Selfish Sister Scheduled Her Baby Shower On My Wedding Day, Expecting Support, But....-Reddit Family

selfish sister scheduled her baby shower on my wedding day expecting support but karma struck as family chose my wedding over hers I've come here to vent because I'm angry about the incident that happened a few days ago the fact that my older sister Porsche 30f has a lot of main character energy irritates me in every manner since I've never been one to start arguments or drama this has been the standard in both her and my lives and I've usually never voiced my objections or said anything but when she chose to throw her fourth child's baby

shower on the same day as my wedding it all came to a head naturally I was devastated to learn of it just a few days prior to the wedding I knew this small coincidence as she described it was intentional on her part because I had forced my family to RSVP to The Wedding Date months in advance all it did was make me want to tear out her hair or mine since my family has always done things that way I had a persistent suspicion that they would choose to attend her baby shower rather than my wedding

for as long as I can remember she has always been the Golden Child and I have always been the afterthought I had hoped that this day would be about me but I knew she was going to steal even this day from me because of her baby shower I don't have the finest relationship with Porsche 25f I would largely blame Porsche's attitude and haughtiness but I would also credit my parents upbringing in school Porsche was an overachiever she participated in sports excelled academically and was well-liked by her peers and instructors her parents were quite proud of

her that being said I was only mediocre AC emically I wasn't very good but I wasn't awful either my parents said that I had no relevant hobbies and the fact that I attended the same school as my sister only made this worse because I was so different from Porsche not just in attitude but also in abilities all of my teachers including the principal used to be pretty shocked that we were sisters we were compared all the time and I was never good enough my parents were not pleased with my lack of abilities my favorite kid

was Porsche because she was a bright child she was treated pampered and had everything done for her as a child I was informed unequivocally that if I become as good as Porsche my parents would treat me the same way because of my early years I have a number of psychological problems with self-worth which have negatively affected my quality of life I Knew by the time I was 13 that I would never be able to have a healthy and productive relationship with my family I simply stopped interacting with the family after accepting that as my reality

I stayed in my room largely kept to myself and Drew for hours on end no one ever took it seriously and it was the only true Pastime I had in a sense I was the extra family member always an afterthought never left alone and always viewed with disdain or disdain because I was not good enough for my parents because I was too preoccupied scribbling to work hard and be a source of Pride for the family like my sister my mother even tore one of my sketch pads calling me a Scribbler at that moment I realized

that no matter what I accomplished they would only regard me as a smaller version of Porsche and that I would never be able B to compete with her even if I tried and I didn't want to I simply ceased communicating with them as much as possible Porsche changed when she went off to college when I was 13 she had changed from being the good girl our parents had brought up without a doubt she continued to do well but she wasted money like crazy refused to return home and never answered their calls my parents I suppose

were affected by all of this and felt secluded and alone after being parents to a single child for 18 years the child suddenly showed little interest in them that's when they started looking at me they made an effort to bond with me and become closer but I didn't want anything to do with it I had been accustomed to being alone myself so all of this attention only made me feel anxious my parents wanted to play happy families so I wasn't going to changed the long period it had taken me to learn how to live alone

this infuriated them and my situation worsened they were always insulting me or yelling at me and I could no longer stand it before attending college I somehow made it through the following several years since then I haven't had much communication with them I can say that all of that doodling paid off because I have a degree in animation I'm doing well for myself and got a decent job right out of college I feel even more smug about the whole situation because this is not what anyone especially my sister and parents anticipated of me over the

past 2 to 3 years they have made numerous attempts to contact me in an attempt to become closer to me and other such things but I have consistently graciously turned them down I am more than content with the small family I have created for myself and no longer feel the need for them in my life I reside with our adorable dog Emma and my fiance Edward 29 months I don't want them to interfere with my wonderful life friends or Social Circle before I started working Porsche got married a few years ago I was obviously not

invited this is also one of the reasons I don't think their efforts to get back in touch are very sincere when I was just a student they didn't give a damn about me but now that I'm successful they're trying to be family and make amends I am not one to be duped by their evil mask and I can see right through it I suspect that they are merely trying to reconnect with me in order to take advantage of me she got pregnant immediately after graduating from college had a shotgun wedding and has never received a

dime since because Porsche doesn't work the family had always assumed that since she was the smart one she would be the one making the money and that I would fail they are attempting to patch things up so that I can be their Cash Cow now that there is no chance of her giving them any money since the day I was born my parents have been like this my extended family has improved significantly throughout my childhood my aunt Rachel who has constantly criticized my parents for their partiality was like a mother figure to me naturally these

accusations were strongly refuted but over time the entire extended family learned the truth they have encouraged me to maintain minimal communication and no one has put much pressure on me to mend fences with my relatives up until around 3 months ago my mother experienced a pretty significant heal Health crisis the diagnosis was difficult and she spent weeks in the hospital since then her quality of life has suffered greatly and the doctors have stated that it will take a long time for her to get back to her previous state if she ever does my aunt claims

that this served as a wake-up call for my mother she cried for me her baby the whole time she was in the hospital since we had little to no communication for a few years I wasn't informed about her health problems right away however a week after the incident my aunt called to inform me that my mother was very ill and had come to the understanding that she had not treated me well my mother has been crying non-stop since that day pleading with me to contact her again because she knows she will die soon and doesn't

want that to happen before I give her another chance to be a decent mother I had struggled with this because I knew in my heart that my mother's desire to make amend stem solely from her need to avoid taking the blame for mistreating her own kid it had less to do with me and more to do with her remorse however I was also aware that I would regret not speaking with her or at the very least getting in touch with her again so after giving it some serious thinking and receiving a lot of encouragement from

my aunt and my fiance I made the decision to try it again and contact her for us it was emotional she shed many tears and apologized profusely but I simply told her to forget it and that I no longer wanted to discuss or interact with her about it my father and I didn't speak for more than a few words since he wanted to be polite and is Too Proud to own his mistakes during this brief reunion Porsche was not present and I later learned that this was at our mother's wish during our conversation ation mom

had strongly disputed Porsche's presence and I've heard she was really upset about it but she was unable to stop it and now for the real thing after the first few meetings I must admit that I did not have much time for my mother because I was so busy with all of my wedding preparations I could have but I also wanted some Leisure and was too stressed out from the heavy workload even after our alleged reconciliation my parents were angry that I had not included them in the wedding planning process or assigned them any of the

customary responsibilities that the bride's parents are expected to fulfill even though my mother was unhappy about the whole thing she decided to ignore it which is when I started to think that perhaps she was truly sorry in contrast my father was Furious that he would not be the one to accompany me down the aisle he even gave me a call to let me know that I was making him look like a bad father in front of everyone so he was thinking of skipping the wedding I informed him that nothing had returned to normal particularly between

us even after everything had he was also allowed to do anything he chose which included not knowing if he thought this was too offensive that immediately silenced him and he remained silent thereafter I didn't communicate with her at all during this period regarding Porsche she indicated that she would be attending and I had just sent out the invitations I reasoned that there was nothing else to discuss with her but I was going to have a big surprise my cousin Lena called me in a panic two weeks prior to my wedding she told me that she

was speaking with Porsche and that Porsche had asked her to attend her baby shower in the same city on on the same day as my wedding at a location she had reserved an hour away it seems that she was phoning folks to the baby shower Without Really sending out invitations because she was afraid I might hear about it Lena said that she was positive and that some other family members had already received the invitation when I asked her whether she was certain about it and if she might have been wrong additionally she was allegedly making

a big deal out of it claiming that she wanted everyone to come because this was her and her husband's last child and that it mattered even more to her I was incensed when I learned I questioned her whether this was real over the phone right away she claimed that she believed it was the greatest way to incorporate our enjoyment because she knew she wouldn't be able to bring the whole family together until after my wedding I should be happy that her baby gets to celebrate and attend my wedding in spirit she stated since she did

it on my wedding day not even a day before or after I told her that she was insane and a spiteful witch I also reminded her that she should have inquired or notified me if she truly had good intentions just 2 days before my wedding I was learning about about it from someone else which revealed to me what she was planning to do and how insane she was she informed me that she was free to celebrate her baby whenever she pleased that I had no right to call her names and that I had no control

over the date or what other people chose to do she asserted that I had no authority to prevent guests from attending her baby shower or traveling to my wedding if they so desired I hate to confess it but I had a full-blown mental breakdown and was completely at a loss for words I simply couldn't handle the facts and was inconsolable even though he was angry Edward who was with me knew just what to say we made the decision that everyone we had invited would receive a note we made an effort to appear as kind as

we could and the message said something like how we discovered that the dates had conflicted although we were pleased for Porsche we were aware that some of our guests would have to choose between going to the baby shower and the wedding additionally we informed them that we were not in the mood for any more drama with only two weeks left until the wedding and asked them to confirm their attendance with my maid of honor the wedding is where I would see them I instructed my maid of honor to record everyone who confirmed their attendance so

that we could modify the catering and other arrangements appropriately we would simply go to the courts and be married if everyone decided to come to the baby shower although it may seem like an exaggeration I was certain that most people would prefer to attend her baby shower over my wedding because I had been ignored my entire childhood I'm happy I was shown to be mistaken I asked Zara my ma of Honor 2 days prior to my wedding if anyone had confirmed what the current situation was she simply assured me that everything was under control and

that I shouldn't worry about it I still didn't know how many people had left me for Porsche so her response was not at all reassuring she simply told me to relax and that she would handle everything I was shocked to see nearly every member of my family who I had invited on the wedding day with the exception of Porsche of course my father who I had presumed and my paternal aunt and her family my mother who is not the kind to do things without my father was one of the people who made it which surprised

me greatly the actual wedding proceeded according to plan and I must admit that I was relieved my father wasn't attending he would have created needless drama and pouted the entire time I was therefore rather relieved that he was not there Porsche however was unable to tolerate this affront against her especially since she was not accustomed to it I noticed dad and Porsche arriving at the location as my ceremony was nearing to a conclusion and everyone was leaving for lunch Zara stood up and prevented them from entering the building before I could say anything even though

I couldn't fully understand what they were saying I could tell that they were arguing and that the argument was becoming more heated by the moment Porsche even attempted to force her way inside at one point and Zara did her best to keep her out but my dad also forced through and their combined might was too great for her she burst into tears like a Pampered child the moment Porsche entered it was real crying like a baby not just a few stray tears here and there seeing it was so repulsive and unpleasant I was embarrassed because

she was acting in such a way in front of Edward's family our friends and our Co co-workers even though I knew my family was aware of her shenanigans she insisted that I should have had the grace to postpone my wedding when I knew she was throwing her baby shower and that everyone had come to my wedding rather than her final one before I could respond Rachel claimed that she was the one who had stolen The Wedding Date which I had decided upon months prior she would have been the one to move her baby shower to

a different day if she had any Common Sense Porsche glanced at my dad for support because she didn't anticipate being called out in that manner but he was strangely silent at that point Porsche boldly asserted that although marriages fail frequently and that I might marry again she was definitely not going to become pregnant again I wanted to slap her in the face because I was so angry at the time I was shocked that she had the audacity to imply that my marriage might fail on my wedding day by that point I'd had enough and told

her to leave the stadium immediately I also informed her that she already had three children and that given everything she has done since leaving college and spending all of dad's money there was no Assurance she wouldn't continue to pop out I interrupted her as she began to yell telling her that she was a terrible person who only ever considered herself I told her that I felt bad for her children since they had such a bad mother she quickly stopped talking after that and began crying once more but I couldn't stand it she was physically hauled

out of the venue by Zara and another friend of mine she had destroyed my day and by the time it was all over I was crying and shivering nearly everyone ended their lunch early and left because of the uncomfortable environment the thing that wounded me the most was that my mother never spoke up for me or informed me of Porsche's plans during all of this time therefore in my opinion her reconciliation was a phony in an act because even though she had the opportunity she still failed to treat me fairly Edward pulled me close and

assured me that it wasn't my fault at all and that I would eventually hit my breaking point I sobbed hugged him and apologized for spoiling the day after everyone had left people have been contacting me for the past 5 days since our wedding but I am not in the right frame of mind to reply I know I will ultimately have to reply to all of the messages that are currently sitting in my inbox but I don't want to do that right now tomorrow we're heading out on our honeymoon so I'm hoping I can get better

and forget about whatever occurred I can't let my disgusting sister spoil my honeymoon anymore than she did my wedding which I was unable to stop even after all these years she still has no power to influence me in this way update one hello Reddit during my honeymoon I took a vacation from Reddit which is why I haven't been updating when I saw all of the comments I was overwhelmed since I hadn't anticipated the post to become so popular but I read them all here's a quick update because you're suddenly so interested in the narrative Ed

and I didn't really consider any kind of communication with my side of the family on our honeymoon despite my mother's repeated attempts to contact me I just informed her that I will speak with her after returning from my honeymoon since then she has called to apologize for not standing up for me at the wedding and to express her remorse saying she wants to meet with me she knew about the baby shower but chose not to tell me so I explained that this was about more than simply the wedding she said she hoped people would attend

my wedding over the baby shower anyhow and didn't want me to be sad I informed her that she had once again demonstrated her unreliability particularly with regard to my sentiments and emotions and that her presumptions did not justify what she had done to me she apologized again but I urged her to stop contacting me and that I needed some time apart from her I told her that she had chosen to re-enter my life in order to show me that she was sorry even though she attempted to to use the I'm sick excuse her actions however

have demonstrated the opposite to me as she still chooses Porsche before me even if it means ruining one of the most significant days of my life I felt terrible for tearing into her as she was sobbing uncontrollably but I knew I couldn't allow her to run all over me once more I couldn't let her return with her similar Antics and ruin everything because it had taken me years and years to feel mentally safe I informed her that although I would be contacting her I would do it at my own pace and that I did not

want her to put any pressure on me to start dating her because it was obvious that she was not ready I believe she thought she could use victimization to get me to give in but when that didn't work she handed the phone to Dad whom I had no desire to speak to I hung up the phone as soon as I heard him on the line when that I blocked him when he wrote me a lengthy text that I didn't even bother to read other than that I only received texts from family members expressing their regret

that Porsche had attempted to overshadow me at my own wedding and essentially offering their support and sympathy even if I haven't answered them all I will overall the whole experience has made me feel a lot better and I'm happy that I've broken off contact with my mother once more I don't want my parents to destroy the family I've created for myself and I don't have the energy to cope with them update two it's obvious that the drama is still going on even though I had assumed it had ended Jake the spouse of Porsche showed up

at my house last night I called him inside because he appeared rather forlorn and I didn't have the courage to turn him away he apologized to me right away claiming He was unaware Porsche had been plotting this that's when I remembered that I didn't see Jake at my wedding for the entire episode when I asked him what he meant he explained that she had demanded that the date be changed because he had really scheduled Porsche's baby shower for a week after my wedding she also explained to him that she wanted to hold the baby shower

on the same day as the wedding because I hadn't invited them he disagreed saying that since we had been apart for a while she shouldn't have been anticipating an invitation in the first place he claimed that he would have been shocked if I had invited them and that he never tried to get clarification from me since he thought it was reasonable that I hadn't he was embarrassed to learn the truth about what had truly transpired that day and he only learned it because my mother informed him he inquired if there was anything he could do

to improve the situation overall and expressed his sincere regret saying he wanted to apologize on her behalf I informed him that his wife was an adult who was capable of accepting responsibility for her own conduct and that he had no need to apologize because he was not present I told her that if she didn't apologize it didn't mean anything and that she needed to learn to accept responsibility for her actions I thanked him for getting in touch and assured him that I had nothing against him and that he seemed like a wonderful man although I

think it was kind of him to visit and speak with us his wife's actions still stand to be honest I am aware that I will not forgive her even if she were to apologize in the future now that she has dug her grave she can rest in it update three Jake and Porsha are on the verge of getting a divorce it seems that they had been at odds for a while and her actions at my wedding were the final straw she has been running around accusing me of being the cause of her divorce but I

suppose that everyone has had enough of her shenanigans and is no longer prepared to put up with her self-pitying rant it had been made clear that this would only be a temporary Arrangement but the last I heard she was going to move in with Mom and Dad she even contacted me to offer to watch her children for free claiming that this would be my way of making amends for destroying her life I don't want to get involved in this drama any longer so I immediately blocked her everywhere although I am unaware of the specifics of

their divorce I am aware that Jake is attempting to obtain sole custody of all the children because he believes she gives them an unsuitable and unstable environment in which to grow up although I am unsure of the outcome of their divorce I am aware that she is in tremendous difficulties and that no one is currently prepared to assist her so it's unclear what will happen I've completely bowed out of this whole mess and consequently my family that's all I know I lived a quiet and contented existence before they made the decision to contact me again

and this is far more bother than their worth my aunt Rachel and a couple of my cousins are the only members of my family who I currently choose to be around because they were there for me during the whole wedding disaster I have the utmost gratitude for their unwavering support I'm going to be extremely protective of my boundaries going forward since they are the only people who deserve to be in my life thank you for watching if you haven't subscribed yet please do so and hit the notification Bell to stay updated with more shocking real

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