my name is Anna I am 37 years old I am married my husband's name is John and he is much older than me John is 59 years old we have been married for 19 years John and I have two daughters our first daughter is 18 years old our second daughter is only Oney old we live a simple life John works and I stay home I take care of the house and our children everything seemed fine but now my life is very sad and difficult one day I found out something very bad John has a girlfriend
I was very sad and shocked John is my husband we've been together for a long time I thought he loved me but now I am not sure I tried to talk to John about it I asked him John is this true do you have a girlfriend but he was angry he said you are making a problem for no reason but I knew it was true I knew Jon was hiding something I wanted to know more so one night I checked Jon's phone JN saw me and got very angry he shouted at me he said why
are you checking my phone you have no right I was scared but I needed answers later I looked at his phone bill I saw a strange phone number John called this number many times he called this number almost every day I called the number a woman answered she was John's girlfriend she is the same age as me she has a daughter and she is also married she told me it is not my problem if my husband finds out I was shocked I felt so sad my heart was broken I talked to John again I told
him I knew the truth but JN was angry again he said I will end it when I want you cannot tell me what to do I cried John cheated on me before this happened when our our first daughter was born now with our second daughter it is happening again I need him but he is with someone else I am on leave from work to take care of our baby I cannot go back to work yet we have a loan for our apartment the apartment is in my name but we pay for it together soon our
child payments will stop and we need Jon's money for our family John knows this so he feels powerful he thinks he can do whatever he wants he says he can even have another girlfriend if he wants he does not care about my feelings our older daughter tries to talk to him she says Dad this is wrong please stop but he gets angry he says bad words to her too he is hurting us all we feel very alone one day John stopped coming home at night he said he was working late but I did not believe
him he did not call me he did not send me any messages I stayed up all night waiting for him I was worried and scared in the morning he came home but he was angry he said stop asking me questions I am tired of this another day he told me he wanted to go on a trip I asked him can we go together but he said said no he wanted to go alone I was sad why did he want to go alone John also started spending a lot of money I noticed that we had less
money each month I asked him John where's the money going he said don't worry about it I will handle it but I was worried worried I checked our bank account I saw that he was spending money on gifts I saw that he was spending money at fancy restaurants I knew he was spending this money on his girlfriend now we have less money for our family we need money for our children we need money for our apartment but John does not care he only cares about his girlfriend the stress started to make me feel sick I
could not sleep I could not eat I felt tired all the time I went to the doctor and he told me you need to rest you are too stressed but how can I rest I have so many problems my husband has a girlfriend my family needs money I feel like I have no control over my life our older daughter is also feeling very sad she does not smile as much as she used to she does not want to talk to her friends she feels ashamed of her father she does not understand why he is doing
this our younger daughter is just a baby she does not know what is happening but I worry about her future I want her to have a happy family but right now our family is broken I told my best friend about my problems she said maybe you should leave John but I feel stuck I cannot leave him because we need him I cannot take care of the children alone I have no job right now I need his help my family also told me to be strong they said maybe Jon will change maybe he will come back
to you but I am not sure I am afraid that he will never change I am afraid that he will always choose his girlfriend over us I do not know what to do I am sad and feel very weak I still love John even with all this pain I want him to come back to our family I want him to remember us I want him to leave his girlfriend but I do not know if this will happen I feel lost I feel like I am in a dark place and I cannot find my way out
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