Is it Shyness or Social anxiety? QUIZ

i'll go to the left to the left to the left to the right to the right to the front to the front to the back and the back now bit baby okay we ready hey everybody today i'm gonna explain the difference between being shy and struggling with social anxiety because it can be hard to know the difference and to be honest they share a lot of the same symptoms first let's dig into what social anxiety or otherwise known as social phobia is and i'm going to start by reading some of the criteria from the diagnostic

and statistical manual of mental disorders otherwise known as the dsm in order to be diagnosed with social anxiety we have to have a marked fear or anxiety about one or more social situations in which the individual is exposed to possible scrutiny by others like this could be meeting new people giving a speech or having someone watch you do something like eat or work on something and we also have to fear that we will act in a way or show anxiety symptoms that will be negatively evaluated like we'll be embarrassed or rejected by others because of

how we act social situations almost always provoke fear or anxiety and therefore we avoid them or endure them with intense fear and anxiety now this fear or anxiety we feel is out of proportion to the actual threat that's posed by the social situation and these feelings are persistent meaning they have to last for six months or more sean and i have a friend who has crippling social anxiety and has prevented him from coming on trips with us being part of important events in our life and it has made it really difficult for him to meet

people and make new friends and i've talked to him about it over the years and he's told me that he remembers being anxious as a child feeling so overcome with fear and worry during school that he would like sweat through his t-shirts and it got to the point where he would bring a bunch of extra shirts to school keep them in his locker so he could change them as needed and his social anxiety made speaking in class or giving a presentation impossible and he received many zeros because of it and it wasn't until he was

in his i think early 20s or so that he realized what he had was social anxiety and even then it's taken him a lot of time to find a therapist that he can afford and that he likes and a medication that works social anxiety has affected almost every part of his life and impaired his ability to do what he needs to do but just like any other mental illness everyone's experience is going to be different i just want to offer you an example to help you better see what living with social anxiety can be like

when we have social anxiety we avoid any and all social situations because the fear and anxiety as well as the worry that we're going to do something embarrassing is so unbearable it's just easier on us to not be around people at all and we can also have anticipatory anxiety leading up to a social event where we have to practice and practice our speech beforehand or we worry about an upcoming event days or maybe even weeks in advance my mom does that sometimes and we can even become so worried or anxious that we can feel sick

or our mind can go blank and we can sweat and some people even tremble and yes we can become so anxious or overwhelmed that we have a panic attack but if our anxiety always leads to a panic attack we may be suffering from panic disorder not social anxiety just important to remember moving on to shyness when we are shy it's part of who we are meaning it's a personality trait that we have and most people who are shy don't see it as a negative thing those of us who are shy can live a full life

we do what we want and get along just fine we just tend to be more quiet and reserved until we know you better and we can be a bit standoffish and prefer to spend time with people that we already know well and we can even feel a little anxious about meeting new people or going to do new things however and here's the real distinction shyness is okay and manageable shyness is okay and manageable like i said we can live our life just fine people with social anxiety aren't able to social anxiety impairs our ability to

function making it difficult if not impossible for us to do what we need to do at work or school or in our social lives let me share an example i always remember this girl emily that i went to school with from kindergarten all the way through high school and how incredibly shy she was she was super super blonde like white hair and so she would turn beat red when she was called on in class and couldn't stop blushing when giving a speech or presentation it would just like build and she even told me how much

she hated attention like if everybody turned towards her she hated feeling like everyone was watching her she preferred to just kind of quietly do her work and loved playing the trumpet in our school marching band and she did have a small group of really close friends that she hung out with a lot i was kind of like a peripheral friend but i knew her forever so we rode the same bus all that stuff but anyways throughout our years in school together we got to know each other pretty well and emily was really funny super quick

witted and when it was just the two of us chatting and hanging out she was totally fine but if more people were around you know she'd prefer to kind of slink into the background or she wouldn't speak up or share her thoughts as much so you could say did emily feel anxious around new people sure she did did she feel so anxious that she couldn't get her schoolwork done or participate in school activities nope emily was shy she still did what she enjoyed doing she had friends she engaged in extracurricular activities and all that to

say that shyness isn't debilitating uncomfortable sure but we are still able to do the things that we need and want to do that's the important distinction there also not all people with social anxiety are shy meaning that their fear of social situations is not part of who they are it's a mental illness that's holding them back from doing the things that they love and once they overcome the symptoms they could be an extrovert love being the life of the party or the center of attention people who are shy don't like those things they would prefer

to not be at a big party or have everyone paying attention to them it's not who they are their shyness isn't holding them back from doing the things that they love they love spending time with one or two close friends at a time and not getting too much attention how do we know if we're experiencing shyness or social anxiety here are a few quick questions to hopefully clear it up for you number one does your anxiety or fear about seeing other people keep you from doing the things that you love number two do you feel

your anxiety or shyness makes it hard for you to do what you need to do to succeed in life number three does your fear or anxiety feel so overwhelming that you sometimes have panic attacks and number four have you ever had to call in sick to school or work because of your anxiety if you answered yes to these questions it's most likely what you're struggling with is social anxiety disorder if none of that rang true for you then it's possible that you're shy overall know that if your anxiety or fear about social situations is getting

in the way of you doing what you love or getting that job or promotion that you know you deserve please speak up and reach out for professional help cognitive behavioral therapy or cbt is incredibly effective at treating social anxiety and by finding a therapist that you like who helps push you to fight back against those worry thoughts you can overcome it there's also medication too if you feel like you're drowning in those symptoms and need some extra support and feel free to share what's helped you overcome your social anxiety in those comments down below and

feel free to share this video you never know who will help have a wonderful week thank you so much for watching and i will see you next time bye i'm on the move socials i don't know why that's such a hard word