there's nothing to tell it's just some guy i work with come on you're going out with the guy there's got to be something wrong with him so does he have a hump a humpband a hairpiece wait does he eat chalk just cause i don't want her to go through what i went through with carl um okay everybody relax this is not even a date it's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex sounds like a date to me [Music] all right so i'm back in high school i'm standing in the middle of
the cafeteria and i realize i am totally naked then i look down and i realize there is a phone there instead of that's right i never had that all of a sudden the phone starts to ring and it turns out it's my mother which is very very weird because she never calls me [Music] this guy says hello i want to kill myself are you okay sweetie i just feel like someone reached down my throat grabbed my small intestine pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck cookie carol moved your stuff out
today oh let me get you some coffee thanks oh no oh no no don't stop cleansing my aura don't just leave my aura alone okay i'll be fine all right really everyone i hope she'll be very happy no you don't no i don't to hell with her she left me and you never knew she was a lesbian no okay why does everyone keep fixating on that she didn't know how should i know sometimes i wish i was a lesbian did i say that out loud all right ross look you're feeling a lot of pain right
now you're angry you're hurting can i tell you what the answer is strip joints come on you're single have some hormones but i don't want to be single okay i just i just i just want to be married again and i just want a million dollars rachel oh god monica hi thank god i just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said that you might be here and you are you are can i get you some coffee decaf okay everybody this is rachel and another lincoln high
survivor this is everybody this is chandler and phoebe and joey and you remember my brother ross sure so you want to tell us now or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids oh god well it started about a half hour before the wedding i was in this room where we were keeping all the presents and i was looking at this gravy boat this really gorgeous lamos gravy boat when all of a sudden sweet and low i realized i realized that i was more turned on by this gravy both than by barry and i got really
freaked out and that's when it hit me how much berry looks like mr potato head you know i mean i always know he looked familiar but anyway i just had to get out of there and i started wondering why am i doing this and who am i doing this for so anyway i just didn't know where to go and i know that you and i have kind of drifted apart but you're the only person i knew who lived here in a city who wasn't invited to the wedding oh i was kind of hoping that wouldn't
be an issue [Music] you
