Nam Budd welcome to another video sometimes no matter how many people are around us we feel we're the only person that living in this world we feel lonely we feel left out loneliness can be dangerous if we did not know how to handle it but one thing that we don't realize is the same loneliness that is killing us the same loneliness that disturbs us can be changed into a blessing in life always remember every Challenge and every difficult situation that comes into your life can be changed into a blessing if you know how to handle
it so from this video let's talk about how can we deal with the loneliness in life and how can we change this loneliness to a blessing in our life to deal with loneliness first of all we need to understand what is the reason behind the loneliness now so many people think that the loneliness or the suffering that you feel depends on other people right depends on an outer Source when people leave you when when you are separated from your loved ones you feel lonely but that is not always case because even in the middle of
relationships even when you're being with other people even when you're being with your family members you might feel lonely because the loneliness does not occur because of other people or an outer Source loneliness occurs when your interactions with other people does not match your desires or does not match your expectations and that expectation creates the vacuum of that missingness in life and that creates the suffering so the Buddha says that the loneliness or this suffering does not depend on an outer Source but also it depends on an inner problem so the Buddha mentions this in
dhap verse 338 the Buddha says just as a tree though cut down Sprouts up again if its root remain uncut and firm even so until the craving that lies dant is rooted out suffering Sprints up again and again so Buddha refers this to a tree right if a person comes to a tree and he needs to remove the tree so what he does is he cut down the tree from the trunk okay no matter how many times you cut down the tree from the trunk it will grow back because what is the reason because the
root system is there still as long as the root system is rooted on the ground in the ground the tree will grow back again and again so the Buddha says as long as the reason or the root cause for suffering is there the suffering will spring up again and again so what we have done in our whole life is trying to kill loneliness but not the reason for the loneliness right so first of all we need to understand that keeping your happiness keeping your total happiness on other people and expecting other people to be around
you totally and expecting other people to live up to your expect expectations is not going to happen all the time and that creates the suffering and that creates the loneliness so one thing that we need to understand is that loneliness does not always depend on an Outsource it depends on the cravings and the desires and the expectations that we are holding on to the interactions with other people okay so luckily because of this we can change and we can convert this loneliness to a blessing okay so how to do this first of all we need
to change the perspective that we are holding onto the loneliness so let me tell you a story about this in the Buddhist time before his Enlightenment he was practicing a practice called self mortification in this time there were five monks who were helping to the Buddha now these five monks had lot of expectations on the Buddha that one one day he will become enlightened and we will be also able to listen to his teachings and be enlightened so he was practicing that and they believe that the self mortification or giving a lot of suffering to
the body is the only way to find The Liberation but alas one day the Buddha gave up this practice of self-mortification after practicing it for long time bu Buddha gave up this practice by by understanding that this is no longer going to help him and now all the expectations were destroyed and these five monks were disappointed about the Buddha so what they did they left the Buddha and they went to wari and what happens to the Buddha was Buddha was all alone in the middle of the Jungle he was abandoned but here's the thing he
was not lonely he was alone but he was not lonely why because that loneliness that silence and that not being with around other people gave him the time to focus more into himself right so one thing that we need to understand is that when we feel lonely it is an opportunity for us to focus on ourself right it is a better time for you to focus on other people because most of the time when we are too much around other people we don't get much time to be with our ourselves be in our own company
so one thing that we need to understand is that loneliness creates the time and opportunity for you to focus more on yourself okay so if you hold on to that VI and think that oh now I am lonely and then now I alone but now this is the chance for me to focus on my inner values so that you can build up your inner values inner values and you can care more about yourself and you can focus on your what mistakes that do I have inside my life what should I do and what should I
practice the more you focus onto yourself you can develop and you get the chance to develop your inner habits and good values into you so that it creates a better personality inside you so understand that the loneliness or not being around other people is not always a suffering it is an opportunity for all of you to build up a better life so what you have to do get this time and take this time and take this opportunity for you to be more focused into yourself and to practice this self- love self-compassion and also to build
up good habits in your life if you understand this way of dealing with loneliness the loneliness will become a blessing to your life and one day you will thank for that loneliness because it created who you are today so understand that loneliness does not always depend on other people it always depend on what we you're holding on to this experience in life so be more focused in onto yourself into yourself and create a better life for you Nam buddhaya
