English Leap Podcast >> from Speak English with Claus. [music] >> Hey English learners, welcome back to the English Leap Podcast, your cozy place to learn easy English through real life conversations. I'm Anna >> and I'm Jake.
Yeah, we're really happy you're here with us today. You might be listening on your way to work, sitting in your favorite corner at home, or lying in bed with your earphones in just trying to escape your own thoughts for a while. >> [laughter] >> Oh yes, those thoughts.
You know, before we started recording, my mind was already talking. One voice said, "Don't forget your lines. " Another voice said, "You look tired today.
" And another one said, "What if you say something stupid? " [laughter] >> Yeah, I get that, too. Sometimes I feel like my brain is a group chat I never left.
One message is calm, one is dramatic, one is just sending panic emojis for no reason. If you feel something similar, if you have a loud mind, if you often talk to yourself in a hard way, hey, you're not strange. You're human and you're in the right place today.
>> Today, we want to talk about that inner voice, the way you speak to yourself in your head. Because that voice can do two things. It can make you feel small or it can quietly help you grow.
>> Yeah, because I know that voice. It made me say no to chances, stay quiet when I wanted to speak, and believe I was not that kind of person for many years until someone explained it to me clearly. That talk was a real turning point for the Anna you hear today.
>> I feel that and I think many people listening are maybe in that before stage right now, the part before the turning point. the voice is still strong and they don't even know where it comes from. >> And I realized something.
If you don't understand how that inner voice attacks you, you can't really answer back. It's like playing a game when you don't know the rules. Of course, you feel like you're always losing.
>> So, in this episode, we want to do something simple but powerful. We'll slow down that inner voice, look at the things it usually says, and then show you how to gently talk back in a different way. Not fake positive, not I am perfect, just kinder, more helpful, more honest words.
>> And we'll talk about it in B1 level English. Calm, simple sentences. No heavy psychology words, just things you can feel and use in your own life.
If you don't understand every single word, that's okay. Really, just relax, listen, and let the ideas sit in your mind. You can always listen again later.
>> And near the end, we'll do a small word tour. We'll take a few useful words from today and explain them slowly with examples so they stay with you. If you enjoy learning English like this, calm, real, a little bit personal, don't forget to like this episode and subscribe to the English Leap podcast.
It really helps more learners find us. >> And later, we'd love to hear from you in the comments. What is one sentence you often say to yourself inside your head?
It can be a kind sentence or even a difficult one you want to change. >> All right, let's jump in. Okay, I want you to imagine something simple.
Your mind is like a noisy group chat. And inside that chat, there's a bully, a coach, a grandma, and a drama queen, all sending messages at the same time. [laughter] >> Yeah, that already feels a little too real.
My brain is exactly like a group chat at 2:00 a. m. No filter, 200 messages, and half of them are drama.
So this is our starting point today. Not you are broken, not you are lazy, but your inner group chat is just very loud and some of the voices are not very kind. And step by step, we're going to look at those voices, especially the bully and the coach, and see how you can slowly turn the volume down on one and up on the other.
>> In that group chat, you have different voices. One voice says, "Come on, you can do it. " That's like your inner coach.
Another voice says, "You always fail. Don't even try. " That's your inner bully.
>> And then there's the voice that worries about everything. Be careful. Don't speak.
Don't make a mistake. It thinks it's protecting you, but it often makes you feel overwhelmed, like your head is full and you can't move. When this negative voice is very strong, we call that your negative mindset.
The usual way you think about yourself. Maybe your mindset is I'm always late or my English will never be good or other people are better than me. >> And when you keep thinking like that, your feelings can start to spiral.
One small problem becomes 10 big problems in your head. >> For example, you make one small mistake in English. The inner bully says, "Wow, that was stupid.
" Then it says, "You always do this. " Then people will laugh at you. And suddenly a small moment becomes a storm.
>> Maybe you know this. Someone corrects one word and inside you boom. Your body wants to shut down.
You don't want to speak anymore. You want to disappear from the room. >> And then what happens?
You hold back. You don't raise your hand. You don't join the conversation.
You don't show your opinion. On the outside, you look quiet. But on the inside, you are busy beating yourself up for every tiny mistake.
>> Yeah. And that is really tiring. At the end of the day, it's not just English.
This voice starts talking about your whole life. You're lazy. You're behind.
You'll never change. >> If you're listening and thinking, "This is me. " Please don't feel ashamed.
There's nothing wrong with you. Your mind is just using an old pattern. It learned to talk to you in this hard way for many years.
>> The beautiful thing is patterns can change. Your mindset is not a prison. It's more like an app you can slowly update.
Not in one day, of course, but step by step. >> So, in this episode, we don't want to delete your thoughts. That's impossible.
We want to understand this group chat and then slowly give more power to one voice. The inner coach. >> Yeah.
The coach who still tells the truth but in a kinder way. The coach who helps you build up confidence instead of breaking it down. >> In the next part, let's listen more closely to the bully voice.
How does it talk in real life in English class, at work, when you're alone at night? Because when we can see clearly how the bully talks, we can finally answer back, not with hate, but with something stronger. >> Yeah.
And to do that, we have to really listen to how that voice sounds in real life. Not in a movie, but in your normal boring day, >> right? So, let's slow down three simple moments in class, on your phone, and in bed at night.
The bully is very active in those places. First, imagine you're in an English class or meeting. The teacher or boss asks a question.
Inside your head, the answer comes. I think it's present perfect. >> And for one second, you feel brave.
Your mouth starts to open. >> And then the bully jumps in. Wait, what if you say it wrong?
What if they think you're stupid? Just stay quiet. >> So, you close your mouth.
You look shy, but really you just lost a small fight with that inner bully. >> Then second moment, your phone. You want to send a message in English, maybe to a teacher, a manager, or someone you like.
You type something. >> And the voice says, "Who do you think you are? Your English is so bad.
They won't care. " >> So you erase the message. Maybe you even erase a voice note three times.
And then later that night, the same voice says, "Why don't you take more action? Why are you so quiet? " It's like, "Excuse me, sir.
You told me not to do anything. " [laughter] >> Yeah, it's very confusing. >> And the third place the bully loves is bedtime.
You lie in the dark, phone in your hand. >> You scroll and your brain starts a highlight movie of your mistakes. Why did you say that today?
Why didn't you speak up in that meeting? Why are you still here in life? >> This is how we get into a spiral.
One scary thought leads to another and another until you feel like you're carrying the whole world in your mind. >> Like you're carrying the world on your shoulders. You feel heavy even if you didn't do much that day.
>> At the end of the day, it's not your English level that makes you tired. It's this quiet fight inside your head. >> And hey, if that is you, we're not judging you.
We've both been there, too. Really? >> So, if the bully is driving the car right now, how do we invite someone else to sit in the driver's seat?
>> That's where the inner coach comes in. Let's talk about that voice next. >> Yeah, because just saying stop thinking negative never works.
We need a new way to talk to ourselves. >> Think of it like this. You can't just throw the bully out of the group chat, but you can add a new member, a calm, wise coach.
The inner bully says, "You failed this test. You're stupid. " The inner coach says, "You failed this test.
Ouch, that hurts. Let's see why it happened and what we can change. " >> After my studies, I had to teach my first big English class.
I was so nervous. I felt my voice shaking. I forgot some words.
One student even corrected my pronunciation. >> Oh, that can feel terrible. >> Yeah.
When I went home, my bully voice said, "See, you're a bad teacher. You will never be good enough. Maybe you should stop.
" >> And that kind of mindset doesn't just hurt. It also kills your progress. If you believe that story, you won't try again.
>> But then a few days later, I wrote down what actually happened. And I asked myself, if I was my own student, what would I say? That was my inner coach speaking for the first time.
And what did the coach say? >> It said, "Okay, your lesson was not perfect, but you showed up. You stood in front of the class.
That is brave. Next time you can prepare more examples, breathe more slowly, and maybe laugh when you make a mistake. " >> Ah, that already feels lighter.
>> That moment was a small light bulb moment for me. I realized I don't have to wait until I'm perfect to be kind to myself. I can be kind while I grow.
You can practice this too. Next time you make a mistake in English, try this small change. Don't say I am stupid.
Say I feel stupid right now, but this is just one moment. What can I learn? >> That one sentence slowly changes your mindset.
It gives you a little more clarity. You're not attacking who you are. You're just looking at what happened.
>> Now, there is another big idea here. Your brain is always learning what to show you. like a social media app.
>> Yeah. Let's talk about your mind's algorithm. >> If you've ever opened YouTube and suddenly it's all cooking videos, you know what an algorithm does, >> right?
If you watch a lot of cooking, the app says, "Oh, you like this. I'll show you more. " If you watch sad news all day, it shows you more sad news.
>> Your mind works in a very similar way. The thoughts you repeat are like videos you like and watch again. If you think all day, I'm lazy.
I'm behind. I'll never change. Your brain starts to collect proof.
Look, you didn't finish that task. Look, your friend is more successful. Look, you made another mistake.
>> So, the algorithm in your head learns, oh, this is important for you. Let me show you more of it. >> But if you start noticing small wins, I listened to English for 10 minutes today.
I sent an email I was scared to send. I stepped a little bit out of my comfort zone. Then your mind begins to see a new story.
Hey, maybe I'm not stuck. I am changing. >> When you step out of your comfort zone even a little, you give new data to your brain.
You show it a different possible you. >> And you don't have to pretend everything is perfect. You just choose which moments you want to highlight in your day.
>> So if we want to change how we feel, we don't need magic. We need simple, repeatable actions that send a new message into the algorithm. >> Let's give you three very small daily habits that can help you do this in the morning, during hard moments, and at night.
>> Nothing crazy, just things you can really use even on a tired day. >> Let's start with the morning because that's when the group chat in your head wakes up, too. >> Yeah.
Many of us start our day by opening our phone. So we start by reading other people's lives, other people's problems, other people's opinions. >> And then we wonder why we feel tired before breakfast.
>> Yeah. So try this. Before you touch your phone, say or write one sentence to yourself.
For example, today I will talk to myself like a friend. Today I will make one small progress in my English. It takes maybe 10 seconds, but it tells your brain, "I am the driver of my day.
" You're not just carrying the world on your shoulders from the first minute. >> Next habit is for those hot moments when you feel angry, hurt, or ashamed very fast. >> For example, someone laughs when you make a mistake, or you see a photo online that makes you feel less than, or you get a message that wakes up all your doubts.
In that moment, do nothing just for a few seconds. Don't text. Don't post.
Don't explode. >> Take a breath and ask, "What is my inner bully saying right now? " Maybe it's, "You're a failure.
Nobody respects you. " >> Then gently ask, "What would my inner coach say? " Maybe, "This hurts, but it doesn't decide my future.
I can answer later when I feel calmer. You don't have to control the first thought, but you can choose the second thought. That choice is where you begin to bounce back.
>> It's like a song on the radio. You can't always control which song plays first, but you can decide whether you leave it on or change the station. >> And now the last habit for the end of your day.
>> Many people go to bed and only replay their mistakes. I should have done this. I shouldn't have said that.
I wasted the day. >> That's like giving your brain a negative report every night. No wonder you wake up tired.
>> Tonight, try this instead. Before you sleep, write three things you did right. They can be very small.
I listened to this podcast. I wrote one comment in English. I walked for 5 minutes.
>> See, this trains your mind's algorithm to see progress, not only problems. You're telling your brain, hey, I am moving forward. >> When you do this again and again, your confidence doesn't jump in one day.
It slowly builds up, >> right? You begin to see yourself as someone who maybe feels scared but still shows up. >> Yes, you're not trying to become a perfect robot with no bad thoughts.
You're learning to be a human with a kinder inner voice. So that's it for today's main conversation. We hope something we said today sits in your mind and maybe changes the way you talk to yourself, even just a little bit.
>> Yeah. And remember, you don't have to fix everything in one day. Just noticing your inner voice is already a big step.
>> And before we say goodbye, let's take a slow walk through some of the words and phrases we used today. >> Yeah, just relax and listen. You don't have to remember everything at once.
>> So the first word is mindset. >> Mindset means your usual way of thinking about yourself and about life. It's like the settings of your mind.
>> For example, her mindset used to be very negative, but now she's learning to be kinder to herself. >> Or if you change your mindset about mistakes, you can enjoy learning more. Next word, overwhelm.
>> Overwhelm is the heavy feeling when there's too much to think or to do. Your brain feels full and you don't know where to start. >> For example, I feel overwhelm when I have many messages, many tasks, and no plan.
>> Or learning English should not give you overwhelm every day. >> Another word we used progress. Progress means small steps forward, not perfection.
It's about moving, even if the steps are tiny. >> For example, listening to one English podcast a day is still progress. >> Or don't wait to be perfect.
Celebrate your progress. >> Let's look at clarity. >> Clarity is when your mind feels clear and you understand what to do.
The opposite is confusion. For example, writing my thoughts in a notebook gives me more clarity. >> Or after we talked, I had clarity about my next step.
>> Another word is spiral. >> A spiral is when something goes round and round and usually gets worse. A thought spiral is when one bad thought becomes many bad thoughts.
For example, I made one mistake and then my mind went into a spiral of negative ideas. >> Or when you notice a spiral starting, it helps to take a breath and pause. >> Now, an expression, beat yourself up.
>> To beat yourself up means to be very hard or very unkind to yourself because of a mistake. >> For example, she beats herself up for every small error in English. or you don't have to beat yourself up, you can just learn from it.
>> Next phrase, light bulb moment. >> A light bulb moment is a sudden moment when you understand something clearly. It feels like a light turns on in your mind.
>> For example, I had a light bulb moment when I realized my inner voice was the real problem. >> Or sometimes one sentence in a book can give you a light bulb moment. Now we also said at the end of the day.
>> At the end of the day means when you think about what is really important after everything. >> For example, at the end of the day, your mental health matters more than being perfect. >> Or at the end of the day, how you talk to yourself is more important than one test.
>> Another useful expression, step out of your comfort zone. To step out of your comfort zone means to do something new or a bit scary, not dangerous, but different from your normal safe area. >> For example, speaking to a stranger in English is stepping out of your comfort zone.
>> Or you don't grow if you never step out of your comfort zone. >> Let's look at carry the world on your shoulders. If you carry the world on your shoulders, you feel like you have too many problems or too much responsibility.
Everything feels heavy. >> For example, he feels like he is carrying the world on his shoulders at work. >> Or you don't have to carry the world on your shoulders alone.
>> Another phrasal verb, shut down. To shut down means to stop talking or reacting because you feel stressed, scared, or hurt. >> For example, when they laughed at his mistake, he shut down and stayed silent.
>> Or if your teacher is too strict, some students just shut down and stopped trying. >> Another one, build up. >> To build up means to grow slowly over time, little by little, not all at once.
For example, small daily English habits build up your confidence. >> Or if you keep promises to yourself, you build up self-rust. >> Another phrasal verb, hold back.
>> To hold back means to stop yourself from doing something, often because of fear or doubt. >> For example, her fear of making mistakes holds her back from speaking in class. or don't let your old story hold you back from trying again.
>> Let's talk about show up. >> To show up means to be present and try even if you're not perfect and even if you were scared. >> For example, you showed up today and listened to this whole episode.
That's a big step. >> Or you don't have to be the best. You just have to show up and practice.
>> And our last phrase is bounce back. To bounce back means to recover after something bad and become strong again. >> For example, after a bad exam, she took one day to rest and then bounced back.
>> Or a kinder inner voice helps you bounce back faster after a hard day. >> If you like, you can choose two or three of these words and write your own sentences in the comments. Yeah, that's a great way to build up your vocabulary and also show up for your English practice.
>> And remember, you don't need to use all of them today. Just keep them in your mind and slowly they will become part of your language. >> We're really happy you spent this time with us.
>> Take care of your English and take care of your inner voice. This is Anna >> and this is Jake >> and you've been listening to the English Leap podcast. Bye.
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