the century of the hoax we hanky-panky-men have always been with you that's a fact what's new are they the experts the experts the so-called experts experts are the new oracles who are greatly pretentious they speak to us with the absolute authority of the computer pretend to know something what they only know very superficially and we bow down before them they're god's own gift to the faker all the world loves to see the experts and the establishment made a fool of let's say we could find a modigliani made by kisly a modeliani and juan modigliani by
modiliary it could be anyone from canoodler to pearls or any of the great ones who consider themselves great and experienced and if any of them recognize which one is we and if the lawyers would just let us we could name you one highly respected museum which boasts of an important collection of post impressionists every single one of which was painted by elmer as the great faker of the 20th century becomes a modern folk hero for the rest of us who have a bit of lost in ourselves but simply don't have the courage or the opportunity
to to to express it when you wrote this biography you don't think you have been a little hard on him some people even said after i did read the book of clifford irving about you i like you even more than before you explode that the myth of the infallibility of the art dealers and museum directors and that you expose their crookedness their evilness and viciousness i went around to the art galleries not with my book but with a catalog which included a great many paintings that had been sold over the past few years in this
catalog was this modular which is a modularity by almir he worked very little he died very early so if they added to a few paintings or few drugs it's not going to destroy his earth i would say this is a fake and the art gallery owner would say well yes of course i mean you can see it's a fake because modulariani would never have drawn the line of the arm parallel to the line of the dress that way and the background is very badly done and the signature isn't right in the next gallery i would
show them this modularity in the catalog and say that's a genuine modulani yes and they would look at it and say well yes you can see it's one of his finest murayanis it's a portrait of mademoiselle bhutan and we know it very well and it's reproduced everywhere after that i i must say i lost my faith in the concept of of expertise i don't feel bad for modigliani uh i feel good for me [Music] you name him he paints him you'll do your doofy van dungeon brock vlamink would you like a nice matisse many of
these drawings are very weak but this line were never that sure was mine he was hesitant and he made a drawing you know he added to it a little more and a little more it wasn't as flowing it wasn't as sure as mine i had to hesitate to make it more matisse like hello i would like to see any expert or any museum director or any art dealer would know which one is a matisse and which one is by elmer and i am ready to accept the challenge one nod from an expert and that piece
of canvas would be worth maybe a couple of hundred thousand dollars and now with your permission a bit of this by kipling when first the flush of a newborn sun fell on the green and growled our father adam sat under the tree and scratched with a stick in the mold the first rude sketch that the world had seen was joy to his mighty heart till the devil whispered behind the leaves it's pretty but is it art it's pretty but is it odd well how is it valued the value depends on opinion opinion depends on the
experts a faker like elmer makes fools of the experts so who's the expert who's the faker i know one thing i never offered a painting or a drawing to a museum who didn't buy it that never refused one never what's he up till now this this isn't a forgery no not this time this is a portrait by elmer of another famous art forger michelangelo michelangelo well that's a sign i must say i'm honored my signature forged by elmer on a real elmer is really something you know art forgery used to be admired as an art
and though michelangelo even used smoke on some of his fakes to antique them like some of the rest of us he finally went straight elmer reformed and exposed in the reverse order was still just recently the island's number one celebrity but now the crown has passed from the old emperor of the hoax to the pretender tomorrow the ex-grand master of fakery
