My husband's best friend son is getting touchy feely with my daughter and that wouldn't be a problem but I think my husband is his father so I don't know how to prevent them from going full on Alabama posted by us/ pych Factor this began as a dark intrusive thought that I could never shake off and over the years it has bloomed into a poisonous flower that infects my entire psyche I 42f am married to my husband Luke 43m and he Has a female best friend Amy 43f I met Luke in college but he's known Amy
since they were about seven they do everything together and understand each other implicitly they've always insisted that they are surrogate siblings naturally I as a new girlfriend felt a little threatened by Amy and her closeness to Luke but they both reassured me I had nothing to worry about that their bond was not romantic and had never been intimate that Amy Really was just the sister Luke never had I believed them and it didn't take long for me to forget any insecurity I had about Amy she became my friend too she officiated our wedding Luke and
I have built a wonderful life together and we've always had had a strong relationship after we got married and moved in together we still saw a lot of Amy and I was fine with that I've spent many nights on the town trying to help Amy find a man as she has always Lamented how unlucky she is in love Luke and I started having children after we were married and around the same time so did Amy for further context my children are Sophie 15 Owen 12 Louise 10 and Carter 6 Amy's children are Tom 17 haly
14 and the twins Adam and Jenna nine now Amy was not in a relationship at this point she was not married as far as I knew she was dating but not consistently as luuk and I had more kids and our family grew periodically Amy would find Herself pregnant as well this happened a few times and Luke and I never knew anything about the father or fathers in question I kind of assumed that maybe Amy was sleeping around and not keeping in contact with her one night stands Luke agreed this was probably the answer while I
did ask each time if Amy knew the paternity she always said no and she didn't seem that worried about the idea of raising kids on her own so I didn't Pastor her of course she had us to Support her so there was that while Amy never asked for any help Luke was never going to let his best friend struggle to stay afloat when she had children to raise financially we are very fortunate and privileged I have a job that pays handsomely and Luke also had wealthy parents who already knew and loved Amy so they were
happy to provide for her my in-laws defile stereotypes they are the kindest and gentlest people so we were able to support Amy get her somewhere to Stay with her kids people might be tempted to call her a leech but I never saw it that way none of us did she needed help and we could provide it I also know people are going to criticize her for her lack of responsibility and question why she never used more reliable birth control honestly that's a long story I don't want to get into because even I don't fully understand
her reasoning but it was quite important to her that she' never be on birth Control and that whenever came of that choice she would accept it wasn't religiously motivated I know that but it held that degree of significance to Amy she really did not want to take birth control she's explained it to me more than once but I'm still not clear on why of course with Amy being Luke's best friend since they were kids it's not unreasonable that they sometimes hang out together when I'm not there hey that's fine sometimes I hang out with Amy
one-on-one as well though Luke does it more often after all she was his friend first this included him going over to where she was staying and at times sleeping over there was I a fool to trust him and believe nothing was going on perhaps perhaps but for years they presented themselves as buddies like siblings I never picked up on any Vibes between them not ever as one might expect our children were brought up together not in the same house our home Is decently sized but even we don't have room for eight kids but we made
sure Amy's children met Ours from a young age and they always got along strong bonds of friendship have formed over the years which is good especially if I'm right and they share blood I've been dottling getting to the main point yes I have come to suspect that Luke fathered at least one of Amy's kids if not all of them frankly I do suspect they are all his I would never have believed my Husband to be capable of such a thing and he's given me no indication that he is the Unfaithful sort but he does spend
a lot of time with Amy and I have to confess I cannot remember ever seeing her with a real boyfriend over the years she would talk to men at bars and parties I would try to be her wingman and so on but nothing ever seemed to really happen so when she got pregnant the first time I was curious when it happened again and again I began began To wonder if she had some sort of secret fow she didn't want us to know about for whatever reason but I couldn't think of any reason why she would
hide him especially from her children after Carter our youngest was born Luke and I agreed that the time had come for him to have a vasectomy Amy's twins had arrived just a couple of years prior of course after the procedure Luke and I continued to make love but I no longer had to think about pregnancy meanwhile Amy Never got pregnant again after the twins is it a coincidence that Luke had a visectomy and then both of us stopped getting pregnant I don't know but Luke would still visit her and he wasn't just going to see
her but checking up on her children as well in general I should have paid more attention to it sooner but Luke has always acted like a father to them especially as they've gotten older he's the father they never had he doesn't neglect me or our children not One bit he's doing double duty on its own the idea that he is a surrogate father to Amy's fatherless children isn't inherently suspicious one could even call it Noble but it combines with a lot of other little things there is a appearance as well I won't go into specifics
of hair color I color or unique physical traits because I'd rather limit the identifying factors of the people involved and keep this whole thing as vague as possible but suffice It to say Amy's children they certainly look like they could be Luke's Kaylee has a very unusual allergy that Luke also has the twins look very much like him Adam in particular the older Tom gets the more I see Luke in his face and personality while their race doesn't matter the reality is that Luke is a different race than Amy and Amy's children look pretty biracial
I could easily believe their father is the same race as Luke that doesn't mean Luke has To be the father but it sure seems like it I have never voiced my anxieties to either Amy or Luke I don't want to be the bad guy and guilty or innocent I already know they would flatly deny my accusations and be hurt by them imagine if that drama reached the ears of my kids or Amy's kids either way Luke continues to spend time with Amy and her children just as her children spend time with mine I've hinted to
Luke that I feel needy for more attention and wish He wouldn't give as much to Amy but he either missed my cues or pretended to miss them I don't want to push the idea that he's favoring her because it's not even really true he's never neglected me for her I just can't shake the feeling that Luke and Amy have been intimate before likely numerous times as far as I know Amy never really wanted to be a mother either she wasn't opposed to it and when each of her children came into the world she instantly fell
in love With them but motherhood was never really a major part of her life plan or identity in the grand scheme of things when we would talk about the future she would sometimes mention a husband and children but it never seemed like something she had her heart particularly set on so I don't think this is a case of Luke just giving Amy children I doubt that was the motive for the infidelity that would have been a side effect I've been letting this go and turning a blind Eye for years it was a dark thought in
the back of my mind after kayle's allergy was discovered but I dismissed it it got worse after the Twins were born but again I dismissed it when Amy stopped having babies I wanted to feel reassured by that but Luke had gotten a vasectomy so if anything that made my anxiety worse there have been nights when I wish the Twins were younger that they had come along after Luke's procedure it's been twisting me into Knots for a long time but I don't want to be the one who rips our family apart especially since technically I could
be wrong except now I'm very afraid because in the last few months we've had a new development in our kids Social Circle Tom Amy's eldest asked Sophie out Sophie my eldest she's really blossomed over these last few years and has become quite the outspoken Beauty so I'm not shocked to see she's getting male attention but Tom asking her out Completely through me Sophie said no but only because I'm quite protective when it comes to her exploring dating and she knew she'd have to ask me first I could tell she was flattered and intrigued by his
interest and wanted to say yes she approached me to talk about it bless my girl she did everything right I think she expected I would see things her way and agree that she could date Tom much to her surprise I very firmly said no that caused a bit of conflict she didn't Even want to date him that badly she just couldn't understand why she wasn't allowed to and I couldn't explain it to her all I could come up with was he's too old for you which he is but it's not really about that when Amy
and Luke heard I was so curious to see what their reactions would be if either of them had agreed with Sophie and tried to convince me that the two of them should be allowed to date I think I would have been relieved and taken that as proof That I was wrong wrong about something going on between them wrong about who fathered Amy's children but the am uy continued they took my side both of them put their foot down though not as fiercely as I did Luke agreed with me but he also worried that trying to
forbid such a romance would only make Sophie want it more he's probably right about that Amy seemed more apathetic to the idea she didn't want Tom to date Sophie either and she backed me up but I Don't know she just wasn't taking it as seriously she seemed to think it was a fleeting Crush well it wasn't in the months following those conversations Tom has spent more and more time with Sophie they've been alone or with other friends whenever they possibly could it's become abundantly clear that Tom is crazy about Sophie and wants to be with
her and he definitely wants to be physical I've been watching them like a hawk and have noticed his eye wandering many times While I'm doing everything I can to nip this budding romance in the crib I also feel somewhat powerless Sophie hasn't outwardly defied me she's still just hanging out with Tom's friends forcing them to stop spending time together would seem unreasonable and probably encourage more sneaking around but I'm so afraid that they're already doing just that my nightmare is that they're secretly dating doing who knows what when no one is looking I've observed Tom
Being rather hansy with Sophie and she doesn't seem to object at all and I just don't know what to say I ha considered trying to convince Sophie that Tom is like her brother but if she doesn't see him that way I don't really have the power to rewrite their emotional dynamic or the history of their friendship I've always seen Amy and her children as being like family but my kids might see Amy's kids more as best friends the problem of course is that if I'm right If my husband has indeed been carrying on an affair
over the years and is the father of Amy's children then Tom and Sophie cannot be anything more than friends under any circumstances and of discussion it can never happen but I feel powerless to stop it Luke has apparently talked to Tom about this as as Amy but he is unrelenting and won't give up on Sophie I think she enjoys the attention and devotion Tom has even confronted me asking why I'm so against This when I know him well and know he would be good to Sophie I didn't know what to say other than to fall
back on her being too young for him but that won't work forever if God forbid they're still attracted to each other in a few years they'll pursue this with abandon and once they're legal adults there will be nothing I can do about it Amy and Luke agree with me that Tom cannot date Sophie but that's all they've really done they seem to feel just as powerless As I do to prevent Teen Love sometimes it genuinely feels like they've just given up choosing to bury their heads in the sand and hope the feelings pass as Tom
and Sophie get older sure they're in high school and it's unlikely Tom will be in love with Sophie forever but but my fear is that she'll let him do something intimate with her before that time comes something neither of them can take back I am this close to opening a door I cannot close this close to Screaming at Luke that none of this would be happening if he hadn't cheated on me all these years if he hadn't been all but raising a second family with his surrogate sister behind my back now Luke's son wants to
smash our daughter his actual sister because as far as he knows she's just his childhood friend and it's all Luke and Amy's fault for what they've done if I speak up everything gets blown to Hell on the off chance that I'm wrong I'll be a horrible Monster who accused the love of my life and one of my closest friends of doing something unforgivable if I'm right it still tears our entire structure apart the family and social unit we've built over the last several years will be gone and everyone will be stressed and upset even if
Luke and I don't divorce if I do nothing Sophie is eventually going to sleep with Tom and be his girlfriend and I'm terrified it will happen sooner rather than later or worse that it's Already happened under my nose I hope to hell this relationship Fades as they mature but what if it doesn't what if they stay together for years what if they marry and want to have children someday if I tell Sophie the truth about Amy's kids then everyone else will find out too and it will ruin so many lives it would shatter my kids
perception of their father and their Aunt Amy Luke is own's hero I can't even bear to think about how much this would Hurt him and what about Amy's children they are innocent in all of this they didn't choose where they came from and I don't want to hurt them even though I'm not happy with Tom at the moment a week ago I saw him put his hand on Sophie's thigh and I wanted to knock his teeth out he doesn't deserve the burden of knowing that the girl he's been fantasizing about is his half sister it's
also messed up and I don't know what to do I've been looking the other Way and letting my husband and his best friend insult me for such a long time I thought I could live with it but this situation with Tom and Sophie has me deeply distressed update 3 Days Later first of all wow I did not expect my post to get as much traction as it did I was half worried that someone in my family or Social Circle might find it especially when someone alerted me that the post had been shared on Facebook but
as far as I can tell no one in my family Has seen it I want to thank all of the kind commenters who wished me well to those who were more frustrated with my indecision I get it but I was dealing with an uncertain situation and the stakes were incredibly High I felt like no matter what choice I made something could and likely would go wrong I've spent the last 5 years imagining different scenarios based on various ways I could handle this if I ever decided to act on it to everyone who was Clamoring for
an update I have one for you I previously said that I was going to do a secret DNA test and had decided on that course of action in the end I couldn't go through with it and now I regret that because the window to do so has essentially closed it felt out of line for me to do that to another person's child behind their back ethically it was dicey I've since consulted with my lawyer as many commenters suggested and she advised me Against it because no matter the results it could make me look bad in
a potential divorce proceeding but I really wish I had done it anyway and just not told told anyone because I so badly need to know and I still don't know for sure likewise I wanted to tell Sophie in confidence but the more I thought about it even that seemed over the line it felt wrong to plant such ideas in her mind about her father without even talking to him first so what I ended up Doing was confronting Luke and Amy many comments suggested this as well I finally told both of them that we needed to
have a serious talk it felt counterproductive to approach just one of them because I figured they would tell the other in their own words before I could properly prepare I wanted them both to hear what I had to say once all the kids were at school I laid out all of my suspicions and the reasons for them I made it clear how much I love Both of them but that a combination of Clues had led me to notice the similarities between Luke and Amy's children and I didn't even list all of them in my original
post for example Luke has been a sleepwalker in the past and so have Sophie Tom and Adam I told them over and over how much they meant to me and how I didn't want to believe it but the thought had crept into my mind in the past how I had dismissed it before but now with Tom and Sophie Having crushes on each other it became necessary to ask the question so I asked if they had ever crossed the line if Luke had ever been unfaithful if there was even the slightest possibility that any of Amy's
children were his I was just trying not to cry they reacted exactly as I would have expected the responses were so perfect and well rehearsed that I genuinely can't tell if it was honest emotion or powerful gaslighting Amy was more abset than Luke At least more outwardly upset she was angry offended at the accusation Luke just seemed heartbroken by it maybe they were acting but I don't know somehow they had reasonable responses to all the points I brought up and they ask questions I didn't know how to answer why had I never objected to them
spending aone time together before and why did it suddenly bother me now do Amy's children really resemble Luke that much or are treats like hair color Pretty basic to share in common the whole family had always treated Amy and her kids as part of our unit and I had even commended Luke in the past for stepping up and being a father figure to Amy's kids since they didn't have one so why was I now saying it was a bad thing what exactly did I want them to do how could I think such a thing about
them and why had I waited so long to say something Luke was more understanding than Amy he respected my feelings or at Least he acted like he did Amy on the other hand seemed to feel more betrayed by what I said I ended up apologizing several times even though I'm not sure I did anything wrong Luke also apologized for anything he done that might have made me think he was unfaithful when I asked Amy more pointedly if not Luke then who had fathered her children she snapped back that it was none of my business I
could tell she was in no mood to get personal or vulnerable with me After my accusations I'm not proud to say that I lost my temper and said that after everything we had done for her and her children such information wasn't a lot to ask perhaps she owed it to us I regretted the words as soon as I said them Amy shouted back that I had never done anything for her that it was Luke and his parents who had kept her afloat all these years not me she launched into a longer tie raade accusing me
of always acting Superior to her I don't believe I Did that though it's possible I unintentionally gave off that bide Luke did his best to calm her down but the tension in the room was undeniable I don't know I just don't know it's driving me to the edge of Madness there is a way to be certain of course not certain of my husband's Fidelity but of the paternity of Amy's children so I asked Luke for my own peace of mind for the sake of our daughter and for our family unit if he could please get
a DNA Test done a paternity test I went on to explain that I knew he disliked and distrusted such things but I really needed this I could see the pain in Luke's eyes maybe it was an act but he seemed genuinely hurt that I was asking for this that his word that he had always been faithful wasn't enough for me but very reluctantly he agreed to participate in a DNA test unfortunately Amy did not agree and that's where we hit a roadblock I was afraid of this Amy Was infuriated at the entire concept and told
me in no uncertain terms that I would not be getting samples of her children's DNA she basically told me to go f myself for even asking I pressed Luke but honestly he was a bit useless in this situation though probably right he tried to convince Amy but she wouldn't hear of it when I pushed him for further support he kind of shrugged saying he couldn't force her to get the test done and he's right if she refuses That's really a dead end I've looked into it quite a bit and even consulted my lawyer there's no
way to proceed without Amy's cooperation the problem is Luke could in theory petition the court to demand a paternity test for and the others the issue is that to do this he'd essentially be admitting that he slept with Amy and believes her children could be his that would be the version of events he'd have to maintain but Luke has staunchly insisted that nothing ever Happened with Amy that he never cheated on me whether or not he's being honest about this is another story but he'd have to go on record making a claim that he isn't
prepared to make he is certain the children aren't his and has no intention of fighting for custody of them so even though a legal rout exists Luke won't pursue it because it would contradict his insistence on being faithful so no judge is going to compel Amy to submit DNA samples from her Children Tom is also old enough that his consent would be required and if both he and Amy refused to participate it's unlikely Luke would have a case he'd have to Target one of Amy's younger children like one of the twins but he doesn't want
to do that he's unwilling to take his best friend to court to prove something that in his words he already knows isn't true Luke is asking me to please let this go and trust him because pursuing it further will Fracture everything and according to my lawyer it's not realistic anyway for Luke to establish paternity he would have to admit to an affair in the first place and he's not willing to do that if he did that alone would be all the proof I needed to confirm my suspicions even if I would need more for a
court case I pressed Luke further about Tom and Sophie insisting that I didn't want them dating Luke agreed and apparently Amy still agrees Luke plans to have a Serious talk with Tom and go into protective Papa beir mode among other things he's going to remind Tom that once he turns 18 in a couple of months being intimate with Sophie will literally be a crime I wouldn't actually press charges as I know Tom wouldn't do anything against Sophie's will but I'm not above implying the threat and thankfully Luke isn't either I did ask Luke if he'd
be open to potentially swiping a sample of Tom's DNA for a Private paternity test but he was very hesitant like me he views it as unethical he also pointed out that if we did this and Amy found out it would likely mean the end of our friendship with her Luke believes that things are still in a salvageable state where Amy and I could reconcile and become friends again and I can see how much he wants that to happen but if I did a DNA test on Tom behind Amy's back and she found out she would
likely hit the roof and Honestly I wouldn't entirely blame her though I'd be very interested to see the results Luke ended up going to see Amy and spending the night I know you're probably cringing and throwing up your hands and trust me I wasn't happy about it either that was a very long conversation but he was adamant that he needed to perform damage control so they spent the night together with Luke insisting that nothing happened I didn't sleep a wink and kept texting him for Updates from what I can gather Amy will cool off but
she needs some time when Luke and I talked things over the next morning it was an emotionally fulfilling conversation we ended up agreeing to take the kids our kids not Amy to visit their grandparents for a few days it was an impromptu visit but we've done it before and they were delighted to have us I really just wanted our family to spend some time together away from Amy side of the family so to speak I always Love seeing my in-laws I refer to them as Jim 75m and Cat 67f I know Reddit is famous for
stories about the Mother-in-law from hell but in my life that couldn't be further from the truth I feel safe with them to the point that when they noticed how distant Luke and I seemed from each other I finally relented and confessed my fears I told them about my anxiety that I suspected Amy and Luke might be having an affair and that Amy's children could be his Here's where things got a little interesting when I told them what I was feeling cat gave Jim this pointed look and and let out a big traumatic sigh it turns
out cat has had similar misgivings to mine over the years she's genuinely suspected that Luke and Amy were closer than they'd ever admit and that they may have crossed the line in the past Jim on the other hand refuses to even entertain the idea he's always insisted that cat is seeing things that aren't there Maintaining that Luke and Amy are like siblings and would never do such a thing cat thinks his stance is naive pointing out that even though she and Jim had taken Amy in and loved her like a daughter that doesn't mean Luke
viewed her as a sister or that Amy viewed him as a brother Jim continued to insist that Luke and Amy have always been like siblings and I could tell he and cat had already had this conversation before they kept going in circles with cat Getting exasperated she pointed out that surrogate siblings or not Luke and Amy aren't actually brother and sister so nothing would have stopped them from being physical together if they felt mutual attraction at that point Jim just sighed and walked away from the conversation it became clear that cat has privately wondered for
years whether Amy's children might have been fed by this is part of why she has always treated them as her grandchildren to be Clear I never minded that I also don't fault cat for not voicing these concerns to me sooner she had no proof and she saw far less of Luke and 's closeness in our adult lives than I did as for the kids they're doing all right I don't know what Amy told her children but the general consensus the official version of events is that Amy and I had a fight and need to break
from each other that's what Luke and I told our children when they pressed for more details Luke Defended me and shut down further questions saying it wasn't their business I'm not sure if Amy stuck to that version but our children and hers still have each other's phone numbers and social media so they've presumably been in contact over the last couple of days I suspect my kids have kept Amy's kids in the loop with any updates and if Amy had told them anything significant they probably would have relayed that information to my children it's clear That
Sophie and Tom are still very close I did try to talk to Sophie about it more but the timing was off she rejected my counsel and interpreted my reinforced reluctance as being related to my fight with Amy Sophie insisted she wasn't dating Tom though I'm not entirely sure if that's true but she made it clear that she was going to remain close friends with him while she's not usually a disobedient child she put her foot down on this one to be fair I can't Really justify separating them or forbidding their friendship they've known each other
for years Luke agrees with me on not allowing them to date but he doesn't support the idea of preventing them from hanging out altogether I wish I had a more definitive update if anything significant happens in the next few days I'll let you all know I'm mostly just kicking myself for not going through with the secret DNA test even just for My own peace of mind now I feel like I've lost the only opportunity to get definitive proof one way or the other second update one day later I didn't expect to have another update so
soon but after posting my last one I did a lot of thinking about my kids I ultimately decided that whatever else happened I needed to warn Sophie about the situation and do so immediately to hell with what it meant for luk or the Fallout with the other kids so needed to Be aware of what she might be getting herself into so I discreetly kept Sophie out of school last night we went back home and this morning I dropped everyone else off but saved Sophie for last instead of taking her to school I drove past it
and told her we needed to talk that's always a frightening thing for a teenager to hear from a parent but I quickly reassured her that she wasn't in trouble I explained she needed to know the truth about why Amy and I were Fighting and why her dating time was out of the question I very gently told her that because of Luke's Clos to Amy and the Striking resemblance Tom Bears to him I had come to suspect that Luke and Amy may have been intimate at some point I explained that if there was any chance Tom's
father was actually Luke then her dating him would be a significant problem Sophie was quiet during all of this and even after I had stopped talking to let her respond she paused For quite a while before she finally said that we needed to get Tom and discuss this with him as well I had no objections so she texted him to meet with us they're both skipping school today but Sophie gets straight A and this is extremely important so I looked the other way Tom came to meet us and Sophie had me relay what I had
told her to him as well I apologized to him for any indication I might have given that I didn't think he was good enough for my Daughter and to both of them for not telling the truth sooner Tom and Sophie just gave each other this oddly knowing stare and that's when they blew my mind Sophie spoke first with Tom backing her up they revealed to me that in fact they had already known about Luke and Amy or at least they had strongly suspected apparently Tom had overheard conversations that were quite questionable as well as the
sounds of intimacy from Amy's room sounds he would Rather forget but all signs pointed to Amy's lover being Luke Tom had wondered for a very long time and back in January he finally voiced his fears to Sophie she agreed with him she had also noticed a strange sort of closeness between her father and his mother they agreed that Luke was likely having an affair they also agreed that because of kayle's allergy Luke might very well be her father and if Kaye was Luke's daughter the rest of Tom's siblings could be Luke's as well Tom could
be Luke's kid himself the math LED them to the same conclusions as mine so Sophie and Tom came up with a little plan as it turns out they are not in love they never were they're still just best friends but they had the same Instinct as me they didn't want to blow up our entire family and Social Circle without more direct evidence which Tom has been working on acquiring though Sophie very much wanted to tell me the truth she was hesitant Because she knew it would Shatter Me she had no idea I was already suffering
in silence Sophie apologized for not voicing her suspicions sooner honestly we both cried and I made sure she understood that none of this was her fault and that I loved her very much so the bottom line is Sophie and Tom already know they could be half siblings and aren't actually interested in being a couple that was their idea for how to rock the boat to force Luke and Amy to Do something about the situation rather than just keep making a fool of me I also think it was Tom and Sophie's way of punishing them for
their Affair teenagers can be vindictive so they concocted this idea that they wanted to date every flirtation and I witnessed every inappropriate touch apparently all staged and for the benefit of Luke Amy or both this was supposed to make them sweat and Sophie and Tom expected they would jump out of their seats to forbid It from happening when I was the one who did instead it kind of threw the kids for a loop they couldn't understand why I cared more than the actual cheaters they began to suspect that maybe I knew Tom confronting me that
one time about why can't I date Sophie was him trying to gauge if I knew or not maybe I shouldn't be surprised Sophie and Tom have always been close friends and confided in each other maybe I should be a little more concerned about how sneaky They'v been but honestly I'm just so relieved they're not dating sure they could be lying to throw off the scent I guess but they already knew they're likely related and didn't even blink when I told them we even had a bit of a laugh together when Tom mentioned how he had
been a little offended that I was so against him dating my daughter before I kind of jokingly asked him so you don't think she's gorgeous and Tom bless his heart Shrugged it off saying she is but So is my English teacher and I'm not asking her out either either way the question now is where to go from here we have to figure that out I will say it's such a relief to have told Sophie and I feel like an elephant has taken one of its feet off my chest having her in my corner and Tom
in my corner as well means a lot to me even though I've basically just had it confirmed that Luke is sleeping with Amy I kind of already knew that anyway so now it's Just a question of how to proceed Tom has already volunteered to submit his DNA so I can compare it to Luke's and both he and Sophie advised me not to tell Luke and Amy when I do this which I agree with they're both completely on my side which means more to me than I can ever express to them Tom has also been trying
to set up a camera in Amy's room to catch her and Luke in the ACT Sophie told me flat out that I needed to divorce her dad and hearing that from my Own daughter made it clearer than it's ever been she's right third update 2 Days Later first a few points to address from the comments I don't have any DNA test results back yet that can take weeks but now that I know Sophie is in no danger of dating a relative the pressure is off I'll get into this momentarily but it frankly no longer matters
if lukea the children I highly highly doubt my father-in-law is having an affair with Amy at worst he might Know or even just suspect the truth about Amy and Luke but it's also possible that he just refuses to believe they would do such a thing I've been vague about details for privacy but to put it very simply Jim and Amy are both pretty white cat and Luke are not had Jim fathered Amy's babies they would look different than they do nevertheless I do have an update first things first I discussed this in the comments but
our little team has supposedly recruited my Mother-in-law I say supposedly because Sophie and Tom were going to talk to her about getting help with submitting the DNA test and at the advice of my lawyer I am staying out of the process officially I told Sophie not to do it and she said she wouldn't my mother-in-law hasn't contacted me about it either though we have been in touch I'll get into that more in a moment the bottom line is that I can honestly say I had no knowledge of any DNA test another Bit of good news
I was digging through the paperwork in preparation for my divorce wanting to get a head start against Luke and one thing that came to my attention is that my name is on the paperwork for our home Luke's name is not I was the one who bought the house and we always planned to add Luke onto the paperwork at some point but we never got around to it and eventually the idea was forgotten it was my lawyer Paige who pointed this out to me and it felt like Finding a winning lottery ticket on the ground I
don't know where I'd be without Paige she's a dear friend from college who I reached out to too head in hand for help she's been there for me this past week not just as legal counsel but as the friend I really needed right now the thing is she's not our lawyer mine and Luke's we have our own family attorney who has helped us out of jams in the past we clashed with our HOA a few years ago not worth getting into Right now but Paige is a lawyer who specializes in family law and has handled
divorces before Luke remembers her from college and knows she went into law but doesn't know she's a divorce attorney so I can have her over for coffee like we're just catching up and he is no no idea anything is going on turns out he's not the only one who can hide someone under his spouse's nose under the guise of being a friend so onto the update the last time I looked At Luke's phone was 3 months ago around the time Sophie and Tom began claiming they wanted to date I found nothing while I know how
to search for recently deleted photos and didn't see any my comments taught me how to find recently deleted messages so when Luke was asleep I did just that I swiped his phone brought it downstairs and checked the recently deleted messages I'm glad I did but I also wish I hadn't because I'm still reeling from the pain sure enough A conversation with Amy had been deleted recent texts discussed the conflict between her and me with Amy describing me as a problem and Luke trying to pacify her without defending me at all to be clear they both
alluded to how they had expected this for a while and just hoped it would never happen presumably me accusing them of having an affair while the whole conversation and the fact that it was deleted was sketchy nothing was outright admitted so I Scrolled a bit higher to few days before the fight Amy's messages became a bit more flirty then I saw it 5 days before I confronted them Amy had sent Luca selfie wearing nothing guys I teared up I knew it was true I knew it in my bones but seeing the proof still cut me
like a hot knife I exited the messages app and checked Luke's recently deleted photos sure enough the same selfie was there along with others Amy and various poses to show off there were pictures of the Two of them together cuddled and pressed close like a couple in some of these she wasn't wearing anything in some they both weren't there were videos Amy sent Luke a video message of herself in her birthday suit and I had to actually hear her voice talking to him in a tone that made me sick about how she was sending him
a quick video to help him get through the day in more than one video she called him her boo and hearing her call him that I almost vomited I stopped Looking at that point I'd seen enough for about 5 minutes anyway then a strange compulsion to keep searching led me to check Luke's laptop I knew enough of his passcodes to access his I cloud storage and yeah basically more of the same there were letters long letters between them I didn't have the heart to read past the first few lines of one of them but I
did read Luke mention our children there were countless images of Amy selfies of them together videos Where Amy appeared to be touching herself and there were even smash tapes of the two of them Tom had previously offered to try and hide a camera in Amy's room but hell he never needed to Luke was hiding a whole Treasure Trove under my nose all along I scrolled and scrolled there were so many going back years not all of it was dirty there were some photos of Amy's kids too one video was of Kaye and the Twins playing
together when they were younger with Luke and Amy's voices behind the camera there were even old pictures of Luke and Amy from when they were younger I'd even say teenagers I snapped all these years I had been telling myself I had to be wrong that it couldn't be true well it was true I know no one forced me to look at as much of the evidence as I did but I'm still hurting very badly from having seen it and in that moment I wanted to act so I did I called Paige my lawyer it was
the middle of the night so I had to Call her twice but she picked up though I had woken her when I asked her to come by and said it was an emergency she agreed I also asked her to drw the paperwork and have it ready she told me she'd already had it prepared since I first reached out to her as I waited for her I went through the necessary channels on Luke's laptop to make sure he wouldn't be able to remotely disconnect our access to his little stash changing passwords and all all That Paige
arrived and I went outside to greet her in the car I spent a good half hour in the passenger seat just crying and she was great about that afterward I passed her Luke's phone and laptop with all the information she needed to use them she warned me that this could be considered theft so I ask her to forward and print out copies of everything she could and then bring the items back because I just couldn't bear to do it myself she agreed I went back inside and Then packed up Luke's things while the house slept
at one point Owen got up to use the bathroom and asked me what I was doing but I told him I was just cleaning Luke stirred once or twice while I was in the bedroom but didn't wake I got most of his things packed into trash bags and loaded up the car that's when I woke him up and told him to come outside he was confused and half asleep but he did notice things were missing I ignored his questions and just told him to come With me so he followed me outside once we were by
the car I pulled out the divorce papers and officially handed them to him that was when he figured out what I was doing and he tried to talk me out of it he tried to be sweet with me to be tender he kept insisting that he loved me that there had never been anything with Amy continually trying to persuade me not to tear our family apart even two weeks ago I might have wilted under him because the manipulation and Gaslighting were truly master class but I can see through it now I didn't tell him that
I knew he was full of it I didn't tell him what I had seen I just told him we were finished he tried a different approach he refused to go firmly stating that our children were his too and that even if we were separating I had no right to just decide the kids would stay with me over him this was when I very coldly presented the paperwork reminding him that the House is in my name and told him under no circumstances would my kids be staying with Amy he argued for a while longer but in
the end he decided to be the bigger person and keep the peace at that moment I didn't care where he went before he left he did ask about his phone and laptop and I waved him off by saying they were in one of the bags I couldn't sleep for the rest of that night I cried more eventually I realized I'd have to wake my children up early And explain as much as I could naturally I woke Sophie first I told her that I had kicked her father out and discovered evidence of an affair on his
devices I didn't specify what kind of evidence and she didn't ask I then woke up the others and gently told them that their dad had gone to stay somewhere else for a while I wasn't sure where but from now on things were going to be different Louise was the one to ask if we were getting divorced and I couldn't Lie to her I told her yes Owen asked when they could see their father again and I wanted to cry Sophie was a big help urging her siblings to be sympathetic to me right now and worry
about dad later I knew better than to poison them against their father Paige had warned me about that as well so I only told Sophie that the affair was confirmed as she had already been in the N however as the kids were getting ready for school Owen approached me and asked Point Blank if it was about Amy and if Luke was going to be with her instead of me I couldn't answer but I suppose that was an answer on its own I got the kids to school and my next step was calling to have the
locks changed I knew Luke would be back for his devices before long but thankfully paig returned with them before he showed up again it was a very quick visit she just told me that everything was accomplished and that she had records of everything we would need In court sure enough Luke turned up an hour later demanding to know where his laptop and phone were I had set them back in our bedroom like they had never moved and I just told him he had forgotten them he insisted that I had said they were in one of
the bags so I Shrugged him off and told him I must have been mistaken after he grabbed them he tried again to reason with me but I just showed him the door I knew the kids would start coming home from school soon And I think he was trying to delay leaving so he could see them I wasn't having it I started shouting again and sent him on his way I'm still in absolute pain and despair over what I saw I don't know if he'll realize that anyone went through his devices and made copies of the
evidence or if he suspects I saw anything but he didn't say so after he left I cried once again I talked to my mother-in-law that night apparently Luke did show up at his Parents house which surprised me since I was so certain he'd stay with Amy but maybe and he knows how suspicious that would look to the children and ends a want to rock the boat too much maybe he knows I'm more likely to let my children see their grandmother than Amy at this point and he wants to see them to give his version of
events that is not happening Kad already shared the version of events Luke told her in Jim he claims I'm having some kind of mental breakdown That he wishes he could help me but my paranoia is causing me to lash out and turn violent I was never violent I shoved him away when he tried to hold me that's all what's so hilarious is that he didn't mention Amy at all to his parents he didn't even frame it as me falsely believing he was having an affair even though that's his story when talking to me he left
Amy out of it entirely when talking to his parents cat noticed that she believes me Jim doesn't Know what to believe anymore according to cat he seemed very troubled by what he heard from all sides as for Amy she's been radio silent Tom has told Sophie that she's acting like nothing is wrong but is clearly stressed out when her children ask she makes similar claims that I'm having some kind of emotional or nervous breakdown in pushing her and luk away she doesn't mention anything about my accusing them of an affair but still puts it all
on me Amy hasn't Reached out to talk to me directly and I haven't tried talking to her since our big argument I haven't told my kids much just that I'm having disagreements with Luke and Amy though I made it very clear it's not a question of my mental health honestly I think they all kind of know what's going on Sophie continues to be my rock as I try to be for her and the others and Tom continues to be our spy in the ranks right now my biggest regret is the stress this is causing the
Children which I knew it would but it still needed to be done my life has fallen apart but it was never my life fourth update 6 days later in my last post there were several criticisms toward paig you guys will like this update because as it turns out you weren't the only ones who had issues with her regarding the Deep being in my name it's not an absolute Hook Line and Sinker but Paige is convinced that combined with the fact that I've been The one paying the mortgage I stand a very good chance it could
be interpreted as common marital property but I'm going for primary custody with supervised visits anyway I'm playing hard ball some also questioned whether I should still be posting these but as long as it's Anonymous I'm in the clear it doesn't matter if someone who knows me could figure out I posted this I haven't used any real names or revealed my location or anything like that as for the laptop Even paig admitted that was questionable but technically I gave her permission and she was only doing what I could have done on my own I just really
didn't want to go through all of that content myself as for the divorce papers Paige had them filled out after I first contacted her my serving them to Luke was more ceremonial she still contacted him later to officially serve him and request his lawyers details but before he could respond I had already done something a Little sneaky I reached out to our family attorney the one who had always represented both me and during our marriage let's call him Zach he helped us out of a jam with a HOA a while back contrary to some of
the comment suggestions I can't just go around Consulting every lawyer in town to lock my husband out of hiring them that's considered B faith and judges don't look kindly on it however this was Zach he had been our attorney for years and I Felt I had just as much right to him as Luke did and I got there first so I was able to secure our family lawyer sack and met with both him and Paige and wow do they not like each other Zack brought up some of the same concerns mentioned in my comments arguing
that some of PA's actions were in the gray area and urging me to hire him instead for the divorce this caused a bit of tension as paig specializes in family law and this is her expertise So I've decided to consult both of them moving forward interestingly Zach actually thinks it's a good thing I made these posts as they can't do much other than prove my sanity when Luke and Amy try to argue otherwise overall I am doing better I've been talking to a friend in real life the mom of one of Sophie's friends I also
have therapy scheduled for myself and I intend to look into family therapy as well when my kids ask what's going on I simply tell Them that their father and I are having adult problems and it's nothing they need to worry about that worked for about a day Sophie warned me they were planning to confront me as a group and they did asking if Dad had cheated on me with Amy clearly they've been talking about it and maybe they've been wondering for longer than I anticipated even though I have absolute proof I was hesitant to tell
them as much and let me explain why I wouldn't Tell them about the explicit content I found I would simply say I discovered messages between Luke and Amy revealing their Affair but with the exception of Sophie I know they wouldn't be satisfied with that Carter curious little sweetheart that he is would likely want to see the messages himself so instead when my kids asked me directly if their dad had cheated on me I simply said I believe he did yes with as much sincerity as I could muster I think they Believe me Tom and Sophie
are texting Non-Stop and from what I can gather there's doubt among Amy's children as well they seem to question whether this is really about me losing my mind or about their mother being too close to my husband I think it's slowly sinking in for poor Jim that what he didn't want to believe is very much possible and it's happening I have I haven't shown him or cat any of the letters or anything like that since they're hosting Luke I Haven't had much contact with them at all but I did have one phone call with cat
where we wished each other well and that was nice in the background I could hear shouting and though cat quickly went outside I caught what sounded like Jim shouting at Luke Jim never usually shouts he's the calmest man I've ever met so in a way I'm worried about him but I'm also relieved that the wool is being pulled from his eyes according to cat Luke is still staunchly denying Everything he was pretty upset when he found out I had poached Zach though which gave me a bit of grim satisfaction the test results came back Sophie
and Tom tested their DNA against each other to see if they truly are blood siblings here's a surprise according to the test they're not they don't share any DNA to everyone who believed Jim had fed Amy's babies here is definitive proof that he did not because the test would have revealed that too but I never believed It anyway Sophie has her doubts and wonders if the results were faulty and if we should take another test to be absolutely certain but not really worried about that I'm more confused than anything I was so certain Tom had
to be Luke's son he was too now he doesn't know what to think and I don't either I obviously now know the affair happened in lasted years and I know from the letters that Kay is Luke's child or at least both he and Amy seem to believe She is which confirms they were intimate 15 years ago now I'm just wondering for Tom's sake who if not Luke is his father he does kind of look like Luke but that might just be coincidence in general everything was quiet for a a few days until it wasn't until
she finally showed her face my best friend Amy I'm so happy I installed ring cameras everywhere as you were about to understand sure enough Amy turned up on my doorstep and asked to talk she had a relaxed demeanor and Did not raise her voice assuming she was approaching me on Luke's behalf I told her that I wasn't interested in talking to her and to just go away she did not leave but she didn't make a scene either she persisted in telling me we needed to have a conversation the kids weren't home and I did have
camera was inside I was also recording her on my phone and being discreet about it so eventually I relented and let her in I don't know if she realized she was on camera we sat Down on the couch and she instantly got into the reason for her visit turns out she and Luke know or suspect that I procured damning material from his laptop Amy accused me of going through his devices and told me that anything I found was not my business and that I needed to delete it that was all she had to say no
apology no admission of guilt didn't take responsibility for her own behavior here hell she might have known I was recording her because she didn't Even directly acknowledge what the sensitive material on Luke's laptop actually was so I confronted her letting out some of my anger I asked how she could have the nerve to make demands of me I asked her why she and Luke would do a thing like this in the first place why had they seem fit to spend all these years betraying me I posed the question that I've been wondering about for a
long time and as I expected I got no answer literally Amy didn't seem to Really hear me even as I confronted her she seemed seemed like she was stressed panicked even but she was keeping it under wraps she ignored my questions and accusations and just kept telling me to delete whatever content from Luke's laptop that I had she said that if I wanted to divorce Luke that was my call but not to drag her into it oh that made me so mad I kept my temper but I did snap back that she was already very
much in it Amy just kept repeating herself Telling me to delete whatever I found so I just refused I asked her Point Blank why I should why did I have any reason to Amy got more aggressive raising her voice she was trying to intimidate me but I held my ground she told me that this wasn't about me and that I needed to just do as she said that it was very important so I asked again why and yet again she would not answer so I asked her if Luke had sent her to do this or
if she had shown up on her own no answer To that either it was like talking to a brick wall so I asked her to leave just as I'd been afraid of she wouldn't go she refused to leave until I had deleted everything I'd found in front of her I couldn't help laughing I told her no that wasn't going to happen this was where I could see her starting to freak out more in another moment she got up ran into the other room and grabbed my laptop before I could stop her she smashed it on
the floor I really don't Know why she thought that would work or get her the outcome she wanted I think she was just panicking obviously I still have everything except now I need to buy a new laptop and sadly she did this out of the camera's frame but it's fine all of my important files are backed up and at that moment I was more concerned that Amy would do something else drastic she looked like she was going to have a breakdown I tried again very calmly to tell her that she needed to leave or I
Would call the police she refused again and just kept repeating her demand that I drop this whole cheating ankle and divorce Luke without trying to argue that an affair took place at that point I just stared at her the woman I had considered one of my dearest friends in all the world and I told her that I didn't owe her anything but she owed her children the truth that they had the right to know where they came from who Luke really was to them Amy bristled and Told me it was none of my business that
I didn't understand her family and I needed to back off she kept going back to this idea that I could divorce Luke but I must not claim he'd had an affair with her I just told her that I didn't need her permission to handle my divorce as I wanted and told her again to leave she got more and more desperate and her anger escalated to the point that she physically attacked me I did not expect her to actually do this I'm not much of A fighter but I do know the human body pretty well and
where it's weakest she hurt me pretty badly but I got her off me that part was entirely on camera and the whole audio was recorded on my phone she finally left after that and I immediately called to file a police report I had the strangest feeling she'd try something similar and wanted to beat her to the punch I was able to clean myself up by the time I had to face my kids and while I downplayed the story I Did not lie to them about why I had a black eye I told them for their
own safety to steer clear of Amy I also sent the footage to paig and Zach as well as pictures of my injured State before I cleaned up they've also printed out the letters that reference Kaye as Luke's child I really feel like Amy just screwed herself over on all this I don't know what her motives were was she protecting Luke was this his idea does she just really not want the world to Know she's a home wrecker as if people didn't know already the more of my Social Circle I talk to and in form of
the basics the more people are confessing that they had wondered in the past if Luke was cheating on me but didn't have any concrete proof I suppose Amy doesn't want her kids to know who fathered them which does line up but I'm still not sure about Tom I didn't ask Amy about him in particular fifth update 6 days later hey guys it's been a rough Week A lot has happened I don't really want to talk about all of it in detail so I'm going to keep this short I know I never shut up it's just
how I am but I'm going to be much more brief this time around Luke has a lawyer now I don't know him but he met with Zack and Paige to everyone saying I should have Amy arrested I probably could have if I had had shown the police the video instead I just sent it to my lawyer maybe this makes me foolish but even now I think Part of me is still trying to protect people I once loved and go easy on them but everything's been on hold for the past few days because Jim had a
heart attack I saw Luke and I saw Amy and Amy's kids at the funeral it was the first time we were all together since before all this happened nobody talked about what's going on short of Amy briefly apologizing for what happened before she did seem sincere I'll give her that but but I wasn't about to call Her out anyway Amy Luke and Cat all seemed pretty devastated I was too but we all agreed not to argue or talk about the divorce and to just let the day be a ceasefire to focus on Jim Luke and
I had a nice conversation about him I've been spending time with my kids and taking a couple of days off work I have enough on the back burner Luke also saw the kids twice before and after the funeral with me present it went well at my direction and Sophie's they didn't mention Amy and Luke didn't try anything funny with any of them I think he does miss them and hate that he can't see them thanks to all this the kids are also pretty upset about losing grandpa on top of not being able to see Dad
as much as before I don't think any of them blame me but that's far from the point frankly Carter slept in my bed the last three nights I'll get more into this in the future when I have the energy to talk about what's going on in more detail but Whoever suggested that cat lied about the test results was correct she never sent them in she confessed as much to me I guess she didn't feel comfortable going behind find her son's back but she felt comfortable lying to me to protect him until she didn't until she
felt guilty and she came clean under the circumstances I'm not angry with her but I know better than to trust her anymore as far as I know she did not tell Luke about the test but it means Tom could Still be Luke's son probably is my lawyers finished going through Luke and Amy's letters with a fine tooth comb the bottom line is they definitely found what it was that Amy didn't want me to see and I now completely understand why she was so panicked it has to do with why Amy and Luke didn't marry conventionally
they did something very bad but this is genuinely something that I'm not sure I should be talking about even on an anonymous internet post I Haven't even been able to collect my feelings about what Amy and Luke have done especially with everything else going on so I don't know if I should be more explicit I'm sorry I know that's not what anyone wanted to hear but please try to understand paig agreed with me that when in doubt don't post it I've told my lawyers to put a pin in it for now because I'm in no
fit state to figure out how to proceed with it or if I should use it against them I'm just Feeling like crap honestly it's difficult not to blame myself for Jim I can only imagine Luke and Amy are blaming themselves too I know they're bad people I don't forgive them but this tore them apart as it did me and I think all three of us feel like the divorce stressed Jim out to the point where it may have contributed he already had heart disease and in particular I blame myself for showing him what I showed
him I showed him proof of the affair shortly Before he died I'll be carrying that with me for a very long time even if if I shouldn't I'll update again whenever I do I'm sorry
