So hey guys are you frustrated with where you're at right now maybe stunted in your progress well if you are I want to recommend a place for you to go called growth day growth day.com Ed it is the number one personal development app on the planet it's got all kinds of high performance techniques in there courses accountability journaling live speeches from some of the top influencers in the world Including me it's an overall environment to change your life growth.com sled where are we economically I think this dictates where we are in our lives and our
money last time you on you said look I think we're in for a winter I think it's going to be a long one I'm curious as as you evaluated at the time of this recording because clearly things aren't great we you've got couple Wars going on there's disarray all over the planet but then on the other hand you Know in the United States inflation seems to be getting somewhat under control unemployment's not real high you know I I go to a mall it's packed still with people in there buying stuff and consuming So based on
all of those conditions you see what's the State of the Union right now in your mind well you know if you study history and I think you and I've talked about this before everything moves in cycles and they're they're pretty predictable Cycles uh so you know I always tell people that if you want to be good at anything investing you want to own a business you want to have uh a great body you want to dance you want to sing anything you want to do you need three skills the first skill is you got to
have pattern recognition if you see anybody that's good at anything they recognize patterns and it makes and not fearful and then the second thing is pattern utilization it's nice to see a Pattern but if you can use it to your advantage you become a great investor you become a great business person right because you know the patterns and you're not fearful because you know these patterns happen over and over again and then eventually it's kind of like if you play other people's music long enough you're able to create your own patterns right you build on
what you've learned so I want my kids to learn those three skills because as AI is coming there's So many beautiful Technologies I know there's a lot of fear about them CU they time something new comes especially with the capacity of AI there's going to be a lot of fear that goes out there but you have to decide you going to live in fear I was talking to some the other day and they're like we're on the verge of you know a nuclear war World War III and I said okay well you're going to sit
here and worry about whether a nuclear bomb is going to be dropped on you let me Just tell you if it happens you won't even know it you'll be vaporized it'll be over you don't need to you know a courageous man dies onetime or woman right a coward dies a thousand times because every time you imagine it's there so we're living in a season that is predictable if you study history it goes in about 20e cycles and think of it this way there's a springtime where everybody's optimistic if you run a business in there you
look like a genius You're just in the right place at the right time we then are have a correction time or challenging time a summer that tests you it's hot and difficult and if you don't take care of what you've grown it falls apart if you make it through those two seasons you get to fall where it's a reaping time it's beautiful it's easy somebody wants to loan you money for a house and you don't even have an income you know you know those types of days right easy money right interest Rates are nothing you
can do it all and then we always have that followed by winter right and winter it looks like it's going to be bad forever and people overreact so if you look at those Four Seasons you start looking around and you can see that if you look back and you look at Humanity back you know when we were hunter gatherers we had a lot of fear because we hadn't recognized one pattern pattern of the seasons once you know Seasons you know you don't plant in The winter it doesn't matter how hard you work you do the
right thing at the wrong time it's not going to work you got to plant in the spring and you got to take care of in the summer and so forth once we learn that we could stay in a community we could build there's patterns in terms of think of four seasons of a person's life 0 to 21 roughly is kind of Springtime some of us had to go to work at 13 or 14 years old but most people are pretty protected for The most part in their youth people tell you what to believe they teach
you how it's supposed to be but then you enter 22 to roughly 42 and you're the soldier of society you're that person that goes to war literally you're the person who goes into business and now what happens is you decide to test what you believe and you think you're unbeatable you're going to be president the United States you're going to be a billionaire you're going to have 100 perfect relationships Simultaneously and everyone's going to be happy and then in your 30s you discover holy a relationship's not that easy I'm not a billionaire yet and so
you get humbled and you you start to grow but you also test 43 to 63 is the power season that's the reaping time if you planted in the spring otherwise it's a weeping time if you didn't right if you worked hard in those first two seasons you know you and I both can do more with our pinky now than we work 24 Hours a day and if you work 24 hours a day now you can move mountains right because you know the right people you know the right principles you know the distinctions you can through
to it I have 111 companies now doing s billion dollar in business that's a real under statements the conservative number estimate it's actually much higher than that now but to give you a perspective I mean I couldn't run three companies at one stage right you know was it was Overwhelming to me so your skills get stronger and then think of 64 to 84 to 104 120 is the oldest humans that's the winter time where you now are more of a mentor in society you know who the hell you are you're not trying to convince yourself
or anybody else who you are if they don't get it you don't really care you just want to give back and do beautiful things because you've lived life long enough and then you look at how are things different in the' 60s and 70s compared to the 50s very different values the 80s 90s 2000s very different values and so people grow up in different environments but if you live long enough we're all going to be tested we're all going to go through all the seasons so it's a long way of saying where are we right now
if you study history we're in Winter because the Primary Emotion is fear and things get magnified in this environment social media now is a tool that does that the Regular media does and they're good people they're not they're not trying to do anything but meet their job their job is to make more money for the shareholders and the way I do that is get your attention that's why I have clickbait because it doesn't matter whether the story is good or not if you click on it I'm paid and we all know fear sells so that's
why we live in the world we're in we're in this for a period of time not all Winters are the Same everywhere on Earth and right now America is still positioned pretty well we have a lot of challenges that have be faced there's a lot of change that has to happen for us but I'm optimistic and I also know that these people that people look down on who think you know they haven't had it hard there's some truth in that you know you grow up differently when everything's at your fingertips on your phone but what's
really nice is the challenges will make Them strong cuz here's the history of the world in four sentences Good Times create weak people you can see it in Thousand Years of Roman history over and over again you can see in Greek history you can see it anywhere so good times create weak people weak people create bad times bad times create strong people strong people great great times and then happens again and you can see this history after history so I'm optimistic about the Future because we have so much technology that can change things here in
the United States we are leaders in that AI is one of those pieces but there's also technology changing our bodies we talked about this last time because I wrote the book life force and interviewed 150 of the best regenerative scientists in the world I mean we're 12 years from what they call Longevity you know um the term they use what is the term they use it's Longevity um escape velocity what that means is yes what it means is in 12 years years you know if you talk to the very smartest people in the world you
know that are the best in the world of what they do like Ray kwell he's been the most accurate predictor of Technology far none in history or you talk to George Church from Harvard who's the Genesis Genesis they both say about 12 years rough leaves what they both estimate every year our technology will Allow us to be a year younger physiologically as long as we don't get killed in a car accident or something like that so if you take care of yourself of the next 12 years roughly maybe it's 15 you're going to be exposed
to technology change everything crisper is eliminating some diseases the first one approved is dealing with CLE cells just done last month and they can literally cut it out of your genetic code and so that you don't get it but Neither your kids I mean this is wild so it's not that simple there's moral decisions to be made there's going to be consequences to any new technology there's going to be disruption but overall we have an incredibly bright future not because I'm optimistic because I'm not I'm a realist I just look at the history I see
how things work when we make it through winter it'll be a new Springtime it won't be forever will that be another four years 5 years seven years I don't know but we will get to the other side and then it'll be optimism again for another 17 18 20 years these history patterns are there so the real secret is there's two worlds you got to master your own internal world and the external world you can't control the external world you can influence it but if you take control of your mind your body your emotions and your
actions you're can to have an extraordinary quality of life in winter People freeze the death during winter some people sneeze ski snowboard they build a fire they build their business so it's up to you instead of complaining about the season or pretending it's not winter you want to take advantage of it I grew up my started my business in 19777 that's old I am and we had 18% interest rates so when people complain about 8% you know I just think of like if they were 18% right people be sacking the White House you know this
is insane But that's the world we're in so living in a challenging time but an exciting time and most of the problems we're facing whether it's crime in the streets a lot of that's driven by policy whether it's the wars we're talking about whether it's fighting internally within people the common disease that everybody has is selfishness and when you don't face enough challenges you focus on yourself a lot and it never makes you happy The Cure is love I know that Sounds corny but love is when you care about something more than yourself whether it
be your children or your community or your country or you know the people that you want to serve feeding people whatever your thing is those are the things that give us energy and allow us to succeed so we need to just stop complaining and put ourselves in a place where we make oursel more resourceful and more resilient and get stronger you know instead of praying Lord help me it's like make me stronger so that I can turn these things around and that's that's my approach to things I love that I it's turned in for a
lot of people Tony though world events the economy what's it becomes their primary obsession it just does I mean more than ever because what you said the media social media and there you know one thing I tell people recently is like there's some you're kind of hiding in that Obsession to some extent I mean if you can be so obsessed what's going on in the world and the conditions of the world you don't have to pay very much attention to what's going on in your world in your family in your finances it's one of the
things one of the reasons I wanted Tony's event to be promoted is because those will be three days where you can focus on your world your inner world so you can change your external results and so again join tony1 100.com go register for that event guys it's a big deal I want to ask you that like a harder question and that is how does someone condition change so you used the word patterns earlier right yeah and in both of our work with different people they've got where they've got because they've developed these patterns and maybe
they do read a book or they come to a one-day event or something like that and there's change but how do you condition change in Somebody is that what you would call immersion over a 3-day window or is it some habitual change when they get back that's task or routine oriented conditioning change is kind of the rub I think it's like the next level of of advice that's given to somebody that you know I don't see being discussed very often I think it's a hard question so I'm curious as to what your answer is about
conditioning a change let me give you two quick answers to it one is how I Did originally because I didn't know how right I started reading all these books the first book I read when I was you know just you know 17 years old my mom kicked my dad Out She chased me out with a knife I knew she wouldn't kill me but I wasn't going back in that house and I was like okay I'm walking in the rain trying to figure out what to do I stayed in the laundry room of on the second
night first night on the hill and it rained so the next night in laundry room Of a friends and I had small amount of money like I know 19 20 bucks and I took the bus and I went to this bookstore I'd seen years before and I got this book called The Magic of Believing by Claude and Bristol and in the book it talked about conditioning your mind and that it talked about not affirmations I'm happy I'm happy I'm happy and your brain goes BS you're not happy but incantations is when you speak it you
engage your body with such intensity now today I Understand when you want to change something you change the body you change your focus and you change your language when you change all three of those things radically somebody's depressed uses their body a certain way they talk with a certain tone of voice they focus on what they can't control they focus on things in the past they can't shift they focus on what's missing it's not hard to figure out what's going to happen they use words like I tried I can't I don't Know there's what I
call a Triad these three things are done a certain way when you're depressed if you change that person's body radically the tempo they speak their voice you change their focus to what they are in control of you've changed their language everything shifts well when you do incantations think of like affirmations only speaking it aloud with total intensity over and over again with repetition it's like conditioning your mind your body and your emotions Once so I was working in these two Banks mom kicked me out and they were in San Marino California near Pasadena California and
I worked there I was still in high school and I would take the buses there because I didn't have a car my mom kept my car it was a 1960 Volkswagen Bug and I got there and I cleaned the banks because it wasn't by the hour it was by the result so I cleaned two Banks I was really good at it I did a really good job and by finish By 2: in the morning I get on the bus by 3:30 in the morning I'm home I go to sleep wake up on hour sleep and
go to school it was pretty brutal one night I come out of the bank changed my entire life I'm waiting for the bus waiting for the bus waiting for the bus 45 minutes no bus there's nobody around it's 3 in the morning I got to get home what the hell am I gonna do I know I can call and do this I'm Million Miles Away so all of a sudden a guy comes creeping down the Street and he rolls down his window goes hey buddy I'm at the bus stop he goes didn't you see the
paper there's a bus strike there's no way to get home so what did I do part of it was initially anger with my mother kicking me out and I'll show her but then I remember I read this book so I was doing these every day and every way I'm getting stronger and stronger every day every way I'm getting strong every day and every way I'm getting Stronger and strong every day and every way I'm getting stronger and stronger I did that for the first 20 minutes then happier and happier healthier I ran 13 and a
half miles I never run two miles in my entire life it became the power that I still tap into this day I literally found a part of myself by demand by conditioning by the end of that like I was utterly certain what I can do you know when you see an athlete a kicker you know on a football team a Basketball player about to do a free throw and you think they're going to miss it you can tell before they release the ball or kick the ball they're you see they're lacking certainty when you look
at somebody like Steph and he releases that ball and he turns and doesn't even look and it's already a swish people go oh my God he's a genius no he's being rewarded in public for what he's practiced a million times in private Steph told me he shoots I've Seen him 500 shots every single day of his entire adult life from the time he was a teenager but just take his 15-year career 500 shots a day it's 14,000 shots a month 168,000 shots a year 15year career 2.52 million shots he's taken to make 3,300 and be
the greatest three-point shooter in history that's conditioning right you do it you do it you do it you do it but there is a way to speed it up when Stanford came to me and wanted to Do that study on depression a couple years ago during covid they wanted to see they saw the results they couldn't believe it right people that get depressed they had two professors that had gone no more clinical depression whatsoever so they want to do the study the most people 40 60% of the people that get treated for drugs or treat
or psychological treatment are still depressed that's the meta studies 40% improve average Improvement 50% they're Half as depressed they did it with us 100% of the people after five days days from date with Destiny not a single person a year later 11 months later nobody done it 177% of the people had suicidal ideation none was suicide ideation how did that work well we changed their perceptual filters what people focused on what the things meant to them what they do but we did it for five or six days and nights of total immersion and since they
followed me for Three years biochemically they were interested because they discovered this biochemistry that Tom Brady experiences that the Tampa Bay um uh hockey team that's won so many Stanley Cups you know lightning has have done they go into a state if Tom Brady's down in the fourth quarter by 10 points and he he's got two minutes there's no way you're gonna win the game something happens to him biochemically that happens to me every Time I'm on stage because they measur me for three years they call it the championship biochemistry my testosterone surges to a
level that's insane but so does my audience they follow me so at that level anything you think about you remember that's why the retention is so high you remember where you were in 911 you don't remember where you were in 811 you don't remember those moments because there's not enough emotion there's so much emotion secondly Normally there would be a huge amount of cortisol that's the stress hormone that gets in the way of your performance for Tom for Tampa for me my cortisol drops through the floor while my testosterone is rising that puts you in
this state of absolute push certainty and drive doesn't guarantee you're going to win but it inre increases your chances about about 100 fold my audience not only my live audience my live audience when we went during covid to digital where I had People in 195 countries participating like we're going to do for example for the three days yeah they went around send people to 15 different countries took their blood just like me took their saliva measured them every single one of them went through this exact same pattern and that's why 11 months later 72% decrease
and I've never seen them again 72% decrease in negative emotions 2% increase in positive emotions in business it's all engagement they Measure engaged disengaged actively disengaged engage you really into it disengaged is like quiet quitting you do the minimum actively disengage of people that are angry and actually trying to screw you over in your own business CO's four years destroyed engagement more than any time in the history of the measurements and at levels no one could even dream of the one that grew the most was active disengagement people actually angry trying to mess up the
comp We did in six days they're doing a one-year study most studies like this are a month to three months largest one they've ever done 750 people at the the end of the six days update with Destiny five and a half days every single person was higher than they were before covid meaning their engagement was through the roof but was really cool is they're measuring it the year ends this month but I saw the six Monon review every month they increased their engagement And their effectiveness and I never spoke to them again never saw them
again why cuz it's in their biochemistry why because they have whole new filters in their brain so you can do it through incantations or you can do it through some form of immersion they took the best professor at Stanford to won all these Awards had them teach my exact content as a contrast group word for word but without the things I do to change biochemistry and he still got 300% increases in retention that he's never seen before on the content but mine was 3,000% right and his wore off after was eight weeks and mine a
year later was still producing the results so there is a science to changing your conditioning so you can do it rote by incantation do it rot by having new rituals there's so many ways you can do it but the most powerful way I know of is total immersion where we engage your Biochemistry and your emotion and what's so cool about it is time disappears you know when you ask people what's a long time some people say a century some people say two minutes right a long time is anytime you're not enjoying yourself you know a
minute can feel like eternity if it's a horrible experience but if you're having a great time time disappears and you know even the events we go 12 hours a day literally around the world when I'm doing my events here Like the last event I just to he a date with Destiny we had people in 195 countries so it's every country in the world we had like we'd start here at 10:00 a.m. it's already midnight in Australia they go from Midnight to about 1 in the afternoon for six straight days in a row and we lost
1% of the people give you an idea it's that engaging right they're in a whole different time zone it doesn't matter they're in the zone and our biochemistry is changed and So that's why I love books but the reason I still do seminars is because there's nothing like an immersion experience like that now people can do it from anywhere on Earth or they can come in person and do it too because now that CO's over we do both yeah and that's by way this event at join tony1 100.com I want you to go it's just
that's because you have immersion over 3 days here's what I just want you all to do so I'll give you my simple language From that success Bliss achievement ecstasy is a biochemistry yes it's a neurochemistry and a biochemistry and so if you want to find those states of being it's a biochemistry and so just for a lot of you something really simple to do when you're training physically if you work out you run you walk These are times where you should be anchoring your goals and your visions of your life when you're in that elevated
state of neuro and biochemistry it's just a much more Powerful anchoring and conditioning for you to create a change in your life and so elevated emotional or physical States and anchoring the things that you want in your life your visions and your goals and your Ambitions now you're anchoring the biochemistry and the neurochemistry the likelihood of those things happening and repeating themselves becomes that much higher this is important stuff for you guys I want to navigate it's interesting conversation because we're To navigate you know our inner World in our lives and money in this conversation
today as you described Peter Dam Manis your dear friend was not on very long ago just a few weeks ago Peter was on we were talking about exactly what you're talking about life extend tion and if you can stick around another 20 or 30 years you may get an additional 20 30 40 years on the back end of your life which is great but the other thing I think about is means you need more money if You're going to live longer you got to have more money if you're going to be living to eight if
people pass away now in they're mid-70s and that the potential that many of you that are listening to this in your 30s and 40s or 50s will live past a 100 and maybe significantly past 100 this financial question becomes even more Paramount in people's lives because you're going to need more of it to live and so I want to start out with some basic things that You teach and then we're going to get some pretty complicated not complicated but sophisticated interesting stuff everybody so first things first is you kind of have these four what I'd
call basic principles regarding money yeah that I think most people aren't familiar with I mean the conversation you're not taught it in school you're not taught it in college it's not taught in most families but I love these principles everything from the diversification to Asset allocation why don't you just start with that Tony just illustrate kind of the the framework of having a financial education or some Financial sense well uh first I'd say the biggest challenge for most Americans is they are not owners right most Americans are consumers we have all this advertising to consume
consume so you're gonna own an iPhone you know maybe you want to own Apple you know because that iPhone is going down in value and you're going to Get a new one why not have own the company I'm not saying you got Buy Apple I'm just giving as an example become an owner become an owner you got do something very basic everybody spends all the money they have and you have to make one discipline and make the decision that says I'm going to create a freedom fund whatever age I am I'm not going to wait
till it's too late and I'm going to take 10 or 15% or whatever percentage of my income and never see it I'm G to have arrange it to automatically go into an account and then I'll figure out how to invest it but I got to not see it because as long as you don't do that you're not going to get where you want to go there's a guy that I talk about in one of my early books who worked for UPS um Theodore Johnson's his name he never made more than $144,000 a year and retired
with $70 million how is that humanly possible CU one of his friends said we're g to Make you wealthy in your long term he goes I'll never be wealthy I make 14 Grand a year he goes you're gonna be wealthy we're going to take 20% of what you earn put it aside and invest it which by the way he put it in UPS primarily he was a driver but later became you know a low-level executive and people loved him he loved delivering and people love the state he put him in they look forward to seeing
him but 20% he goes can't do that I can't live on What I have and the guy said if the government passed a law and said you had to pay 20% more taxes you'd scream you'd yell and you'd pay it so you got to set a number in and automate it and then where do you put interjection on that just inter interjection real quick I want you to keep going this is a really important Point guys you guys know that I built a financial company for 30 years yes and here's the here's the false belief
system and I'm gonna let Tony rip Through this because it's awesome people think once I get around to making a lot of money then I'll start saving this 10 or 20% here's what my experience is if you can't begin to save money even when you're at a lower income level you will not do it ultimately when you make more money you'll upgrade from the Honda to the Lexus you'll upgrade from the apartment to the condo and then when you make a little bit more you go from the condo to the single family residence the Lexus
to the Mercedes and you never get around to having that money you never see end up in savings and Investments so it's critical you begin to find a way to do that at any level of income somehow someway go for it back spot on and if you do it in the early days I mean if you're a kid and you put you know you put aside $300 a month because you got low overhead out of your money you can start that at 17 and because of compounding you could Stop that literally at you know if
you start at 17 you could stop at 27 and you put very little money in and it'll grow to almost $2 million if it just put in the stock market an 8% compounded return if you wait till you're 27 to start you're going to have to invest till you're 65 and you'll still have less money so the sooner you start the better also your point also relat to philanthropy people go you know oh yeah I'll give money when I'm rich one thing I figured out early on if you won't give a dime out of a
dollar you're not going to give 10 million out of 100 million or a billion out of 10 billion and so when you do that by the way you teach your brain there's more than enough so that's the philosophical part when I did I've done three books two of them this third one's just now coming out but both the other two are number one New York Times bestsellers so the first one was money Master the game then unshakable and when I was doing those books I went interviewed none of it was my opinion I said' let
me interview the smartest people in the world financially the ray do the Carl icons the Warren buffets the Paul tutor Joneses and I knew a lot in this area I've coached Paul tutor Jones one of the top 10 traders in history for 25 years now I think it is 24 years something like that and so I've seen every day what he does all those times coached him I knew a lot but when I Interview these people they're all different and I was looking for what do they do in common that makes them wealthy I it
all self-made billionaires nobody from the lucky sperm Club there were four core things they all agreed on even if they did completely different types of investing the first core principle is different it's so simple different than most investors the best investors are focused on not losing money if you ask Warren Buffett he has This famous two rules step one he said rule number one to investing don't lose money rule number two see rule number one right now that's easy easy to say but most people are like what kind of return I'm going to get the
way they don't lose money is the second key when I interviewed all of them they all agree on one thing there's only a few things you can manipulate to make more money you can make better choices like which stocks or bonds or real estate or Whatever to invest in uh you can have better timing and then there's asset allocation and when I interviewed David Swinson from Yale he took them from1 billion doll in their entire Century of development he grew their annuity to 31 billion during his time there it's unbelievable what he did he said
Tony you're going to be wrong know how smart you are about picking the right stock or Bond you're going to be wrong wrong and you're going to be wrong on timing the Only thing 95% of your investment returns are based on what he called asset allocation and they all agree with that it means if I'm going to invest $1,000 10,000 a million whatever it is I need to in advance have a plan of what percentage am I going to put in low risk environments where I'm G to have low risk but low return but it's
steady it's like the turtle and then I'm going to have some that are environments where there's more risk but there's the Potential for upside and then how I diversify that to protect myself not all my eggs one basket it's going to be critical most people know that well these guys have developed very specific asset allocations and one of the things that happened when I went to go write this book this third book I decided I was going to look at a different type of investment which we'll talk about in a minute which is private Equity
private real estate private credit yeah and when I did that I interviewed some of the smartest people alive in this area and I found out by doing my research KKR other people show that extremely high net worth people have a completely different asset allocation than the average person they have 46% of their money not in stocks not in bonds not in REITs but in private real estate private credit and the biggest one is private equity and so it's like knowing the formula third third piece is really important these Guys are all smart enough to know
you don't take giant risks because if you have a stock worth $100 or $100,000 and it drops 50% you have to make a 100 % to get even if 100,000 drops to 50 and you grow it back 50 you only have $75,000 so they understand this so they always look at risk differently than most of us they look to see how they can get asymmetrical risk reward that's a big word it means how do I take the least risk with the most upside so Paul Tutor Jones I've coached for this you know basically quarter of
a century almost and with Paul his whole philosophy is I don't want to make an investment I may be wrong but I'm want to believe that I can make I'm going to risk a dollar to make five not risk a dollar to make 10% or 20% like most people I'm looking for a five to one that way if I'm wrong I can risk another dollar I still make four he can be wrong four times out of five and break even so That puts the game totally in a different place and so the problem is most
people know where to find asymmetrical risk reward so I look for those places to show them and then the final one is the one we all know diversification you want to not put all your eggs in one basket diversification is the only free lunch and that diversification means diversifying not putting all your money in one stock not putting all your money in stocks so it's Not just the type of investment the category or you don't buy one piece of real estate you got to diversify locations elements you got to diversify across timelines so diversification is
cre so all these guys agreed to those four so I I was thrilled with what I did I money Master the game is the most successful Financial book of the last 24 years of this Century 23 years so I'm proud of it and unshakable also exploded but what I was fascinated by was people Are so crunched right now the biggest question people are asking is like how do I get those returns and so you know for years Bonds were so low everybody put all their money in the stock market and you know for the most
time they got by with it few times there were significant drops but it's only a matter of time before the system balances out now bonds have raised right and we've seen that you can get some returns on Bonds in 5% range pretty easily but most People need more of that kind of return a larger rate to get to where they want to be financially so this is the part most people don't know 35 out of the last 35 years private equity which is companies that have their own money that invest in companies they buy a
piece of the company or all the company they change the CEO they change the marketing they grow it they don't just buy something hoping it'll go up they make it better and then they Sell it for a multiple of the growth they got to a larger company or they take it public 35 out of 35 years across the world private Equity average private Equity has outdone every stock market in the world so I give you an example in the US for the last 35 years the S&P 500 has given a 99.2% return so you're compounding
your money on average 99.2% which is damn good but private Equity average private Equity not the guys I've got in this Book right these guys by the way average 20% or more for decades continuously compounding it's mindboggling what they do because it's a totally different approach it's and they don't have to sell when the market goes up and down so when it goes down they buy when it goes up they sell because the money is usually locked up for about five years in most of these situations so they have cash flow they're in great shape
anyway think of this 99.2% private Equity Average ones are 14.2 now let me explain what that means your average investor may not understand that's mind 50% greater returns every year compounded year after year so let me help you understand what that means if you take a round number a million dollars you put in the stock market 35 years ago in the S&P 500 it's worth $26 million today if you never did another thing it's pretty unbelievable but if you put it in private Equity it's worth $ 139 million dollars right now that's why ultra high
net worth people have almost half of their money in private equity and only 29% in public equities public equities are still important they give you liquidity you got access to Great companies it's fantastic it's not like you get rid of it but they compliment each other but higher net worth people know this is where I'm going to get the better returns you got to fish where the fish are and so that's Why I got myself involved in this new book because there's so much more than that in this area but just to give you a
little feeling for it t there's also so much more than that in the book by the way everybody and why is this matter because we're going to get to your life stuff and mindset stuff I know all of you like hey you have Tony Robbins on there and you guys the two of you better be talking about that which we're going to in a minute why is this relevant I'm So thrilled that you many years ago started writing these books as Trilogy and here's the reason why it's very difficult to have some element of control
over your life if you're not trying to exert some type of control over the financial piece of your life so we're always talking about our minds and our bodies in the personal development space and Tony was obviously the the first person and the most cutting edged person to do that but there are other Elements in our life and if you're out of control financially and you live that way for years and years and years and years it has an impact on the other elements of your life and so understanding these parts of it's the part
of the success piece of the puzzle that's almost never discussed because it's that thing we're going to get around to doing eventually that's like saying I'm gonna get my mindset right and I'm going to get around to getting My body together we all know they're correlated and vice versa so when we talk about this Tony you know there's something you said in the book that I actually want to ask you for my own edification because I don't know private Equity has been reserved for the wealthy for many many years and in the book you allude
to the fact that there maybe there was legislation pending that may allow eventually unaccredited investors to participate it was a bipartisan type Submission has that happened yet and if it hasn't happened yet what's the likelihood that it will well it's already passed the house and it was bipartisan and when they come back from the holiday they're going to vote on the Senate and there's bipartisan support and what it does if for the people unaware of this these in Ms are the biggest returns you can get but you have to have a special status to go
there it's like only the most wealthy people Get access it's so unfair and so what's interesting is they say well because you got to be sophisticated well no you just have to understand how it works but what's interesting is you might be wealthy because you built the business and sold it that doesn't make you a sophisticated investor so the new rules are that passed by the house the Senate looks like it's going to as well and uh the new rules are simple you take a test and you become an accredit investor Normally you have to
have a million doll net worth or $200,000 a year in income or 300,000 per couple if for you to be an accredit investor which gives you access to some of these and then there's another level which is a qualified purchaser which you have $10 million of investable assets not counting your home and count your business so those things have limited who has access but even if you have money it's worse than that think of it this way it's kind of like The Velvet Rope to the best clubs you know you're out front and somebody wants
to get in because it's the club to get in these these firms have such great returns that it's like buying an exotic car or the Velvet Rope you know it's like they're all gone right away the Pension funds get them the wealthiest people in the world get them right the family offices get them and so I you know because I had relationships got access to a few of them but I was Frustrated I couldn't even get in and then it didn't matter whether I was qualified or not I couldn't get past the velet Rope you're
out in the cold with your money it doesn't matter you can't do it but here's the Breakthrough so on coaching Paul tutor I got to know when of PA t Partners who eventually uh started his own firm and we were talking one day and I was talking about the unbelievable returns that come from these private Equity private credit Private real estate type firms and how frustrated I am because every time I want to get into one I can't get in or I get this really tiny allocation that I can get in with right not meaning
and he goes Tony he said um and he kind of dropped down almost to a whisper and he goes brother to brother I should probably tell you where most of my money goes and I said well great I kind of leaned I mean this is a brilliant Financial guy right he goes did you know That the word they use when you invest in these firms they call you a limited partner in LP and if you own The Firm well you own all the funds you're the owner of the firm you're you know CEO CFO you're
in the SE Suite that type of thing then you're an owner well the owners they don't just make what the fund makes they make 2% on every dollar you give them and it's tied up for five years so that they have liquidity so the market goes up and down they don't have To worry about that and they can make sure they give you the best return so you tie up your funds for a little longer for a better return well they get 2% a year whether you make money or not and then when they grow
it they get 20% of The Upside and that's standard in the industry so picture this everybody loves guaranteed cash flow he goes you know Tony these are the wealthiest people in the world if you go to the fortune 400 and you say who are the richest people In the world are they in Tech are they in real estate no they're Financial Services guys and they're not hedge fund guys because they're go up and down some of them but very few it's the private Equity guys and he goes so here because they're making the 220 so
imagine this you have a billion dollar and you're making $20 million a year guaranteed fees for five years a $100 million guaranteed if they take their billion dollar firm and they raise it to two Billion they grow it over those five years they get 20% of The Upside that means they made 100 million in fees 200 million upside that's 300 million on initial billion dollar investment now I have one firm I invested in when we had started with them they had billion they have a hundred billion now so they're making two billion a year in
fees alone to give you an idea I get that 2 in 20 he said you can become a partial owner of the general partnership and like I Said I've got 65 firms now that I own two and 20 on so I am literally a GP I'm right beside them and I get about you know 10% of year in income they vary from 5 to 10% but about 10% of income and they get the growth in the business and if they ever sell the business I get a multiple on the business so this is like one
of those almost unknown Secrets even most wealthy people I know are unaware of this when they hear this they go crazy because it's the firm they're Trying to get in but now they own it and I don't just own that fund you get diversification I get the funds they invested when there was low inflation I get the funds that they're investing in now I get the funds they invest in the future it's it's it's a wild opportunity so that's just one of them in the book another one is sports teams I worked till I became
fairly wealthy and then I wanted to buy a sports team and the first team I got in was the lafc Football club because we were starting it out I was one of the original owners that started up and you know we won a national championship was pretty cool but the growth in it's been fun it's been great but I went through a Year's microscope to qualify to do that and you got to put some serious money on the line right just to own a team a piece of a team well there's new rules that have
been changed in the last three four years and if you have the right firm There's only a few that do it you can own multiple sports teams small slight of them and here's why that's valuable the S&P 500 the last 10 years has had a great run 11% compounded just in the last 10 years it's 18% for Major League Baseball NBA NHL and soccer combined it's it's giving the idea Michael Jordan bought the piece of the Hornets what uh was it 13 years ago I think 12 13 years ago he paid 325 million he just
sold it for three billion right my friend Peter Goober bought the LA Dodgers a few years back with a couple of Partners Magic Johnson a couple other guys and they paid $2 billion dollar for the LA Dodgers now no one had paid even a billion the most ever been spent on a baseball team was 850 million everybody said he's insane they've overpaid at least a billion dollars and I called Peter's my friend and partner and I said Peter you're no dummy I hear what everybody's saying I know that you know Something no one's telling you
and you know he's made 52 Academy Award nominated movies he's a genius and so I said he said I'm going to leave you on he said we're dear friends but he goes I want to leave you in suspense I'm going to make make an announcement next week as soon as you hear it call me and we'll laugh our tails off together sure enough the next week they announce he bought it for two billion he sold the local not the national rights you get a piece of Every team's an equal piece of every team's media it's
pretty cool but the local you own he sold the local rights for the Dodgers television for7 billion he made5 billion immediately so they're not just butts and seats anymore they're media companies 92% of the top 100 shows last year were Sports shows in terms of viewership and it's great because they don't have to like to make a series on Netflix you got to buy the actors you just set up your cameras and you shoot And you're ready to go and everybody watches because of cord cutting they still watch and they'll still watch the ads so
it's an incredibly lucrative business imagine it's a legal Monopoly you own that business no one can compete with you in those cities and you have Fanatics that's what fans comes from Fanatics fanatical customers who when you charge more for the you know inflation goes up and you pay 10 bucks for a hot dog people pay it and they've Been coming back for Generations it's an unbelievable business the third opportunity real fast you know bonds bonds have produced nothing up until this massive increase in the interest rates we've gone through that's been devastating for many banks
that were holding on to bonds right well in 2021 people were so starving for income you know from a bond that the junk bonds went crazy there was this explosion in people buying junk Bonds because they could make 3.9% instead of like one or two% and this has taken big risk to make less than 4% I was making 9% on private credit the entire time with less risk and so private credit is because Banks you know you saw what happened Silicon Valley right Banks Banks are tightened up and they don't loan as much so companies
that are anywhere from 100 million to say three to four billion there's 200,000 companies like that in the United States that are borrowing money all the time and who they borrow from is private credit but here's what's interesting if you don't know private credit I can give it to you in a metaphor if you at a house right now and you got a mortgage rate at say 3% or 4% whatever back then and it was fixed you don't care that the interest rates went up you're doing great but if it's readjust if it's a floating
rate you could be in trouble well all these Business loans are floating rate so these private credit firms loan money at five and six% that's what bank excuse business was borrowing at and guess what when the interest rates went up they float with it so now they're paying 11% plus it's the same loan it's the same time period but you just doubled or tripled in some cases your income stream when you own the private credit plus I get the two and 20 so it's like right these are you don't get you don't have To get
rid of your bonds these are a compliment to your bonds but they're M two to three times High returns there's the energy industry I go on and on and on I so here's the most important part though the reason it's called the Holy Grail to investing is because I interviewed Ray doio you know 10 years ago now we've become good friends over the years and I asked him a simple question I said the most successful investor in history he's got his fund Manages Bridgewater almost $200 billion dollar in business he do it for countries even
and I said you've got the big best track record out there what is the single most important investment principle that any investor needs to know he goes Tony you know the importance of diversification but people think of that in general don't put too many eggs in one basket he said I turned that into a science of saying how do I get the a s War I have the least amount of risk and the most amount of upside he said I found out it's simply this he called it the Holy Grail he goes the Holy Grail
of investing is toine 8 to 12 uncorrelated Investments now uncorrelated is Ser of understands stocks and bonds usually have been uncorrelated the idea that people put you in like 60% stocks and 40% bonds is that okay when stocks go down bonds will make up for it or vice versa well the only problem with that is During really rough times like 2020 they both went down equally 2008 huge drops and then your broker will tell you gosh no one could foresee this it happens every time you can foresee it right so right but but but they
don't foresee it is what they're really saying right so he said look you find eight 12 uncore Investments you reduce your risk 80% and you increase your upside you are protecting yourself while increasing your lowering your risk and increasing Your return so it's like taking those core four and putting them on steroids that I told you yeah you guys here's the value of all of this just I want to just stamp this for a second too okay it's the Holy Grail of investing you need to go get it or pre-order it now it wasn't until
I was worth nine figures that I knew what Equity was and then it's still I remember the day I finally got involved in one like you said I was like a waiting for the Rope at the club right Yeah and so I can just validate these things it's not it's by it's public information that I was a part of the group trying to buy the Mets that we lost out to Cohen I wanted to get involved in Major League Baseball we were the runner up to that group private real estate I've even done some bridg
loan investing stuff that's private as well this is the first book honestly I've ever read that does let you peer into what the mega wealthy and mega Successful doing and gives you access to the information I have literally never read a book like this before and I can tell you that it took me to like I have never I'm grateful you wrote it I'm grateful we're talking about it because it's I was 45 years old and worth multiple nine figures before any of these things were even ever explained to me and so if I if
I could have known this earlier in my journey you guys it would be a GameChanger and just imagine This just being armed with this knowledge the confidence that it would give you that you can win in your life that's just part of the game I think most of us feel like the game is kind of rigged against us and to some extent you're right there's been lots of places you haven't had access to that this book will at least Enlighten you as to where to go get that access and to have an education regarding it
in private credit do you know what their Dropout ratio is Of loans that go bad less than 1% any bank would die for that because they don't rates 1% that's awesome their money is on the line they don't sell the loans off so they're very picky about who they pick and they've got great leverage in terms of those relationships and the other part you got to know is literally everything is moving towards alternative Investments if you don't know about these things how are you ever going to take advantage and then you Think like you said
the system's rigged against you it is unless you educate yourself if you educate yourself I didn't learn about most of these things till I was 48 years old and like you said it's hard to get into some of these pieces to make happen now this is this is the democratization of alternative Investments and here's the other problem you got to know 1996 there are 8,000 stocks you could pick from in the US there's only 3600 now if you look at the S&P no if you look at the Russell 2000 40% of those firms are not
profitable 40% don't make money so people are basically betting in these environments hoping in these environments so I love being side by side as a partner with some of the smartest people in the world so for example if you go to Robert Smith the Vista he does SAS right software as a service he has built a system so he can take any company on give them the right coaching knows what to do to grow Them it's like a cookie cutter he grows them expands them sells them for huge profit goes goes to the next one
these people in this area what I love about it is they're adding value it isn't just a hope and a bet it's like we're going to take this company on and we're going to find a way to make it better stronger and more valuable and then we're going to get a piece of that upside that has been whole my whole philosophy in life is do more for others than anybody else Does add more value and you'll Prosper but you can't Prosper if you're aware of it by the way the book yeah I don't know when
people will be hearing this but the book February 13 gets released but if you go pre-order it and then you go to um uh the Holy Grail of investing.com holygrail investing.com there's a website there if you just give your digital receipt I'll give you the first chapter today on audio that you can listen to immediately and it already Gives you some the tools that'll blow your mind so you don't have to wait it's very cool you guys and by the way I know a lot of you your only Viewpoint of this kind of stuff is
like Gordon gecko from the days and they destroy these companies and I'm going to tell you right now it's not it's not how private Equity works now as Tony said they're making these companies better more profitable they execute for the consumer better as well so everybody wins here For the for the most part so let's shift gears because we're going to run out of time and I want to make sure that we get a chance to cover you said something earlier about you know with the Russell 2000 40% are not doing anything they're losing money
and we're sort of hoping that hope is not a strategy is something I learned from you many many years ago regarding life as well I think more than ever Tony people feel a sense Of what because you and I are in the same world we coach some of the same people we have the same sorts of people come to our events more than ever I feel like people feel like they can't get control over their lives and that's why the financial piece is so important and I'm wondering what your thoughts are if you were to
give somebody Castle first coming to this event but where would they begin obviously I know you talk a lot about mind and body you talk about Having role models are important I kind of turn the floor over to you someone's listening they so like hey man you know I want to get control of my life that the money part awesome what about my life what about my emotions what about my family what would you say to them I think the first thing you got to do is you got to create a compelling future what I
mean by that is anybody can deal with a difficult today if they have a compelling tomorrow right now there's so Much fear in the world that people are afraid I hear Millennials talking about they don't want to have kids because they want to bring them this world that's such a terrible world uh there's so much violence there's less violence today in the world even though we have this horrible War that's going on two of them now there's more than two but the two that most people are familiar with with obviously what's happening over there in
Russia and Ukraine and also What's happening in Israel and Gaza um but we have less of that than we've ever had even in the middle of this but the fear is bigger the promotion of it the watching about it the arguing about all that is enhanced by the way that we live today and the fears that are today so what I tell people is you need to create a compelling future you need to understand whether you're on the path or not I mean think about the hero's journey just for a second what is the Hero's
journey you're living your life over and over and it's boring you can pick any great story of humanity all the same stories they're all the hero's story at some level and then something disrupts it something creates a challenge it's the call to become more it's the call to go on adventure you might have lost your job you may have lost money you may have been told you got cancer you might have gone through a divorce you know there's a that's we Look at it as it's horrific experience but I've experienced I know you have as
well multiple experiences someone telling me you know I've buried you know three fathers and a mother of you know I've been in a place where they said hey you got a tumor in your brain you're not you may not survive I've been in those moments that were scary as hell but they were calls to be able to grow and then you go on the journey and as you go on the journey it's amazing when you commit To grow when you commit to figure it out you get yourself on that path what's going to happen is
you're going to meet mentors you're going to meet people along the way that'll show up that can help you and you're going to have to face your dragons you're gonna have to see what is it that you're is stopping you so I look at it this way the first step if you want to make your relationship better or your business better or your emotion anything that you Value your finances better the first step to being on the path am I on the path or not like first one is do you know what you really want
as simplistic as that is most people know what they don't want and so where focus goes energy flows so the first step it's like what do I really want why do I want it because the why is even more important than what it's like New Year's right people set their goals or their New Year's resolutions and by February They're gone right they're they're already broken them because they just were expressing what they wanted not why they wanted they didn't get enough reasons to push them themselves through and it was difficult and they didn't have a
good plan so the first thing is what do I want why do I want it who do I got to become to make that happen and you get crystal clear now you're on the path what's the second step of the path now you got to be honest you got to get To the truth and tell yourself the truth about the Gap because all of us have a gap between where we are and where we want to be if you want to close that Gap quickly the only way to do it is to be honest the
truth sets you free so you get clear where am I really compared to where I want to be and why what's prevented me in the past from losing that weight from making that money from having a relationship last from growing that business and there's only a few Things that prevent you it's fear it's and and there's all kinds of fears but fear it's limiting beliefs well I've never done it before I don't know what to do I'm not that kind of person I don't know numbers all my relationships end up all the good ones are
gone whatever the belief is there's a limiting belief there's a fear or there's some other Primary Emotion in the way or it's a habit or the fifth one is you're missing a skill like learning To invest as a skill if you don't take the time to learn it you're going to be in pain right because you're going to always trying to earn it and most people think well I'll make so much money that I'll never have to worry about when I hit the big thing well the people that make the hit the big thing the
athletes the entertainers usually are broke 20 years later you've seen it over and over and over again because they made the big dollars they have the big overhead but They never learned how to make money while they sleep they never learn to be an owner right an investor they just made income and no income is enough Mike Tyson's a friend of mine Mike made a billion dollars over his career just of a billion dollars and lost it all you know I can give you 50 Cent 50 Cent made all this money he bought Mike's house
and then he went broke give you an idea you know Elton John overspent and lost all the money he had unfortunately made It back eventually to make that happen I mean it isn't that is not the solution that you need so if you really want to transform you get on the path figure out what's missing then what do you do now you come up with a A you know a quick plan not a perfect plan but a quick plan to attack it with massive action and then what do you do now you got to face
your dragons you got to make the changes that are necessary then you have some daily practices there's like seven steps To this you measure and you celebrate and You Begin Again so I teach people the exact path and if you're not on the path it's scary if you're not on the path to Financial Security or Freedom it's scary if you're not on the path to Quality relationship or you're on a path right now that's leading to pain you better educate yourself but you got to start with what you want why you want it then you
got to see what's wrong with you not your partner what's the Challenge what's the Habit what's the emotion what's the triggers got to take a little action plan you got to make the changes and this process the hero's journey is you go on the journey you become more by facing these challenges you learn and you grow and then you bring that back home and you experience you know the rewards of being the hero in your own life and that's in essence what people need to be able to do and it's not that hard because there's
Patterns there's certain patterns that work I don't care what the color of your skin is how old you are or young you are I don't care what your nationality is I don't care what gender you are or your sexual preference these are are the laws of life if you understand the laws and you align with them you do well so one of the reasons we do this three-day process is in three days for just two and a half three hours a day people are able to get clear what they want exactly In each of these
areas they get clear what's gotten in the way they put come up with their plan they start to face their demons and they move the ball forward and that's how you get the kind of results that we've seen people get that are just mindboggling you know the people that just came and spent three days with us and if they want to go deeper they can go to some other event but we don't hold it back it's not partially free it's totally free and I Encourage people not in common do this because it's January 25th through
the 27th it's right around the time your newsic resolutions you had them are probably going out the window and you can do it with your friends or you can do it with your family together you can do it from home you don't have to travel you don't have any expense or you go to the office and do it with a group of your friends at the office type of thing but I promise you you'll be experienced You won't forget so you just you know if you get yourself in immersion that's how it changes the problem
is people try to a little bit at a time it's like trying to learn a language a little bit at a time people that learn language in high school and college usually don't speak it 10 years later but if I dumped you in Italy with no teacher and said I'm picking you up in 90 days because you're seeing it breathing it being around it around all day long in immersion you Learn the language last question by the way thank you for today we've certainly maxed out the hour we're a little bit over on an hour
but people get a chance to hear you hear the two of us together and this thing just explodes every single time hard question so and and dig deep on this one for me so you have a precious new little girl I guess she's getting older now but every time we talk I keep saying this precious new baby but she's actually older now and my son Max Is a college golfer and he's a really good golfer he's probably gonna go play professionally and this weekend I was watching tiger and his son playing that uh the parent
child tournament on on TV this weekend and I was thinking uh his son has such an advantage because his dad's Tiger Woods I mean it's a pretty good model and Mentor for your golf swinger how to chip how to putt how to hit a driver and I was thinking it kind of sucks that for Max that I'm his dad Because I have I have literally nothing to offer him except how to do these things wrong on the golf course so literally today no joke Tony today I'm like who's the best golf instructor in the world
turns out the dude follows me and I reach out to the guy I said I'd like to hire to coach my son he basically says no I only work with PGA Tour players but if you'll coach me I'll trade you for lessons the point that I'm making to you is it's awesome to have a Coach that's the best in the world that you can model Tiger's got that with his son and your daughter to some extent will have that with you as it terms in terms of Life strategy and so I'm just curious I asked
you this kind of last time and I said what would you wish for her and you said I'd wish love but your daughter's going to grow up in a world that is this AI world you know that you and I didn't grow up in and it's going to be All this new frontier there's this new technological Revolution that we're now in the middle of she's going to live probably a lot longer than you and I will right she's going to have a totally different world geopolitically to some extent than you and I did so the
challenges of life for this young girl when she becomes a young woman out in the world are going to be unique and so you're the Tiger Woods of of life and and Bliss strategy let's call you that Right now what what are are there three things a few things you would wish that she was equipped with when she leaves your home with you and Sage someday she goes out into the world you said I want her armed and equipped with this for Tiger it's for his son in golf it's how to chip or putt or
how to hit a cut or a draw on the golf course but in The Game of Life I'm curious as to what you would want her equipped with when she someday unfortunately leaves your home and goes Out into the world what would you want her to take with her I put a lot of thought into that obviously you know I have five kids and five grandkids and I have a daughter that that's 48 as I said and a daughter that's two and a half so I have quite a range my daughter is you know my
my grandkids are all older than my daughter and she's their you know ant so it's kind of interesting but uh the answer to your question is number one as I want her to have a philosophy of life That will guarantee happiness and there's only one that I know of and that is life is about growth and giving and so even at two and a half she has responsibilities in the house as part of this family she cleans her own table you know she takes her her fork and her stuff she brings it in when we
at the end of the night and we do all our vitamins we give them one for everybody and then she goes and shares them and she gives other people theirs first then Hers right life is about people the biggest challenge for people are unfulfilled as they think life's about me when it's really about we there's only so much joy you can experience in your own body through anything you know massive success acknowledgement from others I don't know sex music rock and roll doesn't matter by yourself it's only so much when you have a great experience
in life the first thing you want to do share with somebody you love Right so it's really life is calling us to grow because when we grow we have something to give and so she's learning Chinese right now Spanish and English and we were at a table last week and there was person Chinese person and she was talking back and forth between us and English and I know some of those Chinese words and some of those Spanish words not as much as she knows already at two and a half she's doing algebra right now I
I started her when she was Little a baby she's swimming right now she has plenty of time just to be there and I want for her autonomy I want her everything we do with her we don't tell her what to do we give her choices you want to do this or that and she gets to choose and some of them have consequences but she gets to choose she always knows there's a choice people always tell me you know this is I'm stuck this the only thing I can do is this that's [ __ ] and
one choice is No choice two choices The Dilemma my belief there's always at least three choices you may not like them all but there's at least three choices and once you find three there's four or five to get to where you want to go so I'm teaching her at two and a half to make choices the choices have consequences the life's about growing and giving and I'm helping her to also recognize those patterns pattern at this stage kids are so great at pattern so I wanted to own The identity that I'm great at learning because
for AI for everything that's coming you need to become learning more rapidly and that's pattern recognition pattern utilization and pattern creation so you know she's playing the piano I never got to have these choices so she has all these choices but also I make sure she's not going from one class to next class to next class she has time outside to just be and play and take in nature and be around I want her to be I Want her to have her own autonomy her own sovereignty so that she's not influenced by what everybody else
thinks that's also why she won't be on social media for a very very very long time right so those are as long as I can control it'll be a long time it'll be selective what she does so she's she also though has modeled her family like you know it's no [ __ ] it's like my wife and I are so head over in love we've been together 25 years now quarter Of a century you know so it's like there's no fights here we just I want everything that makes my wife happy she wants everything makes
me happy so she sees this environment of such love plus we have so many close friends that are chosen family for us you know so she models that she doesn't know anything different now she's going to go to a world that's not like that but she's going to have attachment strategies that are Totally Secure so she's not going to Be one of those people pushing it away or starving for someone else external affection so that's my goals I want her to have those pieces I want her to have Choice autonomy I want her the philosophy
of life as what are you here to give not what are you here to get and she's already learning that two and a half and we're only to do more plus it's not just me my wife is unbelievable she's the greatest Mom and we couldn't have a baby we went through IVF for Seven years three times a year holding my wife's hand we go through that horrible surgery and finally and I I kept saying honey we got to have a baby before I'm 50 I don't want to go to my child's High School reunion at
70 well now I'm going to go there when I'm 80 school high school graduation I should say and uh but I'm I'm a different Prime of life I'm so glad that I know what I have and I can share what I can with her but those are my core answers I'm always Looking for new things and my wife is doing the same but we want her to have joy and happiness you know only one thing that makes you happy progress when we grow we feel alive if you get a gift you get a goal you
achieved your ultimate goal you have one of two reactions after you get it is this all there is which is a horrible reaction or wow this is so awesome but how long do you keep the happiness about achieving that goal a year Six years no six months six weeks six hours six days most people somewhere between six hours and six weeks is the most they stay happy because we're not supposed to stay happy life has made us want to keep growing that you know so when you make progress though you make significant progress in your
body in your relationship in your Finance you're not there yet you lose the first 10 pounds oh you figure out how to investing now you got something to bring You a great income and Equity wow you there's an excitement with progress that doesn't go away so I would tell people progress is everything how are you going to keep making progress that's what's going to make you feel alive the people you see that at all the money and all the affection and all the you know everything around them that people think they want these movie stars
comedians whoever and take their own life why in every case if you do your homework you Can see they stopped growing they didn't feel Fully Alive anymore they got wrote In what they're doing and it became all about me or they got into drugs and alcohol and one day in a really bad state something really stupid so I can't control what my daughter will be like and I don't have that delusion or Illusion but I can do the best I can to give her an incredible base to make those choices from and that's what I'm
committed to and so is my wife and as I Started say she has a second mom because the lady who carried for us has been a dear friend of ours chosen family for more than a decade Mary and so we said Mary you should stay with us and do this you've helped bring her in the world so she literally has like two moms and me great and all these resources I think she's going to do okay so hey guys as you know I've partnered up with my good friend Brennan bruart who's created the greatest personal
development system That has ever been designed called growth day if you go to growth day.com sled you can get all the information but it's that time of year where everybody's trying to form new habits they've got new resolutions and goals and you need an environment and you need some coaches and you need to be able to do it super inexpensively and that's where growth day.com sled comes in there's everything from journaling to accountability programs live messages every Monday for Myself other influencers There's an opportunity for you to to get courses that would cost thousands of
dollars completely for free it's incredible go to growth day.com Ed and check it out speaking of Crisis we're in one sort of as a world right now uh and there's a lot of PE probably more than ever uh someone's coming to my show today with you and I going through probably some sort of a crisis it could be this is during covid if you watch this three Years from now hopefully you don't even remember what that was that's what we're hoping but but if you're seeing it when it's released we're in the middle still of
covid-19 and for a lot of people this has been a crisis situation they didn't see coming they've lost their jobs 40 million people just in the United States but worldwide hundreds of millions of people are out of work um maybe money they've saved for the last five six seven years is gone maybe a Fitness you know amount of weight they've lost they' they haven't been to a gym in 8 10 12 weeks and that's gone relationships strained because they're in the same house together this is sort of a crisis time anything you'd share with people
to thrive or cope or Thrive during this time that's been working for you yeah you I will and you know first I acknowledge the hardship so little advice on how to thrive is not to like go into denial like it's all great isn't It a Prozac right now no so for me my Mantra because I had some major things shift in in my business in life like Oh Come shows for the foreseeable future canell and and I know that's a one one millionth of what a lot of people are going through yet my Mantra I
had adopted right away was uh two things one was the mindset of this is either an opportunity or a catastrophe I'm gonna get what I'm looking for wise man named Dan Sullivan has said The mind I'm sorry the eyes can only see and the ears can only hear what the mind's looking for so I'm going to look for the opportunity yeah there's things going on I don't like and I'm G to look for the opportunity so the second piece of the mindset is more the action oriented one where I've done my best and I encourage
people to take this if it works for you have the mindset of surrendering to what I can't control and taking bold action On what I can control I can't control all of California's shut down I can't control how much of the rest of the country is shut down but I can take bold action on what I can control and and I'll tell you at least for me and I'm guessing some other people are part of the human condition with me so they might be able to feel this if I wasn't taking bold action on what
I can control I would have gone nuts just I guarantee it it's It's like the life energy that wants to live through us if if you don't give it an outlet it just it fries us we get depressed anxious we feel purposeless yet taking bold action on what we can control especially bold action on things that feel purposeful to us man I think that's a recipe for fulfillment and and I think that's a mindset that a lot of people can be served with time so so first off I really believe Whatever it takes for you
before I tear I thought what monger and and and Buffett did was so good I love those two guys um but before we get that like whatever it takes I'm just going to share if you take nothing else from this podcast today take this whatever it takes if it's listening to Ed melet's book or Tony Robbins or something from yourself or something else if there's something you read if something it's feel if you pray if you talk to God if You go to church I it's different from everybody but whatever it takes to keep you
you in a space of I'm going to live into my inner purpose I'm going to tap into my full potential rather than playing small and playing scared you figure out this isn't a show about personal development you can read Ed's book and lots of other things but do something to keep you focusing on where you can go and not sit on your hands I was with Tom Bilu two weeks ago when he Said during times like this people talk about fight or flight he goes that's not what happens here it's the third F they all
freeze so true and I was like wow I got Goose I was like that's right so unfreeze yourself whatever it takes secondly very good by very good so so the second thing once you start realizing that we're not giving you that answer today I'm saying go find that answer but the other thing I love what what Buffett said he said during a Recession during inflation invest in yourself get get better at what you decide to do than anybody else because if it's he said WR marks or seashells you'll just get more of the pie so
if it's a deflated dollar when you used to get two go get six because you're better at what you do so true I know it sounds so simple but it's like duh let me stop staring at the competition let me stop talking to my friends about how things can go bad you Know the conversation at your dinner tables are getting different be the only one that's saying no I'm going to find the gold in this downtime can I say something on that I just I want to play off that with you I'm big on this
quote of Separation season where I say hey it's the summertime everyone's flinching this is where you hit the accelerator because you don't catch people in front of you when they're at full speed it's harder you can but it's harder you catch Them when they Flinch they relax they freeze Y and that's there seasons and you usually it's it's seasonal meaning like okay August right people start to freeze or July they're gone they're flinching or Christmas time everyone takes time off then there are economic cycles that are separation seasons and I think that's where we are
now they're going to freeze they're going to panic they're going to buy into the collective group think of the world which is this Isn't the time to accelerate this isn't the time to do it and when they're going that way you go the other way the other thing that happens during these times if you find your lane you and I have both built tremendous wealth buying Assets in those times that were massively on sale and so you have the accelerator of both your brand your business doing well and you acquiring things at Super discounted prices
potentially so you have this double Multiplier let me ask you something you have had so much incredible success if we laugh at each other where we came from similar backgrounds very similar D but at this point I feel Beyond blessed with the success I've had I know you do too and amazing that the interview you just did I hope it's your number I hope the interview before me is your number one interview in history right um but I have a desire to work even harder right now because I know the Opportunities that are coming it's
a it's a mental like like I wish I could give it to everyone like I'm like how do I grind how do I make another X X Y and Z because I know that everything is on sale and everything's going to be even more deeply discounted so whatever it takes to motivate you when everybody's sitting down freezing having negative conversations you should be investigating look where the puck is going and say how do I accumulate more Cash so I can buy things at a discount because when it shifts that multiplier is unlike anything you could
imagine you go from doing okay to when people say how you doing you get that smile like pretty feel okay what's that look like for you right now like are you do you read certain things do you Journal are you visualizing are you looking for problems to solve like what's that look like for you all all the above I've been I've been geeking out on books different Books than I ever had before because listen we all like to learn right and we all grow um I'm keeping my mindset super strong but I think the opportunities
are going to come so strong and we have to be mentally prepared I think in times like these you do need to invest in yourself and grow yourself if You' have told me back in 1987 or whenever the heck it was that I got my personal power tapes and I read Unlimited Power by awaken the giant with win and Tony's Books if you'd have told me someone like Dean graziosi or Tony Robbins would give me their time for free where I can learn from them I just thought you were absolutely out of your damn mind
and so a couple things that I think you have to do during this window is you got to invest in yourself and if you can surround and change your peer group instantly with the best in the world you should do it you and I were talking off camera you and I are working on right Now me and you to spend a full day together to strategize about our lives and our businesses there's a bunch of things that I want to learn from you that you and I have talked about and so if someone can actually
get that time with you for free and with Tony Robbins that is a monster win the other thing I'll say is this great people want to accept challenges great people want to be challenged even in their most difficult Times in fact at this stage of My Life One of the frustrating things for me Dean is that you know it is a smaller Circle there's very few people who challenge me so I love when I work out with a training partner they challenge man three more three more I'm like all right you did three more I'm
doing one more the power of one more right to be so what you're doing with this challenge just tell us what it is and how they go get part of the challenge cuz at a Minimum what they're going to get this is what I'm fired up about they're going to get fed yeah they're going the time when you need it for I mean it's amazing to me that in this day and age you can get access people pay a guy like Robins millions and millions and millions of dollars to be coached to get a session
they pay me this they pay you this yet the everyday person right now that's out there everyday trying to change their life can get access to this stuff for Nothing in initially so tell us about it so we we launched uh about 4 years ago to let everybody know and it was the biggest online event in history we had 250,000 people show up with unbelievable and it started a movement this year we're doing the time to thrive Challenge and I I'll tell you what that is this is probably the last year we're doing it because
it is a lot of work it is five days with Tony and I about three two to three hours a day I'd like to say 90 Minutes but Tony goes long we have amazing guests like our friend Jenna Kutcher and brenon brashard and other amazing even Matthew MCC is coming to because he wrote green lights so over five days we're doing a time to thrive we're calling it time to thrive because it's not a time to sit on your hands it's not a time to freeze it's time to thrive we're calling it a challenge because
we're challenging people to take action challenging them to think Differently challenging them to play full out and see for themselves that they could be a part of this industry um and it's happening on August 2nd and over 5 days literally show people how to be in this industry and it's not kind of free it's completely free and if you know Tony what you do you guys are friends you've done a million you've done podcasts and you you know you've had deep conversations last year Tony said if We're going to go out go out with a
bang let's go five days and let's deliver time let's deliver value in a time when people need it so what I challenge you to do is just come to the challenge hang out with us for five days and see if this is for how do they get there Thrive 215.com okay my team just sent me the URL it's Thrive th h r i v e 215.com register for free not kind of free it's totally free but here's what I'd encourage you to do don't dabble just be Sometimes when it's free people it's like ah it's
free maybe I'll go like pretend you paid five grand you know you just said this I'm not saying two weeks ago on a Saturday I spent one full day with a guy in his company paid me 250 grand for the day yep right I'm not saying that to brag I'm just giving you a point of reference Tony's got a waiting list that people want to give him a million dollars a year to be his coach Yep this is free And it is designed for those to thrive in this shifting World okay Thrive 215.com okay so
guys go why do you think people are that way about themselves let's shift a little bit and stay on this topic though what is it about most of us that makes us think we're not worthy of being successful because it ties into this right I mean if we can unpack that I'm going to go do this if I don't unpack that maybe I don't I I've been struck All My Life by people that Just like I I in my case I'm critical of myself I'm hard on myself but I've never had this belief like don't
deserve to win I I may not thought I could right I don't know how I'm going to but I've not had it so all the way back there I'm like I just don't deserve to win I I or someone like me can't win I've not ever had that I've had all the other stuff but what is it wow that's that's such a good as you say that I've never felt that EI I always felt the cards might be Stacked against me this one's going to be rough not sure I can get through it me too
I've I've had sleepless nights a lot of them I've gone I've gone 6 months with sleeping 2 three hours a night cuz I'm stressed and you know I wake up and my brain's thinking thinking thinking I like to share that with people because I think when they see success they think man that was just probably a harmonious ride for you right I went through a divorce in the middle of it like I've Been through a lot of the things on the opposite side right but you've also worked with millions of people and you know that
a lot of them suffer from this yeah they do but you just said that I've never felt I didn't deserve it and and I would say it's I think it's society and especially we live in a society right now where when you're successful there's a lot of people that look at it as a negative right so we almost have this this negative association to sales we Have a negative association to success but I always here's the last thing I'll say about it I always I said this one time on stage randomly and the audience went
nuts but I just said when it comes to money and success it's like you're at a therapist money's on one chair you're on the other therapist is in the middle and you go I hate that money if I get that money I I I might change I might be a horrible person and then in the other part you're like but I need that money So I can have freedom and take care of my family and I need control and I don't want to work in this horrible job anymore could you imagine a therapist saying well
we got to get this straight do you hate money in that chair or do you love money I'm I'm really unsure and I think that's the conflict I think the conflict is we think I think money and alcohol just Expose and compound who you are you're a jerk sober you're a real jerk drunk right you're violent sober You're very violent right same with same with money and I think I think if you're listening to Ed mlet you have to realize that money is a byproduct of service and what money can do is listen when people
say to me money doesn't buy happiness I say you haven't given enough away right so true when I was on your stage I was compelled I was compelled by you I I watched your emotions behind camera when you were talking about the families in Texas I was compelled do you know how Great you're thanking me why like you're thanking me for something that filled my heart you know how great you know what $50,000 was to me at 18 I thought if I could make that a year I'd be the richest man alive and to be
able to sit on stage and say hey Ed let's let me give you another 50 Grand but at the same time I built two schools in Africa I fed 7 million people right uh I donated $600,000 last year to uh operation Underground Railroad how Blessed are we that we get to do those things right so I I don't know you know earlier I said you know Tony I like when he says get leverage I said get in the right mindset if if you feel that being successful that you don't deserve it or that money is
bad I'm going to tell you to dig into that find out where that is ask yourself one of the simplest ways I always do is ask yourself why seven times why why do I think I don't deserve it uh I'm not that smart well why do I Think not being smart has anything to do with being successful and just keep asking why over and over again and you'll get to a point where you'll start getting emotional and be like everything I just shared really really good because it's a story We you're the best at talking
about the story We Tell ourselves let's stay on this just for a second because I feel like all of this is tied together in order to participate in the challenge and I also every week I Want people on here to CH their life every single week it's why I do the show you know like I said there's only been two humans come back here three times you and Dr Joe dispenza and because I just think that you you work on this story thing so well with people so I have this new show as you know
coming out I can't say a lot about it but it's it's it's a show where I intervene in people's lives it'll be out the end of August beginning of September and one of The ladies on the show had gained a bunch of weight like 180 lbs and uh and then had lost like 90 of it gained it back and did that a couple times and in the middle of it I said let me why do you have all this weight on your body and I said there's two things I said one you have the identity
she adopted the identity of a heavy person who happened to have lost weight and in that case she's going to get back to that identity so she was a heavy person who lost Weight I said I won't say her name but I said we have to adopt that you're a healthy beautiful vibrant woman who's gained weight can switch this identity switch that in chapter two I think you about the thermostat same you shifted thermostat shifting this story and then later I said listen we don't do anything in our life that there's not some benefit for
even if the majority of it is detrimental so this story you're all telling yourself those of you that Suffer that you don't deserve it you're doing that for a reason that you get something for doing it and in her case she said I think I hide in my weight that as I start to lose the weight maybe people are going to see other things in me that I don't think wow I can handle and it was really this very emotional breakthrough I want people to watch the show so I'm not going to get there's there's
10 of them but about that that this story We Tell ourselves Dean even Though it may not serve us there's some service in it that we can hide in it yeah that it masks other things in our lives and I think for everyone listening to this right now this could be the Breakthrough moment of your life as we just talk about this concept this thing you keep telling you about you that holds you back from jumping into a challenge holds you back from starting a business holds you back from getting into that relationship or getting
fit Like you know you should or asking yourself the right questions you're getting something from it even if massive most of it's negative for you how does one just in general start to change the story they tell themselves about their life cuz you're the master of this well you know and and I know if you're if you're a listen to Ed myet you've heard this before you've other people talk about it but I think it's maybe this is the first time you get to Really feel it or maybe this silly version that I'm going to
give you sticks with you and if this is why you're here today this is why you're here here's the way I look at it we need pain sometimes to disconnect from a story you know somebody asked me about success once and I would love to say I was always aspirational I wanted more I didn't want to be like my dad and struggle and be like my mom who worked three jobs to make 90 bucks and I I had This vision of something bigger and better and and being in control of my life and all those
things sound good at this phase sometimes you got to go to the dark side yes I just didn't want to be them my father was miserable and fought with everyone and he'd be in love for 6 months and be divorced within three and always mad and sometimes you got to give your permission give yourself permission when I went in my toughest thing when I Needed the extra boost the the turbo boost to get off the ground I'm like you're going to end up like your dad you're going to end up broke you're going to end
up alone you're going to end up not in control of your life someone else is going to tell you how to raise your kids and how to dress and when to go to work I would I would push myself so sometimes the you got to go to the dark side to get the momentum and I'm I'm telling you to use that to shift Your story right so so I I'm you know Tony always says to get the rocket off the ground all the energies in the first couple of feet and then once it gets in
space you hit the button you're a th000 miles an hour right do whatever it takes to get the rocket off the ground if to start the new business to say I'm worthy to shift the story if it's pain that'll drive you then use the pain because half of us run away from Pain half of us run towards pleasure we know that you you Use the one that you're accustomed to and and amplify it right my gosh amplify the pain y most people Joe despen would probably tell you not to do that and I love that
guy and I'm glad you had him three times but I needed that mhm secondly you know the story if you think back I could have made it but or I would do it or that's how you find this the number one thing I I'm I'm you know I don't have the money I don't have the time my family thinks I'm nuts I I could Never do something like this I'm an introvert I don't have a following I don't know what that is but here's the way I look at it if you spend enough time today
and this is my quick hack on stories if you spend enough time today you can find the one thing there's lots of them but you can the one that's probably held you back the most so the two things I would say is go look at what it's already cost you again this is personal development 101 I don't want to Act like I made this up but I want to remind you today we all need reminder services this story this thing this Too Young Too Old not money it's already cost you pain you already missed opportunities
you already let the ship go down the track the train go down the tracks you didn't start the business you didn't go for the relationship you didn't fix that thing and it's already cost you a lot so what I say here's a cool way to look at it'd be Like two armies mhm you already know the story that will come up when you decide to go all in when you say you know I don't care about I'm going I'm starting the business I'm scaling the business I'm not gonna you already know the Army that's coming
you already know the story that's going to gohh Ed little Eddie you know come on Ed you know you know where you came you know what your house looked like when you were little you know you weren't that good in school you know you Cheated in nth grade you know you cheated your way through this up I'm just saying but it's biology yeah accounting so so if you use the dark or the light whatever you need to get the engine going if you identify the story that's already cost you and you really think about it
it becomes painful but here's the thing as you think about this next thing you want to do you want to thrive in a shifting economy if that story is coming it's like you're going To war but the the Scout went out and you know that the other Army is two days away you know what kind of guns they have you know how kind of horses you have you already here's the thing you already know your enemy so if you're not preparing and fortifying and creating the things that block the enemy then you're kind of inviting
the story back so you could be you know how many Uber drivers have you had I haven't been in Uber in a while but before Co when You're in Uber how many Uber drivers did you say oh man I was I was on my way Dean I I love your books and 07 when the market shifted I lost my business I'm just said the hell with you know any of those stories I've heard me too what they've done is they let that Army come in that story come in because at least they have something and
what I want to tell you is if you really want more you know your enemy the number one enemy is that story that's held you back You can fortify the gates you can decide to turn that story around and you cannot let it in yeah by the way I let's stay on this everyone this is like kind of breakthrough stuff even though you you I want you to hear me on this there's a lot of talk in person about breaking patterns I talk about all the time you do Tony does there's also a lot of
power in leveraging them and this idea there's two things that are going to move every human being Dean told you it's either to Avoid pain moving from pain or to gain pleasur absolutely and usually most human beings I I think in general pain avoidance is the stronger of the mechanism but it works for both people you need to know which one moves you so you've already said yours is pain avoidance yep right so is mine the truth is I've become a pretty big dreamer Visionary guy but I wasn't yeah it took me a long time
to get there long time to get there and the fact is I only really Got really good at that after certain dreams were achieved but why I had to figure out which one moves me more okay avoiding pain moves me more even to this day why it's more familiar to me I grew up in pain so go take a look at the video of your life did you grow up in a really beautiful environment with lots of love and dreams and Bliss and all this great stuff maybe your mover is more ble dreams and Bliss
if you grew up in some pain chaos angst fear anxiety Stress that's probably your pattern and instead of trying to spend all your life breaking that pattern there's part parts of it you need to break your be your behavior from it but the mechanism itself for change for me is pain and pain avoidance I'm familiar with lots of pain and so to this day why do I prepare for speeches or podcasts or things so bad is it because I want the pleasure of a great podcast yeah that's there no you don't want to screw up
I don't want to Screw up I don't want to make a mistake I don't want it not to be good why do I work so hard is to make difference in the world obviously okay so you I don't think anybody listening would know the kind of work you put in Ed seriously I don't think I I don't think they know that you started at 3:30 going to do four podcast you're going to jump you're going to go take a suit you're going to go do an event tonight you're going to get up in the morning
fly someplace I Don't think anybody would realize it are you doing that because you want to sell more books or are you doing it because you don't want to sell just one I I'm doing it because I don't want to just sell one right and now now you've evolved because you know every time a book gets in someone hand you get to change their lives I do so you just nailed it I was just going to say the other part of it is impact for me right so you know the impact but you're not Saying
but I know for a fact you're getting up tomorrow morning subconsciously not saying I'm getting up tomorrow cuz I don't want to you're getting up subconsciously CU you don't want to fail that pain hurts and everybody told us we weren't going to make it and our parents probably thought we weren't going to make it and all that kind of stuff it's a major driver and by the way my impact stay with me on this cuz I know you're this way too cuz you Grew up in pain the impact I make still comes from Pain meaning
this I know so many people are in pain and because I connect with their pain their lack of belief in themselves they're feeling invisible they're hurting right now they want to be happier that connection of pain is still the impact I want to make so a lot of it is connected somehow to pain in my life and it is for you too it's like one is avoiding the pain of failing or not being successful or not Ending up in heaven which is that picture of who I'm capable of becoming like do I really want to
just get to heaven or is it the pain of not becoming that man it's both but also even the impact part where I go I want to make an impact in people's lives is because I connect with pain I connect with the discomfort and you want to get it out of them I want to get it out of them so that's a major driver for me is pain and I know my map and I know my pattern and That's why so many athletes by the way when their career is over they have a very difficult
time one their identity was tied to their athleticism but also there's no pain to avoid anymore now they're getting pat on the back you were great I loved your games there's no pain to avoid there's nothing to fill so I I got to think you're that way too I am and and the only reason I share that is because I hope you don't use pain to be successful for the rest of your life but You can use it as that launching pad it's and you can use it as a launching pad to start the business
to show up for the challenge to play full out to do something uncomfortable right the the term I've been using since Co is we all take need to take more uncomfortable action did it surprise you that I said I don't want to just sell one book or did you think that's what I was going to say I knew that's what you're gonna say okay because it's me right I play like I'm 10 Points down Tony and I are doing this challenge right we're going to put a million people in it that's the goal last year
we put 900,000 in right czy and it changed a million people's lives right this year I I attack this head as if two people are going to show up because I know if you show up I know the end result I saw hundreds of thousands of comments a day of like oh my God I didn't know it was going to be like this oh my God I love you Tony I love you Dean I love you thank you thank you and you know that driver just like the com I see the comments coming in for
your book you want to sell another 200,000 copies in the next two weeks so you can help people I will play like I'm 10 points down through this entire challenge I will rehearse I've already watched the last two years that we did this I watched what Tony did I watched what I did he's doing the same thing we're prepping if people are going to show up Even we want to deliver something that's transformational but I'm going to look through the lens of not wanting to fail still because that's how that's this the I'm avoiding the
pain of it not working at the level of the impact that I want to make y right and and I know we went down a couple different rabbit holes but I just want to give people permission today heading into a recession heading into a shifting world again I hope it doesn't but it looks like an economic Winter is here I'm going to tell you use whatever leverage you can use to move just move in a direction investigate look where the puck is going look for something different explore question every story that comes into your head
know your enemy that story that's already screwed you over and cost you too much you know that how do you shift that story how do you barricade it how do you not let it in how do you talk to someone like whatever you got to do I Just believe this is an crucial time I do too in people's lives and I think that what you do the next there's this analogy in anti-aging David Sinclair Dr David Sinclair has been on my show a few times and he goes hey if you can get to like 75
in this day and age you're probably going to live to 100 if you can get to 75 and in the world today I really believe that if you can get this next two years nailed yeah you've got 20e type multipliers of wealth Bliss and Happiness in your life if you can get the But if you don't these next two years I think the difficulty of getting there is magnified by a huge factor I think right now is a chance to get way ahead that same analogy to get to 75 gets you to 100 think if
you can get these next two years just momentum you have to make millions of dollars but you just get momentum you get in your groove you get moving but if you stay stagnant another Couple years you don't get something going the longer you do that it's harder to get that sucker going again and I feel like it'll be much harder those people that get moving now they get and by the way it might evolve you may start marketing one thing right now and it evolves into something else over time but you've got to get in
motion right now do you agree with that oh true story I heard somebody say it's a strategic byproduct how many times in life have we Had a goal and when we have the nerve to go after the goal we find something as a strategic byproduct the go it's way bigger way bigger you never thought you'd have one of the top podcasts in the world one of the top books in the world it's a strategic byproduct of you going all in on your businesses wanting to impact others great Point that's a great point so know that
when whether it's God the universe rewards you for just having the nerd to go after it and Usually your goal you're something so much bigger or something different that actually aligns with you there's a couple things I I think as we as we're at this point in the podcast I want to say this there's a couple things if you're going to protect yourself build a moat build a moat on your emotions and and what I'd say is the news is going to get worse that's a fact conversations with your negative friends is going to get
worse that's a Fact I would say if you really want to stop dabbling you know it's somebody who saying they want to lose weight but when no one's watching they're they're eating the wrong food or someone says they want to start the business no one's watching they're binging out on Netflix you know if you're that person and I'm not knocking you if that's who you are enjoy it live it but don't say you want it don't talk out of two sides of your mouth like either go all in burn the Boats and do it or
just accept the life that you have like I I I hate to be real but you can't lose weight and not work out and eat bad like it just doesn't you can't make more money have Ed's life or someone else's life that you see you can't have that without putting the work in so if you're going to put the work in you have to have the mindset to be committed and dedicated to it right we have to be disciplined yeah what robs discipline is lack of confidence M Insecurity uncertainty whatever word you want to use
so here's what I'm going share what are the things that make you uncertain or lack of confidence I would build a moat around those things if there's certain people in your life that are going to make you feel insecure believe me it's going to feel worse during a recession and tough time spend less time with them or find a way to be a mirror or be a Teflon if watching the news whether it's CNN MSNBC or Fox Whatever one you want to watch if when you watch the news you get frustrated you get scared you
get uncertain you get pissed off stop watching the news you need that energy for you so what I'd say is I would figure out the things that Rob your confidence and Rob your certainty and this is going to sound like oh Dean's really smart is do less of those like especially over this next year you want to like you want to take a challenge go on a 30-day news diet don't Talk about it don't watch the news don't talk and spend 100% of that energy on you 2.0 SP take the next 30 days and do
not surf the Internet all of you are getting sucked into let me just see what Ed mlet did and an hour later like oh my God I just burned an hour online right I would say just find the things avoid the things that Rob your confidence don't talk to the negative people that are hurting you don't focus on your weaknesses identify who your villain is Who that inner that inner story that's already cost you too much and protect yourself against it investigate to where the puck is going you do those things in this time you're
ahead of 95% of the world and they're simple that's not I didn't give you a business plan I gave you just the the foundation of of what can make you thrive in this shifting time when I hear you say all those things I think about energy I think about do things that preserve and Increase your energy and don't deplete them so if there's people around you that Rob your energy you got to reduce it if there's things you're doing that take your energy whether it's worry fear surfing the internet watching news those other things energy
you know and we all talk about I don't know who's first at it or whatever but energy is influence we've talked about this a lot Tony talks about it a lot you do I do and energy is also the most important commodity you Can possibly have in your life and you're going to watch a bunch of people whether you call it words thoughts Etc you're going to watch a lot of people starting now through the next two or three years of their lives you're going to watch their energy change you're going to watch their vibrational
frequency shrink you're going to watch them shrink and that's incumbent upon you to feed your energy right now that's podcasts that's books that's events That's a challenge like what you're doing right now with Tony you got to feed your energy highest energy wins highest energy will win and though Amen to that and I'm going to tell you everyone's energy is going to evolve and change it is difficult when everyone's thriving why everyone's energy is pretty damn good high energy will stand out now positive energy optimistic energy movement energy is momentum energy is going to stand
out more than ever and You're going to see energy change in your investments in your mindset and your businesses all over the place it's pretty amazing that you you grew up with this unbelievable gift of your talent your Texas football is religion you're a quarterback you're unbelievable you're going to the best place to go play you come from a good family then you have even all these other upsides that happened so that happens it's 13 years ago today and now you've made this Commitment to your mom well there's commitments and then there's commitments so I
know very little about prison but I have had some good friends go so I want you to walk us through this now you've made a commitment to your mom that you're not going to get involved in one of these racial groups which is where most 99.9% of the guys go to hide at some point and even those groups sometimes you have to fight your way in so what's that like you're in prison now And I'm sure the Aryan Brotherhood are trying to get you in the get you into their good graces and everybody else is
coming after you would would would he just start fighting or what happen yeah well I mean you know to answer the question I've got a I've got about two months here while I'm in Dallas County Jail waiting to be transported to the Texas Department of Criminal Justice they sent a prison bus to can pick you up with guards that are armed but in That two-month period is awesome I'm running around Dallas County Jail and I'm asking all these guys had been in prison before how am I going to survive what am I going to do
I'm in game mode now I'm like oh man this is really happening and and every guy I talked to Man black white asian Hispanic they say the same thing you got to get into a gang you will not survive without a gang they told me the lie that so many people here in the in the streets of America The gang will be your family the gang is going to love you the gang is going to protect you all lies Ed now what wasn't a li they said you're going to the worst part of the prison
system where everybody in the building you live on has life they call this the life sentence building Jes West get into a gang save your life get into a gang but there was this one guy that was so different in Dallas County this old black man named Mr Jackson and Mr Jackson's what you call a career criminal dude's been in our prison all was like four or five times right but it's the most positive guy I've ever met this guy had a smile on his face everywhere he went you could knock the smile off of
Jackson's face and every morning man every every morning this man would come up to my cell to my bunk and he'd picked me up like a ray of sunshine in that dark place with this positive energy right so one morning Mr Jackson Comes up he's got a cup of coffee in his hands this is awesome and a smile on his face he said West he said I've been watching how you're dealing with those knuckleheads and those dummies talk about you got to get into a gang he said do not list these fools he said you
want to keep that promise you met to your mom and your dad then let me tell you what prison is going to be like so he tells me he said the first thing you need to understand about prison he said prison Is all about race and he said race is the big dynamic in there because all the inmates wanted to be about race and and he was right at I mean that's the whole overriding dynamic of prison he said because it's about race when you walk in the door of the life's in this building he
said you're going to see a TV set in that day room and in front of the TV set they have rows of benches he said the first row of benches you can't sit on that row that's for the blacks you get Your head smashed in you sit on that row the second row you can't sit on that one either that's for the Hispanics they'll smash your head in too he said the third row if there's a third row is where the white folks sit he said if there's no third row white folks sit on the
floor that's the way the numbers work in prison he said it's the opposite of the Free World you don't have the numbers in there like you have out here so don't get into a wreck over race he said but Because it's about race when you walk in the door the white gangs get the first dips on you he said the Aryan Brotherhood The Aryan Circle the white Knights the woods he's naming all the white prison gangs he said you have to fight all of them if you want to be independent from them he said you
don't have a choice in this you have to fight if you want to be independent he said if you don't give in to their ideology hate out of fear and let me tell you what I Learned about fear I learned that fear is a liar fear makes you see things that aren't there makes you believe things that are not real in fact I would argue fears aren't even real fears in your head fear fear is how you perceive a situation danger is real you have to respect danger but fear is not real and Jackson's telling
me don't give into this artificial thing called fear but get ready cuz once you get done with the white gangs the black gangs are coming Next the Crips the Bloods The Gangster Disciples meningo Warriors he's nameing all the black yeah he said you have to fight all them he said if you survive all this Wes and he said and you can survive all this he said you're going to earn the right to walk alone he said the strongest man in prison always walks alone wow he told me about fighting and this is a truth that
I've shared I've spoken to hundreds of audiences the last six years since I've been out of prison And this is something I always leave him with he said you don't have to win all your fights but you do have to fight all your fights what a lesson in life right because that tells you that some days you're going to win and some days you're going to lose I'm not saying losing is a great thing you should aspire to but you're going to lose sometimes and you're not going to win all your fights but when you
lose get up and that's what he's saying don't stay down get up but When he's telling me this back in 2009 man 13 years ago I'm looking back at this guy a deer in headlights man oh this violence and Terror I'm about to walk into so he says Wes let me break it down for you another way he said I want you to imagine prison that's a pot of bow in water this is the best thing I've ever heard right what you're about to say oh man this is it's wild and this is something that
everybody can grab onto this thing this is the whole Crux of the Presentation he said imagine prison as a pot of Bo and water he said anything we put to this pot of boil water is going to be changed by the Heat and the pressure inside that pot he said I'm going to put three things in this pot of Bo water and watch how they change a carrot an egg and a coffee bean so he walks me through it he said so first things first he said if I put a carrot in the pot of
B water we call prison he said what happens to the carrot and I'm Like Mr Jackson the carrot is gonna turn soft he said that's right Wes he said but the carrot went in the water hard but the water the prison turned that hard carrot soft and mushy and weak didn't take long in said the carrot got beat he got robbed May got raped May got killed you don't want to be this carrot West he said what about the egg what happened to the egg in the pot of born water we call prison and I'm
like Mr Jackson the egg is going to turn hard Man like a hard Bol egg he said that's right Wes he said the egg has a shell that protects it physically but inside that shell that soft liquid core the egg heart became hardened he said if your heart becomes hardened you're incapable of giving receiving love and he said if you're incapable of giving receiving love in that place you've become institutionalized and you will not come back as someone your parents recognize he said because your eggshell is going To have swastikas tattooed all over it then
he asked me he said what about the coffee being West and Ed I didn't have an answer for this dude I didn't know what happened to a coffee being in a pot of blowing water and that's when this man this man that looked nothing like me he didn't come from the same America I came from Ed didn't believe the same things I believe fundamentally or spiritually this is a black Muslim man from the streets of Dallas Texas y'all I'm a I'm a white Catholic guy from a little bitty town called Port Arthur but this man
so different than me shared with me one the most important and transformational messages I've ever received and I tell people all the time man if you ever shut yourself off to people because of their differences different race different gender ethnicity religion sexual orientation man if you close yourself off to people because of their differences you're Going to miss some of the most important lessons and some of the best friendships in this life amen because this man told me that day he said if I put a coffee bean in that same pot of B and water
we call prison he said now you have to change the name of the water water to coffee because he said the Coffee Bean Head he said the Coffee Bean had the power to change the entire atmosphere inside that pot cuz the power was inside that coffee bean and he said just like The powers inside you and he told me the coffee beans is the only thing that will change the water the carrot is changed by the water the eggs are changed by the water coffee beans are the only thing that changed the water and the
last thing he tells me the last thing I hear from Mr Jackson he says Wes go out there and go be a coffee bean now Ed I walk into prison and it is a baptism by fire man inside the first 10 minutes man I'm in a fight with a big huge Aryan Brotherhood guy dude beats me from one side of the day room first 10 minutes man it's and it's all and Jackson told me what to expect he said man the first guy that comes up to you when you walk in the door he's not
a threat he's an information gather he's a scout he's going to he's going to be a white guy because you're white he's going to ask you this question what gang do you want to be a part of what family do you want they call gangs Families get him out of your face as fast as you can and get ready he said cuz the second guy that comes up he's not coming to talk to you he's coming to fight you he said he's coming to hurt you he said when this guy gets within range put your
fist in his mouth hit him as hard as you can don't even let him get a word in and when I walk in the door man I'm there I got my bags in my property I set them on the ground put my back against the wall stumbling up in a Couple minutes a little bitty white dude a little B head wi you tatted up from head to toe even his eyelids are tatted up right he comes up he gets to my face hey white boy what family you riding with look at your face change man
M I'm like dude I'm riding with God please just leave me alone I'm riding with God he laughed at me Ed he said God isn't here white boy cuz we kicked him out he said but we're here and we're coming to get you get ready stumbles up the stairs Few minutes later biggest cornfed white dude I've ever seen in my life he's coming down he points at me from third row huge dude muscled up man he's coming down the stairwells Baldhead with a swasa around the top swasa on the Dome of his head man all
I see is a swasa 2 be the eyeballs and muscles coming at me dude Ed I played Sports all my life man when that guy got within range I can be coached bam I hit the dude as hard as I could didn't even phas him this dude Beat me down but Ed that was what life was like in prison for the first two months I spent fighting there fighting for my life but but I had the I had Mr Jackson telling me that you don't have to win those fights but you have to fight those
fights and I lost most of my fights in there head I I tell people all the time man I probably got three dozen fights the whole time I was there and lost 75% of those fights that's what I wanted to ask you physically lost Ed Imagine waking up every day knowing that you're going to get your butt handed to you but that's your day and you have to face your day and it it was a training ground was a massive train if you want it to be it's a massive training ground it's finding that opportunity
and adversity it's what you talk about Ed the other side of your adversity the other side of your fears is the best version of you but I had to go through all that to get to where I wanted to be I want to talk about this some more by the way now everyone knows what the heck I was talking about when I introduced you first 10 minutes man we're rolling we're rolling there's a lesson in there I want to share with you that I got from my dad's sobriety and I know we'll talk a little
bit about this as we go today too but so about 3 weeks ago man I wrote this whole book about you know the one morees and I woke up I woke my wife up I was really emotional I said babe wake up Wake up W and I said hey I said um someone helped Daddy she said what I said someone helped my dad the most important decision in my entire life is my dad's decision to get sober you and I are probably aren't talking if he doesn't I've reached millions of people cuz my dad made
this decision my kids my my dad's grandkids our whole lives are changed it never occurred to me man someone helped my dad yeah I didn't think about it and she goes my gosh I Said that precious Soul who met my father in the darkest moment of his life the most dark ashamed place of his life completely changed my father's life forever and changed mine and millions of other people's lives yes they didn't even know it I said babe that's crazy one human being in their Humanity reached out and helped my dad in some dark room
or a coffee shop or a bar somewhere I said that's not the most amazing part even though that's amazing What qualified this person to help my dad give me chills dude dude what qualified them to help my dad was the things they were the most ashamed of yes was their drunkenness was their drug addiction was the things they did they're the most embarrassed and ashamed of that they think disqualified them from ever doing anything great in their life or maybe their average ordinary existence was the very thing that prepared them God Was preparing them to
Intervene in my Dad's life and changed my family forever absolutely and I can see it in your eyes that's the same thing with Mr Jackson This Guy's you're you talking to him at the jail because he'd been in that system and was still there the things that he probably made the biggest mistakes of his life are what prepared him to serve you and help you in the most scared dark moment of your life his things he's most ashamed of and embarrassed by is what his Preparation was was to change your life absolutely it was his
knowledge that was what he had to pass on that was his great contribution to humanity was was passing this on to somebody he felt was worthy of the knowledge that he had gained the hardest way possible man come on man this is this is what people that's what your dad got from his sponsor man and that's what millions are getting from you here we go so here's the thing this is what people need to Get about life these things that you think disqualify you are actually the great qualifiers for you to help change other people's
lives including your own they're not liabilities man they're assets that's right people I don't know if if there's ever been a more Magic Moment In a podcast in the history of podcast than this because it's a freaking fact that that person changed my Dad's life Jackson saves your life probably right well yeah and now you're Now telling the story of The Coffee Bean which by the way is a book that you and John Gordon wrote that people can get is is about the Coffee Bean which is an incredible book that's a story no one will
ever forget the history of their life but it's the fact that you had drug addiction and meth addiction and committed these crimes that qualifies you to sit in the seat today that qualified Jackson to be with you that qualified this person to help my dad That qualifies me to share this stuff with people it's insane how this stuff works in life it's mindboggling man because it's it's it's it's like everything is connected we are all connected man and if we're willing to turn our mess into a message and that's the thing man it's like everybody
that's one of the things I want to come on your show fore because I know I know you got a lot of listeners out there that struggle cuz everybody's struggling Every you meet in life struggles in life man but it's it's tapping into each other that that's how we're going to get through we have to serve each other this is my way of serving by passing on this message to Jack not only pass on the message that Jackson gave me but to share an amazing story that goes with it because you can't deny what you
can see people say okay well the Coffee Bean but then they see that this thing happened in this biggest partt of people's Biggest fear Ed that they tell me is going to prison that's like everybody's biggest fear in the world and I know I not only went in there I didn't just survive I thrived inside of a Maximum Security Prison but the real magic isn't just the Coffee Bean by itself it was the spiritual awakening that had to happen to make the Coffee Bean into what it is today because inside that prison I grew more
over the next s years and three months spiritually that I ever did Anywhere else in my life imagine that man you go into a dungeon and you become the best versin of yourself like a cocoon like a caterpillar goes in and comes out of butterfly this is what happened to me inside that prison I had a spiritual awakening and I truly believe that that to for us like you said to meet the best version of yourself on the other side of the adversity this has to be a spiritual thing you can't do this by Your
it has to be a spiritual thing that's what I believe now and I'm not and I'm not saying it's a religious thing you can believe whatever religion you want I'm like you I listen to your stuff and you do a great job of dealing the fact that you're a Christian I'm a Christian I'm not telling anybody they have to be a Christian to pursue this but find whatever it is you feel like is your higher power and go after that and let that higher power surrender to the Higher power and this is the spiritual part
that happened when I got into a program recovery inside that prison I wouldn't be here without the program recovery we're going to talk about that I want to I want to stay on this because what you just said is like bro this was just supposed to happen right now it's supposed to happen on this day yeah and I'm so grateful that it's happening but I want to go I want man I'm so excited for everyone Listening to this right now just because I love the I love my family that's the audience of can I say
I love your energy level dude and I figured man like I'm like I'm going into this thing and and I Tred to re prison helps you read people man I can read rooms right because I had to do it to survive but I I've I followed you and listened to you and watch I watch your stories Instagram all that and you seem like the kind of guy that matches the energy of the people in You're the room with and that's exactly you didn't I mean you lived up to it man like this is great but
it's real like you're firing me up and it inspires me right and like I'm thinking about the metaphor like ironically probably that worst day of your life 13 years ago I think the Lord was like Hey I'm going to pluck you out of society bro cuz you're going to die exactly the term I use is he really okay I want you I want you to speak to it and then the other thing is Like you literally physically got beaten down and life is beating people down metaphorically often times in life you literally went in it
took physical beatings forever do you feel like that's part of what had to happen for you Ed it's crazy and and y'all listen when we didn't have we didn't rehearse this or anything man but you said pluck I use that term all the time when I'm speaking to people that I feel like God what I believe is God I'm a Christian so that's When I talk about God that's what I'm saying so I believe that God sent Angels down to me that were in the form of SWAT team in Dallas this Dallas SWAT team those
are my saviors man they plucked me out of a world that I wasn't going to get out of man I mean I wasn't I wasn't leaving the Uptown burglary crime spree alive or a version of myself that was worth living right I truly believe God sent his angels down in their armed they look like they're just in the massive Body armor and everything there's guns in my faces they're scream don't move don't move and I mean it's chaos I didn't see it like that at the time but Ed July 30th 2008 when that SWAT team
came to get me they didn't arrest me that day they rescued me that day brother I got rescued by a SWAT team that God sent down and said hey you know what you're not living up to what what I what I need you to be doing or I've got a plan for you I've got a plan for you And let me put you on this path because I got to break you down first to make you that person because I tell people all the time Ed man God doesn't set bushes on fire anymore he says
people on fire man you know that's I'm just like I get to be one of those people but everybody gets to be one of those people if they choose to be but that's a spiritual awakening that you have to have brother I think there's the the SWAT teams of Life are coming All the time for people and if they'd see them for what they really are that'd be true sometimes that SWAT team is you just had a bankruptcy you you just lost your job it's the SWAT team come on to rescue you you know you
just had a relationship end you know you're struggling as an entrepreneur you got a bunch of adversity someone just quit on you just lost a big account that could literally be the SWAT team for you and when you're listening to shows like this When you get inspired by these stories you need to think about how it applies to your own life that's what moves you it's not just Damon's story it's how it applies for you the different how it transcends just the story but the principles right but I want to sort of start in football
because I think that's where some of the the defining moments of your life started to happen so take my audience through your football career a little bit and then what took place For you and what you were learning who you were at that time those kinds of things so just like a lot of kids that was my dream to be a professional athlete since I was a little kid I had two older brothers so I had really no choice you know they made me be that and so um blessed enough high school went to Baylor
um then I went to the NFL but I was supposed to be drafted in the fourth round I didn't get the call so I think that was like my first like shot at like Not feeling like I was enough so you're sitting there on draft day with your family second day probably thinking I'm going to get a call and it happens never happen and of course my mom's like you're okay and I'm like I'm okay when I'm not okay you weren't okay yeah exactly so that's your first bout of I may not be enough yep
my first time of when I look back in my uh story my journey that's the first time I really felt like that uh got a call from MCO Coaches for the charges now but he was with the Vikings and he kind of was my adviser to where to go as a free agent okay so he told me to go with Coach dunie cuz he's like coach duni I know him as a man he's going to give you a fair shake so I went to the Indianapolis Colts and uh they a pretty good quarterback yeah yeah
it was pretty it was payon Manning yeah he's pretty good he's pretty good you know he's all right you know Reggie Wayne Marvin Harrison so And that's the year after they won the Super Bowl oh wow so it was great to be in that environment okay so everybody needs to know he's a wide receiver and Reggie Wayne and Marvin Harrison one's a Hall of Famer one's going to be a Hall of Famer so you in pretty good company and with one of the greatest quarterbacks of all time exactly I mean it's the it's a dream
come true you know I had to like pitch myself and not freak out when I first seen these guys right I'm sure so um I had a great preseason probably the best in the NFL that year definitely out of rookies um but even out of uh just all the players I think maybe top receiver in the NFL during the preseason of course you know the main guys aren't playing all the games you know so getting more snaps and so I was for sure like I was going to make the team you know I'm I'm doing
good on special teams I'm like good I'm going to make the team get a call in on of course The cut day yeah and I get cut whoa and so that's another shot in my confidence and feeling like I'm not enough right I'm like man I did the best I can do I performed great Reggie told me something I don't know if he remembers this but he said about this leag you have to understand something it's about timeing it's about opportunity so you can play your best pre season and get cut you could play an
average season and make the team M and so I got cut uh but I Made the practice squad so I was cool with that I got an apartment I bought myself a truck which I shouldn't have did but I did it right that was like my promise to myself like I'm going to get the truck right uh bought myself a truck and within two week within a week I get a call from a 317 number and that's Indianapolis I'm at the bank actually Caster my first like put my first check in there it's like hey
uh Trent where you at and I was like you know I'm at The bank and it's like well come in to the office and bring your stuff so at that point I didn't know what that meant I was like okay you know I don't know what what what that means so I come in there bring my stuff and they said we got to release you oh no oh my gosh after I got my apartment I got my car so I have to drive from Indie to Texas which is a long drive after you get fired
home exactly home yeah and uh I'm depressed man I'm there for two weeks I Get a call back from Indianapolis they called and bring me back bring you back then weeks later I get cut emotional roller coaster roller coaster and that was my whole career just to be honest with you with Seattle was the same thing I mean I tell this story a lot I I remember being in Dallas and I get a call from Seattle in my second year I was with the Seahawks and they say Trent we want to bring you back and
I was like hey well can I come tomorrow because it Was an off day and they said no you need to come now because I drive from Dallas to Fort Worth pack my stuff and it's like just come now bring a bag go to airport so I rush home of course like what most people do I call my parents I get on Facebook and I'm like hey I'm going back to Seattle you know God is really working in my life M soon as I get to the airport the phone rings oh my gosh 206 number
like hello he's like have you left yet and I was like no I Haven't left good because we basically changed our mind oh my God and at that point that's when Depression hit that's when I felt I questioned God I question my faith even me talking to God why would you bring me this far yeah just to fail me yeah and honestly I didn't really care about living not saying that I want to actually grab a gun and shoot myself but I didn't care about life life anymore wa there was only one reason that kept
me living that was my son it Was your son it was my son he was born in 2008 in that process and that whole process kept going and was that Tristan that was Tristan that was Tristan man and uh it was hard man so obviously one of the lower points in your life right what did you so you said you focused on Tristan a little bit is that what some of the recommendations you would give to other people that when they're down on something is to find something even outside of yourself or what would Something
bigger than you something bigger than you something that's bigger than you because I just feel like you're living for yourself right if it's all about you I tell people this all the time if it's all about you more than likely you're going to quit but when you have something that's bigger than you you know a lot of people say your why your reason you know what's the reason why you wake up every single day yes you're not going to give up because you Know you're giving up on them wow that you know I believe that
because your story although it's sports related I think people would be surprised that confidence is even fragile at the highest levels right I mean that's guy most people would look at you and go okay unbelievable college football player gets a chance play professionally with some of the best players one thing he doesn't lack is confidence and that's one thing everybody should know I lack Confidence all the time my confidence is fragile man like you get a couple rejections couple setbacks I have to go through all those habits and rituals myself but it's interesting to me
because your story even though it's football isn't that dissimilar for most people listen to this yeah most people have had their hopes up whether it's a relationship or a business it looks like it's going then it's not then you get down then you pick yourself back up it Looks like it's going and it's then it's not and I think some people think man I've picked myself up so many many times right do I have that in me again to pick myself up off the floor yet again what would you say to them about that you
do have it and there's always a greater purpose than your pain that you're going through I think that we focus on the present moment and we kind of say my life is over because something is over just because that relationship is over Just because that job is over doesn't mean your life is over and I'm like a living test I mean so many your story I'm sure is a Living testament to it when you just can tell yourself you know I don't know you know what that something else is yes but there's something more to
my life and that's what I held on to and I didn't know it would be this sure but I just knew I couldn't afford to keep my life in that place of paint it's amazing cuz we you Know I talking off camera it's like often times this is hokey it's a meme your test can become your testimony everything's happening for me and not to me but these are truths right it's always true in hindsight like the fact of the matter is maybe you'd played three or four years in the NFL had a okay halfway decent
career saved a couple hundred grand and went into selling you know more somewhere or Insurance somewhere you would have never Reached the millions of people that you've reached you wouldn't be sitting here right now guarantee 100% I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my struggle it wasn't for me losing my everything right I wouldn't be here it's amazing the other thing people can relate to too is like their first big dream didn't happen yeah I do too like I everyone in your family thought you going to be a football player everybody had your back
on that everyone and then so it's when You sometimes when our Dream fails or relationship fails we haven't just let ourselves down we've let down people all around us and that impacts people too right so you said you focused on Tristan yeah what took place then so the career ends yeah you've got a son which we'll talk about in a minute a little bit about the family life because you all that follow if you don't follow Trent stuff you're going to see this is one of the most vulnerable thoughtful positive People on all of social
media that's why his following is so big and but he doesn't ever try to come across like he's got it all figured out all the time that's what I love about you because neither do I why people say man I'm you get so excited with your guests here I'm like these guests are here for me right like from them I'm a I I I got something to bring to the table I know I do but I've learned so much from the people that are my guests including you on and Off camera so you go through
that time and I know what it's like to have a career like that end as well I wasn't as good as you were at my sport but I understand that so you you're focused on your son what then happened after your career right so I remember being in my mom's room and it wasn't a magical moment like I wish I could paint this story to tell you that it was some magical moment that led me there but I remember being in my mom's uh in my room At my mom's house and I remember just looking
around my room and seeing like all my football accomplishments I seen pictures of Tristan and I broke down and started crying like literally like it wasn't some crazy thing that led me to that yeah and at that moment and I still live by this these words I said it all starts with you m I said you can either sink or you can swim you can have this be the end of your life or the beginning to Something better beautiful and said and I came up with these words I started it's rehab time I never want
to be a speaker this is my biggest fear and we can get into that this is my biggest fear you asked my parents they tell you I'm the most introverted kid that they have me too I'm introvert by Nature people I I don't know yeah you know I don't know how that works but I'm an introvert and I had no idea of social media following any of that I literally Just said it's rehab time and rehab for me meant putting a strength back into a weakness if we're all honest yeah we have something in our
life that we can rehab yes something that we can get better and so for me it meant going to the gym at 12:00 at night and this was 2008 I had one more triy with the Redskins and it's funny how I feel like God can use something to get you out of your funk even though that's not the it that he wants for your life and so I ran A 43 I got signed with the Redskins and I'm living this rehab time journey I get cut but I was good then yeah you're okay this time
I I was okay it was different than like I just knew that there was something more wow to my life Wow second situation that really happened um that happened to me that really woke me up was my college roommate committing suicide one of my best friends and when that happened I went to to his service and I realized that life isn't promised And I realized like this is my boy that was going through struggles that silent battles that I didn't know about yes I felt like I wasn't there for him so much guilt I promised
him I said aun I'm going to make you more alive in my life than you ever been man and that's why I do what I do today so you found this gigantic purpose that was bigger than your fear of speaking or your introverted nature B way bigger than that and he's more alive in my life than He's ever been you know he's alive right now exactly we're talking about him see it's funny thing is that we've all lost people in our lives and I always tell people I said you should honor them with who you
become right and that's really what you've done for him there's so many lessons we've only like about 11 minutes into this or eight minutes into it but I want to go back I want everyone to understand this that even at the top level in sports and business and Entertainment you're going to find that we all have a chance we can all lose our confidence we can all get down we've all struggled with false start after false start getting our hopes up and being slammed back down I love your point of finding a purpose bigger than
you I absolutely love that and then also honoring the people in your life who maybe have transitioned out of it like like he has so as you guys know about 2 years ago I started on this journey to Learning Spanish and I've gotten pretty good I was just on a trip to Mexico and got quite a few compliments on my Spanish game and the reason I've got pretty good is Babel so for you in 20124 maybe getting a little bit better every day would be great for you especially at learning a second language or a
third or fourth or fifth when you're learning a new language with Babel it's exactly what you're doing you're getting better they can help you start speaking a new Language in like 3 weeks imagine what you could do in a year with Babel dive into these lessons they're crafted by over 200 language experts they're 10 minutes long they're easy so whether you're learning Spanish or French or any of Babel's 14 languages you'll be ready for a real world conversation in no time so don't let this chance slip by here's a special limited time deal for our
listeners right now get up to 60% off your Babel subscription but only for our Listeners at babel.com myet get up to 60% off at babel.com myet spelled babbel.com myet rules and restrictions May apply please visit babel.com for details so let's go to the story first then we'll get tactical cuz it's just a banana story yeah but you used to have a very large following on social media that I don't know I'd see you with champagne bottles and and jets and I don't know you have nine exotic cars or something like that so take us back
to About that time in your life what you were doing then yeah definitely so I was about 27 28 years old I just moved to Los Angeles I sold my recent company for not a lot of money but I was living outside of my means I was spending money way faster than I was bringing it in but on social media I was just making it seem like I was printing money and I had this big baller extravagant lifestyle and so you know every about four nights a week or so we were in the club popping
Bottles $5,000 bar tabs nine exotic cars house in the Hollywood Hills with four stories sort of that whole Hollywood Bach lifestyle that you could imagine and that was that's s on social right so you had the Jet Set life brand was the brand at the time and it was growing but I remember watching it thinking I wonder if this is real yeah you know I remember thinking that and I was wondering the same thing I just it's a little bit surreal For me to now meet this I'd consider to be this man who creates the
most spiritual and moral content that grabs your heart compared to what I used to watch it's just such a stunning turnaround but if we went back to those times yeah I think a lot of people can relate to this you all sort of have someone on social media maybe they're following that fits this description right or you know someone like that what was the pressures like for you to be Probably I assume you're spending money you don't have at the time were you thinking man this is eventually going to catch up or I'm going to
were you worried you were going to kind of get I don't know exposed or run out of money what were you thinking oh yeah for sure I mean the thing is is that you have to constantly be upping it to take it to the next level right so today if I'm to buy a Mercedes then tomorrow that needs to be a Ferrari and then it needs to Keep leveling up as you go and so what I started at was just traveling the world you know living pretty well and then I was like how do I
take it to the next level how do I take it to the next level and so I constantly felt this pressure to outdo myself and I almost felt like the followers expected it I needed to do it for them and so I created this alter ego that it was just became like an unsustainable lifestyle very very quickly but I didn't know where that Would end I didn't know how to stop that and so it became pretty clear that at some point I wasn't going to be able to sustain it and I ended up going dark
on social media and creating and deleting all my content for four years this is a remarkable part of the story coming up you guys I'm before we go to the dark place where you went you went off for a while I think a a lot of people want that life you were showing right and the bottles the club all especially my Younger listeners I'm curious were you happy then you know I was living for the moment and so anytime you're living for the moment like you feel happy right then and there but then you go
to sleep at night not really loving the person that you are and it's this emptiness that you feel like I was chasing short-term instantaneous pleasure so it feels great for that second but you can't help but feel this hollowing feeling that's growing inside of you It's like an addiction just like anything else where the the cause of the addiction and the solution are sort of the same thing where in order to feel that void that I was feeling I felt like I needed more of that I needed another hit I needed to show another exotic
car I needed to show another you know night out at the club popping bottles and then so I would go do that I'd feel good for the second but then that next day I would just have this really empty Feeling and I would start all over again yeah I'm wondering if uh such a good description too I'm wondering if when you need that shortterm pleasure that you're seeking right then you also start to kind of Chas short-term quick money also true to phip that void was that happening with you too oh yeah however you can
make the quickest Buck possible it's all part of that short-term thinking mentality that you know was the reason that I wasn't able to sort of Unlock my full potential and being able to from that shortterm thinking to that longterm thinking was really pivotal in helping me find sucess and now sort of build something way more sustainable and Lasting and more impactful too what about the people around you during those days it's just like the podcast I was listening to by you just a few minutes ago I was surrounding myself by people that wanted to be
a part of that flashy lifestyle And so naturally I was attracting people to me that wanted to be there because of what I could offer because of the flash because of the cars because of the houses not because I'm a nice guy or I'm a good person and it's not their fault I didn't realize that at the time I was blaming everybody around me as to why I failed and why I went through so much hardship but then I I got to a point in my life you know was around 30 years old where I
realized that it's my fault that I'm attracting all these people into my life because that's what I'm putting out there that was the magnet that I was putting out into the world so naturally I was bringing in all these people that wanted to sort of use me for something or didn't really love me for who I was so profound because when you do that everybody when you do lead with your stuff right or your achievements you are the one who's put that barrier up between you and other people to get To know the real you
the barrier are those things all the you know happens to me often at the different clubs I belong to or the golf courses where I'll meet a really rich dude you know and his all his life is within the first minute he's got to tell me what jet he's got and how many Ferraris and I tell him what jet you got I try I try to just listen and I often I catch myself telling guys sometimes later I'm like you know um I like you yeah you didn't need to give me All that you know
I I really like the you I'm curious about and I by the way I really appreciate your transparency and your honesty about it too because whether you know it or not what you've already said is helping people go you know maybe this is fleeting maybe what I'm leading with is hollow not not that we don't want you to have a jet and a car and a beautiful home and great friends we want you to have those things but what what did happen that I want to Touch on next is cuz most people can relate to
this my first Dream ended yeah we were talking about this off camera which was baseball right and that dream ended and I was left with okay what am I going to do next and that has happened to almost everybody listening or watching this their first Dream their business their first career their first Dream relationship it ended and then you're left to pick pieces up and remake their lives the reason I Admire you so much is you did it right most people when that first Dream fails they get knocked down a lot of people stay there
and really in your case you were just kind of staggered you didn't actually I we'll get to the part where you turned it around but what was it like as things started to unravel and what did that feel like what was the process like what oh my God it was this massive Dark Cloud that was just hanging over my head and my biggest fear was Just any minute I'm going to get exp exposed and people who are going to find out that I wasn't really this baller guy who could maintain this lifestyle so I definitely
got to the point of just feeling like massive depression and I was trying to sustain that lifestyle at least just optically showing that I was still that guy but I wasn't financially able to do so anymore and also the person that I was was evolving I started feeling a disconnect between my public Persona and who I was deep in side and so you know I would say i' I've experienced you know different levels of failure throughout my life um but that was like the first time in my life that I had experienced massive depression like
to the point where I literally felt like I was going to develop diabetes I thought I was going to get different health conditions I'd wake up in the middle of the night like with my sheets soaked in sweat because I was going Through so much anxiety every single morning all I would do was walk around my block for hours because I couldn't sit still I had to just keep moving and you know I also lost a lot of my friends at that time so I didn't have a lot of people that I could talk to
I mean talk about like the darkest darkest days of your life that's what I was going through at that point my gosh and you actually got down to so he has these nine exotic cars the house you're down No house one car's gone two cars gone seven cars are gone nine cars are gone there's 50 Grand in savings 20 grand in savings six grand in savings you get down to like 600 bucks $600 but in reality I was way in the red because I owed so many people money I like I had credit card debt
I had all kinds of debt but $600 is sort of what I had in my checkings account unbelievable so so I was far I was deep underwater but that was how much money I Left if you saw his content guys to think that this man was owing the world money right and and uh I just think it's one of the greatest stories I could possibly put on my show for people to see hey you can do it one way and you make it but if you do it the right way the second time it's longlasting
it makes an impact and that's what you're doing now the thing you did though that I admire is that as you were falling you were still swinging right and that's a Critical thing as you're falling and the life's knocking you and you're staggered you still have to punch back to some extent absolutely so you go to this there becomes this moment and I get he's part of a traditional Indian family you're about to move back in with Mom and Dad I'm sure your parents are like what the heck right so then there's the family everyone
listening this can relate to pieces of it the family being disappointed in you the friends Disappearing the the stress and the sweating at night and all the anxiety and you're at this dinner yeah and what happens at this dinner yeah so I'm looking for any way to just avoid moving in with my parents that was like my only goal at that time which is incredible how can I pay rent that was my only goal in life at that point in time and how old were you then 30 years old the hard part is that you
know everybody has a vision for their life and I certainly Didn't imagine being 30 years old on the verge of moving in my parents with only $600 in my bank account right and Dad legal issues there's all kinds of stuff going on everything you could have everything you could imagine was going wrong for me and so that certainly wasn't the vision of my life you know celebrating my 30th birthday not even able to afford the drinks I'm buying at the bar yeah it was so embarrassing and so you know at that time I was just
like I am looking for any opportunity any sort of Lifeline that I could find that could take me out of this situation and that's the thing is like you know for opportunity it's all about the right mindset right because there's opportunities that are around us all of the time but if you're not open-minded and looking for those opportunities you could easily miss it and that day that we're talking about could have easily been a day that that opportunity just Breeed right by me so I'm at this dinner and this makeup artist I know nothing about
makeup right and this makeup artist is telling me how she's traveling all over the world she's teaching these makeup seminars girls are paying $3 and $400 a pop and they're selling out so she's this International teacher and I just asked a simple question I said have you thought about taking that concept online and she responds and she goes actually that's a great idea and I I Literally don't even think I thought about it the words just came out of my as if it wasal pulling it out of me and I was like I can do
it and here I am a guy that knows nothing about makeup has never built a website that knows nothing about online education or anything like that and she looks at me and she goes okay oh my gosh and so I'm like all right online classes thank God it's digital content which doesn't it's not like I have to go Through product development and you know spend thousands of dollars or tens of thousands of dollars to develop prototypes and these things so I'm like all right she obviously had no idea how little money I had and how
little expertise I had I was far over my head but I was desperate and Desperation is the mother of all invention right so I take that $600 and I say okay I need to get what do I need I want to Best Buy and first thing I got was softbox lights The cheapest you could buy with a webcam $400 gone I got $200 left to my name then I'm like I need a website so I go on Craigslist and I put out an ad that hey I need a builder online school for 200 bucks I
got you know probably 100 emails 99 of them told me that I'm crazy go to hell no one's ever going to do that and for some reason I got this one guy that said you know what that's really really low I'll do it for 200 bucks but if it works out just kick me a Little bit of money you know extra afterwards and I was like thank God I launched the website we recorded our first class she had a big social media following she blasted out this class to her followers and then boom just just
overnight you know we started getting a lot of sales in and and to this day then that turned into the box that you all have to right so give us an idea what's that turned into now yeah so it started with online content and then I started Just working with different makeup artists to teach online classes and then one of the models for one of the classes I was in turned out to be my now fiance and baby mama who also you know had an extensive makeup experience so as we built a relationship I was
telling her I had a greater Vision than just doing online classes and so by adding her to the mix she helped me come up with how to develop our own line of cosmetics and so it started as a $600 investment all The money that I had in the time is now a mid 8 fig Revenue company that we reached within a couple years we just hired our 100 team member and so life is sort of just completely turned around all in the past few years guys come on are you listening or watching this right now
it's remarkable what are the lessons let's let's let's unpack that just for a second number one in the darkest moments of your life you are one conversation one question one meeting away from Turning it around if you still have that reticular activating system see his Ras and his brain was programmed still to see opportunity not to see all these anxieties and worries you were still looking for some way out when there was almost no light left exactly second thing is he was willing to step into a space he was Ill prepared for and figured I'll
figure it out when I get there too many people preparation is important but too many people are Waiting on some threshold of preparation like I got to be completely ready Champions step into spaces they're not ready for and they figure it out when they get there and then third you kept swinging I I I admire so much now during that time this is where it gets good guys now we're going to take some note taking it's one of the it's one of my favorite stories bro because it's one of my favorite stories because of the
man that you became in the process so Everything in our life is happening for us and not to us if we choose to see it that way thank God this happened for you can you imagine if you exactly thank God but can you imagine telling me that at that time I'm sweating in my sheets and add my let shows up and say this is a good thing for you right thank God this I be like get out of my house what are you talking about you can't see it in your darkest moment but what's crazy
is and we'll get to this in a second is now I create motivational content that connects with people and the thing is I had to go through all that suffering and pain in order to understand what it feels like to go through so much suffering and pain so I can connect with my audience and say I have been there I have experienced exactly what you've experienced and I know how to translate that emotion into online content it's remarkable guys he goes It goes dark for four years or so so you're losing Followers like crazy anybody
on social media knows what it's like to lose one follow go so stressful never mind all that and that's just like you're gone people kind of forgot about you you know in social media world four years is 4,000 years right and what I think you did and this is where we're going to get into content creation so all of you that have three followers to 30 million followers that listen to my stuff we're going to start to unpack how can you Begin to grow in some of the ways like you've grown which by the way
you're the fastest growing person on social media right now I think that's arguably the case I mean I don't think anybody in one year is at 4 billion views and adding 2 million followers a month that's just remarkable I think you went from making motivational content playing on people's motives right to creating inspirational content which is to put people in spirit that's the Distin yeah you say that again true it's true well I do I think it went from motivational to inspirational that's a subtle shift where you're playing the motives of sort of greed and
excess and all that which some of those things are fine to inspirational which is in spirit so what are some of the damn keys to What You've Done Right like in your case what's what's worked and why is it working AB yeah absolutely so when I started creating content I was dark on Social media for 4 years and I just want to make this point really quick a lot of people feel like if you're ever staying still then you'll get run over you're dead in the water but I just want to say to those people
that feel like they are somewhat stagnant sometimes it's okay to go dark for a period of time while you're figuring out who you are sometimes it takes being dark to see the light and it took me those four years of of stopping not doing anything really Trying to become the person that I needed to be to succeed in order to get to the point of creating this inspirational content so what happened was I started you know feeling like I I was running this Cosmetics I still running this Cosmetics business it's going extremely well you know
I run with my fiance it's going amazing and I'm like I still have this deeper calling for something I want to go back to inspiring people connecting with people And so in the beginning I started going in front of the camera and I would just talk and try to motivate them through my words and what I realized is I'm not very good at that for whatever reason I'm okay maybe telling my personal story and so I put out my very first video in 2018 on my birthday on May 29th 2018 and it was just me
telling a story about how you shouldn't give up um and so I posted that video thinking that oh this video is going to go viral I was super excited About it um posted it on my birthday and then I kept refreshing and refreshing and refreshing and it was like views 105 views 110 views I think that video didn't even break 150 views or something like that but I was at that point in my life where I understood that things take time to take off and I was smart enough to know that you know what if
my first strategy doesn't work it's okay I need to keep evolving and trying new things to ultimately get to what I needed to Get to so then I started telling stories on camera and what I did is I hired an animator you know someone that was like $500 a cartoon or something like that I still wasn't spending too much money on this um so now when I was telling a story I'd have cartoons showing up on screen okay and then as I started that level of content it sort of took my views from going from
100 views to you know 100 to 500 views so now about 500 to about 5,000 views or something so I Was like I'm on to something here and then as soon as I start to experience some level of success then I start to optimize around that I start to double down and say this is working this is the direction that I need to go how do I double down and go further into this and then I started thinking okay cartoons are great but you know they they're not really relatable for people so what if I
actually had actors that showed on screen whatever lesson I'm talking about Think about this if I was to tell you oh I walked past um you know a homeless person or let's say this let me tell you about the key to happiness is gratitude here's the three different lessons about gratitude that you need to know yeah that's interesting right or if I was to tell you that hey I was walking home from the grocery store and as I was walking home it started raining on my head and all I could think about is how miserable
is this I got to walk home in The rain and as I'm thinking that I look over and I see a homeless person who's living in the rain and that taught me me about gratitude right which one are you going to remember that story about that homeless person right and so I started getting into storytelling and then I hired actors who would actually create these life lessons that we're talking about and I would just be a small piece at the end who would just talk about the lesson that's the key takeaway from Whatever story that's
being seen on screen and as soon as I started making that shift that's when I started to see my views really start picking but it wasn't just like instantly I started going viral or anything I still struggled with failure for quite some time with that strategy until I finally got a video that went viral there's a couple things you said there that are so profound number one you're kind of your the market will tell you whether your Content's working abut right so if you're constantly posting the same sort of thing and it's not getting a
response it's telling you that people aren't responding to that number one number two is storytelling which is huge now not everybody out there can afford to hire actors right but if you begin to create pieces of content once or twice a week where it's exactly what you just said it's just you telling a story that's happened from your life so important you Say that because often times people will tell me why would anybody want to see my content I'm not successful yet because you have stories right so your your story of sitting in the grocery
line at the store and something interesting happened can be something that moves people right you at the bank you and also documenting stories that happen for you as well telling stories and just documenting things you do are more interesting than you think they are look At reality television today everybody you know the real housewives of these different shows we have many friends on those shows that are our dearest friends not all of these people some of them are but not all these people are Mega rich people it's just the documentation of their existence let me
ask you a third element of it that I see emotion oh sorry just one last aspect in the beginning I wasn't spending money either I was having my fiance's Brother I was shooting on my iPhone literally can do it bootstrap with no resources really glad no super glad that you've interjected that like said that's huge too and by the way some of the funniest stuff online look at Tik Tok yeah Tik Tok that platform is Everyday People kind of acting and lipsyncing and doing stuff like that so you don't have to have actors all the
time also though I've heard you talk about this before emotion's important absolutely how so What do you mean by that so the number one comment that I look for is this video made me cry if you could make somebody feel something then they'll always remember that story because of the emotion that they felt so my goal is always to emotionally move people and all know that I'm on to a big idea because as I'm writing the idea I'll literally start to get teed just reading the idea that I'm writing or have you ever posted something
on Instagram and Something that was very heartfelt and as you're reading your caption you're almost emot Ally moved or it's taking you to a certain place and then that ends up being like your most viral post or your best performing post if you can extract that emotion and put that into your content then your audience will feel that emotion and that was one thing I realized is cuz I'm not a filmmaker I didn't go to school for this I had no background in creating film or anything Like that but when I'm looking at a screen
I'm like what moves you emotionally once you start to see actors get all teed and their their eyes get red and tears are flowing that naturally makes you start to feel emotional as well and so if you can move people emotionally then they're more likely to tell people about that video they're more likely to hit that share button they're more likely to say hey did you see this video oh my God I can't stop Crying you have to watch this what what creates crying so is there are there certain elements is it our existence on
Earth our dreams our families our faith are there certain I don't want to call them buttons but points that you feel like are more likely to induce emotion relatability that's what I've come to realize I I get this so often that oh my God this video reminded me of my dad and I miss my dad so much I wish he was here Or this video reminded me of my unappreciative ex-husband thank God I don't have that guy in my life and I'm no longer in that state so if you can get them to relate to
a part of their own life that they've experienced even indirectly then you can help drive that emotion because they can remember something that they've experienced and it could even be something that happened during their childhood it could be something that they saw it could be Something that they heard but if you can recreate that experience for them that's what will move them emotionally brother so good you have a there is so many videos that I I think do that and I want everybody listening to this break it down to where you are you can be
telling stories your way you can be creating emotional you can be talking about your dad you can be talking about your children your experience so you need to be thinking in your way you know a lot Of us just keep posting that Meme exactly keep writing the caption keep you know just a picture of us and our kids start to think about how you could tell a story in your caption as well or through the video you have this one video I just saw today that struck me and this is what I want people just
get an angle that you did that was brilliant cuz there's all different ways to look at a perspective but it was the one where and it seems like a simple one it Was the one where the man's checking out girls on his social media do you know the one I'm talking about I've got a few of those yeah okay well this particular one that I saw today and what it was guys is just the the the pain that it caused for this woman W sitting there while her husband's screening in on looking at the stuff
the power of it wasn't him looking for me the power of it was her face exactly you showing her face and how much it crushed her exactly To see her man doing that and so it's just a way of what you really did is you changed the wall instead of it just being him you changed the wall and showed her ex so these are little things you guys begin to think about is not every video needs to be shot straight on your face change the wall change the view show someone else show the background show
something right do you do that perspectives yeah I literally can tell I can tell I can use the same Story or the same Dynamic but tell it from three different perspectives and they're all really unique so I could show the husband's perspective about a wife who doesn't believe in him that he's going to succeed in his business and the stress it creates on him and then I can take that same story and show the wife's perspective about how insecure he makes her feel because he's checking out other girls or he's constantly disengaged in meaningful Conversation
okay um so I'm constantly switching the perspective I'll tell a story from a maid's perspective a janitor's perspective a CEO's perspective and everybody can relate to some aspect or some character and the Reon one of the big reasons too that you know my storytelling using actors is so powerful is if I'm going to sit here look on camera certain people as soon as they see my face are instantly going to turn Out tune now they're going to just say I don't like his hair I don't like you know watching this you know this guy I
don't like the way he looks I don't like the way he dresses or whatever but with my actors I can show every kind of person every kind of occupation every gender every age every demographic something that someone is going to connect with and say I have been in that person shoes and I know what that feels like is there a site you'd recommend I Didn't know I was going to ask you this for b-roll if someone can't afford actors but they want to get content like that are there any sites like that that somebody can
see video blocks video blocks B ckss video blocks okay it's just worth having everybody have access started and I still got really good traction by just using b-roll before we started shooting original content okay let's talk platform for minut let's go back let's pick this big brain of yours Too cuz you're sort of omnipresent if I'm I'm an average person I've got kind of a business that I'm promoting and trying to brand and myself as well do you recommend I'm on Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube all of the above or should I pick one and try
to dominate it what's your advice on that yeah definitely so first figure out what comes native to you like if you're a person that's just not good at video but you're really good at writing then Twitter might be the platform for you but if you're really good at taking awesome photos but you're not comfortable with video then Pinterest or Instagram is going to be the platform for you for me I knew right away that I wanted to be the number one most viewed content creator in the world if I was going to create that much
of an impact on people's lives so I decided to start with the biggest social platform in the world which is Facebook Facebook is so Underrated I cannot emphasize enough how people underestimate Facebook there's this perception out there that my grandma's on Facebook so I'm not going to be on there there is one key ingredient that Facebook has that makes it such a powerful platform to conquer the share button that's what it is that's what it all comes down to because if you can create some piece of content and you see this all the time where
someone didn't even intend for something To go viral they just happen to take a photo of their kid or they showed like a little video of themself like unboxing a gift or something and the next thing you know they're on the Ellen show that's that happens on Facebook so often because if enough people are clicking that share button then Facebook picks it up in the algorithm and then it creates this Snowball Effect so I would say if your goal is to get as much traction as possible I would start with Facebook That's the way I
was growing the fastest because there's not a lot of content creators on Facebook because people don't take it serious and then also it's got the most amount of people and it's got that secret weapon which is a share button so I want everyone to hear this you're in a relationship with everyone else they're in a relationship with so that can be their friends that can be their parents that can be their siblings that's also true in business as well you Get into business with another company you're in business with who they're in business with so
do you think that's at least something someone should be evaluating when they meet somebody or should you just be judging me on who I am and it's unfair for you to I mean a lot of people listening to this right now or watching this are kind of nodding like you know one of the real hardships of my relationship is their family or is their Other other friendships should that be evaluated in a way look it's not the fault of our partner that they have a crazy mother or a difficult brother or a we all have
colorful characters in our family somewhere right difficult people whatever I think the most important thing that has to happen there is we have to be able to trust that our partner is a good mediator of those two worlds that Ultimately I am having a relationship with their family but I'm the one that's affecting me the most is my relationship with my partner so what's what affects me the most is my partner's the way my partner filters their family through them before they get to me or when their family does something very difficult how does my
partner deal with it are they is my partner constantly bullied by their family is their partner Con is my partner constantly emotionally manipulated by their family because if it's I'm with someone and they say my mom's making me feel bad again because of this and that and I've got to go I've got to go and we're like this person's mother is a nightmare or this person's father or this this is I can't bear this person often what we're saying is I can't bear what this person is the control and influence this person ex exerting over
my partner which then Directly impacts me so I think that in a way we don't have to trust our partner's family we have to trust that our partner is actually the one in control wonderful wonderful and has our back makes the relationship a priority yes not trying to pull you from your family yes I want you I I respect what's going on with your family but you also have to be the protector of our wonderful time our love our Dynamic and if you're being constantly impacted in terribly negative Ways that then come into our home
and that then does become part of our world see I feel like there's two people listening to say there's the single person who's getting all these nuggets then there's the person in a relationship listening to this this is is almost one of the things you've listened to this or watched it you should then go back and listen to and watch this with your partner because what a wonderful answer and along that Have your back thing I have to ask you this I've been surprised of all the business coaching I done I've done lots of different
questions come my way in business but it always comes back to relationships the number one obstacle or um at least imagined obstacle that the people that I coach whether it's social media my R Syndicate group uh one-on ones that I do is how do I get my partner to support me more in my business they're antagonistic to it They're negative I can't get their support and I I'm really not great at equipping them with an answer on something like that because I think that's just support overall but if someone were asking you in the business
sense how do I get my spouse to become more supportive of me I I'm I'm at a loss of giving somebody a quality answer for that do you have one there's a very if you're with someone who is extremely Negative in general then that's an issue and we have to address our partners negativity hey this I love you mhm but the negativity that's constantly being brought if you've got issues you want to deal with and we deal with them together and we work on them or you have stuff that you struggle with that's great we
can be a team in that but if you're constantly bringing negativity cuz I I I say that on my retreat even to the room I say we've got to be each other's Partners here this week if you're a toxic energy in this room and you're just bringing people down that's not good if you come to this room and you're like I'm feeling depressed or anxious today I I need help that's different okay we can work with that you know so if your partner's just negative that's a problem that needs to be addressed I do think
it's worth asking though why is my partner scared of this what what's behind this there's a motive Here what's behind this and people should consider they should consider that starting a business and going all in on that business is in many cases a highly highly selfish thing to do and the you you shouldn't always ask the people around you to thank you for the most selfish thing you've ever done you're saying why can't you support me in my dream mhm all right well if We're doing that let's find out what her dream is let's find
out what his dream is cuz maybe there's some big thing that if they went Full Tilt on that and suddenly didn't have evenings or weekends and didn't have time and didn't have this maybe you wouldn't be so cozy with it but because it's your thing it seems very very very important and how could they not be supportive so we there there is a kind of narcissism that often people have I Think you're right that uh that pursuing your dream can inherently be a very selfish thing and it doesn't mean you shouldn't do it m but
it does mean that you should recognize ize that because it's your dream it doesn't make it someone else's dream and if it's not your dream then I have to show you that I'm committed to our relationship despite this dream that I'm committed to the time we have together to our love that there's Also a part of this Vision that I am like I I want this to be about what we can create together but you also have to be careful not to [ __ ] people can smell that [ __ ] when it's like yeah
you're saying that CU you want me to feel included but really this is about you it and it also is worth asking the question I want you to support me here because this is really important to me but you also need to tell me where I can support you what's your dream or what's The thing what would you love to be doing because I want this to work for for both of us and I want this relationship to be one that constantly elevates both of us yes to to do things that make us really happy
doesn't have to be Conquering the world yeah but what is it we want to do let me get a list of your things as well and and let's figure that out I I think that's I've never heard someone answer it that way Matthew you know and that's a really I think the Other I want to also emphasize one thing you said is what's behind their fear you know I think sometimes we get so excited about these businesses we've started that they begin to think that that's more important than them that's right and I think also
there's a layer behind there I've always told entrepreneurs this that safety thing you said earlier was so huge and any change you begin to make I think there's potentially a button that goes off in many people that You're leaving me that they can't articulate it they're not sure it doesn't look like it there's nothing you've done that indicates it you're leaving me and then on your side of it I think you have to ask yourself I think it's one of the foundations of every relationship is you can work through all those other issues you've described
I agree but the foundation of a relationship is you have to believe in me do you believe me if I have this Dream do you believe in me that's the one thing I think you have to dig to the depth of but you use the word toxic how do I know forget just the business sense are there how do I know if someone's toxic for me I'm in a relationship with someone who's toxic for me you use that word and I I love that word are there are there ways to just evaluate is you know
is this person toxic for me I think all we one of the easiest ways is is there a Culture of kindness in our relationship or is there a culture of winning because in a culture of winning it's constantly even in an argument winning could be I make my point heard and I'm right but winning can also be I inflict the most damage I say the most hurtful thing that makes you cry and now I got more emotion out of you than you did out of me you know like and I I think I'm I know
for me personally Kindness is like that's the my highest highest value in life is just kindness whether between everyone like I just I sounds so trite but I TR I truly I live by that lens of I just want to be around kind people and there's this insecure 19-year-old version of me that if he met someone he thought was particularly beautiful and attractive or whatever was just oh my God I just want to go on a Date with this person today's me I could go on a date with the hottest person on Earth and if
I found a mean streak in that person I don't want to see him again I just want to be around kind people and I think that too often we value how spicy you are how exciting you are how attractive you are how accomplished you are and none of us are going how kind is my partner because a an unkind person is fine as long as everything's going right but when Something's going wrong or when they feel jealous or when they feel insecure or where they feel threatened or they don't feel like the most important thing
that day or whatever they will [ __ ] you up you know and you have to be so you have to be so aware of that and I think the toxic people when we talk about real toxicity it's someone who really consciously or unconsciously is always putting what they they you know their desires their needs their insecurities Ahead of what is good for the relationship itself so good there's this there's this uh you should see our folks listening to you here their jaw their jaws are open there's a there's a um you're a remarkable man
you're a remarkable man you it's it's your level of humility that allows you to have this depth of insight as You observe people then I'm I'm really so taken back with you I'm I'm getting such great value from this And so uh thank you 90% of the way through they're going to learn how to connect with you in a minute just heard that you know you were um you're talking about where you come from a little bit I just was like thinking about how you got started and just how telling even the first night of
your comedic life is like a pretty big night in your life right so just everyone El doesn't know this this is a guy who's working at IBM most of you most people probably did not know That Jeff Foxworthy worked at IBM right that's what he was doing for a living I think your dad worked there too if I'm not mistaken that's how I got the job I was I had flunked out of college I was working at a grocery store and I think my dad said to one of his buddy give my kid a job
and so it sounds more glammer I I was carrying a tool bag in fixing machines um but but it wasn't singing to me I knew while I was doing it I'm like crap this isn't my parking space this Isn't my lane and I work with a bunch of guys that that would always went to the local comedy club in Atlanta and they go dude you're funnier than those people at the comedy club you should go up down there and I'm like I and so they entered me without my knowledge they entered me in a contest
not an amateur night a contest for comedians for working comedians called the great southeastern laugh off and they came back and they said we entered you in this contest I'm Like oh crap so I went and wrote like five or six minutes of material about my family and I went down and the first night on stage I was so nervous I won the contest a minute and a half into it and I was like this is what I want to do this is what I was made to do this is my gift and and then
I came off and this girl came over to talk to me and I was so nervous I spilled my drink down the front of her sweater and I I mean I made a joke I Said well I guess you're never going to go out with me and she saidwell you didn't even ask me and that girl I've been married to for 37 years that's so I met my wife in my career less than five minutes apart unbelievable same place some night and by the way everyone there's a lesson in that which is he went and
did something he was terrified to do and sometimes on the other side of things we're super afraid of that we feel ill-prepared for is our dream and That's not hope or corny maybe it's even occurring to you right now listening to me say it right like how'd this both happen that night if you don't go do something you're totally terrified to do not completely prepared for you don't get your career which is your dream the platform to influence people like you're doing right now nor potentially this amazing thing you're most proud of which is your
family and it was because you did something you were freaking not Ready to do and afraid to do and on the other side of that was this gift right it's the consequence of say yes I yeah it's it's just going yeah okay I'll do it it doesn't mean you're not scared but but that's all bravery is is being scared and doing it anyway yeah uh you know so and I got over being scared to go on stage but yes it's the consequence of I I I that was how it happened for me at the mission
is the guy looked at me and goes man these guys have never been In a small group of men like to done a small group Bible study would you lead it and I certainly won the most qualified guy to do it but I went yeah okay I'll do it yeah you know there's 5 million people more qualify to me but I'll do it yeah and it was the consequence of saying yes that it ended up being one of the most impactful things in my life and I tell my kids at I said you know what
I want you to do in life I want you to fail I want you to Fail a lot because if you're failing you're pushing the boundaries you're trying to find the boundaries of what you're capable of doing if you never fail you've never pushed that boundary and gone too far over it to win that's not my thing so fail a lot man because then you're pushing it I love that and God doesn't call the qualified he qualifies the called we all probably heard that saying but it's true I've experienced it in my own life all
these Things I wasn't ready to do or prepared for but and people say well how do you step into that space for me I must just say this to everybody I know it's true for you too my business partner is is is God my business partner is Jesus so for me I got a good partner who's got my back all the time so I step into these things with some Measure of Faith not really in myself but in who's got my back and who my partner is and that he'll if I'll step boldly in faith
some Of these answers and thoughts and the words and the whatevers the people the places the relationships sort of appear because I've stepped in faith when you don't step in faith I think often times those people the thoughts the circumstances the meeting the connections don't show up because you've not stepped into that uncomfortable unknown place that's just how I look at it I think you're you're right and you know you've got like this light in You're like a porch light where like moths are attracted to it and so yeah you you know it sounds kind
of corny but but we live in a world now where people they want the likes they want it's it's uh give me the likes give me the likes it's it's most important to get to the point where you go I don't care I don't care I this is what I do you know I know like within what I do I would NE I I I I'm not mean-spirited about it if I hurt your feelings with anything I've ever Said please forgive me I'm sorry that was not the intent so if you don't like me as
a con I don't care I don't care I mean I hope you find somebody that you like cuz laughter is really important you know it's kind of like the release valve that keeps the boiler from exploding yeah um but how do you feel about though Jeff like lately like I uh you know obviously the other night when we're recording this we'll be out pretty soon but this a situation happened with Will Smith and Chris Rock where Chris Rock's making jokes right and you've had this situation this goes to your special it's called the good old
days and he just reflects on some of the things that are funny that are just also beautiful and sometimes better or just different than they are now but then you know you've seen uh whether you agree with the messaging or not but you know Harts had to cancel culture Chappelle's had major issues and those are just a few But how do you feel about because comedy is Art right and so what are your thoughts on this like that's not funny to me so you're a bad dude type stuff it's we have a real hard time
as a society of laughing at ourselves now and and and within that lies the problem because we have to give up our need to be right when you have have to be right then the other has to be wrong and people don't want to engage in any kind of relationship where they have To be wrong all the time and so they just go the other way and as a comic it's kind of our job to just hold things up and go why do we do this why do we do that we're truth tellers why do
we do this why do we do this and when people start attacking that and they don't have the ability to laugh at themselves it means they they think that they've got it all figured out and none of us have it all figured out you've got your lane and you've got a Lot of that figured out and I got my lane and I got a lot of that figured out but there's a lot of other lanes I know nothing about and so every day you and I are both coming to aund Forks in the road and
we're having to go do I go this way or that way and we're all doing the best we can but I don't have to be right there were things that I argued vehemently for when I was 20 that at 60 I go no I've kind of changed my mind on that one me too so totally agree with You I got to tell you something it's interesting that people ask me the older you get you know what have you learned I said honestly one of the things I have learned is how little I know I thought
I knew a lot more at 30 than I know I don't know now at 50 and I'm always concerned when I have a friend who never changes their mind right mind should change more information we should evolve we should mature right it always concerns me when someone never changes Their mind never says I'm sorry oops I made tells me is you haven't researched it at all or you haven't engaged in conversation on it you know AG because I've changed my mind about a million things and if I had any advice I was telling my youngest
daughter this the other day and I love this child so much but you know when she's not the child I want to be with when I have my heart attack you know it's my oldest one who's who's very common there but I told her I Said you want to know what I said baby girl the the biggest thing that I've learned in life the most ful thing that I've learned in life is this and and like I said I'm visual I go let it go let it go and and I literally I mean I know
you guys are listening to me but I'm opening my hand and I go Let it go I used to be the guy when I was 20 and somebody cut me off in traffic I'd be on his bumper and I'd be changing lanes you know yelling at him and screaming and Now it happens and I go Let it go Let it go why do you think we don't you think we're control think we think we control everything you think that's what it is yes yeah and and something like Co shows you you don't have control over
anything you don't have control over where you get this little invisible virus that may or may not kill you you don't have any control over what's going on in Ukraine right now you don't have any control over what's going on sadly in the houses Of Congress right now and you have very little control over things but that doesn't mean it's hopeless it's the the one who spoke the universe into existence has control and if you will rightly take your place in this and go hey I don't have control but I trust you and you do
so and you've given me these gifts so let me quit wasting time being pissed off at dad or let me quit wasting time yelling at the guy in traffic and let me use these these gifts and these Things you know everything if you look around I'm looking at your office here behind you you got a poster on the wall it was cre created for a purpose to promote this book this chair I'm I'm sitting in was created for a purpose so somebody didn't have to stand up so if you do believe in a Creator and
these things these simple things were created with a purpose then what about you and me and it's not my Purpose God what a waste of time what a waste of my lap if I'm gonna be yelling at somebody in traffic or or sitting home wrenching my hands over what's going on in you know I don't what's going on in places I don't have any control over let me deal with what I have control over I have control over being a good dad I have control over being a good husband I have control over being a
good Steward of this gift that I've been given I don't have any control Over what somebody thinks about me I'm letting that go you know and I love you but I'm letting it go thank you brother thank you and speaking of that I want to go right to it if I'm going to get you on the show I want to really help as many people I know and serve as many people as you do and you've gone right to it we're in this time where there's so much uncertainty externally in people's lives you know what's
happening on with the pandemic masks no masks all The political discourse all this stuff this noise this uncertainty and I think there's so much angst and anxiety in our culture right now so many people listening to this are watching it right now what would you say to them that are experiencing those emotions right now what advice would you give them they got to turn off the news I know that sounds overly simplistic but you got to at least turn off a little bit so you can get a breath because Unfortunately today It's hard to turn
it off since it follows you I mean most people have seen the social dilemma they understand that literally you are being trapped in every single thing you speak say do and everything you're going to see and it's different if you type in global warming and you're one person you're get a complete different set of answers than if you type in global person warming and you're another person so we're living in a world where it's hard to find truth And so the first place you got to realize is you can't control out the outside world you
can influence it but we can control the inside world and if you get yourself overwhelmed it's because all this is coming at you you got to slow it down stop it and say now what am I going to create out of this Insanity because that's the great thing that happens and I know it sounds you know optimistic or and I think you know me well enough I'm not one of those Positive thinkers I've never been I believe in intelligence I believe in seeing things as they are but not worse than it is so you don't
try but then you got to see it better than it is or you can't make it better and then you got to go to work and get the right strategies to make it happen so for me it's really slow it down and everyone needs a compelling future what do I mean by that anybody can deal with a tough today if they have a compelling tomorrow but What's happened is there are a large number of people that after the first run of 2020 we were coming into January and I remember that and people are like all
right now it's a new world it's a new life it's it's going to go great and then you know all of a sudden more people died in 2021 with with vaccines and with all these details that we have and so people are uncertain and then we got omnicron and people are making it like Great Plague when if you actually Look at the science the vast majority are showing it's more like a cold or really gentle flu but it doesn't matter we're tracking everything now if you imagine if we were tracking the flu constantly where it
was we just we don't test everybody so we don't freak out all the time so what are you going to do to create a compelling future for yourself what do you really want this year to be about regardless of what's going on the outside world you might say well that's Easy to say but they're controlling my business or they're shutting me down here you can move you know you can make new choices I know they're not easy ones but you got to get to the point you say I won't settle for less than I can
really do be share create and give in my life for my family for myself for what what I want for my life there's a point we got to say enough is enough and you got to start to take control how do you do that one of the things that you say That I love is fear is physical and what I learned from you so many years ago that transformed my life is to begin to learn to change my state with my physiology yes everything in my life starts with my physiology from my fitness but also
when I'm feeling something I don't want to feel I try to shift my physiology and I just heard you recently say this so I'd like you to speak to it that fear is also a physical thing I want you to elaborate a little Bit about that well first of all if you're concerned about covid according to CDC and I have this in my new book the number one you know issue besides age obviously the number one piece is being overweight right or obese that is number one and just this week CNN New York Times for
the first time two years later are coming at saying you can reduce your risk if you take care of your body right do you know what number two is according to the C fear because When you get fearful it changes your breathing your body temperature your tension in your body all these things can create a trigger of reactions hormones in your body that make you crazy so when I say fear is physical here's what I mean you fear is physical by the way so is courage emotions are physical if you're really scared if you ever
been that point where you're like freaked out about something and you can't quite fully swallow or you got That feeling in your gut certainly but courage is also physical that's what you're talking about like it's like I train myself from a very young age at number one thing I had to do so I would follow through on the things we're talking about here is I had to have a mind and body that were strong together that every day I was going to do something to strengthen my body even if it was just 10 minutes or
15 minutes something was going to shift me Physiologically to do that and so I you know I get scared or I get frustrated I go on a run I go on a Sprint and I wasn't in shape didn't matter I push myself beyond what I was comfortable with I go lift weights and I pushed beyond what I was comfortable with and when you do that everything in your nervous system changes all of a sudden when You Face something and you push beyond the comfort zone you get stronger and stronger even a little bit each day
Changes things so think about a courage that's not you're not afraid because there'd be no need for courage courage is you're scared itless but you do it anyway yeah and so training your body and you and I both do this right we train intensely because we know this is the resource through which my mind's going to try to make decisions and then the second thing is every day you got to feed your brain your mind because if you don't crap is going in there Automatically we all know that right I mean today it's chasing you
because we all know the news knows they're not bad people they're good people they're just doing their job their job is make sure they make as much money for their shareholders and they know one formula works and it's pretty obvious these last two years more than ever if it bleeds it leads if it produces fear more people watch it's because we all have a two- million year old brain that's always Looking for what's wrong what can hurt us but your 2 million year old brain is not going to make you happy right you have to
take control of that 2 million year old brain and start to direct consciously what you want your life to be so changing your body radically by a workout by a run by a push by whatever you're going to do shifting by feeding your brain every single day and then making sure every day you're taking some form of action towards a compelling Future like what am I going to make better if you have nothing to look forward to you're going to be pissed off you're going to be frustrated you're going to be depressed you're going to
be overwhelmed and in those emotional states even though you're a smart person and you know lots of things you won't use anything you know know so to me the leverage to changing somebody's life is always starting with the human body if I started to speak to you and I spoke more At uh this Tempo and I said yeah I really think people should get their act together and make this their best year ever right I feel terrible my body now I'm not saying everybody needs to talk fast or loud like me that's my own physiology
but kind of trained but everyone has has different gears and when you're low gears like you can be in a great relationship somebody you totally love and you're both in a great physical state emotional state Everything's great you both get a little love from taking the kids to 20 soccer practices and cash FL problems in the business and all that stuff and all a sudden Same Love doesn't feel like the same love you still love each other but it doesn't come across and if you're both stressed out then it creates problems in the relationship so
the most important factor in your life is the ability to manage your mental emotional state is the one thing you have complete Control of once you learn how then it becomes just the daily discipline and after soon it's not even discipline it just becomes Habit to say I'm not going to live in this lousy Pace I'm not going to put up with it I know what to do let me do it let me move forward but that's why you know I do programs and events where I imerse people yeah because you know you and I
can talk about this few minutes kind of Nod your head but if I put you in an experience correct I Always tell people a belief is a poor substitute for an experience you can have a belief about China I take you to China you're going to have an experience very different true so I think human beings need to puts more in experiences a lot of us today especially with Co being stuck at home and doing business from home a lot of people are stuck in their head I tell you get in your head you're dead
you'll just go in circles you got to get that body and that energy Moving and then your head will start to work as well okay so you've all been listening now for say 10 minutes there's two things already number one do you have this compelling future if if someone asked you right now what's that vision for your future second thing is what are you doing in your body to create a change to Anchor things to change your state the third thing was Tony talked about his events and I just I want to get this Out
on the table right away one of the most incredible things is you've done events for literally millions of people from every continent every country on the planet and I mean what I said I'm not saying that because we're friends I don't I I just I think you've posibly affected more lives than any person that I'm aware of that's just true and I the fact that you now are offering a free event it's just bananas to me I mean it's it's incredible to me so I think It's starts on January 25th but I want people to
know about this because this could be that catalyst help you know create that compelling future and maybe transcend your environment so tell us just a little bit about that event I tell why I did it I did it you know after 2020 about halfway through the year people were just so depressed you saw people gaining weight people had no clear idea what they're going to do so I said okay I'm going to do an event for The whole world let's just let's use YouTube let's use all the different tools that we can let's bring them
all together and we had 400,000 people and I was like let me do one for three hours but I'm not really capable of that so I was like well we'll do two days we'll do two days for 90 minutes and then I made it five days yeah and the reason I do that is not cuz I like to talk it's because you need a certain amount of immersion it's like learning a language If you only learn a little bit at a time you don't remember it two years later but if I put you in Rome
day and night for a month you're going to come out speaking Italian so that's my theory so what I did was I did five days we had 400,000 people join us and every day we took a part of their their body their emotions their relationships and the goal is get them A New Perspective because it's hard to do that when you're at home but not when you're in this Audience literally of almost half a million people but last year we did it again we had 860,000 people that join me for 5 days so I'm doing
one final one because I'm praying this is the last of covid but I really want to help people here at the beginning of the year because you see so many people now are caught up in what I call learned helplessness when you've been disappointed oh you get a gut check but most people pick themselves back up but If you get disappointed enough times there's a point when your brain goes the problem's permanent it's just or it's pervasive because I can't turn my business around my life is over which is not true or it's personal there's
something wrong with me and so I want to break those patterns and give people a direct experience so if you want to join me guys there's zero cost and you don't have to travel so it kind handles the two objections most people have and it's As you said it's coming up on January 25th through the 29th five days in a row about 90 minutes each day it's probably going to be more like two hours me but it's totally interactive it's not you just sitting passively and we're going to cover your body your emotions your relationship
your life and get you to have a plan for 2022 here here where you really can start to have a compelling future you have to make those distinctions when you're an entrepreneur So the reason I wanted you on is your tactic heavy like you're known for tactical stuff so everybody the rest of this interview we're going to get real granular on some different things we're also going to talk about how to build a life too because candy woke up at one point at 40 and had a bunch of money but didn't have a bunch of
life and so you can have a bunch of money and not be rich you can not live richly but one of the things you just said I want to Acknowledge I still am cheap and struggle with what you just said that I don't I would be wealthier and I would have been happier and I've had a lot of happiness and I've built a lot of wealth I'm I'm you know done okay on that stuff however I would have more of it had I been willing to evaluate what you just said what am I doing that
I could actually replace myself and pay somebody for but I was such a control freak and also cheap from time to time as an Entrepreneur that I didn't invest in head ahead of myself to scale and give myself a life so I want to acknowledge that the other thing that's happening right now is I think by every measurement we're in a recession MH right now I think we're in one now the depth of it the length of it I'm not capable of forecasting that yet maybe I'll never be capable of doing that if it could
forecast that no one lose money in recessions right but you have like Six things that you can Recession Proof your life in your business with you don't have to share all six but if someone's listening to this right now and they're like I think we're in a recession what are some Recession Proof strategies well first I want to say that when you hear that word it invokes a lot of fear in people and it's specifically designed to do that right because that's what people click on that's what news topics are all about but you have
to Remember the most important part nothing that happens in our country's economy will ever be more important than what happens in your own personal economy and if you take the steps to really Recession Proof your life and you do really well in the good times so that you can set yourself up to do well in the bad times too like and what does that mean it's all the non sexy stuff like live within your means like for years years within my business I wasn't Making massive amounts of money but I was living beneath my means
I was saving and investing money into real estate starting at 20 years old so rather than going and buying all the fancy things that most people do I was looking at this long game how do I actually do this in 20 years and be able to be able to retire and quit and be able to do whatever I want so the first thing is that always remember that whatever you do is far more important and that There's always opportunity that's why when I did the research for the book since 2020 there has been more billionaires
made than any other time in history because when one area or industry goes bad there's so much opportunity so it's always keeping that in mind because if you're focused on the reality of oh the economic economic downturn and that's all you focus on then you're going to miss the opportunity that's right in front of us Yeah you're so right the the data tells us not only are more billionaires been created since 2020 but more millionaires are created during recessions yes than any other time whatever even recession means and I think you make a really good
point about that you this live below your means saying it's interesting to me when I actually meet a legitimately wealthy person and I am one also the commonalities are striking and they're simple things like I want to just accent Something you said there and I want to maybe talk about it a little bit more too living below your means is an absolute there's this Vogue thing out here right now that mean that every on social media everyone says get rid of all the money you make because it'll keep you hungry right get rid of all
the money you make which is really stupid advice said during booming economies which sounds really good when money just keeps flowing in but what happens if and When that gets reduced or if and when that slows down so it's like the worst advice by a bunch of people that don't know what they're talking about that got wealthy like in the last three or four or five years yeah I've been wealthy for 30 years you've been wealthy a long time the things we talk about actually work right and so I've lived below my means and I'm
I'm I want to just say this to everybody I'm talking about like being a crazy person going you know what I spend Four bucks on a coffee at Starbucks I can make one at home for 90 I'm saving the $3 in some sort of sa are you that nuts about it cuz I was I think if you don't save money when you don't have a lot you're probably not going to save money when you do have a lot absolutely it's a habit like how you build wealth is a habit and when you start developing that
habit when you have a little whatever you develop you're going to do the same thing when you have a lot so I Mean I could go at any point in my life I could have went and bought the Rolls Royce the Bentley the whatever and I just I just couldn't do it I couldn't bring myself to do it I still drive a car I I never buy a brand new car I never have debt on bad debt or car payments I buy like my Range Rover I bought three years old and I parked it right
next to a client of mine that had a brand new one that paid 140,000 for it and I'm like that is the stupidest thing Like why wouldn't you buy it three years old you could have got it half price yes you know so it it's I don't I don't understand I think the the way the litmus test that someone can decide right now if they're living beyond their means is this one little tactic is if you can't save if you can't invest 20% of your money right now if I say to you the only way
that you can get wealthy is to take 20% of what you're earning right Now and you need to start investing it here's what you invest in and if you say oh my gosh I can't do it you're overspending I so totally agree and what's really great about this conversation is almost no one talks about this anymore like it's completely counterculture now it's like spend everything you make I have um I bought my first new car for my wife by the way not for me last year and I'm 51 I don't buy new people go man
your jets are Unbelievable they are unbelievable and they're a freaking fortunate and I've never bought a brand new one y why would I do that why would I buy go buy a G550 that someone paid 55 million for that 202 24 months later I can pay $22 million for and 36 months later I can pay $15 million for and I know those are huge numbers but why would I spend $10,000 on a Range Rover where 18 months later I can buy the same damn thing for 6800 th000 bucks or whatever the heck The math is
on it right I'm totally with you on that because I think and by the way if you're in a relationship there's Just Two Types of People in life there are Savers and Spenders and if you live alone you're either a saver or a spender you want to build the habit of being a saver and an investor if you're married to somebody I hope at least one of you is a Savor here's a formula for a broke marriage two Spenders do you agree with that two Spenders that are in a marriage Together are toast they cannot
physically make enough money to ever get wealthy cuz they spend so I'm with you on that okay someone's listening and they say all right I'm actually listening to this and I have a job and I don't think I always want to have one um the self-employed thing sounds a little better but the business owner thing sounds really good you have something in here that you talk about how to start a business while keeping your steady Paycheck I think you and I did it the same way in the same industry so but I'll let you talk
about what you think one of those ways is so the easiest way to keep your job and do something else is to find what do you already have EXP experience in what do you have skills in this isn't about like start posting on the internet that you are a business coach if you've never built a business like it drives me insane like have integrity what you have experience in What you have skills in and you can start doing that on the side for yourself it opens you up to building a business you can get an
LLC it opens you up to tax savings which we talk about in the book too like when you be when you are a business owner or a real estate investor now you have the same thing that these massive corporations pay millions of dollars in lobbyists to get breaks now you have them too so if you're doing something currently in your Job just do it for yourself it could be going on upwork or Fiverr it could be you know going to Facebook group in a community that you live in and say hey I'm an electrician but
I'm also taking a little bit of side jobs on the on the side contact me here I've seen people build massive businesses stringing lights and doing landscaping and turning into a real business so that they don't you know it's easy for people to say burn the boats create the business but Sometimes if you have a family to depend on that's reckless advice man like you're totally right and this is I'm again everybody why today is so important to me is I have real deep concerns about the advice I see being thrown around on social media
and in a lot of coaching programs that will work when all of the economy is exploding yes you almost in a good economy can't give somebody too much stupid advice because the tide keeps Rising where you separate Great advice from so so or terrible advice is when the economy recesses to some extent that's when all of the flaws in something is revealed when there's a bunch of water flowing you don't see all the Rocks Under the Ocean but when it starts to recess and the tide comes back then you see the rocks and the bumps
and the scary stuff so you're 100% right about that if you have a family maybe you shouldn't burn every single bat maybe your kids need to eat maybe them Going to school still matters maybe there's a transition period maybe there's a time where you're going to have three jobs yeah right you're going to have your fulltime time job another job and your side hustle and that's okay as well because it's going to make a great story for you someday and maybe you don't want to stress out your relationship you know sometimes people burn the boats
go all in and then they're completely stressed out of their Mind because now they have all this responsibility there's another way that you can still build wealth and still have a great quality of life and I think that's the most important part of the whole thing is it's like a lot of the advice I hear which I think is what you're referencing is it's like there's this All or Nothing mental kinds rocks are still you're just see them but they were always there and I think with with any industry any Vertical any type of Market
it's always going to and we did research I looked at the last 40 Years of every Market the S&P 500 the real estate market and it always pulls back right so it's like and when you really look at the chart over time that's why wealth business relationships it's playing the long game because when you look at the chart it always pulls back but then in that opportunity when you can double down because you've lived below your means You've been able to invest then you can double down in these dips and you can create more wealth
than you ever would have if it was a straightup chart oh my gosh that's a fact by the way if it's a straightup chart it doesn't let the little person ever get on the train absolutely but when it dips is when small uh economically small people like myself when I started like when you started it allows us to get into the game if the chart just went straight up All the time we've missed it that's right but when it dips it's a good thing that's what everybody needs to get and I don't even know if
that we're in a big dip we may be in a huge dip right now and it may be not so big of a dip I don't know but what I do know is this is a great time to be living below your means as is all the time you say that the way we meet our pain defines who we are and I I want you to elaborate on that I've been saying lately that you Know on the other side of temporary pain often times we get introduced to another self Deo and Hill says that in
Think and Grow Rich and I find that when I speak about pain so when I speak about winning and competing and achievement I get incredible responses from people but when I speak about pain and suffering and even death and that you know that it will come for us at some point I've been speaking a lot lately about my father's passing that the depth of emotion the Depth of the energy the depth of the feeling is maybe a hundred times greater yeah when I touch on those topics than just the good stuff of winning and competing
and achievement so what do you mean when you say the way we meet our pains defines who our pain defines Who We Are we have a choice with our pain which comes into every life and the choice is we can either try to suppress it and ignore It and if we do that inevitably we are going to end up taking it out on ourselves in the form of depression or something like that or on the people around us or we have the choice of being with it and acknowledging it and it's not fun by definition
it's not fun um but there's a way in which we can transform or like try to transform that pain into something else I mean I think that's that's the heart of the creative impulse for most creative people they're Like looking at something painful in their life they're looking at their sense of longing and they're trying to turn it into something else and something more beautiful um is there is there a practical thing you can do every day to do that in other words when you are feeling these emotions of I don't know for me it's
not always pain sometimes it's just like Melancholy or um I think that's the right word for It for me sometimes is melancholy feeling about things that I enjoy sitting in for a while I do but is there a strategy that you use there is because there's a bunch in the book but is there one thing you would say to someone who says maybe I'm maybe I'm oding on Melancholy I need to turn it into something powerful I mean I guess the question is are you talking about being in a State of Mind where you are
enjoying it and grooving on it in which Case I don't think you need to do anything differently like when you're in that state of mind of like oh you know the sky is so overcast and I'm loving this music that that's the state in of itself to cultivate um but if you're talking about well I'm in a state where where the pain is actually really painful that's different um and a great technique for that is um something called expressive writing which I talk About in the book yep and and it's basically just the sheer Act
of just writing down what you're feeling without any thought of publishing it or anything like that quite the opposite you know get it out write it down rip it up um and this is based on studies from a guy named James pennebaker at UT Austin he's done all these crazy studies showing how powerful the the sheer Act of writing things down is it it improves your health it literally lowers your blood Pressure improves your success outcomes in life um greater sense of well-being so it's a way of a it's way of discharging what you're feeling
but also what you end up doing when you write it down is you're sense making you're like making sense of what's Happening um and you're figuring out how you want to move forward with whatever has just caused you this pain the reason I ask you that is because in the book you sort of State this this belief system that I agree With that maybe these are the emotional states of creativity and that when we look at Art often times it is born out of these sort of emotions when we listen to music that really moves
us it's born out of even comedy ironically favorite thing most comedians are touching on something uncomfortable painful or the ironies of life and so most art why do I say this to everybody because I have the benefit when I experience these things I create Speeches that I give or books that I write or podcasts that I'm going to do or content that I create but a lot of people just sort of sit in these emotions and you asked earlier which is it for me and I think most human beings would say this it depends on
the day it depends on how long and so I want you to talk about this because I just wanted to ask you this personally there's a point in time where I'm in these states of contemplating you know you say the Fragility of life and how you understand death has a lot to do with how you live I'd like you to touch on that give you a long answer here give you a long Runway so there's that and I do that a lot or you know just just allowing myself to sit in a state of just
it doesn't always have to be 15 degrees of bliss all the time and it's okay to sit on a kind of Misty day and just enjoy the gray a little bit now having said that I think most people who have that proclivity Predisposition or even disposition which may be all of us you can then sit in it a little too long though and that's what I mean by the abundance of an emotion right there's a point where you're going now I'm not creating out of this state now it's impacting me the other way where it
paralyzes me or freezes me or makes me tired it can even impact your energy level so what would you say about all that yeah um these are amazing questions So um first of all the in terms of the the creative idea one of the things I say in the book is whatever pain you can't get rid of make that your creative offering and as you say there there's just so many studies and so many examples that I talk about of the ways in which creators do exactly that you know and it's not an accident that
so many of our great creatives over time were orphaned before the age of 18 like an astonishing percentage of them lost One or both parents before age 18 because that's what they're doing you know they're figuring out how to take that ultimate longing that they're left with um and turn it into something else but to your other question of like how do you know when it's just right or too much it's a really important point because I there there's a kind of happy and creative state of melancholy that we were just talking about and then
I think F farther down that spect you get to Something that looks more like clinical depression um where you it's very difficult to be creative when you're actually depressed I mean depression is more about like an emotional numbness and a hopelessness and a sense of disconnection whereas the happy Melancholy we were talking about you're feeling intensely connected so the thing to do is to sort of tune into where you are um in that Spectrum right and if you feel you're slipping towards something That resembles IAL depression like that's a that's a time to get help
as opposed to um only thinking well how can I you can keep on trying to turn it into something else but you also might need to be looking to outside resources for help with what about what about this buddh I think it's a Buddhist practice you talk about in the book called meta is that what it's called oh yeah yeah what is that I think this is a tool that could be used by People sort of uh in all situations but maybe particularly the one that I'm discussing if you could just get into that just
for a second because I think it's super powerful yeah absolutely So Meta is a practice that basically means loving kindness meditation and um and I'm actually by the way I'm creating my own loving kindness meditation which will be up on my website in the next month or so for people who are interested in doing my Version of it and and that's Susan k.net if you're curious but loving kindness meditation it's basically a form of meditation in which you kind of actively unconsciously wish well-being peace you know good things love to well interestingly classically you first
wish it to yourself and then after that you wish it to people who you know very well um to acquaintances ultimately you wish it to the difficult people in your in your Life you kind of like move outward from there what's interesting is for a lot of Americans they have a lot of trouble beginning with wishing these good things to themselves so very often people need to turn it upside down and wish it to other people first before they feel comfortable getting around their own selves there's no magic though you can do it in either
direction my favorite time in church I was raised Catholic my favorite time in Church and when you're a little kid in Catholic Church there's a lot of stand up sit down kneel you know we're going to say the are father there's all repetitive nature to the service and um my favorite part of church on Sundays was the one little moment where you get to turn to your neighbor and say peace be with you oh yeah and I loved that part of church in fact I miss it because I don't go to that church any longer
and my dad said to me when I was a little Guy and this is even when my dad was drinking because he was still a really good man he goes you know I do that quietly all the time when I pass strangers I said what do you mean Dad and he goes oh when I pass someone like I open a door I'm in an elevator I'll just quietly say peace be with you I wish you peace and he said even when people walk by us in restaurants Eddie I'll do that and that's a practice ice
that I've I've had all my life because a Lot of times with parents things are caught not taught right yes one of the greatest gifts I give myself all the time is on my quiet prayers when I see somebody I'll even see a family at a table and just say peace be with you and just that feeling feels so good to connect with someone's Soul who may not even consciously know you're connecting with them but I have this belief system that subconsciously spiritually from an energetic Soul Perspective they do feel and so I love that
you bring that up I completely agree with you I have total Goosebumps listening to the fact that you do that and um and and I think not only from a soul perspective even if you look at it just from a human evolution perspective we are designed to pick up on each other's cues and we do it in a thousand ways that we're not even consciously aware of which is so I think people would be picking it up you know Um yeah from you saying that and that's exactly what practicing meta does like I notic whenever
I I'm not as good as I should be about doing this all the time but I notice whenever I do practice it you know then I go out into the world and I'm just sort of like automatically doing some version of what you just said do you know why it works for someone like you and I and almost everybody listening because it's going to go to the other thing I want to talk about Which is that I'm an introvert and some people say don't ever label yourself as an introvert no I I'm introverted and I
I love that I'm introverted and I want to the reason I share this whatever you want to call it technique or strategy that my dad taught me it's just really an act of kindness it's not really a strategy but it's also something an introvert can do because you don't have to say anything to give someone a prayer so it's my my way of connecting with Someone in the unspoken way and I may never I mean there's the truth I've connected with millions of people this way probably in my life that I've actually never spoken to
and what a I think a much deeper connection than Hi how are you good have a great day I think much deeper connection is to say peace be with you or you know I I wish you a beautiful day I wish you Bliss like I love saying that quietly to myself for another person don't you Agree oh my gosh I absolutely love it and I am sure you're radi radiating something at them when you're doing it I feel that way too I do too I I'll give you another version of something like that that I
do it's almost like the flip side of what you just described so I I wrote In the book about um this video that the Cleveland Clinic put out that went viral Cleveland Clinic is a hospital and the video was designed to to um teach empathy to their caregivers And so what this video did it it like it takes you through the hallways of the hospital and you're passing all these random people who you normally wouldn't think one way or another except in this case there are these little captions that are underneath each random person as
you pass them by and the captions tell you what the person is going through at that moment and sometimes it's happy things like you know just found out he's going to be a father for The first time but more often because it's a hospital uh the captions are things like you know under a little girl going to say goodbye to her father for the last time like like these heartbreaking things you cannot watch this video without tearing up it's impossible so once I saw this video I started to do this practice where I just try
to imagine what people's captions are as I pass them by you know just in everyday life I love it I love it and I don't know the answers but there's something about wondering what they are that makes you interact with them completely differently you know and care about them in a different way I love you I do that too and I I I I sometimes perhaps I'm making it up in my mind and I'm just GNA say I've never said this before I've never thought about it consciously to you just said it but we get
everyone gets to listen to you and I talk about this which is cool Right this is no longer a podcast it's just you and I talking but often times oh my gosh this just confirms what you believe so much more deeply it just dawned on me I do do that quietly when I watch people or I'm in a place and it's harder and harder the more well-known you are to do it intimately because someone sees you than they know you so that's it's a little harder than it used to be for me but I do
do it and I also ironically sometimes sense their pain And I almost project a story onto them in my mind about what they are insecure or they feel invisible often times because I think these folks feel so visible this is my way of seeing them even though maybe auditory wise they don't know it and so I actually it makes me really even confirm your work even more because I don't usually picture them in their most Blissful or Happy State I picture them in their pain and their sadness and that That just must prove even more
deeply that's how we connect with one another yeah absolutely I mean we're designed to do it right like we the species wouldn't survive if we couldn't look after helpless children in who come into this world as crying infants like that's what we do and uh because of that like that that ability radiates outward from there so um by the way if people wonder whether this is true give them this stat see if I'm a business person listening To this okay what's the bus give resarch yeah I the business application of this is maybe you should
stop always trying to connect with people on their Victory and their wins and what you or your company can do for them but begin to connect much more deeply with people which is their pain and their anxieties and their fears and their story their sadness I think you'd find youd connect a whole lot more deeper even as a busy person but give us the research Especially the one about the songs on the playlist oh yeah okay both okay so the songs on the playlist well there's a lot to say about that first of all people
whose um favorite songs are sad songs like you uh listen well well we'll start with the other way people whose favorite songs are their happy at beat songs they listen to them about 175 times people like you who love the sad songs 800 times crazy and we also know that um the songs that make people feel You know the chills and the Goosebumps and the real feels they're the sad songs they're always the sad songs yeah and people will say this is what makes me feel connected to you know to the sublime to the wondrous
to something outside myself it's always the sad songs um I love it I love it I want everyone to know that by the way you and I both always want to give the cave we like sunny days yes like happy songs too just we kind of have a tendency towards the Other so you're also going to talk about this research what I was talking about from a business standpoint I think you're going to kind of confirm some of that research oh yeah well what I wanted to say about like people connecting to each other through
their sadness so like there's this amazing psychologist whose story I tell in the book his name is daker Kelner um and he he's done all this groundbreaking research proving what he calls the compassionate Instinct In people and compassion what it literally means that we're is with sorrow like with suffering so it means you know you're reacting to somebody else's pain or distress the way you were just saying so he's he's located this in our bodies basically um like if you yeah just one example and there's a a whole bunch of them but we have a
what's called a Vagas nerve it's the biggest um bundle of nerves in our bodies it governs our breathing and our digestion So it's very fundamental to who we are and to our survival and also when you see another being in pain your vagus nerve becomes very activated interesting yeah so it's like the same nerve that's helping you breathe is also telling you to respond to the pain of the person to whom you've just wished well in the grocery store that's how we're designed I love it I just think everyone maybe this could give you a
different perspective On how you interact and view humans and one another just this little I don't think even Susan you know how big this theory is and that I'm validating as a truth because I think Tak to its logical extension would change the way that Humanity interacts with one another how we treat one another our religious and political differences are you know are slight nuances that make us different this is this is what would connect People in a much more kind way it would give leaders of companies and teams and businesses and countries a completely
different perspective on how to lead and connect with people and bring them together so I love love this work I have to share something with you about this connecting with people with their pain and it'll take me a minute but my audience knows some of this but here's how correct your work is my dad was an alcoholic and a little bit of a drug Addict and the biggest decision on my lifetime was my dad getting sober and he stayed sober for the rest of his life like 35 years but about three weeks ago I read
your book because I knew we were going to do this and the next night Susan I just want to share with you how profound this work is and these thoughts are for everybody so I read your book I read it in a sitting and that night I went to bed oh excuse me the next night when I Went to sleep I had this Vivid dream of something I didn't realize that I'm 51 years old and that is that someone helped my dad and some precious Soul stepped forward and helped my father get sober in the
darkest moment of his life when he was losing his family maybe losing his life and some precious human connected with my dad and changed my family forever changed my great- grandchildren people listening to this you wouldn't be listening to this and Guess how he connected with my dad through their shared pain and suffering that person was also an alcoholic also a drug addict they knew the shame yeah they knew the fear they knew the embarrassment they knew the frustration they knew the depression that came with the the patterns of behavior had that person connected with
my dad through Bliss and sunshine and rainbows or their own Perfection their own lack of pain they would have never been able to help My father they reached my dad through connecting through shared suffering through shared pain and then from there said here's how I can help you so from every perspective in life the Connecting Point is here and then how I can help you isn't that a great example oh my God it's an amazing amazing amazing example thank you so much for sharing that yeah and I think I don't have that dream if I
don't read your book the day before I don't because it opens up that's why art This podcast it'll just I guarantee everybody there's millions of people listening to this driving in their car on the treadmill or with their family they're looking at the person the next person they see just a little bit differently looking in the backseat at their babies and they're looking at someone at the grocery store and they're going to think about their friends differently and this this is where change comes from the other thing though I have to ask you about I
I I to I just want to say I totally agree and I I have thought this before about like our hopelessly divided politics and culture and religion everything that I think what we should be doing is figuring out spaces for people just to be able to share their stories and share the pains that they've gone through without it being connected at least temporarily without it being connected to any call for Policy change or a political agenda or anything like that just for people from different backgrounds from Red from Blue from everywhere to just tell their
stories that's it I love it I I I actually believe that um know I get asked sometimes about I over run for office and I that's highly unlikely but I do believe that that's where uh change comes from is just saying just please hear me and listen to me and then you can reach your own conclusions it's when They think that there's a hook coming or a pitch or a close or a something we want you to do is when people are turned off and I think if you just say just please hear me you
know whatever you believe about guns or no guns or school security or mental health whatever the issues are to hear some of these parents that just had this tragedy happen in Texas and just to hear their pain just just hear them many of them have differing views themselves on what Should be done about it but you would reach a more beautiful and correct conclusion if you just listened to people and heard their pain [Music] he