has someone you love and care about recently told you that they are considering or want a break what do you do when this happens now naturally when this happens there is going to be this flood of devastation of panic of heartbreak of feeling like we did something wrong of looking for a way to solve it what we have to do is for a moment quiet our emotions as much as we can we're human we're gonna let them out but we have to quiet them enough to have a reasoned conversation with this person and this conversation
is absolutely vital because it can literally mean the difference between you wasting months or years of your life and finding something or someone that is right for you the conversation is in three parts number one you ask them why they want to go on a break and you do this as calmly and as reasonably as possible because what you want is an honest answer the reason you want an honest answer is because you're gonna have to use that to evaluate what you do next now they're gonna give reasons you have to ask yourself are these
reasons to do with them are they to do with me are they inside my control or are they outside of my control all of these things are very important things to ask once he's told you all of this your next step is to ascertain whether these problems that are necessitating a break for him are things that have to be solved from without the relationship or whether they can be solved from within the relationship as a team as things should if a relationship is truly strong if it's truly that relationship that we're going to be in
for our lives it should be able to withstand difficult times it shouldn't require the team to break up for it to work then you ask do you think that we can solve these things by being a team together because i am willing to do the work to make that happen you would have to be too but if the both of us commit i believe we can get through this do you if the answer to that question is no i need a break part three comes in you say i understand you want to break but my
definition of a break is a breakup i believe that in a relationship we can get through anything together but not if your version of getting through something means without me in the picture that's not the teammate that i want and deserve so i understand what you feel you need to do and that you're going to go and do that but i need to now move on and of course the gamble you're taking which you must already know about because otherwise you wouldn't be doing this is that i won't be there when you decide you want
me but i can't allow your gamble to become my gamble my gamble would be staking my time and my energy and my life and my future on the possibility the hope the fantasy that maybe one day you'll come back i'm not prepared to do that my life is too precious i love you but i love myself and my life more and i have to move on now if you want to break so i understand you want a break but i'm going to treat this as a break up and move on accordingly f scott fitzgerald once
wrote the girl worth having won't wait for anybody make no mistake people will come and go in life but your time can never be replaced guard it like the precious jewel that it is and if you're watching this and you realize that now that you're about to have this conversation there is real heartache coming for you i have a free guide on how to overcome heartbreak you can find it below i'll link it up here know that you will be okay know that you are enough and know that you are loved we'll see you next
week you
