you laugh 4 times, you lose

[Applause] i look at my phone what's this [Applause] [Music] [Applause] yes mom i'm tiffany here with amt antm tv it's fashion week in paris can you say magnetic bruh that's valuable who wants a fajita i gotta go i'm thinking maybe forty dollars hey hey what's in your hands there's nothing in my hand what's in your hands nothing open your hands all right now break and chip resistant ready idiot you throw it hard enough i don't think there's a specific moment i think it's just like like things i've been through it's like very ingrained you know

it's hard to break out of that like it seems oh my gosh what is wow wearing lotion is actually a fantastic thing for you bro we're gonna put mine now well there's a couple over there this is my dog gus um i i i recently trained him how to bite balls so don't [ __ ] with me he's very good with intruders he he rips her nuts at clean up what are you looking at no why don't you do it [Music] what are you doing making a tick tock no one wants to see that michael

yeah this feels bright there you go enjoy that oil be filled with oil now how do i get oil in this thing oh there's a fill button oh yeah that's a lot easier okay period five sec oh [ __ ] damn grandma looking extra thick about to be a murder victim at least they got a handy pack a handicap part my balls are quite dry let's go let's go let's go let's go let's go oh oh my good guys my water my water you guys ever just forget how to walk i got this one i

should've thought the first dog on the [ __ ] camera what the [ __ ] is going on in 2021 already people bigger than dogs dude to the gym then you gotta miss skip to my lou over here i don't know what the [ __ ] is she doing but she gotta chill they got the [Music] dude it's only a dollar fifty for the hey let me get them in hey let me go let me hold one yeah right there what the dog doing don't worry i got this i'll just fix it real quick nothing

happened no gaming is intense but takis are seriously intense they're too many of them what are we going to do [Music] so this filter shows you your most searched thing on the internet every day so if you scroll in you can see that my most searched image is uh [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Laughter] legs why is it looking in shape [Laughter] [Music] if you eat this piece of pizza you don't make it into heaven [Music] [Music] i'm the only spiderman it's me only one there ever is uh hey five four three two one end up you've

been using your ears wrong i don't want to type this anymore can you do it for me [Music] [Applause] y'all the streets is crazy y'all somebody don't put a bounty on this lady head is nobody first birthday comes to my overlap let's go i'm going to try to make this as family friendly as possible so i have peanuts oh what is this in the corner of the mouth out here in the shed i'm going to have to send the puppy after it here we show you a close-up of a frog croaking good morning hold up

wait a minute right this is just a regular little gummy bear and i've decided to destroy it to do this i just have to get a vial and i'll add a small amount of something called potassium chlorate after that i just have to heat it up until it all melts into a nice goop at this point it should be pretty good and i can carefully drop in the poor little gummy bear on today's episode of how [ __ ] up is [ __ ] up that's [ __ ] up that powder said sheesh for the

pizza and then put a sign on the door that says scream shannon your pizza is here and don't ring the doorbell or knock our grandma is sleeping so the delivery guy did it thank you within just a few minutes though it was already melting and like everything else in life all good things must come to an end um excuse me miss yeah i was wondering if you wanted to do like an interview real quick it's just one question so okay all right i was just gonna ask you what is the scariest thing you've ever like

been through it's pretty tough but i think i'd have to say in 2018 my cat was ran over by a sheriff in town and no no no no no no what is that [Music] [Music] ah it's just an ordinary crabby oh really seriously this can't be my life bro really this you can't put air oh like this no it's not excuse me sir oh we're trying to find my friend could you uh announce it lou what's the guy's name again lou attention customers lou moosa come to the fitting room the party's waiting thank you all

right that should do it he should be in a minute okay sweet oh maybe he's with um is he with you his brother hugh he's with his brother hugh we could call that you yeah what's the last name janice okay attention customers can't you janus please come to the fitting room your party's waiting would you please come to the feeding room your party's waiting thank you he's not gonna come man he's definitely trying to try his dad he's with his dad what's his dad d one more try all right one more try he's adopted though

so the last name is different okay snuts this is last name d customer d snots please come to the fitting roll phase i should do it thank you [Music] what [Music] [Music] wait what do you mean small this is pretty average ed this is pretty average right actually it's underside oh no man that's huge [Music] okay [Music] what is it ah stop throwing the bag right now [Music] silly village versus the unmatched power of the sun let's go my name is you good friends whenever you buy a used car always pay attention to the gaps

in the door this is how you could tell if it's been in an accident or not everyone must try this cacho [Music] making toasty stacy without dying hey mia press y ah [Music] [Music] i want to paint my nails but all right eraser ready run run run run all right you all ready [ __ ] let me see whoa what the hell oh my god away oh man brother got the butterscotch i know they heavy brother you got the three inch if you jump in the water right now i'll give you dude i didn't finish

i know everyone knows a large at starbucks can fit into a small but mcdonald's actually doing the same thing check it out how does that work no not now what the [ __ ] we can find [Laughter] hey that way we can smack an actor with it and it won't kill him but if it did kill him i'd still get off scot-free how would you do that scott because there'd be no concrete evidence man hey good morning babe [Music] this is a simple lie detector i'll ask you a few yes or no questions and you

just answer truthfully do you understand yes [Music] let's see who i'll get oh what [Music] looking through all the course materials and i notice at the bottom it says exam answers not for students and i'm wondering is this a mistake so i click on it take your pickle thanks [Music] is i was just wondering if anyone else's cats do this like when you set them right down on his back like a baby he just sticks the leg straight up and his toes are even spread like i've never seen this before with any other cat wait

if you're there and i'm here and who the [ __ ] frying the rice no [ __ ] way [Music] bro i'm not gonna lie can you order for me why bro just please order for me bro you can order bro please don't [ __ ] order yourself you [ __ ] hi uh do you guys serve food are you [ __ ] feeling very generous today hey bro you paid for this yet okay i got you have a good one bro block the ball harper kick it [Music] i don't know about you guys but

the first thing what i do when i clock in when i go to work is i hide because they say good workers are hard to find and you know i'm a good worker [Music] no no no no no no no wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait he screamed [Music] oh god this better not be an explosive i was doing some gardening in my backyard today and i uncovered some sort of crazy secret concrete box in the ground found a handle after digging for a while and after digging for a bit more i uncovered

the second handle i kept going clean to the point where i could start to uh attempt to lift it up when i tried it was a little heavy so then i brought in the big guns and you'll never believe what i found [Music] my wife says she doesn't want anything for her birthday but look at her headphones she got the customer service 1998's it's missing a foam ear pad and she's literally holding it together with these old pieces of tape as an early birthday surprise i went to the store and got her a fresh roll

of tape [Applause] [Music] you think he's him duncan [Applause] hmm [Music] see where we're at dang it's all misty it's kind of nice up here though my son didn't understand why he was barking until he found out he was definitely scared of balloons the [ __ ] is phony what are you reading oh nothing nothing really just uh excuse me guys hang on i've been trying to reach you guys about your car extended warranty do you want to extend your car warranty at all no you're good you can just press two if you want to

be removed from the calling list thank yo i you them mirror yeah that's uh that's my damn avatar quack thanks for inviting me yeah yeah jump on in the water's five and i've been teaching the disciples all week it's nice to actually take a break and have a little fun [Laughter] really nailed that one i give you a room tour really quick okay so here's my bed okay um where are the blankets and the sheets oh i'm actually not allowed to have those anymore because last time they gave them to me i kind of tied

them together and tried to escape out the window so okay um let's unpack that who are you escaping from who's keeping you there um is he always there yeah just pretty much there every time we zoom just keeping an eye out yeah bing bing [Applause] [Music] that's my water bottle it's fair like animals cats elephants elephants yes i make a good elephant impression okay ready [Applause] [Music] nim's longest recorded sentence was give orange me give eat orange me eat orange give me eat orange give me you [Music] well so we all know we live in

a simulation right and we also know that everyone is controlled by individual computers right so what if smart people wear glasses because their motherboards are too busy making calculations to render the graphics think about it [Music] she looks exactly the same [Music] telling a job interviewer story that don't make sense y'all stay tuned so tell me a little bit about yourself um i just graduated from home last year ago my degree in walking face with a minor water in the snow because i'm mob air i'm also a dentist that fits his feet at the vet

when i'm while to sleep so i think this is all be pretty good for my mom since she doesn't have kids wait what are you talking about as i was saying i was saying that my my twin uncle was like walking meatless dogs right coming to find out the driver was wet from folding dishes because the kitten dogs was moving i don't think this is gonna work out this is not a good fit for our company and i would not hold your breath waiting for a phone call uh so do i start last year oh

god i'm not cleaning this don't freak out okay this is casper like this all right then let's get you out of here no uh i meant to use the physics tool uh okay no there's no controls eating that we're just gonna run now oh that's not so bad again yes oh yeah [Music] hiker better oh [Music] this friday kangaroo watching tv casual he's casually loving him bro what are you doing in here oh what dude you okay saved message received today at 9 50 7 a.m you really are a [ __ ] piece of [

__ ] on here superman to you happy birthday to you happy birthday future [Applause] [ __ ] foreign [Music] mom mom new [Applause] [Music] what i do what i do what i do back oh is he merely rocking on my ass is he milly rocking what the [ __ ] was that good morning everybody you already know what i'm about to be on so i don't give a [ __ ] about nothing you other [ __ ] yo like what the [ __ ] is you doing bro like peripheral like what are you doing you

got tats all on your face you look dirty as [ __ ] you need a haircut like what the [ __ ] is you doing bro do you even got a hundred dollars in your pocket do you like are you what are you doing like is you really out here getting for a [ __ ] dollar what car you drawing are you driving a [ __ ] or one of your [ __ ] [ __ ] like what are you doing and that chain it's not adding up like it's making your neck turn a different

color like i can get you a job do you want to work at walmart i can i can get you in there like they want they start at 11 now like we can really get you in there like what is you doing do you want to get some money do you want to get a real check hey girl up mango's here will they reverse terry oh lord hey man just three kicks out big guy come here baby call me later wow oh my gosh that was that was unbelievable right there okay now here we go

this is insane oh my gosh that's unbelievable i'll tell you what i might would i might kill myself [Applause] [Applause] it's over [Music] you do not bite no no are you done no this is the tiniest little shrimp i've ever seen it's so small ah still gonna eat it though hey y'all come look at this [Music] i have a question for god i like how the torpedoes are so slow it's like the crew probably has a few minutes to think about you're like ah at first they're like panicked damn that's tough you know what the

entire thing could just be described by that kid yelling at batteries i'm gonna hit a homer today hey who's that handsome guy hello 911 emergency there's a handsome guy in my house oh wait a second cancel that it's only me the story of my life is not for the faint of heart if somebody said it was a happy little tale if somebody told you i was just your average ordinary guy not a care in the world somebody lied oh boy yeah yeah is ursula get the hell out of here stop it damn door i'm gonna

put some dirt in your eyes [Music] [Music] oh [ __ ] [Music] look you all here's my chili uh corny long foot long as um um a chili dog doesn't that look delicious or what oh shit's locked what are we gonna do now i could probably help jesus how's it going [Music] [Music] [Music] you with me [Music] [Laughter] [Music] real bad [Music] [Applause] you don't have what it takes to kill me oh jax check out that car dude what was that [Music] bro i gotta have my pants tight so i can have my head up

and my glitch it took cuz i cannot be going out i hope you know that i sent this video to the police because we don't need any more gangsters and thugs like you on the streets it's too dangerous teleporter oh no white girls be like bro you know i'm loki yeah i mean you oh [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] but the way i see it lightning ain't gonna strike to say please boys [Music] i still don't think anybody can beat me at this game it's impossible i'm just too good come on now world record holder it's

too easy i think i figured out the trick to this too you pretty much just have to focus on one ball and keep your face straight and level watch this world record i guarantee you what are we gonna get a cup a couple hundred maybe maybe more it's just too easy look at this i don't even have to try look at that too easy wait wait too easy took me 846 minutes to get no questions right and on my first question my teacher answered lol so i was like what what did i have to do

to get an lol for an answer and i submitted this uh [Music] [Applause] [ __ ] [Music] okay [Music] [Music] i've got to get this pasta sauce to pour perfectly into this bowl let's get it all right do you think all women are thoughts no i don't think all women what do i have to do to get kicked out of this mall why you want to get kicked out oh man what's wrong with you you all right you don't want to get kicked out this is a fun place to come to are you going to

kick me out no for what i'm not gonna kick you out i'd like to see you here this is molly for you why would we want to kick you out of place that they built for you to come and relax and enjoy yourself you can come here sit down look at the people can i get a hug it can't be that bad this okay let's pour this bad boy i think i'm bout to steal hi can i get one non-alcoholic water and um is your travis scott burger hello yeah hi we don't serve [Music] [Music]

nothing like a good cold can of [Laughter] and these cookies rather be good as [ __ ] bro all right take a few glasses and apologize to us i'll say sorry but i'm not taking all my glasses why not because they're famous because your glasses are famous yeah why are your glasses famous i know everyone likes them so i know i'm not taking off you're pretty happy with the way you look and the attitude you've got are you yeah my parents aren't but i am okay cory we've got to wrap this up but what would

you say to other kids who were thinking of partying when their parents are out of town get me to do it for you get you to do it for you not don't do it no get me to do it for you best party ever so far that's what everyone's been saying so well we've got to go but i suggest you go away and uh take a good long hard look at yourself i have everyone has i love it attempted don't stretch don't horse fly don't ant don't as much wait your tempting ant is spending your

time so much you have so many horse flies in your tent i don't i don't don't don't don't don't know that [Music] wow [Music] i'm siri your virtual assistant i'm siri your virtual assistant right i'll tell you what your fat little [Music] watch another video for more funny memes thanks for watching