any advice on finding the love of your life of my life this is this is uh why alex's single response why any advice yeah actually this comes from a friend of mine who's in a really excellent marriage with great kids and family and high demand life it it's a decision like at some point you just priority you just prioritize it as okay i'm going to make this happen one way or another and um you don't force the discovery of that person but i mean i've occasionally said hey i think you should meet this person or
that person and um well it wasn't maybe my judgment was might have been off but the timing wasn't right or something but i think that yeah it's a decision and it also has to do with life structure i mean there were years so i when i was in graduate school i didn't want a girlfriend i just wanted to be in lab and i sure i had romantic dating interests but i wasn't going to meet them through a committed you know live together situation wasn't where i was at and as a postdoc here things are a
little different etc etc so but at some point it's sort of like what do i want my daily routine to look like because ultimately a relationship however one structures is going to be part of your daily routine so at the point where you're like you know i'd really love to wake up next to somebody and do blank and blank together and then i'd love to work and then we meet for dinner and then we you know take the dog for a walk or take kids out or whatever it happens to be take a trip but
do you have to be one has to be in the mindset of wanting to do couple like things people and a lot of people don't think about it that way they they either fall into something or they they don't see the benefits of coupling up i think that the pandemic um tuned people's awareness to the fact that some things are indeed easier on your own it depends on finances etc etc but a lot of things are made better done with other people 100 percent but i also so i was very deliberately it's an interesting way
to put it like what do you want your day to look like i think what what do you want your day to look like what you want your life to be i was very deliberately always uh first of all happy to be alone like a conscious thinking uh i know a lot of friends were just unable to be alone i'm able to be alone but i'm much happier with another person like i'm able to share joy with other humans i look forward to the day that our kids are rolling jiu jitsu and my kids are
you know hanging out with your kids and um if that notion sounds even remotely interesting then and fun then then it's sort of like you kind of backpedal from that and you go how do you get how do you you know engineer and think from first principles about love you
