welcome to Lost relation Chronicles before we start today's Story please let us know your location in the comment section and don't forget to like And subscribe now let's start with today's story my name is James Smith and my story like so many others who wear the uniform is one of Pride pain and transformation growing up I idolized my father a man of few words but strong convictions he was a soldier through and through and I wanted nothing more than to follow in his footsteps the stories he shared those he could D to tell painted a
picture of Duty sacrifice and Brotherhood by the time I graduated high school there was no doubt in my mind about what I wanted to do with my life joining the Army felt natural like stepping into shoes that had always been waiting for me I trained hard pushed my limits and eventually earned the coveted Ranger tab The Pride I felt when I completed that gruelling training was Indescribable I was part of something bigger than myself a tightly knit group of men and women who lived by the Creed Rangers lead the way my deployment to Iraq was
a blur of heat dust and adrenaline every Mission demanded everything we had and then some we operated in conditions that tested not only our physical endurance but our mental strength the friendships forged in those intense moments were unbreakable cemented by shared hardships and victories we counted on each other to survive and that Bond became my anchor in a world that often seemed chaotic but War leaves its Mark and not everyone walks away and scathed on what seemed like just another mission everything changed the IED blast came without warning a sudden eruption that shattered the ground
beneath us I remember the Searing pain the ringing in my ears and the chaos that followed I was lucky if you can call it that the injuries I sustained meant my days as a ranger were over but I was alive and I had the chance to build a future beyond the battlefield retirement from the Army was bittersweet I had lived and breathed that life for so long that stepping away felt like losing a part of myself but I knew I had to move forward the GI Bill became my lifeline offering me a path to something
new I threw myself into my studies with the same determination that had carried me through ranger training engineering caught my interest the problem solving the Innovation the chance to create rather than destroy it felt like a form of redemption College wasn't easy I was older than most of my classmates and carried experiences they couldn't begin to understand but I found my groove leaning on discipline and focus hone during my time in the military slowly but surely I earned my degree and stepped into the world as an engineer it was around this time that I met
Susan Carter she was working the front desk at an auto dealership when our paths crossed I had come in to look at a truck nothing fancy just something reliable Susan caught my eye immediately there was something about her a warmth a confidence that made it impossible not to notice she had this easy way of talking to people making everyone feel seen and heard it didn't take long for me to find excuses to come back back even when I didn't need anything for the truck we got married a couple of years later building a life filled
with dreams and shared moments my father passed away not long after our wedding leaving behind his house and a life insurance policy worth $200,000 the house was valued at another $300,000 a generous inheritance that changed our circumstances Susan and I decided to move into the house at that time I was working as a trainer for a local auto manufacturer my job took me across the country visiting service centers and conducting training sessions it meant being on the road frequently one sunny afternoon I was returning home from one such training as I drove into the city
familiar sights came into view that's when I saw Susan's car it caught me by surprise she hadn't mentioned being out I slowed down and followed her discreetly curiosity and a tinge of unease swirling in my chest she pulled into the parking lot of a motel my grip tightened on the steering wheel as I watched her park my instincts told me something wasn't right I inched closer debating whether to confront her or wait that's when a man stepped out of a nearby car he walked confidently towards Susan and together they went inside I was frozen my
heart pounding in my chest as I gripped the steering will so tightly my Knuckles turned white a wave of Rage swept through me raw and unforgiving my first instinct was to storm inside and beat the guy senseless but I knew where that would land me in a jail cell with my life unraveling even further I forced myself to stay put breathing hard trying to R in the chaos inside my head Susan wasn't being forced into anything there was no hesitation no fear on her face only certainty she was there willingly and that realization hit me
harder than any punch I'd ever taken I needed to know more I had to understand why she was here what this betrayal meant for the life we had built together so I waited ignoring the nagging voice in my head urging me to confront her minutes dragged by stretching into hours as I sat there my thoughts bouncing between disbelief and anger finally the door opened they walked out together side by side laughing like there wasn't a care in the world and then I saw it that kiss it wasn't a quick guilty peck it was long passionate
the kind of Kiss I thought was reserved for us my stomach churned as I watched them pull away and head to their separate cars I couldn't move couldn't think all I could do was sit there a storm of emotions swirling inside me as they drove off in opposite directions like nothing had ever happened I drove home in a fog my mind spinning with questions and scenarios I didn't want to believe were real my jaw was clenched so tightly I could barely breathe through the knot in my chest by the time I pulled into the driveway
I thought I had stealed myself but seeing Susan waiting inside still sent a jolt through me she was dressed like always casual effortlessly put together there was nothing unusual about her demeanor she smiled when she saw me her eyes warm and familiar as though nothing had changed hey you're back she leaned in to give me a small peck on the cheek how was your trip it was fine I said flatly fighting to keep my voice steady I just made some coffee want to join me she offered motioning toward the kitchen yeah in a minute I
need to hit the bathroom first I muttered forcing a casual tone I walked briskly down the hall my pulse thundering in my ears in the bathroom I SP spotted her laundry in the corner jeans and a simple blouse neatly folded but when I picked them up the faint but unmistakable scent hit me it wasn't her perfume it was a man's cologne musky and sharp my stomach Twisted as the truth settled like lead in my gut they hadn't just met for coffee I clenched my jaw swallowing the bitter bile of betrayal and forced myself to change
into fresh clothes I had to keep my composure at least for now when I walked back to the kitchen Susan was already sipping her coffee her posture relaxed I took a seat across from her and poured myself a cup pretending to be interested in the swirling steam so I began my voice calm despite the tension in my chest what did you do today she smiled completely unaware of the Trap she was walking into oh the usual ran a couple of errands got groceries did some work on the computer nothing too exciting I nodded slowly letting
the silence stretch just long enough to be uncomfortable that all yeah she said looking slightly puzzled why I leaned forward locking eyes with her my voice colder now you missed the part where you were at the Golden Drive motel with a blonde man Susan gasped her eyes widening for a brief moment before narrowing with resignation so you saw me she said flatly without a hint of guilt or surprise yeah I confirmed my voice hard is steel you and that man in that room I leaned closer each word cutting through the air you cheated on me
Susan she didn't Flinch didn't cry or apologize instead she sighed as if relieved some burden had finally been lift it I knew someday you'd find out her calm demeanor made my skin crawl that's it I spat incredulous you knew I'd find out and it doesn't even bother you she folded her hands on the table eyes steady his name is Jason she said as though introducing me to an old friend my ex-boyfriend I just I can't get over him my jaw clenched fists tightening on the edge of the table you can't get over him I echoed
bitterly what the hell does that even mean you married me Susan we broke up when he left me for another girl she said matter of factly as if reciting ancient history but it's not romantic between us anymore I laughed Darkly shaking my head in disbelief oh right so meeting at motels is just what catching up over coffee no her voice was firm but disturbingly calm it's just sex that's all it's ever been I felt the ground shift beneath me anger boiling in my chest just sex I repeated bitterly you think that makes it better HEK
still single she continued as if that detail mattered he works as an electrician at the local Sawmill I stared at her completely numb struggling to process the Casual way she spoke about it a year ago she went on you were on your way to the airport when Jason called I swear James it was the first time I'd heard from him in ages I promise her promises felt like ash in my mouth he had a room at the motel and invited me over to talk she said her voice steady I went talk I snapped that what
you're calling it now she ignored my Outburst he asked about me so I told him everything how we met fell in love got married then she hesitated for the first time her voice dropping just slightly we started having sex I clenched my fist so tightly my Knuckles went white how long I demanded my voice dangerously low a year she said bluntly meeting my eyes without a trace of Shame a year I echoed stunned the realization shattered something inside me my voice exploded you've been cheating on me for the last one year Susan's voice was disturbingly
calm as though we were discussing what to have for dinner I've never given you sloppy seconds or anything like that she said casually as if that should somehow make it better if you want tonight I'll give you a BJ I stared at her stunned into silence and I'll admit she continued completely oblivious to the rage simmering inside me I like his rough way of having sex with me but he's no threat to us I promise no threat no threat who the hell was this woman the person sitting in front of me wasn't the Susan I
thought I knew I felt like I was looking at a stranger cold detached Unapologetic and she clearly had no idea who I was either my voice was like ice cutting through the tint air I'm sorry you think cheating with Jason is something I can just forget about or put up with but no Susan I leaned forward my words sharp and deliberate it does affect me it affects our marriage her expression didn't waver as though she were waiting for me to finish my little speech I will not live with a cheater I declared firmly I'll sleep
in the spare room tonight and tomorrow I'm seeing an attorney Susan leaned back in her chair Crossing her legs with an air of indifference well she said let me explain what will happen if you file for a divorce this is a no fault state she began with a smirk Youk be forced to sell this house and split the money equally with me her eyes gleamed as she added I know how much this place means to you your father gave you this house didn't he I clenched my fists under the table my jaw tightening the $200,000
in the bank she continued smoothly I'll take half of that too the nerve of this woman and since I don't work you'll be paying me alimony might even can get half of that big salary of yours she leaned in slightly her voice dropping to a sickeningly sweet tone what I do with Jason right now that's not hurting you my blood boiled but she wasn't finished but after the divorce she grinned wickedly Youk end up paying me while I keep having sex with Jason it's a win-win for me James and all loss for you so you
better think long and hard before you make a big mistake I stood up without a word my chest tight with rage and disbelief the audacity she wasn't just unrepentant she was reving in it Susan barely glanced at me as I walked away heading back into the kitchen humming to herself like nothing had happened I moved quickly Gathering my clothes for the next day and carrying them into the spare bedroom my head was pounding thoughts swirling in a chaotic mess once inside I shut the door with a quiet but firm click then I locked it lying
in the spare bed I stared at the ceiling my mind racing sleep was impossible then I heard Susan's Voice through the wall low but clear enough to recognize she was on the phone yeah Jenny he found out she said laughing softly he was all serious and hurt like what does he expect Jason's just better in bed my teeth clenched that Jenny knew too I had invited her over for dinner just last month clueless that she was probably in on this whole thing I turned over fuming not once during our conversation had Susan said she was
sorry not once had she even suggested suggested ending things with Jason her solution was for me to keep funding her lifestyle while she continued screwing him as if I'd ever agree to that if I accepted it I'd be a that word burned in my head like acid no way not going to happen the next morning I was up Before Dawn my decision made I grabbed my keys and drove to McDonald's needing coffee and something hot to calm my nerves the greasy breakfast sandwich didn't do much for my appetite but at least I wasn't running on
an empty stomach by 9:00 a.m. I was at work sitting stiffly at my desk I picked up the phone my thumb hovering over the keypad I made the call to an attorney's office I need to make an appointment for today I said bluntly the receptionist scheduled me for 1:00 p.m. after hanging up I felt a mix of relief and Dread Susan had been right unfortunately the attorney didn't sugarcoat it in this state he said leaning forward with a sympathetic smile Youk have to split the marital assets and likely pay alimony given her lack of employment
and since this is a no fault state infidelity won't affect the settlement I clenched my jaw but nodded through the conversation taking in every painful detail when I walked out of that office I knew Susan's smug little speech wasn't just taunting it was the brutal truth back at work I sat at my desk staring blankly at email I had no interest in Reading I needed a plan a way to get Susan out of my life without losing absolutely everything the solution hit me like a jolt of caffeine it wasn't perfect it would hurt me sure
but it would be worth it to get rid of her I stood up grabbed my phone and headed straight for the boss's office I sat across from my boss feeling the weight of everything crashing down on me he leaned forward his expression concerned but understanding you sure about this James he asked you've been solid here for 5 years hate to see you go I appreciate that sir I said my voice steady despite the storm in my chest but I've got to handle some personal stuff right now it's not something I can balance with work he
nodded slowly sighing divorce is rough seen a few guys go through it here office assistant will help with your 401k doesn't sound like much but it's yours thanks I muttered feeling a bitter twist in my gut a few minutes later the assistant handed me the paperwork to withdraw my funds 5 years of effort boiled down to a pathetic sum but it was something the boss ever decent handed me my last paycheck in cash take care James he said patting me on the back Youk land on your feet I nodded swallowing the lump in my throat
thanks for everything next stop the bank I stro in with purpose determined to secure my future before Susan could ruin it how can I help you today the teller asked politely I need to withdraw from my savings account I said sliding my ID across the counter the full balance her eyes widened slightly that's a substantial amount sir are you sure I'm sure I confirmed after some verification she handed over the withdrawal slip for me to sign moments later I had $200,000 in my possession cash in neatly bundled Stacks Susan would never know the account had
always been in my name untouched since I started saving the next morning I went straight to the mortgage office every step calculated I need a $300,000 mortgage on my property I told the banker she raised an eyebrow but nodded letun look at your eligibility the paperwork took time but by the end of the meeting I had secured the loan since the house was solely under my name there was no legal requirement for Susan to sign or even be notified she would never know I drove home my hands gripping the steering wheel every second feeling like
it was pulling me deeper into the web I was weaving the mortgage money was with me now all in cash as I parked in the driveway I felt a sick sense of control wash over me inside the house Susan had no idea what I was doing I'd been living in the spare bedroom for days locking the door each night shutting myself off from everything I had a plan and I wasn't going to let anything or anyone distract me the next morning I made a phone call that I knew would set things in motion Javier Mendes
a name I hadn't mentioned in years but someone who could help me in ways I never thought I'd turn to I Knew Javier from my time in the Army we were both there both part of that IED explosion in Iraq it left scars on both of us in different ways I got out and built a life as an engineer but Javier well his path was darker he'd slipped into the world of organized crime trafficking drugs pulling jobs that made him feared I never saw him as a mobster back then but that's who he had become
that evening I walked into the bar where I knew he'd be the place smelled of stale beer in desperation the kind of place no one goes unless they're looking for something Javier's men were scattered around their eyes sharp watching everyone who entered I moved through the crowd my heart pounded in my chest when I saw him sitting in the corner my breath caught he was older harder now but still the guy I knew my buddy from the Army his eyes locked on me his men stepped forward but with one quick glance Javier waved them back
he got up from the table his arms wide and before I knew it he was pulling me into a hug James he exclaimed his voice booming in the bar it's been too long man I told him everything the anger I'd been bottling up poured out raw and unfiltered as I explained how Susan had been seeing a man named Jason working at the local Mill I could feel the tension in the air as I spoke knowing I was walking down a dangerous path but at this point I didn't care I just needed it all to end
Javier didn't interrupt me just listened with a cold calculating expression on his face after a long silence he raised his hand to stop me say no more he said his voice calm but firm this Friday I'll take care of things his words sent a shivered down my spine but I tried to keep my composure what will you do to him I asked though I already had an inkling he smiled a dark knowing grin that sent a chill down my back I'll let him decide his fate he said his tone almost like he was saving the
thought I swallowed my mind racing but I didn't argue Javier wasn't someone you questioned he leaned back in his chair taking a long drag from his cigarette before asking so where are you headed next I paused I hadn't even thought that far ahead I don't know yet I replied Javier nodded like he was expecting that answer he pulled out his phone and made a few quick calls his voice low and sharp as he arranged something when he hung up he looked at me Thursday you board a flight to Mexico you'll pick up a new passport
at the airport I've got a guy who will hook you up with everything you need a new identity a fresh start but it'll cost you he said his eyes narrowing slightly 50 Grand I'll pay the Mexican officials and cover for the tickets but you'll need to pay me up front I reached into my jacket pocket and pulled out the cash I had more than enough and at this point it felt like my only option I handed it over to him without hesitation Javier pocketed the money counting it briefly before slipping it into his jacket he
gave me a nod of approval good you're set get to the airport Thursday the rest is handled I stood up feeling a strange mixture of relief and dread the path I was choosing was irreversible but it was the the only way out of this mess I thanked him keeping my voice steady despite the storm of emotions inside Javier gave me a small almost amused nod don't thank me yet James we'll see how things go with that I Turned and Left stepping back into the world I was about to abandon for good I woke up to
the soft light streaming Through the Windows as I got up I could feel it in my bones today would be the day I had to face Susan I found her sitting at the kitchen table when I walked in she was already waiting for me as if she knew this moment was coming there was no way out now no more avoiding it I stepped into the kitchen and started making myself a cup of coffee trying to keep my movements slow and controlled not letting my anger boil over just yet I sat down across from her with
my cup in hand taking a sip to steady myself her eyes were on me waiting for something an apology an explanation maybe just a reaction you didn't make me a cup she said her voice soft almost playful like she was trying to turn this into some normal conversation I smiled but it wasn't a pleasant one there are a lot of things that you did without me why not get used to this her eyes flickered and she leaned forward a little her tone more serious I told you Jason and I aren't taking away anything from you
I'm still your wife you always wanted a family right when the time comes I'll make sure only you become the father I'll give you everything you want this was her trying to justify what she had done trying to convince me it was all just some side thing nothing that should affect us but it did affect me it affected everything I leaned back in my chair staring at her for a moment trying to keep my cool I want a faithful wife can you give that to me she sighed like she was already bored with this conversation
come on James don't be stubborn I love only you Jason is just a means to satisfy some of my certain desires I interrupted her my voice sharp desires that your husband cannot fulfill she looked at me like I was being ridiculous no it's just different with him you're gentle he's rough I felt the anger rising in me but I kept my voice steady though it was hard so you like to be used as a street hooker should have told me earlier I would have made some money from it she stared at me shocked for a
moment and then her face turned red shut up James I am no hooker she screamed her voice full of outrage well you getting screwed by men in cheap motels hookers do that all the time you have James right now maybe in a few months you find Chad then Tyrone then maybe someone else maybe then some other desires emerge inside you and you to screw someone else you are still young people will pay good money for another four or 5 years then they will move to a much younger option you might as well start now if
you want a career from it my words were dipped in venom she was frustrated and got up don't blame me when I wreck you in court I finished my coffee and said I wish you all the best I will not blame you for anything now before I leave for the day I just like to tell you that I used to love you I used to think I am the luckiest man on earth I used to think we were made for each other but Susan the problem is I used to you made sure of it then
I left the house that night I walked back into the house I saw a note on the kitchen table it said since you were so disrespectful in the morning I decided that I will spend the night having sex with James if you mind to hell with you I will continue with my Arrangement no matter what you say if you want to divorce me be my guest your loving wife Susan the signature to the letter your loving wife Susan it was very ironic that a loving wife was letting her dear husband know that she had gone
out to cheat in him she wasn't just cheating on me she was rubbing my face in it she thought she could control this situation that she could break me but all she did was show how far she'd Fallen if you mind to hell with you she was already so far gone so deep into her mess that she didn't even care how it would end for either of Us by the time the sun started Rising I called a cap my car was already sold and by the time Susan came back she'd find nothing but the empty
house not a car in the driveway not a trace of Me no clue where I'd gone no way to follow me the cab ride to the airport felt surreal it felt like I was walking away from a nightmare I stepped out of the cab and glanced at the terminal ahead I felt a strange peace settling over me as I walked through the doors my mind finally quieting I didn't know what the future held but I knew this was the end of that chapter Susan had made her choice but she would never know what happened and
how it happened I boarded the flight and when I landed in Mexico everything felt like it was happening too fast too surreal I had no idea what would come next but I was already too far gone to turn back I followed the instructions I'd been given and soon enough I met the immigration officer who was supposed to take care of everything he didn't say much just motioned for me to follow him into the men's washroom there he handed me a new passport no questions asked no hesitation my new name was Alistair the officer also handed
me a plane ticket to Thailand and a small file and gave me a quick smile all the best he said then added you'll meet bu outside the airport he'll help you I didn't know who bua was but I didn't need to I was on my way and that was all that mattered the next thing I knew I was boarding another flight to Bangkok the hours stretched on my body aching from the long journey I hadn't slept much too wrapped up in my own thoughts but when I finally landed in Thailand I spotted around chubby guy
waiting for me his name was bua Alister he asked in broken English a big grin on his face as he shook my hand yeah that's me I replied shaking his hand he chuckled clearly happy to see me come I take you to hotel we got into a cab and after a short ride we arrived at a local hide Hotel it wasn't the most luxurious place but it was comfortable and at that moment moment it felt like exactly what I needed don't worry bu said with a smile tomorrow I find you house you can stay here
tonight I nodded grateful thanks I appreciate it the next morning true to his word Buona had everything lined up we want to see a small house near the beach a place that felt like it could be a fresh start I liked it instantly it wasn't big but it was mine this good house bu said you bu I didn't need to think twice I nodded yeah I'll take it by the afternoon the house was mine I couldn't believe how quickly everything had fallen into place it was like I had stepped into a new life without a
second thought the file contained all my qualifications but under the name of Alistair Williams then bu helped me find a job as a head trainer with an automobile company it wasn't exactly what I was used to but it paid well and I didn't care it felt like the perfect way to start over as I stood there looking out at the beach from my new place everything seemed to make sense jav air had been right he had promised me a new start and here I was already living it I smiled to myself thinking of Susan she
would never know what happened two days after I settled into my new life I got a call from Javier the phone rang and the moment I saw his name on the screen I couldn't help but feel a chill run through me it was like I knew what was coming Alistair Javier's voice came through the line low and steady you wanted to know what happened to lover boy I leaned back in my chair my heart pounded ing in my chest yeah what happened you took care of it right Javier paused for a moment and I could
hear the faint sound of someone moving in the background he's gone buddy my boys took him across the border into Mexico you weren't the only one who wanted him gone I knew of two more husbands who wanted him gone I gripped the phone tighter my throat dry what happened to him Javier's voice stayed cold matter of fact they beat him made sure he wouldn't be a problem anymore but that's not all they gave him a choice two bottles one with vodka the other with water both looked the same stupid guy chose the Vodka what do
you mean did he not see Javier sighed like he was reliving it in his mind they didn't tell him he never knew what he was drinking James he took the vodka and then they pushed him out into the Sonoran Desert about 100 Mil from the nearest settlement it was over 110° July heat no water you can guess what happened next I felt a KN form in my stomach the image of Jason stranded in the desert with nothing but his choices haunting me made me sick Jesus so what now Javier's voice softened almost as if he
was savoring the final part his body was found this morning his stomach was full of vodka he didn't make it I sat there the weight of the words pressing down on me I didn't know if I should feel relief or something else part of me felt Vindicated but Another Part Of Me felt something else something darker like the end of something I didn't fully understand thanks I said my voice tight unsure if I meant it Javier was quiet for a moment before he responded his voice turning hard again don't forget why you're here aliser they
pushed you out buddy don't feel bad for them I didn't answer right away what could I say I wasn't going back not to that life not to Susan I was done but I couldn't shake the image of Jason's last moments the hot desert sun and that bottle in his hand his stomach full of vodka damn that would be a nightmare now let's check the story from Susan's side I had been waiting for 3 days not knowing where James had gone the only good part was that I called Jason for a nice afternoon we had some
wild sex in my bed but now I was missing James the house felt colder without him emptier somehow I tried calling him again but it went straight to voicemail I couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong it was like he had just disappeared Jenny called me the second day noticing how Restless I was she could hear in my voice I told her I hadn't heard from James that I had no idea where he was her tone shifted quickly as if she knew I wasn't being completely honest you should call the cops she said her
voice sharp I hesitated gripping the phone tight what would the cops think of me I can't it's just complicated HEK come back Jenny let out a frustrated sigh you're still worried about what people think seriously you should have listened to me when I told you not to get involved with Jason but now you deal with it her words stung but I couldn't blame her she was right I had made this mess and now I was stuck in it still I kept convincing myself James would come back that he'd forgive me I didn't know why I
thought that I just kept holding on to the hope the next day I had to run out to the store I grabbed my purse and James's ATM card the one he had given me for emergencies it had always been there when I needed it a safety net but when I slid the card into the ATM the screen flashed back at me no money I frowned tapping it again thinking it was a mistake but it was the same thing I pulled the card out and went to the bank right away my heart pounding in my chest
the bank manager greeted me his face tight when he saw me I could tell something wasn't right but I didn't know how bad it was yet I asked him if there was a problem with the card he checked the system and then looked up at me his expression unreadable I'm afraid the account is empty ma'am he said slowly as if he was trying to soften the blow there's no money left in account I felt like the ground was slipping out from under me what how that's impossible I managed to choke out desperate for some kind
of explanation he cleared his throat his voice matter of fact but you just took the money from the mortgage full amount of the house I stared at him stunned unable to process the words my mind went blank what do you mean the house is mortgaged why didn't James tell me about any of this the manager's tone softened slightly but his message didn't change he did ma'am the house is mortgaged if you don't have money you'll need to vacate the premises my chest tightened and I felt the walls closing in on me pay I don't have
that kind of money I couldn't even think straight how had I not seen this coming the manager gave me a small sympathetic nod I'm sorry ma'am but the bank Won't Wait beyond the timelines you need to decide pay or vacate the house I felt the blood drain from my face everything was falling apart I had no idea what to do now I tried calling Jason again hoping praying that this time he'd pick up but his phone went straight to voicemail just like James's I didn't know what to do I felt completely lost empty I had
made such a mess of everything and now I had no one to turn to the next morning I couldn't stand the Silence of the house anymore I needed to do something I had to find James I had to fix this but I knew deep down that I was running out of time I couldn't stay like this forever I finally decided to go to the police I walked in the air thick with the weight of my guilt I told them everything about how I had cheated on James with Jason about the note I left about my
Affair as I spoke I could feel the eyes of the officers on me their judgment plain as day they didn't need to say it aloud I could see it in their expressions ma'am we look into this one officer said his voice flat and professional but if you're expecting sympathy I suggest you try somewhere else I knew they didn't believe me that they saw me as the problem I could feel it in the air thick with their disdain they took my formal complaint but it didn't feel like anything had changed 3 weeks passed and nothing no
word on James no sign of Jason it was like they had vanished from my life completely I didn't call Jenny she would just lecture me tell me what an idiot I was for everything that had happened I already knew that I didn't need her to remind me by the fourth week the weight of it all was unbearable I needed to find something anything to hold on to so I found a job at a local bar it was a far cry from the life I had imagined for myself but at least it was something I'd have
my own money my own independence but when I walked into that bar for my first shift the reality hit me hard the men there were crude obnoxious and the way they looked at me made me feel so small it was like they saw nothing but a body to ogal at nothing more I hated it I hated the way they treated me the way I felt like I had no dignity left but but as much as I wanted to walk out of there I couldn't I needed the money I had no other choice so I put
on a smile forced myself to serve the drinks and take their orders all the while trying to block out the sickening feeling in my stomach what had my life come to two months passed and everything I had worked for everything I had built was gone I could not pay for the mortgage the house was sold the money barely enough to get me a tiny room with just a kitchen and a bathroom I would sit in that small space at night staring at the walls listening to the silence and I couldn't stop the tears I cried
so much during those nights I knew I had messed up I had ruined everything I had betrayed James if only I had shared my desires with him if only I had been honest instead of turning to Jason maybe things wouldn't have fallen apart maybe I wouldn't have lost everything that mattered the humiliation at work was unbearable every day felt like an assault on my dignity the way the men looked at me the crude comments they made me feel small like I was nothing more than an object I tried to hold it together to push through
it but each day chipped away at me a little more I didn't know how much longer I could take it I kept thinking maybe this is how it was supposed to be maybe I deserved this pain there were nights when I just wanted to end it all I thought about what it would be like to just disappear to stop the constant ache in my chest the shame the guilt what was the point of going on when I had ruined everything I had no one left to turn to no friends no family no one who cared
I was alone in the mess I had created I couldn't keep going like this I just couldn't now let's check from James's side 3 months had passed and I was finding my rhythm again the routine was simple work hard during the day train kickboxing in the evenings it was a hell of a way to forget the pain that had built up inside me over the months but then pain came from a different direction when Javier called alist I got some news for you he said his voice more serious than usual I braced myself Javier wasn't
one to call for small talk Susan's gone he said flatly the cops found her in the morning at her apartment overdosed some say it was on purpose my breath caught in my throat and for a moment I didn't know what to say a cold tear traced down my cheek before I could stop it it was strange part of me wanted to feel relief but there was this gnawing pit in my stomach a feeling that somehow I was still tied to her despite everything they cremated her no one was there to claim her body Javier continued
his tone softer now just stay strong brother stay strong I didn't respond I couldn't what was there to say I lay down on my bed afterward staring at the ceiling trying to process the news it all felt distant like watching someone else's life unfold a part of me wondered what if Susan had been open with me what if things had been different but there were no more wh ifs everything had ended James didn't exist anymore I was Alis now and I would live dear listeners please share your thoughts in the comments section below and don't
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