This is the prime time to get deep into some hardcore hardcore brainwashing. So, we're going to take the most hardcore approaches that have ever been done and learn how to like redirect it on oursel first. This is the way that I do it.
I reverse engineered every classified and unclassified training document I've ever read in my life and just kind of reverse engineered it [music] to work on myself and to change my own behavior. And I think there's a ton of really high quality out there about goal setting and and discipline and and how to change your own behavior. If your brain does not have the raw materials to [music] produce motivation and and focus and emotional regulation, there is no mindset on earth or meditation program in the [music] world that's ever going to save you ever.
So I don't care how disciplined that you think you should be. If the chemistry is off, the system fails. Period.
Full stop. [music] And that's a just a mechanical failure. So, it's not that you didn't accomplish your goals or you were weak or that you needed more discipline or more motivation.
It's just that the system you're using is underpowered. So, most people in this room don't have a discipline problem. You have [music] a manufacturing problem.
So, neurotransmitters are not beliefs. But there are three big chemicals that decide if you're going to win. And I want to [music] try to strip this down to what actually matters.
And the first one is dopamine. And on our final exams when I was in school for this, there were three words for all the neurotransmitters that we had to memorize, which was a great way to kind of shorthand it. And for dopamine in college for me, it was drive, direction, and pursuit.
Drve, direction, pursuit. [music] So people say dopamine is pleasure. That's a lie.
It's way completely false. Dopamine dysregulation is the cause of Parkinson's. Has nothing to do with pleasure.
So dopamine is misunderstood. Dopamine is the signal that something is worth moving toward. So when dopamine is healthy, if I make some effort, it feels meaningful.
If I make some progress in my life, it feels real. And the actions that I'm taking towards a goal or whatever feel really obvious. If dopamine's low in the brain, feels pointless.
Planning replaces action. [music] I'm going to do all these journals, the little one-year plans, little whiteboards. The word tomorrow becomes kind of a lifestyle for us.
And the second neurotransmitter is serotonin. [music] And the three words I want you just to think about with serotonin is control, stability, and restraint. [music] Serotonin is not happiness.
I want you to think of serotonin as impulse [music] control. It's the chemical that lets you pause instead of just reacting to something. It lets you [music] delay gratification.
It lets you stick with something when it gets uncomfortable. So, if your serotonin is low, it looks like emotional volatility. You have more anxiety.
You get pissed off more easily. It's the I know exactly what I should do, but I can't make myself do it. And the third chemical is norepinephrine.
Norepinephrine. And the three words I I want you to associate with this are readiness, energy, [music] and backbone. So this is the one that people confuse with stress.
[music] But if you look at norepinephrine, it's regulated intensity. Healthy levels of neuroepinephrine [music] feel like an alert sense of calm, like you're more resilient to stress, [music] and like a readiness to act if something happens. Low norepinephrine is brain fog, avoidance, learned helplessness, fatigue that sleep [music] won't fix.
And if your norepinephrine is too high, we have anxiety and panic and burnout and definitely definitely going to get some insomnia there. But let me kill one more myth here. And this is a big one I had written down.
Vitamin and mineral deficiencies don't just happen to malnourished kids in Somalia. They happen to people that are stressed, that are that live a busy life, that are disciplined, people who push through stuff, uh people who skip meals, people who sleep like people who live on a whole lot of caffeine and adrenaline. So, I want I just want you to write this one thing down.
Stress burns nutrients. And if I have less nutrients, I have inflammation. And inflammation blocks the absorption even further.
And then sleep deprivation wrecks our receptor sensitivity, the receptors that we need to absorb all this good stuff. So you can eat a the most perfect diet ever and still be super depleted. So your body is not failing on its own.
It's adapting to essentially what you're doing to it is abuse. So let me say the lie out loud in a in a way that makes total sense for you. If you define your goal clearly enough, if you want it badly enough and you visualize it long enough, your behavior is going to start aligning.
That sounds reasonable, but it's absolutely completely wrong. Cuz what what is that assuming? When you go watch a Tony Robbins goal setting video, what's it assuming?
It assumes that you're a rational decision maker. You have stable motivation. It assumes that you have stable motivation that never goes away.
This assumes a completely cooperative [music] nervous system that's running on balanced neurotransmitters and has no deficiencies. And it also assumes a brain [music] that prioritizes the future over the present. Not one of those things describe a human being under stress.
This is why they fail. So if your identity says, "I'm the kind of person who quits. I quit everything.
I'm inconsistent. I always fall off. I do I start everything great and I finish everything in a shitty way.
" Your nervous system will protect that story no matter how badass and pretty and awesome the goal is. [music] The brain values predictability above success. I'm going to say that again.
That's very important. The brain values predictability over success. Let me slaughter one more sacred [music] cow here.
Willpower is a myth and people call it a trait. He's got good willpower. I have high or low.
Willpower is a temporary chemical [music] state and that's all it is. And when you hear all these people out there saying, "Well, I just need more discipline. " What they're really saying is you should override biology indefinitely.
[music] And I think you know, even if you've been in grad school for 3 weeks, you know that that's ignorant. I'm going to say this in a way that sounds like it might contradict what I've said before in grad school, but hang with me for a minute. You do not have habits the way that people talk about habits.
[music] You have an identity that produces predictable behavior. That's what you call habits. You have an identity that produces predictable behavior.
Identity is what your nervous system predicts you will do under pressure. That's identity. That's all it is.
So your brain has one big sacred rule is do not violate the story. Do not violate the story. The big roadblock is that identity change feels [music] like death.
So you're behaving in a way that contradicts your identity. You're violating your brain's number one rule. Stay with the story.
You're violating the rule [music] of the brain. So your brain experiences this as danger, exposure. I'm going to get judged.
There's a loss of belonging, a loss of predictability. So [music] you have to destroy the old one first. So there's three mechanisms that change identity fast, especially if you're manipulating another person.
embarrassment, disgust, and aversion. [music] Those three things you can change an identity, but we're doing it to ourselves. So, we stop [music] forever for the rest of your life.
Stop saying, "I'm working on myself or I'm trying to change. " And start being disgusted with that other version of yourself. Absolutely nauseated, disgusted.
You always repeat the phrase, "That version is beneath me. That behavior is unbelievably embarrassing. That behavior is disgusting.
That thought process is disgusting. I don't recognize myself when I act like that. And then we're going to employ another tactic that narcissists use and cults use on [music] our self.
And this one is shame. Shame is a fast controller of human behavior. Uncontrolled shame is [music] destructive.
Targeted shame, if it's aimed at a specific behavior or an identity pattern, is one of the fastest ways to change. The reason for this is because shame is a social survival signal. It tells the mamalian brain, "This behavior threatens my standing.
And standing or reputation matters more than comfort every single time. " That's why people change it instantly. Instantly.
You've seen it before in your life. I guarantee [music] it. If continuing your old behavior feels comfortable, then you haven't killed the identity yet.
That's a good rule. So, the goal is this. Here's the number one goal that I want you to set for the new year.
My old behaviors feel awkward. [music] My old excuses sound stupid. And my old routines feel foreign.
That's how you know it's working. If those [music] three come true. If you think motivation is the problem, this is dopamine depletion, over stimulation, or [music] you're lacking visible or monitored progress.
So, the thing that you need to do here is shrink the task until completion is absolutely guaranteed. [music] You introduce these little measurable wins and you remove all novelty drains from your life except for the ones that you create yourself. [music] Not I'm talking about like doom scrolling and stuff like that.
If discipline collapses the moment you have some kind of stress, this is likely serotonin instability, poor sleep, the fix here is just behavioral routines at fixed times and eliminate choices during any high stress period. If you're the type who avoids hard stuff, this is norepinephrine, [music] threat sensitivity, learned helplessness. You need short controlled exposure to discomfort if this is you.
[music] So, this could be super cold water, like taking a cold shower in the morning. I personally prefer James Bond showers is what I call them. I start off with a hot shower and just kind of gradually turn that that [music] thing uh down as I'm getting through.
So, if you're the type that starts strong and fades out, the likely causes of this is noveltydriven dopamine. [music] And the what you're lacking is ritual. And I just want you to maybe write this down if if it's necessary for you.
Behavior will change chemistry faster than any thought in your life ever will. [music] You cannot think your way into confidence.
