Wife and I Saved Money for 9 Years to Buy My Grandparents' Old House. At the Family BBQ, My Sister..

wife and I saved money for 9 years to buy my grandparents old house at the family Barbecue my sister suddenly claimed I promised to let her live there my 27f wife 30f and I recently closed on our Dreamhouse and it has the family torn years ago my grandparents own the family home but when they died unexpectedly with a lot of medical debt and expenses our family had to sell their house it was heartbreaking and sad and I decided as a small child that one day I would buy the house back I shared those dreams with

my sister I met my wife when I was 18 and she was 1 her parents owned a small rental that they allowed her to live in rentree just paying for the expenses she invited me to live with her a year into our relationship and we got married a year after that I told her about my dreams of owning my grandparents house and she fully supported me we began putting large amounts of money back for a down payment in the hopes that the house wouldn't go on the market before we could afford it because we didn't

pay rent and both had good jobs for our ages in the economy we lived and we were able to put back a very very large son of money my in-law has also offered us a sum of $75,000 for the down on payment and in total we put back about $185,000 about 20 years after my grandparents passed away their house finally went back on the market at a massive price the house itself is huge with six bedrooms a large Lakefront estate and several features including a pool and small guest house we knew that this house would

have a huge price tag and we skimped and budgeted for 9 years to afford my dream house my sister was also house shopping at this time but with a much smaller budget her and her husband have children student debt and rented for the past several years and were not able to put back money in the same way my wife and I were when our grandparents house went on the market I sent the link to my sister and said that we were finally getting our grandparents home back in the family she was very excited and said

as much and that was that my wife and I moved forward visiting with the owners and real estate agents having it inspected and made an offer they accepted and we were absolutely over the moon throughout this whole process my sister kept saying how excited she was to have the house back in the family and how nice it will be for her children to know this house and grow up in it like her and I did our grandparents house was the location of every birthday holiday gathering and reunion and my wife and I planned on making

it that way again which was why what my sister said didn't raise any red flags weird that she'd phrase it that way but not concerning we had a barbecue at my parents house to celebrate the final closing of our house during the dinner my Mill offered to kennel our dogs while we were in the stages of moving to keep things easier and them safe and that was when my sister piped up she asked why our dogs needed to be watched when the real issue was her kids my wife asked what she meant and she said

that her kids will need more supervision than our dogs and that she was confused as to why we'd be so busy that our dogs needed watching I told her I was the one confused I didn't know she was helping us move and that if her kids couldn't reliably be left to their own devices then she absolutely did not need to help us pack my sister proceeded to ask why my wife and I would be packing I told her the obvious we just closed in a house for length reasons I'll leave out a lot of the

back and forth but here's the gist of it my sister had it in her head that we were buying the house to either a rent to own it out to her family or be transfer the title to her name and have her pay us back in time yes that is literally what she was thinking despite us never discussing anything like that once when I told her that was not happening my sister through a fit she was pissed because this was her dream too and that it wasn't fair that only one of us could live it

that since she had children they deserve to grow up in the family home and what did my wife and I even need all that space for my wife told her that it isn't the family home anymore it wasn't left in a will we purchased it and now it is our home and we decide what we will do with it my sister told my wife to shut up and that she had no say in this family discussion I informed my sister that if she spoke to my wife that way again we would not be having any

kind of contact with her anymore that she doesn't get to assume we're giving her a house and then throw a hissy fit when she's put in her place and we left my in-law spoke to us on the matter a few times but all told us we were in the right and that my sister was very out of line I assumed everyone would agree but if they did I wouldn't be on this thread I got texts and voicemails from my parents saying that we were out of line threatening my sister they told me they were disappointed

in me for taking my sister's dream from her and that I don't have kids so I can't understand or want to provide them with a good home and childhood like she had that it's only fair we set up a way to give her the house and that we could afford to find something else even my more distant relatives have said that it was cruel of us to take that from her I'm honestly super shocked and taken aback entitled people thinking they should get their relatives houses but I never expected to live it this feels surreal

and I hate that we're starting this new chapter out on such a sour note edit while this blew up in such a short amount of time thank you for your support and if this continues to be interesting and not blow over I'll definitely update yes this unfortunately is a real situation and in case anyone is curious yes the house is big and expensive but it's severely outdated which is why the size and features don't exactly match the price in today's housing market like I don't think any owners after my grandparents renovated a single thing also

I am a woman LOL update one I can't read and respond to all of these comments but thank you I will continue to update but since posting yesterday morning not much had happened I will add a bit more of what's happened since the barbecue I haven't responded to any messages my family have left I honestly didn't think this was that big a deal but after scrolling through the comments for a while with my wife we're both taking this much more seriously a security system isn't an option at this moment the house needs too much work

at this moment to have cameras and such set up they'd be in the way if everything else being done we'd have to have them removed for several of the things we need done and we don't even have internet access at the property at this moment I will be scheduling meetings with some companies to start coming out and working on the property before we get to the Cosmetics however we do have someone coming out to change the locks on Thursday we won't be moving into the house for a bit since it needs so much work before

we're comfortable I've had a few people suggest the story is fake because the price of the house doesn't match the features the house needs a lot of work it hasn't been updated or worked on in years and the price reflects that also we are lucky to live in a state where property values haven't skyrocketed too bad comments lurker 78 info how much did the house cost if you put down almost $200,000 as a down payment NTA but your first mistake was sharing a listing with your sister oop the house was was a little over $800,000

but down payment itself was only about $100,000 the rest was used for closing costs moving costs and renovation SL updates it had a seriously dangerous deck that looked like it had been done by the homeowners that needs completely torn down and redone oop responds on getting a will in place regarding the house in case if she and her wife passes on that way her family cannot fight over the legal rights of the property oop honestly I never even thought of this I've always assumed wills and trusts were enough but this is a scary possibility thank

you and I will be strongly considering this update 2 July 30th 2024 thank you to everyone for being so supportive and offering advice to those who suggested getting a security system in place we are going to do that but the house is not in a place where a security system can be installed for the time being we're looking into getting some battery power trail cameras as suggested by one redditor I can't find your comment in the sea anymore but you know who you are we don't have to worry about internet access and they won't be

in the way of Renovations we are restoring the house back to its original Glory pre-c carpeted B BS and mismatched wallpaper besides fixing broken and upgrading old appliances we'll be having the floors redone paint wallpaper new windows and opening up some walls that shouldn't be there for the next 2 weeks my wife and I will be meeting with people coming out to work on electricity plumbing and a few other things and we do have a consultation with a home security company along with cameras we're looking to get alarms and door codes and set up an

access gate around the property one of those that needs either a passcode or to be let in by someone in the house we've already made an appointment to have the locks changed and aren't concerned about my family trying to squat there my in-laws have allowed us to park their camper trailer on the property while work is being done not only for peace of mind but to avoid commuting back and forth multiple times daily for the actual update I was hesitant to post this update since it's so soon after my original post but I guess enough

has happened for it to be useful information the events of the barbecue took place last week but I only got around to writing it all out yesterday I sent a message to my parents and siblings yesterday evening asking to meet up to talk things through and try and figure out what's wrong and what exactly the hell is happening earlier today my wife and I met my parents and my brother's family at his house before my sister arrived I let them know that if they tried to interrupt or control the conversation we would leave I told

them that I never once even suggested my sister would be allowed to rent out the house or buy it from us that you didn't know where she got the idea from and showed them the text strings where I first sent her the listing in every conversation where I updated her on the progress my mom asked to see the rest of the conversations about the house and I told her there were none she informed me that my sister told them all that we had made an agreement that my wife and I would purch purch it and

then rent it out to my wife's family until they'd paid enough to buy it that we would live in the guest house and they'd get the main house she told them that we had went back on our deal and had absolutely shattered her dreams of raising her kids in the house she grew up in we gave our side and it wasn't difficult at all to convince my parents that we were telling the truth with the lack of evidence on my sister's part and absolutely no legal documentation my parents didn't even attempt to try and back

up what she told them my parents were very apologetic and let us know that they never would have said those things to us had they known the truth and that they supported us 100% my brother was supportive of us as well but he was never one of the people harassing us over this so his reaction is less important around then my sister and her husband showed up my bill is a doormat and will give my sister whatever she wants so I wasn't expecting much from him I asked her to produce any of the necessary evidence

to prove that I told her we'd rent the house out to her that her lie was illc conceived and that she better have a good explanation she attempted to suggest that I had deleted the conversation but when she couldn't produce said messages either her story fell apart she started crying saying it wasn't fair that we got everything handed to us and that we didn't need a house this big and that we were rubbing our wealth in her face so to my understanding she thought she could trick everyone into bullying us into renting our house out

to her I guess like some kind of in the head Scooby-Doo villain instead of using ghost to scare us away she's using a fake rental agreement that she didn't even attempt to make look or sound legit we let her know that she had a lot of apologizing to do before we'd consider having a relationship with her moving forward and that she wouldn't be welcome in our home for a long time at the moment our relationship with my parents is Rocky at best for obvious reasons they let us know that they're here to support us if

we need moving Assistance or help with Renovations but it'll take some good hard thinking to decide if we're okay with that we will not be giving anyone in my family a spare key but my wife's parents will receive one for emergencies the house won't be in aate to host guests for a bit so we are choosing to cross the can my family be trusted at our home bridge when we come to it to answer some common questions I've noticed in the comments my sister obviously has some screws loose but my parents don't really coddle her

she's what you can consider The Golden Child and the baby but honestly most of her antics up until this point we're just one-upping achievements during our childhood or seeking more attention from our parents she's dramatic entitled and a little selfish but has never displayed this level of crazy before yes we will get a security system but not for a bit no my family will not be trusted with a key yes I am a woman I know it's crazy how can two women be married LOL my wife and I do not have kids and will not

have them in the future my sister has done some odd things but nothing is absolutely absurd as this we will be meeting with an estate planner to put everything into writing we plan on leaving the property to my sill and her kids with my Mill as the executive of our estate for the time being my sister and her family rent a small house in town they aren't struggling per se they each are college educated with good jobs but children are expensive and then adding in student debt and $2,000 a month in rent and you aren't

exactly living it up also there's a surprising amount of people mad at my wife and I for being rich we are not wealthy my in-laws are comfortable and are generous enough to allow us to occupy their rental at no charge they bought a new house decades ago and just didn't sell their previous one so they allowed my wife to live there the down payment was my wife's college fund from years ago her parents put money in it but when she decided to go into a trade they kept the money and saved it specifically for the

purpose of a down payment when we told them that the house was up for sale finally they offered the college fund they had kept for her we work good paying jobs but were able to save so much because we didn't have to pay two grand a month for housing we did skimp and save and we did damn well earn it we lived below our means and spent years forgoing any kind of luxuries to afford something we wanted so yeah not as drama filled as a lot of people were expecting or hoping I don't see this

as the end of it not at all but for the time being my wife and I are focusing on dealing with our new house and not my sister she's blocked on both our phones as of this morning and I'm not sure when I plan on unblocking her comments truecore truecore 1,593 leaving it to your sill is mad work you're closer to your sill than your sister oop the sister who attempted to trick bully and harass her way into taking the house we just bought and turned my entire family against us and my still is my

wife's sister so yes she's just as close to us as my sister closer after the stunt my sister just pulled latter silab 5,560 and I would have gotten away with the house if not for those meddling lesbians oop okay this one got me every day gal NTA your sister is delusional and has made up a narrative in her head that she is owed or entitled to certain privileges your parents are crazy for reinforcing that narrative to her good on you for taking your wife's side and not standing for the disrespect live it under Western 7133

NTA do not ever give your parents or sister a spare key or the door code ever now on to the next story story two x's new wife asked my daughter to call her mom when I talked to my daughter I found out a heartbreaking secret that changed everything I 27f and my ex 26 we have a sixo daughter together things weren't working for us so we broke up last year and decided to co-parent we both have custody he got married few months back I don't have any hard feelings or anything for him or his wife

he is a great father but his wife she's going around saying not only she became a wife but she got a Bonus daughter too last week my daughter was with her father and I saw his WhatsApp status a video she was asking my daughter to call her mom and saying how she just looks like her how people think she is her birth mother without second thought I called my daughter's father I was mad I had a fight with him and asked him to drop my daughter back to me and I don't regret it but everyone

is saying I'm overreacting okay maybe I'm but I can't see my daughter calling someone else her mom edit one she and my daughter doesn't look alike she was asking my daughter to call her mom when my child wasn't comfortable I don't hate her and I don't wish my child to hate her too I wish them to have a friendly relation where they can trust each other and be comfortable in each other's presence edit to thank you everyone for your response it means a lot genuinely I appreciate it I had a talk with my daughter once

I have a talk with my daughter's father I will update you guys comments nits bonus daughter is fine asking her to call her mom isn't help your daughter find a couple unique nicknames for her stepmother that no one else uses beer lie awake 2023 she's insane if she thinks that's even remotely appropriate I have a stepson and couldn't even imagine asking him to call me Mom especially when his mom is you know a wonderful and involved mom my husband wouldn't stand for it either because we all have a good relationship and even though they didn't

work out he still has respect for her as his son's mother update August 13th 2024 I made a post recently about how my ex's new wife asked my daughter to call her mom first of all I'm genuinely thankful to you guys I thought I was you overreacting acting and was going to leave the matter without doing anything I had a talk with my six yo and I'm shaking ran I my daughter thought I was going to abandon her can you believe I was dumb struck I felt like I have lost everything in my life my

lovely daughter light of my life she thinks I'm going to leave her I asked her why she thinks like that but she was adamant on not telling me after luring her I came to know her stepmother told her that when I will get a new husband I will leave her and make a new family that women she even said it's only her father who will be with her till end is she insane I told my daughter that I don't have any plans of getting married again and even if there's something like that I would never

leave her she going to always be my daughter truthfully speaking my daughter still is hesitant she still thinks I will leave her I've taken a week off me and D my daughter we are spending it together with my parents after the little vacation I'm getting a counselor for her I had a talk with my lawyer he said we got evidence and everything he can help me get full custody of my child I've no intention of dragging my ex to court again but if there's another incident like this I won't hesitate after this I had to

talk my ex alone I told him everything about how our daughter feels how his wife doesn't know her boundaries how he would feel if I asked my daughter to call a random man dad he said he had no idea things would turn like this he only left them alone with a purpose to bond I feeling he's lying I told him clearly that I won't let the women anywhere near my daughter and if he is against it we can just go to court for now we have decided that he can meet our daughter at his parents

house and after sometime if my daughter agrees he can take my daughter to his home it's his responsibility to not to let my kid alone with that woman I had a talk with that woman too she just started crying putting all blame on me saying I'm jealous of her having my husband why would I be jealous of someone having my ex I don't have any energy to waste on her Petty dramas about that women ey why she's doing all this I gave it a lot of thought and only came up with this apparently my ex-in-laws

are against this wedding so maybe she wants to get in their good side through my daughter or she's crazy I just want to make things right for my daughter I even came to know that my child thinks she's the reason for our divorce and many of you guys said he ex got married within year maybe he was cheating yes he was cheating I came to know about it recently and truthfully speaking I don't even want to confront him for this I want to leave him peacefully without much drama in life maybe someday I will ask

him get the answers I'm looking for but RN ASU want to focus on myself and my daughter again I am really thankful to you guys I never thought my daughter would think something like this if it wasn't you guys I if I would have ever came to know commets Jeepers Creeper 74 you're not overreacting you did everything right talk to your daughter talk to your lawyer spending time with your daughter setting up therapy talking to your ex and working out a plan that protects your daughter against further alienation through her stepmom your ex sounds like

a jerk in general but at least he's willing to work with you for now if his parents are against his new marriage you might want to make sure X Mill also knows about the situation and the deal you struck with your ex the only thing I think you could have done better is drive your ex to a vasectomy appointment because act two of this drama is going to occur when this woman has a child of her own with your ex and turns on your daughter oop I had a talk with his parents they said they

don't care about this guy anymore and they only agreed to let him enter their house because he's going to meet their granddaughter there moreover regarding vasectomy hahaha I don't think I can force him but I hope they can take responsibility if they have one