For me, pregnancy was a woman's thing, a female thing. Most people have this idea, that we cannot produce a child being transsexual. People assume we'll adopt.
Pray for me for Noah to come quickly. - It will. - I miss you.
After I started going out with trans women, I learned that this possibility existed, to have a mother for my child, that is genetically our child, you know? A DREAM COME TRUE Hello, my son. PREGNANT DAD This person carrying you is your dad.
ERIKA FERNANDES Businesswoman ROBERTO BETE Businessman This person carrying you is your dad. ROBERTO BETE Businessman ERIKA FERNANDES Businesswoman Much on the contrary of the stories we heard, ROBERTO BETE Businessman ERIKA FERNANDES Businesswoman that this was the mother's role! ROBERTO BETE Businessman ERIKA FERNANDES Businesswoman ROBERTO BETE Businessman ERIKA FERNANDES Businesswoman This time it's your dad who's carrying you.
ROBERTO BETE Businessman ERIKA FERNANDES Businesswoman This time it's your dad who's carrying you. He is an amazing person. And you'll never feel alone, because neither one of us will let this happen.
We wanted you so much. And we'll live for you now, right? So they called me and said, "We wanna tell you something, but you can't tell anyone.
" I asked, "What is it? " And he goes, "I'm pregnant. " So he called me.
NATALIA BETE TEIXEIRA Roberto's niece So he called me. "Add everyone to the call, I'm gonna say I'm pregnant. " NATALIA BETE TEIXEIRA Roberto's niece "Add everyone to the call, I'm gonna say I'm pregnant.
" I started adding. So we were like, "wait. " It took us a bit to understand that he was the pregnant person.
PAOLA BETE Roberto's sister It was bit surprising, "How so? " PAOLA BETE Roberto's sister It was bit surprising, "How so? " "Ah, you'll become parents?
" And he goes, "yeah, I'm pregnant. " And I was like. .
. It's rare to see stories and accounts of trans male pregnancies. It's so big, oh my God.
Me not wanting to get pregnant was not because I couldn't, 'cause I had the uterus and could get pregnant. Showing that we can get pregnant and still retain our masculinity and still be a man while pregnant, it messes with people's heads. I get a lot of messages from trans boys talking about it, that after hearing my story are considering getting pregnant.
I get many messages from trans girls saying, "ah, this new possibility of a family! " For trans women it was hard to be loved, or to love, we'd be kicked out of the house into prostitution, there were no stories of families, no possibility of building a family. First we thought, let's stop taking hormones, and when it happens, it happens.
That's it. As it was planned, we tried and tried and tried, for a whole year. And nothing happened.
And when we were about to give up. . .
No way. This can't be right. PREGNANT, 3+ So the next day we went to the lab, took the blood test, did the maths, and it was during a trip!
To Fortaleza. It was in Fortaleza. LABOR May 10, 2022 For how long have you known each other?
For three years. But we've been together for two and a half. - So Noah is a big gift?
- Yeah. We met on Instagram, started talking, and when she arrived from Rio The day she arrived she went to my place! I did.
I already wanted to get married, have a family. . .
- I had a whole plan! - That's Erika. She meets someone, falls in love, and already thinks of how many kids, where to live.
Yeah. You dip this part and lean on the bathtub. ANTENATAL WORKSHOP March 2022 He will be here, fastened.
ANTENATAL WORKSHOP March 2022 He will be here, fastened. After 18 months, on my third menstrual cycle, we managed to get pregnant. We both had been taking hormones for many years, so my uterus was very much asleep.
I fully cut the progesterone, the testosterone blockers, to start producing sperm again. A trans woman is a transvestite that uses feminizing hormones, which will make that person's body transform into what is standardly known as a female body. The hormones also greatly reduce her chances of impregnating someone.
And this process is reversible, that is, once the person stops taking the female hormones and the blockers, that testicle starts functioning and producing again. We are here at the CRT. For those who don't know, it's on Rua Santa Cruz, in São Paulo.
This is where I do my treatment with hormones. I started back in 2015. And in 2021 I'm here once again to do my prenatal.
How about the baby's things, is it all underway? Yes, it's all there. The bedroom is done.
What else? The clothes are all there. When they want the pregnancy they stop the meds, ARIANE DE CASTRO COELHO Obstetrics gynecologist and start menstruating as usual.
ARIANE DE CASTRO COELHO Obstetrics gynecologist and start menstruating as usual. That is, ovulating. So they become fertile.
Then there's the hormonal option, that we recommend to recover this capacity to get pregnant, which can be traumatic, seeing your body transforming. Your voice will not go back to what it was. That's irreversible.
But the body silhouette will change. So some alterations can cause psychological discomfort, dysphoria. The definition of doula is "to serve".
The doula is a do-it-all. The physical process, the mental process, the emotional one, the spiritual one. The doula helps putting together the birth plan, which is a document that we take to the hospital, and it contains all items that the person chooses related to the labor.
What we defined: I want to be addressed as the father and through male pronouns. Since Erika will nurse, we asked, if possible, DEFINITION OF THE BIRTH PLAN March 2022 for a more comfortable place where she can rest, DEFINITION OF THE BIRTH PLAN March 2022 so that she can nurse the baby. DEFINITION OF THE BIRTH PLAN March 2022 so that she can nurse the baby.
We're in a lactation induction process. So, this is the pump that pulls the milk. We fix this here, this part goes on the breast.
I have this bra that I use with the pump so I don't have to hold it with my hands. I can place them here. It massages the breasts to stimulate the ducts and then it starts the suction process for the breast milk.
Every human being with nipples has mammary glands. What makes the woman lactate and the man not are the hormones. With estrogen, progesterone and prolactin ANA THAIS VARGAS Gynecological endocrinologist With estrogen, progesterone and prolactin we are simulating a pregnancy in her body.
ANA THAIS VARGAS Gynecological endocrinologist we are simulating a pregnancy in her body. Because she's been using estrogen and progesterone for some time, she has already developed breast tissue, cells, ducts, everything we needed to have the milk to be produced and to flow. Even though we may think that hormones are a bomb for the body, it's not.
It's very low quantities, for a limited time, and only until we reach what we need. We won't go above that. I'll never forget Erika's appointment.
KELY CARVALHO Nursing consultant I'll never forget Erika's appointment. Her eyes glowed as she said, "I have to nurse! " KELY CARVALHO Nursing consultant "I need to be able to nurse my baby!
" KELY CARVALHO Nursing consultant You really could see the glow in her eyes, KELY CARVALHO Nursing consultant You really could see the glow in her eyes, precisely because she didn't know that it would be possible. People would say I'm crazy, that nursing is the worst part. It's worse than having the baby, it hurts.
I want this connection, to participate in my baby's evolution. It's important to point out that the milk that is induced is milk. Wonderful.
Alright? It's not artificial milk, it won't harm the baby. She stays with that thing all day long.
Three times a day. Beto and Erika did not bring me the challenge of fitting into society as a pregnant trans couple. And mainly for Beto, the challenge was to realize that being pregnant is something huge and to accept the changes in his body.
I can't do the things I love, like taking care of the house, of my business, because I can't exert myself nor carry weight, and my work has always been very physical. When there's a renovation to do, I never hire people, I've always done it myself. Seven years taking testosterone.
Then I stopped. When my testosterone levels went down, everything started changing. My mood, my routine, the way I feel things, I see things.
- What's the name? - Noah. As Noah starts going down during labor, he will stimulate and compress other tissues.
When we go get our ultrasounds, other tests. It's very new. So people react in shock, you can see it in their faces.
Our biggest challenge is with healthcare, to be able to get consultations. When we arrived the guard said, "You wait outside, only the patient comes in. " Then the receptionist realized I was the patient, we heard some chatter, some comments.
Then the doctor called us. I walked in with Erika. When I walked into the room she said, "Sir, only the patient, please.
" I just sat down on the chair. She said, "are you the patient? " I said, "yes, it's me.
" "Sorry! ", etc. The first crisis he had was right at the beginning.
He felt a very strong pain. We rushed to the hospital. We got to the triage, I said to the nurse: "My husband is outside, he's a trans man, he's pregnant, feeling a strong pain, he can't even stand.
" She just said, "Ok, where is she? " I said, "No, it's he. " When we got to the room she simply left.
And left us there. Didn't do his triage, we waited there for 10, 15, 20 minutes. No sign of her, he was in a lot of pain.
I said, "No. No way. " "Let's rush to another hospital.
" We were there on a Friday, street market day. ANTÔNIO APARECIDO BETE Roberto's brother JACQUELINE DA SILVA CALADO Roberto's sister-in-law We were there on a Friday, street market day. My condo has 10 towers.
JACQUELINE DA SILVA CALADO Roberto's sister-in-law ANTÔNIO APARECIDO BETE Roberto's brother We went downstairs, Beto and I. JACQUELINE DA SILVA CALADO Roberto's sister-in-law ANTÔNIO APARECIDO BETE Roberto's brother And Beto with that huge belly. JACQUELINE DA SILVA CALADO Roberto's sister-in-law ANTÔNIO APARECIDO BETE Roberto's brother The whole condo was trying to understand.
JACQUELINE DA SILVA CALADO Roberto's sister-in-law ANTÔNIO APARECIDO BETE Roberto's brother The whole condo was trying to understand. Whenever he put his hand like this I'd do the same, for the fun of it, to have matching bellies. He goes, "what are you doing?
" "We both have water bellies. Easier than explaining. " I don't use the priority lines.
Since the beginning of the pregnancy I spoke to Erika about this, that I wanted to avoid constraints and discomforts. It would take longer to explain to people that I was a pregnant man than to use the normal line. I have a 13-year-old son.
And he's always known my brother as brother. So I thought how the belly thing would be. And for him.
. . His uncle is pregnant.
But it's not something like, shocking, no, nothing. I think this comes more from me, for example, than from my children who have always known him for who he is. The haters appeared now, with the last photo shoots.
Some other newspapers published our photos. Some are very heavy, including Noah. "This kid will need a shrink later on.
" I commented, "he will need one because there are people like you. " The support network is very important. Support from our family, from our friends, it makes everything lighter.
And we start noticing it all less. The looks, the prejudice. If you're receiving love and affection, you expect that.
But when you don't get love, you only expect the opposite. I have to go now. Tell her to pray and give you her strength.
Mom, you had five natural childbirths! - I know. .
. - I'll tell you what, mom, That's why I am suffering here, I know you will suffer. I'll tell you what, mom, you're such a fighter.
This is Natalia, my niece. BELLY FAREWELL PARTY April 2022 This is Natalia, my niece. Paola, my older sister.
BELLY FAREWELL PARTY April 2022 Mika, our friend. BELLY FAREWELL PARTY April 2022 Erika, my wife! BELLY FAREWELL PARTY April 2022 Erika, my wife!
Everyone knows her. And I'm the pregnant man. It's the tree of life.
I am absolutely, absolutely sure that he will feel very, very, very welcomed. Very. And that his family will be very big.
And that he will have the world's best aunt. For me it's a very special thing. MIKAELA MOREIRA Noah's godmother For me it's a very special thing.
Very special. MIKAELA MOREIRA Noah's godmother To be a godmother being transgender, MIKAELA MOREIRA Noah's godmother to a couple that is transcendent. MIKAELA MOREIRA Noah's godmother to a couple that is transcendent.
It's very, very unique. I'm also happy that my son can have a friend who comes from a family that is not traditional. This is very important for him.
It will be very important for you, too. Sharing the pregnancy with them has been very special. PRISCILA TORRES Friend of the couple KAREN MARQUES Friend of the couple Sharing the pregnancy with them has been very special.
Precisely for that reason, it's something we don't usually see. We see other families, other pregnant women, but these families are normative. This child will grow in an environment where they will feel represented.
I won't say I was a prejudiced guy, but I used to make jokes all the time. From the outside it's funny, but when you feel it, it's different. Today she is the godfather.
I mean, he is. He is my daughter's godfather. And I knew that it had to come from within me.
not outside. I no longer see them as a trans couple. It's the person I love.
There's no such thing, trans or not. He's my son's uncle. My daughter's godfather.
On your uncle's belly. Open you hands. - Open them, open.
- Open your hands like this. - That's it. - Yes, stick them there.
So he's in the pelvis. For good. Ok?
There's just one bit of the cervix, if you picture the cervix here, the baby forces it, and it will open until it reaches 10 cm. Life is crazy now, so much to do. And the anticipation of that day arriving.
It's very diverse. What it will be like, what his face looks like. Fear of meeting him.
. . I don't know what I'm afraid of.
- Becoming a dad. - Yes. - Fear of the unknown.
- Yes. You already are a dad. My mom said he looks like me when I was born.
I was a huge baby. I was very big and fat. He has a big head.
Oh my God. But he'll look like me. Thank God.
He'll be my spitting image. You go to bed and wake up thinking, "today's the day". Sleep and wake up.
Then I feel colics. I can't sleep anymore. - I can't sleep.
- Erika is very anxious. - I suffer from anxiety. - As if she was gonna give birth.
I get anxiety crises. I think today is the day. Beto is having contractions.
Here's Vera. One more. LABOR May 10, 2022 - He's there already?
- Yes. LABOR May 10, 2022 - He's there already? - Yes.
- Is that his head? - Yes. It's his hair.
Oh my God, thank you Lord. I'm in the most powerful moment there can be in the world. The strength of the uterus is the most powerful one, Otherwise we wouldn't exist.
So what I'm doing is not a moment of weakness. On the contrary. It's nature's strongest moment.
During contractions we'll play tug of war. Arms stretched out and you pull me, ok? - Come, Noah!
- It's not coming. - Hi Noah! Congratulations!
Oh, my son! It's alright, my little one. Dad is here, son.
You made it, son. - Oh my God. - Little one.
We did it, son. Our little son. Go with you mom, son.
Would you like to sit there? - Mom is here. - Put him like this.
Mom is here. There. There.
There. They're a little disorganized at first, but they learn it. - He took it, look!
- How cute! There you go. That's it.
That's it.
