this list is something so let's just get right into it number one Mozart so we're starting this list with Wolf Gang amadas Mozart one of the greatest composers in the history of Music chances are even if you're not a fan of classical music you've probably heard at least a few of his songs I'm playing one in the background right now but did you know that in addition to banging out over 800 legendary compositions Mozart also wrote a few songs about licking holes that's right songs as in multiple songs about licking holes but first let's rewind
a bit to try to explain why born in 1756 Mozart was one of the earliest examples of a child prodigy he excelled in both piano and violin and was composing and performing in front of royalty at the age of five for context my greatest accomplishment at the age of five was putting on my Crocs all by myself but Mozart was out there playing the piano in front of the kings and queens of Europe pretty much the same thing if you ask me but anyway anyways at the age of 17 he became an official musician of
the salsburg court in the Holy Roman Empire where he composed some of his most critically acclaimed masterpieces now I'm telling you all of this because there's this modern-day theory that child stars stop mentally maturing at the age they become famous and this may have been the case for Mozart as well as he was very into things like butts and poop and balls just like your typical kindergartener he thought these things were hilarious in love letters to his cousin yeah don't ask we find quotes like I wish you good night sh in your bed all your
might and I on your nose so it runs down your chin and you might say well at the peak of his Fame the dude was still a teenager these letters were written when he was in his 20s the guy just loved talking about poop there are at least 40 preserved letters written by Mozart where he talks about pooping or buts or some other weird thing and he didn't just keep it between friends and family he even composed pieces for the general en public to tell everyone that he really liked the most well-known of Mozart's dirty
diddies was the beautiful coral piece for six voices Le M or lick me in the with lyrics that speak to well getting licked in the oh baby here's a snippet from the English translation lick me in the quickly quickly lick me in the quickly now what I find most hilarious about all this is you can actually go and watch videos of serious classical singers dressed up in suits and ties singing lick me in the on YouTube it's almost as if Mozart knew that if he wrote it people would be singing this song about licking holes
for hundreds of years some other translated lyrics from a few other of Mozart's ass focused bangers include stick your to your mouth oh lick me real quick in the and maybe my personal favorite it is difficult to lick my and you said it amadas we've all tried and it is difficult you genius Prodigy you number number two Thomas Edison many people know of Thomas Edison as the genius inventor behind things like the incandescent light bulb the phonograph and the kinetoscope to name a few but not many people know just how power hungry and downright cruel
Edison really was Edison was an ego-driven Cutthroat businessman who went to extreme lengths to make as much money as possible he even went as far as publicly electrocuting animals to try to put his competitors out of business but before that let's start with his accidental creation of Hollywood one of Edison's favorite activities was suing other people when they didn't pay him to use his inventions when he and his partner created the first movie camera and movie projector he opened America's first movie production studio in 1893 dubbed the black Maria in West Orange New Jersey shortly
after opening the black Maria he formed the motion picture patents company a trust nicknamed surprise surprise the Edison trust which contained his production company as well as all of his major competitors who by that time were all on the brink of failure due to constantly being sued by Edison through this trust he then began to sue anyone and everyone who tried to make movies without paying him first because of the sheer amount of patents the trust held it became virtually impossible for anyone to make movies on the East Coast without paying Edison a hefty sum
or getting sued as a result independent filmmakers opted to get as far away from Edison as possible with its cheap land and abundant labor Hollywood California was the best and furthest option and the rest is history so Hollywood essentially was created because independent filmmakers were like I got to get the away from this guy and moved the entire movie industry across the country to do so anyways surprise surprise the Edison trust was shut down in 1915 after losing an Anti-Trust Monopoly court case shocking but speaking of shocking that brings us to our next horrific Edison
story as America industrialized ized there were two competing methods to bring electricity to the masses direct current and alternating current or DC and AC electricity respectively Edison favored and invested heavily into direct current systems where voltage stays constant flowing in a single Direction while Westinghouse a competitor promoted alternating current where the current periodically changes Direction while alternating current proved more effective at transferring electricity over long distances Edison unsurprisingly given his investments in direct current systems claimed it was volatile and far too dangerous to prove this he went to extreme lengths to smear the public perception
of AC electricity Edison began to hold public displays where he would gather a crowd and then electrocute animals with alternating current as a way to demonstrate how dangerous it was Edison fried mostly stray cats and dogs but on one occasion when the Cony Island Zoo decided that they needed to put down an unruly elephant Edison jumped on the opportunity in 1903 in front of a crowd of 1500 people Edison electrocuted Topsy the elephant to prove his point even filming the incident to have it live on forever don't Google it it's messed up ultimately while the
stunt was successful in killing Topsy it did little to stop the growing popularity of alternating current systems and eventually AC electricity became the widespread standard that powers the majority of the world today number three Henry Ford Henry Ford founder of the Ford Motor Company is one of the most influential businessmen in US history but did you know he was also a huge racist who was praised by even Hitler himself goodbye Ford's introduction of the Model T automobile and pioneering of the assembly line technique completely changed the world revolutionizing both manufacturing and transportation in America serving
as the sole owner of his company Ford was one of the richest and most respected men of his time and a shining example of capitalism at its finest however while Ford was a shining example of capitalism he was also the shining example of a huge racist dick starting off Ford's factories practiced your standard racial segregation of the time Ford felt that black people were inherently inferior to whites and his black workers were unable to be promoted or to hold any sort of executive position they usually worked only in the Forge and Foundry of the factories
the most dangerous positions in the company he also publicly supported organizations like the KKK but Ford its treatment of black people pales in comparison to his utter hatred of Jews Ford was a loud and proud anti-semite who invested almost as much energy into creating anti-jewish propaganda as he did Growing his automobile company he believed a racist conspiracy theory that Jews controlled the world's labor unions Banks and media and because of his wealth and success his words held a lot of weight around the world Ford believed that Jewish people were out to get him so much
so that he purchased a struggling newspaper to begin running a weekly series titled the international Jew the world's problem on the paper's front page subtle the international Jew articles were collected into booklets and published in post World War I Germany and heavily influenced many young Germans who saw Ford as a successful and Powerful American there are documented cases of Nazi officials saying that it was Ford's Publications that convinced them that Hitler and the Nazi ideology were right speaking of Hitler he was also a huge fan of Ford's work and even mentioned him by name in
comp as a single great man Hitler was known to keep a photo of Ford as well as copies of the international Jew in his office for inspiration in 1938 Germany awarded Ford the Grand Cross of the German eagle the highest Nazi award that can be given to anyone not of German descent which he happily accepted Henry Ford died in 1947 taking his anti-semitic beliefs with him and in 2014 Ford Motor Company appointed its first Jewish CEO in markfield number four Alexander the Great Alexander the Great is widely recognized as one of History's Greatest and most
accomplished military commanders and warriors but what most people don't know is that once he got so drunk during a banquet that he ended up killing one of his best friends oh no after taking the throne at the age of 20 following the assassination of his father Philip II Alexander spent the majority of his Reign successfully conducting large-scale military campaigns throughout Asia and Egypt and by the time he was 30 Alexander had accumulated not only a super legit KDA but also one of the largest empires in the history of the world stretching from Greece to Northwestern
India but who was this friend he killed and why well Cletus the black was an officer who initially served as an army Commander under Philip II a position that he retained when Alexander took the throne he was a trusted military adviser and in the Battle of granicus in 334 BCE as Alexander was being assailed by two Persian Warriors Cletus saved the King by severing the arm of one of the Persians before the enemy could deliver the killing blow by all accounts Cletus was an extremely valuable asset and a good friend to Alexander But ultimately not
enough of a friend to you know not murder in 328 BCE Alexander was holding a banquet and it was during this banquet that he and Cletus got into a heated argument which ultimately turned deadly while the particulars of the knight's events vary from author to author what all sources agree on is that both men were extremely drunk that night Alexander announced a reorganization of his military commands and Cletus specifically got the short end of the stick when he was ordered to lead a group of 16,000 defeated mercenaries to Central Asia which he viewed as a
massive demotion he would go from commanding one of the most revered cavalries in the world to Leading a group of losers into the middle of nowhere he called BS and then things got wild Cletus began voicing his opposition to the plan which began to to upset Alexander then Cletus added fuel to the fire by claiming that Alexander was not the legitimate King and that all of his achievements were only made possible by his father the slain Philip II sick burn anyways some back and forth and a few more insults from Cletus Alexander got so pissed
he threw an Apple at cletus's head and demanded a dagger or spear the guards not wanting to get in the middle of a fight between their Emperor and his well-respected friend escorted Cletus out of the room and that was that until somehow Cletus drunkenly made his way back into the room loudly shouting a second course of insults he had come up with Alexander who remember at this point was also still drunk and pissed decided that he had heard enough and grabbed a nearby Javelin and threw it directly through cletus's heart most records show that Alexander
regretted this incident immediately and grieved for Cletus afterwards waking up to a drunk text you sent to your ex during a blackout is one thing but what about waking up to having drunkenly murdered your friend with a javelin Cletus had been a commander in service to the crown since before Alexander even took the throne not to mention he had saved him from certain death a number of years before alas once a javelin goes through the heart there are generally no takebackspace weather Lewis and his best bro William Clark along with a small crew on a
multi-year mission to find a trade route through the newly acquired Western Front among the crew was just one African-American Clark's personal slave York who was instrumental in the ultimate success of the Expedition but who was York and what became of him when they returned York was born enslaved and had been in service to Clark's family for almost his entire life he was around the same age as Clark himself so naturally he was designated as Clark's personal slave when when they were both children the two grew up together learned valuable outdoor skills and grew a deep
but complicated Bond when Clark received the call from Lewis about the Expedition he decided to bring York along as His companion during the Expedition York diligently stayed by his master side throughout the entire ordeal he Faithfully worked hunted fought and traveled with Clark and his men for the whole three-year Journey his contributions went far beyond that of a general laborer York helped Lewis and Clark deal peacefully with Native tribes after the group had botched their first few interactions with the Native Americans the tribes would be more at ease seeing a man with dark skin traveling
with the party and eventually when Lewis and Clark encountered a native group the elders would instinctively begin talking with York first as if he was the leader now before you start typing in the comments yes the introduction of sakaa to the party obviously made native relations easier as well but she did not have contact with the Expedition until the group had already been traveling for 9 months so cool your jets Clark even wrote about York's value to the party in his own personal writings saying that York astonished the natives they encountered as the journey progressed
so too did York standing within the group he was also allowed to hunt with a rifle which slaves were not allowed to touch at the time and even gained voting rights amongst the crew when decisions needed to be made with this newfound acceptance York began to see himself in a new light as through his actions he slowly gained the respect of everyone in the crew well everyone except Clark that is after the successful completion of their expedition York newly empowered by what was undoubtedly a life-changing Journey asked his master for Freedom Clark however despite all
they had been through said no and became frustrated that York even asked for such a thing which I guess is not surprising given the times but still seems extra cruel considering he treated York like an equal for 3 years when it benefited him only to act like nothing had changed when they returned every other member of the expedition was handsomely paid with money or land but York as a slave received nothing when York continued asking for his freedom Clark grew angry and had him whipped and then sent away to a harsher slave owner as punishment
there are some reports that Clark eventually did free York years later but whether or not this is true or simply historical whitewashing we'll never [Music] know
