there was no one in this earth that does not experience some form of anxiety fear insecurity sometimes it's mild sometimes it's more extreme because life life is filled with challenges some of them difficult challenges some go back to our childhoods but everyone has at some point in their life a time that they have to deal with it could be dealing with a loss with a trauma a present one or a past one it's a tragedy could be dealing with the inner demons the psychological demons do to our own pathology or history the list goes on you can fill in the blank whatever you feel is the thing you're struggling with that's what we're going to be addressing but first thing is to know that we're not alone this is part of the human condition but more importantly that there is a strategy there is a formula to deal with it and it's actually this is the season for that formula called the Passover season Passover literally means to pass over to transcend our challenges to transcend our difficulties but it's not just ignoring it or escaping from it or running away or denying it it's actually freeing ourselves from it and indeed it's a formula that goes back 3 300. in 34 years back to the time when the Exodus from Egypt took place and The Exodus was far more than just a physical Exodus as we read in the story of the Haggadah of Passover Seder in and based on of course the biblical story it's actually a spiritual Exodus and a psychological and emotional one even more importantly because you can leave prison and still be trapped in your mind in your heart in your fears the true Exodus is when your spirit is freed so what is the method what is the way to experience it and how can we apply that to our personal lives no matter what situation we may be in that's what we want to address here so I want to break it down into a few components and actually if you're going to be doing a sailor and I definitely encourage you to do so the Seder is a 15-step plan towards this type of Freedom toward Transcendence and in previous years and we have online at meaningful life. com you can find the entire seder broken down in those 15 Steps I did actually two years ago during covet I when covert just began I did a 15-step video musical with a musical uh Dimension to it of each of these steps of how each step helps us get to a deeper place and I went through also the different components of the sailors I don't want to do a full seder right now I do however want to focus on three four themes that are essential to that formula that helps us get through our anxieties now the first thing we have to always remember that we can be Our Own Worst Enemy our blind spots our biases our prejudices are minimizing our denial so when you're dealing with a problem it's not just the problem per se it would be one thing if you have a broken clock and you sit down either you or a technician or someone knows what to do they look at it they diagnose it and they fix it the clock is going to cooperate because the clock doesn't have any will of its own to resist your your your repairing it but imagine the clock spoke back to you or the clock had its own resistance that's the situation when we're dealing with our own challenges because of the psychological emotional effects it has on us it's not that very predictable it's not like okay there's a problem let me get it fixed the problem gets compounded by the fact that it's our own problem and we're blinded by it and if you don't address that you keep going in circles like this is the this I think einsteiner was that said that you cannot fix us a a cannot fix a problem from within the system where the problem was created you need to go outside of the system so essentially Passover in general and the psychological first step in this formula is to be able to separate yourself and say Here's an issue let me Define it and I'm not going to allow my biases on my blind spots to affect it now it's easier said than done but that's the first most important thing is to be the awareness of an issue and as much as possible and that's why we need friends a mentor or someone that can help us look at it somewhat objectively I say somewhat because it's impossible for a person to see themselves entirely objectively but at least be aware of that remember we cannot become suddenly transform ourselves from subjective creatures to objective ones but you can be aware of your subjectivity and be anticipate blind spots resistance denials minimizing and so on and this is vital in any Journey the journey is called Integrity it's called sincerity it's called honesty being honest with yourself so if it's any experience that you're going through whether it's a fear whether it's a form of Shame listen Shame by definition is such that you're ashamed to be ashamed that's what shame is which in itself becomes the issue because you don't want to acknowledge it or you don't want to really really face it because very that's part of what shame is all about but shame is so much part of abuse and hurt and Trauma that we have to in some way look at it so essentially the first step is and this is why the Seder begins with Kadesh which means kadish literally means to sanctify to make a blessing unwind it's a form of sanctification but it also means to separate from it's like everything anything that you've been doing yesterday Start Anew I'm going to start a new it's like a new a new of a clean slate now it's not a completely clean State obviously emotionally because we still carry the baggage but in your mind at least say you know what for now I'm gonna put think of myself as like a new person and this is vital in any form of healing it's the first step towards to any type of cure is awareness and looking at things in that sense so that's step number one in this formula and that's why there is a Passover seder you know people ask why are we remembering what happened 3 304 years ago in a uh different land in a different country in ancient time because we're meant to relive it and we're meant to be aware of it in each generation that talmud says we need to relive and recreate The Exodus from Egypt what does that mean it doesn't mean the physical it means the concept mitzrayim Egypt in Hebrew means constraints that's the blank I was referring to it means everything that you're trying to deal with so I would begin and identify what are the issues you want to deal with or one issue or several and then think of it that here we have a night we have a day where we can use this time this energy of this time to focus and say okay I'm going to focus on this I know I have power and I'm going to recreate both my challenge but most importantly The Exodus from it so the first Exodus is not being defined by it and not being shaped by it which means being aware that it's there that leads me to point number two which is not being shaped and not defined I know I just jumped the gun for a moment the next thing you need to know that you are not your problems in other words your problems don't Define you your problems are part of your life the circumstances of your life but you are not defined by it you are fundamentally a pure soul a free Soul a free spirit that may have been trapped well not just may have been we're all trapped in some way in our physical bodies or the way it's putting the Tanya in our animal souls and in the physical world with all types of Temptations and distractions that seduce us and then and they grasp this in their tentacles and distract us from where we should be once you can identify that and separate yourself I mentioned before separation so really it consists of two components one is separate one is recognizing what it is and identifying it and not just allowing your subjectivity to Cloud it recognizing that you may be blinded that you may be sometimes Your Own Worst Enemy and secondly to know that you are not defined by it when the people left Egypt the challenge the big challenge was that they psychologically were trapped they did not feel just not just the oppression and the Affliction and the slavery and the bondage in their minds they felt they're not Free People it couldn't they could not it says they couldn't even listen to Moses because of their shortness of breath and the difficult work because when you're overwhelmed you can't hear things you can't see things clearly so the critical component was that Moses convinced them in a positive way your time of redemption has come you are really free people and when your mind and your heart and soul you know that then the rest follows obviously you still have to deal with adversity you have to deal with your captors or you deal with your oppressors which was also dealt with but the first thing you need to know that you can win this battle there was a custom in olden times I'm not sure which armies because they marched out to war even before the first battle they would sing a song of victory now they didn't even begin battling but it was the confidence you see it today it's replicated in every game look at a football game of baseball you see how the coach the teams they hype each other up they haven't even begun because you need to have the psychological wherewithal psychological confidence and positive thinking the psychological confidence and positive thinking that you could win and if you don't have that even if you have the stronger Army or more weapons [Music] you may lose and you will lose because psychologically your opponent may be weaker than you but psychologically they can beat you and if you don't think you don't have that confidence then that is a big problem you need to know that there's hope and that is defined by recognizing that you're not and that's determined by recognizing that you're not defined by what has happened to you so let's say you experience serious trauma as a child some form of abuse let's say you have deep shame inside of you you have other fears that are a result of that play itself out in your life as you may know better than anybody else does you are not that person that is part of your behavior it's part of your modus operandi presently but it's not does not define you critical point so that's Point number two after the first one of identifying the issue and somewhat recognizing that you may be blinded and subjective and therefore may be contributing to the problem so step number two you're not defined by it that is actually the secret to all resilience the people that go through difficulties in life and we're talking about Holocaust and losses and deaths and tragedies so you'll see two people went through exactly the same thing and one falls apart and the other is stronger in the broken places how's that is it purely their genetic DNA is their genetic makeup in their DNA there may be some of that but more importantly it's this issue you will always see that the person was able to rise to dig deeper to ride through the waves the storms the Raging Waves is the one that does not feel they're defined by what has happened to them so they have something to hold on to like a life raft that gives them that ability yes terrible thing has happened I'm talking about even in the worst case scenarios definitely milder situations but it's not me and therefore the me remains intact as soon as you think you are your problem that the tragedy is you so besides the fact that you first blame yourself and say look I'm way I'm I'm damaged goods nobody want love me nobody cares about me I'm not I'm worthless that's obviously a tremendous part of the problem but in addition to that you have nothing to hold on to because you feel you are the issue whereas if you know there's a me and there's what happened to me that's very different then the me may still be submerged and may be difficult to access but at least you have hope in accessing it so that's message number two in this 3334th year 3 300 and what is it 34-year formula of of Passover to remember this idea that you are not defined by it that you are a free person and you can talk about the trauma you can talk about the past you can talk about the the bondage the slavery in the context of Egypt or any other of the experiences and fears and other stuff that has happened to us that causes us to be inhibited or not to be able to really express ourselves completely so that's number this number uh what do we say number two so the the number three point is Passover is all about questions you see it's built around questions the children are encouraged to ask questions things are done to provoke the children to ask questions why is that so important to ask questions and it's not just to create a dialogue and engaging it's deeper than that because questions is the ultimate expression of Freedom the freedom of expression free speech as you see in the Declaration of Independence and Bill of Rights it goes back all the way to Passover pesach the Hebrew word for Passover means a speaking mouth you are allowed not only allowed you're encouraged you're actually obligated to ask questions asking questions means you're allowed to express yourself what is one of the worst parts of shame that is a result of any form of hurt in life you're silenced you can't speak because you're told who are you to say anything nothing happened the silence they say is worse than the crime or more graphically put the silence is worse than the rape because it's one thing to be violated and to be hurt so at least you could cry out in protest in pain but if you're told you can't cry smile there are pictures to be taken what do you think happens that means you're being invalidated your very pain is being invalidated far worse than the original pain so we're told Express Yourself Magid is the main bulk the fifth step in the 15 Steps of the haggad of the Seder which is the name hagoda Magid means to relate how God that means the relating of the story We Tell we talk not only do we we can we talk we should talk we must talk and talking means obviously asking questions being curious knowing that you will not be silenced or shut down now obviously there's a healthy way to ask questions some people ask questions just ask questions to justify their position not because they want answers here we're talking about questions as part of a journey toward freedom and that's why you'll see any free Society the first thing is a freedom of expression I don't know if this applies today but Thomas Jefferson said if he had to choose between free speech and a free press he would use free Free Press because without a free press you won't have freedom of speech some people question whether there is a Free Press today but that's another discussion and that's why you also see on the the on the other side of the coin the other end of the spectrum what is a fascist regime a totalitarian regime any dictator comes to power the first thing they do is they have to silence their enemies they have to silence their opponents they have to mind control propaganda controlling the airwaves controlling the flow of information why because any question is a threat you can be challenged that's why you'll see these regimes will establish immediately a bureau of Truth and information rest assured if you hear about a bureau of truth truth and information you can know it's neither true nor information because truth and information should be coming from all of us to ask fine we go to intelligent people to objective people to Scholars to people who are experienced the seasoned individuals Pravda which is the Russian newspaper the Communist newspaper you know Prophet means truth as a matter of fact the Yiddish communist newspaper for many years was called Ms truth would you trust the newspaper that calls itself the truth here's the truth some say the word Ms in Hebrew is written in Hebrew Yiddish aleph memsaf the newspaper actually spelled that Iron Man if you're familiar with the Hebrew that's a complete misspelling it's pronounced that way some say because the editor was trying to hint to the readers that don't think this is true even the name is misspelled and my grandfather used to tell me he was he was from Russia he said to me my father was happy to be a journalist but my father grandfather was like somewhat uh somewhat uh skeptic uh Sinister cynical about me about journalism he said to me everything in the newspaper is a lie so I said Grandpa come on please this is America Free Press she says everything's a lie and you'll see when you grad older it's like even the date on the newspaper is a lie it was printed the night before interesting insight that's an aside let's get back to our discussion here so we see asking questions communicating finding someone to speak to and finding the right people who will listen to you and won't criticize and won't judge and won't be condescending and won't be patronizing so that's step number three so we have so far three steps one is understanding your subjectivity and blind spots and somewhat separating yourself from the experience that you're dealing with your mitzrayim your shame your fear your anxiety your trauma whatever it may be the Second Step was knowing that you're not defined by it and the third step is you are allowed to ask and this actually reinforces Point number two because once you're allowed to speak then you can say one second something was done to me something hurt me someone hurt me and that alone is already separating you the one that's questioning or crying out or protesting against any form of violation or any form of hurt or pain that alone reinforces the fact that you are not it when you're silenced it's basically saying swallow it it's that's who you are and shut up and actually nothing happens something's wrong with you something's wrong with your perception as people have I mean I can't tell you how many people have told me that's what I was told I was hurt and I was told you're the problem you're making it up couldn't have happened because it was caused very convenient for those the perpetrator or the those that covered up the perpetrator that's why the cover-up the silence is so terrible and that's why speaking is so vital there's a verse that the talmud explains it says if a person is anxious so the Hebrew word for the response to that is the talmud says can be interpreted in two ways one means to speak about from the word speak like hagoda like Magid speak about it the second is with a samach who it's a different translation it means to distract yourself so one of the great classic Mystics the fourth Chabad ask the question seems to contradict the two interpretations to speak about it is the opposite of distracting yourself and thinking about something else he says no when you speak about it you release it release it it's freedom and when you release it you don't obsess over it how many things we obsess over within ourselves someone said something to us we're insulted or past Grievances and so on and you carry it and it ties you up in knots and you're consumed with it you can nightmares and you just can't get rid of it when you speak it's a way of freeing yourself so that's the step number three the in this formula that we're discussing number four we eat mats on Passover you know what matzo represents one word Bittle a word I've introduced many times in these classes it's a Hebrew word but I'll translate it it's hard to fully capture in one word but it's a combination of humility modesty but the best expression I like to use for this is the suspension of self not just suspension of Self in absorbing something greater than yourself is the ultimate form of transcendence what is the what is the the alter ego if you wish or the diametric opposite of Bittle me and nothing else I'm the center of the universe everything is about me yes sometimes you'll give something because you get something in return but it's all about me Bittle is the opposite it's not about me it's about what is greater than I am is the ultimate experience of Freedom even though it sounds counterintuitive you know what if I'm not going to take care of myself who will take care of me no but the truly free people and the truly happy people recognize that they are here to serve a higher cause whatever that causes I'm not dispelling it out right now but it's not man-made and it's not about you and that makes you paradoxically greater than when you're just focus on yourself because you're only as great as you can be and that's always going to have a limitation but if you connect yourself to a cause that's Eternal that's infinite that's the dedicated to spreading goodness and kindness bringing light to this world then you become an extension of that and that's tremendously empowering one of the saddest things that brings one to tears when you hear about children who've been hurt about any of the mids Rhymes we're talking about that we're trying to free ourselves in this Exodus tragedy Exodus strategy strategy is that we are not allowed we were hurt and it's so-called our flower began to close up like literally in a uh like like in a fetal position where you curl up in your fears and you can't spread your wings and soar and be yourself and really Express the true you so what happens is that you become very trapped in that little corner that you've been placed that's the ultimate enslavement not being able to be yourself the fullest sense of yourself so interestingly Bittle the ability to free yourself from your own experiences is the key to Ultimate Transcendence and that's what matzah represents matzah is like a thin cracker it's flour on water just like bread but bread is not allowed on Passover why not because bread is hummus leavened bread which means that it's the yeast and and it inflates it represents ego self and matzo represents the minimal just spread just flour on water that is not allowed to inflate and rise and as a result it captures and personifies the concept of this suspension of self which is so vital to Freedom now after Passover and before pastor we do eat bread because an ego is not a goal is not to destroy the ego the goal is to sublimate it to harness it so the seven eight days of Passover seven in Israel outside of Israel it's eight days we eat matzah that symbolizes this idea but let's talk about the psychological aspect of it it's recognizing that there's something greater than you are and that you have the blessing and the gift to be part of it now if you think about it going back to the three previous steps you'll see it's an extension we began by first recognizing that you may be blinded secondly you're not defined by your traumas and your negative experiences and by your suffering and pain that doesn't Define you you may have suffered but you're not a sufferer number three is the concept that we spoke about being able to speak to breathe to be able to open up about it and now we talk about Transcendence actually experiencing something greater than you are so one of the most important things to remember and it is counter-intuitive again that when you feeling locked and trapped the best thing you could do is not to curl up in bed not isolate yourself and in your own lonely place but actually to go out and help somebody even if you're not in the mood because that is the ultimate expression of transcendence don't allow your mood your feelings your the demoralization to control you now that's not always going to be easy to do that's why it's important to commit either to volunteer to some volunteer make sure it's locked in every Monday every Tuesday whenever it is you're committed to doing so and so so you can't get out of it that again paradoxically will help free you from your very own sadness and demoralization whatever experience you've had is causing you to have so that's number four the concept of Bittle but then we also drink wine on Passover so wine is like the other side of things wine is not just water it's a rich drink it's a drink of royalty and a Passover night was supposed to be like Royal we're not just former slaves just freeing ourselves and just getting out of prison we're Kings because as I said we're free spirits free spirits that have been trapped and are trapped in some way in this material world but that's not that our definition that's not Who We Are so we drink wine that expresses that royalty that expresses a certain openness of heart and soul which wine does says as the wine enters your side the inner dimension of you is expressed now we're not talking God forbid intoxication or any excess excessive drinking and those that have issue with drinking there are guidelines of how to do that on Passover it's the symbolism that I'm discussing here the significance of it the expansiveness of it because on one hand matzah alone okay fine I will be humble and modest and suspend myself in something greater but then you express that greatness in your life you're drawing it down it's not just you're subjugating yourself you're drawing it back and now drink like a king like a queen and know that you deserve everything in this world because you were created in the Divine image and you fundamentally a free spirit your soul is free nobody can enslave your soul accept yourself people can do things that can enslave you psychologically emotionally as we discussed But ultimately nobody can really control you which is so much that central theme of Passover so we talked about five key components in this formula and this 3 300 and 3 000 334 year formula of The Exodus strategy now there's no doubt this is going on for over three Millennium that when a person employs these methods and this formula it will work now there's no magic pill nothing works just overnight quickly it's a really an approach and this approach is meant to be not just one night or two nights of the Seder but it's meant to spill over that you can integrated into your life all the time which means every day you should be focusing on these five components this is the true formula for total healing and healing means that you don't you can't erase your past but you can transform it you can harness it and that's ultimately what the Passover teaches us that that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger that which didn't hurt us makes us more powerful and it's actually a verse in the book of Exodus right the beginning as they were oppressed in direct proportion to their Affliction and oppression they thrived and they flourished because that tells you the answer to all recovery it's not just getting back to square one it's not just damage control no it's harnessing it's transforming it's using it as a springboard that whatever you've learned in your darkest moments whatever you learned in those difficult places in life will ultimately become the ingredients think of it like the tears that become the moisture that feeds and nourishes your growth and makes you into a far greater person that's the ultimate goal in this whole process so these five steps are all meant and I five steps as I said them 15 Steps of the Sailor I'm not replacing them I just wanted to sum it up in more in more let's call it more um actionable terms that each of us can really employ if you wanted more detail obviously please go to meaningful life.
com you can see the 15 Steps and more detail and so on but I would begin with these five key thoughts and ideas and actually methodologies what I would really call them and that will definitely create the Transcendent Passover experience but not just for the seven eight days of Passover but really forever it's meant to set things in motion because all these energies extend and continue to the rest of our lives so it's time my friends to each one of us to finally become free yes after all what we've gone through each of us in our own way and everybody knows what their own experiences are like it's time to be free and you have the right and you have the gift and no one should ever be able to know should ever convince you otherwise never accept someone telling you not too late for you who do you think you are you're too old no there's no such thing the spirit the soul does not age does not die even it continues to get more vibrant but we have to access it it's right there inside of you I always I'm fond of Michelangelo's response when he was asked how do you sculpt those beautiful angels in the marble and his response was I see the Angels trapped in the marble and I carved and carved and set them free set them free the angels are within you the song is within you the flowers are within you the beauty that free spirit is within you right now you must know that and you must surround yourself with people who confirm and affirm that and validate that and encourage you instead of the opposite and by following the steps we discussed we'll definitely assure and help you get these higher greater places so everyone should have a very very freeing and Transcendent Passover freeing and Transcendent life be the you that you were created to be you were born an original don't become a copy and even let where's that in a copy just a product or even a victim of someone else's version or vision of what you should be you have the capacity literally to become something that is unbelievable Eternal and infinite and Manifest this in your life thank you so much everyone have a very happy holiday this has been Simon Jacobson meaningful Life Center meaning for life. com where you can find this and many other programs many other programs we also on YouTube and Facebook and all the different social media platforms please benefit take advantage of our robust schedule of activities as well as different programs video audio text and I'd love to hear your feedback and your thoughts and your comments and suggestions and as of course share with others at the end of the day the greatest gift is to share to pay it forward if something touches you make sure that you share it with another the goal is to create a ripple effect that ultimately transforms the butterfly effect that transforms existence itself and creates a Transcendent World starting with a world of microcosm yourself thank you so much this program is brought to you by the meaningful Life Center please help us continue our programs make even a small contribution at meaningfullife.
