I'm preaching today this message on the marriage and the family and the home and I know that what I'm really preaching on is the the greatest miracle of marriage and it's not love at first sight the greatest Miracle of marriage is love after a long long look a lot of people fall in love at first sight but then they end up in a divorce but how do we hold it together for the long long look instead of just being in love at first sight but staying in love and staying together and loving one another as
God intended us to do First Peter chapter 3 is centered around a couple a famous couple in the Bible their name is Abraham and Sarah and they were a couple in the Bible that I think it's important to underscore they were not a perfect couple that brings hope to me that brings hope to you their lies their family was not ideal and was by no means perfect as a matter of fact they had family pressure you know that Abraham's father was an idol maker he literally made statues and Idols to worship so when they got
religious and they became people of one God can you imagine the pressure from the family what is wrong with you you've gone to that church you've gotten your life right with God we don't want to hear about your all of that was going on in Abraham and Sarah's marriage they lived in a tent the Bible said they never had a permanent dwelling place they were constantly packing up and moving constantly had that kind of pressure on them they had an ugly part of their marital relationship when out of desperation a third person came into the
marriage her name was Hagar and Abraham slept with her and produced a child named Ishmael and so now they have a blended family living in the same house and all of this is going on the contention the Bible said there was bickering and fussing and fighting all of this we think these people were so holy they were walking on clouds they were fussing and fighting and contention going on all in their home if you think that's not enough then add to that the difficulty of raising children and they didn't do it well and then you
see that Abraham lied about his wife when they went and Pharaoh Saul uh his his wife and Sarah was 80 years old and she was so beautiful and so shapely and so gorgeous that the king wanted her at 80 years of age and the Bible said Abraham instead of standing up and saying that's my woman you're not taking my wife that when the king said I want her fearing for his own life not thinking of his wife men can be extremely selfish thinking about himself he said she's not my wife she's my sister you can
have her do you think she just got over that do you think that they just once they got you know God showed up in a dream scared the king to death he said why does why have you lied to me let her go back to her wife you're not who you who he said but do you think she just went right back and said uh come into my arms I love you so much I don't think so I think she was ticked don't you say Amen somebody so he was a man of Faith but he
was not perfect I love the fact that they go through the seasons together they started out at a young age at a married couple and then the Bible shows them as a middle-aged couple and then the Bible shows them and finishes their story in old age Abraham being a hundred and Sarah 99 when she got pregnant so you talk about something amazing so youth looks forward and age old age looks backward and middle age looks worried amen and so they went through youth together they went through middle age together they went through old age and
here's my point and they made it they didn't have a perfect family they didn't have a perfect marriage they had all kinds of situations they had a third party get in it they had the blended family complications they had all kinds of challenges but they made it their marriage made it and yours can too nobody has a perfect marriage but we see in First Peter chapter 3 themes and I'm going to give you real quickly seven ingredients that we must have for our marriage to last the distance First Peter chapter 3 and verse 5 talks
about how that they trusted in God in verse 7 it talks about how they were heirs together in the grace of life it's very obvious when you read the text that in spite of their faults they had an unbreakable faith in God the first word I want you to write down if you're taking notes is if you want to have a blessed and a long-lasting marriage you must have faith in God they had an unbreakable faith that their problems couldn't couldn't break their faith and faith is the key the Bible puts it like this in
Ecclesiastes chapter 4 and verse 12. it says that a threefold cord is not easily broken a three-stranded chord one one strand of the cord may break but if you put two and intertwine them it's harder to break it but if you get it to the place that you have three the strongest form that you can make of a chord is three chords and the husband is one of those strands and the wife is another second strand but then you have God who has to be intertwined and if you don't have faith if you don't have
God if you don't have Jesus if you don't build on the solid rock the home that you're building you must have that threefold cord and Cherise knows that God is first and I know in her life God is first because I won't be the husband and she won't be the wife unless God is in the middle of our relationship that's where you have to start with everything so the first thing is Faith and then we see something else in First Peter chapter 3 and verse one he says that you are to submit he talks about
accepting God's plan for your home and when he does that he starts off by telling the women to submit to the husband as the head of the homes First Corinthians 11 and verse 3 says that God has placed and I'm just the message boy I'm just here to give you this and and and this is what it says he says if you want to know and listen listen you can choose to ignore this you can say that's that's not modern enough that's not Progressive enough for the way I see it but he says I want
you to know that the head of every man is Christ and the head of the woman is the man and the head of Christ is God so you must accept God's plan for the home the second word is acceptance what does that mean that means you accept one another's role and the man is the head that does not say the man is the boss the head of the home is not the boss of the home then what does it mean what does the head of the home mean it means you have as the man the
responsibility of the home you see equality of worth is established in the Bible he said we're neither male nor female in God's eyes and he says there's no one worth more than the other but when it comes to function we're not the same in the function and God said the head of the home not the boss of the home it and the word head means responsibility it does not mean you have greater privilege it does not mean that you have greater privilege it means you have greater responsibility it means if the marriage is not working
you have greater responsibility sir to be the head of the home means if the family is in shambles you have greater responsibility it means you take responsibility it means you have to do the best that you can do and understand the failure uh if I let my family Fall to Pieces it's not her fault I have to take responsibility and I have to understand and God says if you if you understand this and each one understands their role then you can begin to have the ingredients faith and then understanding the role that each one and
acceptance of that role a lot of fussing and fighting over this very thing but once it begins to get in place God can bless that home thirdly there's contentment First Peter chapter three it said that we're heirs together when you study the life of Abraham and you study the lives of Sarah they had a spirit of contentment when they started out they were not wealthy now Abraham became extremely wealthy and Sarah became extremely wealthy the Bible said they had very much cattle Gold Silver and land and possessions they were extremely wealthy later in life but
when they started out they had nothing they were not wealthy they learned the secret of contentment and that's why the Bible said their heirs together meaning that if you don't have this and you don't have that really if you reach that point where I have my husband I have my wife and I have my God and I have food and I have clothes and I am content then you will begin to see the blessing of God we're living in such a materialistic Society we live in such under such Financial pressure and we don't understand the
secret of contentment when you can get along with God and with one another and Jesus said if you've got food and clothing be content if you've got more than that I'm happy for you if you've got just everything that money can buy I'm happy for you the Bible said God takes pleasure in the prosperity of his servants but to whom little is not enough nothing is enough and if you can't be happy just you and your wife or you and your husband and God you won't be happy when it's you and your wife in 10
homes and 10 cars and ten it all goes back down to what really matters in life if you have your wise if you have your husband if you have your God if you've got food and clothing you have all that you need for contentment in your life the next thing that we see in this text the next ingredient is forgiveness for he goes on to say in First Peter 3 beginning with verse 8 through 10 be of one mind having compassion for one another love for one another tenderhearted be courteous be loving in other words
what he's saying is you got to be forgiving all married people must learn to forgive not returning evil for evil and reviling or or just attacking reviling for reviling but on the contrary blessing knowing that you were called to this knowing that if you're in marriage you're called to to to to to to not to be courteous to not render evil for evil to not render uh attack for attack you're called to this and then he goes on to say if you want the next verse says would you like to love life in that powerful
he who would love life how many of you want to love your life how many of you are tired of getting up and being mad how many of you like to get up and love life today he said I'm going to tell you how to do it how many of you'd like to see good days how many of you like to see good days in your house the Bible said in Deuteronomy that your home could be filled with Days of Heaven on Earth it's that's a Bible verse that your days will be as heavy how
many of you'd like to see good days and how many of you'd like to love your life he said then let them refrain and this is all in context with don't re don't give them as good as they send you don't forget be courteous be kind be forgiving love one another he said and refrain your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking guile the King James says all married people must learn to forgive all married people must practice forgiveness and you know the number one thing that destroys homes literal physical homes is not tornadoes
it's not earthquakes it's termites the number one Destroyer little bitty things that you let crawl into your house and those little things team up in little things that bitterness that unwillingness to forgive that spirit that carries a grudge that Spirit not rendering evil for evil or railing for railing but counter wise blessing so there are three levels that you can live life on the first level is the hellish level and the hellish level is when you give back evil for good that somebody's being good to you and doing good to you and trying to do
good to you and you turn around with a bitter angry spirit and rail at them and they they you're doing they are doing good and you're doing evil that's the hellish level and then there's the human level the human level is well if you're good to me then I'll be good to you if you're kind to me then I'll be kind to you if you're loving to me then I'll be loving to you that's human level love I'll give you what you give me if you hurt me I'll hurt you that's really how human level
functions I do to you what you do to me hellish level says I do good to you if you do evil to me but Heavenly level says I will do and give you back good for evil not railing for railing not attack for attack but good for evil listen to me and sometimes the wife has to practice it and sometimes the husband has to be the one who this time I'm going to give good from evil and we cannot allow ourselves to not function in forgiveness forgiveness is so important and the longer we allow those
termites to come up through the floor and eat away at our homes and Destroy because of bitterness and unforgiveness the fifth thing I'm almost done the fifth thing we see in this text is communication he says he that loves life as I said will refrain his tongue from evil in his lips from speaking God Abraham and Sarah were so different the Lord spoke to me and said Jensen and Charisse are so different so different but Proverbs 18 and 21 says you've got to learn to communicate death and life are in the power of your tongue
and then romance likewise you husbands dwell together with them with knowledge dwell means to live with sharing dwell means not just to be in the house but to dwell to live with in sharing the physical part of marriage giving honor listen to those words everybody say those words giving honor to the wife giving honor to the wife there's nothing worse than to hear a guy put his wife down publicly and privately giving honor giving honor God help us to give honor give honor to your wife give honor value show her that she is the number
one human relationship in your life sincere compliments sincere compliments no cheap jokes everybody needs compliments everybody when Charice tells me I look good I feel so good I feel whether I look good or not I believe it if she tells we need to give more compliments to one another we need to speak more things if you think it speak it if you think it if you think they're amazing if you notice something and you see them doing something and you think that's incredible it's so easy to keep that to yourself but say it give compliments
to one another speak it use your communication skills keep joy and excitement and romance in your marriage call your spouse and check in with them all day communicate tell them you're on your ride home the Love mobile is coming in sensitize your lips I'll be there do something that speaks and verbalizes your love one for another do it spontaneously do it as often as you can say I love you out loud let your children hear it let people see it but most of all let her know it let him know it men don't always want
to be the aggressor men also want to know that their wife wants them and desires them how do you fight fair I'm almost done here's the last point the last thing we see in this text is he says make sure that you do all of these things that I've said that your prayers be not hindered the last thing the last ingredient is prayer prayer in the marriage prayer in the family prayer in the home praying for one another agreeing speaking the name of Jesus over your family the name of Jesus over your marriage and I
I know this isn't some super duper sermon this morning but if we could just practice half of what we're preaching up here today our homes we would see good days we would see we would have a good life we would live a good life we would see more contentment and peace and joy and moments that really is all we have when it's all said and done with one another how many of you desire to be the mate God has called you to be let me see your hand whether you're single whether you're married I want
to be that mate that God's called me to be you may be listening to me this morning you may say what's too late pastor my family is disintegrated my marriage is over or I'm living with my husband but it's like single life we're disconnected and broken the good news is If Abraham and Sarah were not perfect we don't have to be perfect we can have all kinds of stuff going on in our families and in our marriages in our home and if we'll just keep coming back to God coming back to the word coming back
to the truth of the scriptures God says I can fix the broken pieces I can take what's left if you've been through a divorce the Miracle's not in what you've lost it's in what's left let him take what's left and bless it and make up your mind that this time as for me and my house we will serve the Lord [Music] this program has been sponsored in part by friends and partners of Jensen Franklin media Ministries for more information about this message and other Ministry resources visit us online at jensenfranklin.tv thank you [Music]