he's single she's single both think the other one is attractive and then they walk straight past each other and neither does anything about it hey Jason it was so lovely speaking to you that would have been fine but it wouldn't have been flirting flirting is nuanced flirting is like putting a little bit of bait on the tackle and throwing it out there on the line to see who grabs at it every day people walk past each other in the street he's single she's single both think the other one is attractive and then they walk straight
past each other and neither does anything about it I had a woman recently at my event in Chicago she told me that she keeps meeting guys online and that they don't turn into dates and she ends up incessantly in a texting conversation with them and I said well why don't you get out there in the real world why don't you meet people there and she seized up a little because for most people the idea of actually meeting people in real life is scary but it doesn't have to be so scary if we don't take ourselves
as seriously if we stop censoring ourselves and if we actually get a little more free and easy with the interactions we have so to get out of this paralysis of playing it safe and not flirting with people I'm going to give you three simple things you can do to flirt more with the guys you like number one look more I know what women do they go out they look at a guy once then they look back at their friends and they say okay he knows ladies I'll let you in on a little secret we don't
know so as a general rule I want you to look four times more than you think you need to strategy number two mouth the word whether you're walking past someone or you're standing next to them in a line and you catch their eye for the first time you doing more than making eye contact and actually mouthing the word high it doesn't even have to be audible in fact it might even be more cute if it's not audible but that moment shows that your sweet and warm and kind and inviting and like the first example just
gives a guy that extra license to start talking to you number three when you have a date with someone Express that you're looking forward to seeing them be honest about that so on the day of the day if it's a first date text him and say I'm looking forward to meeting you tonight or if it's your second or third day and you have a bit more of a bond or a connection by now text him and say not gonna lie I'm excited to see you tonight those moments of not only flirtation but warmth and sweetness
are something that elevate your character flirting is interest plus challenge I'm going to give you three specific real world examples to prove this now let's say in the first one you go out tonight you see a guy across the bar that you think is attractive now if you were just demonstrating interest you might look at him so stare endlessly have three more drinks then stumble over to him half drunk and by the time you get there say you're really hot [Music] now if she was showing interest and challenge she could start by simply looking at
him until he sees her then when they catch eyes she could look away as if she's just been caught out then she could look again and start building that tension a little bit now you may say what is she actually doing in that moment to be challenging but the challenge is in Bill all she needs to do is show a little interest because he has the challenge of having to walk over there and do something think about it for a guy at that point he's got to have the courage to think of something to say
and then walk across the room and open his mouth to this woman example number two let's fast forward this night he's now asked for her number and they have parted ways an hour later he texts her saying hey it's Jason she says who he's like Jason from the bar she says hmm I don't recall unless you're that handsome guy with the nice shoes winky tongue face love that winky tongue face now look it would have been fine if he said hey it's Jason and she said hey Jason it was so lovely speaking to you that
would have been fine but it wouldn't have been flirting flirting is that moment when she pretends not to know him and then all of a sudden just as he's off balance she swoops in with a compliment about him being handsome and having nice shoes I was once told attraction is about keeping someone just a little off balance and so we come to real world example number three let's Flash Forward a couple of weeks in their relationship they've been seeing each other they're having a good time she's at work one day and she comes out of
a meeting and texts him I just finished a meeting and I definitely wasn't thinking about you most of the time okay bye now again if all she'd texted him was thinking of you that would have been fine it would have been a perfectly reasonable thing to say and it would have worked but if we want to turn this from a compliment into a flirtation now we use this message because that moment where she says I definitely wasn't thinking about you most of the time it's a clear way of saying I'm reluctant to admit to you
that I was thinking about you the whole time I'm being playful about that right now I'm giving you a compliment but I'm not at the same time and then when I say okay bye it's like I'm out of here you've had enough I've said too much already I'm out when she does this she's taking a regular compliment and adding flavor to it and it's that flavor that often makes someone excited and energized it keeps them wanting more are you sick and tired of situations that never go anywhere texts that never become dates dates that never
become relationships it all just feels exhausting I have a program called the momentum text that shows you practically how you can take any situation in early dating and progress it so that it actually leads to a relationship go check it out at momentumtexts.com it's also seven dollars so it's a really easy decision to make and it is the most practical program you will find for early dating I'll see you over there and let's get back to the video the idea of showing that we like someone is like death to so many people it's like swimming
with sharks I'm just gonna jump into the water and get eaten but here's the problem with that it shows a misunderstanding of what flirting actually is because flirting isn't just running up to somebody and saying hey I like you we should be together that's not what flirting is flirting is much more subtle than that flirting is nuanced flirting is like putting a little bit of bait on the tackle and throwing it out there on the line to see who grabs at it let me give you an example of this let's say that you like a
guy at work I'm not endorsing you going into work right now and ruining your work Life by the way by making it awkward but let's just run through this example throwing yourself head first is doing this you walk into the office one day and you see him over there Dan his name is you see him by the coffee machine he's making himself a lovely little espresso you look over it down and you think this is my moment and all of my friends have told me honesty is the best policy I just need to show him
that I like him and let him know so you walk over there to Dan and you say Dan um I've been developing feelings for you over the last few weeks and well I guess I like you a lot and I think we should go out sometime Dan looks at you and It's Tricky for ten right now because he either has to say yes to the date to be polite or he has to be like uh no I'm good I'm gonna uh go do some accounting now at my desk now let's look at the second example
where you just throw out a little bit of bait Dan's over at the espresso machine you walk over there and maybe you even start with something flirtatious where you say why are you always hogging the coffee machine when I come to make myself a coffee and Dan says something flirtatious back because he's a bit of a smoothie and he's like well maybe one following me to the coffee machine had you ever considered that and you're like I'm not following you just get out of the way so I can make my coffee lovely little flirtation right
now by the way this isn't even my main line but that's a nice little bit of flirtation right off the bat and you created it when you went over there and said you're hog in the coffee machine then as you're walking away you say you know what it's a good thing me and you are colleagues because we would be so much trouble for each other and then you leave now this is a beautiful little flirtatious Line This is the bait in the water because firstly you're disqualifying Dan you're saying listen you and I can't be
together because you know we're colleagues and and that's the problem so we can't have any funny business but you're also saying but if we did we'd be trouble Dan in his male brain all he hears is trouble you say because men love trouble when you throw out this bait it's really low effort low risk for you because you can sit back and drink a beer on the side of the riverbank and just throw out your line and just wait that's what flirting is that's why when people get so scared to flirt they're forgetting that although
flirting is a vulnerable Act it's not jumping in with the sharks because you can throw out just a little bit of bait and see if someone buys if they don't buy it that's fine you throw out another bit of bait either for that person or for somebody else okay let's just get down to business five ways to make him want to kiss you number one touch him no I don't mean is groinal region I just mean touch him somewhere even innocently on the arm that actually looks good what that guy has over there because on
a date when two people haven't even touched made physical contact for the entire date and then all of a sudden one of them has got to think about leaning in and kissing the other one that feels like going from zero to 60 miles an hour but if you've been introducing light and carefree touch throughout the day kissing is a much more natural progression number two take a sip when you take a sip of your drink it engages your lips so it draws attention to them but at the same time if you look away it has
the added benefit of giving him a moment to look at you and take you in without you staring right back at him that is too funny monkey that is something that we actually don't get to do that frequently on a date and when someone is looking at us that's when they get a chance to really get attracted number three glance at his lips now the more slowly you do this the more seductive it's going to be but if you take a moment to look into his eyes and then look down at his lips and then
back up at his eyes that moment becomes a very seductive moment even if it's unconscious even if he doesn't know that you're actually looking at his lips he registers that you're taking him in in a different way so like what part of the Jungle were you in when that happened number four when he looks at you in a certain sexy way maybe he smiles with it I want you to say to him you can't look at me like that the words you can't followed by looking away creates this real tension in the moment you're telling
him something he can't do or he's very sexy when done playfully and in that moment when you look away there's that vulnerability to it too it's like he's doing something to you that he shouldn't be monkey can't look at me like that number five do the cue Act choose a moment when he's teasing you to give him a serious face when he thinks you should be laughing and say don't be mean to me and for those of you thinking that this plays into some sort of weird gender stereotype the cue Act is available to anyone
I do it all the time don't be mean to me and when someone's being cute and adorable you just want to grab him and kiss him that's the effect we're going for Pace is a very important thing on a date I'm not just talking about eye contact here I'm talking about how slowly you speak at certain times how slowly you move at certain times when you think of someone confident and sexy there's a pace to that that slows down when I go beyond confident and I say seductive it starts to get even more slow doesn't
it well you can mimic that on a date in certain moments the way you look at someone when you take a sip of your drink or when they take a sip of theirs when someone is telling you a story passionately and you have that little you ever have that moment where someone gets really passionate about something and you see that their eyes light up you see that glint in them and all of a sudden you get that little hit of oh this person's attractive in that moment slow down look at them a little more slowly
you can even look from their eyes to their mouth and back to their eyes these things start to create that element of Seduction if you're constantly making points and moving around a lot and gesturing a lot and in that kind of jittery mode and everything you say is really fast sentences and so on there's no seduction to that pace slow it down did you slow it down test number three did you give him a desire based compliment there's platonic language and there's desire language there's also a platonic tone and a desire to alone you can
use either a platonic language would be that looks nice desire language would be that looks hot platonic tone would be you look good in that jacket desire tone would be you look good in that jacket subtle differences but one of them says we're going to be friends and the other one says we're not going to be friends number four did you hug them like you liked them there's a big difference in hugging someone as if they're a friend and the way we hug someone when we feel comfortable with them and we like them we let
it linger for just a half second longer we almost become a bit more vulnerable you ever hugged someone where it felt like just for a brief moment they were sort of melting into you didn't it feel amazing didn't it make you feel connected to that person didn't it make you feel more comfortable with that person didn't it creates the moment of electricity are you creating that with other people or are you leaning over giving them your shoulder and the rest of your body Retreats and it feels like they're hugging a coat hanger allow that hug
to be a little more vulnerable and to last just a little longer than you would if you were trying to get away number five did you give them a couple of opportunities to just observe you know that moment moment where someone leaves the date or leaves the table and goes to the bathroom and it's the one moment you've had to just watch them you catch a different angle than you've had so far you can look at them without worrying that they're looking back at you looking at them and you can just take them in this
is a moment where you get to Showcase yourself walking a little sexy having a little strut having a nice little moment with your hair looking at the menu you're up deep in the menu so they can look at you or going to the restroom or just being over here checking something out which allows them to check you out people need moments where they can take you in without feeling like you're watching them number six did you tease them in a playful manner playfully teasing someone could be that you think your order was better than his
and then you look at that person and you go I won I have the best order or it might be that they say that your food doesn't look as good as theirs and you can go rude got like a little flirtatious vibe to it tension is often born out of a playful friction right playful friction allows you both to step into a role play where you're having a little a little thing your odds over something and that creates a spark it could be that there's a pool table over there and you go we can't play
Paul I can't have us fighting on our first date that creates this little like mini this mini competition like oh it's not it's not so friendly anymore there's a free song to it number seven did you make use of the post date sexy subtle subtext text if you just send someone a message that says I had a really nice time tonight I hope you didn't have to wait too long for your Uber there's a nice text but it's so literal there's no subtext whatsoever but what if you just said this tonight was really fun dot
dot dot and then maybe you throw in a little blushing Emoji firstly it's not many words I kind of like it for that reason I'm not saying you have to send few words but something about this message really works because it's few words it's not overly thought out the Ellipsis is what says there's things I'm not saying right now and the word fun that's desire language that says we could have more fun together the Emoji is both a signal of warmth at the end of this message but there's also a little suggestiveness to that too
right there's the ability to blush it's the ability to be made to feel something there's a vulnerability about that it's like you're thinking about how fun the night was and maybe you're even thinking about other things and you're blushing as a result this is a message that immediately when someone receives it after a date they say oh there's something there this person is attracted to me this person didn't just have a nice time and the great irony is that when we feel someone is slightly attracted to us even if it's just in what they don't
say not even what they do say we're more likely to be attracted to them because we take our mind out of the friend zone and into the desire zone now I know what you're thinking fine I'll do those seven things then what will I have the answer for you I have a program it's called the momentum texts in this program are 67 specific text messages that you can use to take it from a very early stage all the way to some serious investment so that your dating life doesn't keeps drifting into a state of limbo
it actually goes somewhere with someone I don't think we've ever released a more nuts and bolts practical program of things that you can literally just grab and send it's really good it took us ages to make it'll take you seconds to use whatever you how much were we offering this for before Jameson seven dollars seven we adjusted the price didn't we no seven dollars what about inflation surely it should be about a thousand dollars by now have you seen gas we're sticking to seven you can't even get a pumpkin spice latte for that I couldn't
even get a pumpkin spice latte for that that's mental check it out I'll see you over there momentum texts.com
