[Music] deep down most people believe that giving more means getting more in return that kindness will bring respect gratitude and loyalty far from the truth think about it you're the one who listens to everyone's problems the one who puts others first hoping they'll see your worth but instead they start treating you like a doormat a safe place to load their problems without giving anything back your kindness hasn't built their resp it's built their expectations most people don't have a clue what being kind actually means they are fooled by an illusion today I will show you
the eight ways people destroy their life while thinking they are kind stay until the end cause the last one might be the most destructive one number one over apologizing you think saying sorry makes you look considerate like you're acknowledging the other person's feelings but constant apologies make you look weak they tell others that you have no confidence in yourself no backbone people start to see you as someone who doesn't know their own value someone who can be pushed and molded instead of apologizing every time you make a small mistake stand firm take responsibility when needed
but don't make every little inconvenience your fault but here is what is even more important number two never saying no you think saying yes all the time makes you dependable and reliable like people will see you as someone they can always count on wrong saying yes to everyone means saying no to yourself people don't respect someone who's always available they respect boundaries learn to say no without guilt because every time you say yes to things you don't want to do you're sacrificing a piece of your self-respect however there is an even bigger misperception when it
comes to being kind number three avoiding Conflict at all costs you think that avoiding conflict makes you a better person like your keeping the peace and preventing unnecessary drama but avoiding conflict doesn't make the problems go away it just postpones them while you're avoiding it resentment builds up inside you like poison face conflict's headon set the tone be clear about your boundaries and don't let others walk over you because you're too afraid to stand up however most people avoiding conflicts at all costs are also doing another crucial mistake number four putting everyone else's needs above
your own do you believe that prioritizing others will show them how valuable you are that they'll appreciate the sacrifice you make for them but here's the hard truth they won't instead of admiring your selflessness they'll get used to it they'll start to expect it and soon your needs and desires will become invisible to them so stop putting everyone else first make yourself a priority it's not selfish it's necessary many people pretend they must neglect their own needs out of moral reasons however in most cases deep down there is another reason number five seeking validation from
others you think if you make others happy they'll give you the recognition you crave but when you seek validation you give others the power to Define your worth they will never see you as you want to be seen because they're not looking for your best self they're looking for what you can do for them stop chasing approval start living for yourself however this goes hand in hand with the next way almost every time number six being a people pleaser you think if you keep everyone happy they'll like you but the reality is people Pleasers are
the ones most easily forgotten when you mold yourself to fit what others want you lose your identity and without a strong sense of self you'll never command respect or admiration people remember those who stand out not those who blend in but it is not only your identity you you are losing number seven being too generous with your time you think giving people your time makes you more likable but if you're always available people take you for granted they expect you to drop everything for them your time is your most valuable resource protect it fiercely set
boundaries and don't let others guilt trip you into giving more than you're willing to because once they know they can take your time without consequences they will never stop and now the number one way people destroy their life while thinking they are kind number eight sacrificing your authenticity you think hiding your true self makes you more likable that if you become the person they want they'll love you but that's the biggest lie of all sacrificing your authenticity doesn't make you likable it makes you invisible when you hide your true self you blend in with the
crowd you lose the essence that makes you unique people don't respect those who hide they respect those who are unapologetically themselves flaws and all so don't be afraid to show your true colors even if they aren't what others want to see the truth is kindness isn't about being liked it's not about being the shoulder everyone cries on the person who's always available or the one who sacrifices everything for others real kindness comes from from strength from knowing your value and not being afraid to show it it's about setting boundaries standing up for yourself and saying
no when you need to because in the end if you lose yourself while trying to be kind you've gained nothing at all so the next time you're about to sacrifice your needs for someone else's remember this kindness is not weakness it's strength disguised as empathy be kind but not at your own expense if you like the video subscribe to the channel don't forget to leave a like as well thanks for watching and see you in the next video [Music]
