Wise Relationships - Timothy Keller Sermons

we're going through the Book of James in the New Testament part by part let me read you James chapter 3 verses 9 to 18 with the tongue we praise our Lord and father and with it we curse men who have been made in God's likeness out of the same mouth come praise and cursing my brothers this should not be can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring my my brothers can a fig tree bear olives or a grape vine bear figs neither can a Salt Spring produce fresh water who is wise

and understanding among you let him show it by his Good Life by Deeds Done in the humility that comes from wisdom but if you Harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your heart do not boast about it or deny the truth such wisdom does not come down from heaven but is Earthly unspiritual of the devil for where you have envy and selfish ambition there you find disorder and every evil practice but the wisdom that comes from Heaven is first of all pure then peaceloving considerate submissive full of mercy and good fruit impartial and sincere peacemakers

who SE in peace raise a harvest of righteousness this is God's word now we uh we're looking at the Book of James and James is seeking to show us the difference between mere profession of faith and real possession of Faith that's way I'm starting the sermons uh each week just to get that in there he's trying to show us the difference between just professing Faith just just uh subscribing to the Christian faith mere profession of faith and real possession of Faith to really have a faith to really have a living faith to really have a

working Faith now last week we last two weeks we took a look at the first part of chapter 3 which had to do with words and it and it uh and the Power of Words and it moves us right into the next subject which has to do with wisdom and here's why uh James has been talking about the Power of Words And if if you've been listening if you've read it and if you've heard uh the uh uh the impact it should scare us it really should The Power of Words he talks about how the

tongue like a little spark can burn up a an ocean of of forest uh so words have incredible power they can sink into us they can really hurt us uh we said last week and the week before that that the reason words are so important is we're in the image of God verse 9 it says uh we're made in God's likeness and as a result we need words just like we need food and water because you need food and water that makes you vulnerable you have to eat and you might eat something that actually hurts

your digestion you might eat poison you need food so You're vulnerable to poison well we need words and and because we need words we need words that nourish us we're vulnerable to words that don't and words that go down there's certain kinds of words he's saying are poison and they can destroy us so um actually there was an illustration uh that is just perfect for this in the book that the staff has been reading recently it tells about a true story in the 13th century Frederick who is the Holy Roman Emperor now you know the

Holy Roman Emperor uh it's funny there's a lot of stories true stories about these guys because these guys were over people that spoke Italian and German and French and Spanish and so forth you know they they were big shots and um I Charles I you know somebody asked Charles the at one point uh uh say king um you know you're over the Spanish and the Italian and the Germans and the French and all that I what language do you actually what is your language he says ah yes he says uh he says well I speak

uh French to my mistress and Spanish to my God and German to my horse uh you know which and since I know German I I thought I understand uh you know well Frederick uh who lived in the 13th century he had the same kind of issue and he he had this very strange experiment up his sleeve he said I'd like to know what primordial human speech really is uh if you don't teach a little baby a particular language what kind of language would a child grow up speaking what's the primordial what's the basic you know

what's the language of the Garden of Eden so he actually had an experiment he had a bunch of infants brought immediately after birth and uh they were to be cared for and they and they had wet nurses and they were going to be loved and cherished and cared for and given all the basic necessities but no one could speak to them it had to be done in total silence no one could say a thing and the experiment went went went according to plan everything worked they got love they got affection uh they got fed they

got they were slept they had no speech and every baby died you need words The Power of Words we've got to have them and because we're vulnerable if they come in and they're poison they destroy us now suddenly we get to the place where we start to realize this and he says the problem with our words is the heart he says in verse uh uh 10 and 11 he says out of the heart is out of the mouth comes praising and cursing because our hearts are mixed in our hearts is both fresh water and salt

water and the word salt water there's Bitter Water there's both Sweet Water and bitter water the human heart has got the capability of sweetness and bitterness in it and he says you see the problem is if we don't do something about our hearts we're going to be misusing the Power of Words and we're going to kill others and we're going to kill ourselves because we talked about that last week so we have this enormous power how in the world are we going to get the wisdom to deploy it properly how are we going to get

the wisdom and and that's where he turns now he moves away from talking about words and he gets into the whole subject of wisdom and wisdom means right living wisdom means uh the ability to uh live in such a way that we don't kill ourselves and we don't kill other people and uh talks about how we really can develop a heart for wisdom and a life of wisdom it says who is wise in understanding among you let him show it by his Good Life by Deeds Done in humility that come from wisdom uh and so

on now let's just ask the text too questions what is wisdom and then secondly how do you get it because I think that's what he's after and actually he he tells you a lot more about it than you think at first what is wisdom and how do you get it now what is wisdom let me show you a number of things that he says that don't they seem a little disperate but they really all there there's a there's a thread there's a common definition uh for example we're told that um first of all it says

who is wives understanding let him show it by his life you don't show your wisdom by what I'm doing which is your talk you show wisdom by life you really I mean if I sound wise at certain times you he must be wise you don't know that unless you look at my life and don't you know don't all of you look at my life I mean but some of you have to look at my some of you live with me some of you work with me and uh the way you'll know whether someone is wise

is not by what he or she knows but by how he or she lives it's not by what he or she knows but how that knowledge is applied look down here it says peacemakers wisdom is peaceloving wisdom are peacemakers who sew in peace and raise the Harvest of righteousness and here's another little um idea is where it says uh who is wise in understanding the word wisdom is the is the classic Greek word Sophia from which we get our word sophisticated uh and other words but uh the other word is the word understanding which means

expertise or knowhow now what do all these things have in common let me give you a definition then let me draw brought out the definition is wisdom is the ability to see and build relationships of All Sorts wisdom is the ability to see and build relationships wisdom is the ability to take things that are unrelated see and fit them into a relationship wisdom is the ability to take disperate things and put them into a hole wisdom is the ability to see and discern and to build relationships well for example uh right away I I already

showed you he it says that understanding is knowhow leading a life it's one thing to know something it's another thing to know how it relates to life how it relates to everything wisdom is knowledge related worked out lived out related for example there was a great interesting article today in the New York Times sports section about the difference between the old NBA you know basketball stars and the new Stars the old Stars are are kind of getting into their mid-30s which as you know for athletes they're all slower they got to be slower so you

have Michael Jordan and you have Barkley and you get Patrick ying and people like that and then you have all these young Turks that are coming up and they're incredibly uh gifted and you have Shaquille O Neil and you have Hardaway and you got Grant Hill and people like that and they said and it was pretty interesting they were they were uh uh the sports writer was saying this and and in the interviews they were all saying this that the fact is that the young guys are probably a step or two faster now than the

older guys and the young guys are just a a little bit more talented they probably got a little bit more stamina all that but if you actually took five of the old stars and put up against five of the new Stars the old Stars would win all the time and everybody admits it why well they have a lot of ways of putting it you know they say well you know these older guys they they know how to win what is that mean they know how to win what does that mean they know how to win

they they I I I thought it was very interesting Shaquille O'Neil to say this he says you know there's no way to hurry that kind of up that kind of knowledge of the game up what do you mean knowledge they know all the same rules rul you know there's a limited number of rules there's a limited number of things you can do in basketball they all know the same facts they all know the same rules they've all heard the same instructions the difference is that the experienced people with what what the word never came out

they're wiser and what does it mean to be wiser in a basketball game they look out and they see relationships when they get to the court that the young guys don't see I mean uh probably the least athletically talented person who will ever be in the Basketball Hall of Fame will be Larry Bird he's he's the guy he could jump three inches and uh you know he you know he was uh a lot slower than a speeding bullet but he was probably the wisest basketball player I've ever seen because he could look out at the

at at the court and he saw relationships that nobody else saw he saw convergences he knew about he saw relationships between strengths and weaknesses on his team and strengths and weaknesses on their team he saw things he saw facts all the same facts he knew all the same things everybody else knew but he saw how related he saw how they applied he saw openings he saw opportunities which is just a way of saying he saw relationships he saw how things fit together that other people couldn't see wisdom that's what it that's what O'Neal means when

he says they know how to win they're wiser and he's right there's no way you can get to that very fast well uh let's let me go what makes a great musician what well what makes a great musical composer Kathy and I have just uh we were listening to the Grand March from Aida by verie and uh verie has this one spot it's very very simple where um that if I played it you all know it and a lot of you know it just as I talk about it where they two trumpet parts and the

one trumpet part is you know pretty classic but they have another part at the top a simple thing in which one other trumpet part is just is just repeating the same high note over top of the melody line and the it's it's memorable it's famous you know it's world famous it's it's a majestic why because he saw relationship because he had the wisdom to see relationship he took two notes every other composer every other musician knows all the not there's only so many notes everybody's got the same notes everybody's got the same sounds everybody knows

what an OBO sounds like everybody knows what a trumpet sounds like everybody knows what string sound like what makes great music is somebody sees a relationship they say these things would fit together these things come together and they bring them together and it's incredible say why can't I do that why can't I do that because you're not as wise because you don't you don't have wisdom there now you know actually what's going on they're taking facts and they're relating them to each other things that other people don't see relationships to they see relationships they can

bring things together let's go to human beings why is it that over and over again we see here and all the way through the Bible wise people are peacemakers wise people are able to develop relationships and reconcile people and bring peace they're able to bring things together they're able to relate people and relate things and relate groups of people together that nobody else can a wise person knows how to reconcile two people a wise person knows how to how how to you know uh smooth over R ruffled feathers a wise person knows to confront but

not too far you know to compliment but not butter up All the Right Moves all the right things and here's a person a wise person who can hold a group together or can turn people into friends together if that person leaves very often the friendships just fall apart happens a lot why cuz the person's wise wisdom is the ability to bring things together to see relationships and build relationships another way to put it is wisdom is the ability to take a fact take take a concept take a word and make it Concrete in other words

relate it to reality so for example all art is like that AB bezel who was The Artisan he was the uh the Craftsman who who uh was the leader of of all the artists that built the Tabernacle and they were doing crafts work and Metallurgy and they were doing uh weaving and so on it says the reason that they he was able to do it the reason he was able to do art was God gave him a gift of wisdom art is wisdom why art is taking something that's kind of a concept and relating it

to reality for example what we say he dramatized it what does that mean he took something that was kind of abstract and he showed how it works out he shows how it related and you say oh I never saw that well what's going on when you say never saw that what you mean is I knew that I didn't see that what are you talking about I see how it relates and that brings us to the ultimate the ultimate wisdom the Bible says what does it say it says the beginning of wisdom is the fear of

the Lord now fear of the Lord let me remind you is not mean you're scared of the Lord but in the old I mean you know it says in Psalm 130 I'll say this over and over again Psalm 130 it says there is for forgiveness of sins from you therefore I fear you and when people see that they right away realize that their understanding of the word fear is obviously not fitting with what the Bible is meaning when it uses the word fear why would you be full of fear at the knowledge that God loves

you because the word fear means to tremble with awe to be amazed but here's what it's saying you have not begun to be wise the beginning of wisdom is when your knowledge of God becomes something that you're relating to is when you're relating the knowledge of God to you to your life sometimes in fact just very recently somebody came up to me and it was a great compliment they said they were talking about a kind of Spiritual Awakening and since they said a lot of things I hear at Redeemer I've heard in churches all my

life but here they've become 3D what does that mean or when somebody says you know I've known that all the time but it hit me what does that mean it hit me I realized God was this or God was that spiritual wisdom comes whooshing through your life using a very very important little um tool if then if then you know what if then means when I hear somebody say wait a minute I always knew God was holy but if he's holy I always knew God was loving but if he's loving I always knew Jesus died

for me but if he really did that then see well why am I mad why am I sad why am I living like that why am I why why do I feel Superior why do I feel in fear why you see if this then what's going on your knowledge is being ched into wisdom all of us that's our that's that's really what it means to try to grow as a Christian all of us as Christians have far more knowledge than we've got wisdom we don't know how it relates you see the only reason that we're

worried the only reason that we sin the only reason that we're upset the only reason that we don't do everything that we're supposed to do is because our knowledge hasn't been turned into wisdom and it happens when you say oh my God gosh if then and at that moment the way uh Edwards puts it is the difference between notional knowledge and spiritual wisdom is the difference between knowing that honey is sweet and experiencing the sweetness of Honey on the tongue you've moved from knowledge to wisdom the same thing happens with God what makes you a

Christian and not just a religious person is that you've moved from knowledge to wisdom you've seen how it relates you said well I always knew that I was a sinner but now I feel it I sense it I realize it I've always known that God loves me but now I see it I sense it I realize it what's going on wisdom and therefore finally what does it mean to be wise it says who is wise understanding among you let him show it by his good life now this is very important to see there's two Greek

words very common both of them and they're both translated good in English and this is one of those places just like the word love there's a number of other words where there's uh there's more Greek words than we've got English words and you see one of the very common Greek words that's used in the New Testament is the word agathos which means good in the sense of morally correct proper you you know that sort of thing good as opposed to evil but that's agathos but but then there's another Greek word Kos which means beautiful and

lovely as opposed to ugly and do you know which word is being used here it's not saying wise if you're wise let your the wisdom will Express Itself by your good life the fact is you could actually be very moral with wisdom without wisdom excuse me but real wisdom makes your life beautiful what makes something beautiful what makes beautiful music is you take sounds that have no relationship to each other and you relate them to each other through Rhythm through Harmony through proportionality you relate them that's what moves it that's what makes it beautiful and

what makes your life beautiful if you notice it says the opposite of wisdom is disorder see that in verse 16 rather here's what goes on a beautiful life a wise life is first of all a life in which you relate things in your life for example your care of your body and your care of your soul for example care of relationships cultivating relationships and at the same time using your gifts in work you know you have to have rest you have to have work you have to have inside you have to have outside you have

to have your spiritual side you have to have your relational side a wise person has got them all in Balance they're related to each other and perfect they're not eating each other up you know they're related to each other they're not against each other not in Conflict nor are they dis uh disengaged from each other but they're in perfect balance a wise Life is Beautiful because all the parts of it are related to each other and secondly a wise Life is Beautiful because all the parts of it are related to reality the word becomes flesh

that means you take a concept and you relate it to reality people who've got incre ridiculous goals unrealistic goals people who think that they're good people when they're actually sinful people people who are out of touch with what the Bible says the nature of reality is and the nature of the human Universe of relationships is and the nature of the human heart and so forth well there's going to be ugliness and Brokenness a good a wise person is someone who takes the truth and makes it flesh the word become flesh you work it out it

becomes beautiful that's wisdom seeing relationships building relationships relating things that had no relationship before now how do you get this you know somebody says wow that's interesting how do you get this now we're not talking so much just about U uh you know some of these things are gifts let's face it obviously basketball wisdom is a gift though there's a lot of work involved they'll tell you uh artistic wisdom musical wisdom those sort of things are gifts uh even I guess we could say in some ways relational wisdom is gift but let's let's go to

the ultimate the beginning of wisdom is the fear of the Lord the beginning of wisdom is a spiritual wisdom that spiritual wisdom flows out into the rest of your life now how do you get it and I would say that the text tells us here um really two things if you first look at it it looks like he's saying you just work hard see it seems to be nothing but exhorting who is wise understanding and if you read it superficially you you'll see you'll think he's saying be good you know be good forgive don't be

selfish you know uh keep on going down here uh watch out for being Earthly and unspiritual uh don't be proud be peaceloving work on relationships and in a way he is saying all that but but that gives you the impression and a lot of people get that impression that he's saying wisdom really comes from just your hard work period And in the old days in the ancient times almost all cultures in a way that they they don't now you know one of the reasons why modern culture despises age is because they have lost the whole

concept of wisdom all the ancient cultures all the traditional cultures tremendously uh you know respected their Elders why because just like Shaquille O'Neal said You Can't Hurry Up wisdom there's just no way to there's no way to get a Vulcan mind melt you know and and you know the wisdom comes on in it just doesn't happen that way uh my modern culture has pretty much lost the concept but all the ancient cultures all of them they saw the Greeks loved wisdom you know Paul says that the Greeks love wisdom everybody loved the Chinese love everybody

was after wisdom what is wisdom ah the ability to have an orderly life the ability to relate your life to reality the ability to relate all the parts of your life to one another the ability to make peace the ability to relate notes to each other so it's beautiful music the ability to relate uh uh substance to each other so you have art I mean they understood that they understood that was wisdom the ability to relate things the ability to see it the ability to make mobiles you know balancing everything off of but they all

thought it was just something that you had to do really work hard the Bible tells us no it's a gift you have to seek it and you have to work it out but it's a gift and there's two ways you see that in this text the one is it says um it says uh let him show it by his Good Life by Deeds Done in humility that comes from wisdom now this is a reference back to chapter 1: 6 the other place where James talks about wisdom and this is I'm going to call this the

penultimate way you find wisdom and then I'll give you the ultimate Way the penultimate way is you got to suffer back in chapter 1 this is what we read consider P pure joy my brothers whenever you have faced Trials of many kinds because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance perseverance finishes its work and makes you mature not lacking in anything so if any of you lack wisdom you should ask God who gives generously to all now now we talked about this at length back then but let me just remind you again

because it's been a while long time you see what he's saying he says count it Joy when you have all kinds of trouble why he says trouble strengthens your faith creates endurance matures your character and brings you to wisdom you don't get wisdom unless you get out unless you put your unless you get into situations where you're in trouble where you're out of control you don't get wisdom until you're humbled and there's a number of reasons why wisdom means being in touch with reality do you see that one of the main themes of this paragraph

is the prouder you are the more insane you are the prouder you are the stupider you are the prouder you are the less wise you are the prouder you are the more out of touch with reality you are in two ways and I don't have time to elaborate but here are the two ways the first way is one of the great pillars of reality is whatever you are whatever you have that's good whatever you are anything about you that's good and admirable and and and better than anyone else is a gift 1 Corinthians chapter 4

anything that makes you different than anybody else is a gift that's in in 1 Corinthians chapter 4 it says why do you act as if anything better than you as a gift you realize now think about this if you look what is the basis for racism what is the basis for classism what is the basis for sexism yes what is the basis for hatred of gay people if there's anything in you that makes you think you're different and better than anyone else even if that's the case it's a gift and for you to be where

does all racism and sexism all this stuff come from you're out of touch with reality if you are you are what you are by the grace of God no matter who you are no matter whether you're a Christian or not you say I've made myself what I am yeah what the Bible says is sure you didn't choose your IQ you didn't choose your family you didn't choose the century in which you were born you didn't choose your race you didn't choose you know uh your F you didn't choose any I mean you know suppose you

were born you know on a Mountaintop in Tibet in the 12th century you wouldn't have an MBA then would you he said well I've worked hard for my MBA oh with what you got you didn't work hard for what you got you worked hard with what you got but you got it and so the first thing you know one of the best ways to say humility is wise and pride is always stupid means it's out of touch with with reality and so many of our problems the racism all that just just that alone the Brokenness

of the world is coming from that being out of touch with that not being humble wise people are humble wise people make sense to be humble about who you are is being in touch with reality and Life Will Go better and there will be a balance and to be proud is Brokenness everywhere pride is stupid but not only that of course besides the fact that everybody is what they are by the grace of God you also have to remember that you're a sinner in addition to that you're a sinner and if you don't know you're

a sinner you're totally out of touch with reality now you don't find that out unless something goes wrong almost always as John Newton once said years ago no one ever learned they were a sinner by being told you have to be shown it has to happen you have to see your limits you have to see your weaknesses and you will never be weak unless you go through troubles and you will never therefore be wise you'll never have the weak the meekness of humility but that's I call that the penultimate way you develop wisdom the one

way you develop wisdom is things come into your life that humble you and you start to get to know who you are and and pride destroys relationships Pride makes it impossible for you to see relationships there's no you know there's a million examples but let me just say sometimes on the basketball court as anybody know who knows basketball at all the most talented guy who is a ball hog the most talented guy who is proud the most talented guy who is self-centered is stupid team will never win absolutely not the more humble see that the

more wise the more you see relationships that's what an assist is a the big big the more assists the more wise you are anyway okay but here's the ultimate the ultimate Way is it's up there wisdom has to come down from above you see that it's very very clear it's not here it resides up there well what does that mean to say it resides up there well in uh Proverbs CH 3:19 we're told by wisdom the Lord laid the foundations of the World by understanding he set the heavens in their place so God's got wisdom

God and in the ultimate Act of wisdom he brought order out of chaos he created us he created all the inter relationships and beauties of nature all the inter relationships and beauties of the human being and soul all the intricacies and Rel you know all you know God is the source of all beauty of all narrative pattern of all stories of everything he created the ultimate wisdom but here's the interesting thing his wisdom doesn't just reside in heaven this spiritual wisdom obviously if we could just get up there and get God's wisdom there's a wisdom

behind the universe there's a word behind the universe there's a wisdom and an order behind the universe boy this think of all the ramifications we can go into which we cannot this is the reason why there's a design behind the universe this is the reason why you know that if today something weighs 200 lb tomorrow it'll weigh 200 lb of everything else being equal because the uniformity of nature because because there's wisdom behind it there's a mind behind it there's a word behind it but how are we going to get up there well James is

wise enough to say you can get this wisdom because even though it resides it has come down see the wisdom that comes down well how did it come down here's all we can say the Greeks knew that there must be a wisdom behind the universe they saw nature you know there's people who are always going to say uh you know uh the universe is an accident there's no wisdom behind nature and yet they can't yet every day they assume that nature is uniform that that there's a rationality in to Nature uh they assume mathematics work

they assume there's a moral order they assume all these things they you live as if there's a wisdom behind nature because there is the Greeks weren't so stupid they knew there was and they thought well they believed it was an it was a realm of abstract ideas that you could know through contemplation but John says the word the wisdom the logos through which God created the universe the word became flesh and dwelt among us and we beheld his glory glory is of the only begotten of the father full of grace and truth and you know

what that means the Greeks should have known if whenever you see wisdom in anybody's life it's always a relationship it's always relational surely if there was a wisdom behind the universe it wouldn't be something you could know in the abstract you'd have to be have to relate to it the wisdom behind the universe is a person you have to know personally a person you have to love a person you have to commit yourself to not a person that you arrive at through contemplation the Greeks should have known it we should all know it if the

essence of a wise heart is relationship then wisdom itself behind the universe would be a relationship and you know Christians believe that God is Triune there's always been a father Son and the Holy Spirit and for all the problems that that creates you know rationally and logically what it means is relationship is the key to Nature and Grace relationship is intrinsic to the universe because God is a relationship because God is filled with relationship from all eternity that's the reason why wisdom is what it is but the ultimate wisdom was not even Jesus creating it

was on the cross you know why there he related the two things that could not be related any any other way God's love and his law his truth and his love those things were unreconcilable but in the most ultimate Act of wisdom he brought them together and as a result he brought God and us together that's wisdom and when that gets into your heart when you taste that not just know about it when you get your nose spiritually in the Honey Jar you Christian wines the poos when it when it catches fire in your heart

you become wise you know why you finally see that truth and love should not be pitted against each other and one thing we talk about at Redeemer all the time unless you see the cross you're going to have a religion of Truth you know do it all right a religion of love just find myself you're going to you you won't know how to deal with suffering you'll just deal with truth I must be you know listen if you have a religion of truth and you suffer you get mad at yourself I must have done something

wrong and if you have a religion of love you get mad at God God why would you let anybody suffer but if you've seen the cross the wisdom of God is I'm a sinner but God loves me so much he's entered into my suffering so that he died not that I might not suffer but that in my suffering I might become like him the wisdom of the cross the wisdom who we can know who brought the ultimate unre irreconcilable things together take that into your heart you will become wise it's the wisdom that has come

down let's pray father there so much more we can explore but we cannot would you show us more and more what it means to be wise oh Lord make us wise people let this become a church of of wisdom teach us how to be wise and bring the word and make it flesh in our lives let our relationships let our our vocations let our our use of our gifts in our in our jobs let our um the balance of Our Lives let all these things characterize be characterized by your wisdom the wisdom that flows not

just in some general way from a world of ideas but wisdom that we can know personally in Jesus Christ who died on the cross he has been made unto us wisdom and right righteousness and sanctification and redemption in him all the treasures of knowledge and wisdom are HID let us know that let us experience that make us wise we pray in jesus' name amen [Music] oh [Music] oh no [Music] oh m