what's good man what's happening Brother what you got for me G all right man so I went through a pretty rough breakup about three four months ago now and I think I just kind of came to the determination after talking to you know friends and family was man I gotta upgrade the tier of women that I'm dating you know I kind of got in this bad habit of allowing the women that approach me which AR always you know probably in my league I would say uh just to put it in the best way uh I've
gotten a little lazy with that approach just kind of taking what comes to me and and it's kind of led to a couple bad relationships along the way man it's just I think the problem is I need to start kind of putting myself out there a little more and um trying to meet women I think that are of higher quality better tier okay so where are you living Nashville all how old are you 28 so these girls that are approaching you that you're settling for where are they approaching you at mostly organic settings so I
mean I mean it could be the one was in the grocery store one was while I was at the gym uh a couple down Broadway you're gonna have that on the weekends so it's it's been a mix of places but uh a good I'm not gonna lie there's been a good portion of them that are down town which is not the best pool to be yeah right so you're relying on girls approaching you downtown and then what what ends up happening that you realize that These Girls Aren't good quality H there's a lot of early
signs I mean one how easy they are to get off the bat which is usually not a good sign for me I obviously you know things worth having are usually a little bit more of a fight or there's usually some kind of uh dance between the two of you right some kind of mystery she creates a lot of these girls have just been too easy um they just kind of give it over and let me let me let me stop you right there I think this is a mistake that a lot of guys make yeah
every girl is easy it's just the level of where she thinks you are yeah don't get that confused guys some of you y' you will sit up here and be dealing with a girl that is purposely making your life harder because she doesn't think your sexual market value is that high or she's playing a game and you you now confusing that as her being high quality no no no no every girl is easy if she sees you as a nine at 10 so that shouldn't be your only metric yeah for judging if a girl is
high quality keep going yeah well and I'm sure there's probably some aspects of me that I could improve on the outside aesthetically that would put me on the higher end of what I could be looking like right I don't yeah I don't necessarily walk around I don't have a high sense of fashion all right I kind of just I put on whatever I put on and I kind of get away with that being that I naturally have some better looking features that you know so I get away with wearing lesser than desirable clothes and stuff
like that but um there's probably some some improvements I could make there um okay so okay let me ask you how often are you getting with girls who you consider as eights and above gotta think about that hang on I got I wantan I want to come with with an accurate answer so that I don't want to just [ __ ] you so the let's just say for every for every five girls I would take on a date it might be one or two the rest are kind of just below that they're solid six maybe
a seven um hey you wna get it you want to get it to more what like five out of five for me I I think I've got what it takes to be nines at least okay so you you got you got what it takes to get nines yeah okay in my okay so in in order for you to get that high quality girl she has to see you as being a nine of 10 or even more so if if you're just kind of like oh I'm gonna get whatever I can get mentality I'm not GNA
maximize who I am as a man maximize my looks maximize my fashion maximize my status you're not getting that nine yeah because the guys that the you as much as you want her the guys who are nines and tens want her as well do you have any status uh in the real estate scene here I do okay but social media social media uh I've got a pretty decent I mean a little over 8,000 um okay so and it mainly all through real estate um but nothing nothing phenomenal um not there's been a couple of them
they were a players there's been a couple along the way um but I think that some of the you know they they they they fell for what they seen and then they kind of met I think there was some flaws on the inside and I'm the guy that that you uh that you kind of that you talked about the other day about that had the issues with you know questions about what kind of work we can do on the inside so I think there was some character flaws that they're encountering you know because every now
and then I get with these a players here there's only been a couple of them here that I've you know been on first dat with and talked with for a second but it's not the outside that they had a problem with it was there I think there was a couple character flaws that what what do you mean by that what do you what do you think what do you think it was uh so for one of them I think there it was the main thing was there was she was getting a large a sense that
I was being uh that I would be overly controlling okay why is that what were you doing that that gave that away I don't know if it was me being overly assertive or if if it was when I had a problem with things I was overly vocal about that or overly opinionated but I I I tend to have a strong opinion about the way that I feel about things and when she does something wrong I mean I have no problem letting her know I have a problem with that I don't know maybe it was maybe
I still really assertive for her but there's been a couple where it's repeated that I've got similar feedback so maybe I tra it Trace back to my childhood in some way you know because I had I had a controlling father and maybe that somehow kind of trickled its way down to me but he was controlling with women so you know I don't want to be that way um I want to be different especially especially with hotter girls right because most men are trying to do everything they can to get her yeah right so you never
want to be controlling or you never want to be toxic but you still want to have some balls yeah you still want to have you still want to establish you know that you have boundaries right but let what I'm talking about if your sexual market value was maxed out women would give you a lot more wiggle room to be more assertive yeah and and and I get on the external like outside there's a few things uh I'd hit the gym but like if we if me and you went shirtless right now I'm sure you got
me right you're probably your your your physique is phenomenal you're lean I'm I'm probably I've let my gut go a little bit it's not I'm not rocking a beer gun or anything but it's like you know could I step up my physique a little bit more yes uh could I could I revamp my wardrobe absolutely you know there's some tweaks that I could make I think that would uh probably afford me like you said a little bit more privilege yeah but uh yeah I I guess I guess I don't know if I'm prioritizing that over
the main concern is like do is there something on the inside that I need to address because like or do I just focusing primarily on those external factors you can do both you can do both I don't know why you guys think that is always either or why can't you work on both why can't you work on your wardrobe maximize your looks be more fashionable and work on having more self-control yeah and work on not losing your mind whenever go to something wrong having some emotional intelligence why can't you do both yeah why can't you
be more self-aware and and and when the conversation is happening or an interaction is going you are conscious about what you're doing and saying and how you're handling it by still establishing your boundaries but not coming across as like a crazy person right I mean yeah personality wise con like the conversation I can have the I do fantastic with the intro like meeting women there's no problem I have in getting them to like me off the bat I think it's once once I they get I get used to them and then they start to see
the full spectrum of some of my flaws and my personality I think those are the things that um and does that happen usually more with the girls you think are hotter or every girl mainly with the girls that I think that are hotter I mean the ones that I would consider a players the what the ones that I would commit to on in a long-term relation right so that's the problem the women that you have a higher attraction level for you t you tend to kind of want to force it to work out maybe I
am and it's yeah I mean with the girls who you don't really give a [ __ ] about you don't you you don't really give a [ __ ] yeah so they they might want to stay longer but the girls that you think are hot you like act right because I want you to act right that's where you get the disconnect from the girl like oh this [ __ ] is crazy yeah instead of you having that nonchalant Tak it a leave it Vibe regardless of how attractive you find the girl so maybe what's really
going on is you don't know how to keep women that you're really attracted to and get them to respect you at the same level that a girl who you don't find that attractive I think you're kind of hitting right on the on the head there it's because like I said I don't actively get out I don't put myself out there very of I've always been more let me just put it this I'm more selfish right I've always been more self-focused I put I've always put more time into myself and my career than in women and
uh while I'm young I want to take advantage of that opportunity to do that for myself but it's like uh what time women have always been kind of something that fit into my schedule let me just put it that way um right and you don't you don't have to make them a priority yeah I think when you guys think when you guys hear me say hey work on women you you think I'm saying hey bro go spend five hours a day talking to girls that's not what I mean I'm saying have enough practice with them
so these kind of things don't happen I'm sure Brandon you would like to have maybe one or two girls who you think are nines in your life that you can keep without having to go through this vicious cycle again of not getting the kind of girls you want maybe them running away like it just takes a little bit of work yeah I I'm G bring I'm gonna bring one one to your attention like I got one that I'm hanging on to that is one of those a players where it's like we got past the initial
dates but she started to kind of see some of that like my personality as well and then started to get you know question so I've distanced her a little bit and she wants another date but I'm kind of holding off to see if I need to do some personal work before I have you have you slept with her yet oh this is crazy so um we've had she's been in my bed multiple times and I just decided to exercise like the self-control uh but she been in my bed multiple times in her thong thinking that
I was going to make a move and I didn't that's what's caught her off guard is because most men that get her in bed would have and I've not so that's what's kept her kind of on the hook okay okay okay slow down slow down why aren if she's been in your bested every times why haven't you [ __ ] her you just don't want to see because I when I met her I kind of seen her as like a potential long-term fit and I was wanting to take it a little more serious I um
I decided to slow it down a little bit oh my Lord God this is a card no sin Cardinal mistake do not make this mistake guys I had I literally had a call I had I had a call today with a student of mine who was explaining to me the exact same thing that is a horrible strategy here's why a girl being that hot right you know what she's you know what she's attracted to dominance she's attracted to men that are not afraid of leading what she listen when a when a no matter if you
want something longterm or not women these days are [ __ ] and if she feels like you're not confident enough to at least her emotionally and physically she won't have any respect for you so if you haven't already [ __ ] her and she's already behaving to the point where you having a pull back she's already started to lose respect for you so you're making a you think that's a connection there bro you gota bro women love they love to get [ __ ] you got F it's I don't you know I don't I wouldn't
say that I've necessarily just been afraid to make a move I'm I'm I'm very your plan is safe your plane is safe your plane is safe Brandon because you want it to work out and that's that's operating out of scarcity this girl is really bad she's really hot let me take it slower and hopefully she stays longer look I'm not gonna if I took her on she's waiting on me to take her on a date again if I took on a date if I wanted to bring her back here I I would the last time
I asked her to hang out she wanted me to come to her pool right and do a night swing so it's like I know what she's expecting next it's not that it's not that the opportunities necessarily lost or off the table it's just that I'm kind of like saying okay fine whatever if maybe I go have sex with her but like at the same time I still got to make sure that um whatever is going on on the inside the character right is fixed that that way once we get past you know we get past
sex and all that and we try to do something that's more committed long term it's like it you know is but you got to slow it down bro you gotta get to some [ __ ] first before you can see here's the thing here's the thing fit I'm here's the difference between me and probably a lot of the other guys you talk to is like I've got that out of my system man I the amount in my college days the amount of I've had all the sex that I need I don't I don't necessarily need
I've tried the options I've tried you know I've tried everything I was curious about right I've gotten to that point where it's not necessarily in my system to go go find somebody else to [ __ ] again it's saying it is I'm saying I'm saying women their biological nature is to respect men that they think are better than them right when you're not [ __ ] her it's hard for her to she doesn't so why do you okay let me ask you this I'm end with this why why has she been pulling back for you
to pull back what's been going on there's been a couple like just most of it's been in conversations we've had where we've had disagreements and there's arents there's been some arguments that have come from that but it's it's it's stemming around the same subject like ways that I am that are different from her uh but kind of pointing to similar issues I think their character flaws that other women have already pointed out which was why I was like you know maybe I need to get that addressed I don't know so it seems like you're trying
to force these interactions to work out yeah and with women no matter what your your stances and perspective I are you kind of have to let things play out and she will over time fall into your frame it's where I think what's going wrong is where these girls are feeling like you're controlling is they feel like you're trying to force them into your frame and women hate that [ __ ] you're trying to like make her I think that that made that just clicked when you said that I'm trying to force them into my frame
right that's why that's why she feels like hold the [ __ ] up man we ain't even [ __ ] here this [ __ ] sharing me sharing all bro you no you got me there because that was one of our dates I uh I did a couple moves that were more kind of like in the Romantic category before we had even had sex and that and she kind of pointed them out like bro like we haven't even so yeah yeah that's what I'm saying bro she's waiting for you to lead her fully before she
can fully submit to you you're trying to make her submit to you and then lead her no women have to be led to be to to then yeah yeah all right okay that makes sense all right you got it bro you got you can figure this out you got it take my right all right