when Luna came, she was like this. She would cover herself, and she would rock. And she would bang herself till she bled.

She couldn't join a group session; we had her on her own. And we thought, "I don't think we're going to connect. " But, you know, a session leader who was a singer with the Welsh National Opera sang to her.

And as he sang to her . . .

she looked up, she let the material slip away, just for moments, and I knew we've connected. And over the years, she became - she used to do little finger dances, she began to join in. Instead of making one sound, she was like a Mongolia singer and made many, many sounds.

She even went to rehearsal in the Wales Millennium Centre and stopped the National Opera because she made so much sound that the conductor couldn't hear the soloist. (Laughter) And, you know, it's a multisensory - (Applause) And you see, we use the best of everything; we believed in excellence. (Bell rings) So we would use sound, we would stroke, we would massage and touch with love.

And it began to make a difference because if someone connects and cares, and if you're given the best of everything, things will change. So we have a wonderful, wonderful time. Now then, look at this.

(Video) Dilys: I think sometimes we get pulled down by fear, we get pulled down by necessity of work, and it's a mistake. But having done skydive, I learned courage; I learned to go. And that has been the biggest turning point in my life.

And I think that courage has helped me to run a charity, which from scratch is very difficult - and they say most charities fail after three years. And I knew that I had a program that affected, for the good, very profoundly disabled people, made them really much happier, and that thrills me. I believe we all have a purpose in life, and I believe the Touch Trust is my purpose.

So, that's just a little bit about that because it's very important. It has taught me things: If you want the good life, you need to overcome fear, you need to find a passion. But more than that, you need to recognize that we have two instincts: We're hard-wired to survive, but we're also hard-wired to serve, and that gives us the good life, which is a wonderful win-win situation.

And, you know, without skydiving, I wouldn't have had the courage to start a charity. But I thought, "If I could skydive, well, I have got enough courage to face all the difficulties of running a charity. " So, to finish off, be kind.

Give love. Have fun. Dance.

Be physical. Don't be afraid. Help others.

Find a passion. So, here I am. I'm not dead yet, okay?

This is just the beginning - I know that even at my age, to have the good life, I need to face fear, I need to rekindle or find a new passion, and in fact, for me, this is just the beginning. The Touch Trust program, which I created, has gone through Wales, through Scotland, but it hasn't gone abroad. And so my new business is taking the program to the world.

Thank you.