have you ever been in a situation where it feels like things are taking a step forward but then things take three steps back are you feeling confused when you're promised outings gifts dates but none of them happen my friend you may be experiencing future faking let's explore what that is and how you can spot the signs to avoid this red flag all together future faking funny business future faking is when that person is making a bunch of future plans but they never seem to come to fruition psychologist and researcher Alyssa Roberts says it's a way
for some people to keep others hooked Without Really committing to anything there are many reasons why someone might future fake while we never want to attempt to diagnose or label anyone people can future fake due to personality disorders to avoid breaking up with someone to avoid getting serious or even to speed up intimacy it doesn't always sound the same future faking doesn't always look or sound the same depending on the person the situation and the plan they're trying to avoid here are a couple ways someone might be future faking sign number one we've already mentioned
the first method and that's just simply never following through let's say you love new restaurants and are quite the foodie your person may say that they're going to surprise you with dinner at a new restaurant in town when your birthday rolls around you ask what they have planned but they say nothing particular whatever you want sign number two another method is changing up the plans or changing them at the last minute let's take that same example of your birthday your person says they're surprising you with dinner at a new restaurant instead of pretending like that
conversation never happened they might say ooh actually I was thinking we'd go to the beach walk around and grab some food there you're happy that you're still doing something for your birthday but slightly disappointed that it wasn't what you were promised sign number three another and more dramatic way of future faking is by dangling marriage in front of your partner this method is typically used whenever the future Faker May be at risk of being broken up with or if their partner is asking for a higher level of commitment the awful thing is that now you're
expecting a proposal or at least believing your partner is thinking about marriage when they aren't sign number four remember what love bombing is this is yet another way of future faking one of our writers went through a divorce recently she told us that she and her husband had a bucket list that they started within the first 3 months of their relationship including all sorts of wonderful things like restaurants to try riding a motorcycle together and more after the divorce she realized something none of those things ever happened he had made Mr and Mrs comments and
even talked about promise rings but when an actual engagement ring was on her finger all this romance had disappeared sure they got married but where was the rest sign number five have you ever been on the hook for someone what's on the hook just another future faking strategy let's say you're crushing on someone at work hard you decide the the worst they can say is no so you finally work up the nerve to say something to them you say something like hey Logan look I don't do this a lot but I really like you I'd
like to go on a date and see where things go they say wow you're really awesome and I'd love to hang out I just can't right now and there it is the magic phrase right now if someone is telling you how much they want to be with you but can't right now this sets your expectation that you two will be together when all obstacles have cleared however the person doing the excuse making rather future faking has no intention of being with you ever have you experienced any of these situations are there any other ways someone
can be future faking let us know in the comments below how do I protect myself the most important thing about future faking is there needs to be a pattern a pattern isn't once or twice every blue moon we are human and allowed Grace and room to make mistakes however there's a big difference between forgetting a date or plans once in a blue moon and forgetting changing or putting off all future plans once you see the pattern forming it's time to talk to them it's very important that this is a calm conversation without accusations and that
both of you are open to the conversation it may be helpful to schedule the conversation to make sure you are both in the right head space to ensure you're not accusatory you might say something like when you change or forget about plans you've made with me it makes me feel then you finish if you feel like you're not getting direct answers you can also ask more direct questions like did you intentionally cancel plans or do you realize how I might feel when you forget or cancel plans it is important to always redirect the conversation if
you feel it is getting more hypothetical than solution based in this conversation it is important to set boundaries and make it clear that the words aren't what mean something to you it's the follow through behind the words after an honest conversation see what happens if things don't change or the conversation never happened it's time to evaluate this relationship it can feel incredible to have someone telling you all of the adventures you'll go on together and the fun you'll have but how good does it feel waiting for those promises to become reality you deserve to have
Promises Kept you are worthy of that don't fall for a future Faker are there any other dating red flags we should do a video on comment below and don't forget to like And subscribe we're almost at 12 million help us get there
