[Music] I'm here today to talk about fundraising or as you probably think of it the other F word because if you want to change the world you have to know how to pay for it I'm not talking about being a good person you can do that for free I'm talking about if you want to create something start something galvanize a community improve the lives of others run for office every day great ideas die on the vine because they don't have capital to get off the ground and all of the work the thought the vision that
goes into the idea isn't worth much if you can't pay your bills and while most of the greatest social movements in history were powered purely by an idea and people's belief in that idea real change in impact require resources real people do this work they need real change real impact and resources to actually make it happen the people that believe in this work have to have the support and the resources to do it that's where I come in I get essential resources into the hands of people and visionaries on the front lines doing work that
matters we spend the majority of our waking hours working we spend more time working than we do with our loved ones so I decided early on that I have to love my work and it has to add value and while I would love to be one of these people who spearheads you know social change from the ground up and the thing I realized early on in my nonprofit career is that the thing I'm good at the thing I'm really good at is raising money and I love it I think it is a privilege to work
alongside bold ambitious optimistic leaders and the organizations they serve so I teach people how to do the thing I'm good at because the more people that learn how to be good at my end of this work the more work will get done and I teach everyone I teach CEOs and presidents and boards of directors and Didi's I teach development directors and all sorts of teams and nonprofit newbies social change agents and candidates I teach anyone that wants to do something extraordinary how to fund their dream my dream is that there will be more people like
me doing this work well and that development will be an undergraduate course at universities so that fundraising animals like me will find this job out of the gate instead of discovering it years later accidentally I even have the curriculum developed but short of overhauling undergraduate course requirements I think tonight's probably a good first step to get people to think about fundraising more as an opportunity and less as a dirty word if you want to change the world you have to know how to pay for it to do that well you have to understand three big
things your feelings about wealth and money the importance of building relationships and how to ask for what you want let's start at the top your feelings about wealth and money what is your relationship to money money is complicated it makes everyone squeamish it makes everyone act kind of weird anyone who's ever had to split the check after dinner with friends can tell you this and imagine what it was like you know before venmo to help people learn how to raise money you have to help them understand their deal with money because everybody has baggage grow
up poor baggage grow up rich baggage mad or envious that other people have more money than you baggage I think people with money are smarter than you baggage feel guilty that you have more money than other people that's some first-class baggage still baggage people it's still baggage so whatever your deal is with your baggage you have to reconcile it if you're gonna be able to ask for money and here's a little tip about asking people for money the only difference about really wealthy people in us is that they have more money than us that's it
don't overcomplicate it they come with their own baggage when you think about how to do this work it's important to remember that money makes the world go around you hear that all the time but it's true whether you're a non-profit for a profit or you pay your own bills we often feel like talking about it is this icky embarrassing ugly thing but it's just money and it's a fact of life so how you feel about it directly affects how you approach it like everyone else when I started out in this work I had to examine
and understand my own feelings about wealth and money and I had to learn how to separate them from how I feel about raising money for important causes how I feel about asking for money to help people do good work in the world is not the same as how I feel about asking for money for myself this is an important distinction when I go and talk to someone I'm not asking them to pay my mortgage I'm giving them an opportunity to invest an idea that's gonna change the world for the better why should I feel bad
about that the answer is that I shouldn't I wouldn't feel bad about giving them the inside tip on a hot stock and I'm not gonna feel bad about giving them the inside tip on empowering social change either if you want to be good at raising money you have to be able to reframe the ask both for yourself and for other people as an opportunity next you have to get prepared to build some relationships people give to people they don't just give to ideas and if they don't believe in the person running the place you're already
dead in the water this is true whether you're in stocks or venture capital politics or nonprofits building a relationship with people takes work you have to care about more than just what you want or need you have to also value what someone else wants or need I know it's a shocking terrible idea but oftentimes closing gifts is understanding the person more it's important to know the product and if you think building a relationship with with people takes work building a relationship with someone you're asking for money from takes work and it takes homework have you
done any research do you have any idea what they care about do you know why they should invest in your work can you answer that question in less than 30 seconds if you can't the meetings gonna be it's gonna be pretty rough and the answer can't be because they're super rich and they live in your zip code when you talk to people and understand what they care about it has to be in person fundraising is relational it's not transactional and you have to ask them questions when I sit down with the donor it goes something
like this hi thanks so much for seeing me how have you been did you guys go anywhere fun over holiday nice I love Mexico do you always go to the same place oh that's awesome are those your kids they're so cute how old are they where are they in school oh that's a great school are you guys very involved there your spouse is on the board how's that I bet it's a ton of work how do you guys meet oh it's Santa Clara that's awesome are you super involved in the alumni network oh that's so
interesting where do you guys live again oh that's great is that your boat I literally go through all of these things right and you know why because guess what I know now I know they're out a hundred and twenty grand a year in schooling for the next 12 years right spouse is on the board of the kids school I know they're out 100k probably that's that's a six-figure they're both involved in their school alumni and that's probably 25k they told me they live on the Upper East Side I could look up their apartment online and
I can find out what their mortgages and I know they own a second home in Mexico oh and they own a boat which is like funny money right so what I now understand is true what I now understand is their thousand dollar gift is probably more of a starter gift and I should be thinking about ways to to help them partner with us and invest in a more meaningful way I know this sounds a tad mercenary I'm not confused about how it sounds but here's what I want to tell you because this is the part
that all my clients always want to skip because they think it's the fluff and it's not important if you don't understand what they care about and what they value how are you ever gonna be able to tell them about your work right I want them to fund our work I do but I also want them to have a really meaningful experience as a donor so that they feel like we're partners and not they're not an ATM right so it's important to ask the questions because the more you know about them and you know what they
value the more you can steer the conversation in a direction about your work that will resonate for them and once you get past the get to know you part you get into the fun stuff like why are you philanthropic at all right why do you invest in new ideas do you want giving back to be a value you pass on to your children can we help you do that it's really awesome it's meaningful and remember it's a conversation it's not a cross-examination it's not an interview don't walk in there and tell them everything you already
know about them because you did your research you don't get extra points for knowing how to use Google it's 75% them talking 25% you listening it's better to be a good listener than a good showman and once you understand what they care about you can talk to them what you care about right you can tell them about you now when you do this don't get too deep into the weeds or you'll lose them it's a lot like when I sit down with guys in finance right and I say you know how's work I'm looking for
like a thumbs-up thumbs-down but what I get sometimes is like a long just description of how the markets are trending and my brain leaves my body and starts to think about what time I dry cleaner closes like I don't have capacity for that and they don't have capacity for that level detail of our work if they want it they'll ask you the questions it's it's this this thing that happens over and over because I here's an example I worked with the CEO once and I was hired to teach him how to talk to human people
like a human person it was a very difficult job so he kept getting great donor meetings and he wasn't closing any gifts and I could not figure out what the problem was so finally I was like I'm just gonna come with you it's gonna be great so I went with him to meetings and what would happen was he was getting into such detail with the donors that their eyes were glazing over and then after he was done with his 15 minute pitch they literally would say this happened like three times in a row god that
sounds great congratulations keep up the good work and that was the meeting which was obviously not the outcome we were looking for so he couldn't understand what I was trying to say to him that I finally like in an act of sheer desperation was like you know what I love I love NASA I love NASA I think it is unbelievably amazing we have figured out how to get a person to the moon I think it's awesome I think the idea of getting someone to the moon and they walk on the moon and god I love
rocket ships I love rocket ships rocket ships are amazing but if you start to tell me about the rocket ship and how it gets to the moon and the math and the science equations on how the rocket ship gets to the moon I promise you I will hang myself with my own hair I was like that is not how you tell people about your work what is the need like what's the point right how do you address the need why are you better at it than anybody else and what can they do to be what
can you do to make it about them right how can they help you get to the moon that's the good stuff if you're able to do that you're probably ready to make the ask now I don't expect everyone to be super excited to ask people for money that's why development is an actual profession and not an awkward hobby naturally great fundraisers love people they can and will talk to anyone they can find common ground with anyone they're your friends that talk to people in the elevator or at the grocery store they believe in the work
required to both build relationships and keep them and they naturally have a high tolerance for rejection but I don't expect everyone to be a natural and you don't have to be a natural to raise money you just have to respect the people in the process and do the work will you reconcile your baggage will you commit to build relationships if you will you're ready to make the ask and the ask is oftentimes as simple as using the phrase would you consider would you consider becoming a monthly donor would you consider increasing your support to $100
would you consider investing in our work at the $1,000,000 level would you consider does a couple of awesome things one it gives the donor and easy way to out like they can say no without it being yes now and to gives you a second ask well what would you consider it's good right when you do this remember you're not asking for yourself you're asking on behalf of all of the people you serve or are touched by your genius this isn't a personal favor right feel proud of the ask it's incredible that you do this work
don't try to be someone you're not you're gonna go to these meetings and think you need to bigshot it be yourself authenticity matters nobody likes a phony just be yourself and please please don't Harvey do your own ask what I mean by this is don't walk into the meeting and say I had an IDI that did this all the time I stopped inviting him he'd say we're not here today to ask you for money yes we are that's exactly why we're literally that's why we're here today don't do that don't say whatever you can do
to help that is hands down the fastest way to get the smallest possible gift someone thinks they can give you and get away with not kidding and don't take it back once you've made the ask would you consider supporting us at the $10,000 level or the five or the two or one you know what take the year off you're the best thanks don't do that ask the question wait till ten count to ten before you speak again keep your face like this they are grown-ups they have all the power in this situation they can answer
the question don't take it back which brings me to my favorite don't ask don't get if you don't make an actual ask no one will give you actual money and if no one gives you actual and money you actually can't do anything with it it's very simple don't ask don't get listen I would love to live in a world or we didn't have to ask people for money to do important work that will change people's lives I would love to not have to teach people how to make a case for the importance of feeding and
housing and educating people but this is the world that we live in and if we're committed to doing this work and doing it well we have to be as committed to the art of funding this work as we are to the art of executing it I'm going to repeat that because I think it's really important we have to be as committed to the art of funding our work as we are to the art of executing that and it at its core the art of funding the work means that we have to truly believe that the
purpose and the privilege of our work is to provide people with an extraordinary way to use their wealth that will change people's lives it's an opportunity because at its core that's what it is how great is that thank you [Applause]
