So, this may be the worst, most evil pastor I've ever seen. Let's just call him Pastor Tim. Pastor Tim has a problem: he keeps getting fired.
He keeps losing his job at church after church because he's constantly involved in some scandal. Like, he gets fired from one church because they catch him leaving a strip club one night. "Hey, isn't that our preacher?
" He gets fired from another church because they catch him having an affair with one of the members of his congregation. Bro is just a menace. But eventually, he can't be a pastor anymore, so he has to get a regular job working at a county jail in Minnesota.
And, of course, that goes horribly wrong too because one time there's this prostitute leaving the jail, and Pastor Tim starts creeping on her. He offers her a ride home, and on that ride home, he then proceeds to assault her. Later, she presses charges against him, and so bam!
Police arrest Pastor Tim, and they sentence him to six months in jail. Wow, that's a really light sentence. Okay, but here's the other thing about Pastor Tim, though: he actually has a wife and daughters.
His wife's name is Janet, and Janet learns about what her husband did to the prostitute. She's like [ __ ], all this, and she leaves him. She takes her daughters and moves from Minnesota all the way to Alabama.
Months later, Pastor Tim actually gets out of jail and moves straight from Minnesota down to Alabama to be closer to Janet and his daughters. Somehow, he convinces Janet that he is a changed man, and unfortunately, Janet takes him back. So, there in Alabama, Tim gets a job at a local Pentecostal church as a pastor.
Now, he obviously doesn't tell them that he's been fired from a bunch of other churches or that he just got out of jail for assaulting a prostitute, because then they’d never hire him. No, no. Instead, he lies on his resume like the rest of us, and Pastor Tim gets this job.
He starts preaching at this church every week, and the people at the church love him. They're like, "Oh, he's so Christlike! " But unfortunately, Pastor Tim is not, in fact, Christlike, because at some point during all this, he starts chatting with a woman online.
Her name's Molly, and even though they haven't met in person, Molly thinks Pastor Tim is fine. They keep chatting, hitting it off, and flirting, and over time, they develop a pretty serious relationship. Of course, Pastor Tim doesn't tell her who he really is.
He gives her a fake name and doesn't tell her that he's married; he tells her that he's a Navy SEAL or some [ __ ]. For the record, he is not, in fact, a Navy SEAL. Anyway, at some point, Pastor Tim starts telling his wife, Janet, that he has to go out of town on official church business, but of course, there is no official church business.
He's just using that as an excuse to sneak away and meet up with Molly. That's when he flies from Alabama over to Washington State and starts having an affair with Molly on the side. This affair with Molly continues, and over time, things get more and more serious between the two.
Pastor Tim ends up leading this double life. He's spending part-time in Alabama with his wife, Janet, and part-time in Washington with Molly. This seems to be working pretty well for him, I guess, until eventually, Pastor Tim has been cheating on his wife, Janet, with Molly for over a decade.
That's when he decides to propose to Molly, even though he's still married to Janet. Of course, she has no idea he's been sneaking off to see this other woman the whole time. So, after the proposal, Tim heads back to Alabama and keeps pretending to be a good husband and a good pastor.
But unfortunately, Pastor Tim can't keep up with this lie. He comes up with an idea to get rid of his wife, Janet, for good. At the Pentecostal church where Pastor Tim preaches, they have a charity event sometimes, and during this charity event, they all shoot pew-pews for some reason.
Welcome to America! One of the times the church holds one of these events, once the event is over, Pastor Tim takes three of the rifles they're using home with him. When he and Janet get home, Pastor Tim asks her to help him carry the rifles into their house.
He hands her one, then takes the other two and follows her through the front door and into their bedroom. As Tim walks through the doorway, he lifts up one of the rifles, aims it at Janet's back, and pulls the trigger. Blang!
She falls to the ground. Their daughters are home, so they come in and start screaming; it's this whole horrible scene. Unfortunately, Janet doesn't survive the shot.
Later, police get there and ask Pastor Tim what happened. I guess he tells them, "Oh, it was all an accident! The pew-pew accidentally knocked against something, and it just suddenly went off.
" I guess police believe him and rule the whole thing an accident. This is a horrible situation, and everyone is devastated. They're trying to figure out exactly what happened.
How did this rifle accidentally go off? One woman who really wants to know the truth is Janet's sister, and Janet's sister hears that Pastor Tim accidentally shot Janet, and. .
. She gets suspicious. She always thought Pastor Tim was kind of a shady dude, so Janet's sister sends an email to the local District Attorney and boom!
The District Attorney gets a detective on the case. Now, the detective starts investigating, and he finds out almost immediately that Pastor Tim has two driver's licenses for some reason: one with his real name on it and one with a completely different last name on it, like he has two identities. The detective keeps digging, and he checks Pastor Tim's phone records.
He sees all these late-night phone calls to a number in Washington State, so he tracks the phone number back to a woman—a woman named Molly. Around the same time, Janet's sister is still trying to figure out this case too. She hits up the detective and tells him about this rumor she had heard: that Pastor Tim may have had a girlfriend on the side, a girlfriend named Molly.
So, kapow! Everything starts clicking into place for the detective. He feels like he knows the truth: that Pastor Tim unalived Janet so that he could be with his side girlfriend, Molly.
But unfortunately, there's not enough evidence to charge Pastor Tim with murder. Then, one day, Pastor Tim goes and does something really stupid. Three months after Janet had died, Pastor Tim forges Janet's name and takes out a loan for $5,000 in her name.
Of course, this gets flagged as suspicious because dead people can't apply for loans. The detective is able to use this information to bring Pastor Tim in and question him about this mysterious loan. While he's interviewing him about this forgery, he starts asking him about the murder.
He keeps pressing him on it, and Pastor Tim is all nervous and angry. He keeps changing his story about exactly how it went down and how the pew pew went off. Around the same time, some other officers working on the case track down Molly.
They tell her who Pastor Tim really is—that he's not, in fact, a Navy SEAL but a pastor living in Alabama who they suspect unalived his own wife. They tell her he's been using a fake name and a fake ID to fool her about who he is. That's why he has two driver's licenses.
Molly is like, "Oh snap! " and she gets pissed. She flips on him real quick and starts handing over emails and correspondence with him, saying, "I'll give you whatever information you need.
" Anyway, eventually, police do gather enough evidence against him, and so bam! They arrest him. Here's his mug shot.
Ultimately, Pastor Tim goes to trial twice, and he's found guilty of unaliving his wife. He's sentenced to life in prison. Good.
