Foundational Principles For Male and Female Relationships | Dr. Myles Munroe

[Music] please get your bibles and turn with me to the book of matthew chapter 19. [Music] this chapter we've been exploring an answer that was given to an important question one out of every three marriages in this country will end in divorce Based on the statistics that we have in the united states it is said that one out of every two marriages with any divorce that means the chances of a person staying together is 50 that means for every five people that go before the altar five of them will end in tragedy Called divorce i've

done a very extensive research and also i've done a lot of teaching in the area of divorce and marriage one of our best-selling books addresses the subject the book is entitled single married separated and life after divorce the book has sold over 500 000 copies and i was shocked at the success of that book because I didn't expect that so many people had so many problems but then i began to appreciate that we were dealing with some issues that the church is very quiet about and the government doesn't know how to stop and the sociologists

don't know how to deal with it and that is the problems of relationship by the way i think it would be good for me at this moment to just Pause and introduce someone very important to me i want you to meet my very precious and special son charo monroe please stand up this is miles jr give him a big welcome to london my wife and i have two beautiful children and he is my only son of my loins i love him so much he's a a Student in school he is an academic and an athletic

award student and he's about to begin college in a few months and very disciplined young man who loves the lord i'm very proud of him divorce is not only a major problem but it was a major problem two thousand years ago and before Divorce is as old as the fall moses was the first person that we know in history to do something officially about marital disintegration moses developed a legislation introduced a bill in his constitutional course of leading a nation of over one million People of course he had to deal with these social problems and

he developed a bill that he introduced among the people to prevent people from destroying each other and that's why he introduced the bill of divorcement the ability of osman meant that a man in those days of course women were were less likely to have more rights Than they do today a man was the one to initiate this very traumatic horrifying experience of of officially separating a union and so in matthew 19 we find that the pharisees and scribes approached jesus and asked him about his view of divorce And jesus answered that question but he ignored

the issue in the sense that he really didn't deal with divorce because based on his answer he didn't see divorce as a problem jesus saw divorce as a symptom a problem has to do with a cause a symptom has to do with a sign so divorce is a sign that something else Is wrong it's like a pain in the body when there's a pain in your body the pain is not the problem the pain is an indication that there is a problem in fact your body was created by god to be such a unique machine

that whenever something was wrong with your body the neurological system which is your Nervous apparatus will communicate to your brain that something is wrong somewhere and the neurological impulses would send the signal of that problem to the brain the brain would then send a signal back to that area and tell the area to emit a signal That there's a problem there the signal that the area emits is called pain so when you feel the pain the pain is not the problem the pain is your neurological system telling your whole body that something's wrong in that

location and so you can then act and pursue the problem Divorce is that same way the fact that there's so many problems in our families and disintegrating marriages and broken homes is not the problem the problem is something else is wrong and divorce is the symptom that's why divorce is so painful let me say something about divorce i Want you to never forget divorce is worse than death write that down please divorce is worse than death and here's why as a matter of fact the word divorce is from the greek word apostasian an apostasian is

a big word but it simply means to defect To defect write that down so to divorce a person means you have defected defection is used in the military when a person have committed themselves to fight for a army or a cause when you join the army of a country or the navy or the marines you have committed yourself to fight for that country is that right is that right Now i want you to write this down whenever you join an army you have committed yourself not to live but to die armies are not motivated by

life armies are motivated by debt in other words when you join an army the best they can offer you Is death you don't fight in a war with the guarantee you're going to survive they can guarantee you that you might die now if you survive then they say you're a hero hello somebody in other words when you join an army you've committed yourself to death well the word used for divorce is the same word that is used for the Military and that is when you walk down an aisle and you commit yourself to another person

the man to the woman and the woman to the man you're not committing yourself to life and that's why marriages don't work because we keep getting married for life a little heavy isn't it when you walk down the aisle you are joining Yourself to someone just like you join yourself to an army and you are deciding that the only way i will be separated from you is by death now when you join an army and you decide with your brothers and your colleagues that you had enough of this uh the the enemy is too strong

the the Weapons they have are too awesome and you become afraid intimidated by the environment you become you're becoming so frightened by the reality that you decide to your colleagues you say to them i am no longer going to stay with you i'm going to turn back i'm going back home to be a civilian Then the army calls that defection the greek word is divorce what do you do when a soldier defects talk to me you don't call it marshall you kill that brother caught martial is formality when someone defects what they've done is they

have turned their backs on their very own flesh and the only thing a defector deserves in the military Is death why because the only thing that's supposed to separate you from your colleague is death so if the enemy don't do it for you come on understand the principle i just had a thought in your mind i see that thought if you ever leave me i will i can see that thought right now [Laughter] and that's exactly how you feel huh you ever heard this if i can't have you That's the spirit of defection see i

give you my whole life i give you my body i gave you my emotions i gave you my entire future i gave you everything and you were going to turn your back on it it's defection now why is divorce worse than death here's why when a person dies you take them To the mog they place them in a box you have a funeral everybody wears black you go to this place called the church you have a ceremony you take him to the cemetery you put them in a hole you put dirt on them you put

some flowers on them It's finished over there's closure you don't see them any harm ah but divorce it's worse than that because when you get a divorce it's dead the marriage is finished you bury it You walk away and then you go to the food store and there's resurrection again and that's why it's worse than death because they keep coming back you stand on the tube and there they are you stand in the bus stop there they are they show up in the drugstore there they are you go to the park there they are and

heaven help you they show up in church and there they are You see it's the kind of death that's never closed and when there's children involved that's why god says i hate divorce i hate it there's no arrangement in god's program for divorce moses wrote a bill not god so we find the question being asked here by jesus by the disciples rather i mean the Pharisees they said should a man divorce his wife for any reason matthew 19 3 his response haven't you read that at the beginning it was not so he made them male

and female for this reason should a man leave his mother and father cleave unto his wife and the two shall be united and become one flesh and then he goes on to say therefore whatever god joins together let no man put asunder i think what he was saying Here is that god don't join everybody together now this gets a little deep here the only people that god really joins together are those who qualify in this verse he says in the beginning it was not so so the people that god joins together are the people that

he identifies in this verse he says divorce is not your problem he says your problem is who you joined Together and you're not joining together who god joins together who did god join together well he qualifies it he says haven't you read that at the beginning it was not so in other words at the beginning god made a male and a female and that's the only two that should be joined together with a guarantee that they'll make it for life and for death and that is the two that are in the Beginning and we talked

yesterday about the kind of mail that is in the beginning i need a mail can i have a mail are you sure you are a male can i have you please can you come i need a mail the lord half a real male praise god some males in short emails now it's important to note i want to do something here to demonstrate something So i need you to stand up here for me stand on the top of that end of the step from the top right here okay i want to show you something it's down

at the top right there right at the top and i want everybody to kind of make sure you can see where he is i want to show you something okay now if you notice that god only created one human being from the soil he never went back today we have 6.2 billion people on Earth but god only made one from the soil he never went back today we got six billion but god only made one from the soil he never went back and the first one that god made was male that's important remember everyone who's

building anything the first thing they lay is the foundation is that right foundation is first and secondly the foundation is usually never seen after it's laid it's quiet it's always Underneath the building but the foundation is the most important part of the building because it holds up the entire structure and carries the weight of everything which means then that the foundation must be given a lot of attention to more money goes into a foundation than the whole building did you know that contractors will tell you that when they're laying the foundation they got to dig

down to bedrock and then they put All the steel and all the water all the concrete and they reinforce it and reinforce it and they build the foundation based on the proposed weight of the structure including the furniture the people and all the decorations and everything else in other words the engineer will calculate the weight of the entire building before he would give the specifications for the foundation because the foundation have to carry even the weight of the clothing that's On the people that's going to be sitting in the office and the chair and the

desk and the typewriter and all of the computers everything it has to be calculated and so the weight of the foundation is not laid until we understand the entire building now watch what god does before god began the human family god calculated everything that it would take to carry the weight of a human family and god's conclusion was i'm Going to construct a foundation and i'm going to call it male so the male man was built to carry all the weight of the family most males are not aware of this so they run away from

responsibility every male in this room was designed by god to carry the entire weight of your entire family you're built for it if you got 10 children you could carry That now let me explain why whatever something comes out of sustains it listen carefully and that's where the word father comes from father means source and sustainer the male came out of god god created the male out of himself that means the male source is god himself so god is the father Of the male it gets heavy here but the female did not come from the

soil the female came out of the male which means that the male has become the source of the female we learned yesterday that sauce is the hebrew word abba which we translate what Father so the male is the father of the female she's the he is the source and the sustainer of the female the word father means sauce and sustainer which means whatever you source you got to sustain now i need somebody uh uh let's see i need a tall person is anybody here seven feet can you come help me here you look tall come

i mean you man You should be glad to come i'm about to make you god stand behind him please well you ain't quite anyhow you you survive now the male came out of who god god is responsible for creating the mail but watch this then god created the female i need a lady please can i have a lady you want to be on tv here's your chance Come on girl thank you very much she's pretty too boy i tell you stand in front of him stand on the front of him that's good all right so

now we have the female coming out of the mail now remember christ's answer was to have a good marriage you got to go back to the beginning so you got to study what a male is like in the beginning and you get to study What a female is like in the beginning and once you can find that these two qualify by that criteria then that marriage will work so before you marry someone you've got to check them against the checklist of the beginning so don't just marry anybody make sure you marry the right ingredients what

christ was saying was divorce is not your problem the problem is the material that you use for the Marriage ain't no good see you can't get a divorce unless you were married and you can't get mad unless there were two individuals and your character in business there was one individual in other words it begins with the one and then it be then it produces the other and then you have the two now i need a a male and female can have a male and female can you come yeah come on down here Give a good

hand to our pianist boy he's all right i tell you turn around and step right there stand next to him please i want to show you all something now now once you see how this is building we got god who produced adam the male who produced eve the woman so god is the father of the male the male is the father of the female and when you put them two together you produce a Marriage so marriage is when those two come together and they are the right ingredients i'm going to show you why family is

the key to the whole thing now what kind of male is the beginning male let's write down the things we learned yesterday number one the first thing about the first male is that he had a clear self-image he knew he was the image of god That means you don't want to marry a man who's still trying to be like other people you want to marry a man who knows who he is he knows his self-image he doesn't need anyone's approval to feel important he doesn't try to dress like other people and wear everybody's style he

doesn't go around trying to buy nikes and trying to be tommy hilfiger trying to wear you know calvin klein and he's trying to be somebody else trying to fix His hair like other people and trying to be a rapper or trying to be cool you want somebody who knows he's somebody not anybody being anybody you want a man whose self confidence and self image is in god not in any style or any role model somewhere else second thing about this man is that god took the man and placed him in the garden of eden the

word eden means Presence please get that book on praise and wish to understand what that word means eden so the first thing is the man has a good clear image self-image secondly he is well in the presence of god the third thing about the male man that's important important is that the male man was given the first command and that is work so you want a mailman who is working and loves to work you meet him working Fourth thing about the male man in genesis chapter 1 and chapter 2 rather you find that this man

in verse 15 god secondly told him to cultivate that means you need a male man who can cultivate you to cultivate means to bring the best out of to develop you to advance you don't marry a man who cannot improve you i've met ladies who've got a good job good education got a nice car a nice apartment got her own life going Together and then she marries a bum she marries a guy who drives her car eats her food watches her television sleeps in her apartment while she's out to work that's not a woman that's

a fool you don't marry a man who decreases your value you want to marry a guy who will increase and improve your value [Applause] some of you ladies get so desperate because you're 30. you grab anything that comes along in The pants and destroy your quality life the fifth thing that this man is genesis 2 15 god told a man to guard the garden that means a true male is a protector if a man can't protect you he's not deserving of being your husband a true male protects females he doesn't use a strain to abuse

them and hurt them and domestically violate them he doesn't rape them he doesn't Cause date rape or beat his wife or harass his children or commit incest on his little girl or sodomize his son that's not a real man buy this tape for someone you know a real man protects everything under his care as a matter of fact the best things that's supposed to be heard by a man when he comes home is when his wife says daddy's home now everything's okay the most beautiful thing a child should Say to a father is my daddy's

home now you touch me he'll kill you that's what a child needs to say and a mother needs to say about her husband she's going to be able to say my my warrior in shining armor is here my protector has arrived he's a god and then number six the real man is the man who god says do not touch The tree this is my command that's found in verse 17 of genesis 2. in other words the the male was given the word of god not the female which means that the male was designed by god

to be the teacher of the word one who keeps the word and that means the male supposed to be the one who knows the word the commandments of god to communicate to his family that means a real man knows this book called the bible back to front Don't marry a man who can't teach you the word and some of y'all is too late there are men who know the name of everybody on the soccer team but can't list the disciples they know the score of every game the last year but don't know the chapters in

ibaka they spend hours watching television football but spend no hours in the word of god that's not a good man to marry i'm gonna preach it baby [Applause] man you've got to be like adam if you want to guarantee a good home so he must be aware of his image in god he must be in the presence of god love to be in the presence of god don't marry a man that you got to drag to church don't marry a man that you got to Encourage to have devotions in the home don't marry a man

who stands up at his arms for while everybody is worshiping don't marry a cool fool somebody's just cool you know worship is for women man i'm cool man i ain't gonna stop me no fool man i'm a brethren man i'm cool no you're a fool man [Applause] if you study the word of god All the priests all the priests who worship were male 2 you know who were god's best friends three worshipers and they were all men and some you say well man worshipping is for is for weak man worshiping is for sissies you know

what should bring this folk jelly back man man oh really let me ask you a question you ever killed a nine foot giant with a rock ever killed a bear with your bare hands You say you're a man you ever killed a lion with your own fist you ever killed ten thousand men with your own sword oh you think you're a man now you ever ran a country and built a city and established the most powerful empire in the world 3 000 years ago built it from nothing you think you're a man what have you

done you ever killed a giant who cursed at you and you cut his head off and you Were just four feet and he was 10 feet you ever done that you ain't no man until you can write the largest worship book in the bible by david you ain't a man yet [Applause] real men worship say with me real man worship that's why god loved david he was a real man he wasn't a punk like you You can't handle a little pressure when a baby comes you can't buy milk and handle diapers you can't pay light

bill on water bill you want to abandon the woman you ain't no man oh don't get me excited now oh i was about to give it to women today i'm sorry hang on guys i'm i'm gonna get there don't worry i'm gonna get there [Applause] All the men say real man worship say it loud real man worship one more time give the lord a hand you learn that you make sure you be in church before your wife sitting on the front row of every church service from now on should be all the men don't drop

your kids to worship service you lead them in the service lift your hands and show your wife how To do it and if you got a girlfriend you tell her right away if you don't want to go to worship with me you can't be with me i'm talking to the brothers now if she don't want to go to church with you brother you better leave her out of your life [Music] real man worship god loved david because he was a Worshiper he loved abraham because everywhere abraham stopped he built an altar what's an altar a

worship center the guy loved to worship moses i mean moses told god i don't care what you do if your presence don't go with me i ain't going that's a real man a real man says i don't gonna go without your presence real men worship now so god has a man watch this he has a Male the male is in his image he's in his presence he's working he's cultivating he's protecting and he knows the word anybody got it he's in his image he's in his presence he's working he's cultivating and he knows the word

and he's Protecting everybody get it are you sure now this is important man christ says gotta go back to the beginning man who's the beginning man he knows his image he's in god's presence he's working he's cultivating he can protect and he knows the word then god says next verse it's not good for this man to be alone so the only man that shouldn't be alone is a man who knows his image Who's in god's presence who's working can cultivate you can protect you and can teach you the word that means if a man doesn't

know who he is is not in god's presence cannot cultivate you cannot protect you cannot teach you god's word it is good for that man to be alone so then god says it's good for this man not to be alone to be all by himself to be all in one so god went inside the man And pulled out a another man and he built this one and made it a wound man so now we have a man with a womb so she's called a wound man they're both man but this one has a wound then

god took the warm man listen carefully ladies and if you read the bible you've got to be careful how you read the bible don't read into the bible read out of the bible the bible says he bought her to the Man and presented her to him now the the hebrew language here is very interesting god did not bring adam a wife god never told adam he will make him a wife he said i'd make him a helper suitable for him not a wife just a helper someone to help him carry out his dominion responsibility the

word there is present present in hebrew means to parade before which means that god will never choose your Mate he'll just parade people in front of you you've got to make the choice uh-oh now we've been taught by many people well the lord chose my spouse the lord listen you think the lord is that stupid if god chose your mate then you could blame him for everything that's wrong in your marriage no it says god presented her to the man he paraded her in front of him and that's why god never touches the choice You

choose who you want to marry your mom says you make your bed and you sleep in it right sure in other words whoever you marry that was your choice now there's some ladies walking around here with some funny ideas they want a prophetic word about their husband you know but the lord told me brother you're supposed to marry me that's a lie Or the lord said to me in a dream last night that when i see a man coming to church today with a green tie and a red pants that'll be the one and then

10 guys show up in green ties and red pants see these funny things we go through see it's a lie if god chose your spouse he would violate your will and if god could choose without your involvement then tell me this Which is more important salvation or marriage salvation obviously it's eternal and yet god can't choose your salvation he died for you went to hell for you rose again he has the power of death held in the grave he's the right on under power and he says now whosoever will you still gotta choose to be

born again he can't born you again without your permission so if god can choose your salvation Which is eternal how dare you think you'll choose your marriage this is temporary so stop the spooky stuff especially the ladies the lord spoke to me that you were going to be my husband i'm already married now what do you do when that happens and i've had problems like this in my counseling sessions god doesn't choose your mate when god Presented that woman parade before adam if you read the bible carefully god didn't speak i don't started talking and

adam said whoa man god that's a good name adam said in genesis chapter 2 he says this is bone just like my bone the structure and flesh like my flesh there's no hair on her like the animals i know no scales no feathers flesh just like mine Have structure i've never seen a creature standing upright monkeys can't do it they gotta always be like this you see so i'm not their cousin because they don't walk like me they walk like this that cancels evolution all right finish that finish all right and adam said i've never

seen an animal with structure like mine upright bone just like my bone fresh just like my flesh i will call her wound man Because she's the man taken out of me who has a womb then the next verse adam began to prophesy he never should have prophesied and adam said for this cause god i think god blew his mind when he saw that lady he says but it's called should a man leave anybody he was talking to who talking about his father god he said what is god should a man leave his father and his

mother and Cleave under this thing his wife and the two shall become one flesh what kind of woman is this woman let's talk about the woman then we're going to wrap it up [Laughter] all the men sit up straight and smile it's going to be your time now the woman that came out of adam now i'm going to give you a list up on The board you can write them down real quick the man is a spirit the woman is a spirit remember they're both man the man has no gender because he is spirit the

woman have no gender because she's a spirit in other words spirits have no gender there's nothing in the bible referring to a male or female spirit so every female in here has a man on the inside a spirit being Number three the man the spirit man of god's nature the woman is also a man she's got god nature fourthly the man is eternal that's a spirit spirits cannot die the man and the woman is also eternal the man is the glory of god the nature of god the woman is the glory of god the nature

of god the man is the image of god the woman is the image of god so all spiritually they are all equal By the way if you don't believe in women preaching then here's a solution close your eyes and listen let the man preach if the house disturbs you then close your eyes so you can't see the house and let the resident preach you'll get it when i'm gone by the way i've heard ministers say i Don't believe in women preaching women shouldn't be in the ministry my problem with that is simple who did jesus

leave the world in the hands of a woman [Applause] you missed it the church is not a man the church is a woman and he said to the woman go into all the world and Well i'll leave that there you can deal with that so every man in here is a part of a woman who's preaching it's quiet okay read the word deal with it yourself you see inside this female is a man she's a spirit being that's why the male and female are equal but different what makes them different is their bodies the house

they live in Now this female is unique let's see the difference between a male and female and see what kind of woman you need to marry first of all the male is dirt let's get the word humans from and the female is dirt she's taken out of the man and god built her out of the man the female like the male is physical They're not spirit they are physical the man on the inside is spirit but the body is physical dirt thirdly the male is sensual the female is sensual in other words the bodies operate

on senses fortly the male is the temple of the spirit well the female is a temple of the spirit fifthly the male must be managed well the female must also be managed these bodies need to be controlled by us Managed got no problem with that well here's the difficulty now the male was placed in the garden first the female was presented to the male in the eden second in other words the female met the man in the garden the issue is this you should always marry a man who you meet in the garden Meet a

man in the presence of the lord you can't go wrong you don't go out of the present lord to find a man and try to get him back into the presence of the lord she met adam in eden secondly the mayor was given work first she was created to help him work number four the man was given the word first but she was not given the word directly which means that she was supposed to be the recipient of the word Through the mail and fifthly he was given an assignment first she was assigned to dominate

with him which means she's also a dominator well here comes the difficulty the male is a responsible head hair doesn't mean better it means responsible the female was sent to help him she's a helper secondly the male is the provider He is the source she's supposed to be the incubator he's the cultivator she's supposed to be the producer fourthly he is the giver she's supposed to be the receiver he's a protector she's supposed to be the encourager he's a developer she's supposed to be the nurturer he is the source of the as a teacher she's

supposed to be the resource the one who gives the commands after she learns them from her husband I'm moving quickly for a reason she he is the teacher but she is the prophetess now let me explain what a female supposed to be let's go down the list first of all a female supposed to be a helper in other words a woman in the beginning was a woman who was designed by god and equipped by god to help a a male fulfill the assignment that god put him In in his life to do his vision so

a woman is not the one who comes to destroy what the man's vision is you don't want to marry a woman who comes to tell you how to run your life all right let me explain this another way you don't marry a man and then try to dictate how he's supposed to live ladies you're quiet all the men say amen it's your turn now so sit up straight And take it god says i will make for him a what a helper now a helper is not the one who runs the show you don't want a

woman see the reason why marriages don't work is because we got a monster a monster as any creature with two heads a wise woman helps her husband achieve oh boy a good woman Studies her husband you all better write this stuff down a good woman studies her husband and she constantly she doesn't now listen carefully the difference she doesn't irritate him she doesn't criticize him secret lady what a real woman does is she keep asking him questions she tries to find out what his dream is what his vision is what his desires are Her goal

is to study him uh honey what do you want to do in the next 10 years sweetheart what do you see us coming to the next 20 years honey how do you see us developing in our children what do you see the future of our home is baby can you tell me what do you see for the business uh every item what are you gonna do with you're gonna stay in this job forever what are you gonna think about this what are you gonna keep asking questions why you want to get his Vision most women

come home where you been how come you're doing nothing oh lazy thank you we ain't going nowhere what we going with our family what's wrong with you you just like my daddy you worse than my daddy that's a stupid woman a woman from the beginning is a helper and you can't help somebody Who you don't know the assignment even if your husband is not the ideal man you are supposed to help him become that maybe he doesn't know the bible like you but don't sit down and say let's have devotions and then you say to

him why can't you find corinthians you're not helping the guy you are demeaning his ego you're Destroying his pride no wonder why he doesn't devotions anymore he's supposed to buy him a bible with the little tabs on the outside [Applause] come on somebody you got to help him when he can't find it tell him honey i know you could i i'm gonna wait till you find it baby cause i don't know where it is myself just go right ahead baby you can find corinthians come on honey i know you know how you got it baby

yes Sir now let's go to chapter six baby yeah i know you can read this now baby and i'm gonna believe everything you say baby help the man all the men say right on [Applause] the bible says that a woman builds her house with her hands but tears it down with her mouth all the men say [Music] so women if you want to be blessed just Shut up [Applause] [Laughter] i better stop my time is just about gone all the men say help me don't kill me you are supposed to be a helper now let

me tell you something about helping watch this the holy spirit is called the very same thing a woman is Called he's called the paracletus which means one who comes alongside to help paraclete jesus called him comforter paraclete so the holy spirit does not take over your life he never does he always comes to help you do what you are doing that's why it's not a prep a proper prayer for you to pray for the holy ghost take over a meeting he wouldn't do It that's an insult to him he's not built to take over a

meeting if you don't plan he has nothing to do so man what you got to make sure you do is make sure the woman that comes into your life you have a plan for your life before she comes because you see a woman comes loaded a woman comes with equipment ready to help she got intuition she got intelligence she got wisdom she got insight she got sensitivity she's got power she's got Incubation she got all this anointing and she comes and she comes into your life to help you but if you ain't doing nothing she

can't help you do nothing sit down ladies i'm not getting rid of you yet now some women come into man's life and the men are doing something but she is so possessed with her own importance that she believed that what she's doing is more important than what She meets him doing and now she wants to tell him to forget what he's doing and try to do what she's doing that's usurping authority over a man stop it ladies man make sure you have a vision before you invite a woman into your life but women if you

meet a man with a vision don't create two visions in the house submit your vision to his vision [Applause] Write the void vision down please v-i-s-i-o-n now write the prefix down die d i the prefix die means two two two now put die in the front of vision what do you get division what's division two visions in the same place that means if a woman comes with her own vision and doesn't submit to the man's vision you got division that's the word for divorce so don't come at your bank account and Tell your husband i'm

gonna have my own bank account no no no the family is a business and you put all the resources in the same place and then if you decide as a company to divide the account you do it as a company don't come there with your own private secret vision oh i need some time to teach you on this stuff you see we we got this idea that what is mine is mine what is yours is yours that ain't family that's division The woman is a helper not a destroyer secondly ladies you are a producer when

the man cultivates you you produce things if a man gives you a sperm you produce a child if a man give you a home you produce a beautiful house to live in if mine give you groceries you produce a meal you are a producer and sometimes people produce things that Ain't good for the man a woman is also a very important word an incubator god designed the female to be an incubator her whole body is incubation an incubator is it's something that gives life to everything if whatever you give an incubator it gives it life

and it gives it back to you whatever you give an incubator it multiplies it gives it back To you that's why women must be careful what they listen to on who they listen to and what they hear because women incubate everything if you give a woman a word she gives you a sentence back if you give her a sentence you get a paragraph you know speaking the truth if you give her a paragraph you can get Yourself a book [Applause] if you give a woman one sperm you're going to get a sperm back she going

to give it life multiply it and give you what a baby millions of sperms you give her a house no problem she gives you a home she makes it beautiful she multiplies it gives you a beautiful home you give her groceries and a bag She gives you a meal you give her frustration she multiplies it and gives you hell she incubates everything so if you give a woman gossip you know when the bible talks about gossip it usually refers to the females you wonder why huh and why say the woman destroys with a mouth because

a woman keeps multiplying stuff so women if you want to be a good Wife make sure you receive the right stuff because whatever you receive you're going to multiply remember are you going to give it to your husband so if you're on the phone talking all day to a woman who's divorced and you're not [Applause] if you talk to women whose marriages ain't working all the time and they keep talking to you he gonna get into your Womb and then your husband come back and you start speaking negative and suspicious things to your husband when

in fact you were receiving that junk from your friend on the phone no wonder why peter says women be like sarah live a quiet life have a quiet spirit don't be noisy don't be gossipers why because whatever you receive you dump on your husband watch those soap operas you're watching all the time You're an incubator you produce what you keep listening to a man is a protector a woman is an encourager this is very important the female at the beginning adam had a woman who was his helper when a man begins to share his dream

with you you need to encourage him you ever heard a man talk His vision to his wife and she says that's impossible you you ain't got no education you don't have the right contacts you don't have the right associations you don't have the right personality and by the time she's finished with him his dream is dead she's supposed to be a helper suppose encourage the man even when it seemed impossible If anyone's supposed to cheer her on it's supposed to be her most men are afraid to go home so they stop at the pub they

spend hours with the brothers who encourage them to build their courage up to go home to face the one who destroys them you wonder why your husband won't come home much and he comes on after you sleeping it's safe then You're saying funny some of you wondering sometimes you wonder why your husband like to be in church all the time church is safe some men work late because home is too dangerous no encouragement home where you been why are you late why are you wearing that shirt i don't like them shoes why are you here

so bored what's going on with your life why are you so Stupid you're just like your daddy he's just like your friend he can and by the time the guy is that let me get out of here so peter says go on the roof and sleep you supposed to make your home such a comfortable place that he can't wait to get home all the men say amen [Applause] sometimes the most dangerous place for a husband is his house Because all he hears is negative discouragement i tell you a good woman makes a man find it

hard to go to work in the morning [Music] he runs to the door runs back to her runs to the door and say honey you just make it so hard he runs to the car he drives down the street he reverses back home comes back he goes to the workshop i'll be right Back y'all goes back home that's how you gotta make him make it hard for any woman to stop him on the way [Applause] my wife is a dangerous woman man ladies you ain't got a chance with this handsome guy you ain't got a

chance [Applause] my wife do me so good that when i see you you don't exist [Applause] My home is my haven i can't wait to get home she makes the home so safe from all the pressure out there encourager a woman is a receiver that means women always want what they say she's built to receive huh now ladies listen carefully you are a receiver by design that's why god created malls Shopping centers were made for women not for men now this means that a woman whatever she sees she desires so a woman never have enough

pair of shoes anywhere in the house she sees another one she wants that she's another one she wants dresses she wants them all she drive past the house i want that baby i want a house just like that You can't afford it but she wants it now ladies this creates a problem if you notice in the book of proverbs 31 it says something about that noble woman it says she doesn't cause her husband to go after spoil very important statement you keep missing there a good woman doesn't cause her husband to go after spoil what

that means is a good woman even though she sees everything she wants she doesn't Pressure her man to go get it some of you women are demanding things that are putting pressure on the family you making your husband go out and half kill himself on two jobs because you want to keep a car that you can't pay for the pressure you put on your husband to move in an area to build a house right from zero you just got married now you want a house that's worth 200 million pounds Put pressure on the guy you

want to wear the shoe that other people are wearing listen the lady wearing them shoe she being married for 20 years you just got married you can't afford those shoes [Applause] don't put pressure on the man if he buys you a pair of shoes and they plastic kiss him for it thank you baby appreciate it nothing is worse than a husband buying Something for a woman and she doesn't wear it i'm giving you a hint women wear it if you don't like it pretend just wear the thing [Applause] why because when you don't appreciate what

your husband gives you it's an insult to his manhood oh you're quiet now [Music] i don't like this house this stove ain't Working i don't like this phrase shut up and enjoy it for a while tell them honey i believe god's gonna bring us up he gonna bring us out i'm with you honey we're gonna pray together believe god for a better flat in our own home someday yes baby keep encouraging him stop complaining don't put pressure on the man you cannot have everything you see and it's quiet let me do the last one because

my time Is gone i got so much more to give you everybody say prophetess let me explain this to you uh a female is an incubator that means she receives information she expands it and she gives it back to you a female never keeps anything incubators do not keep anything Now they may hold it for a while but you will eventually get it back and it'll never come back the way you gave it it comes back multiplied a woman will be under pressure for 20 years and then one day all of a sudden she goes

crazy on you she cusses you and throws stuff at you picks up the refrigerator and throw at you now this incubation spirit is Interesting that's why a woman is called a prophetess now when you let me let me give you a little hint in joel chapter 2 jova says in the last day the holy spirit will come upon all flesh because in those days when he came upon the priests and upon the high priest and upon the prophets but he said the last days he's going to come upon everybody but then he says it's going

to affect Certain people differently it comes upon the young they will see visions when it comes upon the old man they will have dreams when it comes upon the women the handmaids it says they will prophesy now why is it different you see when a man tells a woman something she incubates it and then she gives it back to him so a woman is really a natural prophet So if you want to hear something again tell your wife if you don't want to hear it again don't tell her if you want to hear something again

just tell a woman i'll give an example between the brother and sister ashamed okay watch this brother matthew tells his wife the lord told me to build a school and Do all this stuff and do this and do this and do this and she goes you know praise the lord praise the lord amen good honey praise the lord and she tells him he does all this stuff and she said praise the lord fine ten months later he's discouraged he said this ain't working the people ain't cooperating can't get the property i'm gonna quit And she

says quit what and then she says you told me that god told you and then she lets him have it now while she's giving it back to him he he cries out shut up stop irritating me that ain't irritation brother that's prophecy she prophesying back to you say woman stop irritating me now the invitation she Giving you back what you gave her but now it's coming multiplied she began to add stuff to it you told me that god told you on september 9th at 2 am and she knows the details am i right about it

brother now man when the woman starts doing that that's not irritation that's prophecy you tell your wife from now on you know i've been to the conference and catching a champion and i heard brother miles Again get my house in order honey from now on we gonna have devotions every morning she said yes praise it she's so happy yo praise the lord thank god for brother miles hallelujah finally got devotions in the house yes we gonna have devotion six o'clock every morning get the kids together we're gonna pray before we go to work in school

so you please get everybody yes ma'am are you happy so the first week you do fine Second week you're okay third week you didn't get up and she comes sweetheart and you go sweetheart sweetheart what do you want woman it's time for devotion what devotions then she says didn't you tell me that god told you that ain't negan that's prophecy she's giving you back your own prophecy you Told her you're going to get up for devotions now the prophecy is coming back out of the prophet is saying get up let's have devotions don't get mad

at her get mad at your own inconsistency now ladies don't bring prophecies that he didn't give you [Applause] that's irritation so if you want to be blessed as a woman Be a helper a helper is a person who always is there to assist i want to close on something that i hope you will get this oh that's too much information you can't take that okay i won't bother with that someday we'll come back and brother matt and i will do a week of conferences for family how about that brother man We're gonna work on this

now i want you to stand there for a minute i need i need another male and female please can i have you two please i want you to stand on this third step can you take your pen and write this down please write this down i'm gonna give you the the needs of a man a woman okay now i need Are there little any little kids in here young kids can you come here baby come here i need another little kid oh she's so pretty oh man oh what's your name marianne marianne stand up the

steps right next to that pretty girl right there right next to you stand up better handsome guy on this side all right standing by him now come over right on top of the step there i'll go back right Good i want you all to see something here okay now what i need is i need about five men to come and stand and i need five women to come can it just quickly i want to show you a picture five men five women okay you stand here and then off the steps stand up here one two

okay stand next to him it's not on the steps okay Women can you come stand up here i need two women on the steps i want you to see a picture you stand right next to her stand right next to her all right now i want you all to remember what you see okay the number one need of a male write this down is sex write that down you need to know that the number one need of a male is sex i Didn't say the number one mean need of a man because the man is

spirit a man needs god but the number one need of a male is sex why because the male is designed by god to be a pro generator that means a male is always full of seed his purpose in life is to provide seed that's why every male right now is carrying half a billion sperms in his loins right now he's a seed carrier So his number one purpose in life is to provide the genes or the generations or the generations the genes for the generations so a male is designed by god to produce generations that's

why when god want to create a nation he never went to woman he went to a man because a man carries the generations he said abraham a nation shall come from you and sarah will incubate the nation so the man needs sex the man doesn't Want sex he needs sex say he needs it men don't want sex they need sex a need is something that helps you function a car doesn't want gas me to need gasoline if you don't have gas in the car it stops functioning a need is not a want men do not

want sex they need sex don't look at me so funny lady say hallelujah anyhow i'm trying to give you some education so you don't get in trouble Now because a man number one needed sex because he's driven by the divine purpose to produce seed that's why men have no cycles a man have no menstruation cycle he's always ready all the time every day all day anytime anywhere the guy's ready all the men say right on don't look so quiet on me now come on brothers help me out you help me out here now So you

see a man ain't got to build up the sex he's just ready and he ain't got no cycle so he's ready even when you are not ready creates a problem now most women who are married especially you christian women some of you all think that your husband got a demon [Laughter] what's wrong with you man you had it Last night this morning again what's wrong with you and yesterday you had a day before you're sick man i'm gonna pray for you i'm gonna take you to pastor matthew and cast up this nymphomaniac demon you are

full of the devil [Applause] and so you take your husband down to the to the office you make an appointment to see brother matthew and say pastor my Husband have a demon he's a nymphomaniac he won't leave his hands of me you got to pray for him cast the demon out and brother matthew says i got the same demon [Applause] can i hear an amen brothers come on brother matthew help me out here amen brother that ain't no demon all the men say amen all the men say leave the demon alone [Applause] your husband is

not sick he's normal and if anybody here want to be too spiritual any brother gonna be so spiritual if you don't have this same desire you need prayer [Applause] now the question is Why is a woman's need not sex a woman's number one need is not sex now she she likes sex sex is good for a woman and she enjoys it but it's not her motivational deed a woman's number one need is not sex write it down her number one need is affection affection is not sex brothers as a matter of fact sex is the

result of affection to a woman If you give her affection you'll get your need man [Applause] [Music] [Applause] now some of you ladies need some help if you go to bed in the night you got on all this clothes socks long mitten dress time on your head you got wrapped up all around your body The guy got to fight to find something i mean you got to stop this [Applause] [Music] all the men are shouting now boy ladies you want to be a good wife make it easy go with nothing on say good night baby

come on to bed [Applause] i'm talking to wives now if you ain't married this ain't for you [Applause] Some men feel like they are raping their wives ladies you ever wonder why paul says your body is not your own because sometimes you don't feel like it the problem is he always feels like it now women have four seasons summer winter autumn and spring so men you got to be sensitive when it's winter leave her alone buy her flowers kiss her hug her but don't touch her That's winter you own the cold brother control yourself right

mama you acting so spiritual now you know it's true when it's winter time baby you don't want nobody to touch you right now it's winter then there's autumn autumn means that things begin to change begin to warm up a little bit but you still ain't interested right now then spring comes spring means everything's coming back to life maybe You just get it on here then summer comes who is so hot she grabs you in the bed come on yeah and then there's winter again you out in the cold again so men we got to be

sensitive even though you're ready all the time she ain't a good marriage is built on a man who understands sensitivity and a woman who understands the need of a man now i'm going to tell you something Ladies a man doesn't want sex i like what paul says paul says don't you be spiritual now ladies i'm talking about going on missions i'm gonna fast and pray for three weeks i'm gonna just what the bible says don't you go and fast and pray unless you first ask not god but your husband so you can't tell your husband

the lord told me to fight ah you gotta tell god your husband told you you could that would the scriptures teach And then the bible says and after you finish fasting after he allows you to go and fast and pray it says hurry back to the bed why because sister mabel in the church will provide what he needs if you don't don't look at me funny while you all have admission someone on a mission with your husband because he doesn't want it he needs it oh i got four more to give you but the time's

gone okay Let me just close by saying this ladies and gentlemen marriage is a honorable thing but the bed is undefiled you keep it pure by understanding the needs and what you see in the front here is the beauty of god's creation notice who's on top who's on top god everything came from god who's the first one that he made the male out of the male okay what the female and out of That came what the marriage and the marriage produce what a family and they finally produce what a community a community is a multiplication

of families what is a nation a multiplication of communities so all of us are the nation that there is a community and that is the family and that is the marriage and that is the female and that is the male and that is god now Whenever there's a problem in the nation here's how you solve it whenever there's a problem in the nation if it's aids if it's promiscuity if it's divorce or whatever you've got to go backward to find the problem so you start going back to the the to denominate the problem you if

the nation has a problem you go check the community see what's wrong well the communities are made up of what Families so you go back and you check the family and you check the family something's wrong with the family you find out why something must be wrong with the marriage you check the marriage something's wrong the marriage then something must be wrong with the woman well why is something wrong with the woman because something must be wrong with the man And then the man got to go to who we got to go to god and

when you go to god and god says let's reverse it let's find out who the problem is and it begins with who the man he will come and return the hearts of the fathers back to the children a woman is as good as the men make them And the marriages are as good as the male and female singles that are in it marriage is like an omelette it's only as good as the eggs if you got a rotten egg and a good egg no matter how good the good egg is the omelet is going to

be rotten so before you yoke up with somebody check and see if there's any cracks in their character make sure that they are not defective Because you're going to marry the defect and your relationship will become a defective one christ said it well divorce is not your problem he says check back and see what the family is like if the family ain't working see what the marriage is like the marriage ain't working check and see what the singles are like and if the singles are contaminated the marriage is naturally contaminated And therefore check the male

and female first before you begin to blame god because the ingredients determine what kind of cake you have if you're gonna have a good family you're gonna need to check the quality of the people that make up the marriage singleness is more important than marriage because your marriage is only as good As your singleness and if you want your marriage to improve don't ask your mate to improve you improve and it will automatically improve because you are your marriage if you are unmarried today is more important for you to be single than to be married

and make sure that before you give yourself to somebody that you have Checked and studied them and explored them and you understand that you are getting someone that is going to be as close as possible to the beginning man and woman you want a woman who can be a helper one who can incubate your dream one who can can help encourage you to pursue god's will for your life you want a woman who will be the the kind of stamina that can be there won't criticize you but it'll be a healing bomb in your times

of Stress you want a woman who will not become your number one critic but your number one protection you want a woman who will be there to make it feel good to come home ladies build your house up with your hands and protect it with your mouth and don't keep company with people who are failing Because you'll incubate their failure and bring it to your own house i want you to know this is god's will right here he's the foundation of the family and he's put the mail as a responsible head now when the nation

falls apart you gotta go and check the mail i hope that this conference have made you aware that the key to healing london Is in the man sitting next to you may you buy these tapes listen to them a thousand times and let the principles preserve your life and if you do i know that i will see you at the top god bless you thank you very much