How women DISRESPECT men without realizing it: understanding power

I'm Dr Orion taban and this is psycha Better Living Through psychology and the topic of today's short talk is how women disrespect men without realizing it understanding power so this is the first installment of a two-part episode for the ladies I'm here to help you understand how you might be getting in your own way with respect to your relationships with men as I mentioned in my episode how to get any man you want the unbreakable rule the one thing that you women must absolutely never do to the man with whom you want to have a

long-term relationship is disrespect him this does not mean that you have to respect him though that would obviously be preferred disrespecting someone and not respecting someone aren't the same thing and this also does not mean that you have to agree with him or approve of everything that he does however it does mean that you have to find a way to disagree or disapprove in a way that does not disrespect him and trust me this is possible to do now there are some very obvious ways in which women are subject to disrespecting men they can do

this through open mockery and contempt or passive aggression and neglect or even physical or emotional abuse I'm not talking about these things I take it that the vast majority of women understand that these behaviors are disrespectful and toxic rather today's talk is going to be about ways in which women disrespect men without realizing it the idea here is to call women's attention to the ways in which they may be inadvertently sabotaging the relationships they want with the men they want to have them with and keep in mind I'm not arguing that women have a moral

or ethical responsibility not to do these things Visa men I'm arguing that women who voluntarily choose not to do these things will be much more effective in achieving their relationship goals this is all about Effectiveness across these two episodes I'll be briefly discussing five ways women often disrespect men without realizing it this list is by no means exhaustive but it should serve as a general template for examining one's behavior in light of this value as stated in previous episodes the general rule of thumb when it comes to disrespect is if you wouldn't say the same

thing in the same way to your boss if you were interested in keeping your job then you shouldn't say that in that way to the man with whom you want to be in a long-term relationship so we're not only talking about criticizing and demeaning language like word choice we're also talking about nonverbal cues of disrespect like eye rolling or dismissive sighing or po body language Etc as we'll see most of these behaviors involve women inappropriately assuming more power than is warranted in their intimate relationships which is emotionally perceived by men as disrespect let's jump right

into it the first way that women disrespect men without realizing it is through inappropriate questioning the ability to ask question CH s is a privilege that is awarded to those with more power have you ever been arrested in the interrogation room you don't get to ask the officers questions they do just like they say in all the cop dramas hey we're the ones asking questions here have you ever attended a session of the Supreme Court during oral arguments the justices are empowered to ask the attorneys present as many questions as they want even interrupting their

responses to ask ask even more questions if necessary the attorneys never get a chance to grill the justices why because the court wasn't convened to answer to the lawyers that would be an inappropriate usurpation of authority women when you interrogate Men by questioning their intentions their whereabouts their motivations their choices you are basically communicating that you believe that you occupy a more power ful position relative to them you communicate that you believe that you have a right to know certain things and that you believe he must answer to you and it's only the less powerful

who must answer to the more powerful never the other way around this is functionally placing yourself in a higher position relative to that man which will absolutely be perceived as disrespect find ways to learn what you want with without prying or interrogating despite what you believe no man has any obligation to answer to you now before I go any further if you're liking what you're hearing please consider sending this episode to someone who might benefit from its message because it's Word of Mouth referrals like this that really helped to make the channel grow and you

can also go to my website and tip me in proportion to the value you feel you've derived from this message using the venmo link provided I'm doing it this way because I get all of your donation that way as opposed to just a fraction of it when going through YouTube I really appreciate your support it helps keep all of this running thank you now the second way that women disrespect men without realizing it is through granting permission in general we have to ask permission of those who have the authority to grant our requests this means

that we act as though the good in question is actually in the possession of the authority who can grant gr us permission whether that's technically true or not taking possession of that good without permission would be an egregious Act of insubordination and this is because permission only moves from the high to the low those with more power never have to ask permission of those with less now the fact of the matter is that unless you come to a mutual agreement to the contrary a man has no obligation to ask your permission for anything even if

he's in a committed relationship with you he was a sovereign and autonomous individual when you met him and he remains a sovereign and autonomous individual until he explicitly enters into a new arrangement to the contrary this means that a man has absolutely no obligation to ask your permission or check in with you first to spend time with his friend or leave his house or pursue his Hobbies or really do whatever it is that he wants to do with what could very well be his One and Only Life on this planet women would you want to

ask your man's permission before you spent your own money wouldn't that like wrankle you like it's your money you earned it why should any man have the power to decide what you do with it well by the same token why would any man need to ask your permission on how to spend his own time it's his life not yours a woman who acts as though a man must ask her permission to spend his own time is like a man who acts as though a woman must ask him permission to spend her own money only worse

because you can get money back and expecting your man to check in with you before he makes a decision with respect to how how he spends his own time is acting as though you have the authority to Grant or withhold permission on the matter as before this is functionally placing yourself in a higher position relative to that man which once again will absolutely be perceived as disrespect and of course any man who allows himself to fall into this Dynamic is more than partly to blame for his situation all right the Third Way that women disrespect

men without realizing it is through surveillance this could be done through a location tracking app or snooping through his phone or rifling through his finances even the government isn't allowed to do these things without permission the fact of the matter is your desire to know does not take precedence over his right to privacy women who do these things are functionally treating their men like pets and acting like their owners as should be obvious vious this is placing yourself in a higher position relative to that man which will be perceived as disrespect you got it and

it will be perceived as disrespect even if the motivations for doing so are neutral like simple curiosity or even positive like care or concern as with all of these the feeling that compelled you to act in this way is irrelevant it is the behavior itself self that is disrespectful parents can go into their children's rooms this is because everything in that room actually belongs to the parent like it's only the child's room in name and parents ultimately remain responsible for their children until they turn 18 it's not only their right it's their duty to supervise

their children's lives but this is only because children lack the capacity to supervise themselves on the other hand I'm willing to bet that your man was a fully functioning adult when you met him and he remains a fully functioning adult to this day acting as if you have a right or a duty to supervise his life is treating him like a child do you like being treated like a child do you like being in fantz does that hurt your Widow feeings like that's infuriating and dis respectful right like that's why we don't talk like that

to other adults but if we're committed not to infantilize adults with our words and tone we should likewise be committed not to infantilize adults with our actions and behaviors make sense all right that's enough for one episode I'll round out the list and make some final comments in the next installment so stay tuned what do you think does this fit with your own experience let me know in the comments below and if if you've gotten this far you might as well like this episode And subscribe to this channel you may also consider becoming a channel

member with perks like the priority review of comments or booking a paid consultation as always thank you for listening