Why You Still Have Feelings for Them (The Truth No One Tells You) - Zen And Buddhist Teachings

there are moments when you find yourself haunted by a name a face a memory you try to move on yet their presence lingers like the last note of a song that refuses to fade you tell yourself that time will heal that one day you will wake up and feel nothing but that day never seems to come why is it that some people remain embedded in our hearts even when they are no longer in our lives why do feelings persist even when reason tells us they should not many will tell you that it is because of

Love attachment or unfinished business but Zen and Buddhist wisdom reveal a deeper truth one that is not often spoken of yet holds the key to your freedom Buddhism teaches attachment is the root of suffering but what if the attachment is to something that no longer exists then the suffering is not just deep it is endless to understand why you still have feelings for them you must see beyond the illusion of the Mind beyond the stories you tell yourself and into the true nature of attachment now let me take you into a story that will reveal

the hidden truth one that will change how you see love loss and lingering emotions Forever The Unfinished [Music] Melody a traveler once arrived at a temple seeking wisdom he had walked for days his heart heavy with sorrow when he met the old Master he bowed deeply and said master I cannot seem to let go there was someone I loved deeply yet they are gone from my life still my heart clings to them as if they are right beside me I know I must move on but my feelings do not listen to reason why does my

heart refuse to let them go the master smiled gently and asked do you play the flute The Traveler frowned no master I do not the master walked over to a shelf and picked up a flute he held it up to his lips but did not play a note instead he simply moved his fingers over the holes as if playing a silent Melody do you hear the song the Master asked the traveler shook his head no master there is no sound the master placed the flute down and said yet if I had played this same melody

in front of someone who once knew the song they would hear it in their mind even in the silence the Traveler's eyes widened but how is that possible the master replied because the song is not in the flute the song is in the mind of the one who remembers it the illusion of Holding On The Traveler sat in silence contemplating the Master's words finally he said are you saying that my feelings do not come from them but from within me the master nodded exactly you believe you still have feelings for them because they were the

source of your happiness but in truth your mind is simply playing a Melody that no longer exists outside of you the song You Hear now is not theirs it is yours the traveler frowned but Master if the song is mine then why can't I stop playing it the master took a deep breath and pointed to a pond outside look at the water if you throw a stone into it the ripples will spread if you throw many stones the water will continue to move long after the stones have sunk your feelings are the Ripples and your

past experiences with them were the stones you keep replaying memories throwing more stones and wondering why the water does not become still The Traveler side then how do I steal the water the master replied by no longer throwing stones why you still feel attached many people people believe that when we have feelings for someone it is because they are special Irreplaceable but Zen wisdom reveals something deeper you still have feelings for them not because of who they are but because of the meaning you assigned to them they became a symbol a symbol of love of

joy of something you believed you needed the Mind does not hold on to people it holds on to symbols think of a candle if someone gave you a candle during dur the darkest night of your life you would cherish it even long after the night has passed you may still carry that candle fearing another Darkness but here is the truth it is no longer night you are holding on not because of love but because of fear fear of losing the light they once provided but tell me if the sun has risen do you still need

to carry a candle the path to Freedom [Music] The Traveler looked down at his hands as if he had been holding something invisible all along Master if my feelings are an illusion of my own mind then does that mean I never truly loved them the master shook his head no my child love was real but love is like the wind it touches you changes you but it cannot be grasped what you are holding now is not love but a shadow of what once was that shadow is not real yet you are treating it as if

it is still alive The Traveler took a deep breath then what must I do the master placed his hand on the Traveler's shoulder and said you must realize that you are not chained to them you are chained to a memory and memories are nothing but thoughts a thought only has power if you believe it the wind will continue to blow my child but if you stop reaching for it you will see that you were never empty only unaware of the space already within you the unplayed [Music] song Days Later The Traveler stood on a hill

looking out at the vast Sky he took a deep breath closed his eyes and let the wind pass through him for the first first time he did not try to chase it for the first time he did not try to hold on and in that Stillness he realized something he was free not because the feelings had disappeared but because he had stopped believing that they were a prison you still have feelings for them because your mind continues to play an old song but what happens when you stop trying to hear it silence and in that

silence peace letting go is not losing it is returning to yourself the truth no one tells you is this you do not miss them you miss the version of yourself that existed when they were near and that version of you is not lost it is waiting to be found not in the past but in the present moment Zen teaches us that true peace does not come from Forgetting but from seeing clearly see clearly now you are not missing something outside of you you are simply longing for the harmony you once felt but that Harmony was

never them it was within you all along stop searching stop replaying the song Simply Be and in being you will find that you were never incomplete only unaware of the wholeness that was always [Music] there the illusion of longing when we say we cannot let go of someone we believe that it is because of love but Zen wisdom tells us otherwise what we call love is often a mix of attachment Nostalgia and identity true love does not create suffering only attachment does think of a river water flows carrying leaves branches and reflections of the sky

but what happens when you try to hold on to a piece of the river the moment you close your hands around it it slips through your fingers this is the nature of love it flows when you try to possess it it turns into Suffering The Mind clings to past relationships not because they were perfect but because they became part of your story when someone enters your life and brings Joy their presence becomes tied to your sense of Happiness when they leave it feels feels as if they have taken a piece of you with them but

that is an illusion no one can take away what is truly yours why the heart refuses to forget have you ever noticed how certain songs scents or places bring back emotions as if time has not passed this is because the mind stores experiences like unfinished Stories the Mind dislikes incompleteness so when something ends abruptly it keeps replaying it trying to find resolution but here's the truth some stories are not meant to be finished some songs are meant to be unplayed you do not have to seek closure from another person the only closure you need is

the realization that you were never truly abandoned because the love you experienced was never outside of you it was always Within [Music] what you can do to Free Yourself one see through the illusion of memory memory is selective the Mind highlights the moments of warmth love and connection while filtering out the pain the incompatibility and the struggles you may believe you miss them but what you truly miss is a version of them that never fully existed two understand that love is not lost it transforms when a fire burns out its warmth remains in the air

for a while that warmth does not mean the fire still exists it is only a lingering presence your feelings are the same they are not proof that they belong in your life they are simply remnants of what once was instead of trying to keep the fire alive honor it for what it was and let it rest three detach from the idea that they were your only source of Happiness the reason people struggle to move on is because they believe their happiness was tied to that person but happiness was never in them it was in the

moments you shared and those moments came from within you not from them this means you are fully capable of feeling that Joy again even without them four return to the present moment the past only exists when you bring it into the present each time you revisit memories you are reliving something that no longer exists but if you stay in the present moment if you focus on what is here and now you will see that life continues to give you new experiences new emotions and new connections five accept that some people are lessons not destinations not

everyone who comes into your life is meant to stay some people are like the moon on a journey beautiful distant and meant to be admired but never held they came into your life to teach you something to awaken something within you and then to continue on their own path you were never [Music] incomplete Zen teaches us that longing is a form of ignorance the ignorance of our own wholeness you are not missing someone you are missing the feeling of being loved of being seen of being connected but here is the truth you can create that

feeling within yourself the Same Heart that once loved them is still capable of love but you must direct it inward if you let go of the idea that they were your only source of love you will see that love is everywhere within you around you and waiting to be discovered in new forms embracing the freedom of Letting Go letting go is not forgetting letting go is not erasing the past Letting Go simply means accepting that the past does not have to control you anymore one day you will wake up and realize that you are no

longer waiting for them to return you will no longer feel that pull in your heart not because you forced yourself to forget but because you have returned to yourself and in that moment you will understand the greatest truth of all you were never meant to hold on to them you were meant to find yourself thanks for watching Hope in enjoyed this video don't forget to subscribe to my channel for more content like this just click the Subscribe button below and hit the notification Bell so you never miss an update also feel free to leave a

comment and let me know what you'd like to see next see you in the next video [Music]