The Real Reason Winter & the Holidays Wreck Your Mental Health

The winter months and the holiday season in general tends to be a pretty brutal time of year on people's mental health. At least if you live in the United States where in many states it gets really really cold and really really dark this time of year. And when you combine that with the financial pressure and the social pressure that come with things like Thanksgiving and Christmas, plus sometimes you got like insurance changes and resetting deductibles and the pressure to create uh New Year's resolutions that go along with the first of the year.

we just get hammered with like so many maladaptive situations all at once that this tends to be a time of year when people's mental health does just kind of do a nose dive. And so every year around this time, I try to make sort of like a holiday survival guide to create some content to help some people remember or learn some strategies or even philosophies to some degree to navigate this season of life. Most people's pressure and stress around this time of the year tends to come from one of three problems, and they're not mutually exclusive.

You might have all three of these going on to some degree. One problem is too many people. As I said, this is a time of year when you might spend a lot more time with family or or other groups of people who you don't see as much throughout the year.

You might be kind of forced into close proximity with them, much more so than you're used to. And there can be a lot of stress and drama and challenges that come with that. On the other end of the continuum, sometimes the pressure we feel around this time of year socially is too few people.

Maybe we see everyone else at their big exciting family gatherings and maybe we just don't really have anybody in our life right now. Or maybe we have lost somebody recently and we feel their absence much more strongly around the holiday season. This tends to be a big grief trigger time of year for people.

And the third are just the general stressors that come with the holiday season and the winter conditions. So, in today's piece of content, I'm going to review a few strategies for each of those three circumstances, as well as a couple universal holiday and winter survival strategies for your mental health to hopefully have you come out the other side of this thing with your sanity mostly intact. First, I want to review a couple universal mental health principles for this time of year.

Doesn't matter what your situation is. Doesn't matter what your circumstances are. These are strategies that will serve you well.

The first is remember that you aren't the only one who struggles this time of year. And I don't mean that in a shameful way like, oh, it's not just you. I mean like you're not alone.

And that's important to remember because if you get on social media or watch almost any TV show or TV channel around this time of year, we are just bombarded with the idea that this is a warm, safe, happy time where families get together and eat good food and enjoy one another's presents and smile and laugh and cuddle. And that's just not the reality for many people, maybe even most people. Um, I can tell you here at the Northstar Psychological Center, the mental health private practice that I own, this is our busiest time of year.

Like our referrals go up, like November through January, we're up like 10 to 20%. Every year, year after year, because this is a hard time of year for many, many people. Again, we got the family stress, we got shorter days, it's cold, money's tight, there's just so much going on here.

And so if you kind of dread this time of year every year and you don't get in the quote, you know, holiday spirit or Christmas spirit, please don't think that's just you. Please don't think you're just being, you know, a miserable person or that this is like yet another example of how you don't fit in with society and how you're so different and how you don't belong here. That's actually really normal.

That actually is a sign that you're maybe a fairly normal person after all. But it's so easy to feel like you're the only one not having a good time. So please don't let yourself get tricked into think that's true, cuz it's not.

and it won't do you any favors if you think that way. The second universal strategy, no matter who you are, what your circumstances are that I want you to consider kind of maintaining through this season is stick to your plan with regards to your bio- rhythms. And so what I mean by that is like making sure you're staying on top of your sleep hygiene, making sure your nutrition stays relatively consistent, still trying to get your physical activity in, and avoiding excess.

You know, typically that's excess food, could be excess alcohol. This tends to be a period of of of year that's really based on overconumption and overconumption is not a super helpful thing for our mental health. So the the core to this and there can be a lot of pressure to like do certain things differently around the holidays, but the core for this to me is remember that your body does not exist to please other people.

And so changing what you do with your body to make other people happy isn't actually the proper use of it. Um, food is a big place where this comes into play because you're probably, well, depending on your situation, many people are going to be eating in a much more public manner around the holidays than what they typically do, which means there's going to be more people potentially commenting on your eating. And this one can go either way.

In most families, there is a lot of pressure around the holidays to eat a lot of food. This is one of the few times of year when it is actually culturally normal to binge eat. So, if you look at the the definition, it's not a it's not a 100% objective definition of what a binge eating episode is.

Um, like it's not based on calories or anything like that, but if we're being real, like most people binge on Thanksgiving and on Christmas. The amount of food that it is culturally normal to consume during those times is kind of crazy. Some families though might go the opposite route where they might give you a lot of grief or guilt or shame around like if you eat more than them, if you eat, you know, quote, too much in their eyes, then they're going to have something to say about it to you.

Eat what feels right to you and eat in a way that is supportive of your physical and mental health. Your food intake is not a vehicle you should be using to please other people or manage other people's stress because it is your job to manage what goes into your body and that should be based on what you as an individual need to feel good and to be healthy. I really, really, really want to caution you around overindulging on alcohol.

Alcohol consumption goes way up this time of year, too. And again, I think that can be there can be a lot of factors for that. There can again be some family uh you know, stress or pressure to do that because other people are doing it.

Boredom can certainly be a factor. We're often it depends a little bit on where you live, but we're often stuck inside more. I could go on and on about the reasons, but the point is overconumption of alcohol is not going to do your mental health any favors.

You know, you know this, but it's still it people need to be reminded more than they need to be taught in many cases. You might feel a little better for a few hours, but then your energy level, your cognitive function, your sleep, it's going to be screwed up for two or three days from even a small amount of alcohol consumption. You don't need anything working against you this time of year.

This is not a time of year when we should increase our alcohol consumption. If anything, we should decrease it. Sleep is another one.

Do not screw up your sleep cycle just because you're busy. I know that there might be days where you have like two or three different family gatherings to go to potentially in some cases. Um, you know, daylight savings time, the the weather is weird, the lighting situation is weird, don't mess with your sleep schedule.

And and also, if you have a lot of time off from work or school, try to avoid sleeping in, too. I know it's tempting, but when your sleep cycle gets out of whack, your sleep efficiency decreases, and you actually need quantitatively in terms of like hours, you need more sleep to get the same amount of rest. and you're eventually going to have to go back to work, back to school, back to whatever, you know, you're taking time off from around the holidays and then your system's just not going to be prepared for it and it's not going to be good for you.

So, try to stick to your same normal, you know, like Monday through Friday 9 to5 sleep schedule even during the holidays, even if you don't have to because otherwise you're going to have to reestablish that routine and try to keep getting your movement in. Uh, again, if you're like an outside person, if you like to go for jog in the morning and stuff, I know when it's snowy, icy, brutally cold, whatever, it's hard to do that. It's okay to switch the format.

It's okay if your exercise becomes indoors for a while. But this is also a time of year where people get really, really sedentary and that does not do our mental health any favors. If you can find an outdoor winter activity that you enjoy, skiing, snow tubing, snowboarding, hiking, even just ice fishing for that matter.

If you can find one thing around this time of year that you look forward to, that can do wonders for your mental health. So, those are my two general strategies that probably apply to just about anybody. Next category I want to get into is what if you have to deal with too many people around the holidays?

What if you are overwhelmed with family and social obligations? And if that's the situation you're in, I've got a few strategies for you. The first is I want you to be mindful of your psychosocial boundaries, specifically screening and containment.

So screening refers to how much you let in, you know, the thoughts, feelings, ideas of other people. And containment is just the opposite of screening. So containment is how much of my versions of those things do I let out?

How much do I tell people what I'm thinking or what I'm feeling? And stereotypically with families, we are air quotes supposed to be able to do a lot of that with them. But that's not the reality of many of the families that we have.

You might see and hear some very hurtful or unhelpful or disgusting things and and you might also be tempted to call those things out and engage in arguments with people and that sometimes that's worth doing and sometimes it's not. A general strategy that I try to apply with my psychosocial boundaries around the holiday season is I try to treat the unhelpful, you know, words, ideas, and values of other people as being similar to like an ugly Christmas sweater because you pro maybe you have that one relative who always wears this weird ugly Christmas sweater. I can't not see it.

Like it is there. It is in my field of vision. I cannot remove the fact that I have awareness of it, but I don't have to wear it.

So other people can say what they want to say. They can do what they want to do. They can feel what they want to feel.

And and you can be aware of that with your brain and you can hear those words with your ears, but you don't actually have to let them into your emotional space. You don't have to let them become your problem. You can visualize a boundary around you.

It can be a hamster ball. It can be the force. It can be a big bubble.

Whatever. And other people's stuff, their experiences, their words, their values, their perspectives, they sit outside this bubble. You still are aware of their existence.

You still perceive them, but they do not belong to you and they do not enter your space and therefore do not become your problem. Now, boundaries is kind of a loaded term, I know, because a lot of people when they say boundaries, they're actually talking about trying to control other people. That's not a boundary.

Boundaries are not tools we use to control other people. You cannot control other people. You can't even control a baby.

You definitely can't control an adult. Boundaries are tools we use to control ourselves and the rules of engagement for us. So, if I go to a family gathering and I know there's someone there who has like I'm just going to make something up some religious or political beliefs that are very very very at odds with my own, I can't stop them from thinking those things or feeling those things.

And I can't even stop them from talking about those things. I can't stop myself from engaging. I don't have to participate in that conversation if I know it's not going to go anywhere helpful for me.

And if it gets too egregious, if it gets to the point where I cannot hold my tongue and I'm about to do something I'm going to regret, I don't have to be there. That can be a boundary, too. I won't be in a place where this happens.

But boundaries are not tools to control other people because you cannot control other people. You also cannot fix or change other people. So, don't take that on.

That is not your job at the holidays. That is not your job ever. And lastly, be mindful of topics that you engage in.

I know I kind of hinted at that already, but like don't martyr yourself. Don't get involved in a conversation that you know is just going to ruin your entire holidays. That's not going to do anybody any good.

Second strategy for dealing with too many people around the holidays is what I call practicing emotional budgeting. So a budget obviously is when you take something that you have a finite amount of and you determine how am I going to delineate this? How am I going to spend it?

Where am I going to put this this resource? Time and energy are two very very precious resources particularly this time of year and if you've got in-laws and and step families and who knows like some people have like five Christmases and it's easy to feel like you have to do all of them and stay for the whole thing for all of them and I'm here to remind you that no you do not that you have finite resources to distribute and you should be in charge of distributing those resources just like you have a finite amount of money to distribute ute and you really need to kind of decide before you get your money where you're going to spend it or you end up broke and unable to pay your bills. That's something I see metaphorically and literally for that matter, but that's a whole separate conversation happen to people around the holidays is they say, "I'm just going to do everything.

" And they get halfway through everything and they're like, "Oh my gosh, I just want to go home and cry and I still have like two more holidays to go to. " Consider how much time and energy you can afford and budget to your most important items first. Because what if what if the last holiday gathering is the one you are most looking forward to and most excited for, but by the time that one rolls around, you're so burnt out from everything that came before it that you don't even enjoy it or maybe you don't even go.

That's the importance of budgeting because overspending creates emotional burnout. The third, and this is going to sound a little silly at first, but bear with me. Pack a care bag.

So, if you're a parent or if you've, you know, been a parent to small kids, you know, when you go to places where they aren't at very often or places that are kind of unfamiliar, you bring a bag, right? You bring snacks for them, you bring drinks for them, you bring a few games or activities for them because you're not sure if what they need is going to be there. I'm not trying to infantilize you, but it's not a bad idea for an adult to pack a care bag.

I personally am a very picky eater and sometimes there are holiday gatherings where there just isn't food that I'm like gonna that's gonna work for me. I know how that makes me sound but whatever. You probably get it.

And I also know that if I go too long without eating, I become a miserable human being to be around and nobody wants that. So sometimes I will either bring like a couple snacks. I might bring a protein bar.

I might bring some trail mix, some jerky, or if I am if I'm contributing food to the holidays, I'll make sure I bring something that like I want to eat a lot of because that's a way I can make sure that my emotional resources are available for me to deal with whatever else happens. It can also be worth bringing things with you that that keep you present and engaged and entertained. Now, that one can be a little tricky cuz like I do believe one of the best ways to deal with family stress around the holidays is to have something that distracts you from whatever stress or frankly weirdness is happening around you enough to make it tolerable.

But you got to be careful with this because you don't want to like just bring something that completely pulls you away from participating in interaction. I know when I was a kid, you know, I used to bring like my Game Boy to the holidays, but then I get so into the game and I wouldn't talk to anybody. And that's not necessarily what we want for me.

me a good sweet spot is reading and particularly reading non-fiction. You know, like something fact-based, uh, something I can learn from, but something that doesn't have a big overarching plot or storyline that I'm going to lose myself in. Interestingly enough, we live in a time where it is generally considered less rude to be looking at your phone during a family gathering than to actually be like holding a book at a family gathering.

I don't know what that says about us. I just know that's something I've been observing at families. Um, and an app that I really like for situations like this is the sponsor of today's video, Short Form.

Short Form offers comprehensive summaries of best-selling non-fiction books so that you can easily understand the main points of the book with less expenditure of mental energy, which is perfect when you're trying to use something as like a skillful distraction where you're like, I'm interested in this enough that I can kind of deal with what's happening around me, but it's not pulling me in so much that I'm going to be unable to, you know, engage or participate with people. I think it makes it a perfect situation for dealing with holiday stressors. To me, it is like the sweet spot.

It is just the right amount of stimuli. Plus, short form has summaries of books on topics like communication, relationships, and stress management. So, maybe something comes up around the holidays, and you're like, "Oh my gosh, I need a tool right this very second to help me deal with this thing that just happened, but I'm not going to be able to read a 300page book right now about like how to deal with wacky family members and get the main points in time for it to make a difference in this current interaction.

" Um, so with short form, you might be able to pick up a skill or two that is directly related to something that is happening to you and put it to use immediately. I don't only use short form around the holidays. I also really like it when I need to learn a new skill or or like develop a new uh strategy in somewhat of a time crunch.

And as a relatively new business owner, that's something that's come up a lot for me this year. Um, I spent the first 40 years of my life pretty much avoiding being in any leadership positions ever for any reason. Um, and in the last couple, as a business owner, I am in a leadership position every single day, and that does not come naturally to me at all.

And so, at night, I've been reading summaries of books like The Dichotomy of Leadership by Jock Willing or Servant Leadership by Robert Greenleaf to try and develop skills I really wish I had learned earlier in life. If you'd like to check out Short Form, please use the link in my description for a $50 discount off their annual plan. Fourth technique to practice around dealing with too many people around the holidays.

And this one might be a little less popular than the three I said before it, so bear with me here. Is to practice grace and patience with people. Now, let me make this very clear.

You should not have to deal with abusive behavior around the holidays. Okay? No one should have to deal with with like verbally or physically unsafe people.

But at the same time, nobody is perfect. You do not always say the right thing either. You do not always do the right thing either.

I certainly do not. For whatever reason, I have a tendency, especially around the holidays, to get a blind spot and be like, "Everyone else is the problem. " Which is weird because normally I think I'm the problem.

I don't know why that inverts around the holidays. Maybe it's just that like the raw number of people around me. But I tend to become very like externally focused in in attributing blame to my problems.

And that's really not helpful because while well while there may be an external trigger um for the sources of distress that I experience is still an internal process and I need to manage that internally. I need to deal with my own stuff that comes up. So doing things like practicing breath work, I know that might be a little cliche like just take some deep breaths around the holiday, but keep in mind that if you slow and deepen your breath, it literally sends a message to your nervous system saying this is a stressful situation.

This is an unpleasant situation, but this is not an inherently dangerous situation. We are okay and we don't need to actually start like triggering a fight orflight response right now, which is going to be very counterproductive to having positive interactions with people around the holidays. Perspective taking can help a lot.

Like this person is saying something to me right now that I find really problematic or really inappropriate, but do I know something about them that might make it kind of make sense that they feel this way or that they think this way? Do I know something about the way they were raised or the era they were raised in where it's like how do I know if I wasn't in their circumstances that I wouldn't believe this thing too? Perspective taking can be really important especially when you got you know sometimes multiple generation generational differences or people that were raised in different states or even different countries like that stuff makes a big difference in what we think and what we believe.

Education level makes a difference. Um and really just like something I get so much value out of and it's so hard for me to do. I I have to work on it every single day of my life.

is pausing before reacting. I am such a reactive person. I want to just right away if I hear something I don't like, I want to just jump on it.

And often 10 seconds later, I'm like, why am I doing this? Why am I saying this? Why am I engaging at all?

Sometimes they're like, why am I engaging in this way? If I had just waited a few seconds to let my initial reaction calm down, I would have responded differently. So, I just try to wait the few seconds.

And sometimes that means the conversation has moved on. And you know what? Sometimes that's a win.

Sometimes that's exactly what you need. Last strategy for dealing with too many people is don't forget that you can take breaks. You can step away from the main, you know, conversation, the main table.

You might be able to go for a walk if you want to step outside for a little bit. If you need an excuse to get out, run an errand. Like it's okay.

It it can be a big stressor. And if you're stuck in the same place for four, five, six, seven hours with no breaks, that can be brutal if it's a hard place to be. So don't be afraid to take breaks when you need them.

It is very understandable because especially if you're like an introverted person, then this is work and and no one would expect someone to work seven consecutive hours without a break. That'd be unreasonable, right? So, if you need breaks, take breaks.

Now, we're going to switch gears and we're going to talk about people who might experience the opposite end of the continuum here, which is what if you have too few people around the holidays? And again, I think there's kind of two forms this can take. Some of us are just really lonely and isolated.

Like we don't maybe you don't have family in your area. Maybe you are estranged from your family. Maybe you don't have a significant other, kids, friends, and you just you don't have a lot to do on the holidays.

And that can be a very sad thing because many people do have a lot to do around the holidays. Or maybe you're in a season of life where your family is shrinking a lot. Like maybe you're uh maybe you're a new empty neester and your kids aren't going to be home for the holidays.

or maybe you've lost two or three family members recently and so it's just going to feel really different. You're going to be very aware of the absence of certain people and that's going to totally change the tone. If that's the case, something I'm a big advocate for is don't be afraid to make changes to norms or traditions.

Because if you try to do everything the same and there's one or more like really significant people missing from your holidays, but you try to just maintain it the way it used to be, what it usually ends up feeling like is a sad version of what you really want it to be. It feels like a hollow, empty, like pale imitation of the holidays in your memories. If you switch some things up, you're less likely to compare it quite as directly.

I'm not saying that's going to be some foolproof method to like not feeling grief, but it does help because when everything is changing, trying to resist the change will just make you miserable. And if too much has changed, instead of preserving what little remains, go with the change, roll with it, and actually like amplify it. Change a lot so that it starts to be a brand new thing.

Like instead of making your significantly less magical version of your deceased grandma's cinnamon rolls, order Korean barbecue for Thanksgiving. That's just that's obviously a very random madeup example. Let me give you a more practical example actually.

So two years ago at Thanksgiving, um I guess for reference um one of my children has autism spectrum disorder. And so you know large gatherings that are loud and overstimulated, they can be hard for her. And two years ago in particular, um we went to my in-laws for Thanksgiving and we made it like 45 minutes.

I mean, it was she walked in and I knew it was going to be bad. She had to leave very quickly. We also have another child.

It was my wife's family, so like they weren't ready to leave. So I said, "I'll just take her and we'll just leave. You guys can stay.

" And so we were just going to drive home and do I don't know what. And and frankly, I was feeling a little bit bad for myself. I was kind of having a little pity party.

I don't even like the holidays that much, but still. It's that thing where it's like I didn't totally want to do this, but now that I can't do this, I still feel left out. I bet you guys know what I'm talking about.

So, we're driving home and I'm just, you know, feeling kind of sad for myself. And obviously, it's it's literally Thanksgiving Day, so nothing's open. I'm like, there's nothing to do.

But then we drove past McDonald's and I noticed McDonald's was open. My daughter likes McDonald's and it was one with like the play area thing. So, I asked her, I'm like, "Hey, do you want to do you want to go to McDonald's?

" She's like, "Yeah, we can go to McDonald's. " Um, and so we went there and you know, I think there was like two other families there. I think one was traveling and one looked like they maybe weren't American and didn't celebrate Thanksgiving.

And and actually like it was kind of cool. I have never been to McDonald's on Thanksgiving and it it's kind of like a core memory for me now. like we ordered food and she played in the play area with this other little boy and you know we took a couple selfies and she was like actually happy for the first time all day and like I very very fondly remember the McDonald's Thanksgiving.

It was not what I picture for Thanksgiving, but I was able to have a positive attitude about it and roll with it and realize even in this, you know, maybe non ideal circumstance, I can find good. I can find joy. I can find connection with people.

And that was something that was really helpful to me. So, if it goes dramatically off course, try to find the good in it. Try to roll with that.

And don't just compare it to what you wish it was because that is a guaranteed recipe for misery. If you are really, really alone, consider connecting with someone or something through serving others, through volunteering. You could volunteer at a soup kitchen.

You could volunteer at a church. You could probably even do something with animals if you're not that much of a people person. I'm sure there's dogs that need to be walked on Thanksgiving.

The animal shelters probably have volunteers or employees who want to spend time with their families on Thanksgiving. So, if you're not able to do that, maybe you show up for the dogs and the cats instead. I mean, whatever cause is meaningful to you, you know, I don't know your I don't know what you're into.

I don't know your belief system, but I guarantee there's someone or something who is just as lonely as you who would love to connect with you. And if you can go out and find that thing or that place, it could do a lot of good for you and for them. I also know that a lot of my clients, a lot of my therapy clients and coaching clients get who who don't have like family nearby or who are estranged, they get invited to friends Thanksgivings or like to other people's Thanksgivings and they often decline those invitations because they either feel like it's a it's a pity invitation or they feel awkward or uncomfortable.

And I get that. I do. I know that the idea of like going to someone else's Thanksgiving can feel weird.

But if you find yourself in a situation like that, I want you to really consider accepting that invitation because that is a special thing for someone to open their home and their family to you. I don't think people do that if they don't really want to. And I think you if you have an opportunity like that, I think you should consider taking it.

If you're feeling very lonely around the holidays, stay off social media like as little as possible. It's not going to probably do you any good. The last thing you need to see is a bunch of smiling faces and beautiful table spreads because it's just going to make you feel more alone and more isolated.

And most of those are fake anyway. You know, most of those families fought minutes after that picture was taken. Like I've seen the behind the scenes for a lot of those beautiful looking photos.

They're they're not what you think. So just keep that in mind. Last idea for dealing with too few people around the holidays.

Leave home more. And not just on the holidays because again on the actual days themselves often there aren't many options because not that much is open. I mean just this whole season in general it we tend to isolate and hibernate in the winter and that is not good for us.

Do the opposite. Go to bookstores. Go to coffee shops.

Talk to strangers. Churches have a lot of activities you can engage with around this time of year. There are options.

There are many options for you. It does not have to be this dreadful lonely drudgery that it so often turns into. you do have options.

Third category of problems that I want to deal with today are general holiday and winter conditions. So these kind of don't necessarily delineate based on what your holiday situation are. Just sort of the reality of like what this time of year tend to tends to entail.

We mentioned or I mentioned financial stress a couple times earlier. That's something that tends to hit us really hard this time of year. You know, especially if you're hosting a holiday, then there's a lot of food that goes with that.

But, you know, gift giving, decorating, it's a time of year that, in my opinion, has really been taken over by capitalism. Um, and I'm actually not as anti- capitalist as a lot of mental health professionals are, but the amount that capitalism has inshed itself with our holiday season disgusts me, frankly, because for many people that becomes the the primary driver of what this is all about. Really, there's two things it should be about.

And to the best of your ability, to the best of your circumstances is it should be about family. And if you have religious beliefs, they should be about that. And or just general thanksgiving and gratitude like like what am I thankful for rather than how can I have the best Thanksgiving spread and and just whatever else and how can I make sure everyone has the same amount of presents and I don't spend too much on too much.

And it just gets so you guys know what I'm talking about. It just gets so blown out of proportion. And people get in the Christmas light war with their neighbors.

You don't have to align with this. You don't have to take what the world tells you this is all about and say, "Yes, I agree. I'm going to get wrapped up in this.

I'm going to do it, too. " You have the right to define your own holiday season and to decide for yourself what it is about. And I think you should exercise that right.

I do. And lastly, I kind of said this already, but I'm going to restate it here because it actually belongs more in this section. Get outside whenever possible.

Now, I know some it's not safe to do so. Don't put your life at risk. But it's so easy to just decide like to not go outside if it's cold, if it's snowing.

A lot of us in winter, we just say like, "Nope, I'm just I'm just not going to do it. I'm just going to be home as much as I possibly can. " Depending on where you live, there can be some very real weather limitations with getting outside, but find something like my kids love snow tubing this time of year.

And I typically don't, too. I just watch them and take videos until they get tired. Then I might go with down I might go down the hill with one of them.

But like that, you got to have a little bit of silver lining because I like many of you when I see the first snow there's a part of me that goes like, "Oh crap, here we go again. I don't really want to deal with this. " and having something to offset that.

I think about watching my kids, you know, with their smiling faces going down the hill and I'm like, "Okay, there's that. " Find one or two things. It doesn't matter what they are.

If you can just find reasons to get outside, fresh air, even though it is cold, sunshine, even if it is, you know, 20°, these things still help us. So, to the best of your ability, try to get outside. And if you really really can't, like if you live in like Alaska or something, get a sunlamp.

Sunlamps are legit. They are not pseudocience. Like our our bodies and our brains really do respond to sunlight and warmth.

And if you live in a place where you're going to be like very devoid of that for a long period of time, artificial is better than nothing. So don't neglect the impact of getting out into nature or simulating that experience if you really cannot do it. Lastly, I just want to say again, I know this time of year is hard.

You are not alone. There are so many people out there feeling what you're feeling, thinking what you're thinking, and dealing with a lot of the same dynamics that you are. Don't let yourself get tricked into thinking it's just you.

It's not. I sincerely hope that this holiday survival guide helps you navigate this difficult time of year, and I will see you next time. Take care.