In this coaching session that happened during one of our live Q&As, we meet a man who's procrastinating so much that he's having a hard time getting his side hustle off the ground. And during the video, we discover the thing that's really holding him back and how that procrastination can completely dissolve. So my question for you, yeah, I procrastinate a lot.

Uhhuh. And my question is, how do I get to the root of that procrastination? Um, what do you you procrastinate a lot on what?

Because there's there's you don't procrastinate on. For instance, you procrastinate on this call, putting your shirt on in the morning. Yeah.

Like, so what is it that you procrastinate on? Um, work stuff. So, I haveve I've got I've got some clients again.

So, not all your work stuff do you procrastinate on? No. No.

So, what's the what's the stuff that you procrastinate on in work? Or you could call it, let's just say side hustle, side project, which is something of my own. Uhhuh.

Okay. It's looked like that for for a many years. So it's the confluence of something that takes care of yourself and money where you procrastinate.

Yes. Taking care of somebody else and money, do you procrastinate? Could you say that again?

If you're taking care of somebody else and earning money, do you procrastinate? uh i. e.

my my children. Um no, I do what I need to do for sure. So the only place you're procrastinating is where money and taking care of yourself happens.

Yes. Is that is that accurate? Okay.

Gotcha. Okay. So what makes you not want to take care of yourself?

Well, I mean I take care of myself well physically. Yeah. What makes you want to not take care of yourself financially?

I think I oscillate between fear of success and failure. Gotcha. The the fear of success is that I'll become overwhelmed.

Yeah. And I'll be unable to How overwhelmed are you with the procrastination? Um, considerably so.

Okay. So, it's not overwhelm you're scared of. You're doing it to yourself all the time.

How do you mean? Well, you're procrastinating all the time. That's overwhelming.

Yeah, that is. So, you don't have any you don't have any fear of overwhelm. That's happening all the time.

It does happen all the time. Yeah. So, what's the real fear?

That that it'll um that I won't be able to handle it. ultimately it'll fail. So I think that the fear of success is ultimately the fear of failure because it'll go up and then well hopefully so that means when you're doing this stuff so when you're working for somebody else none of that shit's going through your head.

When you're working for yourself all that shit's going through your head. So when you're doing your work for yourself give me a project that you're procrastinating on. Um I've got a I've got a I've got a website I'm I'm building out just a niche website.

Okay, great. So, you're building out this website and when you're doing it, how does it feel different in your body than when you're building a website out for your kid or for or doing that kind of doing work for someone else? Yeah.

Well, if if it was for my kid, for example, um there'd be a lightness about it. There would just wouldn't be any pressure. Great.

So, basically, what you're saying is you do not want you procrastinate on things that feel like Yeah. Yeah. Because I put I put so much importance and pressure on me, you know, that being the thing that uh it's that or nothing, you know.

Yeah. It defines you. Like I'm gripping on Yeah.

Right. So, right. If every time you played the guitar Yeah.

you were like, "I got to do this perfect. " You would not play guitar. Um, no.

I mean, yeah. I mean, if every time you doom scrolled and you were like, I've got to like do my finger perfectly on that scroll, you would stop doom scrolling. Yeah.

Right. Well, the the perfectionism is is also at play here. Yeah.

It also makes for a shitty website. Great websites connect. They're not perfect.

Yeah. It's it's it's the kind of perfection where I'm not doing everything, you know, redoing it and redoing it. It's the kind that stops me from starting.

It's that kind of perfectionism. That's right. That's right.

Because as soon as you engage, it feels like Yeah. And what happens is I I I run into this um I have a really low threshold for frustration and it feels like if I'm taking a step forward then something Yeah. will get in my way and that my tolerance for that is Yeah.

You almost rage. Yeah. You're going to get in the way.

You're in the way. Yeah. Yeah.

You're not like, "How do I have fun building a website? " You're like, "How do I make a perfect website? " Yeah, I am in the way cuz it's all too much.

Let's just say for a second you were like, "Hey, I'm going to have fun building a website for myself. " The only requirement, it doesn't matter how good it is. The only requirement is that I have fun.

Yeah, there's there's a lot more energy in that, you know? There's there's way less friction. And it's like, well, and what's the qual what's the quality of the website going to be compared to if you try to do a perfect assuming you got it done, which I'm not going to assume is true, but you got it done going this has to be a perfect website and you got it done saying I'm going to have fun doing this website.

What would be the difference in quality of the websites? I'd imagine that the one that's fun will be of of higher quality. Okay.

But let's assume that it isn't. Let's assume that it's shitty quality compared to the perfect one. Yeah.

And then you're like, you know what? I'm going to have fun redoing my website, improving my website. Then eventually you'll you'll get the website.

Yeah. It'll it'll it'll get done. Yeah.

It'll get done. Yeah. Yeah.

I'll go a lot I'll go a lot further when it's fun. That's right. And the only thing making it not fun is that you somehow think it's important.

Yeah, that's that's right. It's like it's it's the it's the world saving keep me off the streets kind of. Great.

Now I'm going to make you really uncomfortable. Okay. Yeah.

Prove to all of us that it's important. Your website that it's important. Yeah.

It's so important that it's not fun and you don't do it. So prove to us why it's so important. Because if I if I don't do it, then I will be working for somebody else and that I don't want to do that anymore and I'll I'll my my income will be limited and I won't get to where I want to be and I won't be able to give my kids the lifestyle that I want them to have.

and be the dad that I want to be. I'll be stuck. You are stuck.

I know. Yeah. Uh for a long time.

Yeah. It's so important that it makes you stuck. Yeah, I think that that you know beneath that is the fear that I'll um Which would you rather just curious which would you rather to work for somebody else or to constantly be under the yoke of a perfectionist?

Cuz that's your choice right now. And I see which one you're making. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. I see that.

You want to work for yourself, you got to be a good boss. Yeah. I got to take the pressure off myself.

That That is a way to put pressure on yourself. I've got to take the pressure off myself. Yeah.

Yeah. That's pressure, isn't it? That's more pressure.

Yeah. So, how do I Could you imagine how horrible I'd be at what I'm doing right now if I needed to get a result? Yeah.

Yeah. Probably wouldn't be sat here still. Yeah.

I would I would I would hate my job. Yeah. Right.

Would you know how bad this session would be if you needed to be perfect? Yeah, it'd be pretty awful. Be pretty awful.

So, how do you just enjoy like right now? How do you enjoy this moment 10% more? This moment right now.

This moment right now. Yeah, that looks like you did it. I just appreciate that I'm here.

Yeah. On a call with you and all these these people. Yeah.

That's how you enjoy your work more, too. All right. That's it.

That's it. That's it. Okay.

So what I want you to do is for the next week I want you to sit down in front of your computer with the intention to work and enjoy yourself. And the most important thing is to enjoy yourself. The second most important thing is to work.

Fantastic. Thank you. So it's just oh if I'm not enjoying myself stop what I'm doing.

Figure out a way to do it in a way that I enjoy it. Yeah. Make your work something that is lovely for you to do and you won't procrastinate.

Yeah, I like that. Lovely for me to do. Yeah.

Yeah. All right. Thank you so much.

Good to be with you.