most people when they feel an emotion they go they jump all the way to this last step which is let's figure out a way to think differently or what we need to do immediately to change this but that's not what what people actually need when they feel an emotion or when that comes up as a carrier of information they need to access what is this telling so that's the part where you let yourself fully experience the emotion including what created it and that's where you start to make sense to yourself because you sit down you're
like all right when did i start feeling this way so you're sort of like backtracking to like oh great okay so like i felt this way when that person slammed that door now that's the point which you can say when was the first time that somebody slammed a door around me what is it about them slandering and slamming a door what did i make it mean why was that so bad it's then you that that personal piece of information carry and the emotion starts to come up something like well by slamming a door they don't
care at all about my personal experience we're not saying that's necessarily true you don't know whether they don't care about your experience or not but that's how you received it based off of like maybe you you realize that that type of a thing or experience happened in your childhood life you can go back and undo that trauma
