Laura it's Stacy can I yes Stacy um I have it wasn't even to Pivot I have just expanded and opened up so much since the retreat two weeks ago and on Friday I had the big epiphany of like I don't think I want to live here anymore and uh I'm I'm renting two rooms in this beautiful home with two other people who are great but it's also the discomfort of um feeling like that sense of being boxed in and ready to to take off and to bloom and do you have any um my intention also
is to leave here with love you know to leave love here to go to the next place so I don't have to the old pattern was to leave with discomfort or not on good terms but just to I'm only responsible for my part I can't you know be responsible for theirs but to put out to the universe you know the dream home what I'm looking for the next best place and just the the beingness but you have any suggestions besides putting out you know the the list the dream home to the universe of how that
would look yes yes first of all you t two two things one is that um uh open to a new living space and the second is that we have the tendency that in order to move on we need behind we create an excuse how to have the the the courage to say I am leaving I'm out of here you see that is the the behavior of ignorance well when we feel when we feel we need to to to recur to anger in order to to to take action because yes when we when one usually when
you are in apathy grief fear anger is a is a high you see but in this case you see you are you're experiencing the peace the fullness the completeness of what you are and it's this completeness that is inviting you to have your own place you see and and that is you see that is natural notice notice that that is natural maybe it took you by surprise actually to experience that you know or maybe it was there but somehow no no not yet you had a a a you have you were you been accommodating it
perhaps how to postpone it or perhaps not all that disappear collapse naturally so two things yes I will I will you don't need to but um if you like to to write that action and that option or that intention in a piece of paper which is I allow myself to have the perfectly perfect new place under the perfect circumstances you see in other words the perfect price the perfect place just perfect you see now the mind doesn't know Perfection but what you are is perfection so when when we are said allow it to be perfect
you're allowing Perfection to shine so for instance Stacy let's do it right here right now so you then you are in your own okay so the intention is uh you can sit in your own allowing yourself to have the perfect new living space right yes yes or what the perfect place or the perfect home or the perfect house whatever you want to so without so what do you feel is in the way for that to be so right now uh Finance very good so welcome that sense of finances right so check and see how that
finances arises in the shape of images and also in the shape of reactions um tightness in my chest for sure very good so notice that in now that that is arising I will invite you to notice the choice which is to stay narrow narrowing your attention into that or to Simply Liberate the attention into that which is allowing for Sensations and images and sounds to arise yet involved because the involvement is just like do I live by myself can I afford to live by myself can I rent a room again yes all of that is
the sounds yeah so yes notice that you're that which is aware is hearing it it's not is not denying it is not avoiding it but the the differ thing is that you're letting it be what they actually are only sounds and I will ask you can you welcome the sense of wanting to believe it almost like suffocating so just breathing back into the chest as well as the throat yeah welcome welcome yeah all those Sensations all these are the unconscious Sensations that we are that are designing our experiencing so welcome all those unconscious Sensations and
the moment you're making them conscious you see you're liberating them you're not any longer suppressing them so naturally unraveling dissipating in the unlimited openness that is here that's whatever it is Again Naturally aware yet un involved so the uninvolved like a surrendering kind of thing right or this the thing is that what what is uninvolved is allowing the surrendering to happen by itself what you're surrendering is what you used to think it was through it's crazy I feel like my lower belly my chest is opening but my head's like but wait wait wait a minute
wait a minute I need my bathing suit first before I jump into the into the pool of the unknown and so just like even laughing about it's like stuck energy but it's opening and then I'm feeling tingles like of excitement um of even like I my my favorite words are like magic and miracles like letting the magic and miracles um yes yes what what what is is that what we call magical is because when we let be what is what is is timeless is spaceless everything is possible you see that's what we call Magic so
yes so just allow yourself to be as you are that openness that is already timeless spaceless free that is the address of God you have unlimited freedom of thinking whatever it is that you like to think because that's that is what is natural but whatever you thinking voila yes it doesn't happen that way because we have uncons just thinking that says no well remember of this you have a debt to pay you haven't paid for that top you know all that kind of remember you're not so good first you need to be loved by your
daddy your mother I mean we have all these stories and make us drunk so yes Stacy at your own rhythm again allow yourself to to think what is that you want the perfect living space and notice that just by hearing that it triggers releasing naturally and what is and it's not a mystery what is releasing is the energy I used to maintain all the nose and like a relief of those old patterns or like you had mentioned in the beginning too of having to leave because of anger or quote unquote protection leaving on you know
bad terms and or heart you know heartaches or whatever so the beautiful what needing to do that you see welcome that said that was needed to do that because what happen is from the when we act from the point of view of ignorance we always need an excuse yeah oh yeah the excuse or the reason it could just be that the time has come and um in said I love you guys so much but you know somehow life is inviting me to we different different feels different ways that was my next question is how and
that's perfect that was just the loving everybody where they're at as well as myself yes who knows you might be the perfect example for [Music] them had a little bit of a guttural like it's like H but it's true you see so notice all of that that is arising you see all of those uh little Pebbles that we don't need to walk on them we're walking on this that creates this comfort you see walking on all these Pebbles and it's while because even as it's releasing and just um observing the past and even when I
moved out at 18 or whatever it's just all of that again it's just the train of thoughts and training or the patterns and beliefs are just like leaving just the relief yeah collapsing collaps simply because in this moment you're honoring more what you are o the moment we we honor what is real what is true that which is not true and is not real naturally collapses now I feel excitement yes so so welcome that as well because excitement is the highest energy of the sense of limitation oh exciting you see excitement is excit about the
future excitement about so many things so welcome that is still agitation you see wow so that doesn't mean that you're are denying yourself of that no but welcome that as well that is still a limitation and simply notice that which is a well of the excitement simply pring unchanging ever available yet and imposing andol and as I was witnessing that excitement it felt like it was almost like getting out of my body and then when you were talking about just the awareness it almost like I came back in my body to a degree but just
it was more I guess the expansion of it um or the awareness of it I don't know how to say that right yeah no you're right yes yes the awareness you see and you aware of all of that now all of that that you mentioned we not denying it but you seem to notice that you're naturally aware of it what I've noticed too even in this moment but at the retreat is like of me um always taking care of things people and animals and yes welcome that because that nothing changes what changes is Stacy is
the sense of Duty the sense I have to the sense I must the sense I sh the sense of obligation instead of doing it out of enthusiasm spontaneity love what the difference you see the same action is only that one is a free action and the other one is not free oh so liberating and just when you say things or I have those little aha moments at the retreat or even um listening to your meditations uh from last week this week it's almost like I can feel like in my my G gutter my belly my
second chakra just like things bubbling up for the relief where it's it makes me emotional cuz it's dissolving or so freeing where I know that there was like years I didn't cry and just the safety or the the freedom to be able to do that yes and not judge myself for it yes beautiful that's why we're here you see as a group is helping each other supporting each other we are this beautiful unlimited being and we're simply releasing liberating ourselves of these imagin limitations that has been designing our experiencing yeah and definitely letting go of
the Judgment off of myself around the emotions or the Judgment of what I would perceive that people would or my fear of people judging me for being emotional or I cry too much or whatever and just whatever but welcome welcome uh Stacey wanting to control how you're being perceived oh boy [Laughter] okay yeah welcome that wanting to control that wanting to make sure that they are you're being perceived in the right way you see notice how it is what is wanting safety yeah so welcome that sense of needing safety so it's almost like the as
it's releasing it's in my mind it's almost like if I feel safe controlling it so then I can be free of it but it's just the individualized yes exactly you saw it you are you are not that you used to believe you were those sounds those Sensations you see now now what you are is that which is aw of it perfectly aware perfectly unchanging m it's almost like a hot flash and there's like the movement of it and then just the releasing in my throat that was a long that was a big one that was
a [Laughter] doozy yes because when we're releasing as we're releasing we are releasing all the memories that we have created in the throat or in the in the chest usually that's right we are afraid to voice what we really think we have all those filters in the throat but the beauty about the throat somehow differently from the sensation at the chest area is that the sensations in the throat one they once they are released they're gone you don't feel that area any longer good I can even feel it releasing in my neck all the way
back there yes W yes you see the releasing is happening at the cellular level because because what is releasing is not the body mind called stasy releasing releasing is happening in the freedom of what you are whatever that is that is conscious and is conscious of the ability of awareness wow it's like the releasing it's the mind blown it just done wild oh my goodness thank you [Laughter] yes Stacy let's they used to say laugh all the way to [Laughter] Freedom yeah laugh instead of cry not judging just laughing laughing cry but laughing cry it's
okay you see it's it's is happening you see yes but you see what we're letting go about hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of thousands of thoughts hundreds and hundreds of thousands only that what you are unlimitedness as able to experience that and again is not the body is releasing the reason that you're feeling those Sensations leaving the body is because you see what you are is Liber is liberating all of that it's like I want to dance move my hips yeah the body couldn't release itself from that it couldn't other way they would have done
it already I'm ready that's the whole thing i' ready and is ready is I am ready is that a judgment or is that just awareness no yes you're ready that's it's being voiced I am ready but the beauty is I am ready okay what am I what am I that which is ready or that which is aware of it I am that I [Laughter] am oh [Laughter] goodness wow just had a hot flash like I'm just sweating over here like it's all that liberating of energy yes you see because that's the beauty of releasing is
immediate it's immediate that's right when you see you don't know how it is happened you only notice that things are different you're experiencing about things are different but it's so natural because what we are is natural what is in natural is what we call the discomfort and pleasingness effort effort that is the reason feels the way it feels because it's a natural thank you thank you supporting you all the way oh I appreciate whatever it is that you like that you like to enjoy thank you
