Real Talk With Anele S4 E101 Dineo Ranaka & Don't Be A Hoarder

[Music] [Music] together with a number of others when he was accused of plotting the Soweto uprising a charge later dismissed although when he was already banned the police raided her house it happened ever so slightly made about three one morning the cops they broke the door down they took my mother to police station then after a few hours a big truck arrived and they just heard loading things then they took me and the big truck to the police station and my mother was told them that she'd be moved to France with them what just taken

me it was quite shocking meaning without any charge of warning Winnie Mandela had been banished 250 miles from her home in Soweto her place of Exile was Brantford in the Orange Free State I says well once again herbal tea tree service we Derek take we never smoked me you know that hippie Scott winning is really very amazing and there she is banished to Brandfort godforsaken place a place where the Afrikaner I think very little of an African to them and African is someone that is there that has been put in this well to serve them

and work for them so she gets there and she revolutionizes the holy place she revolutionizes the whole place those are the words about one legendary icon mama Winnie Mandela from another Star Wars in another may truck of our nation mama Adelaide tumble may both they souls rest in peace hello and welcome to real talk with me I kneel on this Wednesday evening after a prophetic memorial service today at Orlando Stadium one thing that stood out for me especially as a mother is the countless sacrifices that mom we need had to make as a mother to

her own flesh and blood so she could be there for every other mothers child a selfless leader and a servant in our tribute series today I have crystal de Canada due to mass here to talk about Mama's family legacy her unimaginable courage through her personal struggle and victories later on Tina and I guess also in studio another one another one you know also shows last year and you know she's been busy building her own legacy for her children but first help me welcome prasada back to the show back to the show welcome to my real

house thank you shoulders with you took Nicola and there were mine that thing you know there's a video currently on loop I I think every news agency is running it and it's you looking up to mama Winnie and I think she's wiping it here and she's holding you and she's saying something to you and I know everyone wants to know what is she saying to you well some of the things I can't disclose because you know the world will hold me up to it I can't prove it but what I I can talk about is

the fact that she was saying I'm not ready to go you know when when a figure like my movie me says I'm now ready to go because I take comfort in what you stand for I I love what you represent and continue having a voice and I mean I I just could not stop crying and she was just wiping those tears to say it's okay it's okay and for me each time that clip plays I'm saying that it was preparing me for this moment and these chairs still dropping each time I wipe I remember my

Ma's wits I remember the a common amongst the things she said is that I love the fact that you are passionate about telling our stories once we live and your assignment is finding your Winnie Mandela's and tell their story now that your item tanam go out find them there are so many of them they still alive get this woman's Lea to help you do this if it's the last thing that they do as a legacy so so must be and you know now that you mention that you're right sighs I I mean one of my

favorite books today - stole your book right and and and I go back and I draw such parallels between you and her I mean you walked a good 600 caves and 306 days yeah looking at the seven day yeah looking for your mother yeah as a child yeah you know so when you are privy and you understand that the relationship that mom Winnie had with her daughter's you know do you draw the parallel between your own struggle all I'm looking for a mother and your mother it's interesting that you reflect on that and nearly won

one of the things that I've always asked I'm always asked when you connect with mamuni what's there one thing that you take away when I started talking about my HIV status I received this call and and you know you can never mistaken Mamun is poised for someone else it's it's just exhausting yeah and and this voice that I kept on pinching myself am I dreaming is this for real and then she says to me it's time oh say kaya we need to talk and effort time I mean their attacks weigh just incredible because all I

was simply saying is that we cannot have a viral an immune deficiency causing violence virus and and treat it with toxic medication without teaching people how to look after their well-being and also without food without because any medication says or after million what you are not understanding is that majority of South Africans who have this condition don't have access they are poor they don't understand the value of food so we need to go back to those basics and teach people how to live and the message was distorted two things I mean there would be times

when I collect all these articles and things that are written and and I mean how its analyzed the way I'm such a government multis I get paid to say these things that I'm thinking and then I would question God which why do you expose me to such when you're not going to equip me with the power and then that call comes and mama says that I'm you are enough what you need to know is when when you stand for something yeah there will be noise around you you know coming from her yeah looking at the

at the what they meant yeah it took me to that moment when I eventually got to find my mother when she opens the door I mean and throughout the seven days what I was what was pushing me through that journey what was giving me courage through that journey is her opening the door in saying welcome to me and she opens the door she says a phenomena that defines the leader I become the woman I become the mother I belong because it is the rejected one so for me rejection came as second nature so here's this

figure I mean I have no ways to describe a mom we and she says you are enough you are loved she said it in in the most authentic voice that was saying it's your mother speaking through me saying I Nala fie everything else that I did to you and and she has a moment right here right now I am saying to you you are loved you are doing something great and never ever doubt your voice now that was a voice a tiny little drop in an ocean that was happy that was my life at the

time that gave me so much courage and and for some reason she then says I can see that in your petal as you try and figure out what your papers is you are looking for mothers let me be your mother and and what does she become just that and mom and this is why for me I mean all these memorials and and all the noise right now it's okay for me to take a step back I came here because I respect what you stand for I've refused many interviews because I honor the memories I have

with Mama I don't need a spotlight to say here's what she meant to me because I can never find words that can help me define what she meant to me without even knowing and when she led my book she was like this is what I was feeling this is what I was sensing you needed a mother and I'm so glad that at the time when you needed a mom I was there and and my plea to South Africa is as we carry on with our lives bah-wah that individual was just so hateful full of speights

just think of the sacrifices that those children went through and and we need to do right by mama weenies children do right by them because I look at I mean people say don't they they went and and became ambassadors out of their own accord but I'm saying that while she was alive in trying to fix what was systematically destroyed by the system we still take those children and place them in foreign countries for me it is just saying cxo villosa mamuni over and above the pain that you went through in your last days you'll be

separated once again by us that you fought for by us will separate you from your children so can we do this right for generations to come we saw what mama represents today at the memorial to the grandchildren the great-grandchildren all of them unanimously their voice was distinct that she loved me because that's what momma was about she loved was at you know sometimes her phone so I just feel like she never went out she never known out of love for her it was always about she had just this huge hat whenever you were in her

present she will make you feel like you're the best thing since sliced bread you the only thing that matters at that moment in time and for me all we can do seriously is just to honor her memory by doing right by her children she's given enough for this country given enough for the world for us to really stop these injustice it's just so unfortunate and and said that to date you still find people I mean here's a person who was part of those uh portrayed spies saying the entire team was was placed to vilify mama

to spy on mama and all that was bogus all that was a lie and we're still holding on to that there are people I mean I watched some of these women leaders that whenever they get an opportunity the first thing that comes out is that we love hey we honor her in spite of her faults who's counting using the and who are you a soda I can only society next this was gonna go this way I you know why you at that moment because you can connect what I'm saying to what I've written in that

book you never alone and you connecting the character that is mama and in my writing that book those words was simply about it that let's restore family there's just so much brokenness in our society and had people had others can we not be that generation that continues to saw these divisions these breakups our children are growing in loveless environments for how long should this be with what we know now we know what we know to do better [Music] she is young feisty controversial and for years she's been she has braced our screens airing all a

dirty laundry for all of us to see we've seen her both empires get into physical altercations have her heart broken even her mental health breakdown yet every time she comes back in with a vengeance it is safe to call her the comeback kid in the industry ladies and gentlemen the way you have been on my back about this and finally she's yeah Danelle ronica welcome to real talk thank you thanks very much for having me I appreciate it do you know a fellow by the name of Lance Klusener I know teach me last reason I

was easily one of the bass cricketers we've ever had in this country right but the beauty of lunch krishna was that he if it was time to bowl he would be the best mm-hmm it was time to bet he would be the meanest if it was time to lead he would be the best yeah it was time to bring water to the rest of the team he'd be the best person bringing the water so earlier on social media I called you the L'Anse Creuse mouths broadcast oh wow I didn't even see that really yes oh

my gosh yeah stop because if we're on radio you're good around TV you are kicking ass oh if it's time to be behind the things you are doing well if you are acting you are doing I mean very valiant around you Oh Mina I love what I do I love what I'm called to do I love entertaining I love broadcasting I love learning I just I really love putting myself out there to understand things as they are taught to me and to practice until I don't get it wrong anymore so I'm just I'm like that

it's in my nature I'm an absorber of information yeah you were 19 when you got to five of em right I was I was very young very young and you know there's almost an ocean oh you can't be that young on national radio what are you doing did you go into that with everyone else's doubts of age or did you know I'm here to learn I'm trying to swing I know I'm so innocent in my approach to romance life in general I really don't overthink a lot of things and I I've I've developed a character

over the years from when I was very young in primary school that just shuts out the external world I shut out external voices I'm so good at doing that and I do innocently approach things as I figure things out and I went into it so innocently I went into it so naively I went into it not even knowing what the world of radio hasn't seen me what did he come for me I just know that I was tired of being a receptionist I felt that I was not called for this I was called to use

my voice but not much you know she come back I think I'm pretty good morning anything wrong with being a receptionist at all or one be proud but I felt that was not my call for purpose and duty so when people are calling and you the receptionist you're getting a oh you've got a nice voice I got that all the time I got there all the time and it didn't even register at the time when I went into radio I didn't register that you're doing this because you're told you've got a nice voice I just

thought I want to know where the SABC is I took my last 20 R and I got in a bus at candy square and I say the SABC please the bus driver dropped me off there and there was it the rest is history I can't relate to that because I remember growing up and any time you have to write to the a CBC I mean back then you have to post things they'll say they'll say it and then I say action part I mean I need to I need I need to see this place and

I did and I did I'm one of these people that believe that I am the most powerful being in my world and anything that I think which is very cliche we hear it all the time but I'm constantly practicing and testing my own theories I believe I can be a kick-ass broadcaster let me give it a bash I believe I can sing let me try it out whether people like her or not slit slit we'll see but I believe that anything that I desire to become I validate myself I do not need validation from a

varsity from an on-air from this source that source I validate my own theories and I take them out into the world and I say let's try it but they try it then you go through these ups and downs right it's important yep the downs what what doubts are going through your mind do you doubt that you ever go up again or do you ever doubt that was I ever even good at this was this yes there are those moments I'm not even gonna lie to anyone there's those moments even now when I'm not going through

a dam I wake up in the morning and I'm battling insecurities I wake up in the morning and even when I'm running discs on radio during moments on radio on air whatever it is that I'm doing I fight the demon away you have to remind yourself of your personal confidence your internalized confidence this morning on the radio show we're talking about what motivates you are you internally motivated or externally motivated so great my motivation is constantly internal I don't even rely on my children to motivate me because if my kids turn out to be people

that I don't believe in what they decide that they're going to go in a different direction in their lives and I'm not for that cause and not for that direction that means I've lost my source of motivation so for me and then you think you did a bad job yes I'll think I've done a bad job when when I'm in my town I accept quickly the down I'm a very fast acceptor I'm like I carry sugar and ice myself like I'm my own bro just relax and then just look at yourself in the mirror and

say okay cool but what's the value in me and the value in me is that I can still talk yeah I've got all my limbs intact I still have a bit of a huge brain in my head I can still figure things out and in that down.i process insecurity I process doubt I process everything that is negative I don't stay there for too long cultivate quickly come back to resilience and just bounce back up again because you can be you can be your own worst enemy yeah you can be your own worst enemy by staying

in the negative for too long because I also believe you know people don't hate you as much as you can hate yourself absolutely yes and people will never love you as much as you can love yourself either so for me I'll send my downs you know it's so important that God is a constant in my life has been forever when my parents lost everything they lost the house they lost the car they lost the money I wrote them a letter I think I was in grade 3 or great 4 and I said to them don't

look back you're going to turn into salt you are placed where you are placed because you're going to go to another place in your life and that was that's always been me I always believed in journey I always believe in self restauration and you can't do it relying on external you have to internalize it so as you are made in a mirror image of God you are the world of God internally access that tap into that power tap into that place pastor Myles McGraw Myles Monroe dr. Myles Monroe taught me something incredible he says of

all the places mentioned in the Bible the one place that you cannot physically visit and locate on a map is Eden ask me why you are Eden you are your piece you are birth you are birth yeah you are dead you are creation you are life you are creation and also be kidding once you cultivate inside of Eden be careful what you feed the Adam and Eve of your Eden yeah be careful yeah because that will be what manifests that will be what grows so I bounced back because I nurture my Eden even when I'm

broke my Eden has never broke even when I'm crying my Eden is never crying even when I'm mourning I protect my Eden my Eden is the farm and the soil of everything born of me okay now I get why you guys wanted me to come so bad yeah listen dinero has never been one to come to a fistfight holding a white flag whether it's a Twitter feud a family argument she comes in swinging she's set in her ways and as a result is often misunderstood remember water blinds are open all yours now any questions for

Jenelle she's all yours shall answer them when we come back dinero takes us a deeper into her past [Music] oh my gosh I come from babe babe I remember watching that episode I'm like - no please stop speaking back we'll talk about mine stop she's back and and your mother said this like it is the first time I heard anyone say yeah but like my mom's beating me up a couple of today you know she has moved me a couple of times and I'm glad yeah Wow I come from there I was at some point

my EDA needed to be pruned hey why are you in this for us I don't know it was pure entertainment do you know diary was my life I tell you why I did Dean I was diary I just really wanted your average South African person who's obsessed with the entertainment industry and sees you know there's this there's this theory of the corner office with the perfect view and that's how people view the entertainment industry as the corner office with the perfect view they see the eyebrows on fleek they see the makeup they see this they

see the dress in the red carpet moment that is a moment captured in an image beyond that moment they is a person beyond that moment there are layers of feelings there are layers of frustrations there are moments of nothingness and I wanted to do dinero's diary and I called it mogul in the making I subtitled call mogul in the making everybody took it at face value that I'm calling myself a mogul in the making it was actually the concept of mogul being everyone of us is a mogul in the making and not mogul in the

sense of monetary value but self wealth and self-appreciation we are all in the making you know you need to stop seeing things at face value you need to go deeper you need to allow yourself to be gracefully broken would you agree that everyone that the public sees you know in in the in the spotlight there are no finished products they know there are no finished products yeah mama we nee as she rests in peace today yeah only now she's a finished product in your life you are incomplete as you live and as you dwell on

earth you are restless in spirit every now and again you are restless in thought every now and again you are restless in culture your mind your spirit your culture my culture I mean personal habits and personal traits when you have no audience you are restless every now and again there is no peace in Bologna we are all unfinished products trying to be complete and death completes us so why then strive for us if we're never going to reach it because it's a beautiful thing to do life is best lived in the sky motion in motion

in motion the water still waters run very deep yeah right and the power of water is seen in movement yeah when a wave and the tsunami comes that's when you understand the power of water you'll never truly understand the force of water and the power of water when it's still but when when your life becomes a wave rise and say no sir that you cannot because carry on like you just didn't say that whew you'll never understand the power of water when it is standing still you'll never understand it you'll never understand it stick a

fork in me I'm done you'll never understand oh where you studies too so you are water so you can never understand your power if you're still so if you if you're standing still and if you're not judging to test yourself if you're constantly going to be afraid and and limit yourself because of Aban basra tina syndrome and because of your own insecurities and because of the devil in you because we blame external forces but no you are to blame for most of your yoyo discrepancies with self I mean if you if you're constantly going to

be still and you go constantly going to be afraid and you're gonna sit in the shell because you feel okay maybe I can't maybe I can't you'll never understand your power okay move be fluid enter into spaces drive yourself push yourself create a wave of your and if you are water water most to the shape of being fluent therefore don't be scared that you want to fit just capability to adjust my mother chased me out of home you saw that was not a lie with my children I said I'll take them and we will adjust

I will take them we will adjust today there is Karm hominid is harmony soon as I adjusted how many times have you been told you not marriage material I asked me how many times I've told guys I've been told quite a number of times my recent marriage proposal from a vendor men he said to me when will you ever submit and I said to him when will you ever teach me the garden you because I submit to what you submit and if your leadership qualities are distorted I have nothing to submit to then I'm just

letting go of myself I'm fully much aware of what a man is and what a man needs to be I can teach you that but I can see it in your actions I can see it I can discern it so for me if you're not my king don't ask me for my hand in marriage don't who is this guy I'm not desperate I'm desperate for the God in you and if that God is lacking yeah then you can't lead me but are you dating him no we've we've we've we've broken up we've broken up okay

cuz then broken up so you broke up because you could not see this God in him it was it was not gonna go anything I tell you something when you speak of God it's one thing but when you act like God it's another so for me to speak of God and be proud and arrogant in your in your speech around God but your but your actions are you know the moon humility is the best leadership quality any man can have to tame a powerful force of a woman like myself if you're going to be proud

you're going to destabilize and you're going to make aggressive the lioness in me but also you probably to prod you if you're too pro competing you compete and I don't do competition I'm a homemaker I'm a home builder yeah and you can't ask for submission submission is inspired by leadership a man should not be going to a woman and asking for submission you can't go to a woman and say when are you going to submit it's not a clock yeah it does not really let submission li-like cprt iron a scheduled duty how trainee Azuga see

a submitter was six years of metal or seven we automatically as women we become that which the man is and the aggression in a woman says a lot about the man in you so come on leadership guys one on one I can't teach you these things but I observe and I know what's not mine I know the atom of my Eden there Christian in a woman says a lot about the man in you yes yes yes looks is an old thing about being a jack-of-all-trades but a master of none well it turns out that none

of the supplies that when it comes to know she has practically done everything and there's more stay tuned [Music] welcome back just when you think she's on radio there's an announcement that she's on to something else do you know is constantly evolving and it's hard to catch up fortunately she's here to fill us in on all of it loving all the lots of voices that are coming through so I need to I need to honor your people because they are flooding in for the movie let's roll the first one I have this one question for

you do you believe in tradition like cuz I really I really watch your reality show on TV and you believe in culture do you believe the ref and Roma can heal you I'm a very traditional person but I'm more spiritual than I am traditional and that spirituality is my tradition so I do not disrespect anyone or anything in that space or any practice in that space however I came to a spiritual decision to trust my Creator because you gave work assets yeah nay yeah hello Zack I said by dimmu Baca yes your and my ancestors

by elevating Moody no one can hide so they are from the creation of God yeah and I respect my ancestors yeah but it's God's will that ought to be done and for me God is the authority of me and God is the authority of my ancestors so for me I do not choose one over the other the other they they live they coexist they coexist however do i subscribe to consulting Limassol norma on a regular basis you know I don't why did you go to that Selma I went because I've never been okay and I

felt it's something I need to explain I'm not good if you haven't gone you cannot good if you haven't tried it so if you're gonna say no that does not work give something else to place on the table and I could not say no because I haven't been there was a debate in my family as you saw on the show my mother is not for it my father is for it then I said mama I've been of Christ with you together for the longest time allow me to be on this journey with my father and

I went on their journey with my anila I learned so much in our pants I learned so much I respect about pansy with all my heart so to answer your question I am very traditional very cultural very gifted in that regard but also my first point of consultation will always be with Chico so man so did you find a certain element of healing though going to the I did I did find a certain Christian yes that's why I'll never knock it yeah that's why I will not sit in judge a person or your vanity someone

Mighty Morphin or consulta and so forth I won't do that I will not say he indeed no I won't do that because there was a sense of yeah yeah now I know yeah and also there was a great valuable education that I took from there here and I respect that space at the sacred space it's a black space and also you can't necessarily knock anything that helps you find the garden yes so yeah here you okay next voiceover hello dinero hello an alien I'm gonna keep this short I think you should write a book oh

my god I did I III college in send it again please and so and so I will continue with the process okay I really get in you with the process thank you for that that is um I don't often seek validation externally but when I do get it and it's unsolicited I appreciate it especially when it comes in the form of sincerity in that nature I appreciate it so deeply and also just on a business level [Laughter] there's a big similarity between me and you intentions Tan's Maria and you you are aware of it and

people tell you people tell me all the time all the time like you know you might have dinner and I'm like yes I know and I'm proud of that yeah almost thank you we're gonna say you remind me I say as well and I also say thank you yeah thank you because you're putting me on the same space as a person that I admire as well you thank you yeah and now the world because you know III I used to stalk you sorta like so what's gonna happen now and and luckily gonna cut the entire

season yes you Beyonce to me the answer that's exactly what I did and I picked up a similarity is that both you and I we have a bit of trouble letting go of things uh-huh and you know why people call it hoarding mm-hmm talk to me about your hoarding stuff my hoarding self foods or xem you look after my parents my parents are hoarders and they'll deny it they also denied they hoard but i-i've learned to step out of their culture of hoarding and just learn to now let go yeah right so I'm not sure

if you saw the Fung Shui episode yeah when I went dramatic and I know my parents to let go of the swimming pool I brought in a tractor got rid of that egg you burst the pipe burst a pipe missed up the yard and it's yeah holding yeah money but you know I believe if I can show a man yeah there's a psychological shackle to it yes and because we were we were raised to not waste and and raise 2 to to know the value of money and not necessarily the amount of it you know

there is something that you we're not facing when it comes to it that there's a deeper meaning of us not wanting to let go and I've been trying to find it do you know where it stems from yeah I'll tell you especially in our black community yeah forgive me for isolating everyone else let's zoom in here on the brown you know these brown people right have you seen cloudmom Sabine Xena yeah okay yes bomani bomb yeah Amma KK Appleman a bomb but this in Gua Bahama KK any maha boowa get any more ephemeral any modern

emoji and one hay ningún evening yeah but our elders will hold all yes and then it's like even it's it's painful to even just there's thousands of digits yeah and it's it's it's it's in us in the small little things like a Mesa Benzi in Machado and you know funerals and stuff like that it's almost like when a little tailor who de Medici so it's almost like we were used to hugging things that's what I really get silly I mean yeah things that soil the teeth and great cavity let it go my tau yeah close

your mouth I think let it go and and likely we've got a clinical psychologist here because I was that you and I have to discuss I think we don't realize how much poverty follows us because we are here now I nearly huh I named it uh-huh hold that hold that thought cuz we're gonna take an ad break because you know it's often easier to talk about other people's problems for our own you know our own good but I mean I'm gonna make us an example yeah I have tons of things that I've collected from close

the kitchen way things that I'm never again ever gonna use but for some one reason I cannot just give them away and I must admit I am a hawker so I'm embarking on a journey to do something about it after the break we're joined by a clinical psychologist Casa Gianna to help us start this journey but also guys I know you left in a hurry stop calling the wiser blind send voice notes because now you are disturbing people are trying to send them a voice note so that they can talk to quell will be back

[Music] this is my kitchen my favorite room in the house I love to bake and cook and have a friends and family come over for dinner and I can bake real nice cake I was a law student for 10 years from 1986 to 1996 I didn't take the exam to become officially but I did study and prepare for it okay I'm not like that okay but I mean I'm the same I'd like to challenge everyone let's support each other let's go through this process of ridding ourselves of all emotional and physical cata together we welcome

our resident wisdom guru kasi Gianna clinical psychologist into this conversation so heard I have a question why do we hoard ha so then a million you know answers for 4 different people but in principle there is that sense of insecurity within us of a diminishment because we have in some way consciously or subconsciously attached ourselves in our sense of self to things and there's a sense of a listening if I have this one thing less there is one thing less of me and so it is a sense of holding together of the self internally by

holding out side externally to things that they may have had value to us at some point but the point is to recognize when they lot no longer do but but that's where we miss it they may have had value but the point is to recognize when they don't know you we hoard human beings as well we do emotions and we do I find that a lot of people I always use the word chameleon we become chameleons because we're afraid to let go of relationships and a person that no longer serves us we're psychologically do we

then literally and physically tap into ourselves to crack that mold yeah it is it is about knowing that there is a me we're going to that me again yeah you know there is a me a me that that is intact you know you that that Eden in us that can never be touched by circumstance that is whole and complete and and and when we talk about the definition of being materialistic it is not our relationship to things but it is our relationship to the self that you serve where we feel the self being enhanced by

the having of things and fear the self being diminished by the absence of things when we when we assess and and when we when we have a sense of our self being dependent on okay whereas that self is unconditionally itself and in its fullness you know there's always a negative connotation when someone says mature you're materialistic right is that why then we are even fighting the process of not being materialistic because you can't even see that you materialistic because you're so busy fighting that I'm not you know I'm not you know cuz when you say

materialistic you think gold digger somebody just calmly vanity and all of that yeah so I'm not a person who who is vain so therefore this is why I didn't realize I'm that yeah so I'm blocking myself from from the truth by fighting so hard absolutely you know there's those seven deadly sins one of them is gluttony and gluttony is not limited to food is spiritual clutch in you it's emotional clutter is a psychological material a whole lot of gluttony but gluttony is you know it is the difference between its being a shaming when we are

actually meant to be a sponge what's a shaming you used to wipe to clean a car that sucks that reverie yes yes it comes in it's almost like a cloth way water doesn't go into it yeah I see that it's got that it feels wet but it in water it doesn't go through yeah whereas a sponge you run water it comes out so that's what we that's what we become we become a Hashemi so we should be a sponge you should be a sponge because when we release we create space for newness okay I see

that can you imagine the seasons you know cheese let go can we imagine trees refusing to let go of their leaves in autumn and somehow what are they gonna become in spring we kill off the growth is which brings me to what is the danger for a human being in me not learning how to let go what's that what will I be like at the end of of life so what you hold on to holds you down it weighs you down I mean it weighs you down so you cannot move forward because you know there's

that principle that if you want to keep someone down and make sure that they don't rise you have to stay down with them because there's no other way to say that again if you want to keep someone down you have to make sure that you stay down with absolutely so because if it put a Down syndrome move down you have to be down there with your natural your natural reflex is to grow right yeah so if I put it down I let you go you're gonna grow but if I pull you down I must keep

you there and that means I'm not even crossing I'm also must stay there absolutely so in trying to sabotage another it is self sabotage so just buy me the material things that I'm holding on to you know I'm just holding on to them all they're doing is holding me down well I could just give them to somebody else and they can flourish with them yes and it's exactly and it's not just holding you down it is withholding from others what's the relationship between things that we hold on to and the energy well sapping energy aren't

we mm-hmm because that energy is meant to be you voices water sorry guys times over buttons obviously this is the path it is the first step to mini we are going to release all of us especially me I'm gonna go into my house and everything that I don't need we're gonna bring it here and we're just gonna give it away I'm gonna Joe and how does that leave for you it feels good feels like you know I need space I can't live with clothes mmm I can't live with parts of country with pens you know

I just need whoo my people are dead yeah and now we're gonna do that and knowing the enoughness yeah of things okay thank you so much to my wonderful gift what an episode right thank you at home for joining in on the conversation tomorrow's episode we talk about love looking for love so listen Julie who's in a movie about that will be here she's joined by our relationship expert Kofi thank you so much for tuning in leading us up next good night [Music] [Music]