-And now a message from the White House communications director. [ Camera shutter clicks ] -[ Laughing ] Hello, hello. All right, everybody, please shut up.
I'm Donald Trump's new communication director 'cause all the rest of them sorry asses got fired, and they only left with me. I'll be taking one question for each of you. Not two, one at a time.
Thank you so much. Yes? -Who are you?
-Yeah, um, my name is Madea -- Muh to the damn D-E-A. You only get a first name because I have warrants. Thank you so much.
Next question? Next question? Question?
Question? -Yeah. What makes you qualified to be communications director?
-Why do you think you get two questions? What, you feel entitled, white man? The reason I'm qualified to be communications director is because I'm here.
Now mind your damn business. Thank you very much. Next question.
-Wait. Did you even vote for Donald Trump? -Hell no.
I didn't vote for Trump. Only two black people voted for Trump. One was Ben Carson, and the other one was that man behind him at the rallies with the sign that say "Blacks for Trump.
" I'm not one of them. I voted for Hillary three times. Thank you very much.
Next. -Then why did you agree to do this job? -Why does anybody work for somebody they can't stand, they don't like?
They need a check. I need a C-H-E-Q, okay? So that's why the hell I'm here.
Thank you very much. Okay? I'm pulling a Scaramucci on this bitch.
After this is over, you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna be in this bitch for about 10 days, then I'm gonna do "Dancing With the Stars," and we gonna have a good time up in this bitch. -Isn't she great folks?
Isn't she great? Let me shake your hand. Let me shake your hand.
-D-D-Damn, Donald! What the hell? !
You got to watch it when you shaking your hand, 'cause if you shakin' with that right but on that left, he be reaching down, trying to grab my pu-- p-purse. -This was totally my idea, by the way. Of the 37 communications directors I've had, Madaca is the easily the best, believe me.
-Madea. -Maybelline. -Madea.
-Michelob Ultra. -Madea, man! -Not to be confused with media, which is all of you, and you're all fake news.
-The Donald, would you please go in the back? I told you I got this here. You getting ready to make me slap your ass back to reality television.
Okay. Now we going ahead, take some real questions, okay? Real questions.
Yes. The white lady. Thanks so much.
We gonna answer the white lady's question, yes. -What do you have to say about the administration's poor handling of disaster relief? -Well, I -- Well, have you looked at the administration?
It is a disaster, and I'm the relief. Next? -The president's been holding a lot of rallies.
Is he already campaigning for 2020? -I'm sorry. What was that about a Klan rally?
I'm sorry. What'd you say? -The president has been holding a lot of rallies.
Is he already campaigning for 2020? -I don't know, but I'm running for 2020. Yes, that's right.
It was Franklin -- Teddy -- Theodore W. Bush Roosevelt who said that we have nothing to fear but a mad black woman in the White House. We going in for Kaepernick.
Taking a knee. Taking a knee for Kaepernick. -Stand up, please!
Get up! Please get out.
