Ultimate Guide To Raising Financially Literate Kids | Scott Donnell

What you don't want is for your kids to live in your Shadow I grew up in a middle class family and my parents lost everything in 2008 so in my adult life I've had to how do you set up the right processes for your kids to succeed in life and learn the character traits and learn the financial competencies there's two rules for a healthy struggle number one I think every generation has the Chance to be that power mover like hey it's stops with me this generational curse generational trauma these issues that it stops with me

and that's just a decision what's going on Wealth Builders today I've got a man who has exited multiple companies one of which had an IPO of over a $ hundred million now his mission is to serve families and help teach kids and families financial literacy they've served over 7 million families at dinner Table I have got Scott donnald what's up man how you doing buddy good to see you well I'm excited to talk about just how to raise kids with understanding money because I have three kids under uh hopefully I have some more here but

I've always just wondered man like how do you teach them skills and to earn things especially you know for for them they're going to come up in a much more wealthy environment than I did and that many people do but like how do we start Training our kids to be financially Savvy from a young age whether you're with wealth or without wealth yeah yeah man uh you just asked a behemoth of a question we're going to have to unpack this for for a while but I think a lot of people what happens is you know

we've been studying the top families in the world now for over a decade and the moment you start to make it and you start covering the bills making profit getting wealth building yourself up Especially like a first gen wealth yeah the number one thing that happens when they have kids is I just want to give all my kids all the things I never had uh I want to give my kids all the opportunities I never had I don't want my kids to have to struggle the way I had to struggle that those are like the

top three things that most people say and that comes from a place of love but but the problem is how did you get to be who you are right How do you think you got here right struggling struggle healthy we call them healthy struggles yeah and so if you bubble wrap your kids around wealth and um it creates victimhood it creates entitlement it creates spoiling it creates anxiety if if you don't if you don't have your kids actually go through these like processes to grow then you're going to Bubble Wrap in their whole lives and

it's going to be right back to the same problem that you grew up with In one generation that's the issue with all this right so that's what most of my life is is like helping families continually grow every generation not just with the wealth side we got to be we got to talk about that a lot but with the family mindsets and skill sets and values and beliefs like all these things have to roll together cuz if if you think your job as a parent is like literally just to like keep them safe Get him

out of the house and then die with as much stuff as you possibly can muster you're going to ruin them right you're not teaching them any character no you're just providing essentially yeah and kids like you you know the Green family The Hobby Lobby family they're one of our hundred families that we've been studying for over a decade so basically we got this huge group of some of the best families in the world that we've been searching for forever and we Study them we interview them we're friends with them we learn about how they raise

kids to blow by them right CU it's not about wealth it's about how do you raise each generation to blow by you that's true Legacy to me well he said something to me a few months ago this is David green and he goes every time you give your kids something uh that they didn't earn you're robbing something from their future and and that really hits home for A lot of parents because I I think a lot of parents think that successful parents is providing everything my kids need making sure they're comfortable that they have all

the opportunities that I pay for all of the fun experiences and pay for all the things they need so that they never have to want never have any issues but that can lead down a crazy path yeah that's interesting because I mean for me I grew up in a middle- class family and my parents lost everything in 2008 so we lost my childhood home I grew up in we literally they didn't have anything they lost their businesses job all that so in my adult life I've had to you know just provide they provided for me

you know throughout uh as a kid and all that but as an adult they they haven't been able to do much for me and that's forced me to learn how to be a provider it's forced me to learn how to not depend on anyone and build skills and all these things and now for all the Things I've built like I have this sense of accomplishment that I've earned this Y and I even think like man if I wanted a my dream home I don't want someone to just give it to me like I want to

earn it I want to know when I'm living in this thing that I earned it and now that I'm in more wealthy circles I I've met people who come from wealth and they're kids of parents who have given them everything and they haven't had to earn it and they just don't really have Fulfillment and they they have entitlement they have all the things you're talking about yeah yeah 90% of generational wealth is gone by the grandkids just gone pissed away but what people don't study is what I what I study is what they most people

don't what's underneath that 90% gone number okay divorce estrangement addiction violence drug abuse like basically victim mentality lottery ticket syndrome I mean if you if you're just giving your kids all this stuff that they didn't earn it's a glorified participation Trophy and they know they didn't earn it and if kids aren't prepared for the wealth that they're getting prepared for the assets that they're going to inherit or get like you're giving them a catastrophe and like Jordan Peterson said this one time we were in a small group talking about this he goes do you know

the only thing that keeps an addict Out of the gutter H being broke and I I think wealth is makes you more of who you already are and those that accumulate wealth by creating value and serving other people and going through the healthy struggles are formed and prepared for it those that are given it or handed it that aren't prepared for it it makes them more of that yeah and that's catastrophic yeah so this is why we have to be really careful with how we're raising our kids we have to think About this stuff ahead

of time because the whole financial industry by the way and you're in this world I got the whole financial world is like my job is to secure protect and grow your assets until you die for future Generations cuz that's your legacy yeah and I go that's not legacy it's very different Legacy is raising your kids and grandkids and great-grandkids to blow by you in all the ways that matter that's Legacy in fact you're going to ruin your legacy if your if you think that your job is just to secure protect and grow the wealth until

you're dead yeah right let me let me ask you a question so if you could pass one of these three things on to your kids what would it be all your money and stuff all your knowledge or all of your experiences which one would you say is top h two and three are kind of I I feel Like they're very similar like your experiences kind of give you your knowledge there you go right so if that's the if that's what you said first there's an entire financial industry that's like no no no your legacy is

all about leaving as much stuff and assets and giving your kids that leg up that's not a leg up that's a handout yeah so I I think the conversation needs to happen I don't believe you leave them nothing that's not what I believe either you Know I believe in Heritage over inheritance but you know this is a it's an important thing to discuss with families because the the marching orders in our culture is stabilize the family grow as much wealth as you can get it Diversified get it secured get into all these things so that

your kids have a great future your grandkids are taken care of they'll never have to you know worry and I'm like it's not that's not that's not what you're supposed to do Right so you know we're talking about we don't want to just hand him a whole bunch of money by the way you can cut it right here if you turn that black knob it'll uh fix that yeah sorry about that it just keeps like slowly sinking on me it always does that this one yeah okay that's what tightens it yeah I think we're good

all right sorry oh you're good I I was just saying okay so we're talking about we don't Want to just leave them with a bunch of stuff right we want to leave them with is is the answer knowledge or experience or is it both I mean it's it's it I don't think there's a right or wrong answer what I hear uh 99% of the time is experiences yeah right because the know yeah kids kids think in story yeah they learn all lessons are learned in story Jesus spoke in parables y right story brand the best

companies share the best stories so I think experience is where We that's what we should be focusing on passing down yeah that's what gives your kids a Heritage that's what gives them a last name that means something that's where they actually get information to stick in their mind yeah I think that the knowledge comes through that right yeah and I think that I don't want my kids to just know stuff and be smart I'm really more concerned about their character and you know that that comes down to Faith and everything else right Like it's like

man if I can have you know in the Bible it doesn't talk about having the knowledge of Jesus but we are to have the character yeah of Jesus that's what we're pursuing yeah so at the end of the day like if I can pass down man just having great character and discernment and all those things that will inevitably lead to everything else in their life being good so it's just like so how do you do it yeah so what do you think I mean if you look at Scripture how is character built struggle yeah creates

perseverance so I just go send them to boot camp or what what do I do no I don't think tough love is the way to do it okay so I I Define healthy I I think all kids should be going through a lot of really healthy struggle and entitlement this is what everyone's worried about right kids today are day trading victimhood and entitlement like it's water like it's Currency you go on social media and all you have to do is be a victim or be entitled about something that's how you get followers and likes mhm

like culture will breed entitlement and victimhood if we don't do something in our home with our kids yeah like you look at Amazon Prime one click it's coming tonight yeah social media I get anything I want dopamine hit right away right there's no more waiting till like next week's show at 6:30 whatever kids get everything They want right now right and so that's just entitlement like crazy and so we have to be able to set up these systems in the home which is what we do with amilies we train this of how do you set

up the right processes for your kids to succeed in life and learn the character traits and learn the financial competencies and so it's it's about healthy struggles and so there's two rules for a healthy struggle number one you're on their team yeah me versus you Is tough love it's neglect it can be abusive it can be traumatic but if I'm on your team right and I'm helping you through these things I'm not solving your problems but I'm with you and encouraging you and coaching you like as a parent yeah that's rule number one rule number

two it's a safe place right it's a safe environment you're not throwing them to the wolves and you're like 50/50 you're going to get super hurt I'm saying healthy struggles are Like how do you learn emotional skills and character and any athlete or academic knows this right any entrepreneur knows this yep you got to go through those healthy struggles because that's the only way to be refined and learn the capabilities to get confidence yep right that's the only way to do it that that's why you know you can't Pat your kid on the back every

day and be like you're smart you're pretty you're smart you're pretty you're Good at soccer you're good at you're good at writing it's like yo you got to work on this you yeah that that's outer confidence yeah that doesn't last inner confidence comes from growing a tool belt of capabilities and skills that add value in the world and those come from healthy struggles so you know my definition of entitlement is this a consistent process where kids have problems solved for them over time that is what breeds entitlement right that's Why that's how kids get to

the point of being like I oh I expect this I deserve this you're supposed to get me this of course you should pay for this stuff Mom and Dad I need to of course I deserve the front of the line I shouldn't have to struggle through this you solved it last time solve it again it's about problem solving and so many parents think that loving their kids means solving all the problems for their kids they fight the teacher for better Grades they actually what they do is they grade the stuff the night before so that

their kids never get Miss a mark right this happens all the time yeah they'll bring lunch if the kid forgets they bring the sports clothes the moment the kid you know messed up they fight the coach for more playing time right how do you how do you know the line though because like okay my kid messed up do I bail him out because I'm a loving forgiving Parent yeah or do I let them suffer the consequence of being an idiot uh that's the dance right um I think that tough love is not has no place

in what we're teaching okay uh like good luck kid the key is to capture the kid's heart and build a relationship good because my most of my love is tough my kids are young so they don't have tough love yet I mean they're four year five years old four years so it's like They haven't had to go through it yet yeah but like I don't know just as an athlete is like bro this is what it is yeah you're going to you ain't playing today yeah you screwed up the the the the main thing that

families have to think about is how can I help my kids learn to solve their own problems okay that is a loving thing to do for sure uh but I don't think anyone would disagree with that that's not controversial right but that where's the line right that's The hard part I think the line is what can I do in this situation to help my kid learn more capabilities and get more confidence to create more value let's just take a real world example instead of like let's not talk in just ideas but let's use give you

one right now you want one well no let's let's use the example of kid forgot his his cleats today yep what do we do the first time do we forgive him and help him out and if he screws up the second time he's on His own like how do we do this yeah I mean there's is there a consequence to it right you can't play the game you got no shoes yeah I mean host of my my show Chad willardson his if his kids don't go through their start of the day in the morning they're

going to be late for school and Miss stuff yeah because they didn't start their day off the right way his kids have been late to school several times because they didn't do that yep it's their own consequence Right um you if you have to drive to school because they forgot stuff all the time you're just solving their problems for them right you will do everything for your kids until they learn to do it themselves and consequences are really the only way that kids actually learn this stuff and so yes I think there are some times

where you can be like all right I'm helping you out this time but here's here's the consequence of it but a lot of times parents are like well This is the last time or you're going to have a timeout or there's going to be a consequence later and then they just get exhausted right uh I think it's really important to hold that line with our kids as much as we can because that's how they learn yeah right and so often in the home parents get exhausted by this especially moms they get exhausted reminding the kids

over and over and over to do stuff mhm pick up the toy boys get your clothes in here you got to Clean your room the bed homework like they're just reminding they're like professional reminders yeah and it's exhausting for parents I think kids will expect you to do everything for them until they learn to do it themselves right so I think that's the thinking you know I I was just one of the dads in our coaching group because dinner table is basically one big coaching group we we teach our strategies for legacy and we help

families through all this and one Of the dads had an 18-year-old son that was wanting to still live in the house and because of one of our systems we did something called a pay to a point plan okay it's one of our strategies right so you're deciding how are we do in car how we do in school how how are we going to do car how we do in college how we can do their first home or when they get married or have a kid like what do we want to leave to them versus leave

in them right you you go through these Conversations it's awesome and after that conversation he realized that the the appropriate Next Step was to write his son a letter and sit down and basically say hey in 3 weeks you're on your own and I'm going to back you and Coach you and help you but you're on your own yeah and he got a letter two weeks after his son moved out that said thank you I never would have done that on my own I already feel more confident and I'm learning all these things I Needed

that MH so those are the kinds of conversations that I think have to happen yeah in the home so what do you do when a kid isn't figuring it out well there's a lot of reasons where this can happen uh well there's a lot of ways to unpack that are you talking about they're just not wanting to like they're lazy and Rebellion you're like yo hey if you don't do your homework you know you're going to get bad grades or and then they just like yeah whatever I Want to go play Call of Duty yeah

this comes down to uh what we call Value creation mindset okay can I unpack this for a minute okay it's the number one strategies of all the best families in the world you ready for this because if you do this right it solves that issue okay the best families in the world this is the number one strategy that we teach out of our 18 okay because we've been learning from the top 100 families in The world for over a decade all of them said this we want to teach our kids to create Value First in

the world not money see money is a store of value created so we have to take it back a whole step okay because kids don't think about money the same way that adults do okay they don't have the incentives structures and money is just a tool right it's it's a store of value yep that's created but if you make money everything with your kids it becomes Identity if it's just money money money we're talking about this you know we're buying this look at this then it becomes achievement status identity okay and that's a keeping up

with the Joneses fight for the rest of their life yep if you see money as bad and you never talk about it it's it's a you know we don't talk about the home it's the biggest fight then it's a poverty mindset because money's not good or bad but money is a tool it's a store of value so What all these families did is they went back a step and they were like all right we're going to teach our kids to create value in the world and then we'll it'll fix all the other issues and so

value um there's three types of value that you can create in any situation you ready for these material value which is money is usually the result you're solving problems you're getting wants and needs for other people you're doing gigs around the house you're finding ways to To solve issues right that's material value created y there's emotional value which is how good of a friend you are or good of a sibling how you think how you feel how you help other people think and feel better then there's spiritual value how you connect to God right how

you get outside of your own ego and pride and love other people right faith hope and love and connecting others to something above themselves to God those are the three types of value and if you can Teach your children to become value Hunters to like have a lens to look at the world around them in terms of what value can I create in this situation everything starts to change like everything yeah and so you don't get those issues when you do that you don't get the issues of kids being spoiled or an or anxious or

lazy and checked out or a victimhood mindset right you're you're you're teaching them to find in any situation ways to create Value in those three buckets and it frees them from all these other issues so if you've got a kid who's just checked out they're like I don't care what you do to me I don't care what consequences you give me who cares that's a kid who doesn't have the capabilities and confidence to create value yeah they don't have that mindset anymore they've never had it and most likely it's because they've never actually gone through

any healthy Struggles to learn the capabilities and confidence yeah so do you think that I mean I probably know the answer but like these kids that uh don't want to do anything let's call them lazy rebellious whatever all of that is stem employees just so you know all this stuff applies to teams and companies okay like yeah keep going yep all of that stems from how they were brought up in their perception of value creation yep all of it yeah but like how do you fix that now Because people are listening to this right now

and they're like dude my teenager they're they're like this and yeah we never taught them the right things like what yeah what do you do now you know what the number one question I used to get asked because I've I've helped you know I've helped about 7 million families if with through all of our companies okay dinner table is just getting going in the last couple years we've served tens of thousands and it's Just starting to scale but all the other companies that we've created about seven million now okay um the number one question I

used to always get asked was hey help me teach my kids about money that was always the number one thing because I'm the financial literacy expert but now you know what I hear the most where were you 20 years ago right it's too late for me yep and I say nope that's the biggest lie that's the biggest lie our strategy For legacy are a recipe for the family and it does not matter which age your kids are or maybe you have grandkids maybe your kids are grown maybe in in your 70s you put together our

strategies and this stuff just starts to transform over time I've seen 28-year olds with parents that are like my kids's checked out they're in debt they they're they don't care anymore they think we're in late stage capitalism they threw away the family values long ago and you start Implementing these strategies of legacy and then weeks go by days months like and all of a sudden stuff starts to shift yeah so it's never too late is the point I'm trying to make like it is never too late if you that's a lie from the pit of

Hell you just put the recipe in place and over time it starts to transform your family for good okay so if you've got a teenager for instance okay and you have a lot of conflict over chores they're checked out they're Always asking you for the money and stuff yep you know constantly asking well they're not going through their own you know healthy struggles um well they victim mental like I am struggling I'm bullied yeah well are are you are you a victim or a Victor right right are you a value Creator our family has certain

values that our kids abide by yeah right Donalds do hard things Donalds do the right thing Donald's make things better so like we have clear values in our Family that our our four kids say every night at dinner you want to know what it is okay Faith Family and fish so we love God we back our family and fish which stands for fun and Adventure Integrity service and hard work see our kids know exactly what it means to be a Donal and we talk about it every night at dinner what are our values you know

my three-year-old says it Faith Family Fish and then we're looking for stories throughout the day to celebrate with our Kids how they're living out faith family and fish and so they're getting this identity in our family of what it means to be a Donal and it just collapses all those issues like they just get erased yeah because know what it means to be a Donald they know what our answer is going to be before it happens yeah and so it really keeps them from being checked out from from being lazy from being entitled right they

know that if they come to me and ask for money and Stuff that I have a whole menu of gigs that they can be doing around the house at all times to earn that's we call that our family economy system that we teach and our kids never ask us for money and stuff ever again no conflict over chores which we don't call them chores so yeah we we have a system in the home where there's just there's no choice for entitlement or victimhood okay so once again going back to the person who has they they

weren't trained up in this They they've got older kids who have been uh mismanaged for this this time it is what it is yep so we're going to say hey it's not too late not too late let's let's let's incorporate our family I don't know motto Y and our values let's create this gig system yep you want you want something earn it essentially my three best tips for this would be our three our top three strategies that we give because that's What we tell people like look just come and learn this stuff and start implementing

and we make it super easy that you can explain it to a 5-year-old okay the first one is the value creation thinking okay and and I after we wrote our book value creation kid uh Sharon Lecter came to me she's like the Godmother of financial literacy she was actually part of Rich Dad Poor Dad with Robert kosaki she helped do that book she actually helped come out with the Whole Cash Flow game she's kind of the voice behind all of this MH um and so she came to me after we wrote the book and she

said Scott this value creative idea you have no idea when she was a kid she said my dad asked me one question every single day and it changed my life you want to know what it was what value did you create for someone else today he asked her that every day growing up and she said it completely transform my life to make me who I am Today and so that is the starting point okay that's a simple question you can ask your kids at night or during dinner or after prayers give them the lens to

look at the world in terms of how can I add value in this situation okay that's a critical piece the the second piece is um so that's one of the strategies that's one of the strategies just ask your kids hey how did you generate value today yeah and we give tools and strategies on how they can help their Kids create value in those three ways material value emotional value and spiritual value so we just have like a just give me like an example of how so material value would be would that be like giving someone

something gigs around the house is a great way to do it setting up the the home economy system the family economy um emotional value understanding what it means to be a sibling a leader on the team a great classmate and taking action every day to Be a better friend and sibling and classmate right y um spiritual value is ways that they can be applying the things they're learning about God and loving others and the fruits of the spirit in their life like immediately it's just a system for them to keep them accountable and check in

and celebrate together as they grow because when a kid creates value with their own brain and their own hands and feet it lights them on fire way more than you making them do Stuff and pushing them to do stuff and reminding them to do stuff see the goal is intrinsic motivation and and kids are self-motivated to do this once they start to see the fruits of it yeah what so tell me about the gig system how does that work yeah so this is our we call it the family economy system it's our answer to the

allowance chores nightmare because allowance is socialism okay okay sorry if you do that with your kids my kids are too young I Don't even know what it is a lot of people are like wait what no I'm I'm lucky because I can now like I got like I said young kids so I can do it right from the get-go yeah you're going to you're going to crush it and and we start with our kids as young as two years old with this stuff with the quarter system so this is what we learned again from from

the top families in the world um they uh they they basically clearly said look allowance is Codependency your kids should never get the same amount of money every week just by existing that that actually in our studies as a company allowance is linked to a lack of motivation and an aversion to work yeah not the stuff you want to teach your kids it's entitlement it's entitlement and and but then some parents go well don't worry my kids I make them do chores and then they get an allowance well okay half those chores you should never

tie to money we call Those expectations that's your role in our family that has nothing to do with money this is like you should never pay your kids to make their bed clean their room do the dishes and trash homework after school be kind to their sibling like that's has nothing to do with money it's just their role in the family the other half those chores you should have a menu of ways they can earn by creating value around the house right and then they have an unlimited Opportunity to earn right that's why the chores

allowance is like 100-year-old archaic thinking that actually doesn't teach the kids Financial skills or value creation and then the worst of all is when parents are like don't worry I don't do the allowance I just make my kids do the chores like they're told well now you're paying for everything and they're not learning anything about money or financial skills or budgeting so our answer to this is something we Call the Family economy so there's three e expectations expenses and extra pay opportunities that's it expenses or expectations is the first one these are the things you

don't pay for in the home your kids know that's just the role in the family we're doing this stuff because they're pan yep right uh the second e is expenses most parents have never even thought of this one without expenses most kids have no motive to Earn or make money or do anything right they don't have a motive only % of kids have the entrepreneurial mind where they're like where am I making money Dad where am I making money mom how am I creating value they're just born with it in their DNA yeah 95% of

kids don't have that and it they need to be trained to become more entrepreneurial so by giving kids expenses to be in charge of it's an incredible incredible thing to do in the home it teaches them how to budget the Price of goods teaches them tradeoffs between goods it teaches them delayed gratification like all this stuff is learned by saying hey we're not going to be in charge of these few things anymore you're you're going to be in charge of it and so these are things like social outings with friends a toy um if they're

going to play basketball have them buy the basketball you can pay for the other stuff but they're in charge of their cleats or or one or two things with Every sport or extracurricular now they're going to own that activity right and then if you pass off expenses you just save yourself a bunch of money every month to then pay them to do extra gigs right so the gigs are the 30 extra pay it's just a whole host of things around the home that they can do to earn funds yep that they can use to cover

their expenses now they're learning value creation okay and what you want to get to is a a situation where the kids Are hunting around your house and in the neighborhood for ways to create value so like what are some things they can do so it starts with like sweep the garage right laundry clean a bathroom organize a closet stuff in the yard you know pack for the trip is there a certain dollar amount you would put to these based on the Family's wealth or like what the job is actually worth I'd say you know there's

different we have tons of families doing this yeah okay and Different families have different mindsets around it but generally speaking the more expenses you pass off to them the better you should pay them to so that they understand their value that that's being created because you're going to you were going to pay for all those things anyway you might as well pay your kids real value well that's I'm saying like do you pay them the true market value of the job they've done yeah or you know well we do because our Kids are in charge

of hundreds and hundreds of dollars of expenses now and they're under 10 right every month and we were going to pay for that stuff anyway so I want my kids to understand their value right some parents are like no no we just do a couple bucks here a couple bucks there keep it simple we just want them to get simple toys and simple expenses so they can start to learn that's fine but I want families to consistently grow because this is how We're raising adults by the way this is how you match the environment of

when they're off in the real world this is how you don't have the Failure to Launch syndrome or the issues when they're growing up okay so it's about teaching them to create value in the home but there's a special part of those gigs that we realized that makes it where the kids are on fire okay we call them brain gigs okay so the things I mentioned first were action gigs where you're Using your hands and feet sweep the garage you know make a meal clean a bathroom organize a closet whatever that's maybe worth a few

bucks here and there brain gigs are what make this super fun for the kids and then they just want to go crazy and do a ton of stuff okay brain gigs are where kids learn to use their brain to create value rather than their hands and feet because that's what you and I do right you're using your brain to create value in your Work right yep why aren't we teaching this to our kids so a brain gig is a way that a kid can earn a few bucks by a podcast a book an article a

TED talk right no sugar for a week no screen time for a month uh what about like these I would pay my kid five bucks to read a Tuttle twins book like that's I would rather pay my daughter Reagan to read a book than do it do something a chore around the house or sweep the garage because she's learning so much more with Her mind right like this summer we paid her five bucks for every book she WR she read and all and these are like little tutle twins books on Liberty and Entrepreneurship and civic

duty and free markets and all these things she would tell us two things she learned and one thing she's going to apply to her life that's all she got her five bucks she did 50 books this summer wow and it was a blast to having these conversations with her so valuable for her future and There's we have hundreds of these incredible brain gigs that teach kids capabilities and skills and give them confidence for the real world that's way over and above like just normal chores right like you you shouldn't even say the word chores anymore

in your home because kids just connect that to negative and useless and you have fights over it and tons of reminding them in Conflict what you should think about is skills Building right Chris Bay one of our good buddies he's brilliantly said that like hey we don't do chores at home we build skills it's a brilliant way to think about it and so if I want my kids to get a tool belt of incredible skills I want them to be reading books and learning podcasts and YouTube videos and articles and he here's one my daughter

planned our family trip this summer how'd that go she saved us two grand wow she's seven at the time flights three flights Get the best deal are we going to rent turo Uber like Drive where are we going to stay where are we going to eat what are we going to do she planned the whole thing she learned like 10 capabilities yeah we paid her like 50 bucks she saved us all this money and most importantly she owned the trip she l loved it it's going to be a core memory for the rest of her

life like that's what happens when you get kids to do to learn these things on their own rather than just do Everything for them that's a brain gig for us yeah and there's there's tons of those and that's really the thinking of these top families they're like we're going to build skills because we know that schools aren't teaching all the right stuff right you can't Outsource your parenting yeah you should Outsource business automate eliminate delegate can't do that in the home you got to bring this stuff around the dinner table so that's the point right

so obviously We want to teach them skills we want to make them understand the mentality of hey if I create value I earn money that's how this world Works um what else do do parents not know well the third of the three like the value creation and the family economy the third one is this Heritage over inheritance thinking um I would actually say this Heritage before inheritance yeah explain what you think Heritage is because people people go I'm not oh you think I Should leave my kids nothing and just like die penniless well there's definitely

certain people that have said that right and everyone goes what it's a big old fight I'm not saying you leave your kids nothing what I'm saying is Heritage has to be the priority or else anything you leave them will ruin the Legacy Heritage is a last name that means something Heritage are the values of the family the character traits that you're talking about um what it means to Have your last name building that inside of your family and clearly giving your kids a road map on how to take it and run with it and blow

by you that's Heritage to us so values we we actually help families in our workshops and our coaching groups at dinner table we help them craft their values the crest of the family what it means to be in their family but then also how to pass it on to the kids right like I walking through your your Halls it's been it's been Awesome to see like all the values are on the wall all the things are on the wall well with kids it's a little bit different kids don't think in terms of a mission statement

on a wall kids think in terms of story in 30 years our kids are not going to be sitting around the dinner table or the campfire pointing at the mission statement on the wall they're going to be telling stories and so the key for us as parents is to craft stories of your Heritage where you came from how you met their mom how where your ancestors came from and then you tell the values of the family through those stories does that make sense MH that's how these things get passed on from generation to generation that

makes sense I was yeah it was funny you brought that up because I was literally thinking about it I was like wouldn't that just be my core values anyways for how we run the company because those are core to me in What I believe you know and they're they're the same values I'd want for my kids you know Sera s play fair train daily no ego those are our four core values and then Faith oversees all of it yep I think so many people can take a Playbook from good Mission and culture in companies and

apply that to their house yeah people just don't think that way like we we were with so many entrepreneurs that don't think that way about their family what if your family Is your most important investment if it truly is your most important investment then you need to invest in the family you need to think about it take all your best business principles and entrepreneurial lessons and apply them to your family mhm and I think you know if you can't explain something to a 5-year-old you don't know what you're talking about this is why I love

working with kids yeah I love working with families because it makes me clarify Message so much more clearly and that's why Mission Vision Values it's told through stories if if you want to kill a company get rid of the chief Storyteller if you want to kill a family Legacy get rid of the chief Storyteller I mean why do you think we're so close to World War I in our world because all the World War II vets are dying the stories aren't being told the new generations coming up aren't feeling it and seeing it they're Not

being told the truth of what happened what was that you know 90 years ago 80 years ago they don't even believe that kind of evil is around much less a ter you know a dictator that could do this to the world it's why we're so close to World War II in Deuteronomy there there's a verse that says uh and there came a generation this is about the Israelites and there came a generation after them that NE knew neither God nor what he had done for Their ancestors right they just forgot it all the stories weren't

passed down the parents screwed up Heritage they didn't pass down the stories of what God had done and built in that Faith built in that like resiliency and built in that like god- first mentality why do you think they wandered so long in the desert and all these kings came and messed everything up they messed up Heritage that's why this is such a critical piece man like so I think the The best takeaway for families is like become really good storytellers that have all the principles and values of your family baked in because if you

don't your kids are going to translate those stories into something negative they're going to change the stories they're not going to remember them the right way so get really clear on what your family stands for and then hunt for stories of your kids living it out like we celebrate at dinner every night we Have this rule until further notice celebrate everything because that's how kids learn through fun and real life experience only those two things so we celebrate every night when we're having dinner we're talking about the day and what they've done to display our

family values and they're talking about what each other did and what they saw and we're doing like cheering and like power claps and like we need to be hunting for those stories within our kids and make Those the family stories that we tell over the years too many families dude like they tell the embarrassing they tell the The Cut You Down Stories the gossip the gossip especially if someone's successful especially if somebody's like the power mover successful cousin or sibling then the other members of the family want to just cut them down they want to

tell stories that embarrass them or make them feel wor less than it Doesn't happen if you get the heritage stuff right you need to squelch that in your family you can't tolerate the little bad things the little evils in a family mhm talked about that this morning yep so that's why this stuff is so critical and and we call it roots and wings okay your kids need roots and wings kids are five times more likely to go off into the world carrying the values of their family if they know exactly where they come from what

the Family means what they stand for the values and character traits that matter the most and they consistently build that identity inside of their kids they literally have like a Rudder to go through the world five times more likely to carry it on than those who don't have that Rudder so it's roots in the family and wings to soar in so you know if I'm trying to implement this in my family you know you have um faith family and fish which is like a form of core values Essentially yep when I keep my same exact

core values and try to just used to them cuz I don't know that I would change anything that that that actually means that you're pretty transparent in your life your faith your work your family your heart like that's actually really cool to hear yeah uh yes I would take that like I would literally take those core ideas and figure out ways to tell stories in your ancestry your wife's Family your family your childhood your first businesses how you met and tell those stories kids kids love hearing stories of their parents and Grand parents and ancestors

you know we have this story that we tell our kids my ancestors the Donal family Camila donnal in the 1850s came across the Oregon Trail from Ohio she's from the video game yes died of dissenter we have her journal okay she wrote a journal of the entire trip it's like a 100 page Journal It is crazy and there's stories of Faith Family Fish all throughout it like we came up with that acronym CU our kids love it and they can remember it it's easy yeah but all those stories you can find throughout it and crazy

stories like one of the members of the tribe had of the band had took the last bullets he was 17 years old he went off to go kill a buffalo because they were all starving to death he found one three days journey away and as he's coming back with the Meat wolves stalk him yeah and track him up a tree yeah and he has to like Drop most of the meat and he shoots all the wolves and they're eating each other and gnawing at the tree over three nights like it's crazy we tell our kids

these stories and they love it because they feel this identity around it what if you know so like even we're guilty of this and once again we have young kids so we haven't really yeah thought about doing all these things yet but um you know Family heritage it's not something that um I don't know something I've valued per se like clearly I want to leave a legacy and all those things but it's like yeah you know this is my grandpa this is what he did this is you know your great grandpa I don't know anything

Beyond Great you know um but you know my dad came from the Philippines my mom was born in Arizona you know here we are it's just like Um we definitely need to do a better job of explaining our family history and valuing it I I also just think about other people and how uh maybe their family history isn't great yeah you know yep these are you know your three divorced yep you know whatever this is this this is that you know what happens when you got a rough family history you get to redeem it yeah

right like I think you're redeeming your last name as you go through this process you're going to Have your last name for the rest of your life and I think because so many parents we're working with have this they're like I don't I got care crazy past yeah there's divorce there's murder there's drug stuff there's you know estrangement and sickness and like I'm just trying to get away from it well you can't get away from your last name and you get to be what our friend Ed talks about the power mover mhm see one of

the strategies we teach is every generation needs to Become the power mover in their legacy you want your kids to blow by you like you're in the pinto they're in the Jaguar racing by you on the highway okay what you don't want is for your kids to live in your Shadow so we want every generation to take that mantle take that baton and just run with it right and so I think every generation has the chance to be that power mover hey it stops with me this generational curse generational Trauma these issues it stops with

me yeah and I get to be that power mover in my family line that redeems the name and transforms it and that's just a decision that is a today decision that people make and so many people don't even think about that but they carry this baggage yeah it's like a thousand pounds on their back till they just drop it and decide this is somewhat off topic but it makes me think like as somebody who is so um focused on Heritage yep are you an Advocate of having a lot of kids maybe not like Elon does

it but heck yeah okay I'm I mean not 20 kids with 15 women but yeah absolutely yeah you know I I think in 20 years we're going to have a population crisis underpopulation yeah and I think kids are a crown of Splendor there arrows in your quiver as the Bible talks about like to launch into the world Like There's No Greater Joy than that mhm right like it's an amazing amazing thing I think yeah I have a bunch of kids in fact all of my friends that have more than five kids I know this is

crazy to hear especially all the young people listen to this the jet the young 20s and 30s folks all of my friends that have five or more kids say that the moment they hit five kids it got easier than four six kids was easier than three seven was easier than two eight all right I was debating if my wife was going to watch this but now she can it's True see what happens is the more kids you have the more systems that you put in the home and the more they're literally helping each other they're

raising each other they're teaching each other that's what families used to do that's what families used years ago you needed just little workers I know families with one or two kids that are anxious and the parents are so stressed they're trying to do everything and teach everything and never have the kid Be bored and and all these problems and they're so worried it's like have a few more kids and you'll realize like oh I can just take a take a pause kids should be bored they're resilient it's awesome I oh I can enjoy the moment

more cuz it's so chaotic I can just enjoy the moment it's like amazing man parenting is hard in all the right ways you said you have three two four you have four now yep you guys didn't have any more I got snipped oh not my Choice my no my wife she's like all right Four's good she got the doctor's appointment for me I would have gone I would have kept going yeah but that's her call you know um but we love four kids like we're happy with it it's a lot of kids a lot but

hey we love it but five's easier than four I know that's what I told her all our like we have these friends the Johnson's they've got like 11 kids and these 11's not easier than four oh it's Wild no they they they swear that four was the hardest wow and having 11 is easier than two because they're raising each other they're training each other they have systems in the home they finish dinner every night and the eight kids that are still in their home are literally doing everything around the house they call it super quick

after meal cleanup party everyone has a job and the whole house is clean in 8 minutes flat with music playing and Parties and then they have like fun worship time at night and bible studies and they play all these Sports they go skiing together every single one of their 11 kids is an extreme skier world class like I was watching the two girls and two boys do backflips when I skied with them last year at all it was nuts what do you think about like uh Financial you know just having a lot of kids and

the and the financial let's call burden of that for families that Aren't well off I I I think it costs a couple hundred thousand to raise a kid in America right now between $200 and $300,000 from like to 18 yep with our family economy system you can almost cut that in half by setting up the gigs setting up the system because they go into Community gigs right away and so they're making money in the neighborhood they're learning all these ways to create value it's awesome but I I think It doesn't matter how many kids you

have um it's you make it work right like you don't it's not it's not that much money for every single kid right like there's Pass Downs there's there's hand-me-downs there's like it's cheaper to have more kids so I'm not worried about the financial side of it um it's just so many people get so scared to have kids these days oh yeah oh the money I'm not ready I'm not emotionally strong you're never going to be ready in those ways Like this is why people don't get married well that's what I was going to say I

mean everyone's getting married in their 30s now instead of before it was always in your 20s and you know kids and all these things are now like not a priority yeah I think that's a sad sad reality yeah um I think kids being a parent like I said before is is hard in all the right ways it makes you exactly who you wanted to become in the first place right just like sleeping 8 hours Is not easy working out eating the right food not easy being a parent is is difficult but it turns you in

to all of the character traits all the mindsets that you wanted in the first place it's such a great training until you've woken up five times a night and changed diapers and like yeah died for someone else selfless true selflessness for someone who's fully dependent on you for years yeah that's another level of character that's Another level of self-sacrifice right it's another level of of empathy and selflessness like you could some of this is only learned by being a parent right like it's a joy to do and and the as they grow up man it's

just a blast it's just a blast and our culture doesn't prioritize it yeah like I and I agree with you I'm just asking the questions because I know there are people listening and watching who who think that and they're like well you know it's Easy for you to say if you got money but you know kids are expensive diapers are expensive and in my mind I'm just like it it goes back to the root cause of okay why is my kid rebellious well it's it goes back to the root cause of you know if you

don't know value creation as a parent that's right then of course your kids don't know why would they know that makes no sense so much of this stuff I think people wait to get married and have Kids deep down if they really ask themselves the hard question is because they're worried about maturing they're worried about innovating and transforming their life building these skills so many people like oh I'm not ready I've had a terrible past like I couldn't do it's victim mindset at the end of the day I'll give you my theory I've talked about

this a lot on the show and just having lots of varying opinions single guys who are rich who are 40 and You know like yeah I can't find a good woman I'm like well duh you're 40 like what do you think bro the the good ones got married like I don't know what to tell you and the rest know that you're rich yeah like of course it's harder now yeah and you got more things going on you got more responsibilities you got uh baggage you got all these you've done a lot of wrong in your

life now you know like it's just and the older you get the more solidified in Your ways you become oh for sure you're less adaptable you're more selfish you've been living for yourself for 40 years like of course it's hard so you know but the things we're talking about is hey you get married young you start having kids young you learn to be selfless earlier on in your life you have to be you don't have a choice or you won't stay married you'll be a terrible parent you have to learn to be selfless that's right

that doesn't Happen when you're single see this is why this parent idea so critical we like getting out the entitlement getting out the laziness the anxiety the victimhood you those things have to be stamped out with our kids yeah and if we don't do it in the home the world's going to teach them all those things in Spades and you do not want to marry that person no way you do not want to go into business with that person like this is why this is so critical for our future like this I I Want my

kids to be powerful in work in marriage in family in faith like this there's going to be I think there's going to be the next generation or maybe it's another generation after Z maybe I was just looking this up actually because they're talking about on church on Sunday my kids are called generation Alpha I had no idea um so I think that maybe Alpha I don't know that Z is going to do it but I think Alpha is going to go back to what it was where they're Going to want to get married early because

I think they're going to see the ramifications of gen Z I mean that those kids are jacked up and then you know like Millennials and you know just this idea I think J is a little better off than Millennials uh well I I have a different mindset on this okay um maybe I'm a bleeding heart but I meet so many genz that care deeply about the world they're talented they're techsavvy they do work hard they just have had to fight Off the cultural norms okay I see so such a a Resurgence of political discussion like

Faith growth conservative thinking like there's a lot of this Resurgence happening look at the colleges now right like there's a lot happening so I I don't throw away the whole generation and and maybe that's my thinking here of studying the best families in the world and getting these Legacy strategies it staves off that fourth turning that you probably know Right like you know Rogan talked about this but strong men good times good times weak men weak men bad times bad times strong men right four kind what I'm getting at too I know how to jump

that I can go strong men Good Times back to Stronger men or women I get that you know how right but that's why I have hope because we can teach this to families I get it you're trying to prevent what is but I also know the stats you're talking about like 67% of Jenzy thinks that we're in late stage capitalism think about that for a second also like 70% also having anxiety anxiety correlated they're correlated yeah the most was like 20% before something extremely it's like over half of them have anxiety yep about what 41%

think they'll never own a home 20 years old like how do you what are you worried about yeah it's you don't even have problems yet anxiety comes when capabilities far out strip confidence in The world that's how anxiety is created so they don't have skills that's their problem no no they they have skills they don't have the confidence to actually put them out in the world and create value I've never seen anybody who's anxious that's serving somebody else and creating value in the world it erases it but when people have like I see this with

teenage girls that we work with all the time talented gifted capable strong no confidence they the social media The Bullying the clicks the popularity the the body image it just kills that confidence right so they'll never let the capabilities Thrive to create value for people that's where anxiety comes and I get it and that's why like I it sounds like I'm hating on gen Z but it's just like the reason I guess I'm pessimistic yeah is because just the stats are the stats like this is where they're at today and they grew up in this

era of social media With comparison yeah with you know they have more tools than ever right but they also have more you know just comparison than ever yeah and I think for for families listening to this or young people listening like the fun thing about stats is that it's a choice to live in them or not so that someone listening to this with kids is like oh I can choose a different path right yeah I can choose a different way to grow up somebody who's Listen to this with a business oh I can choose a

different way to do it oh yeah right so I think you're right there's every generation has its crazy I mean look Millennials got had that reputation you and I had that reputation for a decade yeah but I guess my point getting back to Parenting was that Millennials were the first to wait to get married and we're starting to now see as 30s somethings the the problems that that poses now y because we were Fed this lie that hey you know wait until you're ready you know get financially stable do this thing that thing blah blah

blah right and then now they're like why can't I find a spouse and it's like bro yep okay yeah so now I don't know that Jen will learn from that I think gen Z will probably because they're so anxious because they're so not confident you can't get married if you're not confident you're just not going to date Yeah you're not going to meet anybody yeah so like I don't playing twitch video games in your basement that's why I'm saying like I think that it it'll take a generation to you know my kids now you know

they're they're 5 years old it's like all right we're going to get to see the fruits of that ideology and I think that they're going to say yeah no that ain't for me man I'm not going to end up like Uncle Vinnie uh can't find anyone yeah at 40 I I would argue we had The uh I heard this a couple weeks ago Real Estate Investors I found a brand new way to create cash flow that's better than anything else I've ever done it's better than rental properties Airbnb my flipping business multif family it's the

best thing we've done yet it is building an automated wholesale business now you might be saying Ryan how do you build an automated wholesale business well what if you had the same exact leads that I Get every single month what if you had a script that was so easy to close deals over the phone that you could do it all across the country and what if you could sell your deals directly on the MLS without a real estate license and without having to actually own the property and getting top dollar well we do that with

this new method and I made an 11-minute video where I go over how it all works how you can start doing it today so if you want to go see that Video go to wealthy investor.com go click the case study and see what I'm talking about us Millennials had the last great childhood no phones yeah no like you were outside playing it was great it was awesome yeah like I don't know about you I didn't I didn't get my first phone till like you know late teenage almost College I was like 13 yeah 13 okay

13 14 we didn't have that right how old are you 38 okay I'm 35 so we got him like at the same Time then yep I was going to college but I had that childhood that was just like free hanging out real communication in person outside learning all these capabilities and skills like I think it this really comes back to what I said earlier we just can't Outsource our parenting like every families do this all the time they they Outsource faith building to church they Outsource education to school they Outsource character to sports right Right

that is not how this stuff is trained it's at home you you can't Outsource parenting and and we try to do that so many times yeah you know I talked to so many families that tried to do all that stuff the whole time their kids were growing up and then all of a sudden kids are in their 20s and they cast aside all that stuff dude you know I I had this I've said this before but let's say there are four main um things that you can control in your life that You're you're constantly trying

to get better right so there's your faith your spirituality there is your money there is your relationships and then there is your health right those would be like the four core components of life and it's funny because we spend the most time trying to make money like hours wise we spend more time working than everything else and it just is what it is for most people and they will continue because you have to make money To survive it's it's it is what it is your health cannot be outsourced yep nobody's going to go put you

know work out or eat for you you have to do it your faith cannot be outsourced only you can have a relationship with God nobody's going to do it for you um your Rel or your relationships can't be outsourced I can't be like you know what Scott I'm going to send somebody in my place and they're going to hang out with you today my EA is going to go to my EA Is going to hang out with you like it's all good they represent me um you can't you know same thing like your kids you

can't Outsource parenting you can't Outsource my relationship with my wife that ain't going to be good yep so the only thing we can actually Outsource is money y we can totally Outsource making money and delegating we can build business we can make investments money is the only one that does not require you for it to grow and Thrive right now It does you know you got to learn skills you got to build the thing you got to like build the machine and so it's not like you can just get it tomorrow but in time it

can Outsource right whereas the other three will never in your life yep be outsourced yet we always pursue this thing of money yep and we're chasing it for reasons that we probably went through 30 years ago money trauma is crazy man I just started talking about this And it kind of spread all over the world like how you're raised around money literally dictates so many of your decisions your entire life yeah it's wild If people really look at it and I think that you know so here's an example you're raised with nothing right you're raised

uh paycheck to paycheck family argued over it struggled with money your whole life a lot of those parents grow up have kids and then want to give them everything pay for everything give them All the experiences buy them all the this stuff and then all of a sudden they're entitled and spoiled it's like they Teeter tottered the opposite way yeah and then vice versa if your silver spoon grow up had to Easy Like H these things then you're like oh my gosh my kids need more of the tough love they need more of like the

go get it like they just teeter totter every generation and these money traumas like attack you your entire life and the things your Parents said around money we can't afford this money doesn't grow on trees you're not worth that right I do you know how hard I work to get you this and you just blew it you took it for granted yeah these are the things kids report to us like that they that they hear in the home all the time this is why kids say I don't want to talk about money money is the

biggest fight in my house yeah right that's what Mo that's what the kids all told us when we did our huge surveys and So there's all these things that got to be unpacked with us like why are we doing money why are we creating money why are we creating value to earn money why are you working so hard on your life to do this like what is the thinking around this we have to get to the bottom of this trauma or else I think money trauma is one of the worst traumas because you're going to

wake up every day for the rest of your life and work for that trauma right that's the Problem yeah I agree it's it's something that obviously we're trying to solve now with kids so that you know they they understand value creation and they'll be well more e clipped whether they're entrepreneurs or employees or side hustles or whatever right but it also starts with us as parents so especially for those listening in who have young kids you need to understand value creation and money you know and even if your kids are older you could still Learn

value creation and money that's right you can learn that no you don't have to be a victim like you control how much value you put in the world yep and it starts with what you learn developing skills and that you know I said this before but it's like no like our time is not all equal you know like it's just not you you are worth a certain amount of money like the world has already placed a value on your worth of value you're putting in the world that's like You get paid based on the value

you put in the world that's just how it works now you know we're all made in God's image we're all um you know seemen the Same by God but in terms of how the world values you yeah like there's a dollar amount yeah yeah what we what we teach kids is hey first and foremost you were you were created with Incredible gifts and talents and skills and you are invaluable you are Priceless in God's sight there's nothing you can do to Change his love for you and the value he's placed on your life but God

also loves you too much to leave you there he wants you to go out and create value train and grow and serve and help and like use the gifts and talents he gave you like just use them it's a joyful thing to create value for other people yeah and so it really is about value and once a kid learns to create value in the world it gives them so much confidence for the future like we we do these Children's business fairs okay we started these like 12 years ago with my mentor out of Texas Jeff

sander for now there's 2,000 of these children's business fairs all over the world every year wow half a million kids a year go through this well they just make up a product okay I like this soap slime t-shirts paper airplanes and they come to our little fair you just set up tables in a booth at the local park and then you bring in a bunch of customers That they invite they invite their family and friends and everybody goes and buys stuff from the kids yeah it's so much fun they learn all these skills like profit

cost of goods marketing pitch sales like all of this they learn in like two two or three hours and they walk away with hundreds of dollars right when a kid earns a Dollar by creating value with something that they did with their own hands and feet they Skyrocket in capability and confidence and the Learning so that's why this is so important they're not going to fear the future if they go down this route they're not going to have the wrong relationship with money when they go down this route see because with the critics that we

get are parents that are like oh you just care about money actually no we are putting money in its proper place the other parents that criticize us are using money to buy stuff and bribe their kids and buy their Love and love and coers them that's what they're using money for they just don't realize it so money needs to have its proper place in your mind it's all gods God owns everything we're we're stewards and you need to have an open-hand view of it not a close fist view of it yeah see these are the

mindsets around money we got to have or it becomes an idol how do you integrate Faith with all of this right I mean we're you and I as Christians are talking about this and we Understand this but how does somebody function without they're like I don't believe that like I I do believe my money is mine yeah I mean so much of what we're talking about is practical wisdom um if you well if if you don't have if you think money is yours uh enjoy all those mental health problems like seriously like if you literally

live like closed fist I'm just going to get what I get it's it's mine you're going to live a life of like Secret fear right secret mistrust you will never admit it but you're going to create an idol for yourself that you're just trying to protect and secure at all times you'll not you will not have peace doesn't matter if you think you have 50 million sitting in an account and you're living in a mansion by yourself you will never have true peace yeah so it doesn't matter from the standpoint of whether you're a Christian

or not like you should just not live Like that no yeah look the whole point of being a Christian is saying I don't I choose not to be my own God I choose not to be in charge of everything I choose not to be um the person I get to serve all day every day right being a Christian says you know what I messed up there's a God of this universe who loves me and I'm going to serve him and hand things over to him and trust him and there's a freedom and A peace that

comes from that you know people think that Christians are only Christians because it's a get out of jail free card right like in Monopoly you get you go pass go get out of jail free card when you're dead like that's the the rep that Christians get I think that being a Christian is not just so God could L us into heaven being a Christian is is God opened the gates of hell and got us out that's really what it is yeah like it's for this life right Now to have freedom and peace and confidence in

that stuff like I know that money is in God's hands I don't have to worry about it like I don't have fear of people I don't have fear of man like those things are not in line with a strong faith the only piece I get is trusting that God has it all under control because if I'm in control it's constant anxiety and fear and struggles and like no thanks yeah how do you deal with Parenting especially when you're an entrepreneur and you're dealing with chaos every day you're dealing with fire after fire you know you've

you've founded a lot of companies you've shut down companies you've sold companies you know you've had to you know not know how you're going to make payroll the next week because you got to go raise another round like you in the tech space how do you how do you handle all that in dealing with four kids yeah not easy and I'm not sitting here saying I have it perfect I I'm a practitioner like I'm just learning all this stuff I I learned all this stuff about families just because of a hobby I wanted to learn

from the best families in the world just so that my family could get stronger right right because I was struggling so I'm a practitioner I'm not perfect in any any way but I I think with with our family it's really about time boxing and setting your priorities first right work Has to fill in the gaps work has to be it's it's it's in its own place right so here's what I think most of the world does this okay you ready yep most of the world goes I'm going to work my butt off uh I'm going

to try to be healthy uh I'm going to try to talk to my kids and then talk to my wife at the end of the day and then think about God with my last breath and go to bed right so it's really their priorities are work Health kids wife God right this is how it's supposed to be switch them it needs to be like God first spouse then kids then Health then let business fill in its proper place in the cracks yeah because then when you have your values and priorities set somehow business always gets

done it thrives it's blessed and anointed and unless you give it a proper place it will take over everything else yeah and so that's what we had to do it's like family stuff First our faith stuff first like like we put our travel in the calendar and date nights all that goes in there first yeah and yeah I work hard I work my butt off but it fills in the cracks of the other priorities yeah that's what that the whole point of creating the wealthy way and you know I talk about it in the book

but it's like all these years I decided that you know I was just going to work 9 to5 and that's it that's the parameter I'm not going to work on The weekends that's it that's the parameter and we've had success you know God's blessed it been able to have a great marriage and kids and do fun things go to Bandon Dunes you know like yep I get to do the things I want and it's not like I only did that after I had success yeah that is what produced success yeah and I look at you

know other people who followed to that and like at a at a extremely high level a company like Chick-fil-A that just says Hey these are our values we're not going to be open Sunday yep and we think that God's going to bless that and then all of a sudden they just smoke the competition it's not even close to you know on a per store basis what nobody's even close it's not even within like 3x yep Hobby Lobby did the same thing right they St they stood on business right on some of those political issues and

how they treat their employees and how they acted and they just they trampled over Like Michaels and and lawren all these other like Vari stores and dollar stores and and arts and craft stores now they've just launched their thousandth store you know over all these years and they're going to be giving away their a billion dollars this year unbelievable the culture that gets created when you stand on principle for these you would think a company like Hobby Lobby wouldn't be making it just like big box like selling little arts and crafts Unbelievable like I even

I am like how are they still in business like it doesn't make sense in today's economy world it's a full anointing I mean it's I I was there I got a tour of the backstage so David took us in the back um they have a they call it their home store no one goes in there as customers but it's it's the exact layout of the Thousand locations every aisle every SKU every product every book every plant it's all perfectly organized with a Daily printout get this you would be fascinated it's a daily print out of

exactly what it is the price how many were sold yesterday all around the country the total volume yesterday they replace all 4,000 every day in their home office in Oklahoma City and every Saturday for the last 60 50 60 years David Green who's now in the his 80s he walks through it for hours on Saturday mornings and he just stares at stuff and asks questions to like a few of his like Proteges and then they have like the size of this table they have a cardboard cutout of the entire layout of the store which is

then copied by all thousand stores around America America and he looks around it and he puts little sticky sticky notes on the aisles change SKU move it here top row here change this like he makes about 20 of those changes every Saturday cuz he's been a merchant for 60 years and it is fascinating he's like nobody wants this Let's make it in a less desirable Place everybody wants this let's and then he looks at it the next week and he he probably don't even need to look at before what happened he just knows he's like

I knew it he just knows it's unbelievable when you get world class at that and these little sticky notes that that one sticky note triggers an entire event around the entire company and and a thousand stores change that the next day that's crazy It's unbelievable to watch so I don't know how we got on that idea but I I think that is what happens over the Long Haul when you stand on your principles and your values um my grandpa I'll share this quick story you know I come from we're a little different I I I

came from I'm the fourth generation of like a lot of faith Heritage values success financially you know hundreds of millions to billions of dollars that they gave away to Ministry to widows and Orphans pretty simple this is going to widows and orphans not to ruin you guys and I got half of college paid for and I was so grateful and I have a I have a closer relationship to my family now than almost anybody does they protected our family Dynamic and relationship by doing that they sold they he built a um inner West Bank he

and my dad 90 branches exited to Wells Fargo for over a billion dollars my my grandpa was Ronald Reagan's Bank chair okay he they Were one of the top small businesses not just Banks top small businesses in America my grandpa invented the take two hours a week and go serve and we'll pay you for it Go serve a nonprofit go help with YMCA go helping the boys and girls go coach go help whatever they invented that in the 60s and they got all these Awards and so I just watched that my whole life they just

were anointed they were blessed they stood on these principles he my Grandpa was famous for saying if you can't get your job done by five I hired the wrong guy he thinks like I think yeah go home be with your family get your principles right yeah I've had over a thousand employees in all my companies every failure had a personal thing behind it personal issue marriage issue kid issue health issue personal issue all of my franchisees and Apex that didn't make it we had a very low failure rate but every Single franchise that didn't make

it always had a personal issue that caused that yeah in their work so that's why these priorities of like faith and marriage and kids and health need to be set up and and growing so that your business can then be anointed and Thrive yeah I agree it's like I tell if you got a marriage problem it's impossible for that not to affect your work you can't even think if you're fat and out of shape what are you going to do yeah like You just aren't going to execute cute at a high level yep he who

has a Thousand Dreams or he who has his health has a Thousand Dreams he who does not have his health has one to have his health yeah yeah these things if they're out of line man goodbye business I mean you we've we're married for a long time if you're anyone who's married knows this if you are struggling and you're fighting and you're having a conflict or a problem it's so hard to even think yeah make a Good decision in work or build something it's like no way this is hard right so these things that's why

you got to focus on those things how was it growing up so I mean obviously you grew up with wealth like how did your parents balance that with hey we have money so it's not like we're going to just have Scott do nothing like we're not going to not take him on family trips and he's going to grow up in a nice home he's going to grow up in An affluent area I'm sure you went to like private schools and other things so like how do you balance that with I mean if it goes back

to the gig system I get it but like you personally had to go through it growing up with wealth yeah and you seem all right yeah I'm all right uh yeah I mean our family out of everything we've learned our family did like 35 45% like did an awesome job and I'm a product of that right like I I am literally a product of like generations Of thinking this way and my family did an awesome job with a lot of this stuff I don't come from like I'm not like the rags to riches came from

terrible can't believe I got here but now I get to stand on their shoulders which is which is what everyone wants for their kids right right so I am I'm a product of a lot of this stuff but I never got handed the I I never got handed the fish we didn't go on crazy trips like I was in a normal school I went to public high School I did a private you know Christian young school but yeah I was shredding papers in the business at six years old my first business was eight years old

like I earned every spot on every team I was on my parents didn't pay for stuff we were in a small town right and we employed half the town so I was I had a I had a responsibility to carry on the Donald Nate and it was not to be spoiled and entitled and a jerk but why not go on nice trips and stuff Was that just something they didn't want to do like are you against that no I mean I don't know maybe it was the product of growing up in the 80s and 90s

there wasn't like yacht trips and all that kind of stuff like we would go to the lake you know we would do normal cool family stuff like I had a great great childhood like go to the lake you know we went we went to Vancouver we would we did a cruise on like a Disney cruise when I was like a teenager we had Fun stuff yeah but it wasn't like elaborate everyday kind of crazy things we had a good home yeah you know but my parents didn't want to leave from all of our close friends

that were in the neighborhood they chose the family of friends that really raised amazing kids together got it right and I'm living the same way my best friend lives next door yeah and we have kids the same age we got 12 businesses together like we I I'll never move man like that it's who Cares like this is important like the family you choose the way you raise your kids you're what you're saying is where you currently are you don't even want to leave you don't want to go on vacations and do those things yeah we

love taking our kids to fun stuff yeah right like they earned legol land this summer doing all their gigs so we're going to Legoland in a couple weeks for fall break but no like I wasn't I wasn't spoiled or entitled like my parents were Very clear they're like we created this and our job is to teach you to fish we love you too much to give you all of the um Spoils of this to spoil you right so let's say uh you're I didn't get nothing either I got some help yeah it's just there's a

difference between an I love you gift and a coasting gift that's the line yeah when a kid coasts with what you handle for them and pay for them or give them as they grow up that's a coasting gift that kills value creation And I love you gift says look your mom and I like or your dad and I we built this we love you we want you to know we love you and share some of these resources or we want to give together with you these are I love you gifts right so I we've gotten

those along the way but it's never an amount that would make US Coast yeah I guess um because there's a lot of people listening myself included who do like to go on vacation so like I'll give you another another That's a good thing by the way yeah I I think experiences are good I love experiences I'm all about them I think you should take your inheritance for your kids and spend a lot of it on Heritage building which is experience together and education together and like thinking through Heritage that's the thinking of using your resources

for that you want to know the best Legacy move I've seen with grandparents they they would pay for their kids and their Spouses to go on a week anniversary trip every year so instead of dying giving them millions right they're paying for their kids to go on an anniversary trip every week and taking the grandkids yeah that move is awesome yeah right if you're listening this and you're a grandparent I don't know how many grandparents you have listening but send this to grandparents it is unbelievable young parents are would love that oh for sure and

the grandparents connecting With the grandkids is so good for legacy take the money that you would just die and hand over and put it into that kind of stuff experiences like I'm all about that man like am and I do great experiences yeah this is the second time I've brought up this book because it keeps coming up in conversation but have you ever read a book called die with zero mhm yeah and it it's somewhat like that where it's just like yo don't well first off don't hand over a bunch of Money for the reasons

we're all discussing but also use that money to create experiences like experiences like you're talking about Stories the things we talk about those are far more valuable than the material things and everything else like that's how your kids are going to grow up that's what they're going to remember that's what creates Heritage it's not the Lamborghini yep it's the experiences and so it's more about what you it's more About what you leave in your kids than to them that's the point that's a bar the experiences the stories like those are that's what they're going to

talk about in 30 years yeah right and then if it's just the money and stuff I know a lot of people in their 50s and 60s that are trying to wait for their parents to die to get their stuff to get the stuff and they're fighting over it and the parents still have 10 20 years to live oh jeez Talk about entitlement yeah it's terrible a lot of parents think that entitlement only applies to Children this happens with adults all the time yeah like I see this a lot like they're waiting for someone to die

and they won't risk they won't take that opportunity they won't start that business they won't do that job they won't do that experience because they're going to say well it'll happen when I get the assets well you know what's Interesting my in my childhood um I would say I was definitely raised entitled um though I didn't turn out that way which was really hard to believe but like we I think Sports probably beat that out of you by the way yeah probably baseball beats entitlement out of everybody yeah there's so much failure especially minor to

Major like dude yeah I trust me I I failed so many times that I'm not I'm like hey this might not work it's all good um but Growing up you know like I said my parents were middle class um but what I didn't realize was they were very bad with money they were just always spending more than they had so they're racking up credit card debt they're racking up all these things and on the flip side for me I got a lot of experiences so you you said you went on a cruise once my memory

is I would go on a cruise every year and so we went on a cruise every year I got a ton of great Childhood memories with it we would go to California for baseball trips um if I needed the new glove or the next bat you know they would get me it they would sacrifice and do those things and so the way I grew up was in a way entitled but somehow I just had this inner desire to be great no matter what so I wanted to be a great player great at school like they

never had to worry about like you know dude this kid's not doing what he's supposed to do yeah entitle is just Entitlement only comes from solving all your kids' problems for them yeah they didn't solve my problems see that's different you should take your kids on awesome trips yeah like every family should take their kid on adventure trips coming of age trips like spiritual or service trips and trips that the kids plan themselves those are the types of experiences you want to have with your kids and do as many of those as you can do

yeah right I didn't go to like big Cruises but we went to Hawaii yeah you know we did mission trips all the time we would go feed the Homeless in downtown Seattle and that was the most trans informational thing I did Growing Up yep and that was the priority for the family so yeah I think entitlement only comes when you just solve all your kids problems for them until they're out on their own and then they're going to blame you the first time their problems come like that's what happens that's When you turn from entitlement

to victim every entitled kid turns into victim adult yeah if they if they don't get that worked you didn't have your problems all solved for you yeah and that's that's different yeah and that's also too you're making me now think about why I didn't end up that way and I think Sports had a thing to play with it cuz my dad never went to the coach and was like why is my son not playing put him in yeah like I remember I I started To get good when I was like 11 12 and started making

all-star teams and stuff and so I remember I tried out for my first travel ball team uh when I was 13 years old and I was clearly the best player like I just remember this and I didn't make the team and it was interesting because I didn't understand why I'm like dude I was like hitting home runs like I don't get it now you know obviously in hindsight like the coach's kid played shortstop and I Played Short Stop So same here Third Base yeah coach's kid was at third yeah like so now I understand why

but my dad didn't make this big deal out of it he didn't um you know go yell at the coach or badmouth or gossip he was like hey you know what are we going to do that's right you going to try out for another team you know you're not going to play in this team what are you going to do yep and so I try out for the next team And I make that team and you know that team actually has like two teams one's a team one's B team and I make the B team

and I'm like in my mind I know it's the B team but I'm like all right you know what I'm not on the A Team I already got you know I didn't make this team all good I'm getting reps I'm like I'm just going to go dominate with what the opportunity I have and so then you know the next year I make the a team and then I'm playing Short Stop on the a team and Then we play that old team and I'm freaking smacking those guys because I'm pissed about just this slight but but

in no way did my dad solve the problem for me he's just like yo what are you gonna do about it I I had I had such a similar story in baseball my freshman year of of high school I got the O Okay so I was a 580 batting average I played 14 years of baseball ended up playing tennis in college instead and went that route yeah but I loved baseball Third Base um I got The award at the end of the season for making the fat kid on the team look fast cuz I was

late to puberty slower Runner I was really good handy coordination but like a little bit thicker yeah I got that award in front of all of the varsity JVC team Families 2 200 family it was crazy I was like the most embarrassed that was the award I got with the highest batting average in most RBI as a freshman we get home my mom's livid didn't say anything to the Coach didn't say anything my dad I'm I'm just like almost in ears like embarrassed and my dad looks at me and he goes so what do you

want to do about it yeah and I go I'm G to be the fastest kid on the team next year so he goes okay follow me so we lived we lived up in Woodby Island on a on a on a little island so there's Beach everywhere so right in front of our house is uh Oak Harbor Beach and he grabs a giant 100 pound log off the Beach drills a hole in it puts a rope around it and a harness around my shoulders yeah and he goes haul this as fast as you can 500 y

500 yard down the beach and 500 yard back every day and you'll be the fastest kid next year and I did it mhm every day and the next year I was the fastest second fastest kid on the team varsity because of the only kid faster than me was uh Adam Diaz who went up do D1 track like but that was the thinking like my dad didn't go cuss out The coach and say oh whoo is me kind of thing he's like what you gonna do about it exactly that's what it's such a good that's is

why kids need moms and dads yeah right like it's such your mom would have C you know she hug me and wrote a letter wrote a letter like yeah my son B at 580 tell the truth yeah yeah he is the slowest but still yeah kids need moms and dads what do you think about uh Mom's roles in the household I think they're both critical I mean like you a an advocate for stay-at-home moms yeah okay absolutely I mean I know a lot of families where both mom and dad work you know it's a different

Dynamic but they make it work yeah in a lot of good ways um I I know a lot of families where one of the members stays at home yeah with the kids I know in my case like in our family I wouldn't want anybody else Raising my kids than my wife exactly right like she is so nurturing so kind so caring and then like the like my leadership in the home is just so good together like my kids see like the leadership the healthy struggles with me like you know and then with my wife I

don't know they just kids need firm they need kind they need this balance yeah right like with moms your your your boys especially like that's your first love is your mom and they always have that Beautiful role but with dads especially your your sons will follow your example as a dad yeah and your daughters will marry it like that's why the both they're both so critical yeah I don't know what I would do if my wife wasn't with the kids um it's just like I don't even know like it's just it's crazy to think like

and and I feel for all the moms who have to work because of just income reasons and whatever and we're single moms and I'm Like man that's crazy like it's just so hard um and my hats off to a lot of those moms or dads I know dads that are single dads working it out right and yeah if I was a single dad having to raise my kids right even having money in businesses like I don't know what I would do I'd be like man like am I going to have to go get a nanny

who n to raise the kids cuz I I I don't have the capability to go do it like I have to be here right that's I mean that's what He's doing I mean it's so my hats off to parents that are wearing both hats yeah but I will say this like you have your family you're born with and you have the family you choose right an inner circle is critical for any family right think about that like who is close in your life are friends that are single parents like like we are jumping in we're

there they're part of our community they see us and our wives as like just part of the family right so you know anyone Who's single parenting it like there's get other men if you're a single mom have other men that you trust and respect Mentor your boys or girls like be a part of their life don't take pride in doing it alone that's right like seek out help both sides right like my buddy he's he's calling on the the wives of our group like hey can we help here can someone do the braid my daughter's

hair like yeah I know when my my wife so like Getting ready for church she's like yeah just like you know make sure Olivia's hair looks good and then she she's like what you what did you do and I'm like I don't know like I used a vacuum cleaner to suck it up and put a I brushed it and it's like it you know and then it's funny because like you said they need like coddling and they also need firmness and so now we're getting to that age where y i I'll come home and we're

at the dinner table and she's like All right Olivia tell tell Dad what you did yep I'm like what did you do and then I have to hear about it and then I'm like why'd you do that and it's just funny but last thing I want to say is so you know your company is called dinner table yep so people can where where can they find it yeah just dinner.com um or they can go to dinnertable family is our social media as a company and then I think by the time this comes out I'll have

my Scott Donal Pages up and running So we can co- poost on that stuff but okay and so they um you guys help families with this so that's where they would go yep simple coaching uh weekly PDFs help you implement our 12 to 18 strategies of Legacy yeah teach the financial skills the value creation the home economy all these things yeah so I would have to assume the dinner table is a big part of what you teach in your belief system like for me that's why I leave work at 5: because I want to have

Dinner with my family every night yep how important is is that I think it's being lost yeah most people don't do it one onethird of all new home furnishings being done right now in America Ops out of a dining room table what onethird Ops out they're like we're busy we got all the stuff going on there not enough family members like what happens to the dining room what is it filled with it's just empty it's empty it's like a shay Lounge it's crazy Dude and I think that the dinner table is where the most important

conversation in the world happen yeah this does not happen on the Dugout this doesn't happen at this the the classroom table or the classroom like desk yeah happens at the dinner table and I think we have to take that back like nuclear family dinner table you know actually taking not Outsourcing parenting anymore MH this is how you can transform the world focus on your family first yeah like it will be Best for you so that's why we call it dinner table and you know what's crazy is I was thinking about this concept the other day

but and happens to pastors it happens to entrepreneurs you know we we we start believing this lie that oh well dude you know I'm helping thousands of people right now I have my congregation I have my clients and you know I'm responsible for you know their well-being and success and then they neglect their family at at that cost Right and biblically we know that that's wrong you know in the Bible it talks about hey if your family is not an order you cannot lead you are not fit to lead yep nobody should listen to that

person they don't have Authority it's like listening to a broke person trying to teach you how to run a business like you have no Authority you cannot you are not equipped where do you think PKS come from pastor's kids yeah that whole reputation of a PK that went off the Rails and went crazy was unfortunately because of that and we believe the lie that these other people that we service or serve are more important and it's like they're not they're just not yeah you have to take care of what is in front of you your

family and if that's good the other stuff gets a lot easier that's my problem with social media by the way you got all these like people you have no idea what their private life is Actually like oh yeah that they are saying all these things on social media and they've got all these followers and stuff and you know I was with Brian uh Co kovi recently and we were talking he's got he's an unbelievable guy his dad wrote seven habits got it and uh he's in our private dinner table uh entrepreneur group and he basically

goes you know Scott I was thinking about this the other day never let your influence grow wider than your character is Deep and I went there are a lot of people on social media that have a wide influence without the depth of character so our my prayer since that conversation mons ago was Lord help me with character build my character right before any platform you know and our ours is recently blown up big time yeah and I just I'm focusing on the character side uh cuz that's critical especially for our kids like those priorities matter

the most nobody On their deathbed cares that they made another dollar or spent more time at work yep they care about the family the faith yep amen well guys hopefully you enjoyed this conversation I had a blast talking about it I've learned a lot so if you did make sure you subscribe and we'll catch on the next one peace