time to pull up a chair we've got another great story for you today in the AR Lounge should you let your family's hurtful comments slide for the sake of tradition or do you cut ties for the sake of the woman you love today in the AR Lounge no one's getting away with it brother called my fiance a [ __ ] and parents laughed I publicly exposed and banned them for my wedding I 31 male have been dating my girl Tracy 32 female for over 3 years and now ready to exchange our vows in a month
everything was going on smooth until a few days back I overheard my brother cursing my fiance and you know the worst part my parents giggled as if it was some kind of funny I was always aware that my parents didn't think so highly of Tracy but never realized that the hatred was so deep things have been complicated with them ever since I introduced her to the family my parents especially my mom had always been traditional and uptight they have a right idea of what a perfect daughter-in-law should be quiet modest and always eager to please
Tracy on the other hand is bold passionate and independent she didn't fit their mold and they weren't pleased about it my parents outdated belief is one thing but my brother joining them in this is so hypocritic he's 35 but has no real job in zero long-term relationships who would want to be with a chauvinist he spends his evenings picking women at the bar and he talks about decency what a jerk I wish I had broken his bone that day I'm fuming whenever I remember these words and by the way he smirked and everyone laughed anyway
so Tracy Works in marketing and as a passion she pursues belly dance she's associated with a dance school that conducts summer workshops for high school students and young women in fact that's how we met I'm an event manager and back then I was organizing these workshops for her dance school we hit it off at one of the events and since then there's been no looking back behind The Confident bold girl there's a kind and humble woman the first time I took her to meet my parents it was polite but there was discomfort my mom made
passive aggressive comments about Tracy's outfits like don't you get cold in that or I wish I had the confidence to dress like that Tracy is the first girl I introduced to my family so I don't know if their judgment is particular to her or in general they are hypocrites I talked it up to them needing time to adjust but over the months it became clear they weren't trying to get to know Tracy they were judging her Ryan my older brother wasn't any better he had this smug condescending attitude that graded on my nerves he asked
the most stupid question one could ever think of he goes so do you ever perform at bars must be a hit with the drunks it was offensive but Tracy brushed it off as ignorance she said she's used to such insensitive comments because people look at this dance form differently it was graceful of her to be understanding but I couldn't let this slide since then I distanced myself from my family apart from occasional texts I'm mostly no contact with them I wasn't aware of the fact that people are so judgmental towards a dance she told me
she got ghosted by men as soon as they got to know about her passion she even got rejected in her marketing interviews which has no relation to her dancing last year when I proposed to Tracy I put up a story and my parents reached out congratulating me and wanting to be a part of the wedding mom didn't look pleased she had this look of she of all the girls but Dad assured me that eventually she would come along and she did she stopped commenting on her clothes and her lifestyle I thought finally my mom is
progressing boy was I wrong she was only putting up an act they used to invite us for lunch and dinner now and then but we try to remain distant Tracy and I somehow didn't get a good vibe despite all her effort and now I know the reason why Sunday was my uncle's 65th birthday and his wife and children threw a big bash I was closest to him growing up he and his wife were my god parents and they've always lived up to that role I couldn't miss it he loved me and Tracy more than my
parents did it was supposed to be a joyous occasion he and Aunt are genuinely interested to know about our life updates they're always marveling at her talent and dedication some of the cousins also got excited and curious to see Tracy's dance moves she pulled out the video and showed it to them Aunt then requested Tracy to perform some of the steps she was initially reluctant but then I encouraged her and she agreed with her usual Grace if everyone's okay with it I'd love to it was a brief but St stunning performance Tracy moved with such
elegance and passion that even the most stoic family members clapped enthusiastically then as I stepped away to grab a drink I heard Ryan snickered under his breath with a smirk what a [ __ ] I froze the the words were like a slap to my face before I could react I heard my mom laugh my dad chuckled too as if it were some hilarious inside joke I was standing right past them behind the fridge maybe the frid's door was open and that's why they didn't notice me I don't know I immediately intervened saying what's wrong
with you guys what was that they flustered like they were caught in the act mom was quick to respond saying what happened she behaved as if I was asking something unreasonable I said I heard everything Ryan and Dad froze but mom continued to fight and prove me wrong she was like what did you hear we didn't say anything their denial made me furious and I yelled I heard every freaking word so stop pretending and take accountability dad jumped in to say I shouldn't ruin Uncle Fred's birthday and that whatever misunderstanding we had we can clear
it off later I realized it was not a good idea to address the situation right there it would have embarrassed Tracy in front of everyone and plus I didn't want to ruin things for my godparents so I just walked out from there in discussed I remained silent for the rest of the evening I even pushed off early citing a headache Ryan and my parents behaved as if nothing happened after leaving the party Tracy asked if everything was fine because it was just after her performance that my attitude changed she was worried if it had something
to do with her dance I assured her she wasn't the reason that night I lay awake replaying the scene in my head how could they be so cruel and worse how could they laugh at something so vile the next morning I drove to my parents house I wasn't sure what I was going to say but I knew I couldn't let this slide I just stormed into the house saying why did you laugh at Ryan's comment last night my mom acted startled what are you talking about I snapped at her don't play dumb he called Tracy
a [ __ ] and you laughed why she took a deep breath rolled her eyes and sat on the couch passing looks to Dad Dad sighed and was annoyed at my digging and then said okay it was a joke didn't mean to hurt anyone don't be so sensitive I lost it like completely screaming a joke calling my fiance a [ __ ] is a joke to you the next few minutes was me just ranting at them for their disrespect and disgusting behavior and they occasionally switching between remaining silent making faces and trying to calm me
down then finally mom spoke up rolling her eyes look she's always wearing those revealing outfits flaunting herself what did you expect people to think why does she always have to show her waist or back or you know the front I was stunned I agree Tracy likes to wear deep necks and all but that's her choice it doesn't mean she deserves less respect I was staring at my mom in belief when she said oh come on she's not even that pretty really is that what you think about my future wife that she's ugly and attention seeks
I felt disgusted at her casual insult and said if this is how you feel about Tracy then maybe you don't deserve to be part of our life I raced out of the house and my dad screams at me asking what do you mean are you saying cutting us off I said yes I'm cutting them off and don't bother attending my wedding save yourself from seeing us mom asked me to come back and have a mature talk but I was done talking to them I said I don't want to have anything to do with them that
night mom sent me a long text that I was making a blunder by cutting off my family for my fiance she indirectly pointed out that half of marriages these days end in divorce hence losing a permanent family they for a temporary one Tracy is not worth it these words felt like ass salt rub she's doubling down on uncertainty but does this mean I should let them insult my fiance and put up with their nonsense that's also wrong right your mom's comments of about trac's appearance and the way she's choosing to express herself are unfair and
rooted in outdated narrow thinking you don't have to let them continue treating her or you this way especially when you've made it clear how much she means to you op update one you guys are right as her partner I should protect her irrespective of what happens in the future and that's what I did the challenge was I officially wanted to cut off my family I'd go tell Tracy what was happening and I didn't want to hurt her in this period when she was the happiest preparing for the wedding how could I let her know that
the people who were supposed to welcome her into the family thought so little of her I was still contemplating how to go about it when my brother decided to add more drama to this he randomly showed up at the gym and said he wanted to talk I didn't want to but I had to step aside and listen he tried to defend himself that it was not meant to insult her or hurt her it was just a joke said in a lighter way and maybe it came off in a wrong way and I was taking it
too seriously I said calling your family member a [ __ ] can never be justified not in the world I live so he better take accountability for his words or just back off he said I was blowing it out of proportion it was a very silly stuff I said I'm not here listening to your stupid Theory you think it's fine to demean a woman because of her clothes or her hobby or profession then I vote to cut off such chauvinists for my life that's it I refused to further indulge in any conversation when I got
home I was raging with anger Tracy immediately sensed something was wrong this time I didn't mean to hide it I told her what was happening since Uncle Fred's birthday a censored version I left out the cruelest parts but even the watered down version was enough to bring tears to her eyes she was a gast and speechless she broke down saying why do they hate her so much I hugged her and tried to calm her down saying they didn't hate her but even as I said it I knew it wasn't true we both knew my family
hated her I told her I had to cut off all contact from my parents and Ryan she was sobbing for a long time and was upset I asked her if I could do anything to make her feel better but she nodded nothing then I officially Uninvited my parents and Ryan sent them an email with the reason over the next few days endless drama unfolded Ryan texted me saying dude now you're overreacting mom sent me a long message about how I was being manipulated by Tracy and letting her tear the family apart then Dad called me
saying he can't let the family be divided and we had to work together to find a middle ground apparently he was worried about saving his face in front of his family and friends it's a big thing for my parents to be Uninvited to their son's wedding he tried to negotiate asking if Ryan apologizes can we just move past this I said no amount of apology is going to have them back in my life because I know he's not genuinely sorry an apology without remorse means nothing does it despite my answer he persisted that I should
accept his apology and end the matter I got so annoyed by his nagging that I said if you really want us to forgive then why only Ryan all three of you should apologize to her you guys were also part of the insult because you laughed at the remark and enjoyed it you also owe her an apology he lost his temper and called me a s and said you're going to pay a heavy price for being her puppy she's brainwashing you and you're letting her control you that was the final straw I said maybe she is
or maybe she's not but I don't care all I know is Ryan insulted her and you both supported him and I cannot let this slide it was quiet for a while then yesterday Ryan sent Tracy a text sorry for crossing the line that was it is this the kind of apology you seek when you're remorseful it was a mere formality my parents were nuts after saying that now what Ryan has apologized be a bigger person and move on they wanted me to forget everything as if nothing happened and pretend to be a part of a
happy family I said sorry I'm not into this BS and my decision remains unchanged they made my life miserable with endless texts and calls wanting to be a part of the wedding it's dang so frustrating seeing this mess Tracy came to me and said if you want to invite your parents to the wedding you can they can attend as a guest or maybe we can put them in the last row or something I would have agreed to her plan if I didn't know my parents they wouldn't just attend the wedding and remain in the place
they're allotted no they'll overstep and meddle in everything possible and throw weight and this would infuriate me and I don't want to have a foul mood on my wedding day her willingness to compromise only made me more Resolute and I've told her I've made up my mind and I'm not going to have them back in my wedding or in my life I hope the drama ends here the wedding is in 2 weeks I'm looking forward to enjoying this phase and having the best of it I hope our wedding day turns out to be the best
day of our life I only wish so it sounds like your brother's a ology or just an attempt to sweep everything under the rug and avoid accountability not only that but your parents insistance on brushing everything under the rug for the sake of their own Pride shows how much more they're concerned with Saving Face than actually addressing their wrongdoings you're right to trust your gut here your parents wouldn't just be guests at your wedding they'd make it about them and that's the last thing you need on your special day update two I'm married and our
special day turned out to be way more beautiful than I thought it was everything we dreamed of Tracy was radiant her happiness infectious and can't get enough of her can I of course Ryan didn't care about being cut off from the wedding but my parents weren't thrilled they went to every nook and corner to badmouth us and label Tracy as manipulative and attention seeker according to them Tracy didn't want them in the wedding hence she brainwashed me against them as if I'm some six-year-old toddler I was kind of expecting this from my parents but when
Ryan joined their rally painting himself as the victim and saying I had destroyed the family over that woman I lost my crap I was like everyone deserves to know the complete truth so I went to Facebook and wrot a a detailed post about what had happened in the last 1 month Ryan's derogatory comment my parents defending him and their hypocrisy and toxicity I made two separate posts One open and another in the family group The Post in the closed group contained more details similar to this one I even tagged Ryan on the open post for
his friends and acquaintances to see what a whole lot of crap he is the post went viral within our extended family who doesn't like family drama everyone right my parents blew my phone asking me to delete the post ASAP I said why are you guys scared let everyone know both sides of the story and then decide whose party they want to join dad screamed at me for tarnishing their reputation and said it wasn't an open battle or some sort of competition that I was putting up the details in public I said they started this game
of campaigning against me I'm just completing their one-sided story if they're so worried about their reputation they shouldn't have opened their dirty laundry in public obviously they didn't own up to it instead they went about urging everyone to boycott my wedding people are not dumb after reading my post it became clear to everyone why I did what I did I think posting it publicly was by far the best decision I'd taken it saved me from answering a lot of questions at my wedding I had to talk to Tracy's parents separately and make them understand about
my family's absence but apart from them others like my extended family and relatives didn't bother me with the same questions in fact the tables turned and they came Laing me for my stand my parents tried to involve my godparents in this they tried to manipulate them into not showing up for my wedding but Uncle Fred gave them the hearings of their life and since then my parents have turned turned their backs on them the funny part is now my parents are saying that my godparents and Tracy have ganged up against them and manipulated me to
cut them off I could only laugh at these speculations during the wedding lunch Uncle friend raised a toast to me saying I'm so proud of you for showing your backbone and standing up for your a girl it takes a lot of Courage it made me tear up his words meant everything to me even Tracy's parents thanked me for taking a stand and protecting her dignity they said you've already proved to be a wonderful husband and protected our daughter see I told you it was the best day of my life it's been a week since the
wedding and I found peace in my decision Tracy and I are feeling blessed surrounded by people who genuinely love and support us as for my family they remain bitter family isn't about blood it's about love respect and standing up for the people who matter most and Tracy's worth every ounce of it update three I thought this was over looks like it's not my Facebook post caused more damage than I intended it cost riner's reputation with his friends and also at work I wasn't aware of this until recently when Ryan came to my door drunk screaming
and calling me names for screwing his life after that post his friend started distancing from him who wants to hang out with a chauvinist I wonder how they never saw this side of him maybe Ryan is too good at pretending in front of them then gradually his colleagues started giving cold shoulders at work especially females initially he didn't understand why but then he suddenly became the subject of the inside jokes he claimed he was so badly humiliated and bullied that he ultimately had to quit the place I don't know if it was that extreme or
if he was making it up to gain sympathy and some extra bucks from parents when I was posting that stuff my intention was only to lay out the truth I remember he didn't untag himself for days he threw an attitude for not giving an F he thought no one would believe it oh yes and he even commented woman showing off her belly button all the time is taking offense huh he later deleted that comment after getting a backlash so basically he dug his own grave I said you deserve every bit of disgrace you're getting it
should have been more after that I got to know from cousins that my parents are slipping this information in between the conversation about cutting me off from their will well jokes on them if they think I would crawl back to them on hearing this I hardly care about this I already know they're busy funding Ryan's life because he hardly even has a stable job so after their retirement and everything they would barely have anything left to spare to me instead of accepting their mistakes they're playing mind games to have me back in their life little
do they know I have moved on from them long ago I don't want to f just for the sake of it it's refreshing that you're not allowing their guilt trips like trying to manipulate you with their will to pull you back into their orbit op they want you to feel like you need them but you've already realized that a real family is about respect love and Trust you've made your choice and it's a powerful one Tracy's worth it and so are you have you ever experienced a similar situation share it with us in the comments
below and thank you for joining us today in the r Lounge be sure to like And subscribe subscribe and hit the notification Bell so you don't miss out on our next video until next time and please put your chair back where you found it
