She Cheated So I SI*pt With ALL Of Her Friends.

She cheated so I slept with all of her friends my GF cheated I never let her forget to this day a good Revenge story gives me a warm bubbly feeling inside I believe it comes from this college experience years ago when I got revenge on my cheating girlfriend and it felt good I know I'm not supposed to enjoy it but I can't deny how satisfying it feels it's probably one of my favorite feelings in the world even though I'm Ashamed to admit it so I decided to write my first post about this because I don't

tell the story often it is so extensive and honestly just makes me look bad I'm going to try my best to not paint a picture where my ex looks as bad as possible and me as innocent as possible I want to write this accurately as I can even if it makes me look bad bit of context and backstory at the time of the story I played Division 1 NCAA basketball at a school so I traveled a Lot weekly in different cities and states and my entire life revolved around this during the events of the story

I was in the early stages of a horrible substance and alcohol habit years after this story I ended up getting sober and joined a program whose name you can find at the front of almost any phone book I am sure many people reading this are also sober and will understand how we addict slash alcoholics can be this story is an Effort to explain a character defect that manifested from the events in this story that lead me down a very dark path however I don't mean this story to come off in a self-pity kind of way

lastly I was always a good kid I was never troubled my upbringing was very difficult but I was able to keep an overall kindness in my spirit to other people and almost always did the right thing or took the high road when it came to dating I knew people cheated in Relationships but at the time of this story I always chalked it up to other people not doing things the way I did I never really thought it would happen to me I always thought that because I was a five-star boyfriend in my amazing choice in

women infidelity would never be a part of my dating journey I was a naive I really thought highly of myself and also had a real arrogance like any guy in his early 20s I guess the build up I was in my junior year in University I've Been single for about a year after me and my high school GF finally broke up after three years I checked that relationship off as my learning experience and I now knew what to look for in my next girlfriend the next woman I chose to have a relationship with I would

most likely marry and start my future with I know I was young and dumb and thought I knew everything LOL I had my eye on this girl at my school we will call her Lisa I saw Lisa around the Collegiate Athletic Facility the university team's training grounds and locker rooms Lisa ran for the track team and was damn good the various athletic teams often had parties and I knew that the first one I saw her and I would introduce myself and try to chatter up a bit and see where it led soon enough I see

Lisa at one of these parties and we pass each other on the stairs we make eye contact and she smiled at me I sparked a conversation With her and after going back and forth a bit we exchanged numbers We Begin the classic American style of flirting where we constantly just hint things back and forth indirectly we slowly progress the relationship in this manner for weeks sending texts back and forth hinting that we were interested in each other but also playing it cool to not let the other person know we had a crush on them at

the time she was on a break with her current boyfriend who was a popular Player on the football team she ended up leaving him completely to date me this should have been a red flag obviously but remember I had severe hubris at the time her leaving him to date me just gave me a superiority complex I was playing good in sport and if she was willing to leave this guy for me then she will never leave me for another guy lamao I was a f and gideot I can't express how much I was into Lisa

I was addictively attracted to her and had That weird feeling of I can't believe my crush is actually into me too I really was so drowned and blinded by my crush on her I missed so many red flags but our relationship began progressing really fast because of this I didn't really do a proper inventory on why I liked her so much fast forward like eight months later we are together officially Lisa has her own athlete's dorm room but I was a couple years older than her and was working during The Summer's full-time and part-time during

school season and had my own apartment near campus and Lisa was basically living with me she even would stay there when I was out of town which was like three or four days of every week because we were in season and the team was flying all over the country me and Lisa were deeply in love regardless at the end of the season I planned two massive back-to-back parties one was for my teammate's birthday Friday night and Then my birthday Saturday night they just happened to be one day after the other and luckily landed on a

Friday and Saturday night me and Lisa got drunk Friday night and had some unprotected sex Lisa kept a period tracking calendar app on her phone she was asleep and I drunkenly remembered she always marked down on her calendar when we had unprotected intimacy so she knew if she should be worried if she missed her Period she missed her period often because she was an athlete my inebriated brain thought she should put it in her calendar now because we would forget the next day since we were so [ __ ] up so I woke her up

and said can you put in that calendar that we had unprotected sex at this point it was like 5 a.m and we were that 5am kind of drunk where you're mostly just tired she unlocked her phone and opened the app and before she could even do it she fell back asleep so I Took the phone while it was still unlocked and proceeded too try and figure out how to put it in her calendar myself side note through our entire relationship Lisa went through my computer and phone constantly she was very insecure and always had her

suspicions I didn't care that she was doing this all the time she never found anything because I never did shady [ __ ] ever again looking back at this it's an obvious red flag I missed remember I Thought this girl would never cheat on me so this wasn't one of those stories where I went through her phone looking for something and subsequently finding it in this case I was innocently trying to navigate this damn period calendar while I was drunk and I was not suspicious at all when I looked at the period calendar app on

Lisa's phone I saw all kinds of little markers on different days of each month each marker was a different color so I opened one to See what the color coding meant I saw that red was obviously symboling her period and then there was also black markers that showed when she had unprotected sex this is when my heart sank into my stomach this FN calendar was peppered with black markers it looked like a checkerboard with only a handful of red pieces left and all the effing black ones there was black markers on dates that I was

in a different city playing basketball I proceeded to open all the black markers going back for our entire relationship we did not have unprotected intimacy very often maybe once or twice a month she had written the names of the guys she had unprotected intimacy with in the notes section of the black markers there was a total of four guys throughout the entirety of our relationship that she allowed to penetrate her raw some months there was almost a dozen of those effing black Markers sometimes there was two in one day looking back on this I wonder

if there were more unlisted men that I didn't see because she clearly only kept track of the guys in time she had unprotected sex in almost every story I hear of infidelity it involves the discovery of text messages being informed by a friend or the classic coming home early and catching your partner red-handed I on the other hand discovered a f ingwell documented Ledger Of almost every time she cheated and had unprotected sex amongst the four guys I discovered one of them was her ex that she originally left to date me cheating on me with

him was a common occurrence there was some other unknown guy she was also clearly sleeping with him regularly The Last Two Fellas looked to be just a one-time thing but again like I said these markers were just the time she had intimacy without a condom so who knows what the true story was there I sobered Up real quick I proceeded to look through Lisa's texts and calls and found nothing however at the time Android phones had a folder where you can see deleted texts but not the contents of the messages she had thousands of deleted

texts and calls but I couldn't see what they said but I saw the numbers and did a quick Facebook search and matched one with her ex in addition to something like half a dozen other random dudes the worst part was I found two of My teammates one guy I was actually pretty close with I just put the phone down after a few minutes the evidence was overwhelming the more it seemed to look at the phone the more my insides began to hurt I felt so defeated I can't fully describe the feeling but I'm sure anyone

reading this that caught a significant other cheating knows what I'm talking about I felt so stupid for trusting her and having no suspicions of her I couldn't stop thinking about how I regretted all the times that I had an opportunity to cheat and remain faithful to Lisa I felt like an idiot for not cheating her when I could have my loyalty felt like a waste I know it sounds ridiculous and irrelevant to the fact that she was unfaithful I think I obsessed over that because if I had cheated as well I wouldn't have hurt so

much in that moment all I could think about was about how much I was hurt I Would do anything to not feel the pain and embarrassment anymore question am I the only one who thought this way after catching their partner cheating I'm curious about this I proceeded to leave my apartment and go for a long walk I had never felt the emotions that were coming up and didn't know how to process them my ego felt like it was literally dismantled in front of me I wasn't sure what to do when I was too embarrassed to

tell anyone my sadness quickly turned to Anger I knew I was gonna get my revenge I just didn't know how yet I was seething with rage and wanted to make sure she never recovered from this my roommate slash teammate and best friend at the who was sleeping on the couch in my living room we will call him Bono an Eastern European kid who stood seven foot tall and was as Russian and demeanor as it you can imagine he also had an equally ridiculous RL name hence Bono well Bono called me shortly after I Started my

walk I answered and he asked where I was I asked him to keep this between us and told him what happened he stays on the phone and goes into my room and I hear him in his Russian accent yell at her yo [ __ ] you cheated on up then I faintly hear her and audibly say something in the background and him yelling at her to get out of the apartment after hearing some scuffling Bono gets back on the line and says yo she gone come back and let's talk I head back home and me

and Bono go over what had happened things don't get sappy because we are both complete alpha males who both come from cultures where men don't cry and neither of us really knew what to say or do in this situation he makes his best attempt to comfort me and says tonight is your birthday we gonna get [ __ ] up and find you some [ __ ] [ __ ] her I never liked her anyway oh yeah this day was my birthday forgot about that part Me and Bono go out for breakfast I am still a

little drunk my phone is blowing up with calls and texts from Lisa I tell her I saw everything on her phone and I can't stand to speak with her or look at her she keeps trying to convince me to let her come to my birthday party and I make it clear I don't want her there she clearly was concerned about exactly what Bono suggested to me earlier when me and him chatted Lisa's entire reputation and popularity revolved around the fact that She was dating me I think most people didn't like her in the first place

but put up with her because we were together she knew that if I acted single at my birthday party and she didn't show up everyone would know something was ask you I think Lisa was more worried about being embarrassed than our relationship I don't remember much of what happened that night but one of my friends sent me a little package for my birthday from California filled with some really good Weed hash moon rocks some pills and the devil's dandruff and I proceeded to do a glorious Swan Dive into an intoxicated Oblivion all I remember is

sitting on my chair at the pregame for my party there was two girls sitting on the arms of the chair and I still have a photo of that moment and I remember it vividly we were preparing to head out I had a few tables downtown at a popular nightclub the booze and substance swear the only thing that made me feel normal I had my son Glasses on and clearly had that happy loaded grin on my face the longer you look at the photo of me on that chair you can tell I'm hiding a huge amount

of hurt sitting on that chair the cocktail off substances start to take effect this was the first time I ever used substances not to party but to feel better to make me feel normal I remember thinking I want to feel this way for the rest of my life I am never going to hurt like that ever again with drugs I have Control and no one can hurt me again oh how ironic that turns out to be years down the line I told my teammates and friends that me and Lisa were done when they asked why

she wasn't at the party I didn't tell them why though I also didn't show them that I was affected by it in any way and just played it cool I tried to focus everyone on the party ahead of us the Revenge so this is one of those revenge stories where it was only half planned I knew I wanted to get Revenge on Lisa for hurting me so much but I kind of just improvised as opportunities came up my original kind Spirit had died at my birthday on that chair all my morals went out the window

I never cheated in relationships therefore I believed I would never get cheated on I realized now how dumb that is but that's what I thought at the time I didn't care what Collateral Damage I caused as long as my mission to hurt Lisa as much as possible was Accomplished so continued every day of my life with this new selfish mindset I was sitting at my computer later that next week skimming Facebook when I saw the profile of one of her track teammates on my feed that's when I had my first vengeful idea I decided I

was going to attempt to get her teammates to bite the bait that I was about to cast out into the water though I didn't have proof she hooked up with my teammates she was clearly trying to hide Conversations between them so I was going to see how many people who are close to here I could passionately hug luckily I had more options than she had when cheating on me a women's track team is much larger than a men's basketball team also much better looking Lisa's teammate I originally spotted on my Facebook had a boyfriend but

I thought clearly everyone cheats let's see if it's true I proceed to do the little flirty social media dance with her you Know the one where I like a couple of her photos she likes a couple of mine back I shoot her a message and Bam she's at my house in my bed about a week later I proceed to do something similar to other teammates of hers all on her 4x4 Relay Team coincidentally two of the three girls I passionately hugged at boyfriends and subsequently cheated on them with me which gave me some real mixed

emotions it stroked my broken ego and also made me bitter and sad giving Me one of those women ain't [ __ ] none of them are loyal attitudes this is such a typical story of while fighting monsters I became a monster this actually became my go-to strategy because it accomplished two things in my [ __ ] up mind it exposed a cheater but more importantly if they were willing to cheat on their boyfriends they would a be more secretive about it which meant the drama that would ensue when it came out would be elevated and

B it made me Feel better about Lisa cheating because it proved it wasn't me that was the problem it was women that were the problem I know it's [ __ ] up but that's what I thought back then I started to collect something from every girl that I hooked up with like a bra a pair of panties or some jewelry Etc not for some creepy reason but this is important later and was a part of my plan sometimes I didn't even have to try one girl left a pair of very distinguishable Shoes I knew Lisa

would know whose shoes they were they belonged to the girl that Lisa's ex-boyfriend rebounded with after Lisa and in broke up which highly upset her because it was her friend now it would upset her more because that same girl slept with both of her ex-boyfriends I especially tried to collect items if it was something that I knew Lisa could distinguish like a sweater from the women's track team with her teammate's name on it after some Time I had collected a boatload of [ __ ] after a couple months or so one of the Lisa's teammates

boyfriends found out about me and his girlfriend and it started a big beautiful dramatic explosion of series of events with her and her teammates this led to all of them finding out about one another's promiscuity the drama was massive even their coaches had to get involved it got so bad this made me feel so powerful and such an evil yet satisfying way I fell In love with the destruction I was causing the most awesome part about all of it was that same week the Athletics PR team had put massive posters of me all over campus

promoting the next game they were everywhere some of the posters took up the entire side of buildings So Lisa and her friends had to see me all over campus every day while this drama was erupting all around them I felt like a triumphant dictator it was glorious and pathetic at the same time Their coach even proceeded to have a serious meeting with a compliance department and my team's coaches my coaches literally laughed at her saying this seems like an internal issue but op hasn't done anything illegal or broken any school policy so there is nothing

we can do this infuriated the women's track coach their team had fallen apart their national ranking began to plummet then Lisa's coach even got in trouble for being caught tearing down some of the Smaller posters of me on campus and raging temper tantrum I loved all of it I continued to add fuel to the fire posting photos of me with girls smiling being happy every chance I could on Facebook and Instagram but under it all I was bitter I was so deep into my new mindset I had already forgotten the kind-hearted naive kid I used

to be I hated my old self because I let some girl emasculate me I was so full of self-pity looking back at it's Depressing no one really knew though because I played the cool guy attitude in front of people there was even a girl on campus on one of the sports teams who claimed that she was pregnant with my kid after I pretended to like her the same way I did with all of the other girls on Lisa's team and soon as we passionately hugged I moved on it's a long story but it turned out

she wasn't pregnant but the news or press that came from that further dug the knife deeper Into Lisa's side I left a trail of women undeceived in relationships I destroyed I feel bad now but at the time I didn't care because they were equally at fault in my eyes since they were cheating on their boyfriends or sleeping with their friend's EX quickly girls became wary of me plus I was running out of potential targets [ __ ] I was an awful human being then the way I was thinking and I was going after girls that

weren't even friends or on The track team with Lisa but were just around her in daily life for example her classmates and as well as her own family I even flirted with her sister who was married with a kid and I almost succeeded she was down but her and Lisa's dad found out about it and stepped in and put a stop at all before we could do anything her sister was ostracized as the new spread within the family I wanted Lisa to know I was everywhere And constantly remind her how she [ __ ] up

in my eyes this was all her fault and she Unleashed this Fury of chaos upon herself she should never have [ __ ] with me like that Lisa had to take an extended medical leave because of her depression and mental health issues she was experiencing from the whole situation she was becoming suicidal she even had to go on medication and lost tons of weight she began to look extremely unhealthy the whole mess was Torturing her and the more she hurt the better I felt at this point I had already inflicted more damage than she did

to me but I had become addicted to the feeling of power I spent zero time processing my own emotions or moving on from what happened all I wanted was more revenge and I couldn't stop after weeks of ignoring Lisa's texts and calls she finally gets a hold of me by showing up to my apartment unannounced late at night she was there to pick up some Stuff she left from when she lived there to take home she was actually a local and her parents lived close by she was still on her medical leave and no longer

staying on campus but rather with her parents I told her I would bring her stuff to her parents house that weekend but I couldn't let her in because I had company which I did but it wasn't one of her teammates or friends unfortunately I then to take all the items I had collected from all the girls over the Weeks there was probably like eight or nine things from different girls including her teammates and through their belongings and along with Lisa's stuff into big black trash bags I took the bags to her house and then called

Lisa's dad I told him I left her stuff on his porch and to inform his demon daughter me and Lisa's dad actually really got along and he even took my side after Lisa and I broke up but after all these events transpired he obviously Had a negative opinion of me 15 minutes after I get off the phone with her Lisa's dad I get a call from Lisa I answer because I want to hear her reaction to having all these other girls [ __ ] mixed in with hers she was sobbing uncontrollably it sounded like that

half crying half mumbling thing people do when they are hysterical she wasn't even angry just desperately begging me to point to stop my tyranny I just smiled and baked in the glory of hearing her Hurt I responded why were there other guys in our relationship you mix them into our relationship like I mixed other girl [ __ ] into your [ __ ] it's perfect little ironic metaphor I thought it sounded cool at the time and was real proud of myself face palm I later found out from one of Lisa's friends who knew she was

cheating on me during our relationship that Lisa was convinced I was the one cheating on her because I was always out of town this doesn't make Sense since I was out of town because of basketball a very legit excuse not just randomly on my own accord you could literally see my schedule on the school's website I kept in contact with her constantly when I was gone but obviously when I had practice her team meetings I couldn't be on my phone but she didn't have the logic in her brain to figure this out I guess I

assume it's just an excuse she made to protect her insecurities about the whole Fiasco or To keep face with people who knew she was cheating months go by Lisa comes back to school from her medical leave and we bump into each other at the physical therapy center in our athlete facility building I see this as yet another opportunity it had been a while since I did something that hurt her and I was still hungry for more Vengeance I proceed to pretend like I want to rekindle things with her she is cautious at first but eventually

bites after About a week we start to mend our relationship we proceed for about a month but I wouldn't call this a relationship I forbid her to have any male friends nor is she allowed to go out and party with her girlfriends I also need full access to all her accounts and her location at all times it was more like a hostage situation it gave me a sense of control meanwhile I'm not being faithful at all this was my plan all along finally she Finds out about me sleeping with a girl in one of her

classes and we have a nasty breakup I told her that she literally knows what it felt like to be me when we last dated yet again I felt triumphant it was just another chance to hurt her and I did after this we don't speak for years I graduate University and move to Central America she messages me while I'm there about a year after I moved and about two years after we last spoke at This point my life has become that of a real degenerate I was doing copious amounts off substance a daily basis and about

75 percent of my life was involved in some sort of illegal or nefarious activities but I still blame her for me becoming the Dark Soul that I was and taking no responsibility for bitter immoral nature I hadn't had another relationship since her and always had trouble because I couldn't trust a women in any capacity anymore even after years Had passed I saw this instance of her messaging me as yet another opportunity to hurt her we begin to talk as friends and even getting flirty with each other over Facebook Messenger mind you there is literally many

countries states and an ocean between us at this point I was planning a trip back to my old University to visit some friends however I told her it was different I explained to her I was moving back to the city for a new job I was just offered we decide To meet up when I get back and see if there is anything worth saving between us I had put on my best acting hat and try to seem like I've put our past behind us however I'm just as vengeful now as I was years ago she's

finishing up her last year at University and I make the trip back to the USA I meet Lisa at a coffee shop when I arrive we spend the entire night together from her point of view it really looks like we had moved past our differences and what Happened we could actually work things out however I'm not moving back obviously like I told her I'm only stay two nights she doesn't know this after hooking up a few times and spending two days together without mentioning anything to her about me leaving I pack my things and get

back on a plane back to Central America I blocked her on all my social media and communication Outlets this time I could only fantasize about what happened to her when I Disappeared after she thought I had moved back and supposedly was ready to give our relationship another try this time however it wasn't as satisfying as my previous plots of Revenge my substance habit and lifestyle only got worse every year three years later I was hospitalized and almost died because of my extended substances I was never sober a full 24 hours after that day that went

through that effing period calendar looking back as much pain as I might Have caused her with my vengeful life my new identity that consumed my old one was so tainted with a dark Spirit at heart I think I honestly did more harm to myself with my actions and led me to down the road where I had no morals anymore though I spent the entirety of this story telling everyone of how I kept getting revenge at my ex for cheating on me as satisfying as it was I wish I would have spent an equal amount of

energy healing myself from the Incident if anyone reading this is experiencing the pain that comes with cheating a good Revenge story can bring you some satisfaction but I hope you don't make the same mistake I did rather spend more time healing yourself from the hurt and moving past it the Revenge won't heal you it will be a separate Journey but could distract you from putting yourself back together luckily I got sober and I'm sober now four plus years I even had another girlfriend of Two years cheat on me before I got sober but this time

I didn't take revenge I spent my time healing I changed and only focused on myself and that was way more satisfying than the Revenge I got on Lisa for cheating on me now I'm married almost two years to a woman who is sober in man do I have a good life I have a dream job and a dream marriage thank you everyone who read this sorry if it wasn't well written I never write like this but I have never told the full Story in detail before and I got a lot out of writing it mostly

what I hope to get from this is to share my experiences doing horrible things but feeling an immense satisfying feel from it where it's almost addictive and morphing from generally a good person to a relatively dark evil one obviously people have dark moments but I feel like my personality in psyche has never been the same since that experience I'm looking forward to any responses to the people willing to Read the [ __ ] edit one hey everyone it's been a little over 100 days since I posted this and I've been pretty much astonished at the

number of people who read this I appreciate all the comments even though it was a real mixed bag of responses it's kind of spread to Facebook and YouTube Etc and it's real interesting how different the sentiment is on each of those platforms one of the most common questions I've been getting is have you apologized or talked to Lisa Since the events in this story the answer is no not yet I am planning on it though she's on a long list of amends I've been making for years it looks like I'll be back in her City

sometime next year and I'll reach out to her then I know a lot of you are telling me not to but I have spoken to my sponsor my therapist and mentors about this and the decision is to apologize for my actions and I agree it needs to be done also a lot of comments where People are completely missing the point of narrative of the story and feel the need to try and be my therapist or something and tell how I should have done this or that almost decade ago which was not the point it's obviously

horrible how I reacted that's not what this was about this was about reflection without bias and as I mentioned in my post I have gotten into dating again since that relationship with Lisa many years ago and most of my girlfriends and Relationships after Lisa were good but with one of them I got cheated again in an even more horrific way and was significantly more traumatizing than this story I wrote with Lisa but I had learned from the experience with Lisa and rather didn't take revenge and just walked away that's when I finally got sober and

it led to the life I have now and I'm considering writing post illustrating that story because I actually end up doing the healthier Thing even though I was hurt even more than with Lisa the thing that totally shocked me and honestly filled my heart with empathy is the sheer number of men who reached out to me on here sharing their own stories of infidelity and substance abuse either asking for advice or just to share their own emotions and stories and I felt connected to people dealing with the things I did back then and it was

so fulfilling to have the opportunity to help these men deal with Their trauma in healthier ways than I originally did but thank you all for your responses as much as they vary but generally I think all arguments made below have an element of Truth here is another update on his life I caught my GF getting double teamed by two guys I tried one alive myself a few months ago I made a post in another thread sharing a story about how I got cheated on by my college GF and The terrible Obsession I acquired thereafter to

get revenge on her this is relevant to the story here however in this story I'm about to share is a story that took place years after Lisa my cheating College xgf I got in another relationship and got cheated on again but this time I didn't get revenge but rather I just walked away my revenge story in the other thread is a story of what not to do after getting cheated on and this will be one of how I learned From my past and try to do the right thing this time even though it was incredibly

difficult the story after I had a horrible incident of infidelity with my GF in college Lisa like I said I went on a long tedious mission to get even with her this was followed by years of just being bitter and jaded towards women after college I went down to Central America where I pretty much spent years just doing and selling drugs never Considering getting into a relationship or allowing myself to get vulnerable with another woman I fully admit that I was an awful degenerate during this time well after a few years of this I found

myself just more depressed than ever these substance swear ain't working anymore I grew tired of having these face values shallow and temporary relationships with women I decided to drop everything I was doing in Central America and come back to the United States I called an old friend and made arrangements to move into his place temporarily until I got back on my feet when I moved back to the USA I decided to quit my gnarly substance habit I had developed preceding my college breakup with Lisa it wasn't easy but I was fully committed to giving happiness

another shot I also decided to give dating another chance I immune to feel pathetic that I was giving up on finding someone special just because some girl in College broke my heart by cheating on me a couple months after moving into my friend's place I'd been on a few good dates with women in the area and started opening back up to the idea of allowing myself to grow close with a woman again one day I met this girl on a dating app we will call her cake Kate was 25 and I was 23 who I

just absolutely fell head over heels for she had that burgundy red hair that wasn't orange but almost more of a fluorescent but natural red she had A three-year-old son who honestly I loved and looked kinda Just Like Me Kate had just gotten out of a terribly abusive marriage and was in a very similar position as me she also just went through a period of grief and a bad substance habit she had just cleaned herself up and was ready to try dating again this worked well for both us because we both completely understood each other's emotional

state and were able to allow One another to proceed slowly and not expect too much out of each other we both had fears of commitment and trust issues and were still a little emotionally fragile due to our past relationships and substance habits besides this we had so many things in common Kate even said she felt like she was dating the male version of herself and she liked it because we allowed each other to be completely authentic as the months rolled on we grew closer and Closer me and her son got along and he even called

me dad he was too young to remember his biological father and I was the only other father role he's ever had in his life the day I taught him how to pee standing up on a tree sealed the deal for me and he was my son from that point on I got a job at a finance firm and Kate worked at a nightclub things were going well and we moved into an apartment together bought a car together and we're In the process of trying to buy a house we were going to get married and have

a kid of our own we only smoked weed occasionally and felt like we had fully recovered from our Pace substance addictions and emotional wreckage we both crawled out of the depths of real darkness and found some peace and happiness together or so I thought me and Kate never had any jealousy or suspicions with each other we fully Trusted each other we never went through each other's phones and we knew each other passwords and login info to everything so we never had any issues around trust with one another until this happened typically I would get up

early in the morning before I got ready for work to walk Kate into the apartment from the parking lot because she wouldn't get home until after 3 or 4 a.m in the morning from work and it was a bit of a Sketchy walk the club typically was only open until 2 am most days but recently started staying open until foremost nights of the week or so Kate told me one morning Kate said she was leaving work a little later because she had to drop a friend off at her house she told me this only like

five minutes before she would ordinarily arrive home it usually took her about 35 minutes to get home from work so I found it a bit odd that she told me so last second and I Knew where her friend lives so it may have only taken an extra five minutes to drop her off on the way to our place she ends up getting home about an hour later than usual and something seemed a bit off she looked high not on wheat but it struck me as if she was on Coke or Molly I briefly confronted her

about this but she brushed it off quickly and said she was late because her friend's car broke down and they tried to get it fixed but couldn't that's why it took so Long to get home this was the first time in almost a year that anything like this happened so I quickly pushed down my suspicions and chalked it up as me being a bit paranoid because of my past experience with infidelity and dishonesty I told myself Kate would never do anything sketchy she had been through the same thing I went through and she knew in

full detail my story about my last relationship she would never do anything like that to me Especially since it happened to her too I wasn't even that suspicious of her cheating or anything I was more suspicious that she was doing hard substances again slowly but surely incidents like this started happening more frequently first like once a month and eventually LED all the way up to happening almost every week there was a few nights where I was almost positive she was high on substances and we thought about it she Finally admitted one day that I thought

she was high that she did half a line of coke once because she was tired and needed a pick-me-up to get through work but that was all she did at this point she was coming home at five six or even 7 A.M some mornings regularly her Club closed at 2 or at 4 AM depending on what day of the week it was she always had excuses like the car wouldn't start she would go to her friend's house after work to smoke weed or she went to a Waffle house with some of her co-workers after their

shifts but then one morning her text messages seemed severely suspicious she wouldn't respond promptly and it really seemed like she was forcing herself to sound genuine when texting me she was doing the I'm going to be home a little late dance with me again but this time it really dragged on she told me she was on her way at 6am two hours after the club closed so at 6 30 I went outside to the parking lot to Walk her in when she arrived it was snowing heavily outside there was a blizzard going through the area

about an hour goes by and I hear nothing from her I text and call her over and over she doesn't answer the phone but I get a message from her saying she's almost home another hour goes by before she finally pulls up into the parking lot the time was 9 30 A.M I had to call out from work because I couldn't leave her son home alone I Usually left for work at 7 30. I'm completely covered head to toe in snow I walk up to the car and I open her door Kate looks at me

like she had seen a ghost and she begins rambling nervously and almost incoherently she said she got pulled over but was let go without a ticket the car ran out of gas so she had to stop to fill up her friend was having a mental breakdown so she stayed with her for a while to help her after work she even started blaming me for things Like saying she wouldn't have gotten pulled over if I got the registration done sooner yada yada yada thinking she could have told me this by texting me or calling me at

any point during all of this it was all very suspicious the whole time she won't shut up giving me very inconsistent stories while we were on our walk into the apartment I can't help but notice how dilated her pupils are and how she is visibly grinding her teeth obviously I was very Angry at this point but I was so exhausted and cold from standing outside for hours and worrying about her I temporarily Let It Go and tried to distract myself with some video games I was convinced she was doing cocaine at work or after work

what else was she up to who was she doing cocaine with just her co-workers and friends is she doing other drugs was she cheating I was only mildly worried that she was cheating I was more concerned about her substances We both had our runs in the past with them hence why we only smoked weed now days and occasionally had a drink we weren't sober or anything like people in a 12-step program but we tried to keep it very mellow her lying about these substances was even more concerning to me than the actual substantios because it

was triggering my Trauma from my ex Lisa who lied to me and cheated on me in college I literally was at the point where I Didn't even care if she did these substances he just wanted her to be honest with me I couldn't stand the thought of being in another relationship where my GF was lying to me about anything my mind began to spiral I felt completely betrayed me and Kate helped build each other back up after our tumultuous pass and now we wonderful lives I never thought she would lie to me about anything we

had such an open book trustworthy relationship and we Never experienced any problems with this type of stuff before I got obsessed with trying to find out if she was lying about the drugs I needed undeniable proof the next day when she left for work I tore up the house looking for something I had no idea what I was looking for a bag of coke some pills maybe I went through every drawer every nook and cranny of every piece of furniture coat pocket on top of the cabinets anywhere she could hide Something I found nothing I

tried to convince myself I was just being paranoid my PTSD and insecurities about my past relationship were triggering me and I was just getting obsessive with trying to find something that wasn't there I decided I would stop trying to find out if she was lying because if I was wrong my behavior could ruin a good relationship I thought Kate would never lie to me or even worse Cheat on me she had a horrible experience with her ex-husband cheating on her while she was pregnant he also hit a substance problem from her so I couldn't imagine

her doing the same thing to me that her ex-husband did to her so I let things go she came home at normal times again for a while this calmed me down a lot I began to feel bad for my paranoia until one night I'm at a local pool hall playing at a table with a random guy we will call him Jerry and While me and Jerry are chatting I mentioned that my girlfriend works at the club's name Jerry's Sister Sarah was hanging out with us while we played pool said she worked at the same Club

a couple of months ago I asked her if she knew Kate and she said she did but they weren't really that close they mostly knew each other in passing I then expressed that I wished Kate had a day job where we could be home together more at night when I got off work I tell Sarah that since the club typically closes at four I would only see Kate for about an hour or two before I left for work in the morning Sarah then looks at me confused and says I thought they closed at 2AM when

I worked there we only closed at four on Friday and Saturday nights I tell Sarah they changed the hours after you left Sarah then tells me that her roommate still works there and she never mentioned the closing times had changed because she Still comes home just after two during the week it got awkward fast but I Shrugged it off and finished the game of pool after the game I went home and I couldn't get what Sarah told me out of my head I looked up the clubkate worked out and indeed it said they were only

open till 4am on Friday and Saturday nights and 2 A.M every other night I again convinced myself that they must have not updated the times on their website yet after they made changes or Something deep down I knew Kate was up to something but I was so scared of being lied to again after years of avoiding relationships for that exact reason I was in full-fledged denial the next day was a Sunday night I texted Kate and asked her when she would be off that night and she said she would be home at 4 30 and

she would text me when she was on her way so at 2 30 a.m I called the club and asked if I could speak with her it was about her son the Manager answered and told me they had closed at two and Kate already left I felt like I was going to throw up I decided I was going to confront Kate I don't know when she came home that night because I ended up drinking until I passed out and didn't go out to the parking lot to walk her in when I woke up she was

asleep next to me I got up and went into the living room where I saw her purse sitting on the coffee table I picked it up and started to go Through it at first I didn't find anything no substances or anything shady else that would throw me off then I noticed tucked away in one of the small zippers I found an empty dime bag and rolled up dollar bill is this what I've been looking for all this time I just put it down on the coffee table and went to work I was hoping she would

see it and know that I found it when I came home she was getting ready for work she was in front of the bathroom mirror Doing her makeup specifically her eyeliner I lean up against the door and look at her through the mirror she looks up and says hey babe what's up how was work I guess she didn't see that I found the rolled up dollar bill I reply with hey we need to talk about something I proceed to tell her that I call the club and they told me they close at two on Sundays

she immediately ignores the entire topic of her lying about what time the Club closes and proceeds to Scream at me for being controlling and obsessive and not trusting her and having no right to call the club in the first place it didn't phase me I had made sure that I wasn't just being paranoid what she was doing was grade A gaslighting which I was well experienced with because of my previous relationship the Fight Continues to escalate I accuse her of doing cocaine behind my back and lying to me about her substance habit I call her

a Coke or and that's when she Turns around and swings at me with her eyeliner I turn in reflex and she lodges the eyeliner pencil about an inch and a half into my shoulder she then proceeds to punch about half a dozen times in the face I don't react or hit her back I was mostly just in shock once she finished beating me and screaming we both just stand there starring at each other I pull the pencil out of my arm and drop it on the floor I walk out of the bathroom and into the

kitchen where I Get some duct tape and patch up the hole in my arm I have a tattoo right where she stabbed me and I still have a nice healthy scar there to this day I leave the apartment and I start my walk to the liquor store Kate is blowing up my phone she is doing the whole thing where she is apologizing and when she doesn't get a response she begins throwing insults and then repeats that cycle over and over I buy a bottle of Fireball whiskey and Proceed to walk and drink and walk and

drink I eventually black out and wake up too none other than the Jeffrey who I played pool with the other day and some other guy I didn't know trying to pick me up out of the snow they put me in their car apparently they were on their way to work and saw me fall and not move on the side of the street and pulled over to make sure I was okay today I wonder where those guys worked because it must have been super early in the Morning I was walking for hours at that point and

probably blacked out long before I fell I had finished the whole bottle of whiskey very quickly when I was in the car with them they asked me what was going on and why I was walking around at that time of night that far from the town I could barely talk it felt like my lips were frozen I was able to tell them where I lived and they dropped me off at home when I go inside Kate is shocked and Tries to get me to lay down and get me warm I blacked out again shortly after

and wake up in a pool of vomit in my bed I get up and take a shower and go out into the living room where Kate is sitting on the couch crying we begin to talk she apologizes for stabbing me with the eyeliner pencil and she admits that she had started doing coke again was going to her co-worker's place a few of them lived together in an apartment they were all females and she would do coke With them before coming home she first started doing it to help her get through work and it just kept

escalating I asked her if it was just Coke or if it was other stuff too because there were some nights where she seemed like she was more than just Coke she admits every once in a while she took a Xanax to take the edge off the coat before she came home but she did this rarely we ended the conversation civilly and she promised to stop doing substances And lying to me about where she was and that she would never hide anything from me again but now that I knew she was capable of lying and keeping

things for me I was a bit more on my toes with things than usual weeks go by and things are kind of back to normal for a while the only odd thing was Kate was working more often than usual she would cover for people more pick up extra shifts randomly more often.before she only worked four days a Week but now she working six or seven days it didn't become suspicious until I noticed that if we had a fight on a night she wasn't scheduled to work she would immediately start getting ready and tell me she

text her manager and asked if she could come in because she needed to get away from me we only had one car and this was before Uber was really everywhere so I couldn't go check out her work to see if she really was at work but then one day my friend was over While Kate was at work and we were just playing video games and decided we wanted to go out to get some Taco Bell neither of us had it in forever we had the munchies and wanted to find one so I pulled out my

phone to look on Google Maps where the nearest Taco Bell was that's when I noticed something I'd never seen before me and Kate shared a Google account on our Androids at the time so it showed both of our search histories for Locations we typed into Google Maps and on that very day she searched some random location in a nearby neighborhood when she left for work my head began to spiral again and I told my friend I no longer felt up to it and just wanted to go to bed so he left a bit confused I

double checked everything on my phone and even went on my computer and did some searches to see if there was any way I was misinterpreting it and I was not when Kate came home I asked her if She really went to work that night she got real defensive and started accusing me of being paranoid I then proceed to show her the Google Maps and how someone searched this location right when she supposedly left for work and it was not me she proceeds to tell me the most epic lie I've ever heard she said I never

went there and searched it Google is wrong it's probably just a glitch all right now I finally admitted to myself I am dating a liar again I grab a few Things and I get a motel in town I spend many nights fighting with Kate over the phone and crying while watching shitty cable TV I was so angry that for the second time in a row I'm dating someone who lies to me and keeps things for me one of our fights gets so heated we completely stopped talking for two days we didn't break up though just

stop talking something inside me was desperately hoping that maybe she's just doing coke and drugs not cheating but I Am super suspicious that she is cheating at this point and I couldn't let go of it after a couple nights in the motel I had convinced myself Kate isn't cheating she was just back into her substance addiction and I need to help her get out of it I know firsthand what substance addiction can do to someone as it did to me once I decide to reconcile with her it was later at night and I knew she

would be back home in a few hours and I would meet her in the parking lot with Some flowers or something I borrowed a friend's car went to the shop and bought some flowers and headed home I park in the parking lot and begin to wait for Kate to get home at around 2 45 a.m I see our car drive up to the parking lot but I see someone in the passenger seat it was Kate she wasn't driving she was sitting in the passenger seat there was a man I didn't know driving my car I

just laid low and watched when this random dude that Didn't know park my car I wasn't ready for what happened next another man also gets out from the back seat WTF is happening who are these people the three of them walk into our apartment I pull out my phone and begin to write a text message to Kate I tried to act like I didn't know anything so that I could see what she would say maybe these were just platonic friends and she had nothing to hide I text her and ask her if she was home

yet from work and if I Could come over and we could talk things out I told her I wanted to apologize for yelling and saying some hurtful things during our fights I don't get any messages back for about 15 minutes and then I get a text from her saying I just got home but I want some alone time I do love you with all my heart let's talk tomorrow my heart was beating out my chest as I read the text I banged my head on the steering wheel in Rage while Simultaneously crying I get out

of my car and decide to go inside and confront her when I get to my apartment the door is locked I forgot my keys because I only brought the keys for friend's car I heard loud music playing on the other side of the door I tried knocking but no one answered I walk around the corner where I knew our living room window and bedroom windows were we were on the ground floor level I peep in through our living room window and I see no one I Was honestly hoping that I would see them there just

smoking weed casually or something but if they weren't in the living room then where the [ __ ] are they I walk a little further down until I get to our bedroom window the blinds were down but I could see and if I put my eyes on the edge of the window to look real close when I leaned in to look around the blinds my heart sank into my stomach on the other side of the blinds in our Bed my beautiful girlfriend whose son I consider to be my own was getting spit roasted by the

two guys I saw her walk in with I leaned up against the wall and slid down until I was sitting on the ground my face fell into my hands I sat there for five minutes vaguely hearing what was going on through the window above me I contemplated going in and killing all three of them I was so filled with rage I decide to get up and get back into the car I start chain Smoking cigarettes as all my memories of the relationship that I cherish so much began to dismantle in my mind everything was a

lie everything I thought about Kate that made me love her so much started to dissolve now a lot of you have read my story about when I was cheated on by my college ex-girlfriend Lisa when Lisa cheated on me my rage led me to do everything I can to get the gnarliest Revenge I could in that story I went completely overboard and Lisa Ended up extremely broken and abused now many years later in my first relationship after Lisa I'm in the same position but worse this time however I decide not to get revenge on Kate

as I did on Lisa no this time I'm going to kill myself but first I'm going to kill Kate I start the car and drive I stop by a gas station that I know sells some basic hunting and fishing equipment 24 hours they don't have any guns but they had Some hunting and skinning knives I buy the largest knife they have and drive back to my motel grab my keys to the apartment and then head home to paint my bedroom walls with their blood when I get there I slowly and quietly open the front door

I begin to creep down the hallway to our bedroom in gripping the knife tight expecting one of the guys to maybe pop out I inch up to my bedroom door it's open but the lights in the room are off and I can't See anything inside it's quiet I don't hear anything sweat is dripping down my face and I'm trying to control my shaking and breathing so no one hears me come in scared of what I might see I reach into the bedroom and flip the light switch on when the lights pop on I just see

Kate lying in the bed naked and by herself was I hallucinating earlier or something or did those guys just leave before I got back she didn't wake up so I take a look around the room I See a condom wrapper on the nightstand next to her bed which pretty much confirmed what I saw and I now knew I wasn't hallucinating me and Kate never used condos when I take my first step into the bedroom I hear the door to her son's room across the hall open I turn around quickly ready to stab one of the

two guys I saw earlier but of course it's just Kate's son my son my first thoughts were what is Kate's Son doing here why didn't Kate take him to daycare or to her mom's house before she had two random dudes come over to [ __ ] her was the little kid there the entire time while she was at work or while she was getting double teamed across the hall what the hell is wrong with her he looks up at me from his bedroom door down to your back and he rushes in to hug my leg

I put my hand on his head look at the knife in my other hand I put The knife in my back pocket and I get on my knee and I tell my stepson I'm going away for a while just wanted to say bye to you and Mom before I left he then proceeds to give me the saddest face I've ever seen I pick him up and take him back to bed tuck him in and tell him goodbye I knew it would be the last time I see him but I didn't want him to know he

was about to never see me again now after that I can't kill his mother he can't grow up without his mother he Doesn't deserve that even if I think she deserves to die however I still wanted to die I walk out of the apartment and start walking down the street just sobbing my eyes out I sit down at a bus stop bench and I pull out the knife and I begin cutting at my wrists I was ready to die for like 10 minutes I cut at them trying to get the blood to flow harder then

a police car pulls up and two cops get out and one of them says hey man what are you doing I Calmly tell him I'm done he radios in more cops and before I know it there is like 15 or 20 of them surrounding me they spend about 20 minutes trying to get me to put the knife down I'm bleeding all over the cop walks closer to me and asks me to hand him the knife I stare at the knife for a few seconds but he hadn't talked me off the ledge nothing at this point

could I also knew I couldn't get out of this situation without being thrown into a psych ward I Raised the knife over my head and lunge at the officer and before I could even take two steps I'm on the ground getting tasered and they're piling on top of me putting handcuffs on me I had made one major miscalculation I thought if I made a move towards the officer they would for sure shoot me dead but I forgot I was white so unfortunately I was only tasered the next thing I know I'm riding in the back

of the cruiser and they take me to the hospital where they sedate me And Patch me up they gave me some sedatives that completely knocked me out the next thing I know I wake up and I'm in what I later find out is a psych ward for the criminally insane it's like jail or prison but worse you don't know what day or time it is and you get no communication with the outside world or at least we didn't at this one I'm not going to go into detail about what I experienced there it was one

of the darkest places I'd ever seen in my life I was in there for about six weeks before an attorney was able to get me off on a technicality when I was released I took a taxi home it was about three hours away when I get home I had the taxi driver drop me off at a McDonald's near my apartment I sit down and charge my phone I didn't want to go back to that apartment not after what I saw there I have Text slash call slash voicemails from many people including Kate I also obviously

was let go from Work my credit cards were all maxed out Kate clearly had been using them because she had a card for all my accounts I called Kate and she was ecstatic to hear from me she had been so worried and had no idea what happened to me I told her I would explain everything but I needed her to meet me at the McDonald's and not to bring her son with her she was confused at first but agreed she would meet me after she dropped her son off at daycare Kate later walks into the

McDonald's and rushes to try and hug and kiss me but I brush her off and tell her to sit down this threw her off a bit but she sits down and I tell her what happened everything I saw before I was thrown into the ward what she responded with shocked Me Kate had the audacity to try and deny everything she said I must have looked into the wrong apartment and saw someone else I shook my head in disbelief and I cut her off mid-sentence I told her she needs to tell me the truth right now

and if she tries to lie to me again I will get up and walk out of this McDonald's and she and her son will never see me again I look at her sternly in the eyes and she could see I meant every word I said I asked her one more time have you been cheating on me she looks down at her lap and begins to cry she mutters yay I have she proceeds to admit that her substance Problem had gone from Coke to meth and she was also doubling down with Xanax every night that's why

the guy was driving our car because she was too intoxicated to drive I stare at her for about a minute and before I let out a big sigh I pull my phone out of the charger and stand up she looks up and asks where are you going I look her dead in the eyes and say I'm going to go do drugs it's all I can think to do right now as I pick up my backpack she asks me If we are still together I tell her no I didn't mean I was going to stay if

you told me the truth I was going to leave either way I just wanted to hear you admit it before I left the events after for the next few months I pretty much lived on the road basically homeless I would hop from town to town mostly selling substance at strip clubs and crashing where I could sometimes I slept in motels sometimes I slept outside I was doing a lot of my Own product I lost almost 65 pounds in these few months because sometimes I would go days without eating or sleeping one day I wake up

in a hospital I had been having seizures and my internal organs had begun failing I was severely malnourished IM six feet five inches and I was weighing in at 155 pounds soaking wet after a big meal multiple doctors and therapists came in to see me every day trying to figure out what was going on with me I spent about a month in the Hospital recovering before I was discharged the doctors recommended I seek a sobriety program they concluded that I had no mental disorders other than PTSD and mostly just had a poly substance addiction problem

when I was discharged from the hospital I stayed at a halfway house shelter for almost four months I found a sober program and began going to meetings and never touched the substance again since I was released from the hospital I got a New phone and number almost no one from my life prior to my stay in the hospital had any contact with me anymore while I was in the halfway house I started working out to try and regain some size I looked like a bean pole when I was released from the halfway house I got

a job at a nearby gym as a personal trainer a brand new career path for me but the gym had become my new safe space where I felt okay fast forward five years to today I am Still sober to this day IM weighing in at a healthy and lean 265 pounds I am happily married for two years I run my own lucrative business the day I left the hospital I thought long and hard about what I was going to do with my life my instinct was to retreat Into Darkness I still wanted to get back

at Kate for what she did just like I did with Lisa in college after a few long periods of thought over the course of a few weeks I decided the best revenge Would be to live the best life I could and most importantly I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself for the things I went through this changed the game for me I stopped blaming others or the world for the things that happened to me looking back at this today five years later and where my life has led me I am so happy I made

the decision to try a different course of action I don't even recognize myself anymore when I wrote these stories about Lisa and Kata don't Even see me I see some other messed up kid I turned 30 this weekend I got sober a month before my birthday five years ago if you would have told me back then that I would be where I am now I would never believe you I am so happy I didn't take my own life or even worse take Kate's life that day I am so glad I decided to get up and

keep trying at life I had to fall a few times but when I finally got up I flew I spoke with Kate only once years after I left the McDonald's the day she admitted to cheating on me and after speaking with her I gotta say it's true what they say the best revenge is living a good life this video was extremely long if you enjoyed the video and want longer videos like these in the future comment Google