i got rich and famous but i lost GOD...

at 26 years old I've pretty much accomplished everything you could think of I got millions of followers I got millions of dollars my mama's good she lives in her dream house I just picked up my dream car this week it's a crazy McLaren um I done did it all it feels like I traveled the whole world but something still feels like it's missing I did a video like a month ago talking about how I was feeling a bit depressed and a bit down after selling my company and every body no joke hundreds and hundreds and

hundreds and hundreds of comments maybe even thousands of comments recommended me to read my Bible and you know I have had uh Christian parents and my grandparents were Christians and it was always something that was in the house but I never myself identified as a Christian I I really never did and in fact for a long period of my life and excuse me I look like I just woke up I did for a long long period of my life I wasn't a Christian in fact I even used to like talk down on the whole thing

I used to think that it was kind of a bit stupid you know I was like well just trying to argue with science and some uneducated beliefs and it was hard for me to believe the idea of God it was hard for me to believe the idea of Jesus therefore when I went to church as a kid I used to just sleep uh I used to be bad I used to not want to go I used to be crying and throwing a fit that I had to go and it really just was one of those

things that I hated so I really was never somebody that believed in God I never even cared about it and funny enough I became somewhat successful without having a relationship with God I think at the age of like 19 20 I had my first couple hundred, from the internet um I was in good shape I was about to move to Los Angeles and live in my dream apartment at the time and I had no relationship with God so I thought that I didn't need that and I thought that I had the power um I thought

that if I could go that far without God then what's the point of having a relationship with God now and funny enough I was living this life for about a year doing very bad stuff bad bad bad bad bad stuff uh you know we were getting drunk every weekend I was smoking weed pretty much every day spending money on stupid stuff not taking care of my family the way I take care of them now just living for me I was living like I was only living for me and this caught up to me pretty quickly

my business Came Crashing Down my finances Came Crashing Down shortly after and it wasn't long until I was worth nothing like less than nothing I had $30,000 in debt I had to leave Los Angeles I had to move back to my mom's house I went from being on top of my little world to back to zero again and this funny enough was one of the first times that I ever started to tap back into my relationship with God there was times when I was in Los Angeles where maybe I went to church but I was

just doing it because I wanted to go there with my friend or maybe cuz I wanted to write my wrong on what I did on a weekend but I never really like took it seriously never felt like it was my choice once I had to leave Los Angeles and move back to my mom's house that was one of the first times that I ever prayed and it's funny because why didn't I pray when I was up why wasn't I giving God thanks for the success that I had why did I only come crying to God

when things came crashing down in my life anyways that's what I did and I was at my mom's house I was broke as a joke I was addicted to drugs I was less of a man I felt like less of a man than I had ever been in my life and all I had left was to go to God and I started praying to God and the thing that I prayed for was forgiveness not only did I pray to have God forgive me but I prayed to be able to forgive myself because I felt like

at that stage of my life I just had so much resentment and angst towards myself and that was the thing that was blocking me from moving forward and it didn't take long actually for me to reach a point in which I felt as if I was forgiven I can't really explain it outside of more than that it was like almost a shift in my mind that I was forgiven for the mistakes that I had made in my past and my people still loved me and God still loved me and I had another shot at this

thing looking back on it now I realized that was God forgiving me that was the whole ethos of Christianity itself is that if you write some wrongs if you do some wrongs you can be forgiven and you could be made new again still back then I didn't have that understanding like I do now so I just thought okay well you forgave yourself so now you're good keep on pushing and sure enough it worked um it was only a year after that that I was back up over a million dollars I bought my mom her dream

truck I I had I had myself on My Feet Again I had a big Investment Portfolio I was living in Miami with my friends like I was super healthy super good shape but still I had nothing to give to God I was not praying I was not giving thanks he saved me from my lowest moment of my life I begged him when I was at zero to save me and then when I made it up again I didn't thank him maybe a little bit here and there but it was never genuine thanks I didn't do

what I needed to do to show the right things and again things came crashing down for me you know I didn't go broke again but I got addicted to drugs again I started smoking every single day um I lost my father I lost a relationship with my brother who was like my best friend and back to zero again mentally and emotionally back to zero so what I'm trying to say is that every time I get to the top and I don't give thanks to the Lord seems like he's testing me uh it reminds me of

the Book of Job I just started reading the Bible a little bit more I'm not very well versed on the Bible so don't expect me to start kicking verses yet but the Book of Job is a story about this man he's super successful he owns a big farm he's got all the sheeps he's got I think like 10 children or more than 10 children and one day everything goes he loses it all God takes it all away from takes away his farm takes away his house actually doesn't take it away Burns it down and and

all of his children they were in the house oh yeah the house burned down and all the kids died too God took away everything from this man to test his faith and in the time which he lost everything at first he was still showing strong faith to God but then after a while he started to resent God he started to speak on God poorly and he got nothing in return he just kept getting nothing and living in a rough life but then after a certain point he finally said okay he a lot of his friends

and his friends were trying to convince him why God might have did this or whatever at a certain point he really started to get stronger in his faith and he started to become a better Christian and sure enough God gave him everything he had but double and when I heard this story of Job it really reminded me of my life I mean job had it way rougher than me but I had some success and God took everything away from me and I showed God that I wanted to know him and he gave it back to

me 10 times more and that brings me to today I'm in a position now where I'm more affluent than ever I have amazing friends amazing connections I have all material success but I still feel like something's missing and this time I don't want to make the same mistake that I made in the past this time I don't want to go without giving thanks and this time I really want to know God I Think Jesus is the answer to filling this maybe emptiness that I have in my heart because to me it seems to be the

final frontier I mean you can achieve all the material success in the world but it's not going to fulfill you in the way that you think it is it's not that oh if I know Jesus then I don't need to do anything anymore and I could just know Jesus and that's it but I mean maybe it is I don't know but I'm still going to keep doing everything that I'm doing but I want to be a better Christian and I do want to know Jesus and I just wanted to share that with you guys who

might be you know a bit like wishy-washy in your faith I got far without Jesus but I know if I want to go further I need him if I want to go further and actually enjoy life and Find meaning in life I need to know Jesus and that's the journey that I'm embarking on now I can't promise I'm going to be you know a perfect Christian and stuff like that I'm I I'm I'm really sometimes scared even about putting this message out there but it's just something that I felt called to do especially after the

overwhelming response that I got on the last video um cuz after after okay after I got this last video talking about me being depressed I went to the comment section and everybody was telling me to go read the Bible so okay obviously I'm not going to go read the whole Bible but everybody well not right now but everybody told me to go read Ecclesiastes and Proverbs and job I read all three of these books and I come to realize that I and and in my life I'm 26 now I've read maybe 200 300 books like

on like self-help and business and relationships and psychology the Bible has the best wisdom of all the books in fact all the books that I've read almost seem to be a regurgitated version of what the Bible is trying to say um just in their own worldly view it's exciting that I'm making this realization at this stage of my life I wish I made it earlier and maybe if I made it earlier I wouldn't have even had to go through losing everything or perhaps this is exactly how God planned it