when you think of abuse what comes to mind physical abuse is usually the first thought but not all abuse is physical mental abuse is a form of manipulation and control intended to undermine one's self-esteem and make them feel isolated take Cinderella as an example of a victim of mental abuse isolated by her stepsisters and stepmother and forced to do their bidding Cinderella found no hope even within her own family the most difficult part about mental abuse is that it can go on for a long period of time because of the lack of physical indications intervention
is much less likely to occur according to Sher Stein's Sid emotional abuse goes undetected minimized and dismissed by the abuser victims and others not only this but mentally abused people are likely to put themselves in additional abusive situations according to counselor Andrea Matthews those exposed to mental abuse in their childhood May accept abusive Behavior as something normal and be prone to entering abusive relationships without even realizing that the abuse they endure is very wrong knowing whether you a victim of mental abuse is the first step to helping yourself identify the people around you in your
past or in the present who might be your abusers this is especially important as mental abuse can take a toll on one's mental and physical health so with that here are five signs that you've been mentally abused and don't know it number one empathy error in 2017 a group of researchers from the University of Berlin found that early life stress such as emotional neglect and mental abuse can cause genetic changes to the hippocampus which can make it more difficult to empathize with others emotions since the hippocampus is involved with unconscious processing of relational information it
is a central structure for emotional empathy experiences let's say a friend is really upset because their pet has just passed if your hippocampus is fully operational you may say something like oh I'm so sorry I can't even imagine how you feel you're letting your friend know you understand how they feel and you're there for them if you're a victim of mental abuse you may say something nice because you know you should or make an inappropriate comment or might not say anything at all now if you've never experienced a pet passing away you may not be
able to relate and that's okay but if you find it hard to empathize with someone's feelings this could be a sign of past mental abuse number two low self-esteem do you find it hard to boost your self-confidence and always doubt yourself if you've been subject to mental abuse you have consistently been put down which contributed to a negative self-image a study on self-esteem in adolescence by researchers from the Hubert kyuki Memorial University found that psychological maltreatment and self-esteem are negatively correlated the study also found that victims of mental abuse tend to believe that they have
little or no value you to those around them or even the world they may also think that the world is unsafe and believe many others will abuse them as well if you're someone who usually thinks lower of yourself think back do you have someone around that constantly puts you down you may be a victim of mental abuse number three yes to all when someone cares about you in any capacity they don't want to see you upset or controlled according to psychologist J Reed self absorbed caregivers may be a root of why one might need to
please others the mental abuse they give might make you believe that others needs come before your own they want you to believe you're lesser than so you're always trying to do more to gain their approval do you find yourself needing to be perfect for others in every way to be accepted and loved let's say there's one cookie left in the pack your mental abuser comes in and says you going to eat that you could say no so they can eat it and this could make them happy which means they may not say something mean to
you if you say yes you might be called inconsiderate or rude that urge to please others can be another sign of mental abuse number four self-doubt when you say or do something how confident are you that you're correct we can't be right all the time but mental abuse can cause you to question your sanity and sense of reality we know this as gaslighting according to Andrea Matthews LPC NCC gaslighting is a main form of control for abusers because it can deflect blame and cause one to believe that they are at fault if you've been frequently
gaslit in the past you might have low confidence in your abilities and subject yourself to a lot of self-doubt you might also not trust yourself or your instincts as a result of being in a mentally abusive situation and number five fatigue do you find yourself feeling exhausted on almost all the time I don't mean tired like I need a cup of coffee to wake me up I mean actual fatigue where if you lie down you would actually pass out while one might not expect that mental abuse can affect and drain someone physically it certainly can
a study from KU Loven in 2001 found a correlation between people who have experienced childhood emotional abuse and neglect and having chronic fatigue syndrome or fibromyalgia during adulthood mental abuse they found may increase inre vulnerability to chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia due to altered pain perception and the burden of an overactive lifestyle that has to regulate inner tension and compensate for low self-esteem if you have chronic fatigue or pain and have been seen by a medical professional there is a possibility that you've been mentally abused mental abusers may not leave a scar a bruise or
a physical marker that they've done damage this is why it can be so difficult to identify and handle mental abuse until it's serious these aren't the only effects of mental abuse but they are some of the more common ones when exposed to mental abuse for long periods of time if you know of any other signs of mental abuse that we didn't mention let us know in the comments as always we recommend reaching out to a mental health professional if you've experienced abuse in any form see you next time
